Archive of Our Own

“That every night I'll kiss you, you'll say in my ear
Oh we're in love, aren't we?
Hands in your hair
Fingers and thumbs, baby
I feel safe when you're holding me near
Love the way that you conquer your fear
You know hearts don't break around here”
-“Hearts don't break around here” Ed Sheeran

Sam couldn't take his eyes off her.
Even after all those years together as a couple, on and off screen. On TV and in real life.
He couldn't. He didn't want to. God, he wasn't physically capable.
He had to fix every little detail, every nuance, every expression in his memory; so he could play it back again in his mind every minute he would spend away from her.
Caitríona was radiant. As she always had been in those last years together. Her hair fell elegantly just below her shoulders. Her makeup was light, there hadn't even been a need to touch it up at the makeup station because she was always beautiful. Flawless.
In every situation.
She was wearing long pants of an autumnal yellow, a white V-neck T-shirt with a light brown formal jacket over it. She had already dressed at home, having good taste. And she had insisted on dressing him, too.
And Sam had let her do it, as always. She was certainly a woman of many qualities. And one of them was that she was never out of style.
He, on the other hand, was wearing dark blue jeans combined with a black T-shirt and a navy blue fake leather jacket.
Sam was supposed to be listening to the interviewer's questions, but he really couldn't take his eyes off his wife.
It was the same old interviews. The same old questions.
After almost eleven years of “Outlander” the man could have answered with his eyes closed. Journalists never had much imagination. They just offered him the same old stuff: the plot of the episodes and how it developed, gossip, behind-the-scenes trivia, questions about their private lives.
Lots of questions about their private life. It seemed like ever since he and Cait came out, everyone wanted a piece of them, their privacy.
Being an extremely private person, he did his best, but he would stiffen when someone asked him, insistently, what the woman he loved was like inside the home. How could he even try to explain how wonderful the woman sitting next to him was? She was the perfect woman, even without trying to be. Fortunately, his wife was much better at managing interviews than he was, even in this situation, and her presence reassured him.
And he knew that for her the reassurance was mutual.
So they had implemented a common strategy: to give little information, carefully selected in order to protect their privacy. Both during the interviews and on their respective social profiles.
And so far that plan has proven to be a winning one.
-Sam, do you want to answer first?-.
The interviewer's voice took him by surprise.
Cait squeezed his hand, stretching out on her stool, and he smiled.
-Excuse me?- he asked politely.
The two women laughed.
Cait's fingers tightened their grip even more.
-What was your first impression of her?-.
Classic question.
Leanna Aguleria had interviewed them together several times before. She had been working for the network “E! Entertainment Tonight” for years, and yet, every single interview always touched on the same topics.
It was all part of the game.
The man grinned. They had answered that specific question about a thousand times before, but he was always happy to recount their first meeting.

It was love at first sight.
At least it had been that way for him.
He had been lucky enough to have already been hired for the job. He had read the script his agent had given him, gone to the audition and won them all over.
He was Jamie Fraser, at least according to “Outlander” author Diana Gabaldon. She even got emotional during his audition and told him she had goosebumps the whole time.
“Sam, you are Scottish to the core and yet Jamie Fraser at heart.”
She had been telling him this for days. He had smiled nervously.
He was alone in this adventure and, honestly, he was quite terrified that this whole thing might turn out to be something bigger than himself.
He needed his Claire. A partner with whom he could share his joys, fears, and anxieties.
They had searched for her for weeks, months, and finally they had found her.
Caitríona Balfe.
She had arrived late for their chemestry screen test. Out of breath, her hair disheveled, her clothes wrinkled from the rush from the cab to the studios.
It certainly wasn't an idyllic first impression for the cast and crew.
But he hadn't cared in the slightest.
He had fallen in love with her the exact moment her sky blue eyes met his cobalt blue ones.
The scene they had to rehearse together was incredibly physical and touching. And that only made her nervous. Caitríona had rehearsed the scene in her apartment, dozens and dozens of times, in front of a mirror. She had almost become obsessed because she really wanted the part.
The day of her audition, there was insane traffic and she was late. She would never admit it, but the fact was, that was almost a characteristic of her. It happened to her often, but rarely at work appointments.
And then she met Sam. He shook her hand and smiled.
He was calm, sweet, friendly. A solid presence.
His eyes stared at hers expressively, asking permission before touching her and holding her close. Qualities she had greatly appreciated. During her years as a model and actress, especially at the beginning of her career, there had been some unpleasant episodes with colleagues and managers, which the woman would have preferred to forget. Some people liked to get too handsy with her. So she gave Sam a reassuring expression.
He was so kind, so patient. He made her feel at ease right away. He was a down-to-earth guy. She immediately felt she could trust him.
And they had started rehearsing that scene.
And Sam didn't understand anything anymore.
Wow, that must have really pissed her off. Was it too intense? Too direct? He was practically screaming in the face of a stranger. He'd done this before in auditions, but this was different.
He pulled her into a bear hug and felt her stiffen under his touch.
She smelled good. Of violets, cinnamon and honey.
It was intoxicating.
When they were finished Sam glanced quickly at Ron, Maril and Diana. They were smiling.
They liked her.

