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It starts with an innocent kiss on the forehead.
Maybe not Shu's feelings. Nor Luca's. But for their relationship to start in full motion.
It happens on the night after summer break started, with Mysta phoning their group to meet up at the beach. Ike brings the guitar. Vox has wine coolers. And all Shu has are a bag of chips and his heart flip flopping at the sight of Luca in a plain, baggy t-shirt.
Laughter soon fills their small space as they dig their bare feet on the sand. Mysta would strum the guitar, followed by Luca's heartfelt bastardized rendition of I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing with Vox. Meanwhile, Ike and Shu have valiantly attempted to start a bonfire, only managing to create a small fire to warm them over the sea breeze. When the fire dies down after a good five minutes, they just shrug and laugh it off, carefree as always.
As the night wears on, Ike starts to recount ghost stories. It is getting a bit colder, and yet Shu can't seem to mind, what with Luca pressed firmly on his side.
Or maybe that is just the wine cooler making his body heat up. He doesn't know.
Vox then proposes they play a rendition of truth or dare, calling it the Rotten Egg after seeing how spooked Mysta and Luca are getting from the stories.
“Michael,” he starts. “If you don't swim in the ocean, you're a rotten egg!”
It isn't long until Ike is back in the circle, drenched from the sea water almost naked except for his boxers. Vox is kind enough to drape his own jacket around Ike's shoulders as he dries himself off.
“Okay, now it's my turn.” Ike clasps his hands together, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Luca!” He calls out, startling him. “Kiss Shu or you're a rotten egg.”
That…
That is just unfair.
Ike knows.
And perhaps the others have a clue as well because Shu can hear Vox and Mysta hollering as Luca grabs his face and plants a kiss on his forehead.
Maybe.
Maybe they didn't scream in excitement. Maybe it's just Shu conjuring those up and that it is silent all along because all he can feel is Luca.
Luca and his soft lips.
Luca and the warmth of his palms on Shu's cheeks.
Luca and the gentle way he touched him.
Maybe. Maybe.
But that is the start.
﹏ ☼ ﹏
With college entrance exams looming around the corner, Shu finds himself enrolled in cram school for the whole of summer. In some days after classes, he will receive a text from Luca asking if he is finally free from “receiving further education”.
“Yes, I am done furthering my studies,” comes Shu's reply. “Are you done furthering your training?”
As part of their school's track team, Luca has likewise found training to busy himself during their summer break. His coach has placed him under a rigorous regime, deeming him the star athlete after breaking records upon records in their region. Oftentimes, this would result in Luca collapsing on his bed from exhaustion and declining invites to hang out.
It's why whenever the opportunity to spend time with him presents itself, Shu grabs it.
When classes ends, he is greeted by that familiar smile beaming at him as Luca shouts his name out.
“No training today?”
Luca shakes his head. “Coach gave me two days off.” He grins, and it's the kind that Shu knows spells trouble. “Race you to the konbini, Shu!” And then he takes off, leaving Shu spluttering in disbelief as he picks up his pace.
“Hey, I thought you should be resting!” And “That's unfair! I'm so kicking your butt at Street Fighter!” He would shout indignantly, only to be responded with a hearty laugh until eventually, Luca slows down so Shu can catch up to him.
His lungs burn and his heart is racing from the physical exertion. As an apology (he isn't really apologetic, Shu knows), Luca offers to carry Shu's bag.
“Need to show off my guns, too.” Luca proceeds to flex his arm.
“My bag isn't even that heavy.” Shu rolls his eyes, snickering fondly at his antics. This guy, really. He doesn't need to display his physical prowess.
His silliness is what charmed Shu, anyway.
Shu can't help himself but to smile so stupidly as he listens to Luca recall the time a woman who was supposedly walking in front of him at the train station disappeared all of a sudden.
“It's like she teleported, Shu!” Luca exclaims, his hands curled into a fist in excitement. “I told Vox about this, but he just looked at me as if I lost my mind.”
“Are you sure she really teleported?” Shu raises a brow. “What if she actually found the entrance to Hogwarts?”
A ridiculous challenge for such a ridiculous event.
Luca then proceeds to hum the theme of Harry Potter, with Shu chiming along until they reach the konbini. The heat of the summer sun is beating down on them, so the cold blast of the air conditioning is such a refreshing welcome. Wilson, who is working part time for the summer break, greets them.
