Chapter Text
"Thank you for coming." Hongjoong had a stoic look on his face as he deeply bowed to the people that came to pay respects. The people bowed back, reaching out to shake his hand with a comforting smile on their faces.
"She was a good woman. Kind." They patted him on the shoulder. All he could do was stiffly nod in reply.
"Please help yourself to the food and refreshments." He forced a small smile and gestured to the buffet spread where the other people were all seated.
"Should we ask him to take a break?" Yunho leaned over to ask Seonghwa as the older collated the beoseom money together.
"You can try but he's not going to like it. Just let him do what he needs to do." Seonghwa replied.
"Hyung loved his mother. They didn't have the best relationship but I know he always missed seeing her and talking to her." Yunho sighed with a small frown. Seonghwa hummed in agreement.
"But this is for him to figure out. We'll just help him where he wants us." Seonghwa said.
Hongjoong recognised all the people that came. All friends of his late father and now, mother, or his own allies. They were men that worked for him or with him. Although they didn't know his mother at all, he knew that Wooyoung had gathered all their men to come and support him as the leader.
"Oh, coming." Hongjoong noticed some people going to pay their respects and went to his post as the son, keeping his head lowered as they bowed to his mother's casket.
"You have our condolences, Hongjoong sshi. If you need anything, let us know." The leader of a small gang shook his hand.
"Thanks." He nodded. Hongjoong knew their motive, it was to create favours and forge loyalties with Ateez.
"Umm, excuse me." Hongjoong looked up at the sudden entrance of a light, tinkling voice. He eyes fell on the girl that entered, she looked so different, sticking out like a sore thumb.
Who are you?
"Here you go." You took out an envelope of money and handed it to Yunho and Seonghwa, who received it with a bow.
"You can head that way." Seonghwa gestured to where Hongjoong was standing. From the looks of it, Seonghwa seemed just as entranced and/or curious about you as Hongjoong was. You nodded and headed to him.
"You must be Hongjoong sshi." You looked at him with familiarity, still cradling the small bouquet of flowers in your arms. All Hongjoong could do was nod.
How did you know him? He, for sure, didn't know you. There wasn't an inkling of recollection seeing your face or hearing your voice.
"If it's okay with you, can I place this bouquet by the casket? It's our favourite flower." You asked politely.
"Go ahead. Thank you." He nodded. 'Our' favourite? His eyes followed you as you placed the bouquet of white tulips by the casket. The bouquet was simple but elegant.
"I'll miss our afternoon chats. Take care of yourself and rest easy." You prayed softly as you bowed to his mother's casket.
"Thank you for coming." Hongjoong said to you when the both of you stood up from your kneeled positions.
"S-Sorry..." Your bottom lip quivered and tears streamed down your face as you struggled to wipe them all away. There was so much grief and upset on your face, you probably felt more grief than Hongjoong did. Hongjoong held his handkerchief out to you but you hesitated, you didn't know him to take it.
"It's okay." He whispered, trying to convince you. With a shaky hand, you took the white cloth and dried your tears. All this time, Hongjoong was trying to study you.
"Thanks." You smiled awkwardly.
"How do you know me? Did you know my mother?" He asked, even if the answer was obviously yes.
"She comes by my shop almost every afternoon to chat with me. She'll even bring tea and snacks with her. I recognise you from the photos she shared with me." You giggled.
"I see... Well-"
"Hongjoong hyung, there are more mourners. Do you want me to take over?" Someone came over.
"No, it's fine, San ah." Hongjoong assured his brother and bowed his head to you before going back to where the casket was. You tucked the handkerchief into your pocket.
"There are snacks and refreshments." You were directed to the area where the other mourners were chatting, eating and drinking. There were barely any other women around, all men dressed in suits. It almost felt like a business convention, not a funeral.
"Who is that?" Wooyoung asked San when he came back to where they were seated.
"No idea." San shook his head. The 7 Ateez members watched you with curiosity. You sat in the corner by yourself, you didn't take any food or drinks.
