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River knocks on the door with a six pack of beer in his hand. He isn't sure he will be heard over the loud music, but he knows this much, you don't show up to a party empty handed.
„River, you're here. Come in!”
A pretty brunette greets him at the door. Katie, is her name. River noticed her smiling around him, always touching his arm the few times they met. He thinks he has a good chance of making out with her by the end of the evening, not that he's terribly interested in Katie. It's just nice to kiss a girl at a party sometimes.
He let's her grab his hand and pull him inside. They're in the nice student house, the one where you have to pay extra to get a bigger bedroom and don't have to share the bathroom with the entire floor. As a reward for good grades the students got permission to host a party after a final round of exams. Everyone passed so far, a full class of fresh-faced recruits on their way to become intelligence agents. River knows that less than half will make it all the way to the end, his grandpa warned him, but he wasn't really going to share that with anyone. Especially not tonight.
The beer he brought seems unnecessary as the place is stacked with paper cups and bottles everywhere. A proper party, someone even arranged for big speakers that make you feel the bass pound in your chest. Katie smiles at him over her shoulder as she leads him inside. If River was a little braver about those things, he'd stop, wait for her to turn around and try to kiss her already. Only casual romantic pursuits aren't really Cartwright's thing, at least not very often.
*
River's late, the party's already in full swing, there's people dancing to music without care or laughing in small groups. Some kid blows a puff of smoke in his face. He doesn't mind, it's a nice change of scenery from endless assignments and rough physical training.
„Do you want to sit down?” the girl asks.
„Can I get a drink first? Maybe something stronger?”
„Here, take mine. I'll go get more.” River accepts her cup and sits down on a sofa. He looks around. River doesn't live in the nice dorm, and neither does Katie. Spider Webb does.
Webb's in the far corner, talking to his dorm mates, people Cartwright doesn't know very well. He thinks he has rather little in common with the rich kids, other than Spider, of course. He and River clicked right away.
They're close, signed up for all the same courses, even made plans to become roommates next fall, or as soon as one convinces the other to move. Secretly Cartwright hopes they could split rent to a small apartment. He didn't discuss it with Webb yet, felt embarrassed to bring it up, but he had already started looking into local housing offers. He awaited the moment Spider would stop dragging him to the pricey cafe every morning before classes, his friend was annoying like that, if not persuasive. In any case, River would rather start his day by making him coffee at home himself.
He hears a short, bright laugh and his eyes find Spider again. Webb's leaning on some guy, laughing into his ear. Cartwright doesn't like it.
He watches the way Spider's fingers dig into the fabric of a hoodie on the guy's shoulder, an overly familiar gesture. He exhales through his nose, doesn't know why it bothers him.
„Here you go,” the girl returns and hands him a drink.
She's nice, River smiles. He takes a small sip but spits it back into the cup immediately.
„Mhmm. I'm sorry, did you mix it with ginger ale? I uh, hate that.”
She laughs at him.
„Aren't you picky. Fine, let me get you...”
„Actually, have you seen Spider?”
River's disappointed, he's lost sight of him. It's fine, it's nothing, he tells himself, but he wanted to say hi.
The girl rolls her eyes.
„You know what, why don't you get your own drink. Seems like I'm wasting my time anyway,” she says and leaves.
Okay. Awkward. He didn't mean to be rude, he just really doesn't like some flavors very much... River's about to get up and pour himself something else when he feels a weight across his knees.
„Ah, you've made it! I'm so happy you're here, mate, everyone's here now!” Spider exclaims as he throws himself sideways on his lap and wraps his arms loosely around River's neck. „Are you having fun, River? Isn't it a great party? Mike convinced his brother to let us use those big speakers.”
Who's Mike, River wants to ask, but pushes the thought away. It takes a bit of effort, Spider sitting on his lap is a first, and a distraction.
„Yeah, they're great. I can hardly hear you,” he offers.
Spider leans in closer and laughs into the crook of his neck. River knows he wasn't being that funny, so either Spider is in a very gleeful mood or already drunk.
„I really am happy you're here, River, you know? You're such a good friend... I never had a best friend, I'm so happy it's you...” Spider says, the declaration surprisingly genuine.
