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*.·: ·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*
The following morning, you met Maria to complete some paperwork and collect an ID badge for the building. Her office was quite simple, with a dim light shining from the shield logo on the wall.
“Since you technically don’t exist, creating an alias will be easy. Explaining to the government we retrieved you from a HYDRA base would raise some alarms. As far as they’re concerned you’re..?” She waved her wrist for you to answer, typing away at a computer on her desk. “Give me a name, don’t make me pick one.”
You remember becoming fascinated with a phoenix statue when you were first let out of the compound. Fènghuáng Ashryver Yùe , you wrote on a piece of paper in front of you. Code name- Dragon . Since there was no way to track how old you were due to the serum, Maria scrambled a random date and year to write for your birthday. She Snapped a quick photo and placed it on your badge. All the government knows is you went off the grid years ago.
“It's a shame you won’t let me take a picture without the mask.” You felt your eyes soften at her comment, knowing that if she saw you without it she’d most likely find you repulsing. "Welcome to the team, agent," Maria said with a wink as she handed you your badge before walking out of her office.
“ Thank you, Commander. ”
~~~~
"A strong name for a strong agent, I must say," Dr. Lee joked as she looked at your badge. It was reassuring to finally have some form of identity after having it taken away for so long, and a small smile appeared on your lips. "I’m curious—were you ever given a name before you became the top soldier?" You sat on a couch in Dr. Lee's office as she examined your new badge, your mask resting on the edge of her desk. You couldn’t help but notice how tidy her office was, far more organized than it had been during your last visit.
“ Yes. I don’t remember anymore. We were their property. Identities were not important. ”
You were not entirely sure why the two of you were aware of your names, it was just known in your brain since you could remember. Perhaps you had given it to one another or yourselves, that was the preferred answer. Leaving your name as the one thing that was yours while you were in that horrid place.
Mentioning this knowledge once had led to a severe beating, an early sign of deviation that explained the semi-failed experiment you were part of. Eventually, you managed to repress that knowledge once you became the top soldier. Finally repressing the knowledge once you become the top soldier, at least that’s what you had hoped they believed as well.
“I guess they really drilled that into you once your training began and you were assigned missions.” Dr.Lee took another glance at the badge before handing it off to you. “Ashryver? From the Throne of Glass series? I like it. By the way, my English name is Lysandra.”
Unable to practice sign language while your knuckles were healing she gave you books to read to keep you occupied. “English name?”
“It’s much easier to pronounce, plus sounds cooler than my Chinese name. You know Maria seems to have taken an interest in you, hope you aren’t trying to steal her away or I’ll have to make you disappear.” Your smile dropped and your blood ran cold. You held your hands up in the air and she began to laugh. “I’m kidding, but she’s right, you do have a cute smile. Besides, I know you have a thing for Romanoff.”
You looked at her confused, your breathing froze for a moment. There was an odd tightening in your chest, something to figure out later. “ I beg your pardon? ”
“Sitting next to her during movie nights, the training sessions and your face just confirms everything. It’s cute seeing you finally found a teammate to warm up to.” She kicked off her shoes and began to eat a bowl of ramen so fast it was like she hadn’t eaten in days.
“ So you and Maria…are close? ” She started to choke for a moment, and after slamming her fist into her chest her breathing returned to normal.
“Of course. I mean, we’ve been working for the same agency for quite some time now. I was once a field medic, I wouldn’t have made it so far without her or Cho.” Lysandra scoffs for a moment and leans back in her chair. Tossing her glasses on the desk and folding her arms. “Having a support system when life throws curveballs makes them easier to overcome. I’m glad you found someone who can relate to your situation, and give you a better understanding of how to adjust with the rest of society. Forming different types of relationships is normal and balancing them out with your own is better than being alone.” She plopped a few books on the different relationships that exist to help you understand better.
“ We’re both spies, observant, it’s instinct.” Wanda has finally stopped trying to tap into your mind whenever you enter the room. You didn’t mind when either one lowered their guard around you and treated you like a person. “I don’t mind her presence.” The need to be close to someone left a painful sore on the sides of your lips.
~~~~
"Don’t you think you’re getting a bit too close to this patient? You usually go to great lengths to connect, but I’ve never seen you push it this far." Maria entered Lysandra’s office, in the middle of getting ready to head to her room.
“Before I came here, I was arranged to be married to a man I did not know. My family was terribly old-fashioned. I had no particular talent in anything nor did I excel in school. So instead of becoming a stay-at-home mom I fled on the first boat out. Thankfully SHIELD needed combat nurses at a desperate level. I’m grateful that a commanding officer saw my desperation for a job, saw my inexperience, and pulled me out of there before I was blown to smithereens.” Their eyes met from across the room, and Lysandra’s knees melted like usual whenever staring into Maria’s. “I got a second chance, and so do they.”
“You were terrible out on the field.” Breaking the silence the two of you laughed at the memory.
“I’m not THAT bad anymore, at least now I know how to fire a gun.” She had a big smile on her face. Coat and bag in hand she held the door open.
“Don’t make me regret it.”
~~~~
You entered the lounge, just in time for “movie night”. Expecting to find Natasha and Wanda in their usual places you came to find the couch empty.
“Friday?” You raised, looking around the room seeing no sign of anyone being in the room for quite some time.
“Yes Agent…?” The robotic voice chimes from the speakers in the room.
“ Where is everyone? ” You signed hoping it would be picked up by the cameras.
“Agent Romanoff and Maximoff left on a mission 2 hours ago.”
“ Thank you. ” Now that you think about it, the place was a bit emptier than usual. An odd feeling surfaced, not knowing what to do. You’ve followed patterns all your life. To be on your own with free will wasn’t something you were familiar with at all.
You heard the doc and Commander laughing in the hall, you slipped into an empty room to avoid drawing attention. Once they passed by you went straight toward your cell, and that odd pinching feeling in your chest began to surface. A familiar emptiness begins to spread throughout your body.