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Chapter Text

Joey Baines - The Original Timeline

Chapter 1: June 24, 1972

"Biff, I'm surprised you're involved with this." Skinhead commented. "Don't you make big bucks at your workplace?"

"Hello? Hello?" Biff angrily asked and started beating Skinhead's head with his knuckles. "Anybody home? Think, Skinhead. Think. I need the Irish bug, George McFly, to do my work for me or I'll be fired. You don't want it to happen, do you?"

"N-no, Biff." Skinhead fearfully said.

"With my share of the loot, I'll be closer to an early retirement and, once I no longer need a job, I'll finally rescue Lorraine from McFly without having to worry about him retaliating by refusing to do my work." Biff explained his plan.

"Lorraine never wanted you, Biff." Match commented, prompting Skinhead and 3-D to back away in fear.

"What did you just say?" Biff asked with an expression that suggested Match would replace George as Biff's personal punching bag.

Match was trying to stammer an answer when Joey Baines showed up, interrupting them. 'Saved by the bell.' Match thought in relief.

"So, what's the score?" Joey asked.

"Joey, do you remember how Doctor Brown's mother withdrew 85 thousand dollars from the bank after the crash?" Biff asked.

"Yes." Joey eagerly answered.

"Well, Brown burned down his family's mansion for the insurance so we know she didn't give him that money." Biff explained his reasoning. "We'll break into her home and take that dough for ourselves."

"Wait a minute." Joey protested. "How do you know she still has all that cash at home after all those years? She might have deposited it back into the bank."

"I know she still keeps that cash at her home because Match's cousin knew a guy whose brother worked at the bank and he said the money never went back into her account." Biff explained.

Once that was settled, Biff's gang and Joey went to Mrs. Ellsworth's (Doc's Mom remarried after his father's death) house. Under the belief she hid the cash in some cigar box, they were looking for it. "Found it." Skinhead whispered.

Biff smiled at this until he noticed Joey picking some painting. "What do you think you're doing, butthead?" Biff asked Joey.

"Just taking a souvenir, Biff." Joey answered while the other burglars left.

"Are you stupid?" Biff asked. "We already got what we wanted. Drop it."

"No." Joey defiantly replied.

"I told you to drop it." Biff insisted and tried to pull the painting away from Joey. As a result, Joey got a piece of the painting while Biff got most of it and the whole frame.

To their surprise, the two of them were spotted by Doc Brown, who was at the house to help his mother moving back to Hill Valley after his stepfather's death. Biff was quick to use the painting to block his face from Doc's view. Because Doc's dog barked at the robbers' presence, Mrs. Ellsworth had already called the cops and, while Biff and his gang still escaped, Joey was caught.

Back at Biff's home, he and his gang were upset upon learning the cigar box was empty. "All that trouble for nothing?" 3-D asked in frustration.

"Not necessarily." Biff replied while smirking. "Lorraine is probably suffering with the news of her brother's arrest." He then noticed something at the painting. "And the 85 thousand dollars aren't out of reach yet."

That caught his gang's attention. "What?" They asked.

"The painting has a map." Biff said. "Mrs. Ellsworth hid her cash somewhere. Probably wouldn't trust her son after his insurance scam."

"Where is it?" Match eagerly asked.

"I don't know." Biff replied while showing the incomplete map. "Joey took a piece of it."

"We're not waiting until Joey Baines leaves prison, are we?" Skinhead asked, wondering if Biff was that stubborn.

"Of course not." Biff answered. "We'll just follow Mrs. Ellsworth. With her map stolen and her son having informed her that there was a thief other than Joey, she'll probably move the cash from her hiding spot."

"Not worth it, Biff." 3-D replied as he and the rest of the gang left.

"More loot for me." Biff told himself.

June 25, 1972

It was a Sunday morning and, as usual, Biff Tannen was sleeping in. As unusual, an unexpected visitor interrupted his sleep. "McFly, how many times must I tell you not too soon..." Biff started ranting until he got over his initial assumption it was George knocking at the door. 'Did Joey tattle?' He wondered in fear. Taking a peek through the window, Biff was relieved (and pleased) to learn that it was George's wife Lorraine at his door. "Lorraine, how can I help you?" Biff asked, hoping she's leaving George for him.

"Biff, it's so horrible!" Lorraine said between tears. "My brother Joey is in jail."

"What?" Biff asked, feigning shock. "How could this happen?"

