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Yearning and Longing and Everything in Between

Summary:

Sumeruian guard Sethos yearns for the Prince of Inazuma, told over chapters of stolen glances and pining hearts

Notes:

I'll be honest guys- I have a very immature and very huge crush on a guy at my big age and I want to go delulu by projecting my thoughts on my recent brainrot- Sethoscara. Enjoy or not, because this was written for me and me only

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter Text

“Enter, your Royal Highness, Scaramouche” A strong voice bellowed as the door at the end of the hallway slid open gracefully, unveiling a translucent figure stepping inside the room.

 

The man was short in stature, wearing billowing sleeves and drapes of his clothes, lilac in color, tied together elegantly by red strings. He represents anything except what you would expect of a typical ‘Prince’. See Prince Tartaglia from the neighboring kingdom for example, he is an image of what you would expect of a young prince who is not set to take over the kingdom over his elder siblings yet carries the noble duty of representing his family and does that with composure.

 

Now compare that with the porcelain skinned prince of this kingdom, ruled over by their matriarchal ruler Raiden Shogun and her prized possession, quite literally, her benevolent son whom she had lost and gained (a story saved for another day), scrubbed off all blemishes, fresh as a dove in falling snow. When he entered the hall, his footsteps were muffled by soft silken socks and feet obscured by lengthy fabric. The only skin that was visible were his milky arms and small face.

 

Sethos curls his fingers over the polearm he held to his side tightly. So, this was the famed prince he was to guard over.

 

As if those many scary guards the Shogun had weren't enough, she had to ship reinforcement all the way from the Sumeru kingdom.

 

Although the duty became more apparent when Sethos laid his eyes on Scaramouche’s face when he lifted the veil over his head to speak to his mother in a low voice. It was a face men would go to war for.

 

Looks aside, putting a face to the story he had heard about the man, the torture, and the pain he had to endure in the hands of the maniac from their hometown and his slow healing process and the slightly crazy mother who dotes on her son whom she neglected in the past, stirred something in Sethos’ heart. It made things seem all the more real, not a fable told across the streets of Sumeru.

 

If there were any traces of hesitancy that existed up until that moment, they were replaced by an even more intense and an unspeakable feeling just at that moment. Sethos swore he would never, ever let anyone harm Scaramouche, let alone anyone even entertain that line of thought.

 

He would, in his power, do all that he can so that no man would ever dream of laying their hand on him just like that man who had brought shame to his homeland. And he swore upon his name for it.

 


Life in the kingdom of Raiden Shogun was relatively easy compared to the rumors that were spread by Cyno to other soldiers of Sumeru. Raiden Shogun or rather her people were welcoming and treated Sethos and his small group of friends who had come to serve Scaramouche, with the utmost respect and provided them with everything they wanted and more, with no room to complain.

 

They would invite them to train together every other day and occasionally to share tips and tricks on weapon handling and war strategies. As time passed and the group had gotten close, Sethos and his group were invited for drinking sessions.

 

Life was good. Awesome indeed. It was everything Sethos dreamt of and more. Training, friends, tasks, tasty food, stories and wine. Yet there was something missing. The stirring feeling that Scaramouche evoked the first time he laid his eyes on him, the dull ache that Sethos carried around for the first few days was beginning to fade and was replaced by stale boredom.

 

Sethos needed something, anything, that could spice things up, shake him to practice more, give him the courage to finally raise his bow to compete with General Gorou, a master in bow.

 

Quietly slipping away from the drunken crowd, he wandered from corridor to corridor, taking in all information he could gain. The paintings told stories of Raiden Shogun and her twin, the pain of losing her son depicted by the doll she created, commemorated into a vivid painting hung across the wall, a lantern that looked out of place, probably a gift from Liyue. Standing out from them- lightning imagery, a hell a lot of them, and all of them posing to be intimidating along with the multiple weapons that hung every-damn-where.

 

“You” A soft voice speaks over the hushed silence and flickering of the lantern “How did you find I was here?” In the dead quiet of the night, appeared Scaramouche, like a spirit.

 

Sethos turns around and his heart skips a beat. An obvious feeling after being caught roaming around where he isn’t supposed to. And another feeling- a rush, a thrill. It was exciting. Being caught. Knowing the punishment wasn’t going to be severe because he knew deep down Scaramouche wouldn’t tell this to anyone.

 

“I didn’t necessarily search for you. I was wandering around in the dark, drunk and happened to examine this beautiful blade. Truly magnificent bladework” Scaramouche’s shoulders relaxed after the words minutely. He was still dressed in billowy clothes yet his veil was gone. The lantern highlighted how pale his skin was and how much they brought out his beautiful eyelids. Yet his strong facial features were not too overpowering and complemented his doll-like appearance perfectly. His eyes, however, conveyed that he was still onguard.