He starts touching River's face. Slides his thumb across River's cheek. Okay, very drunk, River decides. He blushes all the way when Spider kisses his cheek. Webb sees River's reaction, snickers at him for it, kisses both his cheeks this time, the side of his face and even his nose once. Nobody seems to pay them any attention in the dimly lit room.
„What are you doing...”
Whatever he wants, River knows, but he has to ask. Spider only answers with another playful kiss on his chin.
There's an air or entitlement that usually accompanies his friend, something River likes to poke fun at sometimes just to humble him a bit. He's the type of person to send back a drink at a bar if he doesn't like the shape of the ice cubes. It's just that Spider's frivolous wishes don't usually entail, well, this.
„Don't be mad, please? You can be mad at me tomorrow, but not tonight. You're a good friend, Cartwright, it's all in good fun...”
Webb tilts his head, offers a sidelong glance and a cheeky smile. With hazy green eyes and flushed skin he looks dreamy to River, otherworldly, like some sort of angel or a mermaid. The sight kind of takes his breath away. It's only Spider, he has to remind himself, the kid who teased him for the cut of his trousers the first time they ever met.
When he plants another kiss on Cartwright's neck this time, River tenses up, inhales. His hands go to Webb's sides instinctively.
„Okay, I don't think you mean it...” River tries to gently make him slide off his knees, to no avail. Webb clings to him like a little monkey, if those ever got drunk at parties.
„No, no, no” Webb gestures with a finger, clearly in an argumentative mood. „You really are a good friend, do you know that? You're a solid guy, Cartwright... You don't let me win, ever, not like the rest of those guys. You beat me in the race last week, fair and square, mate. Which is fine, because next time I'll be faster and I'll beat you...”
He keeps pouring nonsense right into River's ear, his mouth brushes against an earlobe in an attempt to make himself heard over the song. Cartwright chokes down the discomfort and indulges him for a moment, amused by his mood.
„When we're done with the training, we will be the two best spies at MI5. And we'll always be friends...” Spider sighs and hugs River in a tighter embrace, shifting his knee so he can face him chest to chest.
Who knew, Spider Webb was such a sappy drunk.
*
River has no choice but to hold him. He carefully moves his hands to Webb's back, afraid to cross some unspoken line. Spider doesn't seem to mind. Cartwright decides to tuck his chin into the shoulder pressing into him, Webb's not the only one who likes a good hug. Because that's still all it is, a hug between two friends, right? He glances across the room, but people have more interesting things to do, there's really no one looking, no one judging him for it. He lowers his gaze for a moment.
He enjoys the shape of the body leaning into his own, the size of it, the obvious strength in Webb's muscles. All like some puzzle piece perfectly fitted against himself, one he didn't know he was missing. They're so close, he can smell the expensive green cologne Spider dabs on the skin behind his ear. „Is that mint, lemon? The green scent, what is that,” River had asked once. His friend's beauty routine secretly fascinated him. „It's bergamot. From Italy, of course, none of that cheap stuff”, Spider explained, not that it meant much to Cartwright.
Or maybe it's just Webb's breath after too many mojitos, River guesses when Spider pulls away. He misses the way Spider looks at him, his blown up pupils suddenly making his eyes look dark. The sight of open mouth and glistening lips catches River's eyes instead before his friend leans in close again.
„You're such a good friend, River Cartwright...”
The praise spoken into his neck throws him off more than anything. He can feel the words under his skin, vibrating. It's not just the music. Something uncoils deep inside, a layer of tightness he didn't know he was holding.
„So handsome, so strong, so good,” Spider keeps going.
„Oh...”
River can't help it, he lets out a little noise. He longs for more, whatever this is. For a second he fears perhaps the moment's gone too far, only Spider seems completely fine with it all.
„...and we'll always be friends, River, don't believe me? Look, I can do this,” he confidently grabs River's head with both hands and presses half-open mouth to his ear.
River groans, it's ridiculous. Why is Spider stuck on this idea of kissing?
„And this,” another kiss lands somewhere on River's face, meanwhile Spider's fingers begin to wrap around strands of River's hair.
They are affectionate, but not like that. Cartwright's whole face is burning red by now, fighting embarrassment, pleasure and something of a growing excitement in his pants. It has to be alcohol that has his body reacting, River tells himself... Webb's entire body weight pressing into him currently, well, it isn't helping.