"Joey broke into Mrs. Ellsworth's house to steal the 85 thousand dollars she was rumored to keep at home." Lorraine sadly answered.

"Do you need help with bail or some other thing?" Biff asked, eager to have an excuse to be the one to get Joey out of jail.

"The officers said Joey cannot be bailed out until a judge sets bail, which cannot happen until tomorrow, Biff." Lorraine replied. "Unfortunately, Mrs. Ellsworth's son, Doctor Brown, said Joey had an accomplice and the police said that, because Joey refuses to disclose the accomplice's identity, it's unlikely the judge will allow him to bail out. Could you please talk some sense into him? Joey won't listen to George or me."

"Lorraine, I can talk to him but I can't promise he'll listen to me." Biff stated.

"That's all I can ask." Lorraine replied.

"Isn't George here with you?" Biff asked, surprised that she came alone.

"I told him I was visiting Joey." Lorraine answered. "I didn't say how long I'd stay out."

"I like that about you, Lorraine." Biff commented. "Let's go."

Together, the two of them went to the jail to visit Joey Baines, who was surprised that Biff was there. "Biff, what're you doing here?" Joey asked out of worry.

"Your sister asked me to come and try to convince you to inform your accomplice's identity." Biff answered while chuckling. "Of course, I don't expect you to actually do that but I had to try for appearances' sake."

"Don't worry, Biff." Joey said. "I'm not telling."

"Good." Biff replied. "Now excuse me while I tell you sister the 'bad' news."

After their conversation ended, Biff talked to Lorraine. "I'm sorry, but Joey refuses to say who was with him."

"I should have known he'd end up like that." Lorraine sadly commented. "As a baby, he made a fuss whenever somebody tried to take him out of his playpen. "What do I tell the kids? Especially Marty."

"Tell them he tried to steal a million dollars." Biff suggested. "It's more impressive than 85 thousand and it's the amount of money you said you wouldn't be my girl even if I had it."

"That's not time for jokes, Biff." Lorraine said and angrily left, oblivious to the fact he's glad she still had some spunk.

Biff then went home and readied himself for tomorrow.

June 26, 1972

As George McFly showed up at work, his supervisor Biff Tannen eagerly approached him. "George, any news about Joey?" He asked with barely contained joy. "Lorraine was so distraught when she asked for my help."

"She went to you?" As Biff expected, George didn't know.

"I guess she wanted a real man to help her." Biff commented and then thought about something. "Hey, George, your shoe's untied."

"Is it?" George asked while directing his sight to his shoes, prompting Biff to react as usual whenever George fell for that trick.

"Don't be so gullible, McFly." Biff said and then noticed other workers looking at them. "What're you looking at, buttheads?"

End chapter

Chapter Text

Chapter 2: 1986

Joey Baines finally got his parole and his nephew Martin "Marty" McFly was now trying to find out what he was sent to prison for but it wasn't easy since everyone he asked either refused to answer or knew no more than he did. Out of desperation, Marty went to his father's workplace. "Marty, shouldn't you be at school?" George McFly asked.

"Dad, it's four PM." Marty answered.

"In that case, how can I help you?" George eagerly asked.

"Dad, what did Uncle Joey do to be sent to jail?" Marty asked, making his father even more nervous.

"M-Marty, that's a very delicate subject." George answered.

"What's going on, buttheads?" George and Marty suddenly heard the former's supervisor, Biff Tannen, ask.

"I'm just asking my Dad about Uncle Joey." Marty answered while glaring at Biff.

"Jailbird Joey?" Biff asked in disdain. "What's with the sudden interest?"

"Because he was released and nobody wants to tell me what he was in prison for, Tannen." Marty answered and Biff's reaction to this was something Marty never thought he would see from the grown-up bully. Fear and shock.

"I-i-i-is he free?" Biff asked upon recovering from the shock.

"Yes, and I want to know why he was in prison, Biff." Marty confirmed.

"Long story short, your Uncle tried to steal 85 thousand dollars from Dr. Brown's mother." Biff bluntly answered. "Now that you know, make like a tree and get out of here."

'More than 30 years and he still says it wrong.' George thought, ashamed of himself for not having the courage to correct Biff.

'It's "leave", Biff.' Marty thought but wouldn't say anything either. "Fine, I'll get out of here."

After Marty left, he went to Doc Brown's home. "Marty, how can I be of assistance? Doc asked.

