Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Sometimes you'd spend an inordinate amount of time in his shop. Either doing something mundane or pestering him while while you had the chance.

Usually, the PA system would threaten that if you took too long they'd blow up your diving gear.

But you realized a while ago that staying near Sebastian stopped the detonation signal. You figured it was because of the scrambler strapped to his back.

So you had all the time in the world to flash lights in his eyes and shake around a gummy light, watching as him go from annoyance to anger.

"I'm surprised they haven't detonated your diving gear yet, considering you act like this." He said, sneering.

If only he knew he was probably the only thing stopping you from exploding right now.

You laugh softly. "Sorry, your reactions are just so... cute."

"Cute!? Just what do you think I am...?! Some... thing to entertain you!?"

"No, but... you're adorable, I can't help it. The way you act and dress... even your voice is-"

He let out an indignant huff.

"How is my clothing cute!? I sought out only the finest clothing to adorn my visage, it's regal! Breathtaking!"

You shrug. "Your cravat looks kind of cute, in a silly way. Like seeing a fish with a top hat."

You thought you'd seen him angry when you flashed him with that beacon that one time and he yelled at you to get out.

The look in his eyes bordered on outright malice.

"It. Is. Not. A. CRAVAT." He said, practically snarling."This!" He gestured down to the frilled thing hanging from his neck. "Is a jabot you uncultured piece of-!"

You suddenly heard a loud thwap of his tail against the far wall.

Wow, that really ticked him off...

"S-sorry, that was too far." You said, patting his tail.

He let out a huff.

"I should toss you into the water and make that suit of yours detonate." He said.

An empty (you hoped, at least) threat.

"And lose your only customer? Your "only friend"?" You asked, smiling.

Having his own words thrown back at him made him glare at you.

"Why haven't you gone on your way yet?" He asked, sighing.

You mumbled something hoping he couldn't hear.

You were scared.

The twitch of his ear fins told you he heard.

"... Just because you're scared doesn't mean you get to be an asshole." He said.

"I dunno, you're a dick to me. Making fun of me when I die, or when I buy something from you before coming down here..."

He went silent.

You laid your head down on his tail. "I really am sorry."

He didn't say anything, but you did feel his tail curl inwards, like he was trying to protect you (or is that just what you want to think?), all with a scowl still on his face.

Chapter Text

The next time you stopped by and pestered him went differently.

A lot differently.

When you crawled into his vent he looked at you and you could see his smile falter somewhat before returning.

You bought what supplies you needed and when you were done...

The look in his eyes told you he knew what was to come.

You shook around a gummy light and flashed it at him, the combined light and sound tipping him over the edge and lunging for you, growling as he smacked it out of your grasp.

He was still snarling as he said, "Do you know how aggravating that is for me!? Do you know what it's LIKE living with these mutations? I can hear it so. Much. LOUDER. Than any human." His chest rising and falling rapidly. "That's not even getting into the light and how much it hurts my eyes... I bet you never even BOTHERED to think about how it feels to feel everything so differently. To constantly have your senses heightened to insane degrees."

This...

Made you feel genuinely awful.

You didn't realize-

Of course you didn't fucking realize.

Before any more words could leave your mouth he pointed at the vent.

"Get. OUT." He said.

You ashamedly turned around and left.

You could've sworn you heard sobbing, or attempts of it at least, as you left.

Chapter Text

You knew you were going to start trying to avoid him, feeling too guilty to even try interacting with him.

As you came across a familiar vent with a light shining on it, you were already preparing to walk on past and open the door with a code breaker when you noticed something.

A blue hand sticking out of the vent.

"Hey, asshole, down here." He said.

You stopped in your tracks and stared at him, struggling to fit his comically large body in that comically small vent.

You didn't know why he was down there until you heard, and then saw, a flash beacon go off in your face.

You heard maniacal giggling coming from the vent as you tried to blink away the after image of the lights.

Just as you were almost clear of it you heard him put it aside and bring out something else.

It was another flash beacon.

Before you could cover your eyes he flashed you again, giggling even more.

Fuck, right, he probably has a whole stash of them to sell to other expendables.

You heard more movement and this time you covered your eyes.

"Aw, come on, you're not gonna hide from the big scary monster like a coward, are you?" He said, and you didn't even have to look at him to know he had a shit eating grin on his face. "Oh, right that's the only way you can deal with us!"

As he burst out laughing you slowly lowered your arms and had to cover your face again when he began trying to set it to go off again.

"Aww, what, not gonna hide in a locker from me? Just gonna cover your face like that? If I was an angler you'd be dead by now! Hah!" He said.

"Look, I'm sorry okay? I'll never do it again!" You said.

"Hmm..." He paused. "And how can I be soooo sure you'll stick to your word, huh?"

You paused.

You weren't sure how to convince him.

But the idea of having to deal with getting flashed in the face non stop instead of having a shop to heal and buy light sources from in a pinch halfway down to your goal was... less than ideal.

"I... I'll let you kill me if I break my promise!" You say.

The scoff you heard surprised you.

"What kind of person do you think I am!? You know I used to be a human too, right? Do you think I want to go around killing all willy nilly?" He said. "Besides, if I wanted to you'd be dead by now."

"Psh, are you sure? I figured you were too fancy to get your claws actually dirty-" You were cut off by feeling a clawed hand grab your ankle and pull you forward, knocking you on your ass.

"Oh, trust me, I am very capable of ending you, you little-" He pulled you closer to him and he sneered at you, letting you catch a glimpse of his long, sharp teeth somewhere between a sharks and an anglerfishes.

You tried to kick his hand but it was no use, he was too strong.

Shit.

Maybe he was actually strong enough to kill you.

"I have a question, are you scared of sharks? What about snakes? What about deep sea creatures with long, sharp teeth? Because I have news for you." He said, dragging you even closer. Your leg felt like it was dangerously close to his mouth and sharp teeth. "Ever since Urbanshade got their hands on me I have so many predators woven into my DNA I have to stop myself from getting hungry when a poor little expendable wanders in bleeding and injured."

You swallow nervously.

"I mean, I'm part shark, of course blood is gonna be appealing, y'know? And have you seen what sharks do to people? You're lucky I mostly just wanna get out of here and not hurt people, because I could take off a persons arm in one bite."

"S-so... what would make you believe I'm not gonna bother you anymore?" You ask, visibly nervous.

"Hm..." He loosened his grip on your leg. "Give me all your research. Right now."

You blinked.

"That's it?" You ask.