“‘Ey, Willy!” Luca grins. “Let me see your balls, Willy!”
“Shut the fuck up, Luca!” Comes Wilson's reply, laughing as Luca goes up to the counter
While they catch up, Shu goes straight to the chest freezer, his hands seemingly moving in autopilot as he reaches for a cookies and cream cone and a pint of chocolate chip cookie dough.
He deserves a pint, he justifies. After all the studying he's done and the running Luca put him through, a little treat won't hurt.
Just as he is debating whether he should buy some senbei to snack on while he reviews or if he should go for the Jagariko, he hears Wilson say “no, Luca, you can't look at my balls! What will your date say when you're out here wanting to see another man's testicles?”
So here's the thing. Wilson, alongside Alban and Elira, has always come to tease them whenever he sees the opportunity to do so during lunch breaks when Luca would sit on his chair backwards, stealing pieces of omelet rolls from Shu's bento.
“You're just jealous because Shu's mom prepared an extra tamagoyaki just for me.”
“Oh, he's mother-approved!” Alban whispers, conspiratorial. Elira would then give Shu a smug look, to which Shu would just say “nah, she just worries about her son not getting enough nutrition because someone is stealing her son's lunch.”
Suffice to say Shu is used to the teasing grins from his friends. He is used to ignoring them, if not laughing a confused “what?” because it's just not true.
But now?
Is it still not true?
When he goes up to the counter with the snacks on hand, Luca is standing stock still, his mouth opening and closing as if a goldfish breathing over water.
His cheeks are tinted pink.
Ah.
I see.
Shu chuckles as he pulls out his coin purse. “How much for everything, Wilson?”
﹏ ☼ ﹏
Cram school has just finished. And as if on cue, he sees Luca waiting for him outside, his back on Shu with his right foot propped on the wall behind him. His hair is bundled up into a low ponytail, perhaps to ease some of the heat. Luca doesn't notice Shu initially, too engrossed in scrolling on his phone.
He's probably checking the news for the hurdle in this year's Olympics. Or maybe he's scrolling through Vines and trying to find the perfect questionable video to send to Mysta.
Feeling mischievous, Shu creeps up on him and, when he's close, blows air on Luca's exposed nape.
“What the hell!” Luca shrieks as he covers his nape with his free hand. When he turns around, he sees Shu's grin. “Shuuuuuuu!!!”
“That's me.” Shu laughs at the pout forming on Luca's face, his lips pursing and his eyebrows slanting in offense. He feels the urge to grab Luca's cheeks and squish them, to see how much more his lips can pucker.
And so he does just that.
Luca whines out his name indignantly, earning some more amused laughter from Shu.
In his mirth, Shu must have missed the glint in Luca's eyes because the next thing he feels is Luca pressing a kiss on the finger at the corner of his lip.
Shu lets go of his face, as if scalded. But with the way Luca is grinning at him and with the way his face feels hot at the contact, Shu thinks he might have just been burned by Luca after all.
﹏ ☼ ﹏
Saturday sees Luca, Sonny, and Ren picking Shu up from his house, all of them donning yukata for the festival. Shu tries his best to avert his eyes from Luca's chest, his yukata open and parted to show off his pectorals.
He may or may not have failed in keeping his eyes to himself.
Upon arriving at the festival, Luca sees a booth selling masks and immediately pulls the group towards it, urging them to buy.
“That banana looks so goofy ahh, Shu!” He points in amusement as Shu shows off his mask of a banana wearing sunglasses.
They wave to their other friends as they pass by. Some of them are in big groups, some are on dates. Zali and Wilson playfully seethe as they watch Vanta offer his hand to Uki by the harbor.
The area gets fairly crowded as the day turns to dusk. Sonny manages to catch a goldfish while Shu fails to hit any target at the shooting game.
“Counter-Strike is better,” he mumbles as he watches successfully toss rings at bowling pins.
At one point, Shu got lost among the crowd after getting distracted by the row of food stalls, from candied apples to the delicious smell of grilled squid. When he turns around, his friends are nowhere to be found no matter how much Shu stands on his tiptoes to try and spot them.
“Shubert!” Shu perks up at Luca's voice calling out to him. Soon enough, Luca is beside him, sweat dotting his face. “I thought I lost you! Where did you go?”
