Archive of Our Own

Chan has no intentions of joining the X-Men. Like seriously, the yellow would absolutely ruin his current aesthetic. Could you imagine switching up on that now? His whole reputation would be for nothing if people didn't recognize him and he's worked hard on that reputation.

Besides the X-Men had their whole no killing rule because to be a hero you needed to turn the other cheek and offer kindness, or whatever holier than thou bullshit the Professor liked to spew. While Chan sort of sees where he's coming from with that kind of thinking, he's just not that kind of guy. (Chan knows that not everyone on the team is completely clean, for starters he's seen the files on Felix.) If anything he's far better suited for the Brotherhood, hell, he's practically a member. Or was, at least; he's not sure where he stands with them at the moment. He's positive that Seungmin has it out for him, partly because he refuses to call him by his code-name and mostly because he kept calling him adorable to his face, which Seungmin did not like one bit. But Chan couldn't help it, Seungmin was adorable. His determination and righteousness and murderous intent was very cute to Chan. And now that he thinks about it, he probably thought Chan was making fun of him.

Huh. 

That's making a lot of things make sense now.

Anyways, that's besides the point, Chan isn't cut out to be an X-Men. No matter what anybody says about his potential, he's not going to change his ways to be part of their silly little team. And even if he did want to be part of the team, it'd never work out.

"So, how's the kid?"

Felix startles from where he was clearly busy doing whatever it is he does here at the mansion. Is he a teacher? He must be, because he found him in one of the millions of classrooms and it looks like he's grading papers. He's glaring at Chan.

"Well?"

"You know you can ask to see him for yourself," Felix says, sighing heavily; he shuffles the papers into a stack. "You don't have to slink around the school like a weirdo."

Chan shrugs, shoving his hands into the pockets of his hoodie, "I don't think it's a good idea for me to see him."

There's no response. Chan's staring at the poster hanging on the back wall, right on the wood paneling and the letters in bright blue: Kindness Is Key. He turns to find Felix staring at him with those sparkly eyes of his, far kinder than Chan deserves.

"He misses you," Felix finally says. "He'll want to see you."

That twists in Chan's chest. He shifts uncomfortably, he doesn't know how he feels about that. It just doesn't make sense for Jisung to miss Chan; not when he spent the better part of the few months they'd known each other trying to get rid of him. That kid was persistent though. Even so, the worst part was that Chan was responsible for him being recaptured by Stryker in the end.

Jisung was better off here, with the X-Men and staff and kids who understood what being different is like.

He's Felix's clone for God's sake, why would he want anything to do with Chan when the Wolverine was right there?

"He's just a kid," Chan says, shaking his head, "He doesn't know any better."

Felix rolls his eyes, jaw tightening, as if he found Chan's words highly offensive. "He knows enough to still want you around. What are you afraid of?"

The accusation sits heavy, an anchor around Chan's neck pulling him down. He's trying to do the right thing here for once by keeping his distance before he can cause more damage. Because Jisung deserves a stable environment and good influences, that's what he'll get here. And as much as Jisung thinks he likes Chan, he'd eventually see right through Chan and realize he's not even worth knowing. At least, this way he's saving Jisung from that grief. He can leave him with good memories, well, mostly good memories. 

"I thought you'd be happy that I'm keeping my distance," he argues, "It's better this way."

"Better for who? Him or you?" Felix asks, and it's such a simple question, but it feels like Felix took out his claws and sliced right into his chest. He raises a brow, clearly challenging Chan to consider it. 

Chan does not want to know what Felix is thinking because whatever he thinks is wrong. 

"That sweater looks ridiculous," Chan says instead, gesturing to it. The red sweater vest has white and black hearts on it, there's fraying threads hanging off of it. It must be intentional but it looks like Felix got dressed with his claws out and messed with the sweater's structural integrity. "It's not even Valentine's Day."

"Chan," Felix says, low and careful, it's the way one would try to comfort a feral animal. 

"I'm sorry, it's true," Chan continues, "It's basically falling apart not even you can make that style look good."

Felix opens his mouth, there's a hard look in his eye, annoyance and something else. Chan would usually relish in annoying the Wolverine but not right now, not when it seems like Felix is insistent on needling Chan into voicing his feelings.

But whatever Felix was about to say is lost to the alarm ringing through the building. Chan knows what that noise means. 

"Well, hate to cut this short, but it seems that you're needed elsewhere!" Chan says, pasting on a bright grin and gesturing at him. "Better get suited up, big guy! Have fun!"

Felix rolls his eyes, "We're not done here," he says, already out of his seat and making his way past Chan towards the doors. "You should—"

"Bye Felix!"

Chan wakes up with a pounding headache. He stretches out, only to realize that he is still regenerating his hand from the night before. He's electing to go back to sleep, hopefully he'll be good as new when he wakes again. But he's stopped when he hears pounding on his door belatedly realizing that must be what woke him up, he glares at the ceiling and groans, burying his face into the blankets.

Fuck, what does a guy need to do to get some sleep?

He throws his blankets off of him, stomping towards the door. He swears to God if it's his neighbors he will scream, it's like they don't understand how to keep an eye on their dog. Chan is not responsible for their dog escaping every five minutes. Not including the time he did sort of steal her because, well, he's only human and she looked so cute and stared at him with her big puppy eyes like she knew he was about to eat a delicious meal. So, sue him. He took her in and fed her some of the chicken he ordered. 

"Give me a minute!"

The knocking continues and Chan doesn't know what time it is but it's far too early for this. 

He practically rips the door open, his complaints dying in his throat when he sees Jisung standing there, hand raised to knock and eyes wide. It takes a split second before he smiles. 

"Hi, Chan," he says, his hands moving up to the straps of his backpack, shifting on his feet and eyes darting around. 

Chan's frozen in place momentarily, before he jumps into gear stepping aside to let him in. "Um, what're you doing here?" he asks, when Jisung bounces past him, beelining straight for the couch, his bag tossed onto the floor.

