Work Text:
The Colorful Circus of Lies.
Emmy awoke in the familiar barn, her overalls were covered in the horse manure that she was supposed to have already cleaned up, she groaned in disgust and stood up, wiping the disgustingly solid feces from her skin, which was caked on. Her nose crunched up at the smell of the barn; the manure, which had built up, made the air feel hot.
Emmy looked up from where she stood, staring out of the cracks in the top of the barn, it was inky outside, which could only mean she hadn’t completed her chores for that day; she already knew her parents would be disappointed in her, she could feel her brows dripping with sweat at the thought of facing her parents after not having cleaned the farmhouse.
She suddenly saw vivid lights in the sky, they were coming from the town center, which was near her home. She pushed the heavy barn doors open with surprising strength for having just woken up, and she stepped outside into the humid air.
The air was warm, almost uncomfortably warm in fact, she did not like it. She tried to wipe the manure from her brow, but only succeeded in smearing it further. She stepped forward with hesitant steps, she knew that if she didn’t go home, her parents would worry… in their own strange way. She shook her head as if talking to herself; if she went home surely her parents would chastise her. Emmy grimaced at the thought of another lecture, and another night of going to bed in pig slop, she was shocked out of her thought by the sound of fireworks; her head snapped in the direction, which so happened to be the opposite direction of her home. Emmy slowly started making her way to the colorful lights in the sky.
Emmy’s eyes widened at the colorful tapestry that hung from the walls and the tents around the town square, why were these tents put up? They weren’t usually there. Emmy walked over to a tall wooden pole, which had a flyer bottled onto it:
“The Tapestry Circus: Help NEEDED”
Is what the strange flyer read, the flyer had six people on it: a woman wearing a blue leotard, which had silver jewels dancing all over, another woman who had on a leotard, but this one was pink with golden jewels, a male with fake angel wings, which were spread out behind everyone, a woman and a man, who looked normal enough, and a man, who wore a top hat, kneeled in front of everyone, holding his hand out. The man in the middle, who was kneeled gave Emmy a chill, but she couldn’t pinpoint why, perhaps it was because of his sparkless eyes, or perhaps because of his grin, which seemed to have far too many teeth for Emmy to trust.. whatever it was, frightened her.
Emmy’s attention was back on the tent behind the water fountain, it was a massive, red tent. Emmy sucked up her anxiety, and pushed past the tent flaps. Emmy’s eyes widened in shock at the loud sounds of cheers as the women, who had been in leotards, swung from trapeze together, one after the other. On the ground were the two normal looking people, but they were wrapped up in silk together, swinging. The man with fake angel wings was suspended in the air, the wings he wore had nearly invisible strings on them as he pretended to fly around the tent. The male with the top hat was nowhere to be seen.
Emmy watched with amazement as the acts continued, until it was nearly midnight. Suddenly everyone came to stand on the ground in the small area where the freakishly agile people performed. They all linked arms and bowed, the two women in leotards, noses were practically touching the ground with how low they’d bowed. Soon all the audience members drained from the tent, leaving Emmy alone with the circus performers, who had yet to notice her freakishly small, and dirty form.
“Maria, that was wonderful, my dear- and Isabella, I saw how you fell, are you okay?” a seemingly British, male voice asked as the man with the top hat came out to see the artists, who had not even let out a breath of exhaustion.
“Yes, yes, I am okay Mr.Alden, thank you for your concern..” the woman, who wore the blue leotard answered; Emmy could assume she was Isabella.
“Mr.Alden…” the angel man suddenly said, which earned him a sharp look from ‘Mr.Alden’.
“Yes Otto?” he asked sharply, his tone making the angel man, Otto, wince.
“It seems one of our guests has not left yet.”
Emmy wanted to move, she knew that she had been noticed; she wasn’t the best at picking up on cues, but she could tell that she would be in trouble if seen, but she couldn’t move, so she didn’t.
Mr.Alden’s eyes perked up, and he flipped his top hat onto his head, “Why didn’t you say so Otto?” he laughed wholeheartedly and flipped his cane, before sauntering over to Emmy, who felt severely underdressed in contrast to this man.
“Hello there, little one!” he said in an excited tone, and he put his cane down, squatting down to her height, “Well aren’t you small?” he chuckled warmly, something in his eyes seemed to shift as he noticed how messy she seemed, he had seemed almost luring beforehand, but now he seemed more genuine.