Shu chuckles. “You worry too much, Luca,” he says. “Y'all just walk too fast. I was just looking at those apples.” As if on cue, Shu's stomach growls. They have been at the festival for hours, too lost in trying to win prizes from the parlor games that Shu doesn'trl realize he hasn't eaten yet since he left for the festival.
It must have been loud because Luca laughs. He grabs Shu's wrist and pulls him towards the booth with the apples. “One, please!” He tells the seller and promptly pulls out his coin purse.
“What are you doin– hey, you don't have to buy me one!” Shu tries to protest, but it falls in vain as Luca shoves the stick with the caramelized apple on his hand.
“But I want to,” is his only reply and really, how can Shu ever refuse? Luca is grinning at him, triumphant.
Sighing, Shu says, “well now I have to repay you.” He takes a bite of the apple. “Do you want takoyaki? Or perhaps a kakigori?”
Luca's eyes widen. And if Shu is being honest, he can imagine a fluffy tail wagging behind Luca at the mention of food.
They end up with a kakigori with blueberry syrup (and a conspicuous wink from Millie as she hands the cup over to Shu). Finding a fairly secluded area facing the harbor so they can eat their food, Shu spreads his coat on the ground so they can sit on it. The dark of the sea illuminates light from the lanterns decorating the stretch of the port. The noise from the festival is muted by the distance, and all Shu can hear is the sound of the waves crashing against the seawall.
And somewhere he guesses he hears Doppio's voice threatening to blow Ver up with fireworks.
“Hey, Shu,” Luca says, breaking the silence between them. “Do you know when the fireworks will start?”
Shu checks his phone for the time. “Five minutes from now, I think,” he replies. “Do you want me to call Ren and Sonny so we can watch the fireworks together?” His fingers move on autopilot, tapping on his contacts and is about to dial Sonny's number when he hears Luca whisper “no.”
“Luca?” Shu looks up at him.
And guffaws at the sight that welcomes him.
“Luca, your mouth is so blue holy cow!” Shu says, breathing a lungful from laughing too hard.
Luca pouts, covering his mouth in embarrassment. “Noooooo, don't look!” He says petulantly.
“I'm sorry. I'm sorry.” Shu breathes in deeply. “Anyway, you don't want to find Sonny and Ren?”
“I-I mean it's okay if you want to.”
“But?” He raises an eyebrow.
“But.” Luca sighs. “I want to watch the fireworks. With you. With just the two of us.”
“Oh.”
A myriad of colors paints Luca's face – from the yellow lights of the lantern enveloping him, to the blue of the syrup staining his lips, then to the pink of his flush coloring his cheeks, his lavender eyes darting away from Shu's in embarrassment.
He smiles in fond amusement.
He can really never say no to Luca.
Shu scoots closer until their shoulders are touching. He feels Luca stiffen momentarily before relaxing.
The first boom of the fireworks has them both looking up at the night sky. Shu can hear the distant oohs and aahs from the crowd as they all pause and stare. Hurriedly, he turns his phone on and taps on the camera app, finding the perfect angle to capture the dark sea and the colorful sky.
And if Shu manages to catch his and Luca's shadows sitting closely together, with his head resting on Luca's shoulder, well.
He takes another picture of their silhouettes before pocketing his phone and redirects his gaze to the fireworks above.
﹏ ☼ ﹏
This isn't the first time Shu has swung by the field to watch Luca train. On numerous occasions, in fact, even if it isn't summer break, Luca would call Shu at 5 am on a Saturday and pull him to jog.
Oftentimes, it would end with Shu sitting on the bleachers, watching while Luca runs around the oval in inhumane speed.
This time is no different. With the competitions nearing, Luca has been busy practicing, be it with his team or alone running laps. In the afternoons, he would sometimes swing by Shu's cram school, meeting up with him after Shu's class and after Luca's training to go to the arcades or to have celebratory ramen after a job well done. They would stay out until the cicadas stop buzzing and the moon has long risen above the night sky.
Lately, however, Shu has been alone on his walk home. He has to admit that he's become so used to Luca's presence beside him that he can't help but to miss his friend. Boyfriend?
What are they, really? Shu wonders as he watches Luca wipe the sweat off his forehead with his shirt while his coach says something to him. They have moved past being friends, for one. His feet have wandered on their own accord, walking towards the field instead of going straight home because Shu's heart decided it felt empty after not seeing Luca for days.
He has not seen some of his friends since summer break started, a far longer duration than the last time Luca has smiled on him. And although Shu indeed misses them, it's just not the same.