"Doc, I've got word on what Uncle Joey did to go to prison." Marty said. "Sorry."

"Marty, you're not one to be held responsible for the events of June 24, 1972." Doc tried to comfort his friend. "The only one other than Joey Baines is his accomplice."

"He had an accomplice?" Marty asked in shock.

"Yes, Marty." Doc answered. "I've witnessed it with my own sense of sight. Unfortunately, the accomplice pilfered a portrait of my mother and held it in a way that prevented me from noticing his facial features."

"Anyway, Doc, if you want, I could help you to recover the stolen loot." Marty volunteered.

"Marty, your concern is appreciated yet unnecessary." Doc replied. "They never located the money's hiding place."

Meanwhile, at the McFly household, Lorraine and Joey were having a conversation. "Lorraine, what's wrong with Marty?" Joey asked. "Out of your kids, he's the one who most liked me."

"He felt hurt." Lorraine asked. "And that's because he doesn't know who you stole from."

"What difference would it make?" Joey asked. "What does Marty have to do with Mrs. Ellsworth?"

"He works as her son's assistant, Joey." Lorraine answered. "Most people who don't know the details of your crime think Dr. Brown's reputation was the main reason George and I were reluctant about allowing Marty to be his assistant but our real fear was Dr. Brown holding your crime against Marty."

"I'm sorry, Lorraine." Joey said.

The phone then rang. "Excuse me." Lorraine told her brother and then answered the call. "Hello."

"Lorraine, it's me, Geroge." George said from the caller's side.

"George, what happened?" Lorraine asked, hoping her husband finally got the promotion he deserved ar at least a raise.

"Biff said he's going to have dinner at our house." George answered. "He wants to celebrate Joey's release."

"Biff?" Lorraine asked in disapproval. "And you said yes?"

"Lorraine, Biff is my supervisor." George pleaded.

"He wouldn't if you didn't let him force you to do his work while he takes the credit, George." Lorraine angrily replied.

"I'm sorry, Lorraine." George meekly replied and the call ended.

"Biff?" Joey asked. "Are you talking about Biff Tannen?"

Realizing she aired her grievances in front of her brother, Lorraine told Joey about how Biff was making a hell of her family's life through the latest 30 years. "What a scoundrel." Joey commented, regretting he ever looked up to Biff.

That night, Biff arrived at the McFly's home. "George, have you finished the reports?" Biff asked.

"Do you mean the reports you should be working on, Biff?" Joey asked, revealing his presence and shocking Biff with his current size. "You won't like what I'll do if I catch you pushing your work into my brother-in-law, will you?"

"Go, Uncle Joey." Marty whispered in approval.

After that confrontation, Lorraine served dinner. "So, Joey, any plans for the future?" Lorraine asked, hoping he'd stay around until George grew a spine and stood up to Biff.

"Hopefully Lou's Cafe needs help." Joey commented.

"It's Lou's Aerobic Fitness Center now, Uncle Joey." Marty's sister Linda McFly replied.

"Either way, I must show I've paid my debt to society." Joey said.

"Easier said than done, Joey." Biff commented while placing a note into Joey's hand without anyone else noticing.

After everyone ate dinner and dessert, Biff Tannen readied himself to leave. "Lovely evening, Lorraine." He commented. "I can't wait for the next time."

"Goodbye, Biff." Marty said. "Out of all times you visited us, this was by far my favorite."

If not for Uncle Joey's presence, Biff would've called Marty a "butthead". The bully instead chose to quietly leave. A few minutes later, he was at a spot where the letter instructed Joey to meet him. "So, what do you want, Biff?" Joey asked his former "accomplice".

"Joey, do you still have your piece of Mrs. Ellsworth's painting?" Biff asked.

"Yes." Joey answered. "And I figured out why you'd ask."

"I have the rest of the map, Joey." Biff said. "We can find where she hid her 85 thousand dollars and then we'll split in half."

"What about Match, Skinhead and 3-D?" Joey asked. "Are we double-crossing them?"

"Those buttheads got themselves off the deal because they didn't want to wait for you to leave jail. That loot is ours and ours only." Biff said, unaware that somebody was eavesdropping on their conversation.

"Alright, but once we're done you'll quit your job and suggest your boss gives it to George." Uncle Joey demanded.

"Deal." Biff replied, not really intending to fulfill that part of the agreement.

