Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Noel had been surprised when Ocean of all people had suggested a sleepover for the choir. It was nearly New Year's, she argued, and everyone was a lot closer with one another ever since the Cyclone accident. She called it a friendship enhancing experience. Noel called it trauma bonding.

Nevertheless, the date was set in their group chat, and Noel could hardly refuse when he saw how excited everyone else seemed to be. Except for him, obviously. Ocean believed that everyone was perfectly comfortable with one another ever since their experience, and Noel would rather swallow a thousand live spiders than tell her just how difficult it was for him to be around a certain member of the choir. It's not that he had anything against Misha. It was impossible to, after what they had been through together. In fact, that was the problem. Yes, it was sweet how everyone had bared their souls to the rest of the group, sharing their hopes and dreams for the future and their deepest secrets. Noel just wished that those insights hadn't come along with a giant crush on the angriest boy in town.

Of course Noel had had crushes before. He was well acquainted with the way that his stomach would sink whenever he looked at a boy he liked, knowing that his feelings were unrequited. He would be perfectly fine if that was his only problem. He would simply wait it out like all of the other crushes, only allowing himself to think of it in the dark of his room with nobody around to see the tears starting to form. But instead, every time he caught a glimpse of Misha's face, or his lips, or his arms, Noel was thrown back into the memory of those arms wrapped around him, lips pressed feverishly against his own, and the warm brush of air against his throat as Misha breathed the words "I think I am in love with you."

There were many reasons for Noel to be thankful to Karnak. Bringing the choir back to life, bringing them closer together... but more than anything else, he hated that stupid novelty machine for causing him this amount of emotional pain. It was truly all-consuming. The weeks in the hospital spent recovering from too many injuries to count was nothing compared to the pain of catching sight of Misha's face in school for the first time since the accident. Noel had considered turning on the spot and walking right back out of the building. He probably would have, but when he saw Penny hobbling towards him in a neck brace with a shy smile on her face, he knew he would have to stay. He might be a touch melodramatic, but you could never say that Noel Gruber was not a good friend.

Now Noel was standing outside the Blackwoods' house holding an overnight bag, waiting for the door to open. Instead, he heard his name called from up high, where Ocean and Constance were leaning out of Constance's bedroom window and gesturing for him to come in.

Constance had already set up a couple of mattresses in the living room. She and Ocean were clearly upstairs, but Noel was surprised to see Penny and Ricky sitting together on one of the couches, sharing a comic book. They looked up when Noel entered the room and Penny stood to hug him, beaming. Ricky waved from where he was sat on the couch, matching Penny's smile.

"We'll be down in a second, guys!" Constance shouted from upstairs. Penny sighed and glanced at Ricky.

"We've been here for fifteen minutes and they've been up there the whole time," she told Noel. He laughed a bit, wondering what the two idiots were up to.

Ricky pulled the comic book that he and Penny had been reading back onto his lap and raised his eyebrows at Noel. Penny went and sat back down next to him so they could continue reading, but Noel rolled his eyes and took a seat on the other couch instead. He wanted to wait for a minute before he asked the question on his mind, so that it wouldn't seem suspicious, but he could not stomach watching those two geeks for long. "Do you know if Misha's coming, then?" Noel asked casually, pretending to examine his unpainted nails.

He missed the exasperated glance that Penny shared with Ricky altogether, too focused on looking unbothered. "Yes, he's coming," she said. "Constance called him when we arrived, he said he was busy getting supplies."

Noel glanced up at that. Knowing Misha, that could mean only one thing. "Ocean won't be pleased," he remarked, and Penny chuckled.

"You're telling me."

It was then that the doorbell rang, causing Noel to jump and Penny and Ricky to grin at each other again. "I'll get it," Noel said calmly, knowing exactly who it was. He took his time getting up, but by then he had heard the thump of feet on stairs, and spotted Constance flying down the hallway to get to the door.

Noel heard her exclaim happily, and hurriedly sat back down just as she appeared in the doorway, leading Misha inside. He was carrying a plastic grocery bag, which he set down near the door so that he could run a hand through his hair. His eyes darted around the room and locked onto Noel's just as Noel realised that he was staring and looking away ashamedly. His cheeks flushed as he remembered the feel of Misha's lips against his.

"Ocean, come on down!" Constance shouted. "And bring the stuff, okay?" She slipped past Misha, who was still standing in the doorway, and sat down next to Noel on the sofa, wrapping her arms around him from the side in greeting. "Thanks for coming, guys! Sorry for being so rude just now, but Ocean has been planning this sleepover for ages and she had a few ideas for what we could get up to."

"Is Ocean okay up there?" Penny asked. "I can go and help if she needs it."

Constance shrugged. "I'm sure she'll shout if she needs anything. Misha, come sit down! You can't stand there the entire time."

When Misha moved to sit down on one of the mattresses on the floor, Ricky and Penny looked at him as though they had forgotten that he was there altogether, but Noel didn't. Misha's presence was like a magnet in every room he entered. Noel had to be constantly aware of Misha's exact location to stop himself from looking at the boy, as his eyes would otherwise be drawn towards him without fail. He had caught himself staring far too often, both in class and during choir practice. If Misha caught him, the chances were good that Noel would lose one of his only friends. Maybe he'd die of embarrassment before that could happen.

