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He Xuan owed Hua Cheng a lot—both metaphorically and (unfortunately) literally. More than he could likely ever repay. Yet even after all Hua Cheng had done for him, He Xuan couldn’t help but resent him because…how was it that Hua Cheng was so fucking happy?

It wasn’t fair!

He Xuan had finally gotten his revenge after centuries of plotting and scheming, of pretending and searching and planning. That fucker Shi Wudu was dead—albeit not quite according to plan, and that was still a bit vexing, but getting to rip his fucking head off was probably the next best way for him to go.

And that twit Shi Qingxuan was stripped of his godhood, cut off from spiritual power, and living as a mortal in pain and squalor.

So why didn’t it feel good?

Hua Cheng had finally gotten what he wanted and was happy. So why, when He Xuan got what he wanted, was he still so fucking miserable?

Now that he wasn’t spending every moment plotting revenge, He Xuan had an absurd amount of spare time on his hands. He’d pretty much abandoned his manor, which was no big loss, really. He still checked on his aquatic pets now and then but with as much time as he spent infiltrating the heavens and sticking to Shi Qingxuan, it wasn’t like the place had ever felt like a home. The problem was, He Xuan couldn’t imagine anything feeling like a home ever again—his home had been ripped away from him centuries ago and he’d never forgiven or forgotten it.

But all the revenge in the world couldn’t bring his warm home and loving family back.

So with nothing better to do, He Xuan blamed hundreds of years of habit for why he’d occasionally stroll around the capital, entirely coincidentally in the area where he knew Shi Qingxuan hung out.

Yet again he found himself there, insisting that seeing Shi Qingxuan so miserable and pathetic would of course make him feel much better.

At least that was the tentative plan, but unfortunately Shi Qingxuan didn’t look miserable or pathetic at all. Yeah, sure, he was scruffy and pretty filthy, standing with his weight on his good leg and his one arm hanging limply at his side. But he was smiling so brightly, clutching a fluffy blanket to his chest yet trying to gesture at the same time and therefore nearly dropping it, effusively babbling at…

He Xuan felt a chill and glanced around.

If Shi Qingxuan was gabbing at Xie Lian, then didn’t that mean a certain Crimson Rain Sought Flower had to be lurking somewhere around here too?

“It’s so warm and soft! Thank you so much, Your High—er, Ol’ Xie!” Shi Qingxuan was saying.

“Why are you thanking me?” Xie Lian asked with a bemused smile. “I’m not the one who left it for you—”

“Right, right,” Shi Qingxuan interrupted with a grin. “You have no idea how it got here, I get it. It just drifted in and tucked itself around me all on its own, mm hmm.” He gave an exaggerated wink.

Then he went to clap Xie Lian on the shoulder and nearly dropped the blanket in the dirt; it was only thanks to Xie Lian’s impressive reflexes that the blanket was saved from the dust. Though to be honest, it wasn’t destined to stay clean for long regardless; Shi Qingxuan was pretty grubby and making the blanket dirtier by the moment just from holding it.

“Thanks, Ol’ Xie!” Shi Qingxuan said. “Good job rescuing that blanket you totally didn’t leave for me a few nights ago.”

“I keep telling you…” Xie Lian gave up and just shook his head.

Watching the exchange safely out of sight, He Xuan sighed quietly to himself.

“Why didn’t that dummy just cut off his brother’s head so I wouldn’t have to watch him live like this?” he muttered under his breath.

“Why do you have to watch him at all, exactly?” Hua Cheng asked, somehow right behind He Xuan’s shoulder, startling the shit out of him.

He Xuan hissed in fright then glared at Hua Cheng and muttered, “I should’ve known that if Xie Li—”

“Who?” Hua Cheng interrupted icily, murder flashing in his eyes.

“Ahem, His Highness was here, you’d be here too.”

“Gege likes to check in on him now and then,” Hua Cheng said idly. His eyes slid from where Xie Lian was chatting with Shi Qingxuan to He Xuan, who was staring intently at the former Wind Master. “Apparently gege isn’t the only one.”

Distracted as he was, it took He Xuan too long to catch what Hua Cheng had said.

“It’s not like that,” he argued weakly. “I was just passing through…”

“Passing through the place you know he lives,” Hua Cheng said. “What a believable coincidence.”

He Xuan glared again but didn’t bother rebutting.

“If you miss him so much, change skins and befriend him again,” Hua Cheng said, sounding bored of the whole thing.

“And betray him twice?” He Xuan fired back, then hurried to correct, “…And I don’t miss him! Not at all.”

Hua Cheng just shrugged. “So what if you betray him twice? Isn’t it your revenge? His brother took the easy way out and now the fallen Wind Master is the only one left on which you can vent your hatred.” There was the briefest pause, then Hua Cheng asked, his voice like the whisper of the devil, “You do hate him, don’t you?”

He Xuan huffed. “He’s too pathetic to hate.”

“Then you make a great pair,” Hua Cheng murmured sardonically, vanishing a second later.

After spending days that turned into weeks watching Shi Qingxuan do a whole lot of nothing yet smiling and chattering all the while, He Xuan started to think maybe Hua Cheng’s plan wasn’t half bad.

Not that he’d go to the extremely laborious effort of actually befriending him again or anything like that—no way. But maybe if He Xuan superficially joined the little cluster of beggars Shi Qingxuan was a part of, he’d get close enough to see Shi Qingxuan in his weakest, most miserable moments—because even if He Xuan hadn’t caught them yet, Shi Qingxuan had to have them…

And then He Xuan would be reasonably satisfied and could move on and never think about Shi Qingxuan again.

He Xuan didn’t really want to get that close again but he supposed it couldn’t be helped. Besides, he’d spent centuries slowly spinning his web, elaborately laying his trap…what was another few days making sure everything was all wrapped up?

Even if he only planned on being undercover for a short while, he still needed to put some thought into what skin he’d use. He needed something nonthreatening, something easily welcomed in an environment like this. And something that Shi Qingxuan wouldn’t recognize—so anything similar to Ming Yi or He Xuan himself was out.

A child might not be a bad idea…Shi Qingxuan and everyone else would likely have their guard down around a kid. But He Xuan still wanted to be able to plausibly defend himself if the situation arose and he didn’t know that he could act naive enough to pass as a child—even a street-smart, mature-for-his-age one.

And perhaps more importantly, He Xuan didn’t think he could stomach Shi Qingxuan talking down to him all childishly.

So maybe not a child but perhaps someone just a bit younger than Shi Qingxuan? The type of person that others like to look after and help out?

He Xuan couldn’t help but feel like he was copying Hua Cheng a little but oh well—there was a reason Hua Cheng had picked his “San Lang” skin to get close to Xie Lian: because it worked.

And just like that, He Xuan became a somber youth somewhere around seventeen.

Now he just needed to think of how to go about joining Shi Qingxuan’s group. What would be a good excuse, something to pull at heartstrings and make him suitably downtrodden and just the right amount of pathetic? A clean, able-bodied guy his age would be too suspicious otherwise.

It wasn’t like he could just walk right up and ask to be friends—okay, actually, with Shi Qingxuan that would probably totally work. But hopefully the rest of the beggars wouldn’t be quite so brainless as to just accept some random mysterious person into their company so easily.

It would probably be best to look a bit unfortunate and roughed-up; a young man down on his luck, broke and knocked around. He Xuan very briefly thought about asking Hua Cheng—since this was an act they’d put on convincingly before, when Shi Qingxuan and Xie Lian came to rescue the “Earth Master” from Paradise Manor’s dungeon—but he dismissed it a second later.

First, he didn’t really want Hua Cheng to know about all this; and second, Hua Cheng had been a little too thorough and convincing when giving “Earth Master” his injuries. He Xuan wasn’t out to fool the heavens this time, just a few grubby mortals so he didn’t need authentic bruises or genuinely broken ribs.

“Ah? What’s this pretty thing?” a sleazy voice leered as He Xuan was pondering.

He Xuan barely resisted a smile at the rough men starting to surround him.

Perfect.

A handful of men with nasty looks on their faces swarmed him.

He Xuan didn’t know if these guys had mugging, trafficking, or even actual rape in mind (or all of the above) but it didn’t really matter. They were up to no good so he didn’t have to feel bad about hurting them; for now he’d put up just enough of a fight. Of course he’d kill the fuckers later but at the moment that would cause too much of a scene.

Still, it took a considerable amount of restraint as he fought back, trying to let them get a few hits in. Just a little bit more so he’d be convincingly battered and bruised and then he’d make his escape—

No sooner had He Xuan thought that than one of his attackers slumped to the ground, blood seeping from his head where he’d been smacked soundly by a board.

“You nasties! Get away from him!” his “savior” yelled, taking another swing with his board. A weak hand grabbed He Xuan’s wrist and gave a tug. “Come, little brother—run!”

He Xuan couldn’t believe his ridiculous luck—he’d just been “saved” by Shi Qingxuan.

Taken back amongst the understandably-cautious beggars (except for Shi Qingxuan, who apparently even after a couple years as a mortal in this environment still had no self-preservation instinct) He Xuan spun a story not actually too far from the truth. With a quivering voice, looking for all the world like a youth on the verge of tears but trying to stay strong, he gave them a tale about losing his whole family—father, mother, and sweet, sweet little sister—their whole house burning down. With nowhere else to go he came to the capital to seek work, robbed on the road and rejected at every turn once he’d arrived, his luck only taking a turn for the worse as he was nearly captured by ruffians.

Shi Qingxuan nodded along as if he’d known this young man for years and could vouch for him.

“He was about to get picked up and sold when I found him!” Shi Qingxuan chimed in, chest puffed out a bit, expecting to be praised for his heroics.

Instead one of the other beggars just rolled his eyes and grumbled, “Oh great. Just what we need: another fine little tender-skinned pretty boy who was obviously raised in sweetness.”

“Excuse me..?” He Xuan said hesitantly. Had he misjudged his disguise? Maybe he’d been a little lazy in just choosing something close to his younger self but that definitely shouldn’t look anything like a fine little tender-skinned pretty boy—

Shi Qingxuan blatantly ignored the man’s comment, instead clapping his good hand on He Xuan’s shoulder. “Don’t you worry—you’re with friends now. We’ll take care of you til you get back on your feet.”

“Speak for yourself!” someone scoffed. “Who’s we, huh?”

“You stingy old scoundrel!” Shi Qingxuan chided, a cute pout out of place on his filthy face. “Fine! I’ll take care of you til you get back on your feet.” He puffed up proudly again and gave He Xuan a bright smile. “How’s that?”

He Xuan had started this ridiculous farce to see Shi Qingxuan depressed and miserable yet here he was, beaming at him with that clear, radiant smile same as ever.

He Xuan was long dead and didn’t have a heart anymore but his chest tightened all the same; probably from disappointment.

It was never He Xuan’s intention to get all that close. His plan was to lurk on the periphery and observe from there—something he did quite well.

Usually.

“What are you doing over here all by yourself?” Shi Qingxuan scolded, half-dragging He Xuan from his place in the shadows. “I told you to come sit with me!”

He Xuan nearly tripped over his own feet. How many times had he heard that same thing at heavenly banquets?

(Thankfully) oblivious to He Xuan’s stumbling, Shi Qingxuan sat down, pulling He Xuan with him, and broke off a piece of flatbread—at least He Xuan was pretty sure it was flatbread, or had been at some point—and offered it to He Xuan.

He Xuan just glanced away, shaking his head. “I’m not hungry,” he mumbled.

“Ah…” Shi Qingxuan sighed knowingly, a pained smile on his face. “Everyone’s like that at first,” he assured He Xuan. “A bit squeamish. But hunger is the best spice, y’know? After a while, a little dirt or mold won’t bother you a bit.”

I know, He Xuan thought. Trust me, I’ve eaten—tried to eat—things you can’t even imagine.

I know.

“Just take it,” Shi Qingxuan coaxed, pressing the hard piece of bread into He Xuan’s hand before he could pull away. “That way when you get hungry, you’ll have it.”

“I don’t want it!” He Xuan tried giving it back. “You really don’t have to take care of me—”

“So stubborn!” Shi Qingxuan laughed, folding his hand around He Xuan’s fist to keep it closed. “I said keep it!”

“Aren’t you hungry?” He Xuan snapped, yanking his hand out of Shi Qingxuan’s much warmer one. “Don’t starve yourself to give it to me! How stupid are you?!”

“Stupid—!” Shi Qingxuan sputtered indignantly.

One of the beggars laughed at Shi Qingxuan’s stammering. “Ol’ Feng was a god, y’know,” he informed He Xuan.

“A god?” He Xuan echoed, sounding appropriately skeptical. “This idio—this guy?”

“Why do you look like you don’t believe it?” Shi Qingxuan wailed.

He Xuan glanced down at the piece of bread in his palm. “That must be why you don’t care about giving things away. You’re too used to having everything you could ever need,” he mumbled.

“Yes, it is easy to be generous when you have a lot,” Shi Qingxuan admitted. “But that’s just who I am and I will still be generous even when I only have a little.” He nudged his shoulder against He Xuan’s and flashed a little smile. “So keep it, hmm?”

Probably trying to ascend again, He Xuan thought bitterly.

Surprisingly enough, one of the beggars said aloud exactly what He Xuan had been thinking:

“Trying to be all kind and noble to us beggar folk; you just trying to ascend again?”

“No way!” Shi Qingxuan insisted good-naturedly. Then his smile fell to something a little sad and he added softly, “I never belonged there in the first place.”

Only He Xuan understood the double meaning in his words.

The other beggars soon grew bored of Shi Qingxuan’s antics with the newcomer and drifted away to do their own things. He Xuan expected—wanted—Shi Qingxuan to do the same but instead he just sat right next to him, nibbling his rock hard little piece of flatbread and babbling on. He Xuan only half-listened; while he didn’t care about people’s names and homeless hierarchy and all that crap, he’d been a spy for too long to just ignore the information entirely.

Yes, it was definitely for professional reasons and not because he was so used to Shi Qingxuan’s rambling that he found it kind of relaxing. No way.

He Xuan resisted the urge to sigh as he snuck a glance at the fallen Wind Master, chattering away.

How is this guy is still so annoying..?

“Are you really a god?” He Xuan asked quietly.

“I was,” Shi Qingxuan answered.

He Xuan pretended to think about that for a moment. “So why don’t you mooch off your powerful friends and let them take care of you?” he asked, just barely keeping the derision from his voice.

Your brother told you to find Pei Ming and have him take care of you. Why didn’t you? Too vain and ashamed?

Shi Qingxuan didn’t seem pained by the question. “Well, even if I wanted that, gods really aren’t suppose to interfere too directly in the lives of mortals—”

He Xuan barely repressed a sneer. Your brother didn’t care about such inconvenient rules.

“They ‘aren’t supposed to’ or they ‘can’t’?” He Xuan pressed cruelly.

“They…” Shi Qingxuan trailed off, then swallowed thickly before regrouping. “They shouldn’t,” he said firmly. Then he gave a nonchalant shrug. “And besides, this is the fate I was meant to have. So I’m just righting the scales.”

Fury bubbled up in He Xuan’s gut.

No, this wasn’t the fate you were meant to have! This wasn’t the fate either of us were meant to have! Sure, you weren’t meant to be a god but you also weren’t meant to be this! If your damn brother had just—

Had just—

But Shi Wudu hadn’t just left it all alone.

So now all they had was this.

“Anyway, you don’t need to worry about me, friend,” Shi Qingxuan said after a moment, trying to lighten things back up and giving He Xuan a little pat on the shoulder.

“‘Friend?’” He Xuan rankled.

Shi Qingxuan laughed. “What’s wrong with that? I don’t know your name, and around here it’s not polite to ask first. So what else can I call you but ‘friend’?”

“Xuan,” He Xuan said, immediately feeling like the world’s biggest idiot the second it left his mouth.

You lived undercover for centuries, you’ve spied on the heavens, no one even knew what Black Water Demon Xuan looked like and now the best alias you can come up with is your own damn name?!

“Xuan…” Shi Qingxuan repeated thoughtfully.

If He Xuan still had a heartbeat it would have stopped.

Does he know? He has to. Even he isn’t dumb enough to overlook this—

Shi Qingxuan grinned. “What a great name! A-Xuan!”

He Xuan’s jaw dropped incredulously.

Fortunately, Shi Qingxuan didn’t notice, intently mumbling to himself about something before perking up, eyes glittering excitedly. “Ooh, I know! You can all me ‘ge’!”

He Xuan choked and nearly died on the spot.

“I know what you’re thinking—I look so young, after all, can I really be older than you?” Shi Qingxuan pressed a hand to his own face, posing as if he was some delicate young maiden and not a scruffy beggar covered in filth.

That’s not what I’m thinking at all, you delusional, self-centered twit!

Shi Qingxuan, of course, was oblivious because being oblivious was what he did best. “I know I don’t look a day over sixteen but, well…” He leaned in too close to whisper conspiratorially, “I am just a smidge older than that.”

He Xuan opened his mouth but he genuinely couldn’t think of anything to say. And if he gave in to temptation and just smacked Shi Qingxuan upside the head that would definitely blow his cover—

“So this is great! I’ve always wanted a little brother! Try it out, A-Xuan! Please? For your gege?” Shi Qingxuan wheedled, tugging on He Xuan’s arm. “Pleeeease? I bet it’ll sound so cute! I want to hear it! Pretty please? ‘Gege’? ‘Ge’? ‘Feng-ge’?”

Clenching his jaw so tightly his molars creaked, He Xuan just stared back flatly in response.

He Xuan really should’ve thought this through a little better; he might have to kill off this character and try again as someone else.

He Xuan did not kill off “A-Xuan” and try again as someone else. Instead he assured himself that he wouldn’t be here for that long, it didn’t matter, he just had to hang out for a few days and witness Shi Qingxuan’s oh-so-satisfying misery and depression and then he could drift off never to be seen again.

“A few days” somehow turned into a few weeks.

A person might wonder if living as a beggar just to spy on Shi Qingxuan was worth it but He Xuan had lived through hell (and died through hell, as it were) and spent centuries next to Shi Qingxuan, pretending to be someone he wasn’t. So even though this was a life of poverty, well…

Compared to what else He Xuan had been through, it really wasn’t all that bad.

He knew that while he couldn’t forget his goal, sinking into the role would make his acting all the more convincing. It was easy enough to go along with the little day-to-day things: begging, filthy odd jobs, scrounging for scraps and splitting the spoils with those too young or infirm.

And Shi Qingxuan was never far away, chattering all the while.

“Does he ever shut up,” He Xuan muttered, already knowing the answer.

Still, one of the beggars next to him burst out laughing.

“Nope! Not Ol’ Feng!”

“Might as well get used to it,” another said.

“Though at least his constant chirping is better than his mad rambling when he first showed up,” yet another chimed in.

“Oh?” He Xuan said, trying not to sound too interested.

“But it turned out he was actually a god, though,” one pointed out. “So his rambling wasn’t that mad after all, was it?”

“Why past tense?” He Xuan asked, curious as to how much these beggars knew. Shi Qingxuan couldn’t keep a secret to save his life so babbling out his life story to these people didn’t seem too unlikely. “What happened, exactly? Why ‘was’ a god and not still ‘is’ a god?”