“Miss Carmeno and Mister Carmeno, please grab plenty of towels and buckets of water..” he snapped his fingers, and the two silk dancers, who she assumed to be married, left in a hurry. “What’s your name?” The male hummed with interest, seeming to be buzzing with adrenaline, which confused her, but she didn’t want to ask and offend this stranger.
“My name is Emmy…” she said meekly, internally cringing at the sound of her own voice.
Before the brunette male could continue, the silk dancers came back; they both had a bucket of water and two towels.
Emmy wasn’t completely paying attention while the ringmaster and the performers spoke, so she let out a confused squeak when suddenly she was being whisked across the room by Isabella and Maria.
Emmy was dragged through the colorful circus, her bare feet padding against the cloth floor of the big tent, which the two beautiful women were pulling her out of.
“Where are we going?” Emmy asked excitedly; she didn’t know why, but her hands were wet with the familiar sticky sweat that often painted her palms, but it didn’t feel bad like it usually did.
“We’re going to the bath,” Isabella started, before turning her head to talk to Emmy, “we’re gonna clean you up!”
Emmy’s nose crinkled up at the sight of Isabella’s nearly fully turned neck, which had to have hurt. Emmy merely nodded and let the two women drag her to the washroom, where they bathed her thoroughly, and scraped off the manure that was caked onto her tanned skin.
Once they were done washing her, they sat her in front of a mirror, where they did her hair.
Emmy couldn’t be bothered to watch them braid her hair, she was more paying attention to her appearance. Emmy hadn’t seen her clean skin in years; the only words she could think to describe herself was unusual, she didn’t recognize herself at all. Emmy’s hair, which was usually matted with feces in it, was brushed back to a beautiful raven color, her skin, which was tanned from having so much work outside, was clean but it had acne all over it. Emmy was cut from her thoughts when Isabella’s sweet voice spoke.
“There we are, all done.” her voice was calm and soft, almost unhearable if you weren’t trying to listen to her in the first place.
Emmy stammered out a thanks, too shocked at her youthful appearance to cringe at her meak voice.
“Isa…” Maria started, and leaned in to whisper something in Isabella’s ear, which was too quiet for Emmy to fully understand.
“Ah… Emmy, Mr.Alden would like to see you…” Isabella informed Emmy, and patted her shoulder, signaling for her to get up.
Emmy nodded and got up from the seat she sat upon, her face crinkled up at the sound of her bones popping, before she turned around and gave a small thanks to Isabella and Maria, before the two women led her to the tent where Mr.Alden stayed.
Isabella stomped her foot with surprisingly loud noise, which Emmy assumed was their way of knocking.
“Come in..” the British male called from inside the tent.
Isabella nodded for Emmy to open the tent and go inside, which she did. Emmy pulled the tassel, which pulled open the tent ‘doors’, and stepped inside.
“How lovely for you to join me, Emmy.” the male sighed, and stood up, offering a firm handshake, before motioning his hand towards the seat in front of the small desk in his tent.
Emmy gave a nod of her head, and made her way to the small wooden seat that Mr.Alden pointed at.
“Why did you ask me to join you in your tent?” she asked worriedly, her palms now covered in the sticky sweat, which she hated very much.
“Well, I know we have just met, but I can’t help but feel bad, and a little worried for you dear.” he said warmly, but his smile told a different story. Mr.Alden’s lips were curled up in a deceitful smile, like one of those sirens that Emmy had read about in books.
Emmy shivered in her seat, she felt like a sheep in front of a wolf, a very hungry wolf. “Why are you worried for me, sir?” she asked politely, which made the male smile.
“Put yourself in my shoes, dear, a young girl has darkened my doorstep, and she is covered in horse waste, why would I not be concerned?”
Emmy blushed from embarrassment at the somewhat condescending tone the male in front of her had, her tanned cheeks turned red and her hands clutched the beautiful, white nightgown she’d been put into. “I… did not think of our meeting like that..” she said slowly, every word dripping with somewhat bitterness.
“Why, of course you didn't, dear..” he sighed and shook his head; his voice dripped with patronization.
Her eyebrows furrowed and her eyes glinted with tears, she had always hated being mocked. “What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked sharply, feeling her tears threaten to drip from her eyes.
“Nothing, nothing…” he hummed, she sighed, but let it go, “This might seem out of the blue, but I noticed how amazed you were at my circus performers, would you like to see them everyday?”
Emmy tilted her head, the curiosity outshining her insulted ego “What do you mean?” she asked quickly, her words speeding up from her butterfly filled stomach.
