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As Peter entered your shared apartment, he shoved his red and blue uniform into his backpack. It was one of the many that he had lost during his college days, only having found it that afternoon, webbed haphazardly to the side of a dumpster.
He could hear the muffled sounds of music playing in the living room, immediately spotting you lying on the couch when he rounded the corner. He chuckled as you scrolled through some social media feed. You noticed him when he turned off the music, smiling when you realized your roommate was finally home.
“Hey, Parker,” you greeted. “How was work at the lab?”
Peter dropped his backpack onto the floor, and sighed, “Kinda boring today.”
You snorted, tossing a throw pillow at him, “That’s what you get for being a nerd.”
“Ha ha,” he replied, his tone laced with sarcasm, as he rolled his eyes, “very funny.”
“I know I am,” you said. “That’s why you love me so much.”
More than you know, thought Peter. He reached out, lifting your calves in order to sit on the couch. He then allowed them to rest on his lap as he grabbed the TV remote, flicking through the channels until he found the evening news.
The two of you fell into a comfortable silence. Peter watched the news while you texted back and forth with your friend, MJ. Your attention quickly moved to the television when the anchor mentioned New York’s favorite hero.
Peter grunted when you sat up, leaned over him, and grabbed the remote. You then moved back onto the couch beside him as you turned up the volume.
“—stopped a robbery today. No injuries have been reported. Witnesses state that Spider-Man was able to safely evacuate the scene and put a stop to the crime before the arrival of emergency services. Now, to the weather—”
As photos of the masked hero flashed on the screen, you sighed, “He is so hot.”
Peter cleared his throat, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck. Now, a few things to note. First, this was always an odd conversation to have, mostly since you didn’t realize that your roommate just so happened to be Spider-Man. And second, Peter usually ended up feeling guilty whenever he allowed you to, unknowingly, feed his ego with your praises for New York’s friendly neighborhood hero.
But then Peter would remember something very important. He liked you. A lot. And that’s why he couldn’t tell you he was secretly Spider-Man. After all, how would you react to your biggest crush turning out to be your best friend? Especially when he had let you go on and on about how attractive you thought the crime-fighting vigilante was?
You would probably kill him. Or worse — never talk to him again!
But there was also a third note to write down, it was very awkward for Peter to be jealous... of himself. There were times that he couldn’t go to sleep at night with how much embarrassment and self-loathing built up within his chest. Either that or he’d end up sleeping with a grimace on his face.
The news moved on to the weather. Peter almost let out a sigh of relief, but stopped himself when he realized you weren’t done gushing over your celebrity crush.
“He’s definitely the top choice for my list,” you smiled, listening as the weatherman predicted sunny skies for the weekend.
Peter looked over at you, furrowed his eyebrows, and asked, “What list?”
You barely paid him any mind as you responded, “My list of celebrities I’d wanna have sex with—”
“WHAT?!”
You blinked in surprise at Peter’s sudden interruption. His eyes were wide and his face was slowly turning red as he stared at you.
“You’d have sex with Spider-Man?!”
Peter was floored. Sure, you had talked about how you thought Spider-Man was, in your words, ‘hot’, but you had never mentioned that before.
“Uh, obviously!” you scoffed. “I wanna know what’s hiding under those spandex!”
Peter’s jaw practically hit the floor. You couldn’t stop yourself from laughing at the sight, shaking your head as your focus returned to the television. Peter, however, wasn’t going to let go of this information so easily.
“You wouldn’t even go on a date with him first?!”
“Peter, what’s your deal?” you chuckled, furrowing your eyebrows. “You’re being weird. Much more than usual.”
Peter ignored your teasing, and continued, “I mean, what are you gonna do if he takes his mask off and he’s not what you expected?!”
Obviously, you didn’t understand the underlying meaning within his question as you replied, “What are you talking about?! He swings through the city on pure muscle, Pete! He’s gotta be totally ripped under that suit!”
“But what if—?!”
“Okay!” you laughed incredulously, holding up your hands in mock surrender. “I’ll tell you what, we’ll make a deal.”
Peter fell silent. He raised his eyebrows, looking at you with an expectant expression. Realizing he wasn’t going to interrupt you again, you continued, “If I ever meet Spider-Man, I promise you that will ask him on a date before fucking him senseless—”
“Oh my—!”
You burst into laughter as Peter stood up and stomped away. You could hear his footsteps echo throughout your apartment as he escaped to his bedroom, leaving you unaware of the bright red blush slowly making its way onto his cheeks.
The weather reports had been wrong. So, so wrong. After spending the day with MJ, the sky had turned dark and cloudy on your way back to your apartment. Rain quickly followed, leaving you without an umbrella or, at the very least, a jacket. You had also made the mistake of forgetting your wallet at home, which meant you didn’t have money to pay for a cab or your MetroCard for the subway.
