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It was a Monday, and I felt like death.
I thought I’d planned everything perfectly—my period was supposed to hit over the weekend. I could suffer in peace, buried under blankets with no obligations. But no. The universe had other plans, and now I was sitting in my apartment, feeling worse by the minute. The cramps were brutal, my head was pounding, and I could barely think straight.
I rubbed my temples and sighed, reaching for my phone. I needed to tell Kouyou that I was working from home today. She always knew when something was off, and—unfortunately—she was one of the few people who knew about this.
I wasn't exactly forthcoming about it with others.
As expected, when I told her, she wasn’t exactly thrilled.
“Of course,” she snapped on the phone. “You would have your period in the same week as mine. Figures.”
“I didn’t plan this, you know,” I groaned. “Trust me, I’d rather not be dealing with it either. But I’m working from home, so you don’t have to worry about me.”
“Oh, good. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to deal with you being extra annoying in the office today.” She didn’t sound entirely serious, but I could tell she was annoyed
“I’ll leave you alone, promise. Good luck.”
She hung up without much more, and I tossed the phone aside, leaning back against the couch. The cramps twisted in my abdomen, and I felt like I was going to be sick. There was no way I was leaving the house like this.
Hirotsu.
I had to call him to get the reports, but I couldn’t exactly tell him why I needed to stay home. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust him—it was just... embarrassing. He didn’t know about this side of me. Or at least, I thought he didn’t. I grabbed my phone again and dialed him.
“Ryurō,” I started, keeping my voice as even as possible. “I need you to bring the reports to my apartment. I’m feeling... under the weather, so I’ll be working from home today.”
There was a pause, and for a moment, I thought I’d gotten away with it.
“I see,” he said, his voice calm as always. “Under the weather, you say?”
“Yes,” I confirmed, already feeling a little uneasy. There was something in his tone.
“I’ll be there shortly.”I hung up, letting out a breath of relief. Maybe I’d gotten away with it after all.
About an hour later, there was a soft knock at my door. I dragged myself off the couch, wincing as the cramps flared up again, and opened it to find Hirotsu standing there, a small bag in hand.
“I brought the reports,” he said, handing me the documents, but there was something else in his hand. He gave me a pointed look before handing over the bag as well. I looked inside, and my face flushed with embarrassment. Chocolate, painkillers… and pads.
My mouth opened, but no words came out. He knew. How did he know?
“I thought you might need these,” he said, completely calm, as if this were the most normal thing in the world.
“I—uh—thanks,” I muttered, feeling my face heat up. “but… you—um?”
He gave me a small, knowing smile.
“I’ve been around long enough to notice the signs. You’re not as good at hiding things as you think.”
I groaned, feeling my embarrassment double. “Great. So you knew this whole time?”
“Not the whole time,” he corrected. “But I noticed you weren’t feeling well today. You look pale, Sir. You should rest before you get started on these reports.”
I stared at him, caught off guard. “Rest? I can’t—there’s too much to do.”
“There’s always work,” he said gently. “But you’re clearly not in any condition to focus. At least take a break before you dive into anything. You look terrible.”
“I feel terrible,” I admitted, pressing a hand to my stomach. “But I can’t just... take the day off.”
“You don’t have to,” he said. “But take a moment for yourself. I’ll stay here and help you if you need anything.”
I blinked, surprised by his offer. “You don’t have to stay.”
“I want to,” he said simply, stepping inside and closing the door behind him. “You look like you’