“Would you like to join my circus?” he asked exasperatedly, a bit fed up with her idiocy.
Emmy sunk into her seat, her skin crawling at his stare. Although his words did not show it, his eyes were appraising her, and watching her every move. “Join your circus?” she asked suspiciously, narrowing her eyes, “Why would you ask me that so suddenly?” she huffed, crossing her arms and cocking an eyebrow.
“You seem athletic enough, Isa and Ria told me how muscular you seem.”
Her nose crunched up, Isabella and Maria told him about her body? She’d have to remind herself to never let anyone bath her again. “Of course I’m athletic, I work on a farm.” she said, a little bite to her words as she glared at the man in front of her.
“Really? You don’t seem old enough to be manual labor yet…” he chirped.
Emmy’s eyes widened as she realized that she just told this absolute stranger mom’s number one rule, never tell anyone about the farm. “Oh.” was all she said, curling up in her seat, trying to make herself smaller.
Mr.Alden suddenly smirked, tilting his head and resting his chin in his palm. “How old are you?” he hummed curiously.
Emmy’s eyes squinted at the male’s grin, “Fifteen…” she said slowly, her hands squeezing tighter around her stomach.
“Fifteen? Hmm… perfect!” he suddenly clapped his hands together, making her flinch slightly.
Emmy’s eyes widened at the praise, it hadn’t meant to be praise, but it felt that way to her. She felt a smile grow onto her face, and a small giggle escaped her mouth; the male in front of her raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.
“Well? Would you like to join my circus?” he asked once again, tilting his head.
“I…” she paused, and bit her lip. If she left… What would her parents say? She melted further into her seat at the thought of facing her parents after leaving. After a few minutes of thought, her worry came to a stop, maybe her parents would be happier if she left? They always complained about her, so they would definitely be happier, right? A smile grew onto her face as she thought about her parents finally being proud of her, and she finally nodded. “Yes sir.” she said firmly.
An unsettling smile found its way onto Mr.Alden’s face, and he nodded slowly, before speaking “Good.. then, let the show begin.”
Emmy heard a little movement outside the tent, which made her frown. “What was that?” she asked.
“What was what, dear?” he hummed, a silly smile on his face.
She smiled, forgetting about the movement from outside the tent momentarily. She shook his hand firmly “Let the show begin.” she agreed.
Many years passed after that, town after town, and act after act. It all blended together in Emmy’s mind, but she was happy.
Emmy was performing in a show, she was eighteen years old now. She was an acrobat, which she very much enjoyed. She loved seeing the children's faces light up when she started flipping up and down on a tightrope.
It was night time, right after one of their shows.
Emmy couldn’t find anyone, she had been searching for Mr.Alden, but he was gone.
One of the main rules in the circus was to never enter anyone else’s tent without their permission, but she urgently needed to talk to Mr.Alden, so she entered his tent.
The air in the tent was hot, and it smelled musty, kind of like molded food, but a bit more intense.
She walked through the tent gingerly, looking around with amazement. Her eyes looked everywhere, from the monkeys in cages, to the three puppies sleeping on the small foldable cot.
Mr.Alden’s tent was the biggest, he claimed it was because he was the ringmaster, he had to have such a big tent, but Emmy assumed it was just because he was a bit selfish.
Emmy’s nose puckered up at the terrible smell that came from the big, black tupperware container at the very end of the tent. She rolled her eyes, Mr.Alden always forgot to take the trash out. Emmy walked over to the container quickly, assuming it was just rotting trash or something of the sorts. She was about to open the container when she noticed something on the shelf next to the cot; she paused for a moment before walking over to the shelf. She tilted her head, it was three, big, rainbow lollipops.
Mr.Alden had a massive rule against giving candy out to guests, and he hated candy.
Emmy grabbed one of them and grimaced, on closer inspection, she could see that the lollipops edges were crusty and the sugar seemed to have separated from the dye. Emmy put the lollipops back in the container and shook her head, trying not to gag.
The odor of the container had only gotten stronger, it was making Emmy dizzy.
Emmy hesitantly walked over to the container once again, now her hands covered in sweat and her eyes watering from the burning smell. She put her hand on the container’s handle, and lifted it slowly. She closed her eyes and gagged, covering her mouth with her free hand, before opening one eye experimentally. Her mouth fell open and she let go of the handle, her legs started shaking.
Inside the container were multiple bodies of small children, all of their eyes had been decomposed and roaches were crawling all over the bodies, and their mouths had larva in them, slithering around. The smell of their decomposing bodies were ill-smelling.
