Chapter Text
“You’ll talk to Ms. Vivian about doing the extra credit, right?”
Jungeun blinks, hardly processing her father’s words. She’s exhausted from staying up all night cramming for the chemistry test today, and the last thing she wanted to do was grovel at her Calculus teacher’s feet for a couple extra marks.
She knew she had to though, because she’d flunked the last test. And by flunked, she means she got a C, which to her parents, was the absolute worst, most unforgivable offense.
A whole weekend had passed since then, but their words when she’d told them still stung like a fresh wound.
“Jungeun.”
“Oh- uh. Yeah, I will.” Jungeun straightens up in the seat, rubbing her eyes. The fatigue in her bones made her movements sluggish, and she could only hope that it’d fade by the time they got to school.
Her father could probably tell that she was barely listening because his sigh had a disappointed note to it, one that she's learned to pick apart from all his other sighs. “I expect you to do better next time.”
And something in her prickles with irritation, because it was one test. One out of more than she could count, and never once did he have anything to say about them. But of course, the one time she fell asleep at her desk the night before her calc test, he suddenly had everything to say.
She doesn’t let any of that show, biting her tongue and looking out the window instead. It was pointless arguing with him on the subject.
When he pulls up to the drive of the school, Jungeun makes quick work of getting out, unable to stand a second longer in that suffocating car.
He doesn’t say another word either, speeding off the moment she shut the door behind her. It’s something she’s grown used to, her father’s cold disposition, how he never seemed to care how much effort she put into anything until the grade wasn’t to his liking. Then he cared, but in all the wrong ways.
She’s tired of it.
Shrugging on her backpack and trudging into the school building, it’s all she can do to pretend like her eyes didn’t burn from shame and deep-seated frustation.
–
Lunch is her favourite time of the day, for no reason other than she gets to see Sarang. And Jeemin- a new addition ever since Valentine’s Day. They’ve been attached at the hip since, and are quite sickening to watch if you weren’t already used to them.
Jungeun sits down after saying hi to the both of them, unable to help but notice that they aren’t being nearly as lovey-dovey as normal. In fact, Sarang looks nervous, furiously scarfing down her lunch like her life depended on it.
“Dude. Are you okay?” She asks after she chokes for the third time and starts smacking a fist on her chest, hand flailing for a waterbottle.
“She has a chem test today,” Jeemin answers for her, handing over her waterbottle and rubbing her girlfriend consolingly on the back. “She found out about it last period.”
Jungeun’s eyes widen, both in shock and amusement. Both, because Mr. Yoonjung emphasised the test repeatedly over the past week, and because of course Sarang would forget.
“I’m so dead,” Sarang says once her throat’s cleared, slumping over on the table. “My grade’s already barely a passing one. If I fail this test...”
She doesn’t finish her sentence, throwing herself into Jeemin’s arms where the other girl's already prepared to catch her as a show of their freaky couple instincts.
Jungeun hopes she doesn’t look too disgusted by them.
“I actually have a chem test today too,” she says, clearing her throat to remind the two of them that she was, in fact, still there. “I could help.”
Sarang looks at her with a flicker of hope. “Really?”
“I mean. I don’t know how different AP and academic are, but I could take a look?”
Suddenly, it’s her that Sarang wraps her arms around, the force of it nearly knocking her off the chair, sending them both to the ground. Luckily, that doesn’t happen, so she does not get concussed on top of having her ribs crushed into powder.
“Thankyouthankyouthankyou! You’re my saviour, you know that? I’ll make it up to you tenfold, twentyfold-”
“Okay, yes, you’re welcome, now calm down ,” Jungeun mutters, fighting to be released until she finally lets her go. She sighs, shoving her lunch to the side to make room for the binder that Sarang hauls out.
She flips through the pages, stops. Jungeun looks it over, and recognises it as a unit they did a couple weeks back. Okay, so maybe this was possible.
Before she can start though, “Jeemin, I mean it when I say do not distract her. She’s going to need use every single brain cell for this.”
Jeemin nods solemnly. “You got it. I’ll do it for the sake of your chem grade, babe.”
“Hey!”
–
Her brain feels fried after the test, nothing but anxious worms swimming around in there when she’d handed it in at the end of class. It didn’t use to be this bad, but after that disastrous calc test, she started second-guessing all her work like crazy.
Leaving the classroom, she shoulders on her bag and, instead of leaving like everyone else, made her way to the math hall.
Each step she took was like a voluntary step into hell. She’s still tired from not getting enough sleep. She didn’t want to do whatever extra credit Ms. Vivian would assign. She just wanted to go home.
But home meant her parents, and studying until her nose bled. Which was even worse. Did that even count as a home anymore?
The classroom is deserted when she peeks her head in, chairs stacked against the far wall for the janitors, and Ms. Vivian seated at her desk, marking some tests.
Jungeun breathes out slowly, forcing the brightest smile she could muster on her face.
“Hi Ms. Vivian,” she says, walking in.
“Oh, Jungeun. Hello,” her teacher says, looking up and taking off her glasses. Ms. Vivian was younger than most of the other teachers in the school, probably a couple years out of school herself, so talking with her wasn’t ever that horrifyingly awkward. But she’s never had to ask her for extra credit before, so that could all change. “Did you forget something?”
She shakes her head. “No, I actually wanted to talk to you about my last test.”
