Chapter Text
The dream always started out the same. It’s been a pretty consistent dream, but it started out vague before progressively clearing as the months went on. Sydney was like a third party watching her talk to someone. She couldn’t really see much of who she was talking to. The light effectively covers his face. Sydney was in a room, a white room — no. No, it was a nursery. She had come to realize that. A nursery with a white crib, a rocking chair and two mahogany cabinets on either side of it with two lights right above them. On the left was a red teddy bear, a gold rocket ship, and a pink globe. And on the right there were a few stuffed animals. She could only make out a brown teddy bear, a sloth, and the top of a horse’s head.
Above the crib were drapes. Different shades of blue. The center of it was a light blue, dark blue, and white flowers all about and the drapes were thickly outlined with the same dark blue. She wasn’t wearing her gloves — why wasn’t she wearing her gloves? — and she was peering down into the crib at a baby who was quietly cooing. That was when someone would come up next to her keeping a safe distance like they knew she didn’t like to be touched, that she couldn’t be touched. After a moment’s pause, she would speak. “Hey.”
“Hey.” The voice would answer hardly above a whisper as if they weren’t expecting her to speak. A man’s voice. A deep one, somewhat. Silence would hang heavily in the air before he speaks again. “Are you not surprised to see me?”
“She told me. Switch. I get to do it all over again, this life.” Sydney never understood this dream. The context of it. Who was Switch and why would anyone name their kid that? You can’t undo life. You only get one.
“Yeah,” the man stayed silent for a moment before he spoke again in the same soft tone, “and I bet you’re gonna turn out extraordinary … without me around.” She wasn’t sure if dream Syd caught onto the pang of pain in that last line, but she did.
“Yeah. I am.” Well, that’s rude to agree with him.
“I’m sorry.”
“I like your mom.” That’s when Syd would look over to him, and he’d give her a halfhearted chuckle.
“Yeah,” both of them would look back down at the baby. “Looking forward to getting to know her.”
“So now what?” Sydney would ask, sighing heavily. “We just, sort of … ”
“Fade away,” he answers her. “Into the ether.” The mood was a bit tense between the two, and Syd didn’t understand why. “I have to say, I didn’t think you’d help me.”
Sydney looked over at him again, “I didn’t. I helped him.” She said and looked down at the baby. Sydney didn’t understand it but she supposed she could bet behind helping a baby? “David.” The name rang in her head constantly as if it were alarm bells.
“Yeah?”
Syd and the man — David — looked at each other and then she answered the strangest thing, “Be a good boy.” Syd’s gaze would avert his own but he would remain on her until they didn’t. And then she woke up. Sydney reached over her night stand and marked off another tally on a notepad with a blue pen she had. That was twenty. Twenty times Sydney had that dream since she started going to college.
It wasn’t exactly a bad dream. If anything it had brought some sense of her tranquility when she woke up, even when she could hardly hear the exchanged conversation. Though at the same time, it left her with a multitude of questions; who was David? What was their relationship? Why was he sorry? Shaking off the questions that consistently ran in her head she stood up to get ready for the day. Sydney attended a nice art school and she was in her dorm. She had won the roommate lottery and landed a solo room with nobody to share the space with, which she was happy about. No risk for accidents.
She had hardly been attending for a month and she had accumulated a nice friend group varying in different grades. It was who she hung out with when she wasn’t in her dorm or in class. The dorm was small but comfortable, but a bit cluttered. God, I need to clean. Once showered and ready she chose a lengthy pair of black gloves to wear for the day as she left.
“Are you coming?” A voice had spoken from behind her. A good friend of hers, Leia. She was a junior.
“Coming where?”
“Party tonight at someone’s house.”
“Oh, someone’s? That’s specific. No thanks.”
“Syd,” Leia dragged her name out and jogged in front of her while managing to walk backwards. “You never come out with us!”
“I don’t like it.”
“You cannot go through your college experience without going to a party, Sydney Barrett.”
“Actually,” Syd stepped aside so she wouldn’t walk into a pole like Leia was about to. “I can. And I plan to!”
“We need a — fuck — DD!”
“I’m the DD anyway, seeing as I’m always picking you all up.”
“Just this once?”
“You’re never giving this up, are you?”
“Not at all.” Leia beamed at her and she sighed in defeat.
“An hour, and we’re done.”
“Two.”
“Don’t make me cut it to thirty minutes.”
“Fine.”
Would Sydney really think it over? Probably not, but she didn’t need to know that. But when all of her friends had nearly begged her to, she relented. She would just need to be more careful .
“Who’s party is this anyways?” Sydney called from the bathroom later that night as she did her make up. The answer wasn’t the least bit helpful; a lot of no idea’s or i don’t know’s. This felt like the perfect set up for a horror movie. College kids going to a party and they don’t even know who’s hosting it? “Great answers, guys.”
When they arrived she laid out ground rules; nobody but Syd even so much as thinks of driving home, she wouldn’t be drinking, everyone needs to have two cups of actual water before they leave. And with that they went inside. However Sydney and another friend of hers stayed outside to smoke.
“Thanks for coming out, Syd.”
“Don’t get too comfortable with asking, cause it’s not happening again.” Parties made Syd anxious. In high school she’d often go to raves, and switch bodies with someone. Too many people. Too many accidents waiting to happen.
“We’ll see.”
“No we wo —” her words were interrupted by a loud shriek down the street. It was a man’s. And it was followed by hyena - esque laughter.
“Lenny, slow down!”
“Time waits for nobody, kid!”
The two watched the shadows on the street grow larger as the owners of the voices came rolling down the street in a … shopping cart?
“Lenny, we'll crash!”
“Oh, we’ll be fine!”
“I’m gonna be sick.”
“Do not throw up in this shopping cart!”
“Then pull over!”
The duo pulled up by a tree and the man nearly tipped the shopping cart to stumble out. He was a lanky looking thing with disheveled blonde hair, a leather jacket and a black and white striped shirt with some plain jeans. The woman with him was noticeably shorter with equally messy hair and some tats on her fingers that somewhat resembled henna.
“That was a terrible idea.”
“Lighten up, kid! We made it in one piece didn’t we?” She said as she walked as if she were an animated character; overdramatic movements, arms swinging. The man followed behind.
“Barely.”
Syd couldn’t help but feel like she had met him before. There was a sense of familiarity in his voice and presence the closer he got. Before he went inside the two exchanged a quick look and it was like she felt an urge to follow him. To talk to him. To know him. But he left and her friend whispered, “You’re staring.”
“Shut up.” Syd shook her head and leaned against the wall. That was likely the weirdest exchange she’s ever had. And no words were said.