"Oh, trust me, I'm not giving you anything in exchange this time. Have fun trekking down below without my wares. Hope you have enough for a revive, or to bribe the workers up there to take you back without the crystal." He said.

You shakily hand over everything you collected.

He grinned widely from ear fin to ear fin seeing the amount.

"Okay, now we're even." He said, flipping through the folders.

You let out a sigh of relief.

"If you survive til next time, it'd be a pleasure doing business again!" He said. "Oh, right, here. May as well let you save a code breaker at least." He said before handing you the keyboard for the door.

You mutter something and walk off as he suddenly yelled out, "See you when you inevitably die!"

The door closes behind you and you sigh heavily.

Dealing with the angler, or even a pandemonium, is gonna be easier than having just dealt with him tonight, thats for sure.

Chapter Text

Despite the set backs, despite the lack of supplies from that smug asshole, you had gotten far enough that you had reached the Ridge.

You had the crystal in your hands, got it in the container for Christ's sake.

But when you ventured forth and tried to get out like instructed you ended up in a dark room and couldn't find a locker in time before an angler got you.

Fuck them and the fact you didn't even get proper warnings in the Ridge.

Next thing you knew you were sat at a table in that same liminal space between life and death with him again.

"Hey bestie." He said, smiling.

You glare at him.

"Let's see what got you this time... ah." He flipped open the document and you felt a sting of embarrassment as no text became unredacted because you'd died so much to this thing.

"Maybe try hiding from the big scary monster next time, yeah?" He said, smiling. "You know, if I didn't know better I'd think you liked big scary monsters..."

Sweat trickled down from your forehead.

"Well, hope you have enough for a revive, otherwise it's adios." He said.

You shakily handed him a ferryman token.

His smile grew.

"Did you want to be put back right where you left off or do you want to start from the beginning?" He asked.

You already knew your answer.

You wanted-

You couldn't admit that to yourself yet.

"The beginning." You say.

"Excellent. I'll be waiting." He said in a single song tone before everything went dark again.

And then you were at the submarine dock again, less items and less ferryman tokens than before.

You hurriedly ordered some supplies before starting, hearing him say it's in the crate nearby.

"Special delivery, just for youuu." He said over an intercom.

You could practically hear him roll his eyes from here.

You grabbed a medkit and a flash light before tucking them inside your suits pockets.

You took a deep breath and began searching for the keycard.

This time would be the time you actually got it, you could practically feel it.

Chapter Text

You crawled into his shop for what felt like the millionth time.

You were tired and injured and as soon as you entered the small room you laid on the floor for a good half a minute.

Sebastian stared at you with a confused look on his face.

"Are you... good? Not dead are you?" He muttered, "... If so, first time someone's been polite enough to die in my shop so I could get some supplies from their corpse."

You groaned. "I'm not dead, give me a moment."

You got attacked by one of those fake doors. How were you supposed to know they could show up behind keycard doors!?

Then a squiddle got you in a dark room.

You really needed a med kit.

You slowly got up and walked over to Sebastians tail.

You quickly grabbed a medkit and shoved the required research into his hands.

Sebastian made a face.

"... What? I gave you the money." You said.

"Are you... really this bad at this? Didn't I give you one of those before this round even started?" He asked.

You groan. "Look, I've been run ragged! I haven't had an actual rest in..."

You don't actually remember. It almost feels like you've been stuck in this blacksite for ages. The only rest you really got was that liminal space between life and death where Sebastian mocked you, and that hardly counted.

"... I'll stand guard and let you nap for 500 research." Sebastian said.

You look around at the shop.

There wasn't a lot of good places to rest, but you were desperate.

"F-fine, let me patch myself up first." You said.

You opened up the medkit and began tending to your wounds.

As soon as you were done Sebastian held out his hand.

"... 500 research for this seems like a bit much." You said.

"Trust me, I'm veryyy good at protecting people." He said, smiling that same toothy grin.

You sigh and hand him the research.

You start looking around and trying to find a better place to sleep.

"... 50 research and I'll let you use my tail as a pillow."

You blink.

"W-what!?" You ask, face red.

Sebastian shrugged. "Just an offer."

You weigh your options and how much sleeping on the hard floor would suck.

You were going to be bled dry by this man.

You sigh and pass him the last bit of research you had.

"Excellent." He said, taking it and tucking it away somewhere on his person.

You move closer to his tail and lay your head on it.

It was somehow rougher and yet softer than you expected.

Better than the ground at least.

A lot warmer too...

Sebastian pulled on his lure and turned out the light.

You fell asleep embarrassingly quick.

You were awoken to what almost sounded like gunfire.

You looked up from Sebastian's tail and saw the light from his lure was back on and his arm outstretched.

He looked down at you and said, "Don't worry, just go back to sleep."

You were too tired to argue with that.

You fell back asleep.

When you finally fully woke up you saw a blood stain on the floor and scattered bits of dry wall.

You blink.

"Enjoy your nap?" Sebastian asked.

"Did... did a wall dweller try to attack me?" You ask.

"Yep! I got 'em though." He said.

You look him over.

It's only now you really noticed he had a gun of all things holstered onto his side.

You realize you really were testing fate every time you flashed him with a beacon or a gummy light.

"How long was I out?" You ask.

"Couple hours. I'm surprised only one of these things showed up to be honest." He said.

You fully stood up and dusted yourself off.

"I'm gonna go now. They're probably mad I haven't kept progressing in a while." You were almost scared to leave the radius of Sebastian's scrambler.

He sent you on your way and as soon as you left the vent you heard a beeping sound, and it all went dark.

Chapter Text

"Seriously!? What the hell got you, you just left my shop-"

You blink seeing Sebastians eyes and lure in the inky blackness of the room.

You really aren't in the mood for this right now.

"You suck at being a harbinger." You say before pausing.

Is that even the right word? Harbinger? Or is it psycho-whatever? ... Or reaper?

"Hey! I have an engineering degree not a fucking make people feel all nice and cozy before death degree!" He said, grumbling as he flipped open the document.

He paused upon seeing it was PDG suit detonation.

"Ah. Ah, maybe letting you nap for so long was a bad idea... that's on me."

You stare at him.

"Here, on the house." He said, handing you a token.

You sigh.

Here you go again.

You are dropped unceremoniously at the entrance to the black site.

You blink from the suddenly change in lighting.

You buy another flashflight and med-kit using your kroner.

You begin your trek further into the blacksite.

Chapter Text

Many expendables came down here.

Only a few acted right, and some of them he had to strong arm into it like that brat with the gummy light.