He couldn't blame Misha, though. Noel obviously had no experience whatsoever in this matter, but had he been forced to kiss someone that he felt no attraction to, while being engaged to someone of the opposite sex, he would probably choose to avoid them, too. Noel wondered if perhaps his sad little crush was blatantly obvious, and it was making Misha too uncomfortable to be near him. Maybe Misha assumed that, since Noel was gay and touch-starved, the kiss they had shared would invite some kind of obsession, and he was trying to nip it in the bud. He wouldn't exactly be wrong in that assumption, but Noel prayed that none of that was the case.

Noel settled more comfortably into the couch, resting his shoulder against Constance's and half listening as she spoke to Penny and Ricky about their comic. He was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't even notice Ocean come in until she was directly beside him. Of course, she managed to snap him right out of it by leaning in and saying, directly in his ear, "you can stop making googly eyes at Misha now, Noel. We're all here."

Noel snapped his eyes away, feeling his cheeks start to flush in mortification. He hadn't even noticed that he was staring once again, although from Penny's shit eating grin, she definitely had. He promised himself to avoid even looking in Misha's direction for the rest of the night, too embarrassed to even look over now to see the boy's reaction to Ocean's little quip.

Ocean was balancing in her arms what looked like a game of Twister, a stack of DVDs and a closed box with Constance's name picked out in pink sequins on the lid. She had an excited smile on her face as she motioned for Noel to take the box and open it, so she could put the rest of the stuff down on Constance's coffee table. Noel let out a soft gasp as he saw what was in the box. Apparently Constance was some kind of avid collector of nail polish, because there had to be at least forty bottles of the stuff in the box. Noel could see glitter polishes, metallic, iridescent, regular colours and even a couple of sheets of nail stickers.

"We were thinking you might want to do all of our nails, Noel?" Constance said. "Since you always do such a good job on yourself."

"Yes!" Penny blurted out, and Ricky grinned and waggled his fingers at Noel.

Noel grinned self-consciously, running a hand along the tops of all the bottles. "I don't know, guys. It always turns out kind of crappy on me, and I don't know if everyone would be interested." He dared to sneak a glance at Misha, who was still sitting on the mattress with his arms wrapped around his knees. He tended to do that when he was uncomfortable, Noel noticed. He still hadn't said a word since entering, but at least he wasn't looking at Noel.

"You do a great job on your nails, Noel," Constance insisted.

"It's just you always pick it off within a couple of hours," Ocean pointed out. "Please, Noel? I really wanted to do something that could tie us all together, and wouldn't it be so cute to have matching nails?"

Noel couldn't help looking back over at Misha, but regretted it instantly when he found Misha staring right at him. Misha seemed to think that Noel was looking to him as the person who was going to ruin this activity, and his brow furrowed. "I don't mind it," Misha said stubbornly. "Is only holiday anyway. Nobody will see apart from you."

Ocean laughed triumphantly and pointed an accusatory finger at Noel. "Now you have to do it!" she crowed. "Even Misha agrees with me!"

Noel tried to sigh, but he was secretly pleased. "Fine," he grumbled. "Who wants to go first?"

"I can do Constance's nails," Ocean said. Noel glanced at her. "To speed things up," Ocean clarified, looking quickly away from Noel and down at the box of nail polishes.

"Aw, thanks Ocean!" Constance said. She leaned over to pick out a purple polish and a silver glitter, to match her hair and the frames of her glasses. "What do you guys think?" she asked.

"I'll do those colours too," Ocean said. "We can match, right?" Constance smiled softly at her best friend, before moving to kneel at the coffee table. Ocean followed, ready to start painting.

Penny came over to pick out some colours for herself and Ricky. She chose a blue polish for herself, to match the ribbons in her braids, and a silver metallic one for Ricky. "Like the Silver Surfer," she explained, and Ricky grinned widely at her. Noel was entirely in his element as he dug through the bottles of polish. Usually he picked black, as the least offensive colour to all of the homophobes at school, and his own mother, but Misha was completely right. Who was going to see him if he painted his nails a different colour, just once? He'd probably have it all picked off by the time he got home tomorrow, anyway.

So when his fingers brushed against a little bottle of red polish that was practically the exact colour of the lipstick he wore as Monique, he made his decision. He pulled it out of the box with a bit of a blush. He needed to get a grip on himself. All he could see when he looked at the polish was lipstick smudged over Misha's lips. Ocean was already painting Constance's nails and Penny was doing her own with an air of intense concentration, so Noel motioned for Ricky to come sit by him. He also forced himself to look at Misha and offer him the box so he could choose, but Misha was staring directly at the bottle that was already in Noel's hand. Noel watched as his throat worked for a moment, before Misha lifted his gaze to Noel's face. His face was oddly twisted as he said, "I want that one," but Noel simply shrugged, only a tiny bit disappointed.

