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"Yeah well, fuck!" Jiang Wanyin groaned before banging his head against the wooden desk underneath him. His brother laughed in a not-so-very apologetic manner before giving Jiang Cheng a hard pat on the back.
"It's not so bad my dear brother. You're just starring as Juliet in our school's yearly play with Lan Xichen--your academic rival--who's Romeo."
Jiang Wanyin wailed from the desk and promptly shouted in agony of having to perform with Lan Xichen.
"That's exactly the fucking point dickhead." The latter replied and Wei Wuxian smiled. "This is your chance to get closer to him. I know he's your rival and shit, but don't act like you haven't been crushing on him since the moment you literally met him."
"Fuck you." The younger man grabbed his stuff without a thought as the last bell rang and left his brother behind. His dear brother, Wei Wuxian had this deluded fantasy that Jiang Cheng had a crush on Lan Xichen. Jiang Cheng thought it was utterly stupid. He did not like Lan Xichen. Not a single bit. In fact, he loathed the older man, and the other did the same. Of course there were moments were he found himself staring at the other man and when he was promptly forced back into reality he would slap himself back to the Jiang Cheng who loathed the Lan.
Auditioning for the play was not a part of his plans. Yes, he was a theater geek to an extent. But his usual plays would be planned by him or if he was acting in it, it would be something fairly logical. This was romance---Romeo and Juliet, the so called "greatest romance in history" when really it was just to deluded 13 year old's. But this time, Lan Xichen decided to audition. The guy wasn't even remotely interest in theater yet he did audition. So naturally, as his academic rival he had to do so as well. Jiang Cheng had hoped that with his experience with theater, he would get a better role than Lan Xichen---or better yet...Lan Xichen wouldn't even get a role.
But that clearly didn't work out for him since he was now the Juliet to Lan Xichen's Romeo.
"Fuck that bastard and his big fucking ego." The Jiang cursed as he swiftly moved through the crowds of people huddled along the hallways. It annoyed him as much to see little icks standing in a circle in the middle of the hallway, blocking his way from going to his next class. Fuck them and their stupid fucking conversations too. To make matters worse, Lan Xichen was one of the little icks too. Every time Jiang Cheng would pass the older man in the hallway he would look away from his little circle of friends to give him a look that made Jiang Cheng shiver.
Jiang Cheng quickly took a look at his watch before pushing the doors to the school theater open. Theater was the last thing he had to do for the day and he was good to head home.
"A-Cheng! You're here. I was just about to send someone to look for you." Mr. Yang, the play director, shouted out to him from the stage and Jiang Cheng gave a quick smile.
Mr. Yang was great. He was–really. Although he was a bit weird in ways, he was a kind soul and Jiang Cheng would go as far as saying he was his favorite teacher. But now, he utterly hates him for making Lan Xichen—out of all people—Romeo when he knew that Jiang Cheng hated him. But nevertheless, it is what it is and all Jiang Cheng could hope for now was that the script was at least halfway decent and that there were no — explicitly intimate scenes they had to play.
Jiang Cheng would rather die and stay dead than even breathe near Lan Xichen.
His eyes met Lan Xichen's and immediately frowned at the impassiveness of it. That's another reason why Jiang Cheng hated Lan Xichen. Sometimes he would look over at him and his eyes would be devoid of any emotion just like his stupid brother Lan Wangji. But as much as Jiang Cheng hated the Lan brothers, he had some sort of resect for only Lan Wangji. After all the younger jade was dating Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng could never understand how one could date an ass like his brother but here they were. Lan Xichen---could never.
Jiang Cheng made his way over to the stage where the crew and cast were lined up and he stood next to Lan Xichen as that was the blocking for assembly--something that Jiang Cheng thought that stupid--and listened as Yang reminded them of all the instructions and reminders that they needed to do their first run through of the play.
Most of the cast had received the script a week in advance of their first practice. It was not uncommon to run out of scripts while handing them out so some minor characters wouldn't receive scripts until the new order had arrived---which was today.
