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Chloe took a cleansing breath while stepping away from the merry sounds of the celebration inside Grimmauld Place, the home that Chloe had been happy to share with Andromeda and Teddy after Tonk's and Remus' deaths left Andromeda with a little half-werewolf-half-metamorphmagus child to raise.
Chloe had been having a lovely day despite greatly missing her daughter. But Trixie had been excited to go to Florida with her dad and Dan's cousins for a special celebration at Disney World for the twenty anniversary of Dan's cousin's wedding. Dan had convinced Chloe to allow Trixie to go with them. It wasn't easy for Chloe, as it would be the first time she wouldn't have her daughter with her during the holidays, but it was worth it the expression on Trixie's face when she had been given the news. There had been a bit of drama when she realised that Chloe wouldn't be going with them, but it had been soothed with the promise of many calls and another holiday later on, only the two of them.
Chloe considered this part of her penance for taking Trixie away to Rome a few months ago. She hadn't been fair to Dan, taking his daughter away for the whole summer when he had been trying to be a better father, to be there for their child as much as he could.
However, it had left Chloe without plans for the holidays, with her mother planning to go abroad and the 'tribe' helplessly divided after Chloe's fallout with Lucifer and his recent decision to start a relationship with Eve.
But in the end, this helped Chloe decide to accept Andromeda's invitation to go home for the holidays. Over the last few years, she hadn't wanted to involve Trixie too much with the Wizarding World until they knew if she had magic or not. Therefore, she hadn't seen her family and friends back home as much as she would have liked and not for significant holidays since Trixie's birth.
Of course, her daughter knew Chloe was a witch and a bit of her past life, but only a few details. Chloe had avoided using magic too much in her life in LA.
For security and compliance with the Statute, she had cast a slight kid-friendly spell made for half-blood families, ensuring that Trixie - and Dan - didn't accidentally spell the beans to anyone beyond their immediate family - Dan, Trixie, Penelope, and Chloe herself.
And wasn't she had been happy about this with the whole Malcolm debacle?
So Trixie, neither Dan could tell anyone about Chloe. And Chloe hadn't told anyone either since Dan.
Not even to Lucifer.
Or Maze.
Speaking of which, Chloe looked down at the phone and the reason she had stepped away from the Yule celebration inside. The message arrived early in the evening through the muggle channels Gringotts had made available to their clients. Chloe had set up a way for her muggle family to contact her if there was an emergency, and she had been worried when she received a message from Dan asking her to call. Chloe wasn't sure what could have happened.
She had tried to tie all loose ends so that things would go as smoothly as possible for the holidays. With Dan and Trixie in Disney World and her mother spending the holidays abroad, Chloe felt her family should be happy and safe for at least a few weeks.
Once Chloe decided to come to London for the holidays, she had been planning non-stop to get away without fuss.
It had been fortunate that despite Lucifer's decision to keep working with her, the end-of-year celebrations at Lux had absorbed most of his time, and he had accepted Chloe's declaration that she didn't have any case so she would be spending some time with her mom while Trixie was away.
Chloe had taken advantage of his distraction with his end-of-the-year 'Party'. He seemed to have taken her at her word and didn't go to the precinct for the few days before her planned departure, leaving her free to ask for a leave of absence without him knowing about it. She had then reached out through the American Ministry's official channels to ask for a portkey, first to New York and then to London.
Within the week, she was ready to go, just in time for the holidays. She had packed up enough clothes for a few weeks, cleaned the fridge, and left for her mom's for the weekend so she could spend some time with her.
Penelope and Chloe had spent three days together—mostly harmoniously—although Penelope was a bit salty because things hadn't worked with Lucifer, and she hadn't kept her opinions to herself. At the end of the long weekend, Chloe was relieved to bid farewell at the airport, where the former actress had a flight to Greece to film a holiday special.
Had something happened to her mom that prevented her from contacting Chloe directly? Dan's message had said to 'call to her convenience', so she figured it wasn't something too urgent, but Chloe had been worrying non-stop, and she had been waiting the morning until it was a reasonable enough hour in Florida for her to call.
It was now 2 pm in London, so it should be around nine back with Dan. Chloe turned on the phone and waited for it to start. Once it was ready, she ignored the missing calls and messages and searched for Dan's contact to call him.