The beggars looked at each other, waiting for someone else to speak. Finally, one said with a shrug, “Said it happened by accident.”

“What?” He Xuan asked sharply. 

“Said he ascended by accident,” the guy somewhat clarified. “Didn’t know that was possible, but Ol’ Feng says even gods make mistakes.”

“Alright,” He Xuan nearly gritted out. “But even if he ascended by…by ‘accident’ then how did he get here?”

“Once he figured out the mistake, he wanted to fix it. So down he came, I guess,” the designated speaker said, as if gods just un-ascended all the time.

He Xuan couldn’t help but think this was an awfully liberal interpretation of events.

“And you believe this..?” He Xuan questioned.

“Sure,” the beggar said with a nod, the others nodding along with him. “You know Ol’ Feng—he may be a bit goofy, but he’d never feel right taking something that wasn’t his. I reckon he felt awful about it and tried to make things right as soon as he found out.”

The other beggars hummed in agreement until one chimed in with, “Not me! Finders keepers, I wouldn’t’ve given it back for nothing!”

Everyone erupted into laughter.

Everyone but He Xuan.

There was at least a tiny profit to be made from Shi Qingxuan’s apparent allergy to silence and that came in the form of storytelling.

Admittedly, his audience was mostly children—and beggar children at that, who had no money to spare for his bowl—but every now and then an adult would stop by and listen for a minute and throw something in, or a young lord or miss would be out and about and could at least toss in a piece of candy as payment for a tale. He Xuan also noticed a few regulars that appeared to be servants from more affluent households pause during their errands when they could to take in a story or two.

And yes, He Xuan was also there because for some reason, Shi Qingxuan coincidentally always decided to go tell stories on days that He Xuan didn’t have any day jobs and insisted on dragging him along.

Which was why, from the get-go, He Xuan couldn’t help but notice many of Shi Qingxuan’s stories sounded awfully familiar, though with an occasional little twist.

“And with the next roll of the dice, the princess fell into a jungle—” Shi Qingxuan was saying, voice ominous and dramatic, in full storyteller mode.

“More monsters?” a kid interrupted.

“Snakes?” another suggested.

“Poisonous frogs?” yet another guessed.

“Worse!” Shi Qingxuan said. “A horde of savages—cannibals! They all looked at our heroic princess like she was the most delicious delicacy—because of course she would be—and the princess warned them away but they kept chasing and chasing until one dared throw a spear and—”

Shi Qingxuan paused to inhale, hand to his chest as if the scene was just too gory and he couldn’t bear to continue.

The kids didn’t dare to breathe, eyes wide.

“…They killed her?” one asked in a whisper.

“Did they eat her?”

“What kind of story is this? They really killed her and ate her up?!”

“Worse,” Shi Qingxuan choked out dramatically, fingertips brushing his own cheek. “That spear grazed her beautiful face.”

The children and He Xuan all wore the exact same nonplussed expression.

“The princess had tried to be nice and just run away rather than fighting them with her magic but that was more than she could bear! So with a whoosh! And a whoosh!” Shi Qingxuan gestured with his good arm and they could all practically see the fan in his hand. “She sent them flying!”

It wasn’t the first time He Xuan wondered if Shi Qingxuan had more fun telling the stories than the children had listening to them.

“Finally the princess rolled the right number and dropped into a creepy cold hallway and she walked down down down these stairs—”

“Was she scared?”

“She would’ve had every right to be,” Shi Qingxuan said solemnly. “But she knew someone was waiting for her to save them so she couldn’t be scared, she had to keep going. And then finally, after a thousand steps—”

“Really? A thousand? Did she count?”

Shi Qingxuan pretended like he hadn’t heard the question and barreled ahead: “—she heard quiet breathing and a single whispered word and she knew that was the prince! There he was, chained to the wall in this nasty old dungeon, looking disheveled but still kind of handsome, I suppose—”

“What’s disheveled mean?”

“Ah, you know…his hair was kind of undone a bit from being tossed around, his clothes were kinda rumply—” Shi Qingxuan tried to explain.

“So he just got out of bed?”

“No! He had some bruises and things, he’d been a prisoner! It wasn’t like he just rolled out of bed!” Shi Qingxuan argued.

“Well you said he was still handsome!” the kid argued right back.

“Well, yes, handsome is handsome, even if you’ve been knocked around a little—you’re focusing on the wrong part!” Shi Qingxuan wailed, trying to get them back on track. “He’s a prisoner, his hands are locked up, okay? And he says, tears in his eyes with relief, ‘Oh! It’s you! My best friend!’”

That is not how it went, He Xuan thought to himself.

“That’s not how it goes!” one of the kids piped up, startling He Xuan and Shi Qingxuan both; He Xuan because he was afraid he’d slipped and spoken aloud and Shi Qingxuan because he was totally busted.

“No, I’m pretty sure it is—” Shi Qingxuan insisted weakly.

“Best friend?” the kid asked skeptically. “She’s a princess, he’s a prince. Isn’t he her boyfriend?”

“W-what?” Shi Qingxuan stammered while He Xuan choked. “No! No, why would you even..!”

“No!” He Xuan said a little too adamantly at the same time.

“What are you all upset for?” one of the kids asked He Xuan critically.

“I’m…I’m offended on the prince’s behalf!” He Xuan scrambled for an excuse. “That you’d think he would have such a vain, flighty twit as a girlfriend!”

“A-Xuan!” Shi Qingxuan gasped, hurt. “I’m not—I mean, the princess isn’t vain just because she knows she’s beautiful! Who doesn’t want to be pretty!”

“He’s not bothering to argue the flighty twit part,” another kid commented.

“She’s not a flighty twit either! She came all this way to save her best friend who was so beaten and injured he couldn’t even walk—”

“So how’d she get him out?”

“She carried him on her back!” Shi Qingxuan answered easily.

Now the kids were really skeptical. “A princess carried a grown man on her back? What is she, a bear?!”

“A bear!” Shi Qingxuan shrieked, mortally offended.

“A big, burly bear!” the kids yelled, erupting into giggles.

The more scandalized Shi Qingxuan became, the more hilarious the kids found it until even He Xuan couldn’t help but snort and fight a smile.

“Even you?!” Shi Qingxuan lamented, somehow hearing that wry snort under all the laughter. “I feel so betrayed! A-Xuan, you’re supposed to be on my side!”

“I never said I was on your side,” He Xuan said automatically, the corner of his lips still curled up just a smidge. “Hey, you really thought—nevermind.”

“What?” Shi Qingxuan asked.

You really thought ‘the prince’ looked handsome?

“Nothing,” He Xuan muttered, barely resisting the urge to punch himself in the head.

Anyway, it turned out—not that He Xuan was particularly surprised—that Shi Qingxuan had a lot of stories.

“And the immortal fairy was in some big trouble this time!” Shi Qingxuan was saying, today’s story in full swing.

“If she’s immortal can she really be in that much trouble?” one of the kids asked pointedly.

He Xuan didn’t know if it was due to Shi Qingxuan’s complete lack of social status or if it was just his goofy personality that made the kids feel comfortable enough to interrupt and tease, but the back-and-forth was part of the show at this point.

“Just because she’s immortal and beautiful doesn’t mean she was a match for the Wicked Evil Death God!” Shi Qingxuan countered. “Not at her current power, anyway. She was missing her supreme spiritual device—”

“Why?”

“Why what?” Shi Qingxuan asked, perhaps a little too used to these interruptions.

“Why was she missing it? If it’s her supreme spiritual device, shouldn’t she take better care of it? Don’t tell me she just forgot it at home.”

“Or she lost it out shopping.”

“Or she traded it for some candy.”

“No!” Shi Qingxuan said, indignant. And normally He Xuan would’ve found this a bit funny except he knew what really happened to that ‘supreme spiritual device’ and that…wasn’t funny at all. “It…it broke, okay?!”

“How do you break a supreme spiritual device?” one of the children asked incredulously.

He Xuan couldn’t really blame them for sounding so skeptical.

“It just got broken, okay!” Shi Qingxuan insisted, obviously not going to explain further. “That’s not the important part anyway—the important part is in the immortal fairy’s moment of dire need, who should show up but the Dark King—”

“Isn’t she fighting the Dark King?”

“No, she’s fighting the Rotten Bad Death Guy—”

“Rotten Bad Breath Guy?”

“Wicked Evil Death God,” one of the better listeners supplied. Then again, with a ridiculous name like that, it was kind of hard to forget. “The Dark King is a different guy.”

Shi Qingxuan just cleared his throat and spoke louder. “And who should show up but the Dark King, who yelled, ‘Beautiful Immortal Fairy! Catch!’ And when she looked at what he’d thrown—” Shi Qingxuan ‘caught’ the Wind Master Fan imaginary supreme spiritual device for effect, “—it was her beloved supreme spiritual device! The Dark King had fixed it!”

“Why?”

“Why what?” Shi Qingxuan asked, finally beginning to lose patience.

“Why would someone with a name like the Dark King fix the immortal fairy’s magic thing?”

Shi Qingxuan grinned a little too smugly. “Because the Dark King was secretly…her best friend!” he crowed. “You didn’t see that one coming, did you?!”

The kids groaned but He Xuan just stared at Shi Qingxuan for a long moment. Several—no, every one of these stories were about the two of them. Sure they were edited quite a bit and Shi Qingxuan had taken a substantial amount of creative license in the retelling, but they were originally about them. Every iteration of the characters were ultimately based on the two of them.

And even if he’d been renamed something so stupid as the Dark King…Shi Qingxuan still happily credited him with fixing the Wind Master fan.

(Even though he was also the one who broke it.)

He Xuan couldn’t help but be just a smidge awed at the zeal with which Shi Qingxuan told these stories about them—featuring some of the most painful times and undoubtedly the most painful person Shi Qingxuan had ever known.

But then He Xuan remembered what seemed ages ago, sitting in Xie Lian’s shoddy shack he called a shrine, and Shi Qingxuan summoning the eerie wind and dimming the room to get the right atmosphere to tell the tale of the Reverend of Empty Words.

Apparently that idiot had never let trauma ruin a good story.

“Why is there always a magical princess or an immortal fairy? Don’t you have any stories about regular people?” one of the kids asked one day

Shi Qingxuan thought for a moment before his face lit up. “Well, there is one story about the two very normal, regular friends who disguised themselves as a married couple to investigate a crime at an inn—”

“Why’d they have to go in as a married couple?” a little boy asked, wrinkling his nose.

(He Xuan had asked the same thing at the time.)

“For fun?” Shi Qingxuan replied guilelessly and He Xuan wondered if the statute of limitations had expired to choke him in retaliation. “Anyway, wouldn’t you know it, they were tailing their target and even though they were being suuuuper quiet and sneaky—”

(They hadn’t been; they’d started bickering as usual.) But more importantly, He Xuan had a horrible feeling as to where this story was going—

“And their target whipped around to catch them, so what else could they do to throw him off but—”

Shi Qingxuan! You swore you would NEVER speak of this again! Do you not know what ‘never’ means?!

“Ugh, don’t tell me they kissed,” one of the boys groaned.

He Xuan’s jaw clenched so hard his molars were about to crack.

“Well…” Shi Qingxuan said, a bit put out at the kids’ reaction. “What else were they supposed to do?”

“Run? Tackle the target? Capture him? Hide?” the boy offered, then scoffed. “Ol’ Feng, you read too many romance novels.”

“I don’t read any romance novels!” Shi Qingxuan protested.

That was patently untrue; not only did Shi Qingxuan read plenty of romance novels, he transformed into a woman to buy them. Which, of course, meant that he had insisted ‘Ming Yi’ transform into a woman too and come along.

Not only was He Xuan coerced into womanhood on romance novel purchasing expeditions, but those same romance novels were likely to blame for a lot of the more ridiculous setups and disguises they found themselves in.

And of course Shi Qingxuan had wailed that if his brother happened to find the books, he’d destroy them so could ‘Ming Yi’ pleeeease keep them in his palace?

He Xuan had never been more grateful that the heavenly capital had burned up and with it the stacks and stacks of sappy romance novels Shi Qingxuan had squirreled away in the Earth Master palace.

One evening the usual crew was sitting around, eating soup that was more water than anything but its saving grace was that it allegedly had a bit of chicken.

He Xuan knew better; this was snake meat, not chicken.

But the beggars continued to talk it up, like if they insisted hard enough then the tough, oily meat in their watery soup would magically turn into the chicken they so wished it to be.

“Ah, you weren’t here yet, but when we saved the world, this pretty daoist rewarded us with chicken!” one of the chattier beggars excitedly told He Xuan.

“It wasn’t a reward; everyone got it whether they helped or not,” Shi Qingxuan gently reminded him.

“Yeah, yeah—but we still saved the world!”

“Took him long enough to deliver on his promise, though; thought he used us and ran.”

“But he did deliver!” Shi Qingxuan spoke up on Xie Lian’s behalf. “He…he just had to wait for his—” There was a slight pause as Shi Qingxuan couldn’t think of what word he wanted to use. “His friend to come back and help him put on the party.”

He Xuan barely kept from arching an eyebrow. Right. His ‘friend.’

One of the beggars snorted. “Right. His friend.”

“You don’t think so?” another beggar asked.

“You didn’t see the daoist and that scary guy in red all handsy and grabby? That’s way more than friendly.”

“Hey!” Shi Qingxuan protested, and for the life of him He Xuan couldn’t figure out why. Shi Qingxuan surely knew about Hua Cheng and Xie Lian’s relationship; why was he getting all defensive about it? “It’s perfectly fine to be handsy and clingy with your friends. I was always grabby with my best friend—”

He Xuan barely stopped himself from letting loose a kick that would break Shi Qingxuan’s good leg.

“Yeah but you’re not normal either!” the beggar interrupted, thankfully cutting Shi Qingxuan off and thereby unknowingly saving him from a second crippled leg.

As everyone had a good natured laugh at Shi Qingxuan’s expense, he gnawed thoughtfully on his bit of chick— snak— er, meat.

“Y’know, Ol’ Xie hasn’t been around since you showed up,” he mused, looking at He Xuan. “I think you’d like him, A-Xuan. And I should probably introduce my friends to each other, right?”

He Xuan’s automatic mental retort of Who’s your friend? was followed up immediately by Oh, shit, no, I do not want to meet Xie—His Highness.

Because of course where there was His Highness, there would be Hua Cheng.

And while He Xuan didn’t know exactly where Xie Lian stood on things, he was good friends with Shi Qingxuan and therefore couldn’t be all that pleased with how that whole…affair had ended. But more importantly: even if Xie Lian was conveniently oblivious to who ‘A-Xuan’ really was, Hua Cheng was not. And Hua Cheng had made it perfectly clear he wanted Black Water absolutely nowhere near his beloved.

This could get ugly. He needed to nip this idea in the bud—

“That settles it! A-Xuan, let’s go on a little visit, hmm? It’ll be nice to get out of the city for a while. It’ll be a fun trip, just you and me!”

So much for nipping it in the bud.

Oh well. He Xuan would figure out some way to talk him out of it later. Nevermind the fact that in their centuries together, Shi Qingxuan was the one talking him into things and He Xuan rarely, if ever, managed to talk Shi Qingxuan out of something. Especially if he insisted it would be “fun.”

Against his better judgment, He Xuan glanced at Shi Qingxuan, seemingly perpetually next to him, and couldn’t help an annoyed sigh.

I’m the glutton; why are you the one with food all over your face?

“Your face is a mess,” He Xuan grumbled, slurping his watery soup.

“Excuse me? I’ll have you know I was consistently voted one of the top three most beautiful go—”

“Your face!” He Xuan interrupted, annoyed. Yes, Shi Qingxuan had been voted one of the top three most beautiful gods and he hadn’t let anyone forget it. Even if the “voting” was at his own birthday party where he’d given the attendees a lot of merits and it was unclear whether anyone else was allowed on the ballot. “You have food all over your mouth, wipe it!”

“I can’t,” Shi Qingxuan said, giving He Xuan grossly over-exaggerated sad puppy eyes. He sighed dramatically. “I only have one good arm, I have to choose whether to eat or wipe my face; I can’t do both…” He sighed again, sounding a bit too pitiful.

He Xuan wasn’t buying it. “That’s funny. Whenever anyone asks if you need help, you act all indignant and tell them just because you have a bad arm and a bum leg doesn’t mean you can’t get by just fine. But now you can’t wipe your own face because of your arm? You can’t have it both ways.”

“Hehe,” Shi Qingxuan giggled. “You’re onto me. A-Xuan, you’re so smart.”

Something…uncomfortable wriggled in He Xuan’s chest at that stupid little giggle.

And it only got worse when Shi Qingxuan just smiled up at him, face filthy but expectant.

“What?” He Xuan tried to snap.

“A-Xuan~” Shi Qingxuan wheedled. “Help me?”

“Do it yourself!”

“I just said I can’t! You’re really not going to help gege?”

“Who’s my gege?!”

“A-Xuannnn!” Shi Qingxuan wailed playfully.

“Shut up!” He Xuan hissed through gritted teeth even as he pulled out a handkerchief and wiped aggressively at the mess around Shi Qingxuan’s mouth.

“Gentle!” Shi Qingxuan admonished.

“If you wanted gentle, you should’ve done it yourself!”

After a quick wince at He Xuan’s (temporary) roughness, Shi Qingxuan grinned. “But you still did it. You’re such a good boy, A-Xuan.”

He Xuan threw the handkerchief at him.

Shi Qingxuan laughed, at least until he picked up the handkerchief and looked at it more closely. “A-Xuan, you meanie! You’d really wipe my face with such a dirty handkerchief?!”

“No,” He Xuan said flatly. “It was a clean handkerchief when I took it out, your face is what made it that filthy.”

Shi Qingxuan stared at the now-grubby piece of fabric. “Is it really that bad?” he asked after a moment, sounding genuinely devastated. Then before He Xuan could answer, Shi Qingxuan continued with an awkward laugh, “Ha ha. What am I saying? Of course it is. Why wouldn’t it be. And it’s not like I have a mirror to see myself…though maybe that’s a blessing…”

He Xuan had started this whole undercover business to assure himself that Shi Qingxuan was indeed miserable. But now that Shi Qingxuan genuinely looked a bit rattled…

“Just eat your soup,” He Xuan grumbled, snatching back his soiled handkerchief. “I’ll wash it later.”

Maybe Shi Qingxuan had truly been so embarrassed about the filthy handkerchief that he forgot about his plan to take He Xuan to visit Xie Lian or maybe he’d never actually meant it and just said it on a whim. Either way, He Xuan was beyond relieved that the topic of visiting Xie Lian (and therefore Hua Cheng) seemed to have been dropped.

Then the person He Xuan least expected showed up at the worst possible time.

“Ah. It really is you,” a handsome, curly-haired youth said, looking at Shi Qingxuan. “How come you get to come down and have fun?”

“Qi Ying?” Shi Qingxuan nearly shrieked, then clapped his hand over his own mouth, looking this way and that to make sure no one overheard. For whatever reason, He Xuan was apparently exempt. Shi Qingxuan hissed, “What are you doing here?”

“I’m supposed to give this to you,” Quan Yizhen said, holding out a large basket full of fruit and a few other foodstuffs, including several bottles of wine.