Jiang Cheng had been late that day and had not received a script, hence not knowing what would happen. He could have just asked someone, but he was not friends with anyone from this play and the one person he knew---would be the last person on earth that he would ask.
As soon as Mr. Yang had finished giving out his instructions for the day, the cast and crew began to shuffle to their places. Today would just be a little run through of the play, as far as they could get, just so everyone was comfortable with what was going on. As soon as he was handed the script, Jiang Cheng--off the bat--wanted to die.
He looked up at his teacher in horror and Mr. Yang gave him and Lan Xichen a reassuring nod.
"It's your chance to get over this childish feud of yours. Your already in your senior year of college Xichen and you in your junior, A-Cheng. Don't you think it's time that you two get past your differences and make a truce?" Mr. Yang winked and Jiang Cheng winced. Yep. Minus points for him.
He turned to find a grinning Lan Xichen and internally vomited. Lan Xichen's smile grew wider when he saw the "Fuck you" eyes that Jiang Cheng was throwing at him. Annoying the younger boy was quite fun at times. Especially in public when Jiang Cheng pretended to be calm around other people.
Jiang Cheng was anything but calm.
"Ok, kids! Let's sit in a circle, we're going to read through the whole script today and if we have left over time...you'll socialize and make yourself useful. We're starting run through's tomorrow."
Jiang Cheng shuffled into his spot next to Lan Xichen uncomfortably and shivered every time his knee brushed Lan Xichens. But he truly wasn't uncomfortable. Jiang Cheng had the intense urge to move closer...to cuddle into the warm body next to him.
He had never felt like this before.
He flipped the script to the first page and glanced through the lines, of all roles he could have gotten -- he ended up with Juliet.
(A/N: just me forgetting how boring the script for Romeo and Juliet actually is cuz I just went to find the copy I used in high school.)
As Jiang Cheng read his lines he also read the stage directions and actions.
They kiss.
They hug.
They kiss.
They hug.
Juliet is carried.
Jiang Cheng wanted to die. Mr. Yang would never let them not do this. Kissing Lan Xichen -- touching Lan Xichen was the last thing that Jiang Cheng anticipated. But suddenly the near thought didn't seem too bad. In fact, Jiang Cheng could see Lan Xichen pressing him against an empty corridor, his hot mouth against his own....kissing him senseless while Jiang Cheng writhed impatiently underneath him.
"A-Cheng!" A loud voice broke him from his trance and Jiang Cheng looked up startled.
"Yeah?"
"Are you ok? You were in a trance." Mr. Yang prompted and Jiang Cheng nodded. "I'm fine. I was just thinking about how we'll act everything out."
Mr. Yang sent Jiang Cheng a look—clearly not believing what he just said.
"Well we won't start rehearsing anything until tomorrow so you might as well start focusing on the script ahead of you."
jiang Cheng blushed a deep red. He could feel Lan Xichen quiver with laughter next to him and a sudden rush of anger hit him.
"Fuck you Lan Xichen." He muttered under his breath but he was sure that Lan Xichen heard it judging by the way his body shook.
Resisting the urge to punch the boy next to him, Jiang Cheng flipped through the pages of his script skimming through it as everyone else did so as well. His eyes flitted over to Lan Xichen's hands as he flipped through his own script. For a split second his thoughts went south. He bit his lip as he wondered how it would feel to be stretched out by his long fingers. Jiang Cheng knew his own hands did nothing much. Compared to his own, Lan Xichen's arms were much bigger. He was bigger than most people here. The boy himself was a giant---truly. He certainly came from a family of good genes as Lan Wangji seemed to have the same condition.
Snap out of it Jiang Wanyin.
____
Jiang Cheng grabbed his bag and was ready to leave when a hand grabbed his waist, preventing him from leaving.
"Who the fuc--"
He quickly turned to find Lan Xichen towering over him, with a smirk dancing on his lips.
"Let go of me, motherfucker." Jiang Cheng grit out and writhed under his grasp, desperately trying to go away when all he wanted to do was go closer.
What the fuck is wrong with me?!