-No, shut up, love. I'll start. I remember exactly one of the first sentences you said to me- Caitríona interrupted him before he could even open his mouth to speak and formulate a meaningful sentence.
Her eyes were mischievous and Sam rolled his.
He knew exactly where his wife was going with this.
-Yes, I remember very well where we were. After our chemestry test we went for a walk in the fields in Castleton. And you said to me, these exact words: “You know? The camera ages you”-.
Sam coughed and tried to clarify the situation.
He knew the press would love this particular story. The interviewer’s eyes widened and a sly smile spread across her face. Fans would be thrilled. As much as he and Cait were eternally grateful for each other’s successes at work, having to constantly defend their privacy and that of their families was exhausting at times. And he wanted to take it on. He didn’t want Cait to have to handle that burden alone. She’d done enough of it when they weren’t together.
-Did I really say that? - he asked, uncertainly – I was probably trying to pay you a compliment and I babbled that meaningless sentence-.
And it was the truth.
She intimidated him. She was an amazing actress, a beautiful model. And he?
He was nobody to her. He tried to look cool, to act like a cool guy. But he wasn’t. He liked women. He liked to filter with them, to date them, to make it clear that he had no interest in stumbling into a serious relationship. His job was his priority right now. This show could really be his springboard. He didn’t want to feel locked into a relationship. He especially didn’t want to get married or have kids. And he was surprised to find that many women shared his ideals. Sam had had countless one-night stands. Women were crazy about him. No strings attached. No complications. No pressure of any kind.
But not Cait. With her it had been different from the beginning.
-No, really! You really said that, Heughan! - she corrected him. A genuine laugh came out of her and Sam reveled in the sight. His wife's laughter was the sweetest sound in the universe.
God. Let it never stop. He lived for the happiness of that woman. As long as he heard that laughter, then he would have air in his lungs and blood in his heart.
Blood of my blood and bone of my bones. Now and forever. As long as I shall live.
He decided to play along and respond in a joking manner.
-It was… it is… you are gorgeous in real life, but the camera doesn't do you justice and makes you look older-.
The woman's eyes sparkled. Sam gave her a quick peck on the cheek.
He had given an answer that she approved of. For that night, she would still sleep in the master bedroom they shared.
He was safe.
Leanne let out an -Awww! You guys are so cute!-.
Sam could clearly see in the woman's eyes the views that interview would bring her. The money the network would earn. The compliments of their respective marketing managers.
But he really meant every single word.
He loves her. He would have forgiven her everything, he would have done anything for Caitríona and their families.
And that unfortunate phrase, uttered years before by the Scotsman, certainly did not prevent the actress from sharing her true feelings about working with him in the early days.
His wife turned to the presenter again.
-I remember very well how it was at the beginning with Sam. First of all, we were very comfortable with each other…- anyone could see it. She and Sam had become close friends right away. Their relationship almost mirrored Claire and Jamie's, but without the romantic feeling. They were very physical, affectionate and caring towards each other. -But you are so magnetic on screen, honey- she joked affectionately.
Sam grinned. It was just them again. In their little bubble of happiness. In their little enchanted world.
Of course she had to respond to a compliment like that. She couldn’t help it. It had always been like that between them, after all. The bickering, the teasing, the little daily flirtations. They had been a married couple long before they actually became one in real life.
-What are you trying to do? Are you trying to sweeten me up so I'll behave?-
The joke elicited another laugh. The interviewer’s was almost fake, he could tell by the look on her face. But Caitríona’s was full of authenticity, sincere. It went straight to his heart. He was short of breath for a moment. Cait’s hands were clasped over her mouth, a big, sincere smile. Her blue eyes were shining. She was looking at him in a way that was so… so special.
God. He loved her like crazy.
He couldn't resist and kissed her hand that was holding his.
Cait's lips mimed “Stop that!”, but he winked at her and she shook her head in amusement.
-Well, thanks again guys for the interview. This last season of “Outalder” is definitely going to be memorable!- Leanne shook both of their hands -I’m so happy for you. And the fans love you too. We’re happy you’re happy!-.
The couple smiled back at her.
-Oh, everything's okay at home, right?-.
There they were. They had arrived at the crucial question of the interview. The one that “E! Entertainment Tonight” was longing for. The one that would appear in major news outlets. The one that everyone was waiting for, especially the fans.
Sam could sense the change in tone. His wife’s smile was forced. It had been just a hint, but he hadn’t missed it. He always noticed everything. Because she was his sunshine.
-We’re together and we work together, too. Most of the time, anyway- he admitted. There was no point in denying it or hiding it. In those eleven years, he and Cait had become friends, lovers, and finally family. Husband and wife for about five years.
They had made their relationship public at a delicate moment, but they had been adequately rewarded. The morbid attention of news-hungry fans and media and paparazzi had definitely dropped an octave knowing they were together and happy. After all, people gossip more about facts they don't know. By making the public aware of a small part of their relationship, they had helped to preserve and protect it.
Photos of their happy family life were rare on social media, but not absent; albeit with due precautions. Answers to questions like the one Leanne had just asked them were welcomed by both during interviews, as long as they were not insistent and oppressive. These little conceptions, and the fact that Sam had written his autobiography, had greatly quenched the general public's thirst for gossip and drama.
Sam had never revealed everything in the book. Of course. As usual. His private life remained completely private, as he had made known from the beginning. He and Cait were private, shy, cautious. Everything that was made public was meant for public consumption.
His wife and children were certainly not something to be thrown to public consumption.
It was up to him to respond and reiterate this.
-Well, you know, we’re together and we work together,- he tried to weigh every word. -And things are going great, everything’s fine. She’s… we’re just really busy these days.-
That was the most she would give, and Leanne was happy with that. She could read their body language to see that the Heughans were a happy couple.
It was tangible.
Sometimes it seemed to him that the media and the paparazzi, and even the fans, were just waiting for him to make a false move. One more word, a photographed argument splashed across the front page of some insipid tabloid, the slightest hint of a marital crisis.
But he and Cait were so much more than that.
They were a family. They had been each other's support system from the beginning.
He would walk through fire for her. He would die for her happiness and for their children. He wanted to see the smile that his wife was giving him every single day of his life.
And he would have done anything to continue to have her by his side.
Everything.

Ten minutes later Sam and Caitríona were walking hand in hand down the soundstage corridor.
Around them, set preparations for the eighth and final season of “Outlander” were in full swing. Filming had begun in March, about three months earlier, and since then it had been the usual hurricane of filming, photoshoots, casting calls, interviews, and red carpet events.
Between work, charity work, and everyday life, it was already complicated for them to find time together as a couple, but since the children arrived, everything had become even more complicated.
Sam could clearly feel that his wife was exhausted. Even though it was just lunchtime. She was tense under his touch. Her head was resting on his shoulder, almost leaning into him, almost seeking comfort.
Sam kissed her forehead, taking advantage of the fact that they were away from the cameras. He heard her sigh and pulled her even closer.
-Hey, Sam! Cait!-
Their fellow coworkers joined them. John, Richard and Sophie smiled at them.
“Will you join us for a drink?” Sophie asked kindly.
Sam glanced quickly at Cait, who nodded. But the dark circles under her eyes said otherwise. Caitríona had gotten up an hour earlier to serve breakfast to the kids, give them a bath, and let Sam go for his morning run around the neighborhood. Now it was Sam's turn to cuddle her a little and give her the attention she deserves. Only a few years ago, he and Cait would have dive into a happy hour with colleagues. But now everything was so different.
Wonderfully different. And the man wanted to savor every precious moment of it.
His wife patted him on the shoulder encouragingly. He looked into her eyes.
No. She was definitely tired and the man longed to spend a few hours alone with his wife. In peace and silence. And without interruptions of any kind.
-Sorry guys, but I promised my wife I'd take her out to lunch today. Marital duties-.
He kissed Caitríona on the cheek. His hold on her was firm.
Never stop holding her close. He said to himself. Never stop looking at me with that light in your eyes. That gentle look, full of love and devotion, of tenderness towards each other.
-And then we have to pick up the kids from school. We promised to take them to the Glasgow Botanic Gardens to feed the squirrels- she reminded him, hugging her friends.