Shi Qingxuan frowned at it, then accepted it warily.

And nearly dropped it from the weight.

Only slightly rolling his eyes, He Xuan took it without a word.

“But who—?” Shi Qingxuan started to ask, gesturing at the basket. It went without saying that it wasn’t actually from Quan Yizhen.

“Pei Ming,” Quan Yizhen said bluntly. “He wanted to give it to you but didn’t want you to know it was him, so he asked me to do it.”

“Ah…” Shi Qingxuan looked like he so badly wanted to point out that by saying as much, Quan Yizhen defeated the whole purpose. But instead he just smiled and said, “It’ll be much appreciated. Thank you for making the trip.”

Quan Yizhen just shrugged. “It was easy. See ya.” He paused mid-turn. “The fruit’s good. Even though it’s from him, you should eat it.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah,” Quan Yizhen said, apparently not feeling like explaining further and vanishing abruptly.

Shi Qingxuan had a whole new appreciation for Yin Yu’s struggle.

But more importantly, he had a basket full of food. As he investigated the loaded basket and took inventory of the goodies inside, he couldn’t help mumbling to himself.

“Why Qi Ying, though? He’s the worst possible choice if that old scoundrel Pei Ming didn’t want to be found out. I wonder why he didn’t have His High—Ol’ Xie deliver it? He would’ve been much better at keeping a secret, and he visits me enough to be familiar around here.” Shi Qingxuan paused with a thoughtful frown. “When was the last time he visited? It feels like it’s been ages; I hope nothing has happened…”

“I’m sure he’s fine,” He Xuan said, ignoring the fact that he really should have no reason to know that.

“I’m not so sure,” Shi Qingxuan said slowly, tapping his lips thoughtfully. “There was all that talk a while back about evil internal qi and whatnot. Is that Crim—San Lang of his not taking care of him after all?”

The longer Shi Qingxuan pondered, the more He Xuan felt a creeping dread.

“Oh that’s right—I was going to take you to meet him anyway, wasn’t I? Well now we have to go—we have make a trip to his temple and make sure he’s alright!”

He Xuan had managed to avoid this once already; he wasn’t above trying to get out of it again.

“Shouldn’t we share this first?” He Xuan asked, gesturing to the basket. And more specifically, the wine bottles. If it was a heavenly gift it was bound to be potent—especially compared to the rare dregs the beggars got. “It looks like there’s plenty of wine to go around…” he added, knowing Shi Qingxuan’s weakness.

He was the Young Lord Who Poured Wine, after all.

Which was how ‘The Young Lord Who Poured Wine’ ended up both figuratively plastered from wine and literally plastered against He Xuan.

Shi Qingxuan needed his good hand to hold his flask but somehow even his ruined arm managed to wind its way around He Xuan’s, snuggling close.

He Xuan knew it was just Shi Qingxuan’s bad habit left over from his ‘goddess’ days. Shi Qingxuan was too physically affectionate regardless, but once he started traipsing around as a woman, he had no qualms about brushing (or outright squishing) his boobs against people (much to his brother’s and Feng Xin’s dismay, though for different reasons). He Xuan had never so much as glanced at—let alone touched—his fiancee inappropriately yet he knew all too well exactly how it felt to have Shi Qingxuan’s perfect breasts pressed against his arm, hugged into his chest, or smooshed against his back.

…And maybe there was that one time that they never mentioned again where He Xuan had stumbled and fallen face-first into pillowy cleavage.

Naturally, Shi Qingxuan had laughed his (her?) ass off.

Mildly annoyed both at that memory and the current situation, He Xuan glanced down. Shi Qingxuan still shamelessly hugged He Xuan’s arm to his now very masculine, very flat chest.

“Don’t look like that!” Shi Qingxuan laughed, face flushed. He momentarily abandoned his flask to clumsily squeeze He Xuan’s face. “I take it back,” he said with a rummy smile. “Look just like that. You look…you look just like him when you make that face.”

He Xuan couldn’t help arching his eyebrow in disdain.

“Yes! Just like that!” Shi Qingxuan beamed happily. His eyes drooped even as he stared; finally, he helped himself and rested his head on He Xuan’s shoulder with a dreamy sigh. “…used to look at me just like that.”

Shi Qingxuan drifted off, a contented smile on his face.

“Well don’t you two look like a pair of lovebirds!” a semi-drunk beggar catcalled.

“You want us to find somewhere else to drink? Leave you two alone?” another teased.

He Xuan snorted and couldn’t help rolling his eyes. “You know perfectly well he’s like this with everyone.”

The two beggars that had been teasing him looked at each other a bit puzzled.

“Ol’ Feng? Like that?”

He Xuan suddenly had a bad feeling. Surely they were just trying to trick him, right? This was still part of their teasing..?

“Yes,” He Xuan insisted. Too rattled, he added, “He’s always been like this,” before he caught himself.

One of the beggars gave a wry snort. “Always been like that with you, maybe,” he said.

He Xuan didn’t have time to be thankful they hadn’t picked up on his verbal slip; not when it felt like there was a giant stone in the pit of his stomach and was Shi Qingxuan really drooling on his shoulder right now—?

“But I’ve seen him,” He Xuan tried to argue. “Patting people on the back, slinging his arm around your shoulders…”

“Oh sure, there’s a bit of that,” one of the men agreed. “Now. Wouldn’t let anyone touch him at first! Couldn’t go near him at all without him freaking out and screaming his head off.”

“Right?” the other one laughed. “So it’s quite a sight to see him all cuddled up to someone like that.”

But…but he does this with everyone! He Xuan opened his mouth but the words wouldn’t come. It has nothing to do with m—

“Guess you’re the lucky one!” one of the beggars crowed, the other laughing along as if it was the most hilarious joke in the world.

It is, He Xuan realized, watching the pool of drool on his shoulder slowly grow bigger. It’s the most hilarious joke in the world.

Unfortunately, while heavenly wine was potent enough for a temporary drunken distraction, it did not leave Shi Qingxuan with a hangover. Apparently his tolerance was innate and not connected to his former godhood.

Well, regardless, He Xuan’s attempt at delaying their departure to Xie Lian’s temple bought him the one evening and that was it. Now that Shi Qingxuan had convinced himself that there might actually be something wrong or that Xie Lian could be in trouble, nothing could deter him from going any longer.

He Xuan wanted to ask what exactly Shi Qingxuan thought could happen to Xie Lian when he had the world’s most vicious, overprotective guard dog at his side but since that would give too much away he just bit his tongue and resigned himself to the journey.

“Hey, um…” He Xuan said once they were out of the city. “I know you’re worried about your friend—”

“He’ll be your friend too!” Shi Qingxuan chirped.

No, I don’t think he will!

Oblivious to He Xuan’s inner retort, Shi Qingxuan prattled on. “Won’t that be great? You’ll have two friends now! Though don’t worry, I’ll still be your best friend, I won’t let His High—Ol’ Xie steal you away from me that easily.”

He Xuan resisted the urge to sigh at how easily Shi Qingxuan apparently adopted ‘best friends’. He pretended not to hear, asking, “Anyway, do we have time for a little stop?”

“Already?” Shi Qingxuan looked at He Xuan’s very normal, very healthy legs and laughed smugly. “Don’t tell me you’re already tired? Look at you, a big, strong young man and you can’t even keep up with me when here I’m down a leg!”

“That’s not it at all!” He Xuan huffed. “I wanted to show you something—”

“Oh, A-Xuan, you don’t have to make things up just to get a little breather. It’s alright, if you need to rest, we can take a little break—”

Annoyed, He Xuan grumbled and veered off into the brush.

“A-Xuan! Where are you going! You said you were tired, why are you stomping around in the trees!” Shi Qingxuan hollered after him.

“Do you not listen to people?” He Xuan snapped back at him, already knowing the answer. “I didn’t say I was tired, I said I wanted to show you something! Are you coming or not?”

“I’m coming, I’m coming, don’t be mad!” Shi Qingxuan wailed, struggling through the brush and branches. “A-Xuan, don’t leave me—”

“I didn’t,” He Xuan said, stopped and waiting at the edge of…

“A hot spring?” Shi Qingxuan asked, disbelieving wonder in his voice. “A-Xuan?”

“Mm,” He Xuan replied, inexplicably feeling a little embarrassed.

“How did you find this? This has been here the whole time? Ah, you sneaky boy, this is why you’re not as filthy as the rest of us, isn’t it?” Shi Qingxuan asked, firing a barrage of questions and per usual not waiting for an answer. “I can’t believe you’ve been hiding something so great the entire time!”

Truth be told, He Xuan hadn’t been ‘hiding something so great’ the entire time—this hot spring hadn’t existed a few days ago; he’d called it forth just for this purpose. His affinity was already water and now with no Water Master in the heavens to challenge him, Black Water ruled undisputed; his control far surpassed just the South Sea. Any water was his to command.

But he’d rather bite off his own tongue than admit he kind of built Shi Qingxuan a hot springs bath.

“I thought…since we were visiting your friend and all, that you might want to clean up a bit first,” He Xuan explained.

And maybe by showing you this goodwill and having you show up looking clean and mostly healthy I’d hopefully be more likely to survive this encounter with Xie Lia—His Highness and his guard dog.

“A-Xuan!” Shi Qingxuan looked at him, eyes shiny with emotion and bottom lip trembling. “Oh, A-Xuan, that’s so sweet! You’re so thoughtful! You’re so good to me.”

He Xuan about choked.

“Just…just get in there and wash up,” He Xuan gruffed, trying to sound unaffected. “Quit acting like it’s a big deal; not like I made it for you or anything.”

“You couldn’t stop me from getting in at this point!” Shi Qingxuan said and immediately began shucking his clothes.

“Do you need help?” He Xuan asked, shaking his own arm and jutting his chin at Shi Qingxuan’s bum leg.

Why did I say that? Didn’t I do this to watch him struggle? Why would I help?!

“N-no, I’m alright. I’ve gotten used to it,” Shi Qingxuan replied, actually a little touched at the offer. A second later he added, “Thank you, though. But could you..?” He made a little circle with his finger, gesturing for He Xuan to turn around.

He Xuan turned around to give him privacy; he’d seen Shi Qingxuan’s naked body enough times it’s not like he needed to see it again. He was just pondering why that statement seemed a bit off when he heard the telltale sound of water rippling as Shi Qingxuan waded in. That and the delighted sigh was a dead giveaway. The breathy sigh tapered into a whimper and was almost too obscene, causing He Xuan to turn around before he even realized what he was doing—

“Ah, don’t peek!” Shi Qingxuan warned, playing coquettish even now. Then he laughed deprecatingly. “I’m quite a mess these days…”

“So you weren’t always like this?” He Xuan asked oh-so-casually, turning back around.

Like he didn’t know.

“I wasn’t,” Shi Qingxuan replied. “I told you, I was a god! How many gods do you know are running around with broken arms and bum legs? Of course I wasn’t always this way.”

“Well how many former gods do I know that are running around with broken arms and bum legs?” He Xuan retorted. “What, is that part of the process when you get booted out of heaven or something?”

Obviously He Xuan knew damn well that it wasn’t.

Something sinister curled around He Xuan’s heart, something dark and vicious, poking at this wound of the fallen Wind Master’s. None of the beggars had given He Xuan an answer when he’d tried investigating, which meant the truth behind these injuries was something Shi Qingxuan guarded closely, a shameful, painful secret he—

“Listen, I was a little nuts afterward, okay?” Shi Qingxuan said, sounding perfectly normal. Almost. “I…I’m used to being light as the spring breeze, the wind following my every command. So I…I jumped off a building thinking I could fly, alright!”

He Xuan gaped incredulously.

That’s what had happened?! Are you really such an idiot?

He Xuan had already known that Shi Qingxuan was a mess; he’d been so shocked by all that had happened and witnessing his “best friend” yank his beloved older brother’s head off his shoulders that he’d screamed himself voiceless, too terrified to even faint, ultimately unable to do anything but just stare blankly ahead.

And that was the state He Xuan had left him in when he’d dropped him in the capital. Catatonic—but intact.

So when he might’ve just happened by sometime later and seen Shi Qingxuan, hobbling and broken, he was completely mystified as to what the hell happened in such a short amount of time.

“Why didn’t you get it fixed?!” He Xuan asked, not bothering to question why he was so furious. He was so mad he nearly turned around again to yell at Shi Qingxuan face to face. “Even poor, there had to have been…there are…some doctor would’ve—!”

“It’s fine, it’s fine!” Shi Qingxuan said, waving it off.

“It’s not fine!” He Xuan argued.

“Why are you so angry?” Shi Qingxuan asked, rightfully puzzled. “It’s my arm and leg, not yours, what are you so mad about? And if I say it’s fine, it’s fine! I didn’t need to try to get healed up—this is my…I know you’ll think it’s dumb but this is nothing compared to what—”

“Nevermind,” He Xuan gritted out through a clenched jaw. He didn’t want to hear it. This was his what? His penance? His atonement? It was nothing compared to what? Having his fate exchanged with one of those poor wretches back in Black Water Manor? Nothing compared to the years of hell that He Xuan and his innocent family went through?

He Xuan was livid, emotions roiling out of control in a way that was extremely rare for him. His mind spun with possible answers, answers he told himself he didn’t want. And the more he thought of Shi Qingxuan’s limp arm and lame leg and the fact that he willingly didn’t get care for them out of some sick sense of justice infuriated He Xuan so much he lost sight of everything—

Until a giant splash brought him back to his senses and he whirled around.

He opened his mouth, barely stopping himself from calling Qingxuan?!

“Call me ‘ge’” echoed in He Xuan’s head.

Like hell! You can drown first!

He Xuan settled for, “Hey! Are you alright?”

There was a bit of dejected sputtering before Shi Qingxuan completely resurfaced, face red with embarrassment and the heat of the water, and grumbled, “I’m fine. I told you I don’t need help; I’m fine.”

Shi Qingxuan recovered his footing and wiped uselessly at his face and smoothed back the strands of wet hair that had escaped his bun. He stood waist-deep in the pool, still facing away from He Xuan as he resumed ineffectively trying to scrub parts of his back. It was likely the wriggling around trying to reach that caused him to slip and go under in the first place.

With all of their togetherness over the years—and Shi Qingxuan’s overly friendly and physically clingy nature—He Xuan was surprised that the sight was so new. Not exposed to the sun like the rest of him, the skin of Shi Qingxuan’s back was still relatively pale, his shoulder blades perfectly beautiful, if a little overly pronounced from being underweight. Even in his male form, Shi Qingxuan was on the slender side, so if this was all a person saw, they might think Shi Qingxuan was a delicate and demure youth.

But once he started his incessant chattering that would shatter all illusions, He Xuan thought with a snort.

Shi Qingxuan startled, flailing in the water at the suddenness of He Xuan’s cool fingertips trailing along his spine; He Xuan caught him with a firm hand around his arm before Shi Qingxuan could slip and go under again.

“A-A-A-Xuan!” Shi Qingxuan stammered, face red. “W-what are you doing, you promised you wouldn’t peek—”

“You told me not to; I didn’t promise I wouldn’t,” He Xuan replied evenly, stealing Shi Qingxuan’s ratty washcloth. Before Shi Qingxuan could squawk indignantly, He Xuan added, “I’ll wash your back for you; you can’t reach, can you?”

“How’d you sneak up on me?” Shi Qingxuan asked. “I didn’t even hear you get in.”

Of course he didn’t; if anyone could slip into the water without the slightest ripple, it would be Ship-Sinking Black Water.

“You were making too much noise,” He Xuan lied. “That’s why you didn’t hear me.”

Shi Qingxuan argued and fussed but He Xuan knew plenty well how to tune him out. Now that he was closer he could see the red splotches on that pale back, likely bug bites and abrasions from the coarse clothing. There were a few bruises scattered here and there—the result of his own clumsiness, sleeping on hard, uneven surfaces…or the occasional asshole, throwing stones at the less fortunate.

Shi Qingxuan no longer wore robes made of divine silks, imbued with heavenly protection that caressed the skin like a lover’s touch. He no longer slept on a bed softer than a cloud.

No, he wore what he could find—no matter how filthy, stiff, and chafing it was. And he slept wherever he could—no matter the stench, the bugs, and the way the straw poked or the rocks jabbed him.

He Xuan gently, silently sponged the grime away, guiding the washcloth over the too-pronounced knobs of Shi Qingxuan’s spine and the indentations of his ribs.

Sure, Shi Qingxuan’s face had looked a bit more gaunt than when he was a god but with the rest of him hidden underneath those rags…

He’s so thin. He’s too thin.

“W-what—” It wasn’t until Shi Qingxuan cleared his throat that He Xuan realized for once he hadn’t been speaking either. “What are you being so delicate for, A-Xuan? If you’re gonna do it, give me a good scrub!”

He Xuan glanced again at the bruises and scrapes littering skin across nothing but bones.

Wordlessly, he reached up and undid the worn cord binding Shi Qingxuan’s soaked hair, letting it fall free from its messy bun.

“A-Xuan?!”

“You already got it wet when you went under,” He Xuan said rationally. “Might as well wash it while you’re here.”

How many times, conned into taking a female form for some flimsy reason or other, had Shi Qingxuan insisted on doing He Xuan’s hair? Pulling it free, brushing it out, braiding it, twisting it, unbraiding it, untwisting it, only to brush it out again and do it all over? With transformation magic it could have been done in seconds…

So why had He Xuan sat there for hours, letting Shi Qingxuan dance her fingers over He Xuan’s scalp and through her midnight hair as she chatted and giggled?

He Xuan had always told himself it was part of the act, part of the job. But really…he’d let Shi Qingxuan get away with way too much.

“Are you saying my hair stinks? Alright, fine, I don’t wash it often. I rarely get the opportunity and it’s…it’s a bit tricky one-handed…” Shi Qingxuan muttered.

“I’ll do it,” He Xuan said.

“I can do it!” Shi Qingxuan panicked.

“I can do it better,” He Xuan said blithely, lathering the soap he’d manifested from his sleeve before running his fingers through Shi Qingxuan’s hair.

At first Shi Qingxuan seemed to be frozen stiff with embarrassment. But in no time at all He Xuan could feel Shi Qingxuan relax against him.

He Xuan had spent so many centuries thinking, overthinking, planning, plotting, analyzing. Yet somehow, with his hands a bit sudsy, working soap through Shi Qingxuan’s hair and massaging his scalp, He Xuan kind of forgot to think at all.

“I’m sorry, A-Xuan!” Shi Qingxuan suddenly blurted.

Embarrassed at having lost himself so completely in the moment, He Xuan stopped, readying some scathing barb—

Until he realized he had no clue what the hell Shi Qingxuan was actually apologizing for.

“…for what?”

“You haven’t been with us for very long; you aren’t used to living like this,” Shi Qingxuan near-blubbered. “Doing something like this is probably really gross to you. I’m so sorry! Back when I was a god, my hair was beautiful and silky and shiny and lovely and pretty and smelled nice and—and now it’s none of those things!”

He Xuan sighed. “Why are you worried about something stupid like that?” Then he couldn’t help but add, “It probably wasn’t all that nice anyway.”

“A-Xuan!” Shi Qingxuan exclaimed, horribly wronged.