"You were staring at me weird today Little Lotus. I wanted to know what you were thinking about." Lan Xichen murmured, his gaze grew more intense and Jiang Cheng's breathing hitched. The younger male turned to look down at the ground, his feet gently fidgeting.
This new feeling he was feelings was not pleasant. It was...different, and made Jiang Cheng feel things he did not want to feel at all. It was toe-curling, and made his gut wrench, his heart hurt every time he thought about it. Jiang Cheng did not like it.
"Since when have you wanted to know what I thought." He whispered, suddenly teary. Jiang Cheng wanted to cry. More so after hearing the light laughter of the man before him. His head immediately shot up, glaring at him.
"Why are you laughing, idiot?! Stop it!!" Jiang Cheng growled, leaving Lan Xichen laughing more.
"Who knew our Little Lotus looked so adorable when he was mad."
"Shut it motherfucker!!"
Jiang Cheng was practically screaming, gladly now since they were alone in the empty theater hall.
"Why don't you be a bit nicer to me A'Cheng. I don't see anything wrong in calling me by my name. I have done nothing wrong. Hell, I don't think I've ever been rude to you."
His tone was rather serious now, and Jiang Cheng was trying to figure out the meaning behind this entire conversation but he was at a loss. But--why was he so rude to Lan Xichen. In fact, Jiang Cheng could not remember the last time he called Lan Xichen by his name.
"I...We---" He was at a loss. "We are rivals."
Lan Xichen gripped his shoulders, his eyes painstakingly never leaving his own.
"But do we have to be? Rivals? It's so stupid. We have been competing for so long, but for what? Are you not sick of it, A'Cheng? Don't you want to be...something---more? Something that doesn't have to do with competing?"
Jiang Cheng froze. Something...more? Why did they compete. This single moment had Jiang Cheng questioning everything he thought about the Lan since the moment they met.
When Jiang Cheng first laid eyes upon Lan Xichen, he knew there was something between them, but maybe he mistook that something as hate...rivalry.
"Don't you want to---why can't--" Lan Xichen was out of breath, his voice broken and his eyes slightly teary, desperate.
"Can't you just love me?"
.
.
.
"No."
Lan Xichen watched sadly as Jiang Cheng pushed him away and fled through the theater doors. It was no use bargaining with the devil himself.
-----
"You're joking, right?" Nie Huaisang asked Jiang Cheng, mouth agape, shocked at what was just revealed to him. What was mostly just revealed to him.
"Xichen-ge practically, confessed to you and all you said was no and then just left?!"
"Confess my ass, he just said he didn't want to be rivals anymore." That was a lie. The biggest lie Jiang Cheng had ever said. Jiang Cheng grumbled before falling into the comfort of his bed. Nie Huaisang plopped up beside him, before stealing the soft sheets.
"And why did you say no to that Jiang-Xiong? Do you really hate him so much?"
Nie Huaisang knew to an extent that what Jiang Cheng felt for Lan Xichen wasn't hate at all. But for Jiang Cheng to admit that---now that would be a once in a lifetime scene. Jiang Wanyin was a very prideful person, he--unfortunately--took after his mother. For a while Nie Huaisang was set on making Jiang Cheng realize that he liked Lan Xichen or something close to that but his attempts had failed so he gad eventually given up.
"I--" Jiang Cheng was at a loss for words. Did he want to be rivals with Lan Xichen? Jiang Cheng didn't have an answer for that.
"That's what I thought dumbass. I have to go now, I still have a lecture." Nie Huaisang was quick to leave the room and leave Jiang Cheng hurdled in his own thoughts. The script-reading this afternoon had Jiang Cheng in a choke-hold. He was torn between these new feelings for Lan Xichen and the sustainable idea that they were rivals.
-----
The next day at school, jiang Cheng noticed something was different, Lan Xichen was completely avoiding him. He didn't give him that look that he always gave Jiang Cheng when he passed by his in the hallway, in fact he didn't even face Jiang Cheng. There wasn't a single smirk or smile or taunting glance thrown towards him. Even during theater, Lan Xichen looked at him when he needed to. The cold gap between them had grown larger and larger as the days went by.