But then again, they have yet to put a label on whatever they have.
They haven't even held hands????
But Luca kissed his forehead.
And his finger.
Heck, his homescreen on his phone is the picture he took of them at last week's summer festival.
That has to mean something, right?
When practice ends, Luca jogs immediately to where Shu is, a grin plastered on his face and an arm outstretched in front of him.
“Let's go home?”
Shu looks at the offered hand, then to Luca's face, open and expectant.
So he places his palm on his and lets himself be pulled up. And as they exit the field, Shu feels a slight squeeze on their joined hands.
﹏ ☼ ﹏
“So,” Mysta starts as the end credits of the movie they're watching on Shu's laptop start to roll. “What's with you and Luca?” Before Shu can even open his mouth, Mysta quickly adds, “I know you have a crush on him. And yes, Ike told me about that. How dare you not tell your own brother about your feelings, by the way. You're always with him every day, even more than how you already are during school days.”
Well.
Mysta may like to goof around most times, but his perceptive nature is something Shu admires about his brother.
Sometimes it terrifies him.
“We're… something,” Shu answers because that is the truth, isn't it?
“Something?”
He nods.
“So…” Mysta raises an eyebrow. “Are you friends with benefits–”
“Mysta!”
His brother raises his hands in defense. “You're not calling him your boyfriend, so what else am I supposed to think what that something is?”
“Anything but that, at least?!”
“A summer fling, then?”
“No…?” He answers, unsure.
“No?”
“I don't know.” Shu grunts, exasperated. He grabs a pillow and places it on his lap, fiddling with the corner of the pillow case. “We never really talked about it.”
Hearing him verbalize his thoughts, to his brother no less, worsens the pang he's been feeling on his chest ever since this whole thing started. Normally, Shu has the answers. He provides the solutions if someone asks for his help.
And it's why he is frustrated. He likes Luca. He likes him a lot. And it's clear that the feeling is reciprocated.
So what is he unsure of?
“I want this to last for longer than summer,” Shu mutters.
Beside him, Mysta hums. “Then don't let it end when summer does,” he says, matter of factly.
Like it's the most obvious solution.
﹏ ☼ ﹏
Shu can tell.
Beneath those smiles and the reassurances of “don't worry about me, coach” and “I'm fine, Shu. Really, I am”, Luca is upset. The warmth that Shu is accustomed to is not present in those lavender eyes.
As they sit on the grassy fields while watching Luca's team, all Shu can do is to reach for Luca's hand and intertwine their fingers, hoping to provide him a bit of comfort.
And if Luca turns to bury his head on the crook of Shu's shoulder, and if Shu feels his sleeve get wetter, well…
He squeezes his hand a little bit more tightly, hoping it's enough.
Maybe not.
But it's worth the try.
I'm here, he thinks.
He hopes it's enough.
-
It's been two weeks since the competition has ended. Two weeks since Luca has sprained his ankle, making him unable to participate in a match that he's trained for months. Shu can still see the bitterness and regret in his eyes every time he visits him. Sometimes, Mysta, Vox, and Ike would tag along, making sure that Luca is well entertained while cooped up in his bedroom with mountains of pillow elevating his swollen foot.
“You need to get well soon if you want to kick my ass, boy!” Vox says playfully, mashing buttons on his controller and delivering the final blow to Luca's character in Street Fighter.
“No fair! I want a rematch!” Luca huffs.
Slowly but surely, he starts to laugh that hearty laugh emanating deep in his chest. The laugh that grates on Vox's nerves but sends a rush of serotonin on Shu's.
One day at a time.
When the pain and the swelling has gone down, Luca surprises Shu by limping his way towards his house.
“You could have just called me if you want to hang out.” Shu clicks his tongue, all the while placing the throw pillows on the coffee table for Luca to prop his foot on. “I can just go to your house.”
“I would rather die than see the mold on my bedroom ceiling for one more second,” Luca says as he settles on the couch, leaning his head on the backrest as he smiles at Shu. “And besides, I haven't seen you in a long time.”
He's wrong.
They saw each other two days ago.
“Stop being so dramatic,” Shu whispers, biting his cheek to stop himself from smiling.
He can't, however, stop his heart from hammering against his chest, only beating faster when he turns around and sees Luca's gaze on him in what Shu can only describe as fond.