A laugh nearly escaped He Xuan but he managed to turn it into a scoff at the last second. “Just shut up; you’ll get soap in your mouth.”

Of course, being Shi Qingxuan, shutting up was something he just couldn’t do.

“Oh, right—where did this soap come from anyway? It smells really nice!”

“Does it matter where I got it?”

“You didn’t steal it, did you?” Shi Qingxuan asked in a whisper.

“No!”

“Whew. That’s good. I don’t want my precious A-Xuan resorting to a life of crime just to get soap for my hair.”

“What makes you think this soap is just for you? Maybe I had it from something else. Maybe I found it.”

“Aww, don’t be shy,” Shi Qingxuan teased. “Whether you had it, bought it, or just found it, you’re using it on me. I feel so special!”

“Well, don’t.”

Shi Qingxuan laughed, not at all deterred by He Xuan’s affected surliness. “Hey, A-Xuan?”

He Xuan didn’t like the sudden soft tone and didn’t answer.

Shi Qingxuan naturally didn’t care and continued even without a response. “Why are you doing this?”

He Xuan’s hand stilled where he’d been unthinkingly massaging Shi Qingxuan’s neck. What did he mean, why are you doing this? Had he been found out? Surely if Shi Qingxuan had caught on, he wouldn’t be letting Black Water Demon Xuan shampoo his hair? Would he? But what else could he mean? Wasn’t he asking why was Black Water back, tormenting him—

“Why are you being so nice to me?” Shi Qingxuan continued. Then he gasped, apparently realizing an answer to his own question. “Could it be..? A-Xuan, you…you like me?”

He Xuan had no words. It wasn’t too late to choke him, was it?

Shi Qingxuan took his silence for admission. “A-Xuan! You act like an old grouch but you really like me! You want to be my best friend, don’t you?”

“Close your eyes,” He Xuan said.

He Xuan’s low, serious tone and the way his lips nearly grazed Shi Qingxuan’s ear startled him slightly and it took Shi Qingxuan a second to even understand what He Xuan had said.

“What? Wh—” The word was cut off into nothing but gurgling as He Xuan forcefully shoved Shi Qingxuan’s head underwater.

“A-Xuan! What was that for?!” Shi Qingxuan sputtered angrily as he resurfaced.

“Rinse,” He Xuan said innocently.

“Ah, okay…” Shi Qingxuan conceded. “But A-Xuan, don’t you need to rinse off too?”

Shi Qingxuan didn’t wait for an answer, instead launching himself at He Xuan and tackling him into the water with a big splash.

“I can’t believe you bought me new clothes,” Shi Qingxuan chittered happily, patting his new-used robes as He Xuan dutifully tied up his hair.

“I didn’t buy them,” He Xuan said for what already seemed like the umpteenth time. “I told you, I did some work for a guy and this was all he had to pay me with, so I took it. …Though you’re lucky I gave them to you after that stunt you just pulled.”

Shi Qingxuan just gave a delighted little ‘hehe.’ “Oh, you act so serious, but you had fun playing in the water, don’t think you can fool me.”

Standing behind Shi Qingxuan to comb his hair, He Xuan rolled his eyes. “I should’ve just drowned you when I had the chance,” he muttered, maybe smuggling in a little bit of nicely scented hair oil while Shi Qingxuan was distracted admiring his new clothes.

You used to wear the finest, most expensive divine robes and now you’re over the moon over some worn, second-hand clothes of coarse cloth.

“To think, I used to wear the best clothes in the heavens, and yet your gift made me so incredibly happy,” Shi Qingxuan murmured.

He Xuan’s hands faltered, incredibly uncomfortable. It was bad enough for him to think it to himself; it was another thing entirely for Shi Qingxuan to say it aloud.

“I told you, it’s not a gift,” He Xuan said. “It’s just something I took as payment and didn’t want, so I gave it to you.”

“Yes, you gave it to me, so it’s a gift.”

“Think of it more like I threw it away and you picked it up off the ground,” He Xuan explained, tying up Shi Qingxuan’s hair with a new ribbon.

Shi Qingxuan caught the flash of the new, light teal ribbon out of the corner of his eye.

“You’re going to a lot of effort to make me look pretty,” Shi Qingxuan pointed out, trying to sound wary but unable to hide the delight in his voice. Then he gasped, eyes wide. “Wait, are you getting me all dolled up to sell me off? A-Xuan! How could you? After I saved you from traffickers you’re going to turn around and sell me to them?! I know I’m lovely and would fetch a high price but still—”

He Xuan clapped his hand over Shi Qingxuan’s flapping mouth.

“Maybe I just wanted to make a good impression on your friend,” He Xuan said. It wasn’t entirely a lie; this might increase his chance of survival after meeting Xie Lian and Hua Cheng after all.

“Aww, that’s so sweet,” Shi Qingxuan said, sounding a bit muffled behind He Xuan’s palm.

Disgusted, He Xuan pulled his hand away and wiped it on his pants, trying to get the spit off.

“Traffickers might not be out of the question though…” he muttered.

Shi Qingxuan just laughed and grabbed him around the wrist, tugging him on their way.

He Xuan still held out some hope that the temple would be empty when they arrived; after all, there were several places Xie Lian could be at any given time and He Xuan happened to know he spent most of his time in Ghost City at Paradise Manor.

But of course He Xuan’s luck couldn’t be that good—of course the two were at the gaudily-renovated Puqi Shrine, looking pleasantly unsurprised to see them.

“Your High—Ol’ Xie!” Shi Qingxuan exclaimed, sincerely thrilled to see Xie Lian. “I was so worried about you!”

“Worried? About me?” Xie Lian asked, puzzled.

Shi Qingxuan explained at rapid pace how Quan Yizhen’s visit plus not seeing Xie Lian for a while plus Heaven’s Eye’s comment ages ago about ghost qi equalled Shi Qingxuan being certain that something unfortunate must have happened. Obviously unsure of whether to laugh to cry, Xie Lian assured Shi Qingxuan that no, everything was fine, there was nothing to worry about, and added with pink-tinged cheeks that Hua Cheng was taking very good care of him.

“But it’s nice to see you,” Xie Lian said, registering Shi Qingxuan’s mostly-clean clothes and his fresh-scrubbed appearance. “You look well.”

“Ah, thank you,” Shi Qingxuan said, puffing up a bit. “It’s all because of—ohmygosh, I haven’t introduced you! That’s part of the whole reason we came!”

Xie Lian just smiled patently, waiting.

“Your Hi—Ol’ Xie, this is my new friend, A-Xuan! This and that happened and I saved him and found out he was down on his luck, so he’s one of us for now—I’m looking after him.”

Hua Cheng didn’t bother to hide his snort.

“Nice to meet you,” Xie Lian said warmly; He Xuan gave a polite nod, trying to avoid eye contact without appearing too rude.

“And, A-Xuan, this is my good buddy, Ol’ Xie. And behind him there is his…” Shi Qingxuan was stumped for only a second before barreling ahead with a confident smile. “His San Lang.”

“Nice to meet you,” He Xuan said, wondering yet again how he let Shi Qingxuan talk him into this.

“Mm,” Hua Cheng hummed, an irreverent but very dangerous smile on his lips.

He Xuan didn’t know yet if Xie Lian knew who he was but he could definitely read the room better than Shi Qingxuan.

“I see you have new clothes!” Xie Lian exclaimed, trying to dissipate some of the tension.

“A-Xuan found them!” Shi Qingxuan chirped, doing a spin, albeit a bit jerky compared to his past grace.

“They suit you,” Xie Lian said with a smile.

“…Though one should be careful accepting clothes,” Hua Cheng pointed out idly. “You never know when the giver has ill-intentions.”

“What do you..?” Shi Qingxuan trailed off, puzzled. Then his eyes widened as he put it together, clapping his hand against his thigh. “You don’t mean that stinky Brocade Immortal? That’s locked up anyway, isn’t it? A-Xuan would never give me something so gross but then again, he got it as payment so maybe…A-Xuan! Hurry—tell me to jump and see if I can disobey. Wait—you tell me to shut up all the time and I never do, so I’m sure—”

“I’m sure it’s fine,” Xie Lian said gently, interrupting Shi Qingxuan’s rambling. “Besides, he looks like such an honest, upstanding young man—don’t you think so, San Lang?”

He Xuan just smiled stiffly at the undeserved praise. Your Highness! You really are too easy!

“You’re right, gege,” Hua Cheng said, smile on his face but ice in his tone. “He does look like such a nice kid.”

He Xuan didn’t need to look over to know that Hua Cheng was glaring daggers at him. Please don’t say anything remotely nice about me, Your Highness! Do you secretly hate me to sic this rabid wolf on me like that?!

It did occur to him that if Xie Lian actually knew who he was, a demon wearing a youth’s skin, the same demon that hurt Xie Lian’s friend, well. Xie Lian probably would hate him.

“Your friend has walked a long way, gege—you two should rest and have some tea. San Lang will go chop more firewood for the stove,” Hua Cheng said. A second later, his hand clamped down on He Xuan’s shoulder, fingers digging in painfully. “You will come help me, won’t you.”

It wasn’t actually a question.

Outside, Hua Cheng set E’ming to chopping while he and He Xuan pretended to chat about nothing, having their real conversation using spiritual communication.

“Coming here was not my—” He Xuan said immediately.

“Not your will,” Hua Cheng finished for him. “That’s what you always say yet…here you are.”

“What was I supposed to do? He wouldn’t take no for an answer! He was so worried Xie Lia—”

“Who?” Hua Cheng’s voice was chilling, even just as a thought.

“—His Highness was sick or in trouble, he insisted on visiting.”

“That still doesn’t explain why you are here.”

He Xuan…didn’t actually have an answer for that.

“You’re the one who suggested it!” he thought after a moment. “I just took you up on your idea!”

“My idea was to get close and witness his miserable, shit life,” Hua Cheng pointed out, sounding bored of the whole thing already. “What exactly is miserable about a romp in a hot springs and new clothes? You have a very convoluted way of taking revenge.”

He Xuan wanted to argue but just then the conversation from inside the shrine got their attention. It was nothing for two ghost kings to eavesdrop.

“A-Xuan’s been with me for a few months now and honestly, a kid like that should be able to find decent work and get out of the slums. I know that, but…” Shi Qingxuan sighed dejectedly.

“You’ve only known him a few months?” Xie Lian asked, sounding slightly surprised. “You two seem so familiar, I thought you must’ve known him longer.”

“He has that air about him, doesn’t he?” Shi Qingxuan agreed excitedly. “From the moment I met him, he felt familiar, like we’d been friends for ages.” Another heavy sigh. “I think it’s because he reminds me of—”

He Xuan didn’t need to breathe, but he still held his breath. Had he been found out?

“—my ge,” Shi Qingxuan finished sadly.

What?! The nerve of this little twit, comparing him to—!

Hua Cheng’s uproarious, obnoxious laughter filled their private array, grating on He Xuan’s nerves.

He Xuan had thought being Shi Qingxuan’s ‘best friend’ was bad—the only thing worse would be being his brother.

“Your brother?” Xie Lian asked, understandably bewildered. Even knowing Shi Qingxuan’s affection for his older brother, it still was hard to perceive as a compliment.

“Well, they both act mean and gruff but it comes from a place of love. Always nagging but in the end, looking out for me. All that aloofness to hide the embarrassment of being someone who really feels deeply. Caring disguised as coldness.” Shi Qingxuan smiled shyly, then his smile fell as he obviously thought of someone else who fit that category.

But he caught himself a second later. “I guess I’m just weak to that type…ha ha.”

The next moment, Hua Cheng, veritably glowing, stepped through the door, half-dragging a somewhat lifeless He Xuan with him.

“Oh, San Lang,” Xie Lian said, his eyes a bit too bright and his voice little breathy—and rightfully so: Hua Cheng radiating happiness was truly an alluring sight to behold. Fortunately, Xie Lian quickly caught himself and cleared his throat, remembering they had guests. “You’re finished?” He finally tore his eyes away from Hua Cheng long enough to glance at the slightly green He Xuan. “Um, is he alright?”

“All finished, gege,” Hua Cheng said, smile on his perfect lips. “And he’s fine—just hungry from working. How about some lunch?”

“No!” Shi Qingxuan and He Xuan blurted at the same time, though He Xuan by accident; he was still so rattled from being compared to Shi Wudu that he mixed up his actual voice, his communication with Hua Cheng, and his normal thoughts.

Xie Lian looked a bit sullen. “I didn’t bother to cook anything…we have plenty of offerings from the locals to share..?”

“We’d love to,” Shi Qingxuan said, shamelessly changing his tune. He hobbled over to He Xuan, peering at his even-more-colorless-than-usual face. “A-Xuan? Are you alright? Wash up and come sit by me and we’ll eat, okay?” With a frown, he put his hand to He Xuan’s forehead. “You don’t have a fever; if anything, you’re too cold—”

“I’m fine,” He Xuan said, listlessly pushing Shi Qingxuan’s hand away while definitely ignoring Hua Cheng fighting back laughter next to him.

“San Lang,” Xie Lian said ominously once they were alone.

“Gege, it’s not—” Hua Cheng began, then decided better of it.

“It’s not what?” Xie Lian pressed.

“I’m not sure,” Hua Cheng admitted. “Does Wind Master know?”

“I’m not sure,” Xie Lian echoed Hua Cheng with a sigh. “He didn’t particularly act like it…and Shi Qingxuan has never been the best actor and definitely not the best secret-keeper. Usually the moment he has a thought, it’s already halfway out of his mouth.”

Hua Cheng nodded.

“But then again, how could he not know?” Xie Lian asked, almost incredulous. “Really, Black Water was too lazy with his disguise this time! And his acting is the exact same! And he used his own name! What was he thinking?”

Hua Cheng snorted, thinking that Xie Lian was entirely correct and also entirely adorable. “Almost as if it’s not much of a disguise at all, is it,” he mused.

Xie Lian picked up the hint and couldn’t help but frown a little. “What does he want? He already let Shi Qingxuan go once…what is he after now?”

“I’m not entirely sure,” Hua Cheng admitted, then gave in and ran his fingers through Xie Lian’s hair before tucking it behind a perfect, divine ear. “But I promise gege doesn’t need to worry.”

“You promise?” Xie Lian asked, brow still furrowed.

“If Black Water was going to physically harm him, he would’ve done so already.” Hua Cheng kissed the furrow away.

Xie Lian sighed again, leaning into Hua Cheng’s embrace without even realizing it. “You know, San Lang, sometimes I look back on that whole…ordeal. And while it was very complex and gruesome…well, sometimes I wonder…”

Xie Lian trailed off and for a moment it seemed he would leave it at that. But finally, he continued, albeit quietly, “If the former Water Master’s tribulation hadn’t come up, giving Black Water the perfect opportunity, how long would he have waited? He’d already been by Shi Qingxuan’s side for centuries. Would he have just…continued on like that indefinitely?”

“Who’s to say,” Hua Cheng said. “But that part is over, gege doesn’t need to think about it anymore.”

“You’re right; it’s in the past and nothing can be done by worrying about it now. And even if I consider Shi Qingxuan a friend and feel I should warn him about what’s going on…would he even want to know? What if Shi Qingxuan already knows who ‘A-Xuan’ is but doesn’t want to admit it? What if he just plays dumb forever? Will Black Water continue to play along too..?” Xie Lian looked up at Hua Cheng, eyes full of concern and searching for the right answer.

Hua Cheng just smiled ruefully and pulled his god closer, wrapping him completely in his arms.

“The reason I can’t tell gege what Black Water wants is because he doesn’t know what he wants. But to show up in front of the former Wind Master practically as himself…well.”

“He’s spent more time with Shi Qingxuan than anyone else,” Xie Lian murmured. “His family, however precious, wasn’t around for even the span of a normal human lifetime. But he spent centuries with Shi Qingxuan.”

“Mm,” Hua Cheng hummed ambiguously.

“…He misses him, doesn’t he.”

Xie Lian had offered to let the pair stay in Puqi Shrine for the evening rather than make the trip back the same day but both Shi Qingxuan and He Xuan had been quite insistent that they appreciated but didn’t need the hospitality. Shi Qingxuan assumed that they both wanted to stay elsewhere for the same reason: the oppressive romantic atmosphere in the vicinity of those two was just too much!

He had no way of knowing that He Xuan was much more afraid of the oppressive murderous atmosphere.

“Pay them no mind, they’re pretty much always like that,” Shi Qingxuan said as they walked back to the capital. “I know it can be a little much at first but…well, they’ve both waited a long time, I guess, so I’m happy for them. I…well, I wouldn’t really know much about it, but it looks nice, right?”

“Mm,” He Xuan hummed noncommittally.

That should have been the end of it but for some reason Shi Qingxuan was still gnawing on it—mentally and physically, judging by the bottom lip getting dragged between his teeth.

“Say, A-Xuan…do you know what it’s like?”

He Xuan had only been half-listening in the first place and long moved on. “What what’s like?”

“That!” Shi Qingxuan said, flapping his good arm in irritation. “Being lovey-dovey. Do you…do you have someone like that?”

“Mm.”

“‘Mm’?” Shi Qingxuan repeated. “You’re always ‘mm’-ing me and what does that mean? Is that a yes or no!”

He Xuan looked him in the eye, the cold stare sending a sudden shiver down Shi Qingxuan’s spine.

“I did,” He Xuan said tersely. “Past tense.”

“Ah—ahh,” Shi Qingxuan said, clearing his throat and glancing away, feeling like a total ass. And a bit disappointed for some reason that he didn’t want to think about. “S-sorry.”

He Xuan snorted. “Why are you apologizing? Is it your fault?”

No sooner had he flippantly asked the question than words flooded his mind, as crystal clear as if he’d heard them just yesterday:

“Ming-xiong! Ming-xiong! I’m sorry, I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry!”

He Xuan froze, momentarily overwhelmed. Feeling horrible that he’d brought up something still so painful, Shi Qingxuan patted him consolingly on the shoulder and said remorsefully, “Even if it’s not my fault, I’m still sorry for your heart. I’m really sorry, A-Xuan.”

On their way back, Shi Qingxuan sheepishly asked if they could stop by the hidden hot spring again. If they did, they wouldn’t make it back to the capital tonight but that wasn’t particularly a big deal; being summer, camping out in the forest wouldn’t be any worse than sleeping in the niche they’d carved out for themselves in the alleyways.

He Xuan was still a bit traumatized from being compared to that fuckhead Shi Wudu so he was in no mood to help Shi Qingxuan if he decided to bathe again. But he soon found out that’s not what Shi Qingxuan intended at all—he merely wanted to soak his aching feet in the hot water.

It wasn’t until Shi Qingxuan sighed as he dipped his feet, then winced as he started rubbing his bad leg that He Xuan realized the effort and pain it took for Shi Qingxuan to make this trip, especially at the pace they’d set. He felt like an idiot for not realizing it sooner…

Then he felt like an idiot for caring. Wasn’t Shi Qingxuan’s pain and struggle the exact thing he wanted to witness?

“Aren’t you going to soak your feet, A-Xuan?” Shi Qingxuan called over his shoulder. “You should—it feels really good!”

“I’m fine,” He Xuan said quietly.

