Chapter Text
"It doesn't matter whether you're killing people or saving them... You'll never encounter something that'll exceed your expectations. That loneliness. That hole inside you... There's nothing in this world that can fill it. You'll be lost. Wandering in the darkness for eternity."
- Oda Sakunosuke
Gravity will always pull an object back to the Earth. Throw it as far as you can, but no matter how high it gets for a moment, it will always come crashing back down.
Kunikida was in his office doing his pile of paper work on his desk until he heard a loud knock on his door. Kunikida sighed heavily, still a lot of work on his desk left to complete. He couldn't afford to be distracted for more than three minutes otherwise his schedule would be thrown off.
"You can come in..." Kunikida muttered, only hoping this wouldn't take long.
"Long time no see eh? How are you doing Kunikida-kun? Well done, you became the new armed detective agency president! Too bad we have to be on opposite sides... What a shame, right?~" A voice spoke in a teasing tone as the door opened... It was almost familiar.
Kunikida eyes widen and look up to see who it was... It was Dazai...
"... Dazai-san. Why are you here...?" Kunikida inquired, in a state of shock.
Years prior they had been friends, something more than that even. And now here they were, forced onto opposite sides due to their major positions in their organisations. Dazai could've stayed in the armed detective agency... He didn't need to go back to the mafia. Yet, in the end, Kunikida knew it was the man's choice, even if it wasn't morally correct and if they were enemies. Two things he couldn't grasp an understanding of, though, was why Dazai had left and why he was currently back at the agency, standing inside of Kunikida's office.
"Can't I just come in and visit my old friend~?" Dazai chuckled and closed the door behind him as he walked to the nearest seat and sat down on it, looking around the office.
"Such a dull office you have Kunikida-kun~ So colourless~" Dazai sighed and crossed his legs as he looked at Kunikida and grinned. Kunikida felt himself getting a bit frustrated now, his lips pursed and thin.
"I know you Dazai. You wouldn't risk coming here, especially as the new port mafia boss. You must have some ulterior motive of some sort..." Kunikida explained. Dazai may be smarter than him, but Kunikida wasn't stupid. When something was suspicious, he could tell.
"Smart as always~" Dazai chuckled as he hummed and lay back on the chair; putting one of his legs on the other leg's knee, identically to how he had years before.
"Can't a man just visit his old friend?~" Dazai teased with his ever so annoying grin of his.
"Not exactly, Dazai. You are the port mafia boss and I am the armed detective agency boss. We are not meant to be seen with each other, let alone be with each other in the first place!" Kunikida said, pointing to both of them as he spoke exasperatedly. Dazai wasn't dumb, he knew that. Dazai was aware what the man had just said was true. Kunikida knew that Dazai was already aware and was teasing him just like he used to, but he didn't want that.
That couldn't happen.
Not anymore.
If Dazai had wanted to see him, he could've stayed on the side of good. But no, he just had to stray to the dark side. After all, Dazai had never felt as if he belonged at the agency. His blood was mafia black, theirs was a pristine red. The difference between them couldn't be any smaller yet any bigger.
Dazai chuckled and sighed as his grin faltered a bit before he continued his usual cocky grin.
"I know that very well~ It'd be a bad look if we were seen together~" Dazai stood up and walked towards the desk and stood in front of it.
"But what about our personal relationship~?" Dazai said as he put his hands on the desk and slightly leaned closer to Kunikida.
"You left that behind when you left the agency. You know that just as much as I do. As much as I would've enjoyed to continue being your friend, you abandoned that just like you abandoned everyone else for your own selfish desires of going back to the port mafia!" Kunikida's voice went from quiet to an irritated exclamation. It may have been something cruel to say, but it was something that Dazai had to hear. If he hadn't said it, who would have?
"Selfish desire.." Dazai mumbled with a bitter tone. Dazai's eyes darkens, he didn't like that word. But he knew Kunikida's words rang true, he knew that.
Dazai's hands tighten into a fist as he clenched his teeth. He was annoyed. Annoyed because every word that came from the other's mouth was true. That was the only reason Dazai could've think of on why he was so irked by that.
"What if I tell you I had my own reasons?" Kunikida sighed, thinking for a few moments before replying.
"I might believe you. You're a smart, masterful person though, so you could easily lie to me just as you always would before. That's your choice though, and that won't change how I see you now. I see you as a traitor. You used your time and information from the agency to attack us so, even if you do lie to me, I won't forgive you. Not yet. And don't even dream about a friendship because- ha! -It's laughable really." He spat in an annoyed tone. Dazai's expression fell as he heard what the other said. Dazai was quite taken back. Yet, he wasn't surprised to hear that coming from Kunikida. Dazai didn't answer, he knew the other was true. Every word.
After a few seconds of silence, Dazai finally spoke.
"How cruel of you...Kunikida-kun~" Dazai said with a mock offended tone and a pout. The usual Dazai demeanour was back. And his smile, as usual, didn't seem genuine.
"Don't smile like that. Please, it does my head in! It's all fake!" Kunikida yelled, getting a bit overwhelmed with not only the surprise visit, but it being none other than Dazai. And he was mocking him. He felt his head splitting, but not in the way that it used to when he dealt with Dazai. It wasn't like when they were "friends". No. It was worse.
In the past few years that the two hadn't seen each other, they'd grown different. Kunikida had eyebags comparable to two black holes and more grey hair blending into his now dull blonde. Dazai had been causing so much trouble for him that he had to overwork himself than he already did and it was obviously taking a toll after a few years.
Dazai's expression fall again when Kunikida yelled.
Dazai wanted to laugh. Laugh at how bad Kunikida looked. Overworked and stressed out. But he didn't. Dazai couldn't. The Dazai from the past would've joked around and poke fun at Kunikida for looking like that. But Dazai was feeling something he wasn't familiar with.
Something new.
Guilt.
Dazai's eyes widened for a short moment before he returned to his usual expression.
"What do you mean fake?~"
"What do you take me for? An idiot?! I've been around you long enough to know when that smile is forced onto your face!" Kunikida grumbled, knowing he was correct. After all, he vividly remembered his time with Dazai. He also remembered the man's genuine smile and had learnt to differentiate real from fake.
This was going to be a long day...