"Do any of you know her or recognise her?" Mingi blinked.
"I think she genuinely knew my mother." The boys looked up to see Hongjoong standing behind them.
"Really?" Even Seonghwa was shocked too. They all knew that everyone who came didn't know Hongjoong's mother. How did someone like you befriend Hongjoong's mother?
"She's definitely not from underground." Yeosang said. You were still wiping stray tears that escaped your eyes.
"She's... really grieving the lost of my mother... Even more than me." Hongjoong observed.
"Her name is (y/n)." Yunho said, reading from the mourners book of those that came. The others didn't even notice that Hongjoong left them, going over to where you were seated alone. When Hongjoong pulled out the chair next to yours, you blinked, breaking out of your reminiscing moment.
"Apologies." He said.
"Don't apologise, you must be busy having to do this on your own, on top of the fact that you're mourning and grieving too." You shook your head with a soft smile.
"I have a good support system." He nodded over to where the other Ateez members were.
"You must haven known my mother well to know her favourite flower." Hongjoong brought the conversation back.
"She always came to buy them from me, along with other flowers. That's when I learnt that we both have the same favourite flower. I'm a florist actually." You informed.
"Oh... And here, I didn't even know my mother had a favourite flower." He chuckled.
"Hongjoong sshi." You shocked him and frankly, yourself too, when you placed a hand over his own in comfort.
"I'll miss her too but it'll be okay. From the way your mother spoke fondly of you, I could tell that you both had a great relationship. At least you'll still have your good memories of her with you." You smiled softly. Suddenly, Hongjoong retracted his hand.
"Excuse me." He stood up, buttoning his blazer. He watched as your face fell.
"Hongjoong sshi. I-I'm sorry." You stuttered, realising what you just said to him and how your words crossed a boundary. Hongjoong clenched his jaw and walked back to where Ateez was.
"Woah, hyung. You okay?" Jongho asked, noticing the sudden change in Hongjoong's mood and expression.
"I'm fine." Hongjoong replied through gritted teeth.
Despite what happened, you still stayed until the final standoff. Hongjoong was unexpectedly hypervigilant of where you were, standing on your own at the back of the crowd.
"Hang on." Before the Ateez boys could load his mother's casket into the back of the hearse, he stopped them.
"Captain?" They were confused. Leaning down, Hongjoong grabbed a stalk of flower from your bouquet and placed it on top.
"Carry on." He cleared his throat, side eyeing you. You were watching the entire time as you cried softly to yourself. All the mourners that hadn't left bowed to the hearse as it closed. Hongjoong, still holding his mother's picture, walked to the front seats where he would follow along to the burial site.
"We'll follow behind, hyung." Wooyoung said to him. Hongjoong nodded and entered with Mingi closing the door behind him. The 7 entered their respective vans that were prepared.
As the hearse began to pull out of the drive way, Hongjoong spotted you walking along the streets, arms hugging yourself.
"Who are you?" He whispered as you walked further away.
When the news of his mother's passing first came until this moment, Hongjoong hadn't shed a tear. Was he cruel or unfilial for not doing so? Or were tears just a sign of weakness?
"Good memories?" Hongjoong turned to his mother's picture, remembering what you said to him.
You sighed as you made your way into your apartment. After you removed your shoes, you fell back onto the couch.
"I can't believe you're gone." You said, feeling tears well up in your eyes again as you thought about Mrs Kim and her not being around any longer. Maybe because you grew up without a mother, she was the closest thing to a mother that you had.
"Can I help you?" The doorman asked when he saw how confused you were upon entering the building.
"Oh, good morning. Sorry to bother you but I'm looking for Mrs Kim? I hope I have the right address." You scratched your head, bowing to the older male.
"Do you mean the Mrs Kim that stays in the penthouse? I'm sorry but she passed away yesterday." He informed.
"W-Wait, what?" You couldn't believe it. The flower bouquet slipping from your hands.
"Are you okay, agashi? Yes, unfortunately, Mrs Kim passed." He picked up the bouquet, placing a hand on your shoulder. It was so shocking you couldn't even cry.