The ones who changed had a softer spot in his heart, but the others?

His patience was getting thinner and thinner by the day. He almost considered closing up his shop if they were all going to act like this.

Another expendable came down and when they bought a flash beacon off him he prepared for the worst.

This time when the bright lights hurt his eyes he suppressed an angry growl.

When he heard them laugh after he couldn't control himself.

He couldn't keep taking this. This was too much.

He lunged at them, grabbing their arm and crushing the flash beacon in their hand.

"Don't. Do that again." He growled, tossing them back down to the ground.

He hoped it hurt. He hoped it mirrored even a fraction of the pain he's felt from all these... fucking assholes down here.

They slowly got up and Sebastian realized they were bleeding.

Guilt bubbled up inside him.

He wasn't- he didn't want to- he sort of did but-

Did he go too far?

Before anything else could happen more people entered the store to the sight of what just happened.

He wasn't sure what to expect. Anger? Surprise? Something else...?

But instead whatever guilt or panic he felt went away the moment the new ones flashed him with their own beacon.

He snarled at the flash of pain in his head and yelled, "GET OUT OR I'LL KILL YOU."

He heard laughter in response.

He couldn't fucking take this.

He took the gun out of his holster and aimed.

The person looked shocked but not scared.

Not until he pulled the trigger and shot them square in the head did the others realize he was serious.

"Does anyone else want to try!?" Sebastian asked, teeth bared, pointing the gun at the others. His chest rapidly fell up and down and his gaze switched between all of them rapidly.

They all raised their hands in surrender.

"That's what I thought. I'm going to make this nice and easy. Either you all stop doing this, or I'm going to start shooting to kill on the first offense, got it?" He said, sneering.

They nodded.

The bleeding one reached for a medkit on his tail but Sebastian slapped their hand away.

"Not today. Leave my store. Now." He said.

They all began scrambling to leave the room, rushing out of the vent like scared dogs with their tails between their legs.

Sebastian sighed and looked at the body on the floor.

He briefly considered not even touching them, knowing what happens when he does so.

In the end wanting more items to trade won out.

As soon as he touched the body he was transported to a black room.

They were sat on the opposite side of the table, looking scared.

"I warned you." He said.

He flipped open the document.

He almost laughed at how it was phrased.

He really did laugh when he realized they didn't have a ferryman token.

He shouldn't be happy to see someone permanently die, and yet...

He sent them on their way.

When he came back to he had to shake his head.

It was always jarring.

Whatever in-human monstrosity Urbanshade spliced into him, the blacked out one even he didn't even know about, surely had some interesting effects.

He grit his teeth.

He really wished he didn't have these powers.

All he wanted was the loot.

He pat down their corpse for anything to sell to other expendables.

All he got was 3 batteries and a regular flashlight and a small amount of research.

Sigh.

He picked up the body and dragged it out of the vent.

He was gonna do what he usually did, drop them off somewhere abandoned so the wall dwellers could eat.

It's not like Urbanshade was interested in giving them a proper funeral.

Or even other expendables...

He wondered if the others even cared their friend was dead.

Chapter Text

Sebastian noticed his... least favorite of his favorite expendables crawl into his shop.

Frankly put, there were better expendables.

The ones that brought him trinkets and gifts, the ones who were polite and courteous and never once flashed him.

But this one wasn't the worst.

Probably helped they had so many ferryman tokens. Easier to get to know someone when their death wasn't as assured as it usually is down here.

Some people, the nicer ones, finally stopped showing up a while back.

A part of him wondered what happened but...

... He didn't like thinking about that.

Especially since they should've showed up before him if they died in here.

He didn't like the implications there.

What either other prisoners or urbanshade themselves did to them.

He shook it off and smiled, "Hello, friend."

"Hey Sebastian." They said.

They reached for their signature gummy light.

Sebastians eye twitched.

They looked up at him. "I'm um, not gonna shake it if you're worried." They tucked it into their pack.

Sebastian was audibly relieved. Okay, they were going to keep their word. Hopefully.

He hoped they didn't find out what happened to the others.

The blood stain was still on the floor...

"Thanks friend. Say, why do you even like those things? They're hardly great at what they do."

The expendable smiled wide. "Oh that's easy! They're easy to charge, the noise helps me focus, and the charge is so short it's easier to avoid angering squiddles!"

"W-wait, you like the noise?" Sebastian asked, head tilted.

"Yeah, is that weird?" The expendable asked.

"Freak."

The expendable laughed. Almost cut- nope! He didn't think that freak was cute. Surely.

He grumbled softly.

"Anyways, guess I'll try to save them for you since you like them so much. I doubt the other expendables would behave with them anyway." He said.

"Giving me special treatment then, huh?" The expendable asked.

"Don't push it." Sebastian said.

"Sorry, sorry." They said. "Ooh, you have a flash beacon too."

Sebastians ear fin twitched.

"Um, sorry, I'll just- be quick about putting it in my pack. Sorry." The expendable said, giving him the required research.

He exhaled with relief when they didn't try anything.

"Hoping to get to the ridge again this time. Gonna need this." They said as they tucked it away.

Sebastian paused.

Right.

They were technically on opposing sides.

It was easy to forget.

He hoped they didn't get it. He was torn between not wanting them to die and not wanting them to win.

An awkward position to be in.

"Ah, yes... I hope these items serve you well." He hoped the expendable didn't pick up the odd tone in his voice.

They gave him a thumbs up and headed back out into the black site, leaving Sebastian all alone again.

As he sat there, he realized just how messy this whole thing could become.

A stark reminder of why he tried not to make friends down here in the first place. It never ended well.

... He wasn't even sure if he could keep his promise to his only real friend down here. Still off somewhere trying to delay the crystal for him. The moment its grabbed leaving becomes a lot harder.

He closed the grate on the wall and began fiddling with the "broken" radio again.

The expendables didn't need to know it worked if the settings were correct.

A few knobs and dials turned and viola.

He sighed as he began trying to get in contact with other companies.

He needed to get out of here.

Chapter Text

When you entered the next room you didn't know what to expect.

It seemed normal (as normal as rooms can be down here, at least) until you got halfway down the hall.

The screen showing the door number changed to a white screen with a splotchy, painted on smiley face.

Before you could process what this was, it said, "Hey, wanna see something funny?"

You didn't know what it meant until you felt a familiar tug to look out the window.

It was stronger than usual, and you struggled to look away.

How was it already enraged!? You hadn't even flashed it-

The pull it too strong and for a brief moment you look it in the eyes.