"Your place still looks like shit," Jisung comments, wasting no time making himself comfortable. 

Chan sighs heavily. He wonders what makes Jisung so set on being a thorn in Chan's side, returning each time he tries to remove him. Sure, he saved the kid, twice now, but that can't be enough to make him want to stick around. Frankly, he's afraid to ask.

"Does Felix know you're here?"

Jisung snorts. "Why would he?"

"So, he doesn't know?"

Jisung doesn't answer.

"Right," Chan says, shifting his weight, "What about Changbin, does he know you're here? Or the Professor? Or anybody?"

"The taxi driver that drove me here does," Jisung answers, leaning back into the couch, so nonchalantly.

Chan groans, walking towards his room to make a phone call and to change, once he's changed he grabs his phone and dials up Minho's number.

"Is Jisung okay?" Minho asks as soon as he answers, not even giving Chan a chance to speak.

Chan sighs, of course, he knew and if he hadn't, he would've figured out where he was. "So, you knew."

Minho hums, it's basically a confirmation. 

"And you didn't think to give me a head's up? What kind of institution are you running?"

"It's a school for kids with powers," Minho drawls out. 

"That's no excuse!" Chan argues, mostly to annoy Minho, "Again, why are you letting your students travel hours away by themselves? I'm surprised the board of education isn't up your ass."

Minho scoffs, "Are you done? Or are you going to tell me how to run my school?"

Chan grins, he can basically see the annoyed look on Minho's face. "I wouldn't have to if you actually—"

"I don't want to hear it," Minho cuts him off. "And as long as Jisung's okay, I don't see the problem."

Chan clicks his tongue, rubbing a hand over his face, "I'll get him home."

"Chan—"

"ASAP," Chan answers, "Try not to lose any other kids while you're at it."

Minho sighs heavily, like he's regretting even answering in the first place.

"Bye, Professor, love you!" he says, sing-song tone, giggling at the way Minho makes a noise over the line before abruptly hanging up.

When he leaves his room, he finds Jisung comfortably lounging on his sofa. The TV playing some anime that he doesn't recognize. 

"How'd the call with the Professor go?" Jisung asks, not even glancing away from the screen, it doesn't surprise him since Jisung does have heightened senses. He'd obviously heard all of it. "Are you going to make me leave now?"

And something about the way he asks is slightly heartbreaking. 

Chan sighs, shutting his eyes and turning towards the kitchen. "Have you eaten?" he asks instead, opening his fridge, only to remember he hasn't bought any groceries in a very long time. There's some beer that his neighbors bought as a welcome to the building gift, nearly two years ago. Chan hated the beer, but never bothered to toss them; there's some rotting veggies in the drawer. Leftovers from Mrs. Kim from across the hall because she seems to know that Chan doesn't eat well enough on his own. Some old takeout and a weird looking liquid thing that he stole from a lab that he never figured out what it does and has probably made his fridge a contamination zone.

He shuts the fridge, not even bothering with the freezer since everything in there probably has freezer burn, and the cabinets are just as sad and barren.

He sighs, hands on his hips as he considers his options. "Alright, let's go out somewhere to eat," he announces.

Jisung's cheeks are full of food, shoveling it down like he hasn't eaten in days, but Chan knows better. He knows there's no way they aren't feeding him at the mansion, it's likely a habit that he's had from before. It reminds him of when they'd first met, how much Jisung ate, it made Chan think he was going to be sick. He thinks the same now. 

But Chan is glad that he's eating without worry though. 

Jisung looks up, tilting his head as he watches Chan, he's just now realizing that Chan isn't eating. "Eat," he says, the word comes out like a demand, but it's hard to take him seriously with how round his cheeks are from food and the slight pout on his face. 

It's insane to think that they had Jisung running around the world killing people. It's less insane that he managed to do so, Chan thinks most people saw the adorable face and the fact that he was only a kid and figured he was no threat at all. What a fucking mistake for those guys. 

Chan smiles, "I'm fine."

Jisung shakes his head, brows furrowing. "Eat," he demands, raising his fist like he's about to have his claws out to show how serious his threat is, before remembering that using his powers in public is frowned upon. He lowers it and instead stares him down. "You should eat."

Chan can't help the smile that makes its way onto his face. He remembers the first time they were in this position, Jisung hadn't cared if Chan ate, only that he had food.

"Okay," Chan says, sitting forward. Jisung chews slowly and watches Chan like a hawk to make sure he's eating. It's not until after Chan has picked up his chopsticks and taken a few bites that Jisung nods. He relaxes and begins digging back into his own bowl.

"Um, how's school?" Chan asks, hearing how awkward it sounds to his own ears; he feels like a distant relative or estranged father that has no idea how to make small talk. 

Jisung must be thinking the same because he's got a look full of all the scathing judgement a teenager can manage. 

"Kid, seriously, you've gotta give me something," Chan says, "Why'd you run away? Is somebody bothering you?"

Jisung snorts, the look being replace with a more amused one. "You think I'd get bullied?"

"Well, yeah," Chan concedes. He does believe anybody could get bullied, Jisung included with his odd behaviors and lack of social awareness. It's not his fault he'd never been able to be around others, but he knows Jisung's not the kind to back down without a fight. If anything he's likely picking fights with others. "Then what's wrong?"

Jisung shrugs. "Nothing."

Chan nods slowly, he isn't sure how to deal with this, or how to get Jisung to open up to him. "What do they even teach at that school?"

"Usual school stuff," Jisung answers, frowning, "At least I think it's usual. I'm not an expert on normal."

"Yeah, I don't think any of us are," Chan jokes trying to be light-hearted. Except he can't remember a time when his own life was normal, or if it ever was, he knows at some point it had been but it feels like so long ago. And Chan feels awful that Jisung has no idea what normal should be. That he's never had a normal experience from the moment he was born. Chan wishes he'd killed Stryker and everyone involved in doing this to Jisung sooner.