Shi Qingxuan cocked his head at him and frowned a cute little frown but just replied with, “Suit yourself.” The fact that he didn’t wheedle and coax made He Xuan think he must really be much more tired than he’d let on.

“Ahhh,” Shi Qingxuan sighed loudly after a while. “You know, I sure could use a foot-rub. My poor little feet, so tired and sore from walking all day, keeping up with someone who has two looong, nice, strong, perfectly good legs that can walk much faster much easier…it’s a wonder I have feet left at all, that there aren’t just homely little stumps at the ends of my ankles…sigh…”

He Xuan rolled his eyes at the theatrics. “Yeah, your feet probably are tired from walking all day to see your friend that you decided you simply had to visit.”

Outmatched, Shi Qingxuan gave up and just wailed pitifully, “A-Xuannn…”

“I already helped you bathe earlier today. Helping you once a day is enough.”

“Fine. Then just leave me here to die,” Shi Qingxuan said, falling backwards into the grass, arms akimbo with his feet still in the water. “Go ahead, go on and walk so easily back to the capital and leave me here to be eaten by bears and wolves and tigers because my feet hurt so bad I can’t even move. It’s fine, really—I mean, I only saved your life from those ugly brutes when we first met, I did it out of the goodness of my heart, I don’t need you to feel like you owe me or anything. Even though just a teensy tiny footrub would mean the world to me right now, there’s no need to humble yourself—I’ll just lie here in the—aaaah!” Shi Qingxuan shrieked and bolted upright, eyes wide. “Did you see the size of that bug?!”

For a second all He Xuan could do was stare at this idiot who had been rambling so pathetically and dramatically a moment ago, now hugging himself and shivering because of a stupid bug.

Though He Xuan tried to hold it in, he couldn’t help himself and barked a laugh.

“A-Xuan..?” Shi Qingxuan asked, stunned at the sight. “A-Xuan, are you laughing?”

“No,” He Xuan said, trying to get himself under control, though his lips continued to twitch fighting a smile.

“You laughed!” Shi Qingxuan marveled. “Oh, A-Xuan, you are really cute, you should smile more—”

“I said I wasn’t laughing and I’m definitely not smiling,” He Xuan said, crouching next to Shi Qingxuan and unceremoniously reaching into the water to yank out his feet. “Give me your stupid feet.”

“Stupid feet?!” Shi Qingxuan huffed indignantly. “I’ll have you know—”

“Yeah yeah, they were voted top three most beautiful feet in the heavenly capital or something equally useless, right?” He Xuan said, taking Shi Qingxuan’s lame foot in his hands.

“Ooh, your hands feel nice and cold now compared to the hot spring.”

“My hands are always cold,” He Xuan said, not really paying attention. Instead he just stared at the foot cradled in his hands.

Though it might sound absurd, He Xuan knew Shi Qingxuan’s feet better than his own. How many times had Shi Qingxuan, drunk and happy, kicked off his shoes and flung himself at He Xuan, pleading, “Carry me, Ming-xiong!” with a giggle? How many times had he danced barefoot in divine gardens, pale feet flashing through emerald grasses and fragrant flowers? How many times had he dipped his toes into crystal clear heavenly pools, marveling to himself (so ‘Ming Yi’ could hear) how pale and dainty his feet were—whether he was in male or female form—insisting there were none more perfect in the heavens?

But the foot He Xuan held was completely unfamiliar—no longer pale and smooth as jade, delicate and made for dancing with the breeze. The leg was twisted unnaturally from not being set correctly after the break and shuffling around off-kilter had left the foot gnarled and calloused.

He Xuan must’ve stared too long; self-conscious, Shi Qingxuan tried to pull his foot away.

He Xuan just tightened his grip around Shi Qingxuan’s ankle.

“Let go. I—I—” Shi Qingxuan stammered, actually sounding panicked.

“You said you wanted a footrub,” He Xuan pointed out, securing his grip on Shi Qingxuan’s battered foot and experimentally running his thumb up the arch.

Shi Qingxuan jerked back ineffectively. “I—yeah, I said that, but—well, I was just joking. I never thought you’d take me so seriously, A-Xuan, haha ha…”

He Xuan just hummed and began massaging Shi Qingxuan’s foot.

“Stop!” Shi Qingxuan demanded, voice laced with pain.

Surprised, He Xuan did stop, though he didn’t let go. “Why? Does it hurt?”

“No, it’s…” Shi Qingxuan glanced away, blinking back tears. “It’s ugly.”

“That’s what you’re worried about?” He Xuan scoffed, ignoring the sudden, invisible stabbing in his chest. “Besides, you wailed and went on and on about wanting a footrub—joke or not, you’ve got it now. Don’t tell me it doesn’t feel good.” With a little more pressure, he massaged his thumb slowly up the arch again.

“It does,” Shi Qingxuan whined. He flopped back on the grass, the massive bug apparently long forgotten, and slung his good arm over his eyes. “I’m not gonna look so you shouldn’t look either. Pretend you can’t see it.”

“I won’t look,” He Xuan lied.

“Promise? Promise me, A-Xuan!”

He Xuan didn’t promise; he didn’t say anything at all for a while, instead just focusing on that tragic foot and sending healing power in at such a tiny trickle that Shi Qingxuan wouldn’t notice.

“That guy today has been your friend for a while, right?” He Xuan finally broke the silence. He didn’t wait for an answer before adding, “So you knew him from…before.”

Shi Qingxuan just laughed awkwardly; even he could tell it wasn’t a question so there was no point in trying to deny it.

“Do you miss it?” He Xuan asked quietly. “Your life before? I guess that’s a stupid question—how could you not miss it.”

“Ah…I do really miss the food,” Shi Qingxuan admitted a little sheepishly, even going so far as to sit up and pat his perpetually-empty belly. “Even if gods don’t actually have to eat. I miss the delicious banquets and never feeling hungry. But what I miss the most is…”

The worship? The wealth? Your brother?

“…My friend.”

He Xuan went perfectly still.

“Didn’t we just meet your friend?” He Xuan asked after a second, resuming his massage and playing dumb.

“Oh, not His High—Ol’ Xie,” Shi Qingxuan clarified. “I mean, yeah, he is my friend—a very good friend too! But the person I’m talking about…he was my best friend.”

“If he was your best friend, then where is he now?” He Xuan had asked the question to twist the knife in Shi Qingxuan—so why did it hurt him too?

“He…”

He what? Yanked off your brother’s head? Stole your godhood? Wait, you stole my godhood first so it wasn’t yours in the first place for me to steal back, it was mine…

Shi Qingxuan tried smiling; it was a weak and pitiful thing. “He left.”

That was not the answer He Xuan expected.

“Don’t get me wrong!” Shi Qingxuan hurried to explain. “It’s not like he abandoned me or anything like that. It wasn’t his fault—I’m the one who…I did something horrible. I didn’t mean to, I didn’t even know, I swear! But even so…”

Shi Qingxuan’s breath quivered as he struggled to to calm himself then he looked straight at He Xuan, his bright eyes shiny with nascent tears.

“Even so, what I did was unforgivable.”

He Xuan was the first to look away.

Wiping at his eyes before the tears could fall, Shi Qingxuan huffed a deprecating laugh. “I thought I was done talking about all this old sad stuff. But you come around and for some reason I can’t shut up.”

“Have you ever been able to shut up?” He Xuan retorted before he could help himself.

“A-Xuan!” Shi Qingxuan squawked, all of the tension immediately evaporated. “You were the one that asked so I told you! And you dare say I talk too much? See if I tell you anything ever again!”

Even though He Xuan’s unbeating heart was a mess, he still was able to separate that for a moment and snorted. “I’m pretty sure you will.”

“Damn right I will!” Shi Qingxuan agreed, on an incomprehensible tear. “It’s a compliment, you know! Everyone else just thinks I’m cute and quirky all the time. I don’t tell this painful stuff to just anyone, A-Xuan—you should feel special!”

Being a ghost, He Xuan didn’t need to sleep. So he spent the night deep in thought, Shi Qingxuan snoozing away on the forest floor next to him.

“I did something horrible. I didn’t mean to, I didn’t even know, I swear!”

He Xuan knew—had known for a long time—that Shi Qingxuan really didn’t know. Part of the reason for infiltrating heaven and getting close to Shi Qingxuan was to see how much he knew and if he felt any remorse but it had taken no time at all to figure out that he’d been left completely in the dark.

He had absolutely no clue.

“I did something horrible.”

But Shi Qingxuan was blameless…

No, that couldn’t be right. Sure, he didn’t know, but that didn’t prevent him from living the life He Xuan was supposed to have, for being happily oblivious for centuries while He Xuan’s family suffered and died around him and He Xuan himself was relentlessly hounded by bad luck and ill fortune that should’ve been Shi Qingxuan’s to bear.

Yet…

As he looked up at the stars, He Xuan considered…if he had (quite hypothetically) resorted to stealing food at the expense of another’s starvation to feed his dear little sister, would he expect his sister to be punished just because she’d enjoyed the meal?

No no, that was grossly oversimplifying things, right? …But, then again, was the question not even a little valid?

Wait, why was he arguing with himself—and in Shi Qingxuan’s favor?! Hadn’t he already taken his genuine ignorance into account when he’d opted not to change Shi Qingxuan’s fate? It certainly wasn’t like he’d made that decision based on something as ridiculous as sentiment or emotion.

Suddenly irritated and irrationally frustrated, He Xuan glanced over at sleeping Shi Qingxuan, currently frowning in his sleep and occasionally shivering even in the warm summer night. Feeling somehow less annoyed than a moment before, He Xuan pulled the outer robe he’d spread as a blanket more securely over Shi Qingxuan’s frail-looking shoulders.

He Xuan lost track of how long he stared at this Shi Qingxuan, wearing little better than rags and his body so mortal, wounded, and weak.

Isn’t this what I wanted?

Just then, He Xuan remembered Shi Qingxuan’s earlier comment:

“I thought I was done talking about all this old sad stuff. But you come around and for some reason I can’t shut up.”

He Xuan frowned. So he reminds Shi Qingxuan of painful memories? His presence causes Shi Qingxuan pain?

…Wait, wasn’t that the goal?

So why did it hurt a bit to think about?

Whatever. That was the goal so…so if he made Shi Qingxuan miserable—well. He’d just have to stick around little longer then, right? And make him more miserable?

He Xuan had been thinking it was probably time for him to leave but apparently his work wasn’t done yet. No, he…he needed to stay a bit longer and see this through.

Upon their return, the other beggars noticed instantly that Shi Qingxuan was returning somewhat cleaner and in less-threadbare clothes and their interest was immediately piqued. Shi Qingxuan had opened his mouth to proudly flaunt that it had all been A-Xuan’s doing—but A-Xuan had smacked his hand right across Shi Qingxuan’s open mouth and spouted off a beautifully effortless lie about how it all came from “that Daoist friend.”

Behind A-Xuan’s hand, Shi Qingxuan smiled to himself. His A-Xuan was so shy about silly things. Then again, maybe he didn’t want everyone else to know about his generosity because he didn’t want to have to share.

The thought made Shi Qingxuan feel special all over again, thinking about all of the sweet, thoughtful things A-Xuan had done for him. Showing him the secret hot spring, helping him bathe, gifting him clothes…as well as the new hair ribbon he’d tried to tie without Shi Qingxuan noticing and the hair oil he’d snuck in while combing out Shi Qingxuan’s hair for him. The scent was familiar, even if Shi Qingxuan hadn’t smelled it since falling from grace.

He’d recognize the fragrance of that oil anywhere; he’d used it for decades, after all.

Shi Qingxuan loved to give as much as receive and he wanted to express his appreciation for all of A-Xuan’s kindness. But just words wouldn’t be enough—especially with the way A-Xuan pretended to be all grouchy and gruff all the time. In the past, Shi Qingxuan could’ve gifted him merits or treasures and paid him back tens, hundreds of times over.

But now…

He was a beggar! What was he supposed to give?

No, it wasn’t even a matter of what he should give—what could he give?! He had nothing!

So after a few weeks of thinking and searching, Shi Qingxuan presented A-Xuan with the only thing he had that A-Xuan might even remotely want: a (too hard, kind of old) steamed bun.

A-Xuan’s eyes narrowed as he evaluated the obviously missing section. “You already took a bite?!”

Shi Qingxuan’s face fell a little, then he recovered with an awkward laugh. “Ha ha, you caught me…” Better he just thinks I nipped a bite than pulled off the moldy part.

“Who presents something with a bite taken out of it and dares call it a gift?”

“Hey now!” Shi Qingxuan bristled indignantly. “I know what you’re thinking and I used to to think that way too, if I’m honest. But His High—ahem, a good friend of mine gave a half-eaten bun to a guy and that guy was over the moon to receive it! Treated it like a precious gift! The whole thing turned out pretty romantic, even!”

A-Xuan arched a very judgmental eyebrow.

“N-not that I want to be romantic with you!” Shi Qingxuan hurried to clarify, cheeks heating and hand flailing, nearly flinging the bun away accidentally. “J-just…what’s a little bite or two between brothers, is all I’m saying!”

“Who’s your brother?” A-Xuan gruffed, snatching the bun and ripping it in half. He tossed one half in his mouth and threw the other back at Shi Qingxuan, who barely caught it. “I’ve never been.”

No matter how callous and derisive A-Xuan sounded, his tone was so familiar and the words so similar that Shi Qingxuan’s heart felt warm and itchy.

“Who’s your best friend? I’ve never been.”

Shi Qingxuan bit his lips to keep from smiling…but couldn’t help half-tackling A-Xuan with a hug and getting a vicious forehead flick in retaliation.

He Xuan’s “a bit longer” continued from summer into autumn.

And with autumn came Xie Lian and a little proposition for the two of them: it was harvest time in Yushi Country and they were rounding up all the extra help they could get. It wasn’t a paid job but there would be a big, albeit rustic banquet at the end to celebrate and they could eat until they burst.

He Xuan loved food and Shi Qingxuan loved parties and celebrations so they were more than willing to make the trip.

Harvest was organized chaos and He Xuan recognized more than a couple familiar heavenly faces interspersed with the locals. At first he thought Shi Qingxuan would be excited to see his old friends—he was way better at being a social butterfly than actual manual labor—but Shi Qingxuan kept his head down and plugged away.

However, once the work was over and the celebratory banquet was in full swing, Shi Qingxuan could hide no longer. Xie Lian had sought them out and asked to eat together—which was how the two found themselves sharing a table with exalted company of gods and ghost (well, ghosts, including He Xuan) alike.

“It’s not the Mid-Autumn Banquet in the heavens,” Shi Qingxuan mused while chewing on a drumstick. “But it’s still pretty darn good. And at least you don’t have to worry about any embarrassing plays this year, right, General Pei?”

He Xuan did find it a little ridiculous that Shi Qingxuan constantly corrected himself when talking about “His High—Ol’ Xie” yet hardly bothered to hide Quan Yizhen’s real identity when he’d visited or now as he spoke to the other people sitting at their table. Then again, Shi Qingxuan was about as lousy at deception as He Xuan was skilled at it.

However, even with Shi Qingxuan addressing him by name, Pei Ming wasn’t listening. A bit miffed at being ignored, Shi Qingxuan looked to see what had Pei Ming’s undivided attention.

Rain Master was at the open kitchen, cooking up a storm. It was kind of novel, Shi Qingxuan had to admit; he couldn’t think of any other gods that could cook, let alone actually cooked well. (Unfortunately Xie Lian did not count, since failing to produce something edible hardly qualified as cooking.) Not only was her food delicious but she genuinely looked like she enjoyed making it. Her face was a bit sweat-damp from the heat of the ovens, giving her a bit of a lovely glow. She might not be as beautiful as Shi Qingxuan had been as a woman, he thought objectively, but she had a very natural beauty about her.

And Pei Ming hadn’t looked away once.

Shi Qingxuan’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. He knew all the stories of the grudges and bad blood between the two but still…Pei Ming wouldn’t do anything underhanded, would he? But then again, they did have history and she’s showed him up a number of times. And Pei Ming was a martial god, known for solving his problems with violence—

“Hey,” Shi Qingxuan whispered, elbowing He Xuan. “See that guy over there? Doesn’t he look kinda shady, staring at Rain Master like that?”

He Xuan barely glanced over and instead just kept shoveling food into his face. Xie Lian might have given He Xuan a pass for now but Pei Ming definitely would not. He’d pestered Hua Cheng for a long time, trying to find Ship-Sinking Black Water—the Water Master’s killer. He Xuan did not want to attract his attention.

“Just looks hungry to me,” he grumbled around a mouthful.

With a thoughtful hum, Shi Qingxuan had to admit maybe A-Xuan had a point. Rain Master was dishing up food, perhaps Pei Ming really was just starving—

Though gods didn’t starve, did they?

Intrigued, Shi Qingxuan watched as Rain Master actually walked over to Pei Ming and set a heaping plate down in front of him. Shi Qingxuan couldn’t help but hold his breath because Pei Ming’s eyes grew even more intense but something was definitely off because he wasn’t looking at the food at all! He was smiling up at Rain Master and—

“Pei Ming, that old dog!” Shi Qingxuan gasped, aghast, smacking He Xuan’s shoulder in his excitement. “Is he really after our sweet Rain Master?!”

He Xuan snorted. “Quit worrying about things that don’t concern you and eat.”

“How can you say it doesn’t concern me? Rain Master’s been very good to me—if that stinky old scoundrel is going after her, then it’s up to me to—mmph!” Shi Qingxuan glared at the meat bun stuffed rudely in his mouth.

“Eat,” He Xuan said again. “She’s a god, he’s a god. You, however, are not. Those two can take care of themselves and it has nothing to do with you.”

“But—”

“Eat,” He Xuan ordered coldly. Then with a huff, he muttered, “You’re too skinny,” before returning his attention to his own bowl and shoving rice in his face.

Smiling around the bun in his mouth, Shi Qingxuan decided to take He Xuan’s advice. Yes, Rain Master had been good to him but he knew she was no pushover and could handle herself.

So for the time being Shi Qingxuan put stinky old General Pei out of his mind and chatted excitedly with Xie Lian. Xie Lian was seemingly perfectly content at being unable to get a word in edgewise and just kept eating morsels fed to him by Hua Cheng.

Thinking that was kind of cute and knowing how much He Xuan loved to eat, Shi Qingxuan just continued telling his story while slyly pushing his own plate over to He Xuan to finish.

Shi Qingxuan could feel He Xuan’s glare so before he could be barked at yet again to eat, he reached under the table and used his fingertips to write I’m full on He Xuan’s thigh.

Then, just to be sure he was clear, he added You eat.

Satisfied, he gave He Xuan’s thigh a little pat and kept blabbing away uninterrupted.

The evening wore on, food and drink plentiful, and the mood increasingly festive and infectious, whether one was a mortal, god, or neither or both…or maybe something in-between.

At a different table entirely, a sharp young man sat with ledgers open, demonstrating to several villagers a more efficient way of keeping accounts. The young man wore simple robes, dark blue to the point of black, but something about the way they clung to his body made it appear they couldn’t fit him more perfectly.

Judging by the occasional shouts and familiar insults, Feng Xin and Mu Qing had gotten roped into a drinking contest.