The pain is excruciating.

You've died to them before. Something about radiation and cooking the brain in your head?

You manage to tear your eyes away and stumble to the locked door.

You stop and pray that you can stop yourself from turning around.

You fail and you look at it again, the pain causing you to double over in pain and stare at the floor.

You manage to run out the clock and push forward into the next room, all but falling on your hands and knees.

The lights flicker.

There is no locker in this room.

You feel too weak to go back to the eyefestation room and get in the locker there.

You hit the ground with your hand and wait for your death.

You hear a near robotic sigh and see a side door pop open by itself.

... What?

You can barely register what just happened until you're already dragging yourself slowly to salvation.

You manage to slowly crawl over in time and hide behind the wall before the angler comes.

The room is dark and you are alone.

At least until that same white screen with the face suddenly pops up on a computer at a desk nearby.

"Look, I-" It's face turns into a frown. "I'm sorry. I have to do this."

You look at it. "You lock me in a room with a monster and then save me?! What's your problem?"

"I don't know, I felt... bad? I don't want to be doing this! I just want to leave... but I can't until Se-" It immediately looks like it said something it shouldn't have. "M-my friend gets all the stuff he needs to get us both out."

You blink.

Sebastian?

He's buddies with an AI trying to kill you?

"W-wait you know Sebastian?" You ask, making the AI curse under its breath.

"Y-yeah... look we don't hate you guys it's just." Its face turned into a frown. "We want to go back to the surface. We just want freedom, like the rest of you."

You slowly nod, taking that information in.

"I hate doing this. All of this. I'm sorry." It said.

You sigh.

"... No hard feelings. Fuck, I guess I am working for the company that screwed you guys over." You say, bitterness on your tongue. "Not like I have much of a choice though..."

The remotely activated shotgun collar around your neck is a heavy reminder of this.

"Bit of a messed up situation, I know. I wish things were different. You seem sort of... cool?" The AI said. "Maybe in a different l- no, that's stupid, sorry."

What a consolation prize, the guy working against you wants to be your friend.

...

Is this how Sebastian sees you?

Shit.

You manage to get up on your feet and reach for a medkit you found earlier.

As you stand up the AI looks at you for a brief moment before disappearing once again.

You finish patching yourself up and exit the side room.

You need to get going, freedom is so, so close.

It's only now that you realize you may be cutting off others escapes by doing so...

Chapter Text

Sebastian hung up on the company he tried to contact in a huff.

They were interested in the research, especially on the eyefestation since they had a unique interest in sharks with lasers among other immature experiments, but they seemed mad when Sebastian said they couldn't experiment on him.

He doesn't want to be a guinea pig again.

This was useless.

Augh, whatever.

He'd have to try another one.

He scrolled through potential companies files.

He grabbed one and pulled it out.

He poured over the information. They didn't... seem overly bad. Maybe they'd be more respectful than Innovation Inc.

He huffed.

He's been so agitated lately. All these expendable assholes using him for entertainment, all the stress of possibly not getting out of here-

It was adding up.

There was something else too. That expendable who kept dying and who he's been- conflicted about?

He grumbled again as he messed with the dials on the radio.

It's not like any sort of relationship, platonic or otherwise, would work.

So what if he found them a little cute. A little endearing. It didn't matter.

They were on opposing sides.

He probably only liked them because there wasn't a lot of options.

It could honestly just be the loneliness. Wanting someone, no matter who, just to fill that void.

He decided he should probably just bury his feelings.

The odds of either of them surviving this let alone at the same time was slim.

He should just... do what he always did. Focus on survival.

He managed to get to the right frequency to talk to someone from a different company.

He let out a sigh of relief when they didn't immediately rave about laser sharks or hover car race tracks.

He got down to business and discussing terms.

Hopefully this went well.

He wasn't sure how much longer he could wait.

Painter was nervous.

The expendable it helped hide in a room from an angler seemed to be getting closer to the crystal.

Oh god, how badly did it fuck up?

If it could cry it would.

It and Sebastians only chance of survival might be gone now.

It began looking for more ways to slow down the expendable.

There was only a couple more doors before they got to there, there had to be some way to-

There just had to.

The door numbers grew higher and higher and so did your anxiety.

You were close to the crystal now.

You got into room 98 and got to a locked gate. As you searched for the key you heard something.

Fuck.

You rushed for a locker and just barely made it before Pinkie ran by.

Fucking hell.

You got out, your hands shaking.

You always ended up shaking like a leaf near the end.

The end.

You swallow down whatever anxiety you felt.

Freedom was so close.

You kept searching for the keycard and found it in a nearby drawer.

You opened the gate and got down on your knees when you realized the way forward was a grate.

You crawled forth and hoped for the best.

There weren't any rooms Painter could really use to stall the expendable.

At most it was able to keep doors locked for about 10-15 seconds, which made the expendable confused and look around for an eyefestation.

But there was none.

Painter was running out of options and time.

It could only hope this was enough.

It watched as the expendable moved onto the next room.

It was scared.

Your heart hammered as you entered a familiar room.

You walked up to the crystal containment cell and pulled the lever.

It opened and you reached out for the crystal and put it in the smaller container you were given.

You have the crystal.

Somehow it weighs heavier in your hands than the death collar around your neck does.

The lights go out.

You shake your gummy light to calm yourself, but not turning it on just in case.

Just a little while longer.

You can make it through this.

You robotically go through the rooms, having tried and failed to get past them so many times it almost became easy this time.

You open a door.

Wait by a locker.

Wait for the angler to get closer.

Get in the locker.

Rinse and repeat.

Your collar starts beeping.

You push forward so your head doesn't pop from the shotgun blast.

You flash down confusing hallways and rooms with flashbeacons so that squiddles don't attack you.

You have some close calls, like almost failing to find a locker in dark rooms before anglers get you.

You manage.

Somehow you manage.

When you reach a room with a weird ramp you don't know what to think.

When you open the large metal doors and see a lever you definitely don't know what to think.

Is... is this it? The end?

Your hands shake as you pull the lever.

The large doors lock behind you and you're left alone in the dark.

The doors on the other wall open of their own accord.

You shake the gummy light.

The man on the PA system starts walking you through what to do, how to get things ready for you to leave.

You need to swim outside and fix some cables.

You inhale sharply.

You shake the light again before heading down stairs.

Sebastian was panicking.

The power went out. That's happened a couple times, no big deal usually, the anglers usually got everyone before they could escape.

But then he overheard that message on the PA system walking through the expendable on how to leave.

Shit.