"There's classes and activities, it's actually kind of fun," Jisung continues, blissfully unaware of the turmoil that Chan's going through. "Changbin's teaching me how to build stuff." 

"I'm glad you're having fun there," Chan says, nodding. "What's he teaching you to build?"

Jisung perks up, smiling as he delves into an explanation of how Changbin started teaching him how to fix the radio that Jisung had broken and upgraded it to include Bluetooth. (He doesn't seem to appreciate Chan saying that he can teach him how to fix things too.) Apparently, they've moved to more complicated machinery.

"He was going to show me how to fix cars, but it's parent's weekend."

The words sound like a siren in his head, causing him to make a face as he sits up straight. "It's parent weekend?"

Jisung freezes, eyes downcast. "Yeah," he answers, it sounds off to Chan's ears. 

It suddenly makes sense why Jisung left. He knows that it must be hard to see all the other kids with their families and having to watch, knowing you don't have anyone to show up for you. Sure, there's Felix, but as a teacher he's likely running around putting out fires and helping everyone.

"Is that why you're here?"

Jisung looks uncomfortable. "It's not a big deal."

"What about Felix?"

That is the wrong thing to say because Jisung's lips purse, eyes shifting, "He's not my dad."

"Well," Chan starts, making a face, "You have his DNA running through you. You're his kid."

"A clone," Jisung says, there's a bitter edge to his tone. 

"Okay, well, I'm not your dad either," Chan answers, trying to do his best to avoid that loook turning to anger. "Why'd you come to me?"

If bringing up Felix was the wrong thing to say, then this was definitely the worst thing he could say.

"I don't think that," Jisung argues, clearly upset. The chopsticks in his hand crack. "I just... figured you were lonely too."

"I'm not lonely," Chan says, laughing, though he knows that it's a pretty accurate descriptor. He just hates that he's being called out on it. Besides Chan chooses to be alone, he's always been better on his own.

Jisung snorts, raising a brow, "Yeah. Could've fooled me."

He certainly has some nerve. There's no way for Chan to convince him that he's wrong, he thinks Chan's full of shit.

"Besides, I know you visited," Jisung says, carefully; looking at Chan like he's expecting him to deny it. And Chan opens his mouth to do just that. "Jeongin told me. Why didn't you..." he cuts himself off, shaking his head as if he's afraid to voice the question.

It's a simple question, it has a simple answer, but Chan knows that answer is not going to be something that Jisung wants to hear. He stays quiet and that seems to be enough of an answer. 

"This was stupid," Jisung says, shaking his head, "Take me home."

The drive back to the school is long and Jisung is quiet the whole way. He'd fiddled with the radio until he found something he liked, dozing off as he watched out the window.

As much as Chan tried to get Jisung back to his usual chatterbox self, it seems the damage is done. He tries to make jokes to cheer him up but Jisung only glares at him and repeats that he wants to go home.

Jisung seems to know when they're near the school's property line, immediately sitting up and rubbing away the sleep from his eyes. 

When Chan pulls the car through the entrance gate he notices the kids roaming around on the grass. And as he drives closer to the front of the school he spots two figures sitting on the front steps as if they knew they'd be arriving. It's Felix, his blond hair blowing in the wind, sitting up as they come to a stop at the entrance, he recognizes Jeongin beside him.

He shuts the car off. Jeongin stands up immediately, but Felix stays sitting, Jisung seems a bit happier at seeing them but hesitates getting out. 

"Are you going to stay for a while?" Jisung asks, voice quieter than usual. 

"Sorry, kid. I've got to get back to the city," he lies, there's no reason to head back just yet, he just knows he shouldn't stay. He can't let Jisung get more attached than he already is and it's clear that he's going to get the wrong idea if he does stay. 

Besides Chan's on thin ice with Minho. He won't be able to stay long because he'll inevitably annoy Minho, on purpose because he thinks it's amusing to push his buttons but he knows one of these days it won't just be Minho's usual annoyance but instead Minho will make good on his hollow threats and murder him, or do something drastic like mind control him into thinking he's a mime, or a cat, or something that's going to be equally humiliating. He wouldn't put it past Minho.

He doesn't trust himself not to push Minho too far just to see what'll happen. 

"Oh," Jisung says, "Will you visit?"

Chan sighs, shutting his eyes, he considers lying and dealing with his disappointment at another time. But he's not that much of an asshole, he won't give him false hope.

"No," he says, looking over at Jisung, regretting it immediately when he sees the disappointment written all over his face. Chan feels an ache bloom in his chest, but he knows it's better to get it over with now. 

"Well," Jisung says, now avoiding eye contact, "Could I visit you?"

"Jisung," Chan says, sighing heavily. He feels bad, but he knows this is the right thing to do. "It's better for me to stay out of your life."

Jisung scoffs, "Says who?"

Chan rolls his eyes as Jisung stares at him intensely. He knows Jisung is never one to back down, he should've known this conversation wouldn't be easy. His jaw tightens as he grips the steering wheel. "I do," he answers evenly, Jisung looks ready to argue more, so Chan says the thing he didn't want to have to say: "Jisung, I don't want you hanging around me. Just leave me the fuck alone already, yeah?"

Jisung flinches as if the words had physically slapped him. He looks like a wounded puppy, wide eyes and a pout, and Chan feels more like a monster now than he ever has when he's massacred people. 

He's tempted to take back the words and apologize but he doesn't. 

"Got it." Jisung huffs, his eyes watery, and immediately opens the door without another word. He slams the door hard enough to cause the glass of the window to shake. 

He watches as Jisung rushes away from the car and past a clearly worried Felix. He quickly disappears through the doors. Chan notices Jeongin start to follow before stopping, he turns around and stares at Chan, before he knows it his own hand is moving without his permission punching himself in the face. 

He groans at the impact and sees Jeongin rushing away.  "Okay, I deserve that," he admits, although Jeongin already knows that. He rubs over his jaw where Jeongin made him hit himself. He thinks that it's clear this school is just creating the next generation of menaces. 