Cumbernauld was only half an hour from Glasgow. It was a beautiful early June day: a rare sun warmed their faces and birds chirped in a cloudless blue sky.
The perfect date day. Just like the old days when they had to sneak into their trailers to beg for privacy, or they would run into each other between takes in the rain, cuddling for warmth. Quick, fleeting dates in hotel rooms, stolen kisses, nights spent watching old episodes of “Outlander” or whatever other dumb show was on TV, just to have an excuse to be in each other’s arms.
Caitríona started to walk towards their family car, an Audi, but Sam pulled her towards him and took her into his arms, kissing her in surprise and making her jump slightly.
-I was serious before Balfe… you know?-.
Sam bit his lip. Cait was lightly tanned and there in his arms, her breasts pressed against his chest and her breath hot on his neck. She was his. And the Scotsman knew all to well that his wife was aware of the effect her mere proximity had on him.
-Serious about what, Sammy Boy?- she teased. She smiled against his lips and kissed him again. Longer, letting their tongues wrestle with each other. She felt Sam press her against him and sigh.
-I love you- he said, between kisses. His hands inside her cotton T-shirt tickled her belly. Caitríona smiled and wrinkled her nose. If they had had time, her husband would have dragged her to the car and lowered the seats, but she knew that this was neither the right place nor the right time.
-I love you too-.
Their foreheads met. She closed her eyes, breathing in their scent. Pine aftershave, the whiskey that bore the nickname he called her. Like Jamie and Claire. Sassenach.
-About lunch Cait. I'm taking you out today. I promised you.- Sam put on his sunglasses and put his keys's car in the back pocket of his jeans.
-A week ago,- she teased. She couldn’t stop smiling. -You promised me we’d go to dinner, but then…-
-But then Maril put the interview with Josh Horowitz in there. And the week before that Lister got the flu and the week before that your mother…-
-Oh stop it Samwise!- she slapped him on the bottom and squealed when Sam lifted her up to his height to kiss her deeper.
Would it ever end? Would this constant, burning desire he felt for her ever end? This primal need to always have her in his arms to feel complete?
He didn't know. But he would do everything in his power to never let it go out.
Because she had given him completeness.
One last kiss and then Sam brought her down to earth and gently dragged her to the other side of the street, where a long row of restaurants and bistros were lined up. Cumbernauld's old town was smaller than Galsogow's and allowed them more privacy. The couple had only to walk the cobbled streets and choose a small bristot that seemed to suit them just right. Wooden exterior. Classic Scottish interior with wooden benches and tables full of splinters and history. Checkered floor. They sat at a small table, away from prying eyes. Hands on the table, still clasped together.
Sam took off his sunglasses. He clipped the ring to his wife's left ring finger.
The symbol to the world that she was his. And he was her. They belonged together.
Blood of my blood. Bone of my bones.
-Are you tired?- he asked, touching her cheek as if he was afraid he might break her.
Caitríona shrugged.
-Yes- she nodded -but I'm also relaxed, here with you. Just the two of us. It seems like forever since we've spent a few hours alone together. Well, except at work surrounded by a crew of twenty-.
He laughed.
-Ay, that's true. I would like to spend every minute of every day with you Cait-.
He looked straight into her eyes and felt the tension that had built up over the previous hours slowly disappear.
He could tell with a look when she was at her limit, when something was bothering her, or when she was sad or angry. His mission in life was to make her laugh. It had been that way since day one.
And she had completed it. She had given him two wonderful children, when he had always proclaimed himself an incurable single for life.
But now, with his hand clasped in his wife's, Sam cursed himself.
He had almost lost her. Years ago he had actually risked ruining their friendship and losing her forever.

At the beginning it all started almost as a game.
Their game.
Caitríona remembered it clearly: the first time she had met Sam was crystal clear in her memory.
The audition. Her extreme nervousness. Sam holding her tight.
Who the hell hugs an actor they just met?
The long walk in Hyde Park, where they talked about everything. Family, friends, interests, passions, dreams, work. They discovered they had the same philosophy of life, open and passionate. The same passions in common. They had both studied theater and loved animals. But the woman had also learned how different, yet complementary, she and Sam were. She loved baking, he barely knew how to heat up a plate of spaghetti. She loved relaxing in front of the fireplace with a good book, he trained to run marathons.
They had become friends. In fact, he had become her best friend. He made her laugh at every moment, he looked at her with tenderness. He cared about her. And it was natural for her to do the exact same things, to reciprocate all that attention.
Maybe it might have been too much for some. Gossips had always been there, after all.
Why couldn't a man and a woman become close friends? Why should there be something between them?
Of course people projected Jamie and Claire's whirlwind romance onto them.
But to her, Sam was just a friend.
There was an instant understanding that quickly transformed into a solid and lasting friendship.
Because Sam was an extraordinary human being. And anyone could see that. She saw the way women looked at him, wherever they went.
Even her cat, Eddie, was crazy about Sam. Cait had noticed the way her costar looked at her. The way Sam bit his lip when he held her. The long, passionate kisses Jamie gave Claire. Maybe a little too passionate, even for a seasoned actor. They had shared a trailer, he had introduced her to his mother who had raised him alone. She had invited him to Ireland to celebrate her birthday with her big family and old friends. They went to shows and concerts together. They spoke Gaelic for fun. Sam had even babysit Eddie for her a couple of times.
He had been professional though. He had clearly never made any shameless advances, especially in front of the cameras. They joked, they filtered, the man had made some insinuations about the size of her breasts. But nothing more.
And then Tony came along and changed the game.