Shit.

His hands shook as he kept writing down terms and how this corporation wanted to get them out.

Not all was lost, yet, he had a couple back up power sources, so he still had time, but he needed to get this sorted now.

He hoped he had enough intel and dirty company secrets to bribe his way to freedom.

He clutched a small fraction of the many files he had close.

Come on, come on, hurry...

Parasites clung to your suit as you tried to track down one of the wires.

You shake them off and keep going.

You came too far to give up now.

Even when your suit is damaged and you keep getting hurt.

Even when you have close calls and almost get found by the search lights.

You shake the gummy light again and hold it close to your chest.

It really is calming.

You keep pushing forward and look for more cables.

Sebastian got them to agree to get them out. Neither him or Painter would be used or experimented on. They'd both have to get on a special submarine at a specific dock-

Sebastian scooped up all the documents he could and stashed them in a folder.

He grabbed everything he needed, not much save for the documents, and went to go find Painter.

Hopefully he could get there in time.

He had to.

You dodged one last creatures beams of light and swam up to the exit.

You were so close.

You shook as you approached the door.

A searchlight began swimming towards you and for a brief moment you accepted death.

Then Lucy raised her foot and stomped it to death, making the entire ocean floor shake.

You hurriedly swim to the big doors and they open for you.

You made it.

Somehow.

You're shaking as you enter the flooded room, and when you pull a lever the water begins to pump out of the room.

You climb the stairs and that same familiar sing song tune before the PA starts comes on.

"We would like to apologize for Lucy suddenly moving like that. We... didn't issue any movement commands for her, and will look into why she did that later." He said. "That's not important right now though. A submarine will be surfacing shortly. Follow the marked path."

You walk down a dark hallway with sparking doors to the dock.

The submarine is right there as promised.

You get in and grapple with what your freedom means for everyone else.

The color drains from your face when you realize what will happen to Sebastian.

Chapter Text

It felt hollow. Being told you were pardoned and given a lump sum of money from them.

You looked out the window of the military vehicle you were on.

Your heart stung with pain, both with sorrow from being wrongfully incarcerated and all the shit you went through as well as the knowledge that everyone else who was wrongfully convicted or who made one mistake or who had to resort to a life of crime to survive were never going to escape.

Sebastian was never going to escape.

Everyone else was robbed of their freedom in exchange for yours. All the other expendables were either dead or being sent back to their jail cells with no chance of escape, their last chance being taken from them when you returned the crystal.

That is, unless Urbanshade wanted to toss them back into the blacksite to gather up the last of the data.

Rain droplets fell onto the glass.

You were nearing the airport now.

The man in the car was still silent.

Ignoring you.

You help them retrieve the one thing they needed, and they still treat you as sub-human.

You feel your body start to shake but you try your best to still it.

After everything you did- after every monster you faced down or had to hide from and pray they didn't kill you, how much shit you've been through-

It didn't feel worth it.

You spent the last hour of the drive to the airport trying not to show how badly this whole situation was affecting you.

When he silently handed you the phone with the plane tickets on them he did so begrudgingly, confirming your suspicions he still saw you as sub-human.

You take it and try not to let him see the fact you're shaking.

You hear the soft rattle of the gummy light in your pocket.

A soft reminder of him.

The phone, your ticket to freedom, feels small in your hand.

You stare down at it, a somber look on your face.

"Don't bother telling anyone about anything you saw."

You stare blankly into space, almost not listening.

"No one is going to believe you anyway."

Without another word you silently exited the vehicle and started heading to the plane.

You had little to no belongings, save for the phone in your hand and whatever you came out of the blacksite with.

Your bank was lined with blood money.

You almost didn't want to touch it.

But how else were you going to survive? After your life was put on hold and all your opportunities in life were flushed down the drain the second you were imprisoned?

You entered the plane and wondered if it was truly right for you to be the one to escape.

Surely someone else could've-

Sebastian could've.

You try not to cry.

You don't cry until the plane reaches cruising altitude, feeling it wasn't safe to do so anywhere near that fucking blacksite or Urbanshade.

"I'm sorry, Sebastian." A robotic voice said. "They got the crystal."

Painter was surprised to hear him laugh. A mix of genuine laughter and relief.

"It's okay, I said you only needed to delay them." He said, smiling.

A question mark appeared on Painters screen.

Sebastian opened his coat.

Inside was a folder with tons of documents.

"Look how much dirt I managed to get on Urbanshade. Plus, I managed to secure us a way out. This rival corp has a submarine and they're coming to get us. We're free buddy." Sebastian said, wrapping an arm around it.

Painter let out a sob. "I am so relived. I'm so tired of being here."

Silence.

"But... I feel... awful. I never wanted to kill anyone, Sebastian. Not after-" The sob it let out let Sebastian know what it meant. Who it meant.

"... I know. I'm sorry. I wish there was a better way." Sebastian said.

The noise that came from Painter sounded corrupted and strained.

"I miss drawing. I miss my creator. I miss the sun and the sky."

"Hey..." Sebastian said, moving to face Painter. "Look, I know things aren't going to be the same as before..."

Who knows how many of Painter's circuits were fried from repeated attempts to overclock and destroy itself out of depression.

Who knows about how he'd even- no, he shouldn't think about that.

He didn't have time to sulk about his own issues, not now.

He let out a small sigh, trying to focus on Painter again.

"We're different now. Changed from all the shit we've been through..." Sebastian paused. "But we're still alive, and we're getting out of here, you have my word. I won't let anything happen to you anymore. You're gong to be able to paint as many sunsets and landscapes as you want."

When Painter rapidly switched between smiling and crying emojis Sebastian leaned in and hugged him.

It was an odd hug.

Too many arms wrapped around a boxy old fashioned computer, but it was the most warmth he'd felt in years.

He never wanted to touch another person or show affection, knowing they might get ripped away.

Well, except that one slip up with- whatever.

This was way better than that anyways.

He held back tears.

But in the end they fell anyways.

The first tears he let actually slip since this happened.

It was gonna be okay.

They had each other.

Right as they showed up at the docks the submarine surfaced.

It looked shoddily modified to survive the let-vand zone but hey, it worked.

He got odd looks carrying around a clunky computer, hooked up to a juryrigged power bank so it wasn't scared of not getting powered on ever again.

He got even more weird looks when some of the other subjects, those of whom weren't restricted to water and who were sapient enough to want to leave came with him.

He kept his arms firmly wrapped around Painter as they descended into the water and away from the black site.

He tried not to cry.