Yang Shen was worried. He had stalled the kiss scenes up for a while, but with the premiere date of their play approaching, he couldn't afford to stall it any longer. There was no way they would have a good--satisfactory play by the end of June! A part of him hoped making Jiang Cheng and Lan Xichen the leads of this play, would let the two grow closer together in real life. But clearly...that didn't happen. In fact, the opposite did and the couple grew further apart now more than ever.
Such horrible timing too.
Yang Shen groaned as he watched the two interact on stage. Everything was such a mess.
"USE THAT RIDICULOUS CHEMISTRY YOU TWO HAVE, YOU FUCKING DUMB PIECES OF SHIT. Do you want this play to work or not?!!!"
The entire theater hall grew silent. Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng froze upon hearing their teachers bellowing words.
"Use it, or leave motherfuckers!! You are going to be performing our play in 5 days time and you haven't done one intimate scene yet. This play is going to be a fucking disaster!"
The cast quietly mumbled to themselves as the two leads stood by each other, both still and unmoving.
"I want you to rehearse them all today before you leave...well---at least one. Also---both of you are staying after rehearsal ends, I want to have a little chat."
Jiang Cheng slowly nodded and silently braced himself for the rest of the class. They weren't even 20 minutes in yet.
"Fucking hell." He heard Lan Xichen curse under his breath and his lips curved downwards sadly. Of course Lan Xichen didn't want to touch him. Anger surged through Jiang Cheng.
"Fine. We'll rehearse everything today." He shouted in confirmation to his teachers words. Lan Xichen tensed up next to him but begrudgingly nodded and Yang Shen smiled.
"That's what I like to see. But I still want to talk after class."
-----
"What's going on between you two?"
Yang Shen pulled the chair to his desk before sitting. He motioned the two fidgety men in front of him to sit down. He watched as they hesitantly sat down, both flushed and pulling the chair in opposite directions but their body language leaning towards each other.
Yang Shen forehead knit as he watched the two shuffle in their separate chairs as if wanting to be closer.
"Are you two---did you---"
"NO!"
Yang Shen smirked as they cried out in unison. Something was definitely going on.
"If there's a misunderstanding between you two, then clear it up motherfuckers. I don't have time for two little children to mess up my entire show. I don't even know why I made you two the leads at this point. Nie Huaisang would have loved to play Juliet."
Jiang Cheng stole a glance at Lan Xichen but the other man seemed to be unmoved and as stoic as ever.
"Now get out of my office. I want," Yang Shen pointed in between them. "Whatever this is---to be gone before my play starts."
Jiang Cheng was the first to leave the office. He fled through the doors before Yang Shen could say 'I'.
"What's up with him?" The play teacher asked, scratching his head but Lan Xichen only shrugged.
"I could care less."
Yang Shen frowned. What the actual fuck was going on. "Loosen up boy. There's no time for grudges in college. Buy him cake or something. Jiang Cheng is prideful, whatever he said he may not have meant it."
"I think he made it perfectly clear---"
Yang Shen sighed too tired to be dealing with more shit.
"Get out!"
Lan Xichen was quick to gather his stuff and leave.
------
Jiang Cheng silently observed the empty parking lot as he stood outside, drenched in the rain. There was no way for him to get home at the moment and he suddenly felt an overwhelming surge of sadness.
"What the fuck are you doing?" A deep voice said from behind him and Jiang Cheng winced at the tone.
"I--"
"Shut it." Lan Xichen draped his jacket over Jiang Cheng's shoulder and held an umbrella over both their heads. "Idiot."
The older man dragged him over to his car and beckoned for him to get inside.
"I can call for a taxi--"
"Get in." Jiang Cheng immediately obliged. It was way too cold for him out there. he was shivering. "Thank you." He whispered silently against the sweet smelling coat but Lan Xichen did not reply.
