Work Text:
This place was awful. The smell of death? Sure, I could take that, but the suffocating feeling of selflessness coming my way? Not at all. So many people lined up to bat for me, and I never did anything to deserve it.
What was the reason? What did I do for these people to make them want to jump in and save me? Why were so many dying just to prevent my death?
Yes, I would do the same for any of them, but that wasn't a good enough reason. Why do they care about me? I am a leach. I take advantage of those around me. If someone offers something to me, I take it without hesitation.
If someone has something I want, I take it without remorse. If it turns out to be something they didn't want me to take, then I will apologize. I will mean the apology, I will tell myself to do better, but we all know by now that that isn't possible.
I am not capable of being a good and worthy person. I know what it takes to be good, I preach to others the importance of being good and I offer advice and instruction for being worthy, but I never act on it.
I must be a terrible person deep down.
It's been made clear enough for me to see that I am an evil parasite on all good souls who cross my path.
So why?
Why was everyone here?
Why was my execution something worth dying to stop?
Let it happen.
Grieve for me if you must, but let the execution happen.