Chan notices Felix coming closer and locks the doors immediately, smiling sheepishly when Felix attempts to open the door.

"Chan, open the door!"

"Sorry, can't hear you!" Chan replies, turning the key in the ignition, the noise of the car roaring to life does not muffle Felix, "Gotta go!"

He drives away with a pissed off Felix in his rear-view. 

Chan's hiding behind a car as he's being shot at by some guys that work for the crime boss he'd been tracking, or perhaps it's the ones working for another shady government organization. He can't remember. It all blurs together when you decide to do multiple jobs in a row. He needed to keep busy and the money, so yeah, he's not entirely sure who's after him at this very moment. But he does know that a shoot out on a bridge with Chan is definitely noteworthy. 

Which is why he's not surprised when Changbin shows up. He's in all his powered up glory. The sun reflecting off his metallic biceps, making him shine brightly like a newly polished weight lifting trophy. Chan thinks he could do some real damage to someone's eyes if he turned a certain way. And right behind him is Jeongin, grinning as he waves at Chan like he's happy to see him, only for the words out of his mouth to be: "You're an asshole!" 

"I've been told," Chan replies, reloading his guns as he accepts that this team up is going to happen no matter what he has to say about it. "Also, hey, hi. What happened to polite greetings? Do they not teach you that at the X-Men Academy? I could've sworn Professor was a stickler for traditional ways and all that."

He's made one too many calls to Minho that ended with him immediately being hung up on because he didn't state his name properly, or even greet Minho before talking. Which is such a hypocritical move since Minho has called him a few times to immediately berate him without any greetings. The double standards of that man are truly astonishing.

Bullets bounce off Changbin as he turns away from Chan, looking towards the gunmen.

"Collossus, you should be ashamed, letting the kid talk like that when you're on babysitting duty," he's kneeling, looking over the car. He's ready to aim when an invisible force pushes the men all to the ground and suddenly their guns float through the air ending up far away from them. He sighs, standing up, "I had this under control, you know."

"Yeah, it really looked like it," Jeongin says.

"He's right you are an asshole," Changbin adds, scoffing. "All that talk about politeness, where's our thank you?"

Chan's walking out from his spot towards Changbin and the men. 

Jeongin makes a noise. "I can't keep them down for long."

"I've got it," Changbin says, Jeongin must let go since Chan sees them start to stir and immediately kicks the one he's closest to despite him looking more confused than anything. "Seriously?" 

"What? He moved!" Chan defends.

"He didn't," Jeongin argues, making his way over and handing Changbin cuffs as they round up the men. "Cops should be here soon."

"Oh, well, that's my cue!" Chan says, offering a salute as he begins walking away from the scene. He finds himself frozen in place. 

"Yeah, you're not going anywhere," Changbin says, right as Chan feels like he's back in his body there's handcuffs around his wrist. Not normal ones either, the power dampening and impossible to get off. 

The sound of sirens come closing in and Changbin looks at Chan.

"I won't run!" Chan promises, in the most convincing voice he can muster, smiling even though Changbin won't see it.

"He's going to run," Jeongin answers, glaring when Chan thinks some not so friendly thoughts. "Also, he's thinking about cutting his hands off," he adds, face twisted in disgust.

"Snitch," Chan accuses.

"That's disgusting. Please don't," Changbin warns, his own metallic face twisted up in disgust as well. He looks over at Jeongin. "Keep an eye on him. I'll talk to the cops."

Jeongin nods, looking at Chan, there's no trace of his usual trademark smile. He looks annoyed. Changbin is quickly out of earshot.

"So—"

"No," Jeongin says immediately, arms crossed over his chest, a tight lipped smile on his face.

"You don't even know what I was going to say!"

"Yes. I did," Jeongin answers.

"Yep, I know," Chan replies, sighing as he leans against the roof of the nearest car. It's ridiculously annoying just like it is when dealing with Minho. Jeongin's glaring at him because of course he's still listening to Chan's inner monologue, further proving why he hates telepaths, they just can't mind their own business and are far too nosy for their own good. "Not you, Jeonginnie. You're one of the good ones, you're exceptional!"

He purposely put emphasis on the ex. He would've made an X out of his arms, if he weren't handcuffed. Instead he settles for reaching out and booping Jeongin's nose, he flinches back with a scrunched up face.

"And you're ex-hausting," Jeongin retorts, glancing behind him towards where Changbin is. 

Chan grins, "I've heard that before as well."

Jeongin's frowning when he looks at Chan as if he's pitying him for something. And Chan wonders what exactly he caught on to. Again, telepaths are annoying like that.

Once they're in the jet, the small one, which means they knew this wasn't a big deal as if Changbin bringing a trainee wasn't evidence enough of that fact. Chan really needs to put up more of a fight, or even reach out to Seungmin and figure out where to get one of those stupid metal helmets to stop telepaths from getting up in his head. 

"You think too loud," Jeongin tells him. 

"It's lonely back here," Chan says, mostly a joke, he's seated right behind the two of them at the control seats. 

Changbin snorts. "What happened to being a lone wolf?" 

"I am," he answers, because he is. He's far better on his own, no need to worry about having to pick up other people's slack and do everything for everyone. Jeongin snorts. Chan sighs, frowning down at the cuffs still on his hands, he's starting to feel a little sick since most of his powers are the only thing keeping him alive and healthy. 

He notices Jeongin looking worried now as he turns towards him. 

"So. How's Jisung doing?" 

"Don't act like you care," Changbin says, that usual patience and understanding he has for Chan seeming to disappear. It turns out the Tinman does have a heart and Jisung has wormed his way into it.

"I thought you'd be happy that I'm out of the kid's life," Chan says, scoffing. 

"That's not true," Changbin admits, sounding genuine.