-You're worse than children!-.
Sam stuck her tongue out at his wife. Their food orders had arrived: she had ordered a mixed salad of walnuts, feta cheese, and avocado. He had ordered steak and ketchup. Chips to share.
-If the kids find out, we’re done for!- he laughed. But we can bribe them with ice cream when we pick them up from school.-
The children had changed their relationship, but not completely. Gossips had written them off, more than once; but Caitríona was proud of their family. And of the life they had built together, day by day. She had always wanted to get married and have children. She knew that for Sam it had not been like that. He came from a divorced family, his father had never known him much or cared about him and his brother Cirdan. He had even put an ocean between them. She, on the other hand, came from a large and solid Irish family. Her parents had been for her the quintessence of the perfect marriage to inspire. And having grown up in a house with six children, she had always wanted to start a family.
And now she had done it.
She loved the man she married. Even though he ordered ketchup with every kind of meat, like their seven-year-old and three-year-old children. But Sam was incredibly devoted to all of them.
-Hey- her husband called her attention -you know you're the most beautiful woman in the world, right?-.
Cait blushed slightly, but nodded.
-And I thank God every day for making me meet you-
-Stop it!-
-But…- the Scotsman opened his arms in defense.
-You're stealing Jamie Fraser's lines, Samwise! Don't think I don't know that!-
Sam smirked.
-Come here.- His wife’s fingers brushed his face and a minute later she was wiping his face with a napkin. She was using the same devotion she used with their children and Sam felt his heart pound in his chest.
A shiver ran down his spine.
How long had it been since he and his wife had made love? Sure, just the day before yesterday they had a quickie in their bedroom, when the kids were busy playing with Legos in the living room. But half an hour with the woman he loved wasn't enough.
It never was.
-What are you thinking about?-
Sam's pupils turned black, filled with desire. He touched her wedding ring and smiled to himself.
-You know, we don't have to go back to Glasgow right away,- he said. -We can stop here for a couple of hours. The children won't be out until three o'clock, and I can text to my mother to come and get them. She's always complaining that she doesn't see them enough!-
Chrissie Heughan had moved from Edinburgh to Glasgow to be closer to her grandchildren. After all, her job as an artist allowed her to live as she pleased. And so Sam had bought her a house in Glasgow, just a few houses away from each other.
Caitríona bit her lower lip. She was thinking. She was thinking about it. She wanted to spend some time alone with her husband, too. She could see the fire of the Scottish Highlanders in Sam’s gaze.
He wanted her, it was clear.
But a promise was a promise.
-Sam, we promised the kids a walk and ice cream. You know that too-.
There was a special twinkle in her husband's eyes when she mentioned their children.
And it was the same sparkle in Caitríona's eyes, too.
Their children had completed them, had filled every part of their souls that still felt incomplete.
-You're right, ay- Sam hastened to reiterate. His thumb rubbed against the woman's knuckles. -As always, by the way, mo gràdh. But we can always make them run and play so much that tonight they'll collapse at eight on the dot. And then I'll have you all to myself-.
Cait laughed heartily, patting his chest.
-So this was your plan all along? - she joked.
-You can bet on it, Balfe-
-It's Heughan- she corrected him, smiling toothily.

She had almost not been Mrs. Heughan.
The woman tried to push away the shadows of the past, but it had really been a series of fortunate coincidences that she and Sam had begun dating as lovers and sweethearts, rather than just good friends.
By the end of 2014, in fact, they were just best friends. They were leaking and there were a few stolen kisses that were off-script; but they were still just friends.
And it was a woman's choice. She didn't want to mix work with her private life. It would have been too complicated.
But she really wanted to meet someone and commit to a serious relationship. Get married, have kids.
So, one of her best friends introduced her to Tony McGill, an Irish music producer.
They had gone out a couple of times and liked each other. Tony was polite, calm, extremely diligent and was an appreciated professional. Above all, he was reserved and very keen on protecting their privacy. He had rarely agreed to accompany her to events, unlike Sam who always found time to spend a few hours with her, despite their very busy schedules.
Tony was affable, Cait's parents liked him, and he was Irish.
They seemed like the perfect match. Sam had also been kind to Tony when she introduced them one January night in a Belfast pub.
They shook hands, laughed and joked, and drank a little too much. When they said goodbye, in front of the cars, Sam told her, “As long as it makes you happy, Cait, I’ll always support you.”
Sam had always been a true gentleman.
Tony was also kind and polite.
But despite that, the woman didn't feel that shiver in her chest every time she saw him or they were together. And then they started arguing. Little things of little importance swelled into endless arguments that left her exhausted.
They had lasted a year. Tony was jealous of the time Caitríona spent with Sam. She was intolerant of this jealousy. Her boyfriend had not fought for them, to show her that he loved her despite everything and everyone.
And then there was a huge fight.
And she showed up at Sam's house at three in the morning, in tears and with a blank look on her face.
They hadn't said anything.
There was no need for it.
The next day Tony had left and Sam had packed up all his clothes and moved into Caitríona's flat.
He didn't even have to ask her permission. He just did it.
It was like the stars had aligned. Sometimes it's just a matter of luck.
It had taken Sam all of two seconds to feel at home in the apartment that had once been exclusive Cait's.
The toothbrush next to her in the bathroom. The aftershave and body wash in the shower.
His laptop charging in her study.
The books on health and fitness that took their place in the mahogany bookcase, where she placed the classics of English literature with extreme care and devotion.
It had been so easy, so damn natural for both of them to carve out their home life. She lying on the couch, her head resting in Sam's lap.
His hands in her hair, her legs propped up on the coffee table. Eddie dozing next to them, not bothered at all by the Scotsman's cumbersome presence.
It was terrifying for Caitríona to admit this. For weeks she had been afraid to respond to his “I love yous,” because it meant surrendering to the inevitable.
Yet she knew that Sam was there for her. And that she would never, ever be alone again.
No one at work had been surprised when they revealed the news. In fact, Maril was thrilled and had practically encouraged them to take the next step and reveal their relationship to the world.
And the world went absolutely crazy when they both posted the same photo on their social media profiles. A kiss on the lips, in front of the Irish sunset at her parents' house.

The plates had been emptied. Sam had taken special care to wipe up the entire contents of the ketchup bowl with a piece of bread.
A quick glance at the clock.
-Ay! We'd better go get the kiddos-.
It was already two in the afternoon and the journey from Cumbernauld to Glasgow took half an hour, but they risked finding the roads clogged with commuter traffic. Cait paid the bill. With a nod the young waiter girl thanked them for choosing their restaurant for the romantic lunch. A selfie taken with the phone to please her.
Sam held the door open for his wife and then they walked together to the studio parking lot.
When they got into the car, the traces of the morning run were still clearly visible. In their Audi there was not a single space that had not been literally filled by the presence of their children.
And Sam and Caitríona were just fine with that.
The two child seats in the back. Cereal crumbs, a mashed banana on the left rear floor mat. Juice stains on the right one.
Their kids. Everything spoke about them. They were the humans beings Sam loved most in the world, even though before officially getting together with that extraordinary woman that was Caitríona, he hadn't really wanted a family or to be a father.
Cait had changed him. She had broadened his horizons.

