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Rose had to put a hand over her own mouth to stop herself gasping aloud at the sight before her. This physical and kind of alarming reaction to the Doctor reaching a hand back and tugging his green jumper over his head startled her.
The way she couldn’t drag her eyes away from the muscles in his back startled her even more. In her peripheral vision, she could see that the Doctor had tossed the jumper towards the jumpseat and miss, the fabric falling to the grating instead. But her gaze quite stubbornly remained focussed on his back, occasionally drifting down to the dimples above his belt, and, oh god, the tiny glimpse of the band of his boxer briefs that peeked out over the waistband of his jeans.
Suddenly, Rose Tyler was quite aware of the Doctor being a man. She didn’t know why, in the weeks she’d been here already, her brain hadn’t quite caught up with her body on this matter; because she realised with newfound clarity that she’d had these butterflies in her stomach, and the tingling sensation that spread lower still, for some time. Her mind, however, just now pieced together what those feelings meant.
She actually fancied him. The Doctor. Her best mate, her - her time-travelling, alien best friend.
Shit.
::
The Doctor heard a tiny hitch of breath and turned around, greeting Rose with a smile. “All right?”
Her eyes were on his chest, and he realised abruptly that he’d just taken his jumper off, having stained it with grease while tinkering.
“Oh, sorry,” he said, with a sheepish grin, bounding over to where he’d thrown it. He retrieved it, intending to cover up, thinking maybe she had some aversion to seeing him half-naked, if her wide, startled eyes were anything to go by. Mind you, this was his console room and she was meant to be asleep - how was he supposed to know she’d wander in on him? So she couldn’t act too affronted at the notion he might unclothe occasionally, surely.
“No - it’s, that’s okay, you don’t need to - ” she stammered, before blushing bright red. “You’re fine like that. Really, really - fine.”
His brow furrowed, and went to put the jumper on anyway, but she made another squeak of protest, and he stared at her. “What?”
“Nothing.” Rose shook her head quickly, and adjusted her stance, pulling on the hem of her hoodie, as though trying to tug it lower to obscure his vision of her thighs in those pyjama shorts she liked to wear. Not that he was looking, obviously.
“Rose, what’s up? Can’t you sleep?”
“You’re a man,” she blurted out, then bit into her bottom lip and squeezed her eyes shut, clearly embarrassed.
“I - what?” He glanced down at himself needlessly. “Yeah, I’m a man - so?”
Her eyes fluttered open. “Sorry. Think I’m just tired, dunno why I…” she trailed off, and he got the distinct impression she was staring at his abdomen.
“Have you got a problem with how I look, or something?” he asked, amused, and dropped his jumper again in favour of crossing his arms.
“No, I just never really thought - I mean, you’re not human, so I kind of didn’t think - but - ” She winced. “Sorry, am I being offensive?”
The Doctor chuckled. “I dunno, are you insulting me?”
“No! Course not.”
Unfolding his arms, he closed the distance between them, and saw her hands clench into fists when he got within touching distance.
“I am a bit offended,” he mused, tilting his head to assess her reaction. “But I’m quite forgiving, me. And for some reason, though I suspect you’re poking fun, I find it very easy to forgive you.”
“I’m not poking fun,” she murmured, and he watched as she swallowed hard. “I’m just…experiencing a bit of a revelation.”
“That I’m a man?” he asked, lifting his eyebrows.
“That you’re quite…”
“Yeah?”
“Sexy.”
He burst out laughing. “What?”
Rose’s face deepened in colour. “Don’t laugh at me.”
“I’m not laughing at you, I just - you don’t really - ” He paused, squinting at her. “You don’t really think I’m sexy, Rose.”
She shifted uncomfortably. “Well, you are, so.”
“Probably being cooped up in here with just me for the last couple of days, it’s made you go a bit loopy. Don’t worry, I’ll take you somewhere with plenty of pretty boys to look at tomorrow,” he teased, nodding definitively at his reasoning. Best she didn’t even entertain the thought of him being attractive to her; he wasn’t interested in her thinking that sort of thing. Much. At least, not if she didn’t mean it -
“Doctor, shut up. Just ‘cos I said I realised you’re kind of hot doesn’t mean I’ve gone bonkers, or that you need to show me something shiny to distract me. I get it, you’re not interested, and actually, neither am I, okay? I can think you’re sexy without wanting to - ” She cut herself off, huffing.
He stared at her. “Without wanting to what?”
She sighed. “To…do anything about it.”
“Such as?”
“Come off it, you’re not that thick.” Ducking her head, she fiddled with the hem of her hoodie, pulling at a loose string.
Without really meaning to, he reached out, stealing one of her hands, giving it a squeeze. “You might feel differently, once you’ve slept on it.”
She let out a quiet laugh. “I thought you were gonna say, ‘once you’ve slept with me,’ for a second there.”
“Rose.”
Her head tilted up and she met his gaze bravely, something in her expression telling him that she was certain she was about to be rejected. It made him want to be gentle with her, even though a sterner approach would get it through to her quicker that they couldn’t be like that, couldn’t do…those things.
“We can’t. There’s nothing I’d like more than to tell you how beautiful I think you are and how much I want to kiss you, but - we can’t. You’re…I’m…we need to stay as we are.”
“Just friends,” she murmured, swallowing.
“Mmm. Besides, in the morning, you’ll wake up and realise you were talking nonsense anyway, especially once you get a glimpse of this daft old face in natural light.” He nodded to the console. “That green glow does wonders for me in those tired eyes of yours.”
Rose laughed, as he’d intended her to, but then she heaved a huge sigh. “Can I just do one thing? Just, just for this moment?”
He shrugged a shoulder in invitation, eager to see what she’d do.
She placed her hands either side of his chest, over his hearts, and just stood there for a few moments.
“Do they always beat this fast?” she whispered.
“Yes.” He shook his head at his own lie. “No. Sometimes.”
“When I’m…”
“Yes.”
There was something knowing in her expression, now, and he clung onto it, hoped she really did understand. It would ease his guilt at saying no to her advances, if in her heart she knew the truth.
“Okay,” she said softly, trailing her hands down his torso before lifting off completely. “Guess that’ll keep me going ‘til you change your mind.” With a cheeky grin, she backed away from him, and he shook his head at her affectionately.
“Goodnight, Rose.”
“Night, Doctor.”