"Okay. I'll pick a different one, so."

"No," Misha blurted. "I mean, you can use that also. It is not a problem. Nobody will see."

Noel felt a slight pang of sadness. Some part of him liked the idea of everybody seeing that he was matching with Misha. He had to stop thinking like that. Despite his schoolboy crush, Misha had a fiancée. It was not Noel's place to be fantasizing about him. Instead, he held out his hand for Ricky's nail polish, and slid onto the floor to start painting. Noel couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so happy. It was like a bone-deep sense of comfort, as though someone had wrapped a warm blanket directly around his soul. He was here, with his friends, in a place where he knew nobody would ever judge him. Moments like these made him wish that he could freeze time. He wanted to live in this feeling forever. After Noel had done two coats of polish on Ricky's nails, he sat up a bit straighter and cracked his back. Ricky smiled and hugged him in thanks, but Noel let out a shriek. "The nails!"

Ricky pulled away quickly and examined his hands in horror, then signed OK in relief. The whole choir was learning basic sign to communicate properly with Ricky, as they knew how hard it must have been to go from being able to sing and dance in the warehouse back to being unable to speak. Not to mention the chronic pain and the weakness in his limbs. Noel grumbled and shoved him on the shoulder.

"Get out of here, you idiot. Go sit in a corner somewhere and think about what you've done."

Ricky rolled his eyes and signed dick. Noel stuck his tongue out at him. He was still grinning stupidly when he locked eyes with Misha. The boy was clutching the red nail polish so tightly that his knuckles were white, and his eyes were boring straight into Noel's soul. Oh, God, I'm going to have to hold his hands, Noel thought dumbly. He wasn't sure if he was more excited or terrified at the prospect. Misha moved to sit in front of Noel, and wordlessly held out the bottle of nail polish. Noel reached out and gently took it, eyes trained intently on unscrewing the cap. Still, out of the corner of his eye he could see Misha's hands shaking gently.

"You know you don't have to do this, right?" Noel said. "Some people might make fun of you for painting your nails. They think that it makes you gay for putting colour on your nails. It's stupid, but it's true, and it makes sense if you don't want to deal with that. We're not going to think any less of you for it."

He glanced up to see Misha's lips curve into a smile. "Is okay. I don't mind. If people say anything, I will fight them."

"Or you could ignore them," Noel offered, starting to grin despite himself.

"I could," Misha admitted. "But where is the fun in that?"

Noel rolled his eyes and laughed softly, then held out his hand for Misha's. He was staring directly at his own hand now to avoid meeting Misha's gaze. He didn't want the other boy to realise that he's holding the hand of the only gay boy in all north-eastern Saskatchewan, and freak out. But Misha didn't move his hands from where they were braced against his knees, and when Noel looked up again the boy looked pale. Even so, he was still beautiful.

"Misha," he said. "I'm not forcing you to paint your nails. Seriously, it's not a big deal."

Misha nodded vaguely, as though his mind was elsewhere. Then his eyes snapped back to Noel's. "No, I want to. But I will drink first. Calms the nerves."

Noel laughed again. "If you say so. Ocean's gonna kill you for whipping out the liquor at six pm."

Misha shrugged as he made his way over to the plastic bag containing the alcohol. "When do I ever listen to a word that girl says?"

"I can hear you," Ocean snapped from the other side of the room. Noel could clearly make out Constance's muffled giggles.

Misha sat back down in front of Noel, this time holding a bottle of vodka. "You want to try?" he offered. "Is mango flavour."

"Really?" Noel said doubtfully.

Misha held the bottle to his lips and tipped his head back, swallowing a worrying amount of liquid before looking back down consideringly. Noel watched his throat move in a dazed sort of way. "No. Tastes of mouthwash. But is still drink, yes?"

Noel laughed. "Maybe later. I don't think I could handle getting the liver failure lecture just yet."

"I can still hear you," Ocean snapped, whipping her head around. "And liver failure is no joke."

Misha snorted softly and screwed the cap back on the vodka. "Okay. Nail time."

Noel was grateful that Misha seemed to have warmed up to them again. He had been worried that Misha was going to act the way that he had been acting for the last few weeks in school, but it was almost like they were all back in the warehouse. That is, in terms of Misha's personality. Penny still had a head, and their every move wasn't being choreographed by an ominous novelty machine with no concept of boundaries or consent. Noel had to fight to contain the blush at yet another reminder of what he and Misha had done in the warehouse.

Misha stuck out a hand for Noel to take, which he did with only a minor hesitation. Misha's hands were warm, and dry, and hardly trembled at all. Noel gripped his thumb and turned it to start painting, working with intense concentration. He prayed that his hands wouldn't get sweaty while holding Misha's. The first nail done, he changed his grip again and started to paint the next nail, until Misha's hand jolted without warning and caused Noel to slop polish onto the side of his pointer.

"Sorry," Misha blurted, running his free hand through his hair. Noel glanced up concernedly.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yes, I'm fine. Keep going," Misha said. Noel frowned and watched as Misha's jaw clenched, but he figured the sooner this was over, the better for the Ukrainian. When the nails were done, with minimal mess, Misha held his hands up to the light and huffed out a soft breath.