"Are you family?" He asked. It took you a while to answer as the news was still sinking in.
"N-No... I'm not but I knew her..." You tried your best to form a coherant answer in your head but it was too difficult.
"I'm sorry, agashi." He said sadly. You bowed your head and turned around, leaving the building. When you reached home, you searched funeral homes online and there it was, her name and her picture. It only solidified that what the doorman said was true, the closest person to a mother that you've had was gone.
"I can't believe I said that. (y/n), what did you do?" You facepalmed when you remembered what you said to Hongjoong. Who were you to tell him that?
"He's her real son, you're not." You scolded yourself, holding Hongjoong handkerchief in your lap.
Mrs Kim always spoke about Hongjoong with such a sad smile, indicating that their relationship wasn't amicable.
There was love, of course. But you could hear the regret and guilt in her voice. All you knew was that if you were to run into him again, you'll definitely apologise for overstepping.
Hongjoong seemed cold but you were grateful that he placed one of your flowers on top of her casket before the hearse left. Whether it was done for you or for her, Hongjoong's gesture warmed your heart.
-
"Where's he?" Seonghwa asked as he climbed up the stairs to the second floor. The younger ones nodded over to Hongjoong's back. The captain leaned against the banister of the terrace, a glass of whiskey held by his fingertips.
"He's still there. Been there since we've come back." Yeosang informed.
"(y/n) (y/l/n). She's a florist in Hongjoong hyung's territory, studying botany part time. Practically as normal as it gets." Jongho walked over, closing a folder. Seonghwa took it and read it.
"As long as she isn't a threat." San shrugged.
"Far from. If there was a motive for her to get close to Mrs Kim, it's not in the file." Jongho said, pouring himself a drink.
"But damn, she seemed to be closer to Mrs Kim than Hongjoong hyung was." Mingi stated and Seonghwa slapped the back of his head for being so direct.
"What? It's the truth..." Mingi rubbed his head. Yunho sighed, patting his best friend's back.
"Hyung will be fine, right? He has to be. He's our captain and our leader. Let's just give him some time then he'll bounce back like always." Wooyoung said with a small frown. Seonghwa nodded in agreement. Although Hongjoong suppresses his feelings and emotions, he always puts Ateez first.
"Yes, Hongjoong will be okay. He just needs space now. And don't bring up the girl anymore, okay?" Seonghwa said. The younger 6 nodded their heads obediently.
"Hyung, what happened between Hongjoong hyung and his mother?" San asked.
"No idea. Even if I did, it's not my story to tell." Seonghwa shrugged.
He is Hongjoong's best friend and second in command, but he didn't know what was Hongjoong's relationship with his mother. It was almost a love-hate relationship, for Hongjoong at least.
"Go back to work. Give Hongjoong a few days off, I'll be taking over his duties in the mean time." Seonghwa informed.
"Sure, hyung." All of them split up to go back to work. Seonghwa cast one more worried glance at his best friend's back before leaving.
Hongjoong sighed as he took another sip of whiskey. Even as he shovelled the dirt over his mother's casket, he didn't shed a tear. The heartache was there but he couldn't will himself to cry. He watched as the flower he placed on top got sullied by the dirt.
"She's really gone." He breathed out.
"You're really gone." He repeated as if he was speaking directly to his mother, clenching the glass in his hand.
You, the girl that appeared out of nowhere, seemed to have a much better relationship with his mother than he did. You cried while Hongjoong was emotionless.
"Damn it." Hongjoong must have channeled all his frustration to his hand because before he knew it, the crystal shattered into pieces.
"Hyung!" Yeosang rushed out, having seen the whole thing.
"I'm fine, Yeosang." Hongjoong hissed, cradling his now injured hand. Yeosang gently took it into his own hands, looking at how bad is was. Blood began to drip on the tiles.
"No, it's not fine. There's crystal shards in your hand now. Come." Yeosang frowned and brought Hongjoong in.