After a few calling tones, Dan's familiar voice answered her call.
"Hello? Chloe? Is that you?"
"Dan!" Chloe exclaimed, relieved. "How are you doing? How are Trixie and your cousins? Is everyone all right? Has something happened to my mom?" she asked quickly, her heart beating too fast while waiting for her ex to answer.
"Hi, Chloe! Yes, we are fine. Penelope is fine, as far as I know. Yes, that is Mom here," Dan said. Chloe could hear her daughter's voice over the phone and felt relieved. "We are fine, Chlo! You don't need to worry. Trixie is here wanting to talk to you" Dan passed the phone to her daughter, and Chloe spent the next few minutes hearing about every sweet the Park offered in more detail than she had ever felt the need to know, followed by a detailed description of the Christmas decorations that Trixie had enjoyed. It didn't seem like her daughter needed a lot of input from Chloe, which was a relief as Chloe took the time to relax and enjoy her daughter's evident happiness and well-being. She didn't think anything terrible would have happened if Dan had left Trixie to talk to her this long, although Chloe had a few words for him once Trixie finished her tale about what an emergency entailed.
After learning about every sweet and every decoration made in the Park and some sweets that should count as decorations according to Trixie's description, the young girl returned the phone to her father, bidding Chloe a merry goodbye. Chloe was finally able to interrogate Dan about the so-called emergency.
"As good as it is to hear about the fun you two are having, I was going to call you tomorrow as we had agreed to", Chloe said to her ex, trying to keep calm. "Why did you ask me to call today, Dan? What was the emergency?"
"I have been receiving non-stop calls from your partner", Dan explained finally, and Chloe felt her heart sink. As much as she had wanted to ignore it, she had suspected that Lucifer would sooner or later try to reach out to her, and he wouldn't be happy to hear that she had asked for a leave of absence from the department. Chloe had hoped, though, that he would at least wait until New Year before he tried to speak directly to her. Given the preparation of his party-slash-orgy, she had heard too much about; she had hoped for him to have too much in his hands to think about her.
"I left a message with Ella in the department if he came looking for me", Chloe explained. "I'm sorry, Dan; I hoped that would be enough for him to leave everyone alone, at least for the holidays."
"What did the message say?" Dan asked. "He sounded panicky over the phone. I mean, he is dramatic at the best of times, but he seemed to think that you were leaving for good."
Chloe sighed in response, trying to remember the exact phrasing of her note.
"I told him that I was leaving for the holidays and that I would return after the new year," Chloe said. "I wished him a happy new year, I think, and wished him the best to him and his friends and family. I don't think there was anything strange in that note," she considered.
"Well, whatever it said, he clearly has read much more into it because he was insistent, saying he needed to talk to you. I tried to keep it contained until you returned, but he was almost ready to look for your mother. I had him promise to leave Penelope alone with the condition to get in contact with you and get you to call him," Dan explained, his tone as angry as usual when talking about Lucifer's antics, although Chloe couldn't blame him this time. She repressed a shudder thinking of Lucifer - and Merlin forgave her, maybe Maze and Eve - going to Greece and talking to Chloe's mom.
"I'm sorry, Dan", Chloe reiterated. "Thank you for trying; I will call him as soon as it's daylight in LA."
"I would call him now; I don't think he is sleeping", Dan said wryly. "My phone is blown up with messages of him over the last few hours asking if I had talked to you already. I am surprised yours isn't the same."
Chloe looked back at her phone, quickly looking at the missing calls and messages; almost all of them were from Lucifer. Now she was paying attention - with a few Linda, Amenadiel and even Maze. And there were nearly 100 missed calls over the last few days. She was surprised that her phone could store so many missed calls, to be honest.
"He had been calling and messaging me; I hadn't looked through it before I called you", Chloe admitted.
Dan's wry laughter reached her ears.
"Yes, I can imagine. That man is a nut-job, Chloe; I don't know what you have ever seen on him. It would be best if you cut ties with him permanently," he urged her, not for the first time.
But for the first time, Chloe agreed. She wouldn't tell him, though. She expected it would only make Dan more aggressive against Lucifer, and she didn't want Dan to make it difficult for himself if they crossed paths again in the future.