„...and we're still friends,” Spider concludes with a hazy expression. He really has to be quite drunk, but the way he scans River's face, considers it, as if finally allowed to, seems very deliberate.
*
It's not the first time the topic of kissing has come up between them. River often sees people approach Spider, ask him out, the man certainly has no trouble finding dates. One evening, hanging out and staying up late just because they could, River had asked, „So, how many people have you ever kissed?”
Spider laughed at the the question, both innocent and prying, but generously shared the information. It wasn't that many, but the double digits still made River's eyes go wide, it was so much more than he himself had ever experienced. „And you?”
"Four. Six if you count kindergarten."
Naturally, Spider laughed in his face when he heard the number, but not completely unkindly.
„Oh, River... Kissing is not a big deal. It's just... kissing, it's nice. And it's easy. Once you get the hang of it, it's like walking through a door...” Spider had said, grinning a little, and looked at River differently then. Although the moment had passed and nothing happened, River remembered it for some reason.
*
Maybe that's all it is, not a big deal, River debates, since his friend is still sitting on top of him, in a very friendly mood indeed. The light kisses all over his face don't seem to end. River shuts his eyes, he can't help but laugh.
„You're so drunk, do you know that?”
Spider laughs too. He then does something River wasn't expecting, although maybe he should have: he kisses him on the lips. It's softer and gentler than River could've anticipated. It only lasts a few seconds, but something electric shoots through his stomach, settles low in his gut. River never really thought about kissing a guy, or that it could feel this way. Or maybe it was all just Spider...
They try again. It feels good, right, it's like their bodies really do fit together in every way. A rush floods River's body when Spider makes a pleasured noise, but Cartwright's too scared to act on it, to make the kiss deeper or move his hands. All he thinks is that he wants to hear it again, wring out more of the little moans from Spider and keep them somewhere in a jar for safekeeping, just for himself... The irrational thought disappears as quickly as it formed when Webb pulls back.
„Do you have plans for the summer?” Spider's question comes out of nowhere.
His speech is slightly slurred, the pretty smile lights up his face again and he starts playing with River's hair again. Does kissing really come so naturally to him that he's not bothered by it? River on the other hand could melt into the couch they're on: the touch, the petting, it's all too much. He wants it to end, somehow. He wants it to last, forever.
„What?” he mutters in a daze.
„The summer, River. I thought you should come with us, me and my sister are staying in the countryside. She won't bother us at all, she has a pony to play with. There's a shooting range, we could do target practice, catch crayfish in the lake... Wouldn't you like that, River? You and me...?”
The green eyes blink, wait in anticipation, they seem to ask for so much more than River understands, but he wants to say yes, to all of it. He only nods his head slightly.
„Oh, good..! We're going to have so much fun, River.”
Spider nuzzles his neck and presses one last kiss above his collarbone. In return, River holds him a bit more confidently and Spider lets out a contended sigh.
„Those crayfish, they can't really hurt you if you hold them right.”
He falls asleep then, still held by Cartwright, their hug suddenly so out of place at the rowdy party. River lets him slide off to the side and sits him next to himself.
Someone spills an iced drink on the couch by accident, barely missing both their necks. River decides it time to evacuate. He helps Webb get up and leads him to his bedroom. He could go back to the party downstairs but instead lays on the edge of Spider's bed, without disturbing him and watches him breathe until he falls asleep himself...
*
They wake up late next morning, Spider looks surprised to find Cartwright in his bed.
„Are you okay after yesterday?” River feels the need to check in. He asks the question in a quiet voice and looks at Webb from up close.
„My head is spinning. What the hell happened. Did I say something...?”
„That you want to catch crayfish with me.”
Spider laughs and shakes his head, blushing. River's never seen him embarrassed before. Spider rolls onto his back and stares up at the ceiling.
„I didn't kiss you last night, did I?” he drops the question casually.
„Only maybe fifteen times.”
The response elicits a groan and a covered face, River laughs. He turns to his back as well and stares off into nothing. If yesterday wasn't supposed to mean anything, they'll both laugh about it later; if it was something more than just a drunk mistake, he wants to try it again.
River hopes it's the latter.