The car ride to Jiang Cheng's home was silent. Just the sound of the pattering rain and the heater running throughout the car. Jiang Cheng wanted to to say something, anything to break the silence. He didn't like the new Lan Xichen at all. Somehow, he liked the attention that Lan Xichen gave him in the past. In fact, now that it was gone, he craved it. The feeling was ever so unpleasant and too much to bare sometimes but no matter what Jiang Cheng told himself, he found himself thinking about Lan Xichen all the time.
"We're here."
Lan Xichen's voice broke Jiang Cheng out of his trance. He looked out the window to see his house. "Oh." Reluctantly, Jiang Cheng stepped outside, still in Lan Xichen's jacket. He didn't want to give it back, and Lan Xichen didn't seem to care about it either. Jiang Cheng stood in front of the car door, staring at Lan Xichen, trying to form a sentence. But Lan Xichen didn't even look at him.
"I--"
"Go inside, Jiang Wanyin." And with that the car was gone.
--------
The next 3 days, Jiang Cheng was completely out of it. He hated how Lan Xichen was ignoring him. He really did. It's completely stupid considering Jiang Cheng hated when Lan Xichen talked to him too, but now that he wasn't, everything felt different. Jiang Cheng had thought about talking to Lan Xichen, but he couldn't face him after what happened between them. And furthermore, Lan Xichen didn't seem to want to talk to him either.
So Jiang Cheng tried to let it go, and focus on classes and the play. After all they were performing in a day, and their teacher really wanted it to go well. Play practice was the only time Jiang Cheng and Lan Xichen were civil and tried to get along for the sake of Yang Shen. Jiang Cheng Shen would reach his limit if he saw them out of line again.
But Jiang Cheng the frustration and anger inside him was building up with no way to be released, and by the start of the official play he was very agitated. And Lan Xichen's sudden insults didn't seem to help either.
Jiang Cheng took a deep breath, calming himself, as he stood atop a couple of stairs, behind a make shift tower.
(A/N: Fuck the script, I was originally going to write the lines but then I was like no, cause i was too lazy and you wouldn't get it even if I did so we're just summarizing. I've had this in my drafts for too long anyway.)
He looked down to find Lan Xichen and a few others position below him, straightening their outfits. Lan Xichen seemed to sense his stare and looked up at him, annoyed. And that was Jiang Cheng's last straw.
The curtains lifted, and the crowd cheered, the lights blinded his eyes before they settled. Orchestral Music began playing and the play started. The crew fluttered around the stage, playing their parts perfectly. And they did too. From top to bottom, everything played out.
Yang Shen was over the moon. It was perfect. The tension between Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng fit perfectly into the play. He could say with certainty that this was one of the best plays he had directed in all his years in the theater.
They ended with a kiss. Juliet kissed Romeo as she lay, crying, with a dagger wound to her abdomen.
Lan Xichen's lips were hot against his, his harsh breathing and loud heartbeat, evident. His hands gripped the stage, as the curtain went down. The moment it was fully down, he quickly got up, pushing Jiang Cheng away, making his way back stage in a hurry.
Did Lan Xichen really hate him that much. Jiang Cheng wiped his tears away, before getting up himself, slowly waking backstage. Once he was in the safety of the bathroom, he ripped the dress that was ultimately suffocating him.
The play was torture. It was hell on earth. Being so close to Lan Xichen, kissing him, hugging him, being held by him, but knowing that none of it was real ripped his heart apart. Jiang Cheng sank into the floor, his hands hugging his knees, tears streamed down his face, and heartbreaking sobs were ripped out of him. He was tired. Why? Why? Why him?!
As Jiang Cheng lay crying in the corner of the bathroom, a concerned Lan Xichen just walked in. He heard cries from the men's bathroom and immediately started in that direction. The voice was painstakingly familiar. And when he walked in and saw Jiang Cheng sobbing, his heart dropped instantly.
When Jiang Cheng looked up, and saw Lan Xichen's pained face, everything dawned on him.
The way his body tingled, or his heart flipped, or the gnawing feeling in his stomach whenever Lan Xichen was near him. He did like Lan Xichen. He loved him. The revelation broke him down more. But Lan Xichen hated him, did he not.