Shi Qingxuan laughed, leaning in to be heard over the noise: “Don’t mind them, they’re always like this.”

“Idiots,” He Xuan replied, trying to ignore the lingering feeling of Shi Qingxuan’s hot breath on his ear.

Lang Qianqiu was busy wiping food off of Guzi’s face, then even going so far as to wipe Quan Yizhen’s, scolding him as he did so. As ever, Quan Yizhen was immune—if it wasn’t Yin Yu speaking, then Quan Yizhen didn’t bother to listen; Lang Qianqiu might as well have saved his breath.

Shi Qingxuan smiled to himself as he watched the unsuspecting Lang Qianqiu and the uncaring Quan Yizhen get swarmed by a cluster of girls. Apparently after striking out with Feng Xin and Mu Qing earlier in the evening, the village girls regrouped and their sights on new targets.

Ah, how many times had Shi Qingxuan been surrounded by cute girls at events like these? Flirting with him, asking him to dance—if nothing else, begging for his secrets to such smooth, perfect skin! But those days were long over; the girls would try their luck with oblivious, socially-inept, still-had-rice-on-his-cheek Qi Ying but they didn’t even see Shi Qingxuan. He might as well just be a bump on a log.

Not particularly caring about girls or gods, He Xuan glanced down at Shi Qingxuan’s good foot, tapping in the dirt, keeping rhythm with the music. Parties and banquets had always been Shi Qingxuan’s favorite thing; he loved people, attention, and excess. How many times had Lady Wind Master pulled him into the crowd of people, making him dance? Not only as Ming Yi, but over the years as nameless deputy officials on the periphery, Wind Master (Lady or Lord version) somehow seemed to snag him every time. Posing as junior officials, he feigned delight; as Earth Master, he protested and groaned but for the sake of his mission, ultimately let Wind Master have his way.

In the heavens as gods or on earth posing as mortals, how many times had Shi Qingxuan taken him by the hand, eyes sparkling and smile bright, laughing without a care in the world as they danced?

The memories were so ingrained He Xuan half expected the Shi Qingxuan next to him to grab his arm like always, tugging and begging “just one dance, please?” like he had so many times before.

But then He Xuan looked at Shi Qingxuan’s face.

The sheer, undisguised longing in his clear eyes as he watched the dancers was heartbreaking.

Good thing He Xuan didn’t have a heart anymore.

“Do you want to—” He Xuan heard himself say.

Do you want to what? Dance? He obviously does and he obviously can’t!

“Ah,” Shi Qingxuan said, scratching the back of his neck, embarrassed at being too obvious and getting caught. “No, no—I…I used to…” Shi Qingxuan swallowed thickly and put on a pathetically phony smile. “I think the wine went to my head…or maybe I’m too full, I’m gonna…I’m gonna go for a little walk.”

Trying to clear his head and maybe run away from his memories, Shi Qingxuan wandered to the outskirts of the village, escaping the music and the dancing and the people.

He was limping about, feeling a bit sorry for himself when he spotted someone else who apparently needed a little break—was that Pei Ming sitting under a tree just up ahead? He would have bet money on that playboy being in the thick of things, flirting with those sweet farm girls—wouldn’t the old man actually die if he had to go a day without flirting?

Oh well, this wasn’t all bad. Shi Qingxuan and Pei Ming had definitely butted heads more than once but when it was said and done, the horndog general had been a genuine friend of his brother’s. It might be good for them both to have a little manly chat out here—

“General Pei! Old Pei, what are you doing here, away from all the fun!” Shi Qingxuan said, hobbling over. “Everyone is dancing, it’s not like you to miss out—I want to, but I can’t move all that well with only one good leg but you don’t have that excu—”

Just then, Shi Qingxuan’s eyes finally caught up with his mouth and he not only realized that Pei Ming wasn’t alone but that he was with—

“Rain Master?” Shi Qingxuan blurted in surprise. “What are you doing here? General Pei, are you holding poor sweet Rain Master hostage out here? What are you doing?!”

“Nothing, Qingxuan,” Pei Ming gritted out, completely busted. “I’m not doing anything.”

“A-Xuannn,” Shi Qingxuan whined. “I’m serious! I’m so tired I can’t walk another step!”

“Whose idea was it to ‘go for a little walk’? And then you were practically running down that hill—if you were so tired maybe you shouldn’t have been running around?”

“How could I not run? I was traumatized!”

He Xuan snorted. “I told you, they’re both adults. And besides, weren’t you a god? Pei Ming is notorious—this can’t be the first time you saw something you shouldn’t have. And don’t the kids tease you about reading too many romance novels? Why are you acting so innocent?”

Shi Qingxuan gasped, the very sound of an offended maiden, even if he was currently the furthest thing from looking like one.

Still, with Shi Qingxuan visibly shaken by the whole affair—he had truly come running and flailing, nearly barreling into He Xuan who might have maybe kind of gone to look for him—He Xuan wondered exactly what he’d witnessed to rattle him so.

“M-maybe I’ve read some books once or twice,” Shi Qingxuan said, “but I’d never seen anything with real people!”

“So what did you see?” He Xuan asked in spite of himself.

Having finally hooked He Xuan, Shi Qingxuan grabbed his arm and said very seriously, “At first I thought he’d drug her out there to bully her. But then I realized something and I think…” His voice lowered to a very unnecessary conspiratorial whisper, “He was about to kiss her.”

He Xuan just stared back flatly. “You think he was about to kiss her.”

“Yes!” Shi Qingxuan said, tugging on He Xuan’s sleeve in excitement. “How am I supposed to recover from that?!”

“So you didn’t see anything at all!” He Xuan said angrily, yanking his arm away and nearly pulling Shi Qingxuan right along with it.

“A-Xuan! A-Xuan, why are you so mad? Why, what did you expect me to see?” Shi Qingxuan didn’t wait for an answer. “Oh. Ohmygosh. You didn’t think…that? A-Xuan! You’re too young to be such a perver—”

“No!” He Xuan yelled. “I didn’t expect you to see anything and I didn’t think that at all! And I’m not a pervert! You know what, I don’t care. I don’t care if you think I am. I can’t believe you’re so worked up over something so stupid.”

“A-Xuan, don’t leave!” Shi Qingxuan chased after him as best he could. “Why are you so mad? You’re not a pervert, okay, I’m sorry! I know you’re not! I know you’re a sweet kid—”

“I’m not a kid!” He Xuan fired back, sounding very much like a kid.

“Yes, okay, you’re not a kid either!” Shi Qingxuan agreed readily. “You’re not a kid—after all, you have more experience than I—”

Both of them froze and Shi Qingxuan looked away, embarrassed.

“…do,” he finished weakly.

He dared glance at He Xuan, then laughed awkwardly. “Ha ha…I mean, no wonder I got all flustered and you thought it was nothing…you—you had someone you liked, after all. You even, probably…you might’ve…y’know. You’re—you’re a fine young man, haha, really, um, handsome—and a young man, not a kid, heck, some guys your age have a family and kids and so you probably…with the person you, um, love…d…”

He Xuan was so annoyed by Shi Qingxuan’s erratic, incoherent rambling that he couldn’t even move.

“I probably what? Spit it out!” He Xuan barked.

“You probably kissed her!” Shi Qingxuan blurted in a rush, so loud his voice echoed in the night.

No—the only person I’ve ever kissed was you!

He Xuan was so furious he thought he might actually explode. He would combust here, on some nameless path in some nameless forest on the outside of Yushi village and splatter bits of infuriated ghost everywhere, most of the fragments hopefully landing on Shi Qingxuan’s stupid, idiotic, insufferable face.

Wordlessly, He Xuan turned around and stormed off, not caring if Shi Qingxuan couldn’t keep up. It was better if he couldn’t, actually.

“A-Xuan!” Shi Qingxuan cried, shuffling painfully after him. “I’m sorry! Don’t—please don’t leave me!”

He Xuan refused to turn around. He was going to leave him; even if he didn’t use spiritual power at all, even if he didn’t bother to actually run, he could set a brutal pace and easily leave Shi Qingxuan behind. This whole thing had been stupid, why had he listened to Hua Cheng? No, he couldn’t even blame it entirely on him—even if Hua Cheng had planted the idea, why had He Xuan stayed for this damn long? It was high time he left, and if he left now, Shi Qingxuan trailing behind him, exhausted and pathetic, wailing for him not leave, well. How rewarding would that be? How gloriously satisfying?

“I’m sorry, A-Xuan,” Shi Qingxuan huffed breathlessly, finally catching up to where He Xuan had stopped. “I didn’t mean anything by it, don’t be mad, okay? I’m sorry.” He tentatively reached out and brushed He Xuan’s hand; when that was tolerated, he dared to curl his warm fingers around He Xuan’s pinky. “Please don’t leave me.”

After a long moment, He Xuan finally grunted in vague assent. Shi Qingxuan gave his pinky a happy squeeze then let it go, not wanting to press his luck.

They resumed walking and this time Shi Qingxuan bit back his protests of being tired, though after frantically chasing after He Xuan, he was more exhausted than ever.

“What was she like?” Shi Qingxuan asked after a while.

“Don’t,” He Xuan warned.

Shi Qingxuan didn’t say another word, so he was surprised when after several minutes He Xuan actually started talking.

“She was sweet and hardworking,” He Xuan said, sounding oddly detached, like he was reciting a line from a book. “Pure and beautiful and honest.”

Shi Qingxuan didn’t know what to say to that; of course A-Xuan’s love would be such a person. She wouldn’t be rude or lazy, dirty or ugly. She wouldn’t be filthy and broken, wouldn’t be outrageous and goofy. She wouldn’t whine or beg or complain. She wouldn’t make him mad or squabble with him so that he’d glare or roll his eyes or huff in annoyance.

Something uncomfortable and prickling was stuck in Shi Qingxuan’s throat; it was hard to swallow, hard to breathe—

“…and I loved her very much,” He Xuan finished in a barely audible whisper.

Shi Qingxuan stumbled, his good leg giving out and he fell to the ground.

“I’m okay,” Shi Qingxuan choked out before He Xuan had asked. “I’m okay. I just tripped…” he sniffled, rubbing at his nose.

“What’s wrong? Are you crying?” He Xuan asked incredulously. “Did you hurt yourself?”

“No, no, I…it’s just…she was sweet and hardworking, pure and beautiful…” Shi Qingxuan blubbered, unable to hold back tears. “And I’m none of those things! The way you talk about her, I—not even my female form, if I could still wear it!—could never compare.”

“Of course you can’t!” He Xuan said, appalled. “Why would you even—”

“You miss her so much, I thought maybe if that’s what you like, I was wishing I could try and it would ease your heart a little—”

He Xuan huffed a laugh in spite of himself. “You’re obnoxious enough as yourself; you’d only be more obnoxious imitating someone else.”

“Fine, you’re right,” Shi Qingxuan pouted, flopping over on the ground. “I’m just obnoxious and not sweet or hardworking or a woman so just…just leave me here. Go on. Leave.”

“You’re just throwing a fit because you’re tired and a bit drunk. Get on,” He Xuan ordered, crouching down.

Between the darkness and his own chaotic state of mind, it took Shi Qingxuan a minute to realize what he was looking at and put together what He Xuan meant.

Used to thinking of Shi Qingxuan as an idiot, He Xuan added, “I’ll carry you.”

Honestly they probably should have stayed in the village, passed out wherever convenient like many of the revelers. And He Xuan knew if Shi Qingxuan had gone alone, that’s likely what he would have done. But He Xuan wanted to put some distance between himself and all the gods that had showed up. Even if everyone was busy with their own nonsense and not a single one even noticed him, he still couldn’t resist the urge to get as far away as possible.

So He Xuan maybe felt just a smidge responsible for Shi Qingxuan being exhausted and getting upset.

Although, looking back on it, just because He Xuan wanted to leave didn’t mean Shi Qingxuan had to. He could’ve easily stayed—he had plenty of friends—and walked back to the capital at a pace that suited him.

So why hadn’t either one of them considered it?

“I’m too heavy—” Shi Qingxuan protested in a small voice, rubbing away the tears on his face.

Tired of haggling and getting more embarrassed by the minute, He Xuan hefted Shi Qingxuan onto his back. “Yeah right. You hardly weigh anything. You should’ve eaten more instead of wandering around, spying on people’s love affairs.”

Shi Qingxuan couldn’t help smiling, settling against He Xuan’s back and maybe snugging his good arm a little tighter.

“I ate till I was stuffed and you’re still telling me ‘eat, eat.’ If I didn’t know better I’d be afraid you were just fattening me up to eat me!”

He Xuan scoffed. “You have a long way to go before you’d be even remotely edible.”

“What are you saying? I bet I’d be delicious!” Shi Qingxuan argued.

“What, now you want me to eat you?” He Xuan asked wryly.

“N-no!” Shi Qingxuan said, his face heating for some reason. “I’m just saying…okay, maybe not now, but the old me would have been tender and juicy for sure. And I ate the best food and drank the best wines…how could I not be tasty?”

“Well, now you’re just skin and bones—tough and dry and unappetizing. Your days of being edible are over, I guess. I’d rather eat more of that fake-chicken-actually-snake soup than take a bite out of you.”

Shi Qingxuan giggled, the sound too close to He Xuan’s ear. “Maybe I should fatten you up to eat you instead.”

“Maybe you should walk back after all.”

“I’ll be good, I’ll be good,” Shi Qingxuan promised hastily, glueing himself to He Xuan’s back. “I won’t fatten you up, won’t eat you, won’t even take a little nibble as a sample. I’ll be good.”

Though now that the word “nibble” had been thrown out there so carelessly, Shi Qingxuan was suddenly more aware of the perfect, pale…very nibble-able earlobe right within easily nibble-able distance.

No no no; he must be going crazy. What kind of perverted hypocrite was he—just hours ago he’d been scandalized half to death from Pei Ming almost maybe kissing Yushi Huang and here he was now, swallowing down saliva at the seductive proximity of A-Xuan’s ear.

Ashamed and looking to hide, Shi Qingxuan shoved his face into the crook of He Xuan’s neck, nearly causing him to stumble.

“What is wrong with you now?!”

“Nothing, nothing!” Shi Qingxuan said, hoping He Xuan’s perpetually chilly skin would cool his flaming cheeks. “Just ignore me, I’m fine.”

He Xuan huffed; Shi Qingxuan liked to think it was actually a little laugh but he couldn’t see it for sure. Afraid to say anything more and risk embarrassing himself further, Shi Qingxuan just lazily clung to He Xuan’s back, comforting and familiar, and let the steady pace lull him to sleep.

Remembering something funny, Shi Qingxuan smiled drowsily; He Xuan could feel the curl of lips against his neck. “Haha, remember when I did this for you?”

Centuries of acting barely saved He Xuan from freezing on the spot.

“What are you on about?” He Xuan asked gruffly. “Have you seen yourself? When would you have ever hauled me out on your back?”

“Ahh…right. Nevermind,” Shi Qingxuan murmured. “I’m…I’m so tired, I got confused.”

“Aren’t you always confused?” He Xuan mocked lightly.

“Mm,” Shi Qingxuan hummed ambiguously, pretending to fall asleep.

Soon enough pretending turned to reality and he slept dead to the world, his face burrowed in the crook of He Xuan’s neck.

Ever since the harvest—or what happened after harvest—Shi Qingxuan had felt a bit off. He blamed that rotten scoundrel Pei Ming for some of it; if he hadn’t stumbled upon that whole thing, Shi Qingxuan doubted he would’ve been so rattled or so affected by what happened after.

“After” being…A-Xuan.

If he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, why could he still smell A-Xuan’s addictive scent? Why could he still feel A-Xuan’s cool skin against his lips? His strong back snug against Shi Qingxuan’s chest as he carried him through the night?

“Maybe I should fatten you up to eat you instead.”

It had been a joke! So why was Shi Qingxuan constantly wishing he could take a little bite, catching himself drooling as he wondered how A-Xuan would taste?

What was wrong with him?!

Shi Qingxuan was a complete and utter mess; every time he wasn’t with A-Xuan, he wanted to be. The closer the better! But then when he was nearby, Shi Qingxuan couldn’t help looking at his ears, his neck, his back, his shoulders, his lips—

And he’d blush furiously and desperately want to run away.

The other beggars had all just shaken their heads, muttering to themselves that “Ol’ Feng’s gone nuts again, too bad” which was mildly offensive but maybe not entirely incorrect in this case. But then A-Xuan had looked at him, so concerned, asking if he was feverish or sick and it was more than Shi Qingxuan could bear.

So he ran away and went to the only person he could actually ask about this.

Xie Lian looked a bit surprised at Shi Qingxuan’s visit—and request that they talk just the two of them—but was understanding and pleasant all the same. Xie Lian offered tea and Shi Qingxuan gratefully drank, the words he’d been dying to blab now stuck in this throat. So Xie Lian just stared expectantly at Shi Qingxuan, an easy, slightly bemused smile on his face.

But now that he was here, how was Shi Qingxuan suppose to bring this up? Hey, do you ever think that your Crimson Rain Sought Flower is the best-smelling thing in the world?

He barely resisted smacking himself in the face. Maybe the beggars were right—he had gone nuts again!

“Are you alright?” Xie Lian finally asked.

Not answering the question at all, Shi Qingxuan just blurted, “You really like him, don’t you? Your Crimson Rain Sought Flower?”

Xie Lian coughed slightly, the tips of his ears turning pink. Everyone in the three realms knew it so why did he bother getting embarrassed even now? Maybe because it was Shi Qingxuan, ever unable to read the room and daring to ask so boldly, staring at him with pleading eyes.

San Lang would’ve just replied ‘I do’ with no hesitation at all, why am I like this—

“I do,” Xie Lian admitted, trying to look confident and casual, drawing strength from his mental image of Hua Cheng.

At Xie Lian’s honesty, Shi Qingxuan nodded to himself, only now daring to admit to himself the question he really wanted the answer to.

“Would you still like him if he…what if he, um, did something really bad? Could you forgive him?”

Xie Lian’s brow furrowed a little bit, his mind immediately supplying him with way too many things that Hua Cheng had not “what if” but “totally had” done.

Fortunately Shi Qingxuan realized maybe his question was a bit too vague. “Like if he hurt…your family…”

Xie Lian just frowned thoughtfully; he didn’t really have any family left so it was a bit difficult to even picture. “Like smashing Qi Rong’s head into pulp? I had no problem doing it myself to keep San Lang’s hands clean so—”

“No! Family you actually like!”

“Um, I don’t have…” Xie Lian just trailed off awkwardly.

“Fine, not family!” Shi Qingxuan hurried to clear the air. “Someone you actually care about then! What if he did something to…to that person?”

“Ahh…” Xie Lian winced a little as certain events came to mind. “Well, he bullies Feng Xin and Mu Qing whenever possible, but they aren’t exactly cordial to him either, I suppose...” Seeing Shi Qingxuan’s exasperation, he cleared his throat. “But San Lang never does anything without a reason. Well, things like that anyway. Even when he does things that seem mean, once I ask San Lang to explain…”

Xie Lian just smiled unhelpfully; Hua Cheng was not Black Water, and no matter how Shi Qingxuan tried to very roundabout get the answer he wanted from Xie Lian, it just didn’t add up. Hua Cheng had perfectly reasonable reasons for the things he did (anyone who hurt Xie Lian would get hurt by Hua Cheng in return, it seemed as simple as that).

