Work Text:
"Hey-o."
"Ah, Jesus. The hell you doing here?"
"Well, I couldn't help but notice that you could use some he—"
"—I don't need help. Least of all from—Hey!"
"This looks pretty important. How the hell did it fall off?"
"The usual."
"What, Deadpools? Lokis? A stampede of super-powered animal versions of super-powered weirdos?"
"No, you dumbass. Rough terrain. Rocks. ...What super-powered animals have you run into here?"
"Oh, no, not me. I heard there was a kangaroo Wolverine a while back. Or was it a wallaby?"
"Probably a wallaby." / "Probably a wallaby."
"Jinx." / "Jinx."
"Damn it." / "You wish."
"Of course I wish... Now what are you doing?"
"Move over. I've got this."
"Back off."
"Aw, c'mon. You see that? And this? Just need a little bit of welding."
"By you? Fuck no."
"It'll work! Trust me."
"Ha."
"I've done it before! If you're so worried I'll screw it up, then you can... You know."
"I can what? You're gonna have to use your words."
"You can stop me."
"Like I need your permission to do that."
"Argh, you know what I mean!"
"No, I don't."
"You can, y'know, take over! Like, take control, or whatever it is you do."
"...Are you screwing with me? Is the pseudo-weather messing with your brain?"
"You wanna fix it or not? Or are you hoping to hitch a ride?"
"Gross."
"Not with me. Although..."
"Yeah, your brain is definitely fried, and you want me to trust you to weld."
"For fuck's sake, I want you to let me fix something, anything, even this... nostalgic relic of a bygone era."
"So you're just bored? This isn't you trying to be heroic or some shit?"
"This is me helping myself, and I'm so beyond bored. There isn't a word for what I am. None of 'em describe me: stir-crazy, cabin fever, climbing the walls, an inch away from—"
"—Okay, okay, I get it! ...Fine. Flame up or whatever."
"Yes! ...So..."
"Jesus, cut the small talk. Focus your ADHD and then leave me alone."
"What if I don't wanna leave you alone?"
"Are you looking to die, because I sure as hell am not entertainment."
"Yeah, no, it's more like you come with the car. I wanna hang around this car."
"No."
"But it's so shiny."
"Best I can do is let you hang behind this car. You finished yet?"
"Almost... There. Give it a sec to cool."
"Might wanna move, Matchstick."
"It's Torch, and you—ugh, that felt so wrong!"
"You're right. Candlestick fits better."
"Jeez... Think it'll run?"
"Only one way to find out."
"Can I—"
"—No."
"You really are no fun for an arsonist."
"...See any smoke?"
"Nope. You?"
"No. It sounds fine, too. For now. ...Thanks."
"Was that a—"
"Just to be clear, if you ever think about stealing my ride, remember: I'll probably either kill the engine or explode it."
"You'd really blow this beauty up?"
"Scorching my second favorite car, to get rid of you? Sure."
"Well, shit. Duly noted."