When he first brought her to his mother's house, he was extremely nervous.
Chrissie had hugged them as soon as they walked in the door. She had cried for ten minutes, then bombarded them with questions. And she had insisted on showing Caitríona pictures of Sam as a baby, making him die of embarrassment.
The next week with Cirdan and Victoria and their son Finn had been no different. Cirdan had loved prodding Sam that he had finally had enough balls to ask Caitríona out on a real date.
And when Cait had put him on a plane bound for Tydavnet, Ireland, Sam had realized that he had now become the official boyfriend.
He had become part of a family he had not chosen, but who had welcomed him with open arms. James and Anne had been wonderful parents to Caitríona and her six brothers and sisters: Deirdre, Kevin, Anne-Marie, Francis, Lorraine and David.
Cait was the fourth child. And most of her siblings were married with children, so Sam found himself crowded at a table laden with all sorts of goodies, with at least thirty other people.
He had the distinct impression that everyone liked him. Jim continued to show interest in his politics views, his interest in his environment and the unusual way he had grown up; which clashed decidedly with the traditional Balfe background. Anne was constantly filling his plate with meat pies, roasts, potatoes and baked vegetables. Cait's sisters-in-law, Catherine and Cathy, were constantly joking about the confusion over their names and wanted to hear Sam recite out loud how his mother had named him and his brother after characters from "Lord of the Rings". The whole anecdote had caused everyone to laugh. And Sam had blushed to the tips of his ears, while Cait had squeezed his hand under the table. At the end of the meal, Cait's brothers and brothers-in-law, Paul and Shaun, had taken him aside and happily shared a top-shelf whiskey.
That, the Scotsman supposed, was actually their way of accepting him into the family. Even though he was surrounded by Irish.
The Balfe house was chaotic in a way that warmed Sam's heart. It was always noisy and he was never alone. Plus, all of Caitríona's nieces and nephews seemed inexorably drawn to him and his stories of his many previous jobs before becoming an actor.
For him, who had always only had his mother and his brother, that was heaven on earth.
And in the evening, in front of the bonfire that David had lit in the garden, surrounded by the Balfe siblings and his nephews and nieces, Sam had understood everything.
The woman he loved had a special light in her eyes when she was surrounded by children.
He wanted a child from her. He wanted to give her a child.
A baby who would be half him and half the woman he loved above all else.
And it would be wonderful, as only she could be. And it would grow up in a home surrounded by people who loved its unconditionally, full of laughter and joy.
And Sam would have been a good father. A present father.
It would be there every step of the way. Every fall.
Caitríona Balfe was his chance, his redemption.

Sam parked a few metres from the entrance to Glasgow St. Andrew Primary School Centre, the local public school where both of their children attend.
That had been another compromise between him and Caitríona.
They spent the working year with the children in Scotland. The public school was good, Sam's mother helped them with the children more than they could have wished. Cirdan was often at their home with his wife and son. But during the summer and winter holidays, as well as on every public holiday, the Heughans took the plane and landed on Irish soil where they were surrounded by the large Balfe family.
-That wasn’t so bad, we’re a good three minutes early- Caitríona cheered. The woman lowered the mirror and checked her face.
-Don't redo your makeup- Sam's voice came warm and soft in Cait's ear. The man's hands were immediately on her face and his lips on her. -No need, you're always beautiful, Mo nighean donn-.
“Flatterer,” she smiled.
When they reached the entrance, their son was standing on the sidewalk, pushing his way through his classmates, looking for them.
As soon as he saw them, the child ran straight to his parents. Arms wide open and a proud look.
-Mom! Dad!-.
He leapt into Sam's arms, who caught him and twirled him in the air before holding him close. Caitríona was between them, tenderly stroking her eldest son's strawberry blond hair.

It hadn't even been necessary to try to have a child.
Caitríona had gotten pregnant right away. And the very day she told Sam, he had cried and given her an engagement ring.
Allister James Heughan was born on December 7, 2017. Sam insisted on giving his son a Scottish name, a warrior name. Allister meant “defender of men and protector of love.”
Of their love. That child had been born at the right time, suitable for him, according to the inclinations of both parents. Allister had defended them and protected them from the media and the various gossip regarding the beginning of their relationship. Getting together and conceiving a child within a year, was not very common. Above all, it was certainly not well regarded in their work environment. The child had protected their love, when not even they believed so firmly in it.
His middle name, James, was not given in honour of Jamie Fraser, as fans and the media had speculated; but for Big Jim, Caitríona's dad.
When they brought him home that first night, they had been awake, too busy basking in the sight of the baby, cuddled against his mother's chest.
They were obsessed. Allister was the perfect mix of the two of them. He got his reddish-blond hair from his dad, as well as the square features of his face, the slightly protruding ears and the hands with long fingers. He got his nose, his thin lips, the shape and shade of blue of his eyes from his mom.
Lister was an angel. Calm, quiet and peaceful, he was a pleasure to be around. He was a thoughtful person by nature. Cait was relieved to see how well-mannered her son was. As a child, she was a scamp. Instead, Allister made himself loved by everyone. They could easily take him on set or backstage for interviews and he could entertain himself for hours playing with Lego or leafing through a book.
A year and a half after Allister's birth Cait and Sam had went to Glasgow City Council and become Mr and Mrs Heughan.
No grand ceremony. No official announcement. They had invited only close friends and relatives to the wedding. And the fans and the media found out after the fact, noticing the wedding rings.
Lister had filled their lives for nearly three years before Cait suggested to her husband that they could try for a second child.
After all, she had just turned forty-one and it was a borderline age. She wanted to give Lister a little brother or sister to play with. She loved being part of a large family, having siblings to share her life with. She wanted the same for her child. Covid 19 and the quarantine had made things easier for her, since she and Sam had been forced to take a break from work and could actively try to achieve their goal without too many calculations, being always stuck at home.
Astrid Chrissie Heughan was born on May 12, 2021. Sam had cried so hard when the doctor told him he was going to be the father of a baby girl. With Lister his chest had swelled with pride, but Astrid had melted his heart.
He was as close to her and her brother as he had ever been. The name Astrid had been Catriona's choice, meaning "divinely beautiful." And giving the baby the middle name Chrissie, after Sam's mother, seemed right.
The little girl had come into the world in a few hours and had immediately revealed herself to be the worthy heir of her mother. She had a strong and determined character and her father and brother were wrapped aroud her tiny fingers. It wasn't that difficult, given that with her blond curls and her big blue eyes she clearly resembled her mother. Astrid had always kept her father tightly in her grasp.