"They are good, Noel," he said, watching as the light caught the polish in different ways.

"Yeah, sorry about that one finger," Noel mumbled. He was starting to feel almost shy about the look of wonder in Misha's eyes. He found himself staring at Misha's hands as he turned them this way and that. The boy had beautiful hands. Noel forced himself to look away before it got weird and he did something stupid like start to blush. "I'll do my nails now," Noel announced to the room in general. Everyone else was finished and all but dry, but Noel knew he could move quickly.

"Okay," Constance chirped.

"Why doesn't Misha do yours?" Ocean asked. "Return the favour." Noel turned to glare at Ocean at the exact moment that Misha did, and Ocean rolled her eyes and muttered something under her breath. "Never mind," she said aloud, then leaned over to whisper something to Constance, who giggled softly.

Noel rolled his eyes as he set to work on his own nails, focusing intently. It took him 10 minutes in total, at which point the others had gotten bored. "Why don't we play Twister now?" Ocean exclaimed. The question hung in the air for an uncomfortable moment, and then Ocean turned to look at Ricky. Her smile slowly faded, and she flushed embarrassedly. "Oh no, sorry. I always play it with Constance, but we'll do something else instead."

Ricky shrugged and started slowly signing. It's OK. I like watching you idiots flop around like fish out of water when you play anyway. Ocean looked at him gratefully. "Really?" she said. He smiled crookedly and nodded. Ocean giggled. "Thanks, Ricky. Come on, guys?"

"I'm going to sit this round out," Noel declared, waving his still tacky nails in the air. He sat down next to Ricky on the couch and balanced the spinner on his lap. "Come on, guys, I'll spin. But be careful, I'm not going easy on you."

Penny and Ocean bounced impatiently by the mat, but Constance and Misha were a bit slower to get involved. "Come on!" Penny shouted at them. "We don't have all day, I'm ready to win!"

Ocean scoffed. "Yeah, right, you little liar. We'll see how far you get."

"Ocean, you can go first," Noel said as he spun the dial of the spinner. "Left leg on red."

Ocean planted one foot firmly on the nearest spot, smiling smugly at Penny.

"Constance, left hand on yellow." She did so, laughing.

"Penny, right leg on blue. Misha, left hand in the air."

Misha frowned. "It is already, no?"

Noel shrugged, and kept spinning.

It didn't take long before Constance tapped out, claiming that the game was getting too competitive for her. Which was fair enough, given the way that Penny and Ocean were entirely tangled together and were still finding ways to shove and elbow one another. "Give up," Penny hissed into Ocean's ear, her lips all but kissing Ocean's flushed cheek. Misha was crouched on his own corner of the mat, entirely unaffected by what was going on around him. He glanced over to Noel, eyes sparkling with humour. Noel felt his mouth twist into a shy smile and looked away quickly.

"Never," Ocean growled. She tried to use her left leg, currently in the air, to hook around Penny's foot and trip her, but Misha tsked and used his right hand to grab Ocean's ankle and tug it away from Penny. This, of course, caused Ocean to collapse, dragging Penny down with her in a tangle of arms and legs. Noel didn't even have a chance to declare Misha the winner before Ocean was bouncing to her feet and shouting in outrage at how unfair that was. "I demand a rematch!" she shouted, glaring daggers at both Penny and Misha.

"Oh, you're so on, princess," Penny said, grinning wickedly. Misha simply smiled and shrugged.

"Well, I'm definitely not playing again," Constance admitted. "Can you take over for me, Noel?"

Noel's mouth went dry at the thought of it. He had seen how tangled up Penny and Ocean had gotten, and with his luck the same thing would happen to him, but with Misha. And if that happened, he would probably faint on the spot. "I need a drink first," he muttered. Ocean let out an angry squawk, but Noel ignored it and grabbed the bottle of vodka that Misha had opened earlier. He shut his eyes as he wrapped his lips around the bottle and tipped his head back, taking in about three gulps of the stuff. Misha was right, it did taste exactly like mouthwash, and it burned unpleasantly going down, but it would certainly do the trick. He put the bottle back down and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

"Oh, close your mouth, Misha," Ocean snapped angrily. "You wouldn't want something to fly in." Noel whipped his head around sharply, but Misha wasn't even looking at him. Instead, Noel glared at Ocean, because God forbid you waste an opportunity.

Penny chuckled. "Come on, Constance, start spinning. Hopefully our sobriety will give us a razor sharp edge against these two bumbling idiots." She nudged Ocean with her shoulder and was rewarded with a smug smile.

Noel shrugged and made his way over to the mat.

"Ocean, left foot to yellow, please," Constance said.

"Penny, left foot to green." Penny made sure to bump against Ocean on her way to the green spot, laughing to herself.

"Noel, right hand on blue." Noel crouched down, eyes trained on the mat. Just because he wasn't quite as loud about it as the two girls didn't mean he didn't have a vicious competitive streak, and he was sure that he would win.