Emmy fell back, her hands covering her mouth and her eyes welling up with tears, her throat letting out almost inhuman sounding sobs. Her eyes shot open at the feeling of a big hand grabbing her shoulder, she hadn’t been able to hear the footsteps over her sobs.
“Emmy.” the familiar voice of Mr.Alden said sternly, his grip on her shoulder tightening.
“Wha…W…” Emmy couldn’t even speak through her words, her breathing brcame rapid, yet thin. She stared up at him, her eyes widened with terror, before she curled up into a ball, just sobbing on the floor.
“Emmy, let me explain…” he started, kneeling on the ground in front of her.
She shook her head and slapped his hand away, getting up unsteadily, and bolting away to her only safe-space now, her tent. She quickly zipped her tent up, and gripped her hair, letting out choked sobs. She stomped over to her cot, grabbing the suitcase underneath it and beginning to pack up all her belongings, which wasn’t much.
“Emmy, please let me explain!” Mr.Alden said from outside her tent.
She sniffled and continued to pack up her items, not stopping the man from speaking.
“I wanted to tell you, really I did, but… those children…” he stopped and let out a deep sigh.
Emmy could envision him running his freakishly long fingers through his hair and looking exasperated.
“Those children had it coming.” he finally decided, sighing once again.
Her heart hurt, how could those little children deserve what happened to them?
“Those children kept on throwing tantrums during the shows, they… were just so ungrateful…” he scoffed.
“That doesn’t mean they deserved to die!” she blinked away her tears, feeling her eyebrows furrow at his insane logic.
“Doesn’t it?!” he yelled, and laughed humorlessly “Children are terrible already, all they do is latch onto their parents, but then they have the insolence to yell and scream, as if they aren’t just parasites!”
Her bottom lip quivered, feeling her mind flood with memories of her old life, had she truthfully deserved the endless beatings she endured? Perhaps that was just the way her parents disciplined her, was that just the way her parents stopped her from becoming a brat?
“Don’t be dramatic, after all, who would teach them if not me?” his voice was only a whisper, yet it echoed through her mind.
“I…” she paused, slumping down on her cot, going quiet. His words made sense to her, she didn’t like it, but she couldn’t help but to listen to him. “If… their parents don’t teach them, then someone needs to…” she said slowly, nodding along as she spoke her words.
“Good job, dear, that’s exactly what I’ve been saying..” Mr.Alden said slowly, his voice sounding almost condescending.
Emmy slowly stood up from her cot, and shambled over to the tent opening, and re-opened her tent flaps. Her face subconsciously lit up at the gentle smile of Mr.Alden.
“Come, come…” he said warmly, and started walking towards a tall building. “Now that you understand why I must do this, can you do me a favor?” he asked, grabbing one of the crusty lollipop’s from his room out of his pocket. “You see that blonde girl…?” he whispered, pointing the lollipop at a small blonde girl, who seemed to be crying on the bench alone.
“Yes…?” she muttered, not seeing where this was going.
“Bring her over here.” he said gently, his voice echoing through her mind.
She nodded softly, repeating his prior words in her mind, children are parasites, before walking over to the blonde child and smiling warmly at her. “Hey sweetie… why’re you crying?” she asked gently, reaching up to brush a few tears away from the girl’s cheek.
“M-My mommy didn't buy m-me a lollipop!” she sobbed.
Emmy’s eyes hardened, feeling the pent up anger and jealousy of bratty kids, normal kids build up inside her chest. She clenched her fists and looked around, they were alone; besides for Mr.Alden leaning on the building. Emmy didn’t think before she grabbed the small girl’s head and slammed it into the pavement, over, and over again. Emmy kept doing it over and over, until she heard clapping.
“Good job, Emmy!” Mr.Alden suddenly said, making Emmy look up.
Emmy’s frown twitched up into a smile, all she had ever wanted was someone's love, and now she had it. Emmy let go of the limp little girl’s head and broke down into tears, her hands reaching out to clutch Mr.Alden’s leg and sob into it.
“Oh- there, there… it’s okay…” he said soothingly, patting the back of her head gingerly.
Everything that happened after that was a blur, until Emmy laid down in her cot. She thought about everything that had happened, and her smile faltered. She felt loved, but… the guilt was clawing at her heart. She shook her head, and closed her eyes, laying her head to the side and drifting off to sleep, her heart hurting at the memory of what she did to that child, but she was loved now, so it was okay… right?