Work Text:
Silver spoon threw his phone on the ground. He felt terrible, like there were bugs in his skin trying to bite their way out..
He was an Asshole today. Or at least he felt like he was. Sure, the things he said weren't particularly rude. And the people he was talking to didn't say he was being rude.. But they were lying, weren't they. All of them were uncomfortable and angry at him for being so self centered. Yesterday he said he would be better, the day before that, HE SAID HE WOULD BE BETTER. Look at him now, feeling pathetic and desperate for someone to hold him. He doesn't deserve it. He deserves pain more than anything.
He reached under his pillow, grabbing his terrible old friend.. The pocket knife.. Enbedded with gems.. It looked disgusting. Why won't the noise stop. Why would it SHUT Up. Noise noise noise noise noise noise noise noise noise noise noise. SHUT UP UP SHUT UP SHUT UP.
Slice.. One cut.. It was weak, pathetic.. His thigh wasn't even bleeding. It was basically a crack in a phone screen.
Slice.. Still weak. He should've learnt from the last one.. Dumbass..
Maybe he should stop.. What if someone finds out..
No. If his friends found out, they would be happy. He deserves it..
Does he though? He doesn't feel like he deserves pain deep on the inside..
Of course he does. If he says doesn't than people will say he's just pretending it's bad..
Its addiction.. Isn't it?
....
Oh... His thigh.. It's covered in blood.. When did that happen?..
He stands up, walking to the bathroom with a trail of blood drips and drops behind him.. He gets in the shower, sitting in the bath until the blood stops running.. He feels even worse now..
Its fine..
He'll do better tomorrow..