"Misha, left hand on blue." Misha crouched down next to Noel and gave him a crooked grin.

"Good luck, Noel," he whispered.

Noel gave him an extremely quick smile and then forced himself to look away before he started to blush.

"Noel, left leg on red." Noel muttered grumpily as he stretched out across the mat, glaring up at where Ocean was smiling smugly down on him.

The only thing he was grateful for was that for the whole game, Misha was being mostly confined to one side of the mat. But of course, that was not to last. "Misha, right hand on red, please," Constance said with a small giggle.

Of course she was giggling. The only red dot left was on the other side of where Noel was sprawled across the mat. Misha groaned as he tried to reach over Noel's head to get to the red, stretching out until his chest was flush with Noel's back. Noel's throat went dry. He knew this was going to happen. He fucking knew it.

"Sorry, Noel," Misha murmured. Noel could feel his hot breath ghosting against the delicate skin right behind his ear, and he couldn't help but let out an involuntary shudder. It only got worse when he heard Misha chuckle under his breath.

"What?" Noel snapped tensely.

"Nothing," Misha whispered, leaning in closer to the side of Noel's face. "I am just having fun."

Noel could feel himself blushing bright red. He was lucky that nobody could really see his face, because he just knew that Penny would be having a field day right now. "If you're trying to psych me out, it won't work," he hissed at Misha. "I'm going to win this."

He felt Misha's chest heave against his back, then Misha leaned in yet again. Even closer. His lips actually brushed against Noel's ear when he said, "I do not doubt it, Noel."

Noel had to bite down on his lip to stop a gasp from slipping out. What was Misha doing? Did he realise what it was he was doing? There's no way he didn't feel the cartilage of Noel's ear against his lips. He absolutely hadn't needed to lean in as close as he did. Noel felt the hairs rise along the back of his neck, but he had committed now.

"Noel, left leg to yellow," Constance said. At last! This meant that Noel was able to pull his leg forward, which left him crouching all in one corner of the mat. He still kept his gaze resolutely away from Misha at all costs, so he didn't see how Ocean tried to lunge towards a different blue spot and overstepped, falling on top of Misha and dragging Penny down with her. Misha collapsed too with a grunt, and Noel whirled around to see the three of them lying on the mat, groaning.

"Hah!" he crowed, standing up and helping Ocean and Penny to their feet. He hesitated briefly before offering a hand to Misha, who refused it anyway. "I knew I would win," he said, cracking his knuckles with a satisfied sigh.

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up," Ocean grumbled. "I think we should do something else now."

"Sore loser," Noel cackled. "Couldn't handle the heat, I see."

But I was having so much fun watching you flop around like a dying fish! signed Ricky, and Penny giggled.

"Haha," snapped Ocean. "Let's pack it up, people. We can watch a movie instead."

Just as Noel went to sit on the couch, he felt a hand brush against his shoulder. He turned to see Misha grinning at him. "Congratulations on your win," he said, and Noel laughed.

"I know," he agreed. "Maybe I'll teach you a thing or two next time."

"Maybe," Misha agreed. "Although I think if you had not moved I could have won."

"Oh yeah?" Noel asked, feeling a slight jolt of excitement in his chest.

"Definitely," Misha said. He was looking directly at Noel, and Noel realised just how blue the boy's eyes were. "We will play again sometime, yes?"

"Sure," Noel breathed, then cleared his throat and glanced away. "Uh, yeah. Yeah, okay."

He quickly made his way over to a couch to sit next to Penny, who nudged his shoulder with her own, but Noel refused to look at her. He could barely focus all through whatever garbage film Ocean had picked, instead alternating between picking at his newly painted nails and staring at the back of Misha's head from where he sat on the mattress in front of the couch.

It was nearly eleven o'clock when the film ended. The sky had been dark since about six, but now it was really feeling late. About a third of the way through, Misha had broken out some cans of cider for the choir so everyone was feeling at least a little bit buzzed, except Ocean. Misha and Noel were considerably tipsier. All of this meant that when Penny suggested that they play a party game, it sounded like the best idea in the world to everyone else. She said that she had learned to play it with a flip flop, but it could be played just as well with a coin. The rules were as follows: one person would whisper a question to the person next to them, which would then be answered aloud. It could be any question, but for the best experience, the answer would involve one of the people at the party. Then, the coin would be flipped. If it landed on heads, the question would be told to the group. If it landed on tails, it would remain a secret.

The questions started out tame, of course. Noel asked Penny who the funniest person in the friend group was (Ricky), and Penny asked Misha who was the best singer (Penny). Ricky would type out his questions to show Ocean. And then Penny asked something to Misha and his whole mood changed. "I'm not answering that," he snapped. Penny's smile dropped, but Ocean scoffed.

"That's not fair! We've all had to answer some pretty stupid questions. Just suck it up and answer, and if you're lucky we won't even find out the question."

"No," Misha said flatly.

"Ocean..." Constance started, but Ocean cut her off.

"Misha, come on. You're ruining the game."