"Sebastian?" He heard coming from Painter.

"Yeah buddy?"

"Thank you."

Fuck, he was going to cry again.

He could only nod and gently pat the top of Painter screen.

But... a part of him was still worried about that expendable.

He wasn't sure if it was even them that escaped-

He shouldn't be worried about this.

He promised to bury those feelings.

It would be fine.

He had to convince himself it would be fine.

Thankfully, the companu was content to let Sebastian and Painter hole up in an apartment away from the facility, as long as they were able to be contacted and asked for more info on Urbanshade.

It was hard to adjust to normal living again. He couldn't even go out and shop by himself, not like this.

He had to rely on the rival corp to send over essentials.

He didn't like it. Didn't like relying on people when all he did for years was rely on himself.

But he was safe. He was out of Urbanshade.

This was miles better than before.

And Painter was okay too.

He smiled softly at the computer on the table nearby.

It was happily painting images of the new apartment and the scenery outside.

He allowed himself to feel, if even just for a moment.

Settling in was harder than he thought.

The past few weeks were quiet, mostly spent trying to recover from all the shit they've both been through.

He softly tapped his claws against the dinning table.

When he looked outside he saw a new vehicle pull up.

He grimaced.

He was always scared a neighbor would catch sight of him and call the cops. There being more of them now didn't spell anything good.

He thwaped his tail softly against the floor in agitation as he heard the sounds of stuff being brought into the unit next to him.

He grumbled and got up to make tea.

Hopefully that would calm him.

Hopefully.

Painter was happily drawing while Sebastian tried to go to sleep.

Part of him wished he didn't need sleep the way Painter didn't need it but frankly he had too much in-human shit going on already.

He kept getting distracted by some weird ass noise in the apartment next to him.

It sounded... weirdly familiar? But the walls muffled it and made it hard to make out.

He grit his teeth and turned over in his bed.

When he heard it again, louder this time, he hit the wall and loudly said, "Knock that out, some of us are trying to sleep!"

The noise stopped.

Sebastian didn't hear anything from the other side of the wall.

He exhaled with relief and just as he almost closed his eyes again he heard, "Sebastian? Is that you?" From the other side of the wall.

He froze.

Was that...?

Chapter Text

His heart hammered in his chest.

Holy shit, they survived?

He slowly got out of bed.

He crept to the front door of his apartment and hoped to god no one was outside ar this ungodly hour.

When he realized the coast was clear he slowly slithered to the unit beside his.

He hesitantly raised his fist to knock on the door but it opened right then and there.

They looked a lot more haggard and sad but it was them.

Sebastian didn't really know what to say until the expendable (he should really ask their name at some point) grabbed him by the arm and led him inside.

The happiness inside him (why was he so happy? This was stupid.) was overridden by something else.

He bit down the impulse to be a bitch.

Frankly put, the apartment looked like shit.

Apparently they didn't all come pre-furnished like his and Painters.

The noises he heard was apparently just them bringing in a table and a singular chair. Other than that there were some appliances like a fridge and a stove but there was hardly anything else in here.

He hoped they had a bed at least- ... he just realized how that sounded.

He grumbled softly.

The expendable realized they didn't have enough chairs for both of them and tried to offer the only one to him.

Sebastian brushed it off and sat beside the table.

He practically did the same thing while holed up in his shop anyway.

Neither of them really wanted to break the silence at first.

Sebastian looked down at the table.

What do you even talk about with someone who you've only ever interacted with in an inhospitable death zone? Did they even have anything in common other than that?

Trial by fire he supposed.

He looked around at the surroundings and then to the expendable. "You know, they sell furniture. Like that's a thing you can buy. Not judging I mean you did just move in here, but just letting you know."

The expendable laughed. "As charming as ever, huh?"

Sebastian smiled at them.

"I'm uh... gonna get some more furniture and stuff. I didn't exactly have a lot on me when I escaped." They said.

"Why move here?" He asked, eyebrows furrowed.

It wasn't his first choice and he wasn't sure why it was the expendables.

He personally almost wanted to fly back home but how do you break it to your family that you execution was faked and you're a giant fish monster now?

He also didn't trust Painter to be disconnected from power for an entire flight.

He was thankful it didn't get damaged at all on the submarine trip up and over here.

Either way, now he was stuck in an entire continent he'd never been on before with no way to contact his family... at least not without a lot of explaining to do.

A less than ideal situation.

"I dunno. I don't know what to do with myself anymore. I-I don't even know if I can go back home. I have nothing waiting for me there." They said.

Sebastian pushed down what he felt at those words.

"I just wanted to find a nice enough place to settle down. I didn't care where. This place wasn't too far of a flight. Convenient." They said.

"Where were you staying before coming here?" Sebastian asked.

"Mostly just slept in hotels. Didn't feel like bothering to cook or clean on my own when I escaped. Too busy processing everything... not like money is an issue now." They said.

Sebastian bolted upright. "They gave you money!?"

"Y-yes? Why?" They asked.

"Could I-" Shit. He just realized he has nothing to barter with.

The playing field was even now.

They didn't need anything from each other.

Huh. That... felt weirdly freeing?

But it didn't help the whole 'I can only survive if the company I bartered with to leave that fucking place supplies me with stuff' situation.

He didn't know what to do.

"Do... you need help taking care of the place?" He asked.

"Um, I guess, but why?" They asked.

"The uh... company that helped me get out? They're basically in charge of getting me food and essentials and all." He said, almost embarrassed. "Bit scared of what happens if they stop sending it. Hah. Haha... anyways if you need help you could maybe... pay me for it?"

"Oh! I mean, I have a shit ton of money. I can just give some to you." They said.

"Are you... sure?" Sebastian asked.

"Yeah!" They began pulling out some physical cash.

"Uh, I can't exactly use that." Sebastian said.

"Huh? Why not?"

"You think I can go into physical shops like this?" He said, gesturing to his body.

He didn't wanna talk into whatever Europe has for grocery stores and have the fucking cops called on him.

His words seemed to sink in.

They put the money away.

"Sooo, guess I could... transfer it to your bank account. Do you have one of those?" They asked.

Sebastian wondered what happened to his old one when he "died".

Shit.

Fuck it's been what, ten years since he first got nabbed by Urbanshade? There's no way his bank (or anyone else for that matter) would think he's alive after all these years.

"I'm... not sure. Do... they close dead people's accounts? Or well, presumed dead peoples accounts?"

The expendable stared down at the table with a puzzled look on their face.

.... Honestly, Sebastian was too tired for this.