It would be better to keep it as civil as possible if they would keep living in the same city. Chloe had lived over 20 years in Los Angeles without crossing paths with Lucifer, and he had been permanently residing there for the last five years before they met - according to him, retired from Hell. So, more likely than not, they would barely, if ever, meet again. Chloe wasn't planning to go back to Lux or ever move in the same circles as Lucifer - and now Eve - move of parties and orgies and the like.
And yes, maybe she was a bit hung up on the orgies, so sue her.
But Chloe knew her own luck, and that probability wasn't usually on her side. So civil it was, and she would move on the best she could and cross her fingers she didn't have to hear about Lucifer Morningstar for a long time until she healed a bit.
But first, she needed to make this call, and according to Dan, Lucifer had somehow figured out what was coming, and he wasn't happy about it.
So, it would be the hard road, which Chloe should have expected.
But Chloe hadn't been a Gryffindor for nothing; as Chloe Decker or Kalina Potter, she had constantly confronted her fate with her head high. She opened the call application and clicked on Lucifer's contact, waiting for him to respond; some of her hoped he wouldn't hear it so she would be off the hook for a bit longer.
"Detective!" Lucifer's anxious but clear voice was immediately in her ear after not even a whole call tone. Of course.
"Hello, Lucifer", Chloe said, her voice as even as she could make it.
"Detective!" Lucifer said more strongly while some background sounds—that Chloe tried not to focus on—faded a bit away. "Where have you been? They said you have taken a leave of absence for the holidays." Lucifer's tone felt reproachful and distrustful to Chloe's ears. Not that she could blame him for the last time she had been gone without notice, but this distrust hardened her resolution about what she had decided to do.
"I am spending the holidays with some old friends," Chloe said vaguely. She might have considered admitting her background at some point—did Lucifer know about magic? It was a question Chloe wouldn't get an answer to now. But at this moment, she was happy she had kept him in the dark. Lucifer couldn't trace her now... if he even wanted to, so she remembered to herself.
"Oh", Lucifer said on the other side. "Some old, religion-inclined friends, maybe?" he asked cynically.
Chloe took a deep breath and then another, her resolution to end this amicably becoming increasingly challenging to follow. Lucifer seemed to want to say something else after a few moments of her silence, but Chloe decided to cut him off.
"No, I won't do this again," she said, trying to keep her voice even. "I have apologised. I have tried to make amends for my mistakes. Lucifer, I know I did something wrong; I have never tried to avoid my responsibility. But I can't atone anymore because I can't change what I have done. I understand I hurt you, but I can't change that either, and if you can't forgive me… I suppose this is it" Chloe took a deep breath, trying not to cry. "I can't stand this torture any longer", she admitted.
"Torture?" she heard Lucifer's choked response on the other side of the phone; the background sounds of the party, orgy or whatever he was doing going louder for a moment like someone had opened a door or Lucifer had maybe moved closer. And it was another knife in Chloe's heart. But she hoped this would be the last one.
"Yes. You placed me on a pedestal, it seems, Lucifer," she sighed. "But I am just human. I was going to fall short sooner than later; it was inevitable. You have been lying and hiding from me from the start, even when you claim not to lie," she continued more forcefully. "You have been running hot and cold with me, giving just enough for me to fall in love with you", another strangled sound, but Chloe didn't let it stop her "... to take it away the next minute and marry some stripper. My mistakes are mine, and I will feel guilty forever for those and many more you don't even know, but I wasn't the only one at fault; this situation has become toxic for me...and you…. I think that's what you have been trying to say to me… I think, with… with Tiernan…and with Eve" Chloe could hear the tears in her voice, but Lucifer's silence - whether in agreement or surprise, she couldn't tell - prompter to finish this. "I wish you all the happiness, Lucifer. I know you are a good man, and you deserve it. I am sorry it won't be with me and that I won't get to see it" She bit her lip, a slight pause before the inevitable end and Lucifer's deafening silence as clear message as she could have expected.
It was the end.
"Goodbye, Lucifer. I love you. Be happy." She broke the connection without waiting for Lucifer's response - which could only cause her more pain - and immediately disconnected the phone and stored it back in her trouser's pocket.
She walked back inside the house, her mission for the following weeks clear. She would have a lovely Christmas and forget all about Lucifer, Hell and Heaven.
And she would decide on her future once her heart didn't feel like something crushed it.