-You’re not late this time- Lister complimented, as Sam set him down on the floor.
His left hand held his father's, his right hand held Cait's.
-Are you ready mate?- Sam asked, and he and Cait lifted their boy into the air, making him giggle like when he was just a little kid.
-I got an A on my animal science test- Lister informed them, once his feet had touched the ground again.
His parents looked at each other for a second, proud faces.
-All this intelligence comes from your mom’s family- Sam reminded him.
When they entered the preschool's class to pick up Astrid, the little girl was already standing at attention in the hall and immediately broke free from the teacher's arms to go towards her brother and squeeze him into a crushing hug.
-You've gotten heavier than yesterday!- he teased her and Astrid kissed the tip of his brother's nose.
Sam and Cait held hands. The woman noted with mild displeasure that her daughter's teacher lingered too long on her husband's face and muscles.
But she was Mrs. Heughan. She trusted Sam blindly, but she didn't trust the rest of the people.
Astrid staggered on her little legs and crashed straight into her father's. He quickly picked her up and threw her into the air, causing the little girl to let out a series of squeals of excitement.
Caitríona sighed, waiting her turn to greet her daughter.
Astrid and Sam were always on each other's backs. Allister was more diplomatic, on the other hand.
-How was your day, love?- the woman stroked the little girl's blond curls and her daughter threw her arms around her neck, while not letting go of her father.
-Good!- she shrieked, clapping her hands. Then she pointed to the front door. -Ice cream!- she shouted.
Sam laughed.
-Well, you have a good memory too, Miss Astrid!-.
They said goodbye to the teachers and headed for the car. Allister holding hands with Caitríona, Astrid still in Sam's arms.

It was a Friday afternoon and the Glasgow Botanic Gardens were bustling with families with children out for a walk and feeding the ducks, young people exercising on the exercise machines, teenagers simply lazing in the sun and tourists exploring the various flowerbeds.
The good weather and the air of the approaching summer spread spores of good humor in every corner.
Glasgow had never seemed so alive.
No one paid attention to them. They seemed like a family like many others.
As soon as the children spotted the ducklings in the pond, they let go of their parents and ventured to the shore of the great black lake.
Caitríona and Sam were unable to let go, however. His thumb touched her wedding ring, and Cait stood on tiptoe to kiss his forehead.
She knew how much that family serenity meant to her husband.
She knew how much they had fought to get everything that was now in front of their loving eyes.
Two brilliant careers. One family. The children.
They chose a random spot in the large lawn. A small patch of shade, courtesy of two large, sturdy oaks. Caitríona barely had time to spread out a plaid blanket before Sam's arms were around her waist and, in two seconds, she was beneath him. His hot breath tickling her neck, one hand on her breast, the other on her face. His lips on hers.
-I've been waiting to do this since that damned interview- Sam whispered.
Cait grinned. Evidently her husband had not completely given up on that idea from a few hours earlier.
-You’ll have to be patient then - she teased him. Another kiss. Their noses bumped and she wrinkled it.
It was adorable.
Sam grimaced back. Cait's hand rested on his heart, where she was inexorably present.
-Just one kiss, darling. Just one that will allow me to get to tonight without touching you in an ambiguous way in front of the bairns-.
The woman rolled her eyes. She cupped his chin in her hands and obliged, also giving him a pat on the butt and receiving a gasp in response.
They were like two teenagers on a first date. Before giving him a chance, the Irishwoman had sincerely feared that trying to go out with Sam and giving in to his exhausting requests for a date would mean putting their friendship, their sincere and deep bond, at stake.
But, she was wrong.
Their love was a winning bet, as Jamie Fraser loved to repeat to his Claire.
Nothing is lost, Sassenach; only changed.
Sam propped himself up on his elbows, looking around nervously.
The peace of Scotland played in their favor.
He quickly reversed their positions and made her lie down on top of him.
Cait's laughter.
How many times had he already made her laugh on that special day? He had lost count, but it didn't matter.
His wife's clothes were stained with the last of the dead leaves, and he made sure to get them off her. Sam bent his arms and put his hands behind his head. From that position he could see what his children were up to.
He closed his eyes and sighed. Cait held him close. She was at peace.
It didn't last long though.
“Oh Lord!” Caitríona exclaimed and sat up, reluctantly abandoning her previous position. “Lister? What the hell have you done?”
-But it's not my fault, Mom! - the little boy's breathless voice made the woman smile halfway.
-We were watching the ducklings on the shore and Astrid leaned over to throw them a blade of grass-
Sam struggled to hold back a laugh.
Oh, well, as if the fat ducks of Scotland were fighting among themselves for a single blade of grass!
-And she slipped! Not a lot, just a little… like that… like that… I did what Daddy always says- the son tried to justify himself. A glimmer of hope in his sky-blue eyes. -And I acted like a responsible older brother and went in and told her to stop-.
The boy's jeans were soaked with water, as were the sleeves of his sweatshirt. Behind him, his little sister was struggling; Astrid, on the other hand, had her entire denim jacket soaked with water. Mud on her white canvas shoes that had been a gift from her aunt Anne-Marie.
-We were just on the shore!- Allister muttered.
-Oh, well your father will surely have something to say about that. Isn't that right, Sam? - Caitríona's eyebrows were arched and pointed directly at him.
-Oh, ay my boy- Sam rolled up the sleeves of his son's sweatshirt, while his wife took care of the little girl.
-Your sister is too young, Lister. I told you to keep an eye on her. You should have gone in the wood and given the nuts I bought you to the squirrels. Don't try to get caught by silly ducks. And look here, your mother and I are working to buy you clothes, mister. Do you understand?-
Allister stared at the checked tablecloth.
Sam's heart sank. Contrary to what he would have liked to admit, he had turned out to be a strict father, even if Cait was the most feared parent; however, especially towards his firstborn as a male Sam wanted to instill good morals and education from the beginning. To someone else it might have seemed silly, even too premature; but to him who had been looking for a father figure for years, it made perfect sense.
-Good- Caitríona turned her son around, as if to check the damage count.
-And you, young lady- the woman interjected, pinching Astrid's nose, who let out a high-pitched shriek and made her brother smile. -Your father is physically incapable of scolding you, Astrid Chrissie, but I remind you that I have told you at least a thousand times not to jump into every puddle or swamp that appears in front of you. Your brother can't always have your back-.
A half smile appeared on Allister's face. He knew his parents weren't really mad about him and Astrid getting their clothes dirty.
-And now your father and I will keep our promise- the woman reached into her purse and pulled out two five pound bills. She had started collecting duplicates of the same exact bills because, as she had learned the hard way, it was practically impossible for two siblings to split a bill in two.
-Ice cream!- Astrid shouted, raising her arms in the air, and her brother immediately followed suit.
That little girl sure had a lot of energy.
-You're a lovely scamp! Just like your mother! - Sam kissed his daughter's curly head and Astrid immediately raised her arms to be picked up on his shoulders.
-Dad! Up!-.
-Hey!- his wife glared at him.
-Those are your mother's words, not mine!- Sam laughed, shrugging.
-Can we really have ice cream?- Lister asked, just to make sure the situation was true. Cait nodded and the boy kissed the knuckles of his mother’s right hand, in perfect imitation of his father.
Caitríona's heart skipped a beat.
Allister and Sam were so alike. Inside out.
Wasn't that her giant Scottish husband who was kneeling down to let their little girl hand the ice cream cart clerk her money? The same man who loved playing tea party with his nices or who was never afraid to cry in front of their son, showing him every day how a real man should behave.
God, she was damn lucky. Wasn't it wonderful to share a destiny? To share the same house?
Their home.
The sun was now setting in the west, casting a soft orange light on the trees and people.
Most of Astrid's ice cream cone had ended up on her face and clothes. A sure sign that that denim jacket outfit could take a one-way trip to the washing machine. Allister, on the other hand, had been the perfect gentleman and had offered several spoonfuls of his ice cream to his mother, under the proud and ever-vigilant gaze of Sam.