Like she knew this was going to happen sooner or later, Ms. Vivian nods, waiting for her to continue.
“As you know, I’ve done well on every other assessment, I do the homework, and I really am passionate about this class. So, my last mark really…upset me, because I knew it didn’t really show my capability. If there’s anything I can do for extra marks or to make up for it, I’d really appreciate it.”
Jungeun lets out a breath. Ms. Vivian’s expression so unreadable that it only makes her even more nervous.
Finally, she nods, turning to her laptop. “I don’t normally give out extra credit for my classes, but I do acknowledge that you’re one of the brightest kids I've taught.” She clacks something on her keyboard, clicks a few links, turns back to her. “There’s a girl in one of my other classes much like you, bright but she's never believed herself to be. I want you to help her out.”
She furrows her brow, utterly confused. “Like, tutoring ?”
“Yes, exactly that.”
“But I’ve never-”
Ms. Vivian waves a hand, dismissing her next words. “Nonsense. I saw you in the cafeteria tutoring your friend. You seemed very capable then, and I trust that you’ll do a fine job.”
Jungeun wants to complain that she shouldn’t have so much trust in her, that Sarang was her friend, and not some random student she’s never spoken to before, but stops herself. Ms. Vivian’s words from earlier play in her ears; how she hardly gave out extra credit as is. If she didn’t do this, there was no guarantee there’d be another opportunity. She needs that extra credit.
“ Okay . Fine,” she manages to grit out through clenched teeth.
“Wonderful! She’ll be in the library afterschool tomorrow for your first session.”
Jungeun’s heart stopped. So soon? “T-Tomorrow?”
“The semester’s almost over, Jungeun. She’ll need all the time she can get to get her grade up to where it needs to be.”
Sometimes, she hated how much Ms. Vivian cared about her students. Every single one. Even the ones that slack off in her own class. She sighs, and agrees half-heartedly before stepping out the room.
A text from her dad is waiting for her when she opens her phone.
dad
(3:11) Can’t drive you home today. Take the bus
(3:58) What did Ms Vivian say about the extra credit?
You’d think he'd think to ask about her day, or the whole chemistry test he knew about . She knows he won't. Unless she got a C, then it'll be all he can talk about. It doesn't even surprise her anymore- 17 years of living like this certainly wears the average person down. She’s grown used to the disappointment everytime, accumulating like a weight on her chest.
She shoots a quick text back while she walks to the bus stop. Upon getting there, the tiny info blurb says that the next bus would come in twenty minutes, which she internally celebrates because she’s had to wait over an hour before in the sweltering heat of late Spring- which was a literal hell on Earth.
Plopping down on a bench, she takes out the book they’re reading for English in hopes of making some quick notes on the next couple chapters in advance.
Sarang once said she didn’t know how to enjoy her freetime like a normal human being. Which she found ridiculous, because she does know how. It’s just been ingrained into her head that she's wasting time if she's not doing something productive. If you wanted to be the best, you had to put in the work.
The words swim across the page. Her brain is reading the print, but not processing anything. She doesn’t even know what being the best means anymore, if that's even what she wants. She hasn't really thought about it. Maybe she should try.
–
Jungeun pushes open the doors to the library the next day with all the enthusiasm of an underpaid McDonald’s employee. Except she wasn’t being paid. Not really.
She walks in, says hi to the librarian because of course she’s friends with the damn librarian, and looks around. Ms. Vivian said the library, which isn't really helpful, given the number of students still lingering in the space.
There’re a couple people sitting alone, but they look like they’re already studying. Some of them in groups, goofing off. In the corner sits a girl spread out on a chair. The math textbook on the table beside her clues her in that this is probably her tutee.
The girl looked a little intimidating from afar, wearing all black and a vibe that screamed don’t bother me .
Not that she heeds it any mind. Jungeun is here to get that stupid credit, not vibe check some random girl. She walks over, and takes a seat without a word.
The girl blinks, looking at her with such thinly veiled judgement that Jungeun’s face grows hot.
“Calculus, right?” She quickly asks, eyes darting to the textbook. It was, in fact, a calculus textbook, but she just wanted to double-check. Why did this girl have to stare so intensely at her?
“Yeah,” the girl says, sitting up into a less back-breaking posture, and scooting her chair closer to the table. “And you’re my tutor?”
“Yep. I’m Jungeun.”
“Jiyoon,” she says, and Jungeun swears she’s heard that name from somewhere.
There’s no time to think about it much more though, because Jiyoon is already pulling out a notebook and huffing with an air of impatient. Then, she flashes a grin that Jungeun immediately clocks as her not taking this tutoring seriously at all. “Let’s make this quick. I have plans at 5.”
Jungeun frowns, entirely put-off. It hasn’t even been 5 minutes, and this girl was already eager to leave. Not that she wanted to be here either, but she wasn’t announcing it to the entire world with every restless glance at the clock or really loud, really annoying sigh. That's like, basic people skills, isn't it? Jungeun wouldn't know, she doesn't talk to much people outside of Jeemin and Sarang.
Still, something in her twinges with what could only be described as irritation. She could only hope that today was a one-off occasion, because it'd make her life a whole lot easier if they could just get along.
“That’ll depend on how well you do,” is what she finally says, pulling out one of the worksheet that Ms. Vivian had given her and pushing it towards her.