"It's fine, I'll just ask a different question," said Penny miserably, but Misha scoffed and raised his bottle to his lips.

"Is stupid game anyway. We should play something else."

"I want to hear this question," Ocean said, and Noel groaned internally. Why was it so impossible for her to realise when to stop pushing?

"Drop it, Ocean, it's not like there's some questions you wouldn't like to answer," he said, and she turned to glare at him.

"Don't you start, Noel," she said. "I know exactly what questions you wouldn't answer."

Noel rolled his eyes. "Shut up. That's a lie."

Ocean grinned smugly. "Want to prove it?"

"Fine."

"Fine!"

She scooted over to sit next to him and cleared her throat primly before leaning in. "Who is the most attractive person in this room?" she whispered, and Noel swore he felt his heart stop. "Come on, Noel," she goaded, smirking. "Nothing?"

Noel shook his head wordlessly, swallowing to wet his throat. "That's not fair, Ocean."

"So? Neither is Misha refusing to answer."

"Ocean," Constance tried again.

"No, Constance. We all knew the rules of the game when we started playing, and now we need to stick to it. That goes for Misha and Noel."

"Ocean, to be fair, it was a really stupid question," Penny said. "I asked Misha who the prettiest person in the room was. I forgot that he's engaged to Talia." Noel glanced over at Ocean, who looked just as shocked as he did.

Misha sighed and wrapped his arms around his knees. "I am sorry, Misha," Penny continued. "Usually you talk about her more, so it just slipped my mind."

Noel wasn't sure that anyone else saw Misha tense up at that. Ocean definitely didn't, because then she went and put her big fat foot in it once again. "Yeah, that was kind of weird," she said. "I mean, since when does Mister Passionate Loverboy over here ever let up about his imaginary fiancée?"

"Ocean!" Noel shouted, seeing Misha's head drop lower into his arms. "Do you have to be such a bitch?"

Ocean's mouth dropped open. "What did you call me?"

"You heard me," Noel snapped. "You're being a massive, raging bitch."

"Guys, stop," Constance shouted, but it was drowned out by Misha.

"Both of you shut up," he snapped. "I broke up with Talia weeks ago."

Noel found his mouth opening and closing soundlessly while his brain struggled to catch up. "You what?" he managed.

Misha shrugged and took another gulp of his drink. "Cyclone accident changed me. I am different person now, not same man she fell in love with. I did not think it fair to hold her to promise she made to another man. She would have better chance at happiness with someone like who I was, not someone like who I am now."

Noel and Ocean both stared at him. "Oh, Misha," Noel breathed. "That's beautiful."

Misha shrugged bitterly. "Maybe. Still sucks."

"I think maybe we should call it a night here," Constance said. "I have some more stuff planned for us tomorrow, so it'd be good to get some sleep."

Misha nodded silently and grabbed his plastic bag, going off to find somewhere to change.

"I claim a couch," Penny said quickly, sticking her hand straight up into the air.

"I claim the other one," shouted Ocean, but Penny giggled and shook her head. "Nope, that one goes to Ricky, I'm afraid." 

Even Ocean wasn't stupid enough to dispute that. Instead she grumpily claimed the larger of the two mattresses for herself and Constance. This left one twin sized mattress, and two six foot boys.

"Um," Noel started, but Ocean was still clearly fuming about being called a massive raging bitch, because she wouldn't hear a word of it. She flounced off to change in the bathroom, leaving Constance to stare apologetically at Noel. "Whatever," he muttered, sitting down on the edge of the mattress defeatedly.

Ocean came back a while later, hair wrapped up in a pink satin bonnet that matched her pale pink pyjamas. She looked like the epitome of grace as she settled herself under the covers in her king sized mattress. Misha came back a moment later wearing basketball shorts and what was quite possibly the world's worst tank top. The cut of it wasn't particularly offensive, and it fit him perfectly (Noel felt his mouth going dry the longer he looked, so he had to stop), it was simply the fact that it said, in giant block letters, LIVING THE GANGSTER LIFE. Truly, Noel had never seen anything worse. When Misha turned to put his bag back down, Noel could count the moles picked out like stars against Misha's golden skin. Without another word he grabbed his own bag and rushed off to change into his own shorts and t-shirt. Plain black, thank you, although his shorts were considerably shorter than Misha's.

The lights were turned off and everyone seemed to already be asleep when Noel re-entered the living room, but Misha was nowhere to be seen. He decided to just bite the bullet and lie down on the floor next to the mattress. When Misha came back, he stopped and stared at Noel lying there with an arm slung over his face. "Surely you are not so drunk as that," Misha whispered incredulously as he stepped over Noel and sat down on the mattress.

"No, I just thought you might want the mattress," Noel whispered back, turning over and peeking at Misha from under his arm.

Misha laughed softly, awkwardly. "Is fine, Noel. We can share mattress for one night."

Noel swallowed thickly. "You sure?" he asked.

"Very," Misha confirmed. He rolled over and lay down on one side, then patted the part next to him.