-What are you reading, Mo ghràdh?-
When Sam returned to the bedroom after putting the children to sleep, his wife was already under the sheets wearing only a floral robe and her reading glasses. Sam could see that Caitríona was completely engrossed in her reading. Her brow was furrowed slightly, her eyes were half closed, and she was biting her lower lip.
It had been a perfect day.
After the park and ice cream they had gone home as it was getting dark. Caitríona had cooked salmon and asparagus. They had bathed the children and then Sam had told them stories of the Wee Folks until Allister and Astrid had collapsed into their respective beds.
Now there was only one last action to complete.
The man sneered, crippling every moment of what he was about to do.
Cait always had her eyes glued to the pages of Isabel Allende's “The Japanese Lover.”
The man sat down on the mattress at the foot of the bed. Only when the bed shook did his wife barely look up.
-The children?- she asked almost absentmindedly.
-They've sunk into dreamland- Sam leaned over and kissed her on the lips. She smiled and took off her glasses.
Sam’s blue eyes shone in the dim light of the room.
He saw Caitríona's face change expression and a mischievous smile appeared on her face.
Now she understood. Cait pulled her husband towards her, kissing him passionately.
-And will I be good enough to convince you to finish reading your precious book tomorrow?-
-Oh well- Caitríona allowed her husband’s tongue to enter her mouth. Now she was struggling with her own and Sam’s hands to slip inside her light summer nightgown.
She was cold. Sam hands served to protect her from the Scottish cold. A brisk breeze came in through the window, full of the promise of rain.
The book was now forgotten, on the parquet floor of the bedroom.
One of Cait’s hands slipped into the crack of her husband's boxers, caressing him and making him moan.
-Shhh, you'll wake up the children-
-Dinna fas, Cait-. The sentence died in his throat, when his wife's delicate hands tightened along his member.
He had wanted her since that morning. First at the studios and then at the park. And she had promised him that. He had waited long enough.
What the hell! He was done with being quite. He wanted her and he wanted her right then.
His wife returned the kiss, but then put both hands on his face and looked at him seriously.
She did it often. Sam knew very well the ritual question her love was about to ask him. -You love me, right? We love each other and…-
Sam muffled Caitríona's sentence with his own lips.
“Sam…” she begged. Now with one hand the man was stimulating her right nipple, with the other he was trying to open her legs. He didn’t have the energy to resist and get lost in foreplay. Not tonight. And he knew Cait loved it when he took her in that urgent and insatiable way, as if they had just gotten together the other day.
-Samwise Roland…- the woman tightened her knees and tried to block the man's fingers, but Sam was, obviously, bigger than her.
However, he agreed to stop for a moment to answer her, as she had requested.
-We love each other… yes- he lifted her robe and kissed her belly. The scar from Astrid’s most recent labor and delivery always made his eyes watery.
He didn't know why Caitríona often sought confirmation of his love. But he always responded with the same devotion and ardor as always.
They loved each other.
He certainly would never have broken her heart.
Not in that place, in their bed.
Not now, not ever.
-Damn- the woman's skilled fingers had already pulled the Scotsman's shirt off -hold me Sam or I swear on…-.
The man smiled against the woman's delicate skin. He blew on Cait's flat abdomen and bit it gently, causing Caitríona to arch her back, shaking with pleasure.
She wanted to feel safe and secure. If that was what his wife was asking for, he would surely oblige.
As always.
He leaned on his elbows and allowed Cait to sit up. He ran his hands through her hair, breathing in the scent. She smelled of fresh herbs, nuts, and ice cream now. His fingers were in her dark curls. Their breaths became labored. Their moans were muffled. They were about to untangle the remaining clothes when…
-Daddy…-.
The couple froze.
-Daddy!- Astrid’s shrill voice erupted down the corridor, followed by the sound of light footsteps toward their door.
-Christ!-.
Sam barely had time to pull away from his wife when Astrid's curly blonde head peeked out from the front door.
The unruly curls framed the little girl's worried expression. In one hand she clutched Lambert, her stuffed lamb.
-Honey- Cait hastily adjusted her nightgown over her mostly exposed breasts.
-What's happening? I thought your father told you to close your eyes. He was in your room for half an hour-.
Sam stared at her in annoyance.
The sound of thunder, above their heads, made everyone present jump.
A summer storm. Unexpected and quite as violent as Scotland itself.
Here, the mystery is revealed.
Astrid didn't even answer but slipped towards the master bed. With one hand she clung to her mother's neck, near her breast to seek reassurance.
-It's raining- salty tears streamed down the little girl's face as Caitríona held her close, covering her with the sheets and allowing her daughter to come between her and Sam.
-Why don't you try to go back to your room, sweetie?- the father tried -I'll tell you the story of the fairy queen and…-
Sam didn't even finish the sentence.
His daughter looked at him with her deep dark blue eyes. Pleading for love and protection. He certainly couldn’t deny her comfort. He had never had a father to go to for refuge. Sexual desire or not.
The man sighed and rose from the bed, gently taking his little daughter in his arms. He looked out the central window of the master bedroom. The large glass window that the couple had wanted in their room looked out onto the green Scottish plains, some lonely villa on the moors. The sky above them was dark and threatening, but in her father's strong arms Astrid knew she was safe.
-Look love, there's a nice summer storm coming- he explained with an expert air.
They were such a sweet sight that Cait thought about joining them. Then a second presence made her turn.
It was Lister.
-No… I’m not afraid- the boy immediately asserted, but his eyes fixed on the floor told another story. He looked down, embarrassed. His ears turned a shade of red, making his hair stand out. -But if Astrid sleeps there with you, then…-.
Both Caitríona and Sam detected a slight hint of panic in their eldest son’s voice. The lightning was illuminating the room, and the first drops of rain were beginning to fall on the windows and roof.
-Jump in- Cait encouraged his son, making room for him in the bed. -After all, your father and I were about to fall asleep. Right, Sam?-.
The Scotsman shook his head, amused.
His wife certainly knew how to make him beg. And God, he was crazy about that quality of her.
-Ay, sure. What else were we supposed to do, eh Sasseanch? You know, I think we'd have time to pick up where we left off tomorrow morning-.
He closed the window and felt his daughter's body shiver from the cold sensation she had just experienced. He reached the bed and leaned down to kiss his wife. Their lips barely touched and Astrid pushed Cait's face away.
-No, daddy is only mine!- squeaked the little girl.
Lately, having to share her husband with her daughter as well as the rest of the world made the woman both smile and scream.
-Well, you know, we can always share him- Lister suggested, waving the stuffed lamb in front of his little sister's face to distract her.
“Bedtime, kids, come on.” Caitríona encouraged Astrid with a light pat on the bottom and the little girl nestled, of course, between her and Sam. Lister snuggled up to Caitríona’s other side, wrapping his arms around her waist. The boy little head resting on her mother’s belly, where it once belonged.
“Goodnight, guys,” Sam whispered, closing his eyes.