Lan Xichen was quick to reach out and take Jiang Cheng in his arms, sinking into the space previously occupied by him. He gently tugged the inky black strands of stray hair behind Jiang Cheng's ears, and softly caressed his face.
"What's wrong A-Cheng? What happened?" He asked slowly, hushing his cries, as he rubbed his back.
"I'm sorry." Jiang Cheng sobbed and buried his face into Lan Xichen's neck, inhaling the mellowing cologne.
"What are you sorry for, baby?"
But Jiang Cheng didn't answer, his sobbed grew louder, and he clutched onto the other's shirt for dear life. The pet name was like a stab in the heart, but at the same time he loved it.
"I need you to calm down for me, sweetheart. Follow my breathing."
He brought Jiang Cheng's trembling hand near his heart, letting him feel his heartbeat. Lan Xichen tried staying as calm as possible, but it was impossible as he had his crying lover in his arms.
Eventually, the bathroom was silent. The pair silently sat there, clinging into each other.
"What happened?" Lan Xichen asked, still holding Jiang Cheng close, refusing to let go. they switched positions. Now Jiang Cheng sat comfortably on Lan Xichen's lap, his legs around his waist and pressed against the wall.
"I just realized something." He silently uttered and Lan Xichen gently wiped his tears away, forcing Jiang Cheng to look up at him. Lan Xichen looked quite serious, and an emotion he couldn't quite figure out hid behind his dark brown eyes.
"I—I love you. I'm sorry, I said what I said that night. I didn't mean to. I thought about it a lot, and no matter how much I tried justifying it, it just didn't seem right. I'm sorry. I just—I thought you hated me."
Lan Xichen let out a laugh, startling Jiang Cheng. He frowned, clutching onto his light blue shirt tighter.
"Why are you laughing?" He huffed and Lan Xichen smiled, and cupped his cheek, making Jiang Cheng press his face closer against his large palm.
"I've always loved you, A'Cheng. From the moment I met you. I admit, the way I approached you, might have made it look like I detested you—"
"Might?" Jiang Cheng raised an eyebrow at he sentence and Lan Xichen sighed.
"The way I approached you made it look like I hated you, but I—I'm not usually like this. I'm not. But when it comes to you—everything just changes. I can't think around you." He revealed and Jiang Cheng's eyes softened.
"I can't breathe, every time you look at me, I just—my lungs fail and I can't move. You're breathtaking...breathtakingly beautiful."
Jiang Cheng leaned into the hug the letter beneath him.
"I'm sorry it took me so long to realize, but I know now. I love you, Lan Xichen. I love you so much."
"Don't apologize, it's ok to take things slow. I should've been more clear about my feelings."
Jiang Cheng just hugged him tighter. "I'm hungry." His voice was muffled against the heat of Lan Xichen's neck.
The latter pulled away and pressed a longing kiss on Jiang Cheng's lips. The younger man reciprocated with fervor, his hands going up run through Lan Xichen's hair.
"Shall we go out to eat?" Lan Xichen asked and Jiang Cheng pulled him in for another kiss.
"If we don't stop I might end up eating out something else, sweetheart."
Jiang Cheng giggled, pulling away, before pressing another kiss to Lan Xichen's lips.
"I thought you said, we're going to take it slow."
Lan Xichen groaned. "Is it too late to take it back?" he asked playfully and Jiang Cheng smirked.
"No...but I really am hungry, Xichen~" Jiang Cheng pouted, his stomach was begging for food. Lan Xichen stood up and set the man in his arms down.
"Then let's go, but I think all the stores are closed by now. So are you sure I can't—"
"Lan Xichen~!" Jiang Cheng smacked his arm and Lan Xichen faked his pain, dramatically clenching his arm.
"I was only joking, no need to hit me that hard."
"Lan Xichen if you don't feed me right now, I'll go myself and eat with my Nie Huaisang."
"Ok, ok let's go.' Lan Xichen quietly ushered him, leading him out of the building. He was never letting go of this man next to him. Never.