Of course, Changbin says that. He's the first one that had said he believed Chan had goodness within him and the potential to be a real hero. But he knows that even Changbin's patience will wear thin, it always does considering how many arguments the two of them have had over the years, eventually it's going to snap completely with no repair. One day Changbin's going to realize what everyone does, which is that Chan is beyond saving.

Chan is all the bad qualities that they'll want Jisung to get rid of to become a X-Men.

He hears a seat-belt click, squinting open his eye to see Jeongin plopping down in the spot next to him.

"You really do believe your own bullshit," Jeongin says, looking sad as he stares at him.

Chan hums and isn't sure what to say, but once again, it's proving why telepaths are the worse. It's his thoughts and his feelings for himself to bear, nobody should be burdened with what he feels but him. Especially not some twelve year old ("I'm seventeen," Jeongin interrupts) with powers to invade his mind. It's his God given right to keep everything to himself, or bottle them up, if he so pleases. Thank you very much.

"Everyone thinks you're scary," Jeongin says, "But you're actually just very... Sad."

Chan laughs. "Thanks, I'm glad I'm living up to my potential."

Jeongin tilts his head like he's considering how to respond to that. "Jisung wouldn't want me to tell you this, but you really hurt him."

"He'll get over it, he's a strong kid," Chan says, it's the same thing he's been telling himself whenever he thinks about how much he hurt Jisung. Because he'll get over it eventually, one day he'll realize Chan not being around is for the better. "I'm doing him a favor."

"No, you're not. You're being a selfish asshole," Jeongin answers, somehow seeming wiser beyond his years and exactly like the petulant kid he is in one swoop. 

"Hey! Is that how you talk to your elders?" Chan asks, coughing slightly as he feels his body grows weak. "The lack of disrespect is appalling. Honestly, Changbin do you hear this kid? Is this what you're teaching your trainees? I'm sure the Professor would love to hear about this."

Jeongin sighs, shaking his head, "You're an idiot."

Chan's sitting in Minho's office, Changbin had let him out of the cuffs, so he's back in good shape. Although he was expecting to be dropped off in the box, or maybe in the mansion's dungeons. He doesn't care how much Minho denies it's existence, he knows that he must have some kind of prison down there. It only makes sense. 

He's fiddling with the random objects scattered across the desk as they wait.

"Would you stop that?" Changbin asks, he's been sitting in the office with him, to make sure he doesn't leave. He's taking the watchdog thing very seriously. 

Right now, he's in his human form, all the shiny metal gone, though he's still nothing but muscle.

And Chan's doing his best not to think about Jeongin and his annoying habit of calling out Chan's bullshit. He doesn't care what he has to say, he's being naive in thinking that Chan should be part of Jisung's life in order to cheer him up. 

"I'm not doing anything, Binnie."

Chan reaches out to mess with the miniature zen garden, grabbing the rake and making circles in the sand.

Changbin groans, "You're going to end up breaking something."

"Nuh-uh, I won't," Chan says, but he leans away from Minho's desk. "I'm surprised you're not being more talkative. You always have so much to say."

Changbin's jaw tightens, "Maybe I'm tired. You ever think of that?"

"Ah, yeah, I bet being a hero gets tiring," Chan says solemnly, nodding along as if it's of the utmost importance. "You need to start finding a balance."

"Don't you ever get tired?" Changbin asks, ignoring his statement and directing the focus back to Chan.

Chan shakes his head. "Nope!" he says, grinning, "I'm always ready to go."

"I meant tired of treating everything like a joke," Changbin says, finally stepping away from the wall he's been leaning on. He's obviously pissed off. "You're never serious about anything. And I'm tired of trying to give you millions of chances."

Chan scoffs, feeling annoyance crawl under his skin, "That's your mistake. I never asked you to give me any chances. Fuck, I never even asked you to trust me!"

"You didn't have to!" Changbin shouts, gesturing around them, "That's what friends do! They give each other chances to be better!"

That causes Chan to laugh, loudly and so hard he doubles over. It's the fucking joke of the century, them being friends. He's not even friends with Felix because he knows for all his jokes about being best friends that it simply isn't true. 

When he glances at Changbin, it's a miracle that there's not smoke coming out of his ears from how red and angry he looks. Hell, he's surprised he isn't all metal now. 

"That's hilarious! We're not friends," Chan says, breathlessly. 

Changbin's jaw looks so tight that it might just fracture. "I'm starting to see that now."

It makes Chan's laugh die in his throat. Changbin's gaze is hard and his fists are glistening silver in the light, he flexes his hand and it's back to normal skin. 

"You know what," Changbin starts, voice cold and quiet and unsettling. Changbin is never those things in all the time they've been in each other's orbits. "I think you should leave."

Chan feels frozen in the chair, swallowing around nothing. It feels like sawdust has been shoved down his throat.

Changbin scoffs when he doesn't say anything, walking past him towards the door, holding it open wide. "You made your choice clear, so just leave us the fuck alone then."

The words echo in Chan's brain as he walks towards the door. Chan feels like he's experiencing the moment from the outside, a ghost of himself in that moment, but he knows that nobody is messing with his head this time. He walks past Changbin in a daze right into the hallway, the usually loud halls sounds terribly quiet.

"You know," Changbin starts, "I believed in you before the others. So did Jisung, he believed in you without question. But maybe we've all been wrong about you."

As soon as he finishes the sentence Changbin storms off into the distance before Chan can respond, not like he had anything to say anyways. 

His apartment is dark and empty when he returns, he doesn't even bother turning on the lights as he strips himself out of his suit, leaving it and all his gear in a giant heap in the middle of the floor. He doesn't even bother to head to his bedroom just flops onto his couch with a groan. His brain is moving a million miles per minute as he stares at the blank TV screen. Changbin's words echoing in his mind like a mantra: maybe we've all been wrong about you.

Chan doesn't leave his apartment for three entire weeks straight. Mrs. Kim visits on day six, she doesn't bother to ask what his problem is just states that she's glad he's not dead and shoves a Tupperware full of food into his hands before disappearing back to her own apartment. God, he loves that woman. 