You still had four blocks to go before you would finally be home, but you were still miserable, completely soaked to the bone by the cold rain. Rounding a corner, you gasped in surprise as a flash of red and blue suddenly appeared in front of you.
“Hey!”
Of course. Of course, this is happening now.
“Hi,” you responded.
Spider-Man chuckled beneath his mask. He placed his hands on his hips and tilted his head, “You’re not really dressed for rain, ya know?”
“Well, I—uh—I forgot—”
He laughed at your stuttering. Meanwhile, you were stuck in place, staring in awe at New York’s prized hero. Your celebrity crush was standing in front of you, and you were stuck, trying to recalculate like a GPS on someone’s phone.
“Here, I bought you this at the bodega down the street.”
It was then you noticed the plastic bag in his hand. He squatted, reaching into the bag to pull out an umbrella. He opened it before holding it out for you to grab. Unsure, you took it from his hands, still stunned by his presence. He was way hotter in person. You could practically see his abs hidden beneath his costume as he rose back to his full height.
You blinked in surprise as he unfolded a brand new rain jacket, ripped off the price tag, and then moved to stand behind you. Without a word, he helped you slip the garment on. Returning to his original place in front of you, he then zipped the jacket, making sure it fit you properly.
“There! A perfect fit—! Hey, are you okay?”
You snapped out of your daze, and quickly said, “Yeah! Yeah, I’m fine! Uh—thanks!”
You felt heat rise beneath your skin, embarrassed when he let out another swoon worthy chuckle. He was standing so close to you, looking at you through the eyes of his costume. You couldn’t help but notice the curious stares of passing strangers.
You didn’t give him a chance to reply, simply saying, “I have to go. My roommate’s probably wondering why I’m not home yet.”
Without another word, you walked around him, tightly clutching the umbrella, desperately wanting to slap yourself for being so caught off guard by the presence of a man you didn’t even know.
Meanwhile, beneath his mask, Peter had a wide grin on his face. He had never seen you so shy before. Before he could stop himself, he called out in a teasing voice, “I thought I was the top choice for your list though?!”
His eyes widened upon realizing what had just come from his mouth. Shit, he thought. Shit! Shit! Shit!
He felt himself turning red as you paused. Slowly, you turned to look at him with a confused expression, and asked, “What did you just say?”
The masked vigilante struggled for an answer as you stared at him. Your mind was moving a mile a minute, piecing the meaning of his words together.
Peter felt his panic rising while your eyes slowly widened. Your mouth fell open as you stared at him with a grimace of disbelief, and exclaimed, “You little bitch! Are you serious?!”
Peter winced in embarrassment, thinking about how this situation must have looked to the people around them. The two of you were receiving quite a few stares as the surrounding strangers wondered why someone would be yelling at Spider-Man of all people.
“How could you let me ramble on and on for months about that stuff?!” you shouted. “What the fuck, dude?! What is wrong with you?!”
“Hey, Spidey!” called out a voice. “What’d you do to ‘em, man?!”
Peter had only glanced at the small crowd of people for a moment, but even so, when turned back to you, he found that you had disappeared. He placed his hands over his masked face, groaning loudly in frustration at his own stupidity.
Peter came home late that night. Upon coming through the door, he could see the dull light of a lamp coming from the living room. You were sitting in your usual spot on the couch, silently watching a Netflix show as you curled up under a blanket.
Quietly, he went to sit next to you, focusing his attention on the television screen. It only took him a few minutes for him to break the silence, “Are you still mad at me?”
“No.”
He finally looked at you. However, your eyes were still concentrated on the television. Peter allowed a small smile to make an appearance when you lifted up the corner of your blanket as a signal for him to join you.
He leaned into you, allowing you to drape an arm around his shoulder and over his chest. His head took refuge on your shoulder, which led you to resting your chin atop his dark hair.
“So...” he smirked, “since you’re not mad anymore... and since you’ve officially met Spider-Man, who just so happens to be me... does that mean you’re going to ask me on a date like you said you would?”
“Yeah, okay,” you groaned, shoving him away from you and standing from your spot on the couch, wrapping the blanket around your shoulders. “Your cuddling privileges have been revoked, Parker.”
He grinned widely at the humorous tone in your voice, watching with sparkling eyes as you began walking away from him, “You don’t wanna go on a date with me?”
You paused in the doorway of your bedroom, turning to look back at him, “Depends.”
“On what?” he asked, leaning his chin against his forearm on the back of the couch and furrowing his eyebrows.
You smiled arrogantly, giving him a once-over before meeting his eyes one last time. You raised your eyebrows expectantly, and then asked, “Will I get to see what you’ve been hiding under those spandex?”