“But I really did miss you.” Luca chuckles. “And I still haven't thanked you for…y'know? For being there for me.”
“I will always be here for you, Luca. You know that right?”
“Forever? Even after this summer ends?”
In that moment, fear flashes in those lavender eyes. The more Shu holds his gaze, the more the warmth in that smile wanes.
Throughout the summer, Shu has always wondered what they are and how long this… whatever this is will last. And so he has resorted into taking everything that he can, stealing every moment before the season ends because he doesn't know.
And in his trepidation, he has never once asked Luca.
In his naivety, he just learned to live in the present, afraid of what the future might bring.
But at this very moment, he realizes.
Luca wants this just as much as Shu does.
What is there to fear, anyway?
﹏ ☼ ﹏
The school bell rings, signaling the end of classes. Shu's classmates mill around, waving goodbye and inviting one another to go to the arcades. Just as he is placing his books inside his bag, he hears Elira shout “hey, Shu! Your boyfriend is here!” followed by the incessant teasings from Uki and Claude.
Word really does travel fast in this small seaside town. Apart from Mysta who caught them cuddling on the couch, no one really knew that they had just become official until last weekend when Millie and Enna saw them at the mall.
Holding hands.
At least now Shu no longer has to hide the fact that he actually enjoys the jokes and the banter of their friends because yes, they are actually true. Yes, they are dating. Yes, Shu's mom approves.
And what of it?
Waving to his friends goodbye, Shu walks up to where Luca is waiting for him outside with a bounce on his step, ignoring the hollers as Shu wraps an arm around Luca's waist while Luca presses a kiss on his temple.
Maybe one day, these public displays will die down. Maybe the kisses will stop giving Shu butterflies in his stomach because he has gotten used to the feeling of those lips.
And maybe the good thing about wanting to savor the present and not mind the future is that he doesn't care right now if the feelings would one day stop.
(Hopefully not.)
They're together now. Shu has his arm around him now as they walk out of the school premises and into the familiar cobbled path towards the beach. On their way, Luca tells him about the latest episode of the anime he's watching and how it is “yet another high school anime where the main character is OP”. Shu is sure Luca will continue watching it nevertheless.
When they can finally hear the sound of the waves crashing on the shore and when the stoned path gives way to sand, they remove their shoes and socks, letting their bare feet be tickled by the sand as they walk closer to the shore.
Having lived in this town for as long as he can remember, Shu should have been bored of the view of the ocean. There would be some days when he would long to leave, perhaps carve a name for himself in the city. This thought would sometimes intensify while studying for college entrance exams.
Some days, however, he finds content in just losing his senses to the sound of the waves and the seagulls cawing overhead, to the feel of the salty air frizzing up his hair. Some days, it would be filled with laughter from his friends as the fire crackles at night.
It's where this started, anyway.
“Do you think I'll be able to compete this winter?” Luca muses.
“I don't doubt that,” he says, truthfully.
“What if I sprain my foot again and lose my chance to run and maybe get scouted, Shu?”
“Then we find another way to get you to reach your dreams.”
Who knows what will happen in three months? In two? Heck, who even knows what tomorrow will bring?
But Shu will be there.
“One day when I win a gold medal at the Olympics, I will tell the reporters about the boy who let me hug him while I was drenched in sweat because I lost the summer meet in 2016,” Luca says. “And how the same boy let me hug him again after I won.”
The next Olympics is four years from now.
Shu smiles, hopeful.
He likes that.
As the sun prepares its descent, he turns to Luca and is welcomed by the sight of him bathed in golden light.
“Will you not tell the press that that boy kissed you in the summer?”
“Well.” Luca chuckles. “How will I tell them something that hasn't happened?”
“I think I can change that.”
Shu stands on his toes, putting his hands on Luca's shoulders for balance. Closing his eyes, he presses his lips against chapped ones, feather-light and barely there.
It's not explosive like what he imagines a first kiss should be. It's not loud like the fireworks in the dark summer sky. It doesn't drown like the deep blue of the sea.
It is calm. It bundles Shu up like the soft foam of the waves as it crashes gently on the shore, tickling their bare feet.
It feels right.
“Will you be there to kiss me again when I win?”
Shu sighs against his lips. “I'd like that,” he says before closing the distance once more. This time, Luca presses back, his arms snaking around Shu's waist to pull him closer. “As long as you'll have me.”
“Always.”
Beyond the shoreline, the sun begins to set.