By the end of the third week, he realizes he's being an idiot. He's letting Changbin's words get to him when there's no reason to since it didn't matter that he believed in him. Or even the fact that the others seemed to as well, because whatever belief they have, or rather had, in him was misplaced. He's always knew that, so why does it bother him so much?

He's gotta get back to work to focus on something else, so he heads straight to St. Arlost. 

"You look like shit," Sana greets him. "More than usual."

"Thanks," Chan answers, grinning at her, she looks distinctly unimpressed as he sits down at the bar.

"Where'd you disappear to?" Sana asks, "I thought you finally got yourself sent to the Icebox. Or killed."

"Come on, you know, you can't get rid of me that easily," Chan replies.

Sana snorts. "I know, I just hoped I'd finally be able to cash out," she says, mostly joking. "Also, don't tell me you're here to collect for the Wilson job because you're not getting that cut."

"What?" Chan asks, blinking, "But I did the job. Well, mostly did the job!"

Momo appears behind the bar carrying a box of beer, she snorts, "No you didn't." At Chan's dirty look, she adds, "We saw you on the news."

She then nods to the wall behind the bar, the one covered in pictures of all the regulars. Sure enough there's a printed out picture of Chan being carried by Changbin from a newscast; it's blurry from the zoom but he knows what's being shown. He'd refused to move out of protest and rather than trying to drag him across pavement, Changbin tossed him over his shoulder. 

"Besides," Sana says, "You didn't actually finish the job. The guys your friend handed to police were just some goons. Not who you are supposed to kill by the way."

Chan sighs heavily, shutting his eyes, "Okay, then I'll go finish the job."

When he opens his eyes, Sana is looking at him with a certain look and he already knows what that means. "Ryujin took the gig," she says, "And succeeded."

Chan pouts, so much for getting right back into the swing of things. "Alright," he says, "Just give me a new job, whatever's available."

The sun is setting outside, a glow of warm hues shining through the windows as Chan cleans his weapons. He's just finished sharpening his katanas, now moving onto his guns, taking his time as he carefully dismantles them to be able to clean every nook and cranny of them. He hums softly along to the music playing as he goes through the motions of it all. 

It's a peaceful evening.

Until someone starts banging loudly on his door, he immediately grabs the sword closest to him. He stares at the door, it's clear whoever it is isn't trying to rattle him, otherwise it'd be knocked over already. The knocking sounds urgent.

"Chan!" Felix shouts through the door, "Open up, we know you're there!"

He frowns as he gets up, moving towards the door. He hasn't spoken to any of the X-Men in months not since his fight with Changbin.

He opens the door to find Felix and Jeongin standing there, looking equal parts distressed; Jeongin moves past Chan easily as he comes inside. "Um. Hello?" he asks, watching Jeongin open every door he sees. He scoffs, turning towards Felix. 

"I would've called," Felix starts, he doesn't have to finish the sentence; Chan hadn't been answering any of his calls, or anybody else's for that matter since the fight.

"He's not here," Jeongin says, finally coming back to the door.

"Who?"

"Jisung," Felix answers, "He's missing."

"What do you mean he's missing?" Chan asks, worry building in his gut as he grips the hilt of his sword. 

"You really haven't heard from him," Jeongin says, an observation; he must sense Chan's confusion because his expression relaxes as he glances towards Felix. "He hasn't."

"Okay," Felix says, gesturing for Jeongin to come closer, "Sorry for bothering you, Chan."

"No, no, no," Chan says immediately, stopping them in their tracks. "What's going on?" 

Felix looks blank, a stark contrast to Jeongin's distraught expression. The two hesitate for a moment. "He wasn't in our dorm this morning. At first, I didn't think anything, but nobody's seen him since last night and his phone was on his bed," Jeongin admits. 

Chan's brows furrow. "What do you mean you can't find him? Did—"

"Minho tried," Jeongin answers, his frustration clear, "He can't find him, Jisung's blocking him again."

"What? What does that mean?"

"It's one of Jisung's powers, he's always been able to block psychic abilities," Felix says, leaning against the wall, he's fiddling with the ends of his sleeves. If it wasn't a natural thing, then it must've be one of the things that the scientists involved in Project X had made sure to make possible.

"Right," Chan nods, immediately walks over to his couch and sets down his sword, starting to reassemble and pack his belt. "What happened last night?"

They don't answer for a moment, he looks up to see them staring at him. Felix looks like he's trying to puzzle something out. Jeongin's smirking knowingly because of course he is.

"You want to help find him?" Felix asks, raising a brow.

Chan looks away and continues packing up. "Obviously. It seems like you guys don't know what you're doing if you came looking for him here." He glances up to see Jeongin opening his mouth, "Shut it, kid. Plus, tracking people down is my job."

Jeongin laughs, "Killing people is your job."

Chan sighs, before he moves towards his room. "But I need to track people down to do that, so it's half my job. Okay?"

Jeongin nods. He's grinning, looking happier and slightly smug as he watches Chan move around to get ready. That frantic frustration seeming to vanish. Felix looks apprehensive still, clearly not quite as ready to accept his help as easily as Jeongin has, which is to be expected.

He's suited up and in the X-Jet in no time ("We don't actually call it that," Jeongin says.), they're still on the ground though as Felix calls the others to see if there's been any changes, or if Jisung returned. No luck from the sounds of it. 

Chan begins racking his brain for where to start searching. Usually he goes for their known hang outs but Jisung barely knows anyone and doesn't leave the mansion much from what Jeongin says. There's Seungmin and Hyunjin but that's already ruled out, they have no reason to lie to Minho about Jisung not being there. In fact, Seungmin usually enjoys letting him know when one of his students has switched sides.

"All right, know it all," Chan says, snapping his fingers at Jeongin, who stares at his hand like he's tempted to use his powers to break it. His mouth curves slightly which means Chan definitely gave him that very idea. "What happened?"