But even if Black Water had his also “reasonable reasons” for doing what he did…he still gruesomely killed Shi Qingxuan’s beloved older brother.

“This isn’t really about San Lang, is it?” Xie Lian asked gently. “Are you struggling with something? If you ask clearly, I’m happy to offer advice.”

Shi Qingxuan usually didn’t bother with deception or evasiveness but he couldn’t bring himself to “ask clearly” about this.

So instead he just admitted, “I…I could forgive. I think. But I don’t know if I should…”

“Do you want to?” Xie Lian asked simply.

“…What?” Shi Qingxuan asked.

“If you want to, then I think that’s all that matters.”

Very uncharacteristically, Shi Qingxuan was struck speechless and he just stared back at peacefully-smiling Xie Lian.

Could it really be that simple?!

“Okay but…” Shi Qingxuan began, uncertain.

…What if I’m the one that needs forgiven?

“San Lang?” Xie Lian asked tentatively, his earlier conversation with Shi Qingxuan still on his mind.

“Mm?”

“If…if someone did something horrible to someone you love—”

Hua Cheng’s content expression immediately icy and murderous.

“Who? Who hurt you, gege? I’ll take care of them.”

“N-no!” Xie Lian hurried to clarify. “It’s not real—I’m fine! This is all hypothetical!” Hua Cheng raised an eyebrow for him to continue. “Okay, well, say I did something…something cruel…to someone—”

Hua Cheng smiled, his bright white teeth looking especially sharp. “Who is it? Just give me a name and I’ll finish the job for you.”

“No! That’s not…” Xie Lian trailed off, at a loss.

Hua Cheng laughed. “As if you could be cruel,” he whispered. Then he looked at him seriously. “The only person I care about is you, Your Highness. If you ‘did something cruel’ I know you were in the right. If someone dared do something to you…their death is certain. It doesn’t need to be so complicated, does it?”

“San Lang…” Xie Lian tried to sound disapproving but failed miserably.

“Why are you asking these things, gege?”

“Oh, I just…I was worried about a friend, is all.”

“A friend?” A smile played on Hua Cheng’s lips. “Perhaps I should let gege in on a little secret? Not long after leaving here, your friend met someone on the road back.”

“Really?”

“Mm.” Hua Cheng nodded. “No doubt this person has his…reasons…for not wanting to be in the vicinity, yet in spite of himself he ended up here all the same, concerned that your friend would be tired and he wouldn’t make it back to the capital safely.”

“Really?!” Xie Lian asked again. “He…he really came to check on him? Because he was worried?”

“Your San Lang wouldn’t lie to you, gege,” Hua Cheng said. “Besides, something like this is too ridiculous for me to even think up. I wouldn’t even dream of it.”

Xie Lian mulled that over. “San Lang,” he said seriously, “I have a favor to ask.”

“Anything.”

“Next time I start to worry about all this, please just tell me not to bother.”

Hua Cheng grinned, already dipping his head down for a kiss. “Don’t worry, gege; I will gladly stop the words before they even leave your lips.”

Whatever Xie Lian had said—though He Xuan had no clue what that might have been—was apparently exactly what Shi Qingxuan needed to hear. Shi Qingxuan’s bout of insanity suddenly seemed cleared up after his visit to Xie Lian and things returned to normal.

Or as normal as they got around Shi Qingxuan, anyway.

For his part, for all that He Xuan kept telling himself he should think about leaving, he never did quite find the right time and before he knew it, winter was upon them.

He knew from personal experience and some of his previous spying efforts that winter was especially miserable for those living on the streets so he convinced himself that he needed to stick around and witness Shi Qingxuan’s freezing misery from closeup.

What he hadn’t expected was just how close “closeup” would turn out to be.

“My pal His High—er, Ol’ Xie left this for me,” Shi Qingxuan said, proudly showing He Xuan his blanket. “He knows I get kinda prickly about handouts so he denied it but he’s a horrible liar. Anyway, that doesn’t matter—it’s super warm and fluffy! C’mon, let’s share!”

He Xuan eyed the blanket with obvious distaste. Not that there was anything wrong with the blanket itself—but the thought of sharing it was just…

“It wasn’t that long ago you were making up excuses to rub yourself all over me because I’m cool and now you’re making up some crap about cuddling to stay warm?” He Xuan pointed out.

“It’s because I know you have a naturally low temperature that I’m trying to get you to snuggl—er, huddle for warmth. You’re already too cold as it is; if someone doesn’t lend you their body heat, I’ll wake up and you’ll be nothing but an icicle! I’m insisting on this out of concern for you because I’m nice.”

He Xuan just stared back, lip twitching in disgust.

“What’s the big deal, we’re both guys, yeah?” Shi Qingxuan cajoled, even now trying to put on a brave front and suppress a shiver. “You’d rather freeze to death than snuggle a little?”

“Yes,” He Xuan said bluntly.

“What are you so worried about, A-Xuan?” Shi Qingxuan laughed. “Though in the old days, I might’ve turned into a woman right before you woke up, just to tease you with a good scare from waking with a beautiful lady in your arms…but no more of that for me, huh?” He sighed a bit wistfully, then shook his head. “Don’t listen to me, I’m just rambling. Anyway, you should feel honored! I’m willing to share my prized treasure with you.” 

How sad—this former god who’d once been bestowed with countless riches and spiritual artifacts now had a “prized treasure” of a single, grimy blanket.

For all of his resistance, Shi Qingxuan’s chattering teeth and blatant shivers were just too much and He Xuan finally grumbled something vague and curled up to go to sleep. Shi Qingxuan wasted no time snuggling right in next to him and tucking his prized blanket around the both of them.

Would he still cherish it so if he knew who had really given it to him?

Sometime later, Shi Qingxuan’s thrashing woke He Xuan from his half-doze.

Shi Qingxuan’s face was clammy with sweat as he twitched and flailed, whimpering in his sleep, haunted by a nightmare. He Xuan was debating whether to wake him up—shouldn’t he get some satisfaction from watching Shi Qingxuan’s pained, panicked face?—but just as he admitted it really wasn’t doing anything for him, Shi Qingxuan’s eyes snapped open, his chest heaving as if fighting for breath.

Eyes still wild and unseeing, Shi Qingxuan jolted back from He Xuan with a terrified gasp, too afraid to even make a sound.

“Qingxuan?” He Xuan said unthinkingly, the name he’d for so long refused to speak effortlessly escaping his lips—

He’d fucked up.

At the name no one in this slum should say—the name no one here should even know—Shi Qingxuan’s eyes finally focused and he glommed onto He Xuan and he babbled in relief, “It’s you, it’s you! You’re here, it’s you…”

He Xuan was at a complete loss; who the hell was “you” supposed to be? Obviously no one that He Xuan actually was or else Shi Qingxuan would still be recoiling in terror.

But maybe this was a good thing—if Shi Qingxuan was still so muddled as to think He Xuan was someone else, then his little slip of calling him “Qingxuan” could be glossed over and written off as a trick of Shi Qingxuan’s mind as well.

So, He Xuan played along, putting his arms around a quivering Shi Qingxuan.

“Nightmare?” He Xuan asked, because whoever Shi Qingxuan mistakenly thought he was would probably be nice enough to inquire.

Shi Qingxuan still clung to him, trembling uncontrollably, his breaths still erratic. “He’s not here, right?” he whimpered. “Tell me he’s not here. Tell me he’s not here and that he can’t hurt me—”

He Xuan stiffened for a moment, realizing all too late what—or rather, who—Shi Qingxuan had been dreaming about.

He opened his mouth to coax Shi Qingxuan with the words he begged to hear…

He’d lied to Shi Qingxuan for centuries, what was one more? Why couldn’t he say it?

“You’re safe,” He Xuan whispered, surprising himself at the gentleness in his voice; but then again, he’d always been a good actor. And if he hugged Shi Qingxuan a little tighter, smoothed his hair, rocked him slowly in his arms, well... It was all part of the role; the sleep-muddled and terrified Shi Qingxuan likely wouldn’t even remember in the morning. “I promise, you’re safe.”

Your very nightmare is holding you in his arms, but—

“You’re safe.”

Shi Qingxuan stretched and groaned a little, refusing to open his eyes. The sun was already bright and the day started but inside his blanket was so comfortable and warm—did he really have to get up?

“This is hardly a good scare from waking with a beautiful lady in my arms,” He Xuan said, voice gravelly. He hadn’t slept a wink, holding Shi Qingxuan the entire night. Not because he’d wanted to—but because Shi Qingxuan just wouldn’t let go! How could someone with only one good arm and leg cling so tightly?!

“Ah!” Shi Qingxuan startled awake, jerking back. “What’s thi—” Bits and pieces of the night suddenly rose to the surface of his mind and he quickly put together enough of what had happened. “Oh my…I am so sorry!” His hand flew to his blushing face. “I am so—! Ha haha, I can’t believe I did that! How embarrassing!”

“You’re making it more embarrassing by raising such a fuss,” He Xuan grumbled, tossing the blanket aside and starting to rise.

“A-Xuan?” Shi Qingxuan caught him and tugged on his sleeve. “…Thank you.”

He Xuan just shook him off with a hmph and stalked off.

He Xuan hoped that after waking up in such an awkward position, Shi Qingxuan would be embarrassed enough to leave him alone and give him some space. Even though nothing happened happened, something still felt incredibly off and He Xuan wanted some time alone to figure it out. He was not only a ghost but a ghost king, a Supreme—unless it was something massive like a spiritual disturbance, he couldn’t get sick.

So why did he feel this oppressive tension in his chest, slowly crushing and suffocating him? (The fact he didn’t technically need to breathe was hardly relevant.)

He Xuan spent most of the day trying to figure it out and got absolutely nowhere; he was at his wit’s end.

Yet that evening when Shi Qingxuan finally found him, that uncomfortable pressure plaguing He Xuan evaporated instantly…leaving him more boggled than ever.

“A-Xuan!” Shi Qingxuan said, sounding a bit out of breath. “I’ve been looking all over for you, I was terrified you’d run away!”

He Xuan was about to open his mouth and ask, “Why would I run away”—

“I’ve come to take responsibility!”

Any words on He Xuan’s tongue abruptly vanished.

So it took him a minute to finally choke out, “…What.”

“Well, you know,” Shi Qingxuan said, glancing away coyly. “We…hehe…we slept together, after all, and I thought I should take responsibility; I’m not the playboy type, you know—well, actually I’m more the delicate maiden, so in that case maybe you should be the one taking responsibility..?”

“I’m leaving,” He Xuan said through clenched teeth and turned on his heel.

“A-Xuan! A-Xuan, I’m just joking!” Shi Qingxuan lunged for him, managing to grab his arm at the cost of an unsightly stumble. If He Xuan hadn’t reflexively grabbed him back, he would’ve landed on his face. “I’m just joking! You seemed upset and so I wanted to clear the air, I’m just being silly!”

“I’m not upset,” He Xuan said tersely. “Well, I wasn’t.”

“Don’t be, don’t be,” Shi Qingxuan said hurriedly, patting He Xuan’s shoulder. “Please don’t be upset, I was just trying to make you laugh. Which is no easy feat, by the way, and so unfair because you really look super cute—”

At He Xuan’s disapproving glare, Shi Qingxuan abandoned that line of thought and cleared his throat.

“Actually, I just…I wanted to say thank you,” Shi Qingxuan admitted. “Here I bullied you into sleeping—”

He Xuan raised an eyebrow in warning.

“—cuddlin..?” Shi Qingxuan tried. “Er, sharing a blanket with me out of practical necessity to keep from freezing to death? Yes, that’s what I did. Anyway, here I did that and then I ended up making a fool out of myself—and don’t you go saying I do that all the time!”

“I didn’t say a word.”

“You thought it!”

He Xuan couldn’t deny that. “Do you have a point you’re trying to make or..?”

“I’m sorry and thank you,” Shi Qingxuan said earnestly. “I’m sorry for interrupting your sleep, for making you uncomfortable, for crying to you and clinging to you and making you take care of me. But also thank you…” He took a shaky breath then looked straight at He Xuan, eyes shiny. “Thank you for doing all of those things and—and not abandoning me to suffer alone.”

He Xuan tried thinking of what to say, something casual and dismissive, but that obnoxious fucking tension crushing He Xuan’s chest was back and he couldn’t think of anything.

“I wanted to show my appreciation,” Shi Qingxuan continued slowly. “But there’s probably not anything I could do for you that you can’t do for yourself, and better. So I…” He pulled out something from inside his robe. “It may not look like much but it’s all I have so I wanted to give you this.”

“Quit trying to give things away when you don’t have anything in the first place,” He Xuan said. “I don’t need—”

Then he looked at the tragic, mangled object that Shi Qingxuan held out to him.

He would recognize it anywhere—after all, wasn’t he the person who took it, broke it, repaired it, and then returned it?

“This was my beloved treasure…” Shi Qingxuan said, voice soft and sad.

He Xuan struggled to maintain haughty indifference. “Didn’t you say the same thing just yesterday about your blanket? How many ‘treasures’ do you have?”

Shi Qingxuan laughed self-deprecatingly. “My blanket is a treasure now, to the mortal me who is poor and freezing. But this…this was a real divine treasure, a genuine spiritual device. It’s worthless now, though, as you can see. And what’s this silly fan compared to what I really lost?”

He stared at the two halves of broken fan in his hand as if they weren’t pieces of garbage but instead represented two people. “…My brother and my best friend.”

Your friend wasn’t even real! He Xuan wanted to scream. Why do you still mourn him?!

“But, you know, maybe since I don’t have those two super important people anymore it makes the sentiment in this fan all the more valuable,” Shi Qingxuan said. Then, with a little smile, he held it to He Xuan.

“Didn’t you just say this junk was valuable to you?” He Xuan argued, refusing to take it. “Why are you giving it to me?”

Shi Qingxuan laughed prettily, his face like sunshine after a storm, all the gloom from moments before evaporated.

“Didn’t you just answer your own question?” Shi Qingxuan said, eyes sparkling. He gave He Xuan a light tap on the head with the piece of fan before shoving it into his hands. “It’s because it’s my most valuable treasure that I’m giving it to you.”

While Shi Qingxuan slept, He Xuan turned over the pieces of fan in hand. He hardly needed to stare at it so closely for so long when he knew damn well what it looked like—he was incredibly familiar with it both when it was the legendary Wind Master fan and also when it was this ripped piece of junk. The only person possibly more familiar with it was asleep, clutching He Xuan’s sleeve and snoring away.

Staring at the fan, once as glorious and now as broken as its owner, He Xuan’s thoughts and memories swirled out of control.

The squabbling, the piggyback rides, the hot spring, the foot massage. Sharing food, giving him clothes, combing his hair, sharing a blanket.

It was ridiculous to think about; never would He Xuan do any of those things.

And that was just this second stint—the centuries prior were full of even more things that were nearly inconceivable. Things that He Xuan would never do.

But all of those things…they were things that ‘Ming Yi’ or ‘A-Xuan’ would do.

So what about holding him close, rocking him back to sleep? Stroking his hair, murmuring, “You’re safe”?

No—no, He Xuan would never.

He Xuan slowly closed his fingers around the broken fan and glanced over at the man sleeping so soundly, nuzzling into his hand.

…So then who was ‘He Xuan’?

He Xuan still didn’t have an answer for that when disaster struck and he became incapacitated. It hadn’t been that long since Mt. Tonglu’s last reopening and the chaos it had inspired so that couldn’t be the problem. But all his consciousness and reason had been reduced to the slightest fragile thread and it was all he could do to hold himself together from going entirely mad; he had nothing left to investigate or question. He just had to do whatever it took to make it through the pain.

Shi Qingxuan had woken next to him one morning only to find him curled up in a ball, clutching his stomach, shivering as sweat beaded on his burning skin.

“A-Xuan? What’s wrong? What do you need? How can I help?”

“Hungry…” He Xuan groaned.

Hungry wasn’t the word for it—he was starving. Ravenous. Insatiable. He knew that he didn’t need to eat, that he couldn’t starve, that food wasn’t actually the problem or the solution—

But that was all stuff he “knew”…and what he knew in his rational mind was meaningless, swallowed by the overwhelming hunger.

Shi Qingxuan’s face fell. “I don’t…” He obviously did not have food to spare. He didn’t have food for himself, let alone plenty of extra for He Xuan. Still, he gave a resolved nod, trying to stay calm. “I’ll go begging. Busking. Find a little work. Just hold on, I’ll get food somehow—”

Fighting for a moment of clarity from this feverish delirium, He Xuan fumbled for the money pouch he’d kept hidden, nearly dropping it from a trembling hand before handing it over.

“Here,” he gritted out, pained. “Go.”

“I’m going, I’m going! Just hold on, okay!” Shi Qingxuan blubbered, scrambling away.

It wasn’t until he stood in front of a stall, ready to order a mountain of food that Shi Qingxuan realized he had no clue how much money he actually had for spending. Furtively, he opened He Xuan’s money pouch and shook out a few coins—

And a small pearl.

Though he was in an awful hurry, something about that little pearl struck Shi Qingxuan as oddly familiar. Then again how many pearls looked like another? Shi Qingxuan himself had owned hundreds, tossing them out without a care, little tips for the plentiful deputies and assistants throughout the heavenly capital.

For a moment Shi Qingxuan hesitated; He Xuan had seemed nearly mad with hunger, how much food did he need? Would just the coins be plenty? How much would medicine cost? The money wouldn’t be enough for an actual doctor to take a look—should he risk spending the pearl too..?

He Xuan had been living impoverished and without a home for almost a year now, yet in that time he’d managed to “find” clothes and other necessities for Shi Qingxuan…all without ever spending this pearl.

Deciding it must have sentimental value, Shi Qingxuan carefully stowed it back into the pouch and bargained for what he could get with the coins, hurrying back as fas as he could with an armful of food and medicine.

“A-Xuan! A-Xuan, I’m back,” Shi Qingxuan, settling down next to him. “I brought you food, I didn’t know what you wanted, but…A-Xuan? Are you awake?”

Nervously, Shi Qingxuan reached out to brush sweat-soaked hair from He Xuan’s forehead and feel his temperature—

Shi Qingxuan panicked, hand jerking back from He Xuan’s burning forehead. He didn’t know what to do; when he’d left, although in pain, He Xuan was at least awake. But now he was completely unresponsive—the food and medicine he’d counted on helping were useless if he couldn’t ingest them. If only Shi Qingxuan had spiritual power to heal him or money for a doctor—he didn’t even have a healthy body to try to pack him to Xie Lian to get help!

Frantic, Shi Qingxuan touched him again, praying he’d been mistaken—

He Xuan was searing hot yet still so pale—shouldn’t he be flushed with fever, not white as a sheet? And his breathing was so shallow that his chest was barely moving…

Shi Qingxuan stared. No…no, he wasn’t moving at all!

Urgently, Shi Qingxuan felt for a pulse in He Xuan’s wrist but his hand was shaking in fear and he couldn’t find it. So he shoved the blanket aside and pressed his ear to He Xuan’s chest…

And there was no heartbeat.