The next morning the rain showed no signs of letting up. Sam listened to it, staring up at the room’s wood-beamed ceiling.
It always relaxed him to listen to the pitter-patter of raindrops.
He shifted his gaze to look at the other occupants of the enormous king-size bed that he remembered well he had wanted to buy. The enviable size of the bed had certainly not been chosen to have the whole family sleep in it.
Astrid had her curls tangled up on his dad chest. The little girl’s eyes were closed, her mouth open. The thumb of her right hand was lightly in her mouth. Lambert the lamb had ended up under Sam's left hip, and that explained his back pain.
Cait was sleeping in the fetal position, with Allister curled up next to her. Their faces close together, facing Astrid and Sam.
She was the sweetest thing he had ever known.
Sam felt a tingling sensation in his chest as he thought back to the night before, to the way his wife had held him close, when the lights go low; before they were interrupted by the children.
Shakes his soul like a pothole every time. Cait took his heart upon a one way trip, guess she went wandering off with it.
None like most women Sam know.
This one will bring it back whole.
She hadn't been like any of the majority of women he know.
She had turned him upside down and at the same time put him right back again.
Lister was snoring softly next to his mother. His head nestled just below the crook of Caitríona's neck. His arms were still tightly wrapped around the woman's waist, as if he wanted to be as close to her as possible. The boy's strawberry blond hair was disheveled. His eyes were half closed, blue sparks appearing every time he blinked them in a state of half-sleep.
Even Gandalf, the family's young grey tabby cat, had curled up on his mistress's pillow and was purring in symbiosis with Cait's.
Sam smiled to himself.
When had his life surprised him like this? Sometimes he still struggled to realize it, to surrender to the sweet thought that the people who were there, in that bed with him, belonged to him.
And that he was fused with them. Bound together by an invisible and indivisible string.
The digital alarm clock on his nightstand was on five-twenty. He'd better get up if he wanted to run around the neighborhood for half an hour. Then he'd let Caitríona and the kids rest a little longer; they all needed it, especially his wife. Dark circles of tiredness were still visible under the woman's eyes.
Maybe he could even surprise her and make her breakfast in bed: avocado toast with a poached egg and pink pepper, hot black coffee. He would take the kids to school. He almost always did that because he knew Cait hated getting up early in the morning.
And then she was always so damn busy.
A meow told him that Gandalf had woken up and was calling for his attention. The young cat pawed at the man's chest and Sam scratched him under the chin.
What would Samwise have said ten years ago?
What would he have said about the past? To know that now he had everything he had never even had the ardor to desire.
He had defeated fate.
He was just a shy kid with a mother who had fought for years with Social Security just to buy him a pair of glasses.
Sam had filled his life with a thousand roles: he had been a waiter in an Edinburgh bar, a biker and a delivery boy, a clerk at Harrod's, a drama student, a traveler, a dreamer with many dreams in his pocket and no certainty about tomorrow.
But nothing would ever reach the perfection of that moment, him close to the people he loved.
-Hey- his wife’s voice came to him loudly, even though it was barely a whisper.
Caitríona’s eyes were still puffy with tiredness, but she was smiling. She reached out a hand to him and Sam kissed it softly. A look full of love.
-Sleep, now beannachd. I'll take care of everything today-.
The man slowly stood up, depositing Astrid from his chest into her mother's arms.
The woman's eyes smiled at him and her lips mimed a “Thank you!” before she lay back down in the oblivion of sleep.
Sam stood up and walked barefoot toward the door. Gandalf scampered happily behind him.
Before heading to the kitchen he took one last look at his family.
To his world.
He and Cait had come a long way, not without obstacles, to get to where they were now. They had failed and started again, together.
Sometimes it was just luck. Sometimes the stars were perfectly alienated.
And Sam thanked life every single day for that.
For his wife and children.
Hugged and held together.
Forever.