"It's not like anything's going to happen anyway," Noel joked. "With a gay man and a straight man sharing a bed."

Misha laughed, but it sounded uncomfortable. "Yeah."

Noel frowned. "Sorry. Didn't mean to freak you out. I'm not planning on ravishing you in your sleep, if that's what you're worried about."

Misha looked over at him. Their eyes met for a moment longer than Noel had expected. "I was not worried."

Noel sat up and shifted over to lie down next to Misha, dragging his blanket with him. He could feel the heat from Misha's body they were so close, but he wasn't complaining. He lay staring at the ceiling until he felt the mattress shift beneath him and saw Misha turn to face him out of the corner of his eye. "Noel," Misha whispered.

Noel dared to turn his head to look, but didn't fully roll over onto his side. He could see Misha's eyes sparkling in the darkness. "Yes?"

"I wanted to thank you for saying those things to Ocean. When she was talking about me."

Noel couldn't help but laugh a bit. "It's fine. Don't even worry about it."

He made to roll back over, sure that the conversation was over, but Misha grabbed his hand under the blankets. "No, seriously. I am sure I would have gotten angry if you had not stepped in."

Noel made a sort of noise in the back of his throat, staring down at where their hands were clasped. Misha noticed, but didn't let go. "Are you okay, Noel?"

Noel could feel tears starting to prick the back of his eyes. He turned to look at Misha again, drinking in the sight of his concerned face, made softer by the darkness. He could see the hollows of his throat and cheekbones. "Don't do that," he whispered, and Misha dropped his hand away with a look that almost seemed horrified.

"I am sorry," he whispered back. "I didn't mean..."

"I know," Noel interrupted. "Don't worry about it." But he didn't roll back over, and neither did Misha. "Are you sad about Talia?"

Misha frowned for a second, and it looked as though his eyes had gotten glossier. "Not so much. I miss what we had before, but that is not what we had recently. Our love died not long after I did. And I think that something else might have been born instead, like a phoenix, maybe. Is that too much of a cliché?"

Noel half smiled. "You speak like a poet."

Misha shrugged and dropped his gaze for a moment. He seemed almost bashful. "I learned from the best." His eyes flickered back up to meet Noel's again, and he grinned, a flash of white in the darkness.

Noel scoffed. "You're funny."

"I'm serious," Misha said. "You are more of a poet than I'll ever be." He pulled his hand out from under the blanket and it almost seemed as though he was going to reach out and brush Noel's cheek, but instead he let it fall to his own shoulder.

"Careful," Noel joked. "You wouldn't want me falling in love with you."

Misha's eyes were serious in the dark. There was a couple of beats of silence, the same kind of crushing silence that you get when you sink underwater in an empty pool.

"What if I did?" he whispered, almost too quietly to hear.

Noel felt his heart miss a beat. His brows knitted together. "Don't be cruel, Misha," he whispered coldly, rolling over to the other side of the mattress. Of course the newly broken up straight boy would choose now to start experimenting. Misha was drunk, and it was late, and Noel was just there, so it was only really natural. Noel wouldn't hold it against him, but it didn't mean that he would go along with it. No matter how much he might want to.

He heard a shaky breath in the darkness. Then, a warm hand brushing against his shoulder through the cotton of his shirt. He still didn't turn around, despite the shivers racing down his spine.

"This isn't how I imagined coming out to you," he heard Misha whisper from behind him, and he froze.

Noel couldn't say anything, couldn't force the words off his clumsy tongue. All he could do was turn around and properly look at Misha. He was all but frozen in disbelief, but Misha was staring back at him in earnest, tear tracks tracing his cheeks. Noel hated himself for this, but all he could think to do was run, so he did. He disentangled himself from the blankets and darted out of the room and into the bathroom nearby, taking a seat on the toilet and gripping his face with his hands. He took a few wavering breaths, feeling tears slip out of his eyes and run down his face and wrists.

Of course he had had a crush on Misha since the warehouse. Every time he looked at him, it felt as though he was back there, lips pressed feverishly to lips, lipstick smudging, hands roaming, breathing sharp. But he couldn't stomach the thought of losing a friend because of a stupid drunken mistake in the middle of the night. He would have to go out and tell him as much. Tell him that if Misha was being serious, he could ask again tomorrow, and if he wasn't then Noel would think no worse of him for it. With that decided he stood, taking another shaky breath to calm himself and then opening the door.

Misha was standing there, half wild, still in that godawful tank top, his eyes burning with frantic passion. "Noel, I'm sorry, my poet, I didn't mean to scare you," he breathed, stepping into the bathroom and lifting shaking hands as though he would take Noel's face in them. Instead he kept them in the air, mere inches away from Noel's face, his own face torn between a mix of sorrow and hope.

"Misha," Noel breathed, drinking in the sight of him. "What..."

"Don't speak," Misha begged. "I don't know if I can hear it right now. I'm sorry, I should never have said anything, it just slipped out... I'm sorry to make you uncomfortable, my poet, it was never my intention to hurt you." His voice broke and he lowered his shaking hands again, starting to pick at the nails that Noel had so carefully painted. "I will leave, if you want me to," he said earnestly, eyes boring into Noel's. "I won't ever speak of this again. But please, let us stay friends. I don't think I can live without you."