Jeongin runs a hand through his hair, "I... It felt like he was getting better, happier. But he's been sad lately."

Chan frowns, a chasm forms in his chest, feeling like his heart is falling right through to his gut and sinking all of his insides along the way. "Okay," he starts, slowly, looking between the two of them, "Has he said anything that stands out?"

Jeongin's lip juts out slightly, his brows furrowed in concentration as he stares off to the side. It seems like he's remembering something that he isn't sure he should say. 

"Summer break started," Felix says, walking towards them. His arms over his chest, "Most of the kids usually go back home, it's sometimes tough on those who have to stay."

As in kids like Jisung who don't have a home to go back to, Chan fills in the blanks. That's definitely something that would cause a damper on his mood.

And it's true Jisung doesn't have a home, but he knows the closest place that could be considered one, as awful as it may have been. He looks at Felix, and says, "I think I have an idea where he might have gone."

Jeongin makes a noise, looking worried. 

"You don't mean..." Felix starts, face scrunching up, all twisted up and pained. 

"Time to go home, mate," Chan says dryly, switching to English, he laughs as Felix groans. "I'll fly us!"

"No, you won't," Felix states, eyes narrowed on him; he wastes no time heading to the pilot's seat, buckled up and waiting for them to do the same.

Chan grins because yeah, the whole situation sucks, but he never turns down the opportunity to head back home. "You ever been to Australia, Innie?"

"Never," Jeongin says, shaking his head, "Felix says it's nice though."

"Aw," Chan says, "We gotta show the kid around sometime. You know. Once we find Jisung."

Felix looks back at him with an odd look, "Sure."

It's dark when they reach their destination making the Facility look all the more daunting. The star filled sky doesn't even make it better, Chan clicks on his flashlight. The building is half burned down from when they were last here to save Jisung; it's far in the outback, completely isolated. The perfect spot for a highly secure government compound that was used for the type of things that Stryker did.

This place is a husk of all their pasts intertwining together, woven over and weaved tightly. It had felt freeing to burn it down, and to do it with Felix and Jisung beside him, because it may have been where they were each made into who they are today but it was nothing more than a prison. Even in ruins, it'll be haunting the three of them for the rest of their lives.

Chan feels a hand grasp his wrist lightly, far too hesitant. He looks to see Jeongin holding him, it's then he realizes his hands are shaking; Jeongin is watching him with a serious gaze. His other hand is in Felix's.

"You're okay," Jeongin says, timidly. "It's okay."

He feels himself snapping out of the current storm of emotions stirring up, a rush of peace settling over him.

And it hits him that Jeongin is so young, he doesn't deserve to be burdened by all the second hand pain and rage and grief that he's probably feeling from them right now. All the second hand emotions that he must feel every day. 

Jeongin takes a deep breath, looking away.

"I don't think anyone's been here," Felix says, sniffing the air. 

"I can't sense anyone, but we should check just in case," Jeongin says, taking his hand away from Chan, already walking down the sandy path. 

Felix shares a look with Chan, whatever is going through his mind he decides to shelve it, instead quickly following after Jeongin. Their flashlights bouncing around the desert as they close the distance between them and the facility. Chan separates from the two of them as they begin their search.

They search the ruins as carefully and quickly as they can. Chan grits his teeth at each sound that turns out to be nothing more than a wild animal. "No sign of him," Chan says over the comm that Felix handed to him, more of a sleek earpiece that he had to put on under his mask. 

"Yeah, it's been untouched for months," Felix replies. "Can't smell anything."

"Gross," Chan quips as he slowly makes his way out of the ruins. Felix swears at him under his breath, more muffled than anything.

It's as he's standing at the front of the building waiting for them to meet him, that a lightbulb goes off in his mind as he remembers something from last time they were here. 

The waves crash against shore in a peacefully slow rhythm. They landed as close as they could as to not alarm Jisung, unsure if he wants to be found. Chan begins thinking that he was wrong when he sees a lone figure sitting alone on the beach as they reach the edge of the parking lot.

"Okay, we found him," Chan says, "Go get him."

"You should talk to him," Jeongin pipes in, right as Felix starts to walk forward; Jeongin is holding Chan's gaze, steady and unwavering.

"I don't think it's a good idea," Chan starts, shaking his head.

"No, it should be you," Felix says, he looks sure about this decision, offering a reassuring smile. "You knew he'd be here."

Chan opens his mouth to argue but no sounds come out. He'd only end up repeating himself again, the same arguments on an endless cycle that he's no good and Jisung's better off without him. 

"You should let him decide that," Jeongin says evenly, "I can make you go over there. I'd rather not, but I will."

He sighs heavily, turning away from them, "Fine, I'll go, but don't blame me if he ends up running off again." He starts walking then stops, taking his mask off to remove the earpiece and handing it to Felix. He holds his mask in his hands and begins trudging through the sand. 

As he's walking he realizes just how small Jisung looks, all curled in on himself while watching the waves. When he finally reaches him, it hits him that this might be a mistake, but he's already made it this far.

"Hey, Jisung," he greets, taking the final few steps and sitting down beside Jisung.

If he's surprised Chan is here, he doesn't show it, only glances towards him with a frown before turning back towards the ocean. He's wearing one of the hoodies that Chan had borrowed him, loose on his small frame. He uncurls himself, legs stretching out in front of him.

"What are you doing here?" Jisung asks, voice a little raspy from disuse. His gaze hardening the longer he stares at Chan. 

"I came to find you," Chan says, he looks towards the ocean. The waves crashing peacefully onto the shore a few meters away from them. The moon reflects onto the refracted surface, glittering in the night like all the stars in the sky. 

"You found me, now you can leave me alone again," Jisung says harshly.

"Jisung," he starts.

"No, you said it yourself," his words are wavering. "So leave, I don't care."