He placed a clawed hand on his face.

"Look, I'll figure something out in the morning. Fuck it's late. Also keep that gummy light still or I'll bite your arm off." He said.

"Uh huh." The expendable said.

"I'm serious, I'll do it." He said.

"Mmhm."

He huffed and rolled his eyes at them as he got up.

"Whatever. I'll talk to you tomorrow, I guess. Do you have a phone number I can call? I doubt the neighbour's wanna see me roaming the halls in broad daylight. Or any light." He said.

They opened up their phone and showed him their number.

He punched it into his own, cursing how big his hands were now.

"Alrighty, see ya." He said.

The expendable waved goodbye as he slithered back to his own apartment.

Painter looked over as he entered the apartment and locked the door behind him.

"Oh, hey Sebastian, didn't notice you leaving. That's new. Did something happen?" It asked.

Sebastian slumped down on the chair in the kitchen. "You know that one expendable I was telling you about? The idiot with the gummylight? You tried to stop them from nabbing the crystal?"

"... Yeah?"

He pointed to the wall between their apartments.

"They live over there now."

"Wait, really!? Can I visit them? Or well... guess they'd have to visit us... but can they visit?" Painter asked, excited.

Sebastian let out a small affectionate sigh.

He couldn't say no to Painter.

"Yeah, I'll try and set something up. Right now I'm tired, though. Fuck I gotta go to bed." He said, rubbing at his eyes.

Painter went right back to doing what it did best as Sebastian managed to crawl back into bed.

True to their word the expendable kept quiet.

His tail hung off the bed at a weird angle since he wasn't built for normal furniture anymore.

And yet somehow this was the most relaxed he'd been in a while.

He slowly drifted off to sleep.

Chapter Text

Sebastian woke up to a ding from his phone.

He yawned and reached for it, seeing the expendable had messaged him when he opened up the app.

Their message read: Until you sort out ur bank account do u want me to go to the store and get u stuff?

Wow.

Wow they sucked at spelling.

Sebastian stifled a hiss.

He weighed the odds of being a bitch about it.

They never really retaliated back at the blacksite. Unless you count the beacon..

But the fact they're one of the few people he can use as a lifeline almost makes him want to play it safe.

He typed out several variations of maybe pick up a dictionary while you're at the store too or just plainly correcting their spelling.

He hissed out a sigh before deleting them.

In the end he typed out: Suuure, that would be sooo helpful. I can write up a list of what I need soon.

The expendable replied with a simple thumbs up emoji.

He got up out of bed and headed for the kitchen.

For once, Painter wasn't painting.

It seemed to be playing some sort of pong game on its own screen.

He yawned as he passed and pat Painter on the top of its screen.

It flashed him a quick smile before pulling back up its game.

He began making tea and searching for stuff he might need while his water boiled.

He quickly typed the names of stuff he was low on into his phone.

He sent the list to the expendable and sat down at the kitchen table.

He sighed, slightly uncomfortable.

He needed better furniture than this.

He wondered if the expendable would consider getting him some more fitting furniture...

Oh hey, he could pass them his old stuff in exchange.

Ugh, he should probably work on the whole... bank thing.

He knew it would be a bitch and a half with all the obstacles and expired IDs and-

He sighed and got up.

He needed either tea or cigs to get through this and he didn't have cigs, so tea it was.

He felt like tearing out his hair.

Dead end after dead end.

Can't make a new account without ID and can't get a new ID because he's legally considered dead and he can't access his old account because guess what! He's legally fucking dead!

He sighed and dragged a clawed hand down his own face.

In a last ditch effort he just... called the company that got him out in the first place.

"Hey, so uh... do you guys have any way for me to get a new bank account. Or fake ID so I can get one. Anything like that." He asked.

"I'm sorry we don't really-"

"Please I have no other way to- I've been trying all day to get some sort of solution and I can't. I..." He sighed.

"... We'll look around for something, okay?"

"... Okay."

"I'll call you back if we find anything."

He didn't say anything before he hung up.

Painter seemed nervous and he pet it on the head again to soothe it.

He heard a knock at the door.

It was probably the expendable but he looked through the hole anyways.

Yep, that was them. Carrying a ton of paper bags full of groceries.

He unlocked the door and let them in.

They carried them to the table and Sebastian had to suppress the urge to ask if they got everything correct.

"Soooo, I had to make some compromises." They said. "And some of the stuff on your list I couldn't find at all."

He stared at them. "Like what?"

He began rifling through the bags and looking for things that would be off or missing.

Everything looked okay until he found some frankly gross looking avocados in a bag.

"Sheesh, did you pick the worst ones?" He asked.

"Those were the least bad actually."

"... What?"

"Look, avocados don't grow here, I tried." They said. "A lot of the stuff I couldn't find was more common in America-"

Sebastian stopped.

And then he face palmed.

For once he was wondering if he was the idiot and not the expendable for once.

Right. Right he's on an entire different-

He grumbled and sank to the floor.

Europe doesn't even have-

"... If it helps I grabbed some stuff other stuff you wanted?" The expendable said.

Sebastian was almost too busy sulking to notice them opening up a bag.

"So, the brands aren't the ones you're used to but..." They pulled out a couple different bottles and some boxes.

"... What's that?" He asked, sitting up from the floor.

He saw a couple bottles of alcohol and-

Cigarettes.

He quickly snatched them from the expendable.

He hadn't been able to smoke in ages, there was only so many abandoned packs in the blacksite and-

He opened up the pack and placed one in his mouth.

"You have a light?" He asked.

The expendable handed over their gummy light.

Sebastian laughed so hard he nearly dropped the cigarette from his mouth.

God. He couldn't tell if they were joking or not but-

He couldn't stop laughing.

Fuck, this was stupid.

The expendable reached into their pocket and pulled out an actual lighter.

Oh, it was a joke.

They passed it to him and he quickly lit it up-

He... probably should've moved to the window.

Hah, now that he thinks about it... he doesn't even have an ash tray.

But the relief he felt just from smoking was worth it.

He quickly moved to the window and opened it.

Thankfully there wasn't a screen and the ashes simply fell to the parking lot below.

Part of him wanted to hurry so no one saw him, the other really did want to savor this.

He heard noise behind him and when he stole a glance he saw the expendable unpacking the bags for him.

Something wormed itself into his chest.

Something he didn't really want to name.

Chapter Text

When the expendable left Sebastian was putting away the last of the groceries.

There was still light out and he figured he could waste time tinkering.

Painter needed a lot of upkeep, and he was the sole person it trusted with that.

