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Kim Dokja: Why is everyone so obsessed with top or bottom? Honestly, I’d just be excited to have a bunk bed.
Tang Mo:
Tang Mo: I'm gonna tell them.
Fu Wenduo: Don't you dare.
Tang Mo: Who do we know that has handcuffs?
Kim Dokja: Well Fu Wendou and I-
Fu Wenduo: *elbows Kim Dokja*
Kim Dokja: ...wouldn't know.
Kim Dokja: Is there a cactus where your heart should be?
Tang Mo: What’s up your ass this morning!
Fu Wenduo: *walks in* ...Hey.
Tang Mo: Hmm… nevermind.
Kim Dokja: WAIT NO!
Kim Dokja: Thank you all for coming.
Tang Mo, wearing a hospital gown: When I heard you couldn't get laid, I dropped everything and came straight here.
Kim Dokja: Well, I couldn't imagine anyone else being part of the "Fuck Kim Dokja Task Force".
Fu Wenduo: Yeah, I interpreted that in a different way.
Fu Wenduo, gardening: Hey, can you bring me the hoe?
Tang Mo: Yeah, sure.
*A few minutes later*
Tang Mo: Here you go.
Fu Wenduo:
Tang Mo:
Kim Dokja: Why am I here?
Tang Mo, looking through their clothes: Has anyone seen my top?
Kim Dokja: Fu Wendou's in the kitchen.
Fu Wenduo: Are you sure this is the right direction?
Kim Dokja: Certainly, I'm as sure as I am honest!
Tang Mo: In that case, we're definitely lost.
Kim Dokja: If you had to choose between Fu Wenduo and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose?
Tang Mo: That depends, how much money are we taking about?
Fu Wenduo: Tang Mo!
Kim Dokja: 63 cents.
Tang Mo: I'll take the money.
Fu Wenduo: Tang Mo!!!
Kim Dokja: If I die for good, my funeral is going to be the biggest party ever and you're all invited
Fu Wenduo: If?
Tang Mo: Great, the only party I've ever been invited to and they might not even die.
Kim Dokja: Do you ever feel bugs on you when really there's nothing there?
Fu Wenduo: Those are the ghosts of the bugs you killed before.
Kim Dokja:
Kim Dokja: *sobs*
Tang Mo: You fucking scared him, you idiot.
Kim Dokja: Do you mind if I slyly mention that you're single?
Fu Wenduo: Do not do that.
Kim Dokja: You won't even notice!
Tang Mo, entering: Kim Dokja, you wanted to see me again?
Kim Dokja: Fu Wenduo's single
Fu Wenduo:
Kim Dokja: Fitness tip: never stop pushing yourself. Some say 8 hours of sleep is enough. Why not keep going? Why not 9? Why not 10? Strive for greatness.
Fu Wenduo: Next time you're working out do 15 push ups instead of 10. Run 3 miles instead of 2. Eat a whole cake instead of just a slice.Burn your ex's house down.You can do it.I believe in you.
Tang Mo: There were so many mixed messages in that I can't-
Kim Dokja: So are you two dating now?
Fu Wenduo & Tang Mo: Yes.
Kim Dokja: Why?
Fu Wenduo: I happen to find Tang Mo very appealing.
Kim Dokja: Yeah, I can understand that.I'm trying to figure out what's wrong with Tang Mo.
Kim Dokja: *Stubs their toe* FUCK!
Fu Wenduo: Mind your language!
Kim Dokja: What else am I supposed to say, “Woe is I”???
Fu Wenduo:
Kim Dokja: You have to accept that swear words are necessary sometimes.
Kim Dokja: Oh, fiddlesticks.
Fu Wenduo: Look, I understand this is a tense situation, but let's watch the fucking language.
Kim Dokja: I am an expert at identifying birds.
Fu Wenduo: Okay, what about those ones flying over there?
Kim Dokja: Yeah, they're all birds.
Kim Dokja: Thanks for pulling the fire alarm, you saved me from giving an oral report about The Scarlet Web.
Fu Wenduo: You were too lazy to read the book?!
Kim Dokja: I was too lazy to watch the movie.
Tang Mo: Any idiot would know that.
Kim Dokja: I knew that!
Tang Mo: See?
Tang Mo: Fu Wenduo...
Fu Wenduo: Oh no, 'Fu Wenduo' in B flat.
Fu Wenduo: You're disappointed.
Kim Dokja: There is no future. There is no past. Don't you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every fact.
Tang Mo: ...All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.
Tang Mo: Why would you think any of this was a good idea?
Kim Dokja: Probably because I'm a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence.
Tang Mo:
Kim Dokja: I don't know how you keep forgetting this.
Fu Wenduo: Would you like something to drink? *They open the fridge* We have water, milk, juice, spiders, Dr. Pepper-
Tang Mo: Spiders?
Fu Wenduo: Spiders it is then.
Tang Mo: No, that wasn't-
* But they were already pouring them a brimming glass of spiders…*
Fu Wenduo: So what's for dinner?
Tang Mo, staring at the food they just burnt: Regret.