That couldn’t be right! Maybe Shi Qingxuan was just out of his mind with worry and couldn’t hear, that had to be it. He pressed his trembling fingers to the pulse point in He Xuan’s neck and…nothing.

Shi Qingxuan scrubbed at his face, now wasn’t the time for tears! What to do? What to do?

Oh god, what do I do?!

Perhaps it was the “oh god” that jogged his memory but all of a sudden he recalled Crimson Rain Sought Flower infusing His Highness with spiritual power. And it worked when resuscitating drowning victims too, right? Ah, it was so simple! He just needed to kiss the life back into him—

Self-consciously, Shi Qingxuan licked his lips…then immediately wiped his mouth out of consideration. Carefully but confidently, mentally chanting, “It’s just spiritual power, it’s just spiritual power” over and over in his head, Shi Qingxuan lowered his head and pressed his lips to He Xuan’s.

His lips are the only thing on him not burning up, was Shi Qingxuan’s first thought.

They’re wonderful, was the second.

Now Shi Qingxuan, obviously, did not have spiritual power.

And He Xuan, obviously, was already a ghost and therefore wasn’t dead(er).

Yet Shi Qingxuan’s kiss snapped He Xuan back to life all the same, his long eyelashes fluttering for a second before his eyelids snapped wide open.

The movement caught Shi Qingxuan’s attention and he pulled away.

“It worked!” Shi Qingxuan laughed gratefully, tears leaving muddy streaks on his face. “It worked! Wait...” Logic finally very belatedly caught up to him. “Why did that work? Nevermind, it’s not important—A-Xuan, can you hear me? Are you alright?”

Never having experienced or expected such a thing in his life, He Xuan just stared back blankly and Shi Qingxuan pressed his ear to He Xuan’s chest. It took He Xuan a moment to put it all together and realize what Shi Qingxuan was listening for, so he quickly manufactured a heartbeat.

“Thank god,” Shi Qingxuan breathed, so relieved all he could do was rest against He Xuan’s chest for a moment, smiling at the reassuring sound. “I was so worried about you. You can’t die, okay? Promise me you won’t.”

I’m already dead, you idiot, He Xuan thought.

“I won’t,” he said instead, giving Shi Qingxuan’s head a little pat, his thumb brushing over a tear-stained cheek and coming away wet.

The hunger had passed but overwhelming fatigue took over, pulling him under once more. He didn’t have time to say or do anything before exhaustion took him, his hand still resting limply on Shi Qingxuan’s hair.

“A-Xuan?” Shi Qingxuan asked nervously, pressing his ear to He Xuan’s chest once again. The heartbeat was very slow but it was there.

In the nothingness, that fuzzy blackness that enveloped his consciousness, He Xuan could vaguely hear something soft and sad, somehow reaching him despite sounding so far away…

“A-Xuan, I…I’m sorry,” Shi Qingxuan whispered, fresh tears rolling down his cheeks. “I know it’s wrong, it’s unforgivable, and you hate him for what he did—us, hate us for what we did. But, A-Xuan? I realize now I would’ve done it too. Just now, I was so afraid…. Anything. I was so afraid of losing you, no matter how awful or wrong, I would’ve done anything to save you.”

Shi Qingxuan fell asleep on He Xuan’s chest, listening to the sound of that heart that beat just for him.

When he woke, He Xuan was nowhere to be found. Instead, left in his place was the beautiful, pristine, and perfectly intact Wind Master Fan.

Epilogue

The second Shi Qingxuan picked up the Wind Master fan, he could feel the spiritual power thrumming, just like when he’d used it in the capital. This time, too, it likely only had one good use before it fell apart again.

Shi Qingxuan waved his fan, flinging himself into the sky.

He Xuan knew he had to get away but he hadn’t gone all that far—where did he even have to go? “His” palace had burned up, he’d abandoned his lair…there was no place for him to return to, no place he needed to be.

No place he wanted to be.

As soon as the thought crossed his mind he heard a sound—a voice, calling him, but it couldn’t be here, it was impossible—

“He-gongzi! He-gongzi!” There was a pause as the person took a deep breath, shouting as loudly as he could, “HE XUANNNNN!”

He Xuan looked up just in time to see Shi Qingxuan quite literally falling out of the sky, grinning from ear to ear.

“Are you insane?” He Xuan yelled, catching the falling maniac. “Do you want to die?! Breaking your arm and leg wasn’t enough for you, now you want to fall out of the fucking sky and break your idiot neck too?”

Shi Qingxuan just laughed, hugging He Xuan around the neck with his one good arm. “I knew you’d catch me!”

“How? What if I hadn’t? What if I’d truly disappeared and you just plummeted to your death from irrationally flinging yourself into the air like an idiot—”

“I’ve been waiting years to call you by the right name,” Shi Qingxuan interrupted, eyes sparkling. “He Xuan.”

Everything went quiet and He Xuan’s entire body went numb; even the arms still holding Shi Qingxuan felt like they belonged to someone else, they couldn’t possibly be attached to him.

“I wanted to call you by the right name this time. After…after, I thought over and over about what you said. In that place and…” Shi Qingxuan trailed off with a little sigh, tears in the corners of his eyes.

Of course they both remembered it, clear as day: “You called for the wrong person.”

“I’ve spent so much time since just wondering, if I had called you the right name then, if things would have turned out differently.”

“No,” He Xuan said firmly.

Shi Qingxuan’s head shot up, thinking He Xuan was answering his longtime question. But that wasn’t it at all—He Xuan had ignored his question completely and gone straight to denial.

“No, you can’t do this,” He Xuan insisted. “Whatever it is you’re thinking in that empty head of yours, you’re wrong. You’re wrong! It—it wouldn’t…wouldn’t have made a difference, I just said that…”

Centuries of being an immaculate actor and yet his lies were so transparent now.

“Leave!” He Xuan demanded, completely ignoring the fact he still held Shi Qingxuan quite securely in his arms. “Go. This is nonsense. I’m leaving.”

“Then I’ll go with you,” Shi Qingxuan blurted. “I…when I lost my divinity, I told ge—I mean, I said that I wanted to just leave and be a wandering vagabond. Let’s go. Take me with you.”

“Have you lost your fucking mind?” He Xuan roared. “You called me by name, you know who I am!”

“I do know who you are, that’s why I want to stay with you—”

“You’re terrified of me! You woke up, absolutely terrified from a nightmare, begging me to promise that ‘he wasn’t here’ and that ‘he’ couldn’t hurt you! Who else would that have been but me?!”

Shi Qingxuan frowned for a second, then realization dawned on his face.

“Oh, don’t flatter yourself! That nightmare wasn’t about you at all!” Shi Qingxuan scoffed, stunning He Xuan. “I dreamed back to when I was ten and the Reverend of Empty Words found me. It was dark and scary and I was already about to pee my pants—of course I’d be terrified!”

Still, He Xuan refused to be swayed, face grim as he transformed from “A-Xuan” into his real self, waiting for the slightest hint of terror on Shi Qingxuan’s face as he became Black Water Demon Xuan before his eyes.

“Regardless, you should be scared of me,” He Xuan said, his voice a little deeper now in his true, more mature form. “You can’t have forgotten what I’ve done.”

“I will never forget,” Shi Qingxuan said simply, without a drop of malice or fear. “But I know you—”

“No, you don’t. You don’t know anything. That-—that cruel demon out for revenge—was the real me. The one you thought you knew doesn’t exist. Never existed.”

“I thought that at first,” Shi Qingxuan admitted. “I almost convinced myself that was the case. But after being around you again, like this, you were just like I remembered…”

“I am not Ming Yi!” He Xuan interrupted, for some reason uncontrollably furious. “You—listen to me! You are in love with a character, not me!”

“I know you think I’m dumb but I’m not that dumb!” Shi Qingxuan yelled back. “No—no, wait—you’re dumb!”

“Hah?” He Xuan was incredulous.

“No matter whether you’re Ming-xiong or A-Xuan, you do the same things. Because the real you keeps coming through whether you realize it or not! You have the same snotty attitude, the same little huff and eyeroll, the way you blush a little and pretend not to like me but you do!”

“Like you?” He Xuan scoffed.

“See!” Shi Qingxuan pointed at him. “That scoff! It’s the same no matter who you are! Don’t say I don’t know you and that it’s all an act!”

“It’s an act,” He Xuan insisted.

“Then let me ask one thing,” Shi Qingxuan said. “If you can answer this one question, I’ll believe it was an act, I’ll believe you’re a monster, I’ll be afraid of you and leave you alone, okay? Back then, you…you screamed at me, you were so livid—you said: ‘I gave you so many chances.’ I’ve forgotten some things about that day, which might be for the better, but I’ve never once forgotten that—”

“Don’t,” He Xuan warned.

“Why?” Shi Qingxuan asked, eyes bright and clear as he stared at He Xuan, a tiny smile on his lips despite talking about the most painful day of his life. “He Xuan, why did you give me so many chances?”

He Xuan couldn’t bear it; he closed his eyes and whispered, “Hate me. You should hate me. Why don’t you hate me—”

“He Xuan,” Shi Qingxuan said, one hand on He Xuan’s face.

“You’re wrong; I don’t like you, I hate you. I hate you, you took everything from me. I hate you,” He Xuan repeated, almost desperately, his eyes still closed. “I hate you—”

“Fine,” Shi Qingxuan said, his concession causing He Xuan to open his eyes. “You took everything from me too. So I hate you too, with all my heart.”

With that, Shi Qingxuan kissed him.

He Xuan had wanted to push him away—so why was he holding him closer and kissing him back?

“What are you doing?” He Xuan growled into Shi Qingxuan’s mouth, his mind still trying to argue with Shi Qingxuan despite his body’s own refusal to let him go.

Shi Qingxuan smiled against his lips; that anger wasn’t very convincing when he kissed so passionately. “You hate me so bad there’s nothing in this world you hate more than me, so kissing me must be hell for you,” Shi Qingxuan explained in the little breaths between kisses. “So this is my revenge.”

Thanks to the dramatic infusion of spiritual power, Shi Qingxuan was able to twine both arms around He Xuan’s neck.

“You can hate me all you want, but just please don’t leave.”

After a bit of tumbling in the grass and making out to their momentary satisfaction, He Xuan shook his head, frowning in shock and disbelief.

“You can’t want this, this is insane,” he tried, mumbling to himself with Shi Qingxuan still happily in his lap.

Shi Qingxuan was a master of ignoring what he didn’t want to hear so he naturally paid it no mind.

“You know, I was thinking, well. Since I got your fate, the life you were supposed to have, what if…what if we just kind of split the difference and shared what’s left from here on out?”

He Xuan looked at him (perhaps rightfully) like he’d lost his fucking mind. “…What.”

“I’m just saying,” Shi Qingxuan said, trying to act cool. “Maybe the only way to fix this is to be together. Take our swapped and twisted fates and kinda…combine them.”

“That makes absolutely no sense.”

“I think it makes a lot of sense. I think it’s brilliant.”

“You’re wrong on both counts. That is utterly idiotic, it’s pointless and would never work, it’s absurd—”

“Listen, at this point the only thing we have left is each other. So we have nothing to lose.”

He Xuan frowned skeptically as he considered that for a moment. “When you say it like that it sounds like we’re both worthless. We have nothing left to lose because the only thing we have is each other..?”

“No no no,” Shi Qingxuan assured him. “It’s super romantic, trust me.”

“I’m pretty sure it’s not—”

“Well if you think I’m talking nonsense then you could just kiss me again—”

“I didn’t kiss you in the first place, you kissed me,” He Xuan argued.

Struck by a sudden thought, Shi Qingxuan burst out giggling. “If he could hear us now, my brother would be rolling in his grave.”

Then a terrifying thought occurred to both of them at the same time and they stared at each other.

“Do you think he coul—?” Shi Qingxuan began in a whisper, as if Shi Wudu really was listening in.

“Don’t say it!” He Xuan snapped. “Don’t you dare say it!”

Pressing together his maybe slightly kiss-swollen lips, Shi Qingxuan fought a smile. Who knew there was something even the eater of the Reverend of Empty Words was too afraid to hear?

Which was why Shi Qingxuan couldn’t not say it:

“Could ge actually become a ghos—?”

“I said don’t even say it!” He Xuan slapped his hand over Shi Qingxuan’s mouth, unable to stifle the giggles beneath.

“He-gongzi, He-xiong, my beloved A-Xuan~ you should know that if you’re trying to shut me up you need something way better than that,” Shi Qingxuan said, only half-muffled beneath He Xuan’s palm.

Totally Unnecessary Epilogue

“So yeah,” Shi Qingxuan chattered to Xie Lian, “I might not be around for a while and I knew you’d worry, so I thought I’d stop by and let you know.”

“That’s thoughtful of you,” Xie Lian said slowly, looking at Shi Qingxuan’s legs lightly swinging—both of them—as he sat in the shabby chair at Xie Lian’s table. “If it’s not too rude to ask, where are you going?”

“Wherever we want,” Shi Qingxuan said happily. “We’ve got no place we have to be so why not just wander around for a bit and see where we end up? Who knows, maybe when we get tired of the vagabond life we can find a cute little place and open an inn or something. But we’re both completely broke—do you think your Crimson Rain Sought Flower would loan us the money to start up?”

Xie Lian laughed awkwardly; from what he’d gathered, Black Water had already accumulated a massive debt. Would San Lang really be willing to loan him any more?

Still, it warmed Xie Lian’s heart to see the former Wind Master so happy.

“Maybe,” Xie Lian said with a small smile.

“Put in a good word for us,” Shi Qingxuan said. “It’s a great investment opportunity, I promise!” He stretched his neck to peek out the window; apparently not seeing what he was looking for he sighed, elbows on the table and chin in his hands. “What’s taking A-Xuan so long,” he mumbled, pout on his lips.

Xie Lian blinked in surprised at the name. He still remembered the bone-chilling tone as Black Water said, “You called for the wrong person.” It somehow felt like ages ago yet like yesterday all at the same time; did Black Water really not mind being addressed that way?

“You still call him A-Xuan?” Xie Lian asked tentatively.

Though Shi Qingxuan could be a little silly and a lot oblivious on occasion, he wasn’t actually stupid and knew in only a second what Xie Lian really meant by the question.

“Of course,” Shi Qingxuan said. “What, am I supposed to go around calling him ‘Supreme Ghost King Ship-Sinking Black Water’ or ‘Black Water Demon Xuan’ all the time? I know I’m eloquent but even I’d get tongue-tied saying that all day!”

Xie Lian smiled, a bit pained. “No, I meant…”

Shi Qingxuan grinned. “I know, I know, I’m just playing. We never really talked about it but, you know, he’s pretty smart. I think he realized that ‘A-Xuan’…that wasn’t the name for his character, that was my name for him the whole time.”

“Ahh.” Xie Lian nodded, relieved. Then he huffed a little laugh at himself.

“What’s so funny?”

“Oh, I was going to ask if this was really what you wanted, but I realized that’s not necessary. The answer seems pretty obvious.” Then he hurried to add, “Not that it’s any of my business anyway. You’re plenty capable of making your own decisions—”

“I know you’re just looking out for me,” Shi Qingxuan assured him. “And to answer your question…yes, it may seem weird and even I have days where I wonder if this is ‘right’ or ‘okay.’ But…” He smiled at Xie Lian, his bright eyes glittering like merry stars. “Good or bad, right or wrong, I’m happy with him. And I think I could be happy anywhere as long as he’s there.”

Though reassured, Xie Lian couldn’t help but blush a little in awe of Shi Qingxuan’s confidence. To say something like that so boldly, without the slightest hint of embarrassment was actually pretty amazing.

“Well then, if you’re sure…” Xie Lian coughed into his fist, clearing his throat. “I have a bit of practical advice, if I may?”

“Of course!” Shi Qingxuan said, giving Xie Lian a friendly pat on the shoulder. “We’re friends, aren’t we? No need to be so formal or hold back!”

“Please be wary and careful when you encounter others in your travels,” Xie Lian said. “Especially monks and cultivators. There’s one in particular known as Heaven’s Eye who can see ghost qi—I don’t know how many others out there have cultivated the same skill, but it’s best to avoid him and remain skeptical of others just in case—”

Shi Qingxuan laughed. “Ghost qi? But I’m not a ghost, what do I have to worry about?”

You’re not a ghost but your lover is!

Xie Lian didn’t know whether to laugh or cry; he really didn’t how to explain this tactfully.

Then again, Black Water was of the same caliber as Hua Cheng—maybe it was silly to worry? Could Heaven’s Eye and the like really give either of them much trouble?

But still, even if Heaven’s Eye was no match for a Supreme, Shi Qingxuan was mortal…full of ghost qi or not. So if he happened to be alone and ran into Heaven’s Eye or someone with a similar ability, who knows what might happen.

“I know you aren’t a ghost,” Xie Lian said patiently. “But that doesn’t mean you aren’t, um…perhaps…saturated with ghost qi that could attract unwanted attention.”

“Ha haha, Your Highness, you’re so funny,” Shi Qingxuan said, glancing away and refusing to make eye contact. “I have no idea what you’re talking about—‘saturated’? I mean, haha, why does that…why does that word sound so lewd? It really gives the wrong idea—”

“Ahem,” Xie Lian interrupted. When Shi Qingxuan dared glance over, Xie Lian looked pointedly at the healthy leg tapping a suddenly nervous rhythm on the floor of the shrine. Then he looked at Shi Qingxuan’s healed arm, nimble fingers twirling a lock of luxurious black hair.

Finally, Xie Lian stared straight at him and tapped his own lips. He tried raising a skeptical eyebrow, a trick he’d learned from Hua Cheng.

“Ah..haha ha…” Shi Qingxuan laughed awkwardly. His hand flew to his mouth, fingertips against lips that just might be a little swollen and redder than usual—he was totally busted.

“I’ll be careful,” Shi Qingxuan muttered, his face a little hot.

Meanwhile, He Xuan was in Ghost City finalizing some business with Hua Cheng.

“Anything else?” Hua Cheng asked, putting away a few papers (fortunately in He Xuan’s handwriting so they were actually legible).

“No that’s…” He Xuan trailed off thoughtfully. “Although…”

Hua Cheng didn’t care for guessing games and was in a hurry to spend less time with Black Water and more time with Xie Lian. “Just spit it out.”

He Xuan frowned, his brows pinched in concern. “Do you know…have you ever heard of a ghost being haunted by another ghost?”

Hua Cheng arched a perfect eyebrow.

“After becoming Supreme, have you ever been haunted by another ghost?” He Xuan clarified.

“Of course not,” Hua Cheng snorted.

“Is it possible, though?” He Xuan pressed, suddenly really wanting an answer. “Do you think?”

“You’re being haunted?” Hua Cheng asked skeptically. “You?”

“Not…yet,” He Xuan said slowly. “Not ever, I hope,” he hurried to add. Then he shook his head as if trying to talk himself out of thinking about such nonsense. “I don’t even know if he can turn into a ghost—but if a ghost can ascend as a god, can’t a god return as a ghost? And knowing that stubborn, resentful old bastard and how grossly overprotective he is of his little brother…”

That was enough for Hua Cheng to put it all together and he burst out laughing, not bothering to give He Xuan an answer.