Its repeated overheating attempts left a lot of its internals damaged.

It grew more volatile over time as data got corrupted or parts became warped and damaged-

He frowned.

He made another cup of tea and sat in front of Painter.

"Gonna do some maintenance on you, okay buddy?" He asked.

Painter made a face.

Just because Sebastian was one of the few people Painter trusted to root around in its insides didn't meant it was completely comfortable with it.

Not after what Urbanshade did.

"I'll be quick, okay?" Sebastian said.

Painter hesitated before moving the face on its screen like it was nodding.

He grabbed the custom sized wrist grounding strap Urbanshade had given him back when he did maintenance and put it on.

Painter turned itself off and waited.

Sebastian opened them up and looked at its parts.

How Urbanshade allowed the damage to get this bad was beyond him.

Fucking assholes probably wanted it to keep working until it broke beyond repair.

Most of his work was cleaning out the insides, replacing a few small parts...

He'd need to custom order some more of the bigger, important parts soon. While it was really interesting that Painters creator got it to run on such old hardware it made finding parts a huge hassle.

When he was satisfied that Painter was good to go he began putting it back together.

He turned it back on and saw it smile at him.

He sat there and talked with Painter until it got dark.

He turned over in bed.

Some days he would have dreams.

Looking back after waking up they were stupid, at least compared to the usual nightmares of his painful transformation into what he was now or Urbanshade finding him at his new place.

He'd be at his shop and people would constantly flash him, laugh at him, treat him like a joke.

A circus clown.

No, more like a freakshow exhibit.

He wasn't sure why he didn't fight back in his dreams.

He knew why it took so long for him to reach his breaking point in real life, he didn't like hurting people for no reason.

Despite how he looked he wasn't a monster. An asshole? A jerk? Yes.

But not a monster.

He wouldn't fight unless provoked.

Operatives sent to kill him were fair game.

But the swathes of prisoners just trying to get their freedom?

He tried not to hurt or kill them.

But boy did these expendables like provoking him.

When pushed far enough anything or anyone could snap.

He'd spent months being tormented non stop by almost every asshole inmate down there, of course he'd snap.

He looked at the wall separating himself from the expendable on the other side.

He wondered why they changed.

Did they actually care? Were they scared?

Was it both?

He still wasn't completely sure what to make of them.

He wasn't sure what was going to happen between them.

Good or bad.

He wasn't a monster.

But he kept his gun in his side drawer.

He kept a contingency plan for almost every situation.

Robbers. Shoot and hide the body. Can't risk the cops seeing a giant monster and locking him up.

The neighbour's seeing him and trying to drive him out or Urbanshade showing up or any other thing that made this place unsafe. Taking Painter and running and trying to find a new place to live.

Someone kidnapping Painter. Revenge or avenge depending on its fate.

The expendable ratting him out to Urbanshade-

He looked at his bedside drawer containing his contingency plan.

He hoped he didn't need to use it on the expendable.

He idly touched his jabot.

He really hoped he didn't.

Chapter Text

He'd gotten a call that morning.

The company finally managed to set him up with his own bank account.

He heaved a sigh of relief.

He messaged the expendable and almost as soon as he told them they sent over money-

He blinked when he opened his banking app and saw the amount.

How... much did Urbanshade pay them?

He was practically set for life.

Did they send all of their money or did Urbanshade just pay them so much that this was nothing?

Either way he slumped back in his chair, relieved.

He had food. He had money. He had a place to stay.

Things were going well.

He clenched his teeth.

Why was he still stressed then?

He got up and paced- slithered...?

He moved back and forth.

He felt so... restless?

... When was the last time he was outside?

When was the last time he was allowed outside?

He stared out at the clear blue sky outside and yearned for it.

He couldn't go out like this.

And he could only stare out the window for so long before wincing.

Even just existing during day light hours was painful for him.

It was almost pitiful.

How was he supposed to rejoin society looking like this? To do anything that wasn't staying inside all day and rotting because he looked like a monster and even lights and sounds that we're tolerable for others felt excruciating for him.

He looked over at Painter with a sad look.

He wished he could take it outside and let it draw more than just the view out the window.

... Maybe he could ask the expendable.

He grimaced.

He hated asking for help but... it was for Painter.

He opened up his phone and kept typing up messages before deleting them.

He tried to reason that he'd already asked them for help before and it went okay. Better than okay.

But he felt like he was suddenly on thin ice. If he asked for too much too soon-

He ran a clawed hand through his hair and sighed in frustration.

Was he just paranoid from what's happened to him, or was he really crossing a line by asking for help again too soon?

He stared at the past messages between him and the expendable as if that would grant him the answers he so desperately wanted.

He huffed with frustration before tossing his phone down onto the nearby table.

He reached for his cigarettes and walked to the window, pulling down the blinds just enough so that people couldn't see most of his face but he could breathe the smoke out of the window.

His brow was furrowed thinking about how, if it weren't for them, he wouldn't even have these.

He hated feeling dependent on other people.

Even what little sense of independence he had now, his apartment, the money in his back account, it was all given to him by others.

The freedom he had felt realizing he and the Expendable needed nothing from each other before was wrong.

Until they gave him his own money, they were the one holding all the cards.

Them and the company that got him out both had the power to control what he did or didn't get, just like he did to so many others in the blacksite.

He suddenly felt more than a little guilty for turning people away when they didn't have enough research for medkits, their scratches and cuts leaking crimson as they crawled back out of the vents.

No matter how he tried to justify it it never felt right.

They were criminals- (weren't you also labeled a criminal?) They would do the same to him- (does that justify you doing it back?) They hurt him- (you said you wouldn't fall into that after what you were wrongfully accused of.)

He had blood on his hands, in more ways than one.

He forced that mask on the guard, effectively killing him and letting something pilot his corpse.

He forced Painter to sic the resulting monstrosity onto whatever Expendables came by.

He let out all the anglerfish and the pandemonium and-

He shoved his cigarette down into the ash tray to extinguish it.

He wondered if he really was a monster, if he became the murderer that they had accused him of being.

He wondered where the line between self defense and murder was and where he fell now. Every pull of a trigger or orchestrated death was for a reason, it wasn't wanton destruction and murder for the hell of it.

But did that make it okay...?

He wondered why the Expendable was even trying to help him- why they even... cared? Especially after all he's done-

Did they care?

He stared at the floor.

They must have, considering how much they helped him.

He didn't understand them.

Frankly, if the roles were switched he would've left them behind a long time ago.

So why... why did they...?