Chan swallows hard, it's exactly what he knew would happen eventually, yet it's harder than he thought it would be. A sharp ache spreading throughout his chest. He breathes out, uneven and shaky. 

"I'll leave you alone," Chan starts, the words feeling like sand in his mouth, coarse and uncomfortable. "But you've gotta get back to the others."

Jisung's arms are wrapped around his torso, his lips wobbling slightly, shaking his head. "They're going to leave me too."

Chan's resolve crumbles, heart shattering as if the words ricocheted right past his ribs straight to it. In that moment, he realizes they're the same, both convinced being alone is inevitable, except where Chan's making sure it does happen, Jisung doesn't want it to.

"Jisung, look at me," he says, it takes several beats before Jisung meets his gaze, "They won't leave you alone. They're annoyingly persistent and they like you, so I think you're going to have to run to another planet to get away from them. Even then they'd still find a way to get to you."

Jisung's eyes a filling with tears as he blinks trying his best to fight them. "But... You left me."

"I know," Chan says, deflating. He looks down at the sand, God, he's going to have to clean his suit and gear all over again. "It wasn't because of you. I thought you wouldn't need me around."

"I don't need you," Jisung insists, "I..."

Chan waits patiently for an elaboration that never comes, Jisung is staring at the water. "Jisung?"

"I thought you cared."

Chan feels like he's swallowing a lung full of water. "I do."

"Then why'd you leave?"

He doesn't shout but it's worse that he says it so softly, in fact, it'd hurt less if he had shouted.

"Because I'm an asshole! Okay?" Chan answers, "You're better off without me."

Jisung looks close to tears, the fact that it's because of Chan feels like a knife through his chest. All that work to avoid hurting him, and he keeps doing it anyway.

"No, I'm not," Jisung says, quiet. "I... I care about you and I'm better because you helped me. Without you I..." He trails off, shaking his head in frustration. 

Without Chan, who knows where Jisung would be, right back at being manipulated into being a weapon. He wouldn't be at the Mansion, getting an education and having a normal life, or as normal as a life as he can. 

Chan digs his hand into the sand to stop himself from reaching out. He doesn't think they're there yet. "I, uh, I didn't want to hurt you, but I'm doing a shitty job at it."

Jisung laughs, weak and watery, more surprised than anything. "Yeah, you really are."

"I'll stick around, if that's what you want," Chan says.

Jisung's teary eyes are bright and wide as he stares at him like he doesn't quite believe him. "Do you mean it?"

Chan takes in a shaky breath, nodding. "Yeah, I'll stick around. Until you get sick of me and tell me to fuck off." The very thought makes his insides feel like a tangled knot, but he persists. "I promise."

Jisung stares at him, unwavering, as if he's trying to gauge how honest Chan is being. He probably wishes he had Jeongin or Minho by his side. After several long moments, he relents, "I will stab you if you try to leave and never come back."

It makes Chan laugh, his voice is so stern but there's unshed tears in his eyes. Chan nods, "And I'll let you."

Jisung sniffles, another watery laugh, and Chan immediately sticks out his hand with his pinky extended. Jisung's eyes stare down at his hand before he slowly extends his hand joining their pinkies. 

"It's a sealed deal," Chan remarks, smiling; using his other hand to pat his shoulder. "I'm sure it's been a long day, let's get you something to eat."

The dam holding back Jisung's tears breaks as he lets out a choked sob and nods. It makes Chan crumble as he finally surges forward and pulls him into a hug. "Hey, hey," he says softly, "You're okay."

It takes awhile for Jisung to calm down, Chan isn't sure how long it's been, but it feels like they sit in the sand for hours. Once his tears are dried up and he's ready to leave, they make the trudge back to the others. As they get closer to where the jet is parked, he finds that Felix and Jeongin aren't the only ones waiting for them. Jeongin's sitting on the ground his head resting on Changbin's shoulder as he fights sleep and on his other side is Minho in his wheelchair. 

Jisung straightens up, looking around at all of them, "You all came to find me?"

"Of course, we did," Felix says, closing the distance and pulling Jisung into a tight hug, Chan falls back to give them space. "You okay?"

Chan looks away as they whisper quietly, watching the others all turn their attention towards him. Jisung breaks from the hug, only for Changbin to quickly envelope him into a bone crushing hug as well. It's overwhelming, though Jisung seems to take to it like a moth to a flame. 

He thinks they're seconds away from making it a group hug. 

The mansion is filled as all the kids come back for the fall semester. Chan trudges towards the back gardens where the birthday party is happening. He hears the music blasting and sees kids running around laughing loudly as they chase each other around the grounds. 

When he gets near, he finds tables and chairs all set up and balloons scattered around, the garden fully decked out in decorations.

Chan takes a deep breath, adjusting his hat as he walks closer, scanning the crowd. 

"You're here!"

Chan turns to find Jisung barreling towards him, a ball of barely contained energy, grinning brightly. 

"I told you I'd be bothering you until you tell me to fuck off," Chan says, grinning in return, he lifts up the gift wrapped box. "Happy birthday, kid."

Jisung's eyes widen as he takes it eagerly, "What is it?"

"Gotta open it. But usually people do that after cake, so you'll have to wait and see."

Jisung rolls his eyes, then nods his head towards a certain direction, "The others are sitting over there if you want to join."

Chan looks over to see where he's gesturing to, he sees Minho and Seungmin playing chess as Jeongin sits beside them eyes sharp. Felix is laughing up a storm as he talks to Hyunjin. He turns to find Changbin in metallic form chasing after screeching kids as they shoot at him with water guns. Chan makes his way over to the table, sitting down, easily greeted and being sucked into the conversations around him. 

And Chan thinks maybe Seungmin and Hyunjin are onto something with their rocky balance between adversary and ally with the team. It feels like a real family, something easing the twisted up knots in his chest, replaced with a sense of belonging as he sits back and watches them all delve into an easy conversation.

Chan still has no intention in joining the X-Men, but he's starting to see the appeal in sticking around for as long as he can.