The next night, Biff and Joey went to the remote área the map led to. "Mrs. Ellsworth's money!" Biff exclaimed. "It's all mine!"

"What?" Joey asked, feeling outraged. "We had a deal!"

Biff then drew a weapon. "Deal's over, butthead. Did you really think I'd let you get away with insulting me? If you did, you're not only dumb but also mute. Once I kill you, not only I'll keep the whole 85 thousand for myself but also be free to keep McFly doing my work for me."

"Biff, the cops will match the bullet with your gun." Joey pleaded.

"The cops?" Biff scoffed. "What do you expect the cops to think once the parole officer reports you for not showng up? That somebody shot you, or that you decided to make like a banana and skedaddle?"

"It's split, not skedaddle, Tannen." A new voice said and Biff suddenly saw himself surrounded by cops. "Drop the weapon!" The cop ordered.

Biff obeyed the cop. "Alright." He said. "At least I'm taking Joey with me."

"No, Biff, you won't." George replied, revealing his presence. "Joey already did his time for the theft. Now it's your turn."

"Were you planning this from the beginning?" Biff asked while glaring at Joey.

"No, Biff." George answered. "Joey's original plan was to find the cash and return it to Dr. Brown but Marty said Doc already found it so instead we planned to have you caught in the act."

"Biff Tannen, you're under arrest for burglary, theft, attempted theft, and attempted murder." Another cop said. "You have the right to remain silent. If you waive it, everything you say can and will be used in a court of law. You have the right to have an attorney present during questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you. Do you understand these rights as I recited them to you?"

"Yes." Biff answered.

"Do you want to talk to me?" The cop asked.

"No." Biff answered and was taken away.

Biff Tannen might be dumb but he's not too dumb to know when to fold. He pleaded guilty in exchange for a reduced sentence and to have the attempted murder charge removed. "My lawyer was worth every dime." Biff commented.

Upon getting word of the truth, Biff's former boss promoted George. Having helped with Biff's defeat, George finally developed the confidence to submit the novels he wrote 30 years ago. "Dad, what if they reject you?" Marty asked.

"Marty, being worried about that kept me from showing these manuscripts for the last 30 years." George answered. "Now that I'm finally trying, I can tell the pain of rejection is probably smaller than the anguish of not even trying. What you have to tell yourself is: do you want the world to listen to your music? If the answer is "yes", send it to record companies."

"I'll think about it, Dad." Marty replied.

April 1, 2015

George Douglas McFly became 77 years old and went to Café 80's to celebrate. With him were his wife Lorraine; their son Marty and his wife Jennifer; and Marty and Jennifer's kids Marty Junior and Marlene. "Thank you all for coming." George said.

The Cafe's owner, Biff Tannen Junior, brought the McFlys a cake. "I hope you enjoy it, birthday boy." He said.

The party was then interrupted by four punks. "McFlys, I already told you to stay out of here." Their leader, Griff Tannen, said.

"And I already told you it's not your call to make, Griff." Biff Junior pointed out.

"Uncle Junior, don't you remember how the McFlys were responsible for Grandpa Biff's time in prison?" Griff asked.

"It was my father's own fault." Biff Junior argued. "If at least your mother could understand it. Why is Tiff so stubborn?"

"Dad agrees with her." Griff said.

"Because he's an immature jerk who always liked to pick on Marty McFly." Biff Junior replied. "Now order something before I expel you and your friends for disturbing the customers."

"In that case, I'll want a Hostage Special and a Pepsi Perfect, please." One of them, Rafe "Data" Unger said and the others glared at him. "What? I had a light meal for lunch."

"One Hostage Special coming up!" Biff Junior exclaimed and the rest of the gang left the place.

While Data was waiting for his meal, an old man with a cane walked in. "Data?" The old man asked in recognition. "You're friends with my grandson Griff, right? Is he here as well?"

"No, old man." Data answered. "He just left."

"Good." Biff muttered.

Biff Junior then returned with the meal ordered by Data and noticed his father. "How may I help you, Dad?" He asked.

"The usual, Junior." Biff Senior answered.

"Should we leave, George?" Lorraine asked her husband.

"Don't worry, Lorraine." George reassured his wife. "If Biff tries anything, I'll make sure he makes like a tree and leaves." He says and he, Lorraine and Marty laughed.

"What's so funny?" Marlene laughed.

"Inside joke, Marlene." Her father answered.

The End