 

“Leave before you cause unnecessary trouble for you and me”

 

“Woah. How could I possibly know that you just so happened to be in the room next to where I was standing. It was a mere coincidence. No one is going to see my head off for that” Sethos jokes, yet he was familiar with the rumors that spread amongst the lower guards on how Raiden once gouged the eyes off one of the servants for looking the wrong way at her son. Any unauthorized visit, let alone a chat with the Prince, in the middle of the night, when his location is meant to be a secret and keeps changing every once in a while, could very possibly send Sethos to Sumeru in the best case scenario and to Celestia in the worst case scenario.

 

“No need to be so on-guard, my Prince. I am your guard here, after all. I promise not to tell anyone of our secret rendezvous. If anyone asks why I met you, tell them that I wanted to introduce myself and ask you whether you wanted any errands to be run”

 

Scaramouche, for a second, was dumbfounded by the absolute nonsense this pretty guard was spouting. Does he hold no value for his life? His excuse was pathetic. No one in their right mind would ever come up to him and ask for any errand to be run. It would only cast more suspicion on the Sumeruian guard if he were to actually spout that nonsense as his excuse. Scaramouche was literally gobsmacked; he had no idea what to answer.

 

Come to think of it, no one has ever asked to run an errand for him.

 

“Kujou Sara would skin you alive if you say this to her”

 

Sethos actually pursed his lips and his face sobered up for a moment. He remembered the feared General Kujou Sara, knowing she would sniff this meeting out sooner or later and will hunt him down.

 

“So-” Scaramouche began “Tell this to anyone who asks you anything. Tell them that I was the one who stepped out momentarily to alert the guard to bring me a sweet- secretly. And since you happened to be around at the moment, I dismissed you and retreated to my room for the night.” Scaramouche would never, ever let himself be embarrassed for the sake of a total stranger, ever. But this man struck him differently, for he did not want the guard to be caught in trouble. Scaramouche doubts if even he knows the reason why.

 

“Did you end up getting the sweet though?”

 

“Does that really matter?” Scaramouche sounded annoyed and Sethos enjoyed hearing it. He wanted to hear it again. He loved it. The mental image he had built up of the Prince as this soft-spoken painting being crumpled by the reddened face, annoyed voice and creases around his eyebrows.

 

“Well yeah, because there wasn’t any guard you flagged down to get your sweet”

 

“As soon as I saw you, I dropped the idea”

 

“I can get you something. Tell the guards that you sent me to get you that sweet. I am the go-to guy to get things done around here”

 

“You’re not from Inazuma. And people here know that I wouldn’t dare make a non-native Inazuman to run an errand for me”

 

“But what if you craved a Sumeruian sweet?”

 

“Why am I having this conversation?” Scaramouche mumbled to himself and turned to move into his room. Before he could slide his door shut, Sethos’s hand instinctively shot up and held it “Tell me, have you tried our infamous candied ajilenakh nut?”

 

“I do not want to talk to you ever again”

 

“I am taking it as a no then. Then I shall make sure that you try them before I leave” Before Sethos could propose to bring the nuts to Scaramouche’s room the next day, the door shut in his face. The lantern’s glow highlighted the shadow of Scaramouche leaving but Sethos smiled wide. He knew, in his heart, Scaramouche heard his words. And Sethos couldn’t wait to sneak up on him and make sure that he tasted those candied nuts.

 


“What were you thinking of, speaking to an outsider in the middle of the night?” Raiden stepped inside the living quarters of her son, only used during the day time, a modest room surrounded by high level of security at all times. This time however, all the guards were ordered to be outside, for Raiden did not want anyone to know of her son’s unauthorized meeting with Sethos, whatever the reason might be.

 

“I-” started Scaramouche, before sealing his mouth shut. He knew about his mother. For someone who was once neglectful, she risked and braved her own life to save him and bring him back. What she wanted after his rescue was that he listen to her words. Scaramouche obliged, for saving his life and greater than that, for saving his soul, from being shattered beyond repair. He molded himself perfectly the way she wanted, not even his thoughts were tainted by external entities.

 

That also meant Raiden knew when and how Scaramouche would act at any given time.

 

“Tell me what you said to him. Why did he seek you out?”

 

“He stumbled across me accidentally”

 

“Your next step should have been to report it. What vapid desires did you hold that caused you to speak to an outsider of our nation, in the middle of our night” Raiden knew as soon as the words left her mouth that she should have framed them better but she had more pressing matters to attend to.

 

“I didn’t realize craving a sweet was a salacious desire, mother” Scaramouche never spoke back to his mother ever since he was back from Sumeru, something Raiden Shogun never experienced before. Her son became her puppet, nodding along and following everything according to her wishes, to a shocking extent, she would be in disbelief at his every action and his every word.