"Get someone to clean the terrace." Yeosang said to a passing butler, who nodded with a deep bow. He brought the captain to his office where his medical supplies were. Thankfully, Hongjoong didn't protest and sat down, patiently waiting for Yeosang to get what he needed to treat his hand.
"Don't move." Yeosang said as he took forceps and tried to remove the crystal pieces from the cuts. Luckily it wasn't too deep that he would need stitches.
"Are you not going to ask me anything?" Hongjoong asked as Yeosang took a magnifier to look for any smaller pieces.
"No. What's there to ask?" Yeosang asked back. At that, Hongjoong sighed and just leaned back in the seat.
"This is going to sting. Bear with me." Yeosang took the antiseptic and spray it over Hongjoong's hand, causing the leader to let out an onslaught of curse words and winces.
"I saw the butler cleaning glass on the terrace. What happened?" San came in.
"Just a small accident." Hongjoong sighed again, watching Yeosang use gauze to wrap up his hand.
"We're done. If it starts to bleed through the bandages, you have to get them changed. If not then I'll check on them in a few days." Yeosang said as he used clips and medical tape to secure the bandage. Hongjoong nodded and stood up.
"Thanks, Sangie." He left Yeosang's room. San stared at where their captain disappeared to.
"Everyone deals with grief differently, whether they want to admit it or not." San said and Yeosang let out a hum in agreement, clearing the bloodied gauze and area.
"He'll be okay. Hyung is strong." Yeosang assured.
When Hongjoong went upstairs to go back to his room, he walked past the second floor lounge and saw a file there.
'(y/n) (y/l/n)'
So, the boys went to search up on you and who you were. Reaching down, Hongjoong took the file and tucked it under his arm, retreating to his room.
"Florist... Studies botany... That's it?" He read the file as he walked. If there was anything else, even secrets, he knew Jongho and Yunho would have found it by now. No piece of information escapes those two. They can source information about a person's entire life on their computers, it's why they're the best.
"Oh?" Hongjoong paused, eyebrows raising when he saw the location of your shop. It was in the territory that he took care of, which was also the area where his mother's house was.
Despite that, Hongjoong has never once visited his mother nor has he spoken to her in years.
"How could you do this? How could you do this to me?! To us?!" Hongjoong yelled, seething with so much anger.
"I know... I'm a horrible mother, I'm sorry Hongjoong ah." His mother shook her head, tears in her eyes as she faced her angry son. She didn't even bother to give an excuse.
"Why?! Why would you do this?" He faced her, his own tears streaming down his cheeks.
"I couldn't just standby and watch. I couldn't." The woman wrapped her arms around herself pitifully. This time, Hongjoong didn't hug her.
"After everything, you'll still side with him. After knowing what he did to all of us, including you, you still..." Hongjoong shook his head, unable to finish his sentence. He was just filled with so much rage he couldn't even breathe properly.
"Get out. I never want to see you again." He turned away, hearing her soft footsteps leave his office and disappear.
"Seonghwa." Hongjoong called out, knowing that his second in command was standing nearby and most probably overheard the entire exchange that happened.
"Yeah?" Seonghwa walked in.
"I want her out of here now. Buy her a house or whatever, somewhere I don't have to see her." Hongjoong ordered.
"Sure, Hongjoong." Seonghwa bowed his head and exited the office. Hongjoong let out a yell, angrily swiping everything off his desk. Papers flews and things broke but he didn't care.
Seonghwa ended up buying his mother a penthouse apartment in the territory that Hongjoong managed. Although Hongjoong didn't like that idea, Seonghwa gave an excuse that at least Hongjoong could keep an eye on her.
He didn't know that Seonghwa did that so if he ever wanted to see his mother again or let her make amends for what she did, he'll know where she is.
But it was too late anyway. Hongjoong's mother was gone, there were no more amends to make, no more apologies.
"Great relationship? Good memories?" Hongjoong bitterly scoffed once again when he remembered your words, throwing your file aside and going to take a much needed shower.
He needed to get out of his head.