Noel reached out impulsively and grabbed Misha's hands in his, pulling them apart to stop him from picking at the polish. Misha's hands were warm and soft, but Noel could feel Misha's entire body shuddering at the touch. He looked so gorgeous and broken that Noel felt all of his resolve melt away in a matter of seconds. "I don't..." he began, eyes still locked with Misha's. "I don't want to be just friends."

Misha's face twisted with hope and his mouth opened, just barely, to let out a sigh that sounded like a name. Heart pounding, head swimming, Noel reached up and brushed his lips against Misha's. It was featherlight, barely even contact, but it was so much better than the kiss in the warehouse. Noel felt the air leave his body and he was forced to let go of Misha's hands to wrap them around his neck in case he lost balance from the sensation of it. In a split second, Misha's eyes snapped closed and his hands delved into Noel's hair, gripped and cupping the back of his neck to slant his head and press deeper into the kiss. There were fireworks going off behind Noel's eyes as their lips slotted together like the crash of continents. Misha pushed Noel up against the nearest wall to deepen the kiss all the more, never once breaking away for even a moment. Noel's hands moved from where they were wrapped around Misha's neck to tangle in his dark curls. Misha let out a soft noise in his throat at that and Noel pressed deeper against his lips, wanting to swallow that noise and keep it as his own.

They broke apart for a second, and Noel tried to drink in every detail of Misha's beautiful face. He leaned forward and pressed one, two featherlight kisses to the damp skin beneath Misha's eyes, and felt as his body shuddered against him at the touch. He leaned in again, trailing his lips down Misha's cheek until he reached his lips, then gently slotting his mouth back over Misha's. Noel could feel the hands in his hair trembling with restraint, but he was enjoying this game. He moved again, kissing the corner of the other boy's mouth, his jaw, the skin beneath his ear. He savoured the soft gasping sound that Misha let out at that, and did it again for the sheer joy of it.

"Please, poet," Misha breathed out, still trembling. "Let me touch you."

Noel closed his eyes and pressed another kiss to the skin where Misha's shoulder met his neck. He ran shaking fingers along the boy's collarbone, skimming over the strap of his shirt. "Okay," he mouthed against Misha's throat, and immediately felt hot fingers under his chin, pulling him up to meet in a frenzied press of lips. He heard Misha groan, felt it reverberate deep in his throat, and Noel couldn't help but let out a quiet gasp. Misha's hands gripped the back of Noel's neck, his fingers skimming just under the neckline of Noel's shirt.

Noel felt dizzy from pure want. Was it possible to need someone's touch this much? How would he live normally knowing that life can feel so good? The thought has him pulling away, disentangling his fingers from where they had once again found Misha's hair. Misha's lips were swollen and his cheeks flushed, but his eyes were bright.

"What is it, poet?" Misha breathed, letting his fingers trace the curve of Noel's cheekbone.

"Is this real?" Noel asked. "This can't be just some drunken experiment for you, because it's real for me." He watched Misha warily as the poor boy tried to form a coherent thought, still inebriated from the kiss.

Finally Misha moved closer, burying his hands back into Noel's hair. "This is real," he breathed. "This is exactly what I have dreamed of since our kiss in the warehouse, but now it is coming from real passion and not creepy doll man. I promise you, Noel Gruber, I want this. I want you."

Noel's lips trembled and he nodded, tilting his face up to allow Misha easier access. It was made good use of, as Misha leaned back down to press a slow, careful kiss to Noel's mouth. Noel sighed into it, eyelids fluttering, and he moved his hands to run up and down Misha's back, tracing the scattering of moles that he could feel on the boy's warm skin. Misha groaned against Noel's mouth, deepening the kiss once more. They could have stayed there for hours, and indeed would have. They were so lost in one another that they didn't hear the door to the bathroom open. They did hear Ocean's shrill scream and jumped apart guiltily, staring at her horrified face.

"Oh, God," she shrieked, covering her face with both hands in shame and horror. "Oh, I should have just given you the bigger bed!"

"Get out!" Noel shouted, pulling away from Misha, who was laughing out of sheer horror.

"No!" Ocean yelled. "I want to use the bathroom for its intended purpose, so you two can go find somewhere else to... canoodle! In fact, forget it! Go back to bed! And I'll be keeping an eye on you two, so don't even try anything in there!"

Misha shrugged lazily, all of his frantic energy seeming to have melted away in the face of Ocean's wrath. "Fine."

He grabbed Noel's hand in his, intertwining their fingers so perfectly, as though they had been made for one another. When they reached the bed, Noel's tiredness finally caught up with him. Here, curled up under the blankets, perfectly cocooned in the heat being emitted from their bodies, Noel felt safe. They weren't boyfriends yet, he knew, but as Misha wrapped his arms around Noel's waist and pressed sleepy, open mouthed kisses to his neck and shoulders, Noel thought that he finally knew what the future would hold.