 

At this moment however, there was something in his eyes that reflected the old Kabukimono she had once picked up off the street. The name long forgotten yet the eyes sparkled the same way when Kabukimono first refused the offer of being adopted by her, questioning why an all-powerful ruler as her would want a weak, measly one as him to be the prince when there were other able-bodied and educated men who would fare better.

 

The eyes of Kabukimono, before he was tainted by the desires of selfish humans who corrupted his pure heart. The eyes which longed for the simplest of desires. Like the ones staring back at him, who craved sweets and could not possibly understand why his mother would make a huge deal out of it.

 

Instead of what should have been anger that flooded Raiden Shogun- anger at the Prince for yet again, seeking measly human desires, it was yearning. A yearning to see Kabukimono, her Kabukimono, when he first learnt how to be human. When he first learnt how to love and hate, show what he liked and disliked. Show his true self- like a son would to his mother.

 

“What did you ask him for?” Whatever the complicated feelings were inside of her stayed within and did not show in her voice nor her face.

 

“A sweet from his homeland”

 

Raiden Shogun opened her mouth to say something but closed it immediately, puzzling Scaramouche.

 

“You will get them after your dinner tonight” With that she left the room and the world that stood paused resumed, with the guards and his personal assistants filing into the room and began tinkering with his outfit and hair.

 


As the day continued as usual, a heavy sinking feeling nestled in his chest, occupying his mind as he did his chores mindlessly. A feeling of helplessness. A feeling of being left out in the dark, when he craved for information. What happened to the loose mouth, no qualms guard, whose name he was unaware of, what happened to him, where was he, and where was he going to get these candied nuts from? Will Scaramouche ever get to taste those nuts?

 

As the sun finally set across the hazy mountains and rain began drizzling down onto the living quarters, Scaramouche awaited the guards who would come to pick him up roughly around this time to escort him to his secret chamber.

 

Instead, he heard the steps of a single person entering the room. It was unlike the footsteps of any Inazuman soldier.

 

Could it possibly be-

 

“You” Scaramouche turned his head so fast to look at the man entering the room, the man was taken aback by the reaction.

 

“Yes, it’s me” The man laughed sheepishly. Scaramouche’s heart skipped but he couldn’t reason out why. Maybe it was the bruises over his eyes and his cheeks that made him feel guilty or maybe it was the thrill of meeting someone new in his mundane life that excited him, or perhaps it was his immature heart admiring the lean yet built body and honey-golden skin, beautiful hair and features on the man or the satisfaction that all of this happened and he was not burdened to keep this meeting a secret from his mother because she was definitely aware.

 

“I’m back with what you requested for, your Highness”

 

“And possibly more, one would assume,” Scaramouche said, eyeing Sethos’ injuries, and the beautiful cloth folded around the candied nuts that the guard dangled in front of him. Sethos touched his cheek and let out a wide grin.

 

“Hehe, it was alright. General Gorou did not go easy on me. Thankfully, Kujou Sara interrupted right before things could get more serious” Thanking the Tengu for the second time in his life, Scaramouche reached out for his hand. He hated sweets. He could not resist the nuts. Maybe it was not the nuts that he yearned for. The stupid brat who got himself beat up because he wanted to chit-chat with the prince. That stupid brat who-

 

“Oh where are my manners, here you go” He handed them politely and watched at Scaramouche intently

 

“You don’t have to look at me like that” Scaramouche chided

 

“Didn’t know that you got that tongue in you” The guard wondered out loud

 

“Maybe I should call General Gorou to finish what he started”

 

“I’m sorry” The man sounded genuinely scared. General Gorou maintained a fair relationship with the Sumeruian soldiers so the mystery soldier must have seen things for him to react this way.

 

“This dish is crunchy” Scaramouche commented thoughtfully

 

“And water is wet” Sethos commented without thinking and immediately clamped his hand around his mouth, muttering a sorry behind his palm.

 

As the rain pitter pattered outside, an equally melodious laugh broke out from Scaramouche.

 

The drizzle, combined with the chill interior chambers, flickering light from the lanterns in the wall and a beautiful man beside him, Sethos suddenly felt the room spin.

 

Is this- Why is the Prince laughing and why is it making him warm on the inside?

 

“Tell me your name”

 

Any clever comment Sethos would have thought of at any given time dissolved in his mouth

 

“Sethos”

 

“I’ll see you around, Sethos”

 

“Likewise, my Prince”

 

“It's Prince, your Royal Highness” Scaramouche commented yet his voice held no disdain but was instead, Sethos daresay, teasing.

 

“Yes, my Prince, your Royal Highness”

 

“I'm not your Prince”

 

“We’ll see about that” Sethos winked and disappeared, heart beating loudly in his chest.

 

Either he was going to get his head chopped off or start having an unrequited, passionate one-sided love for the freaking Prince of Inazuma.

 

Either meant death.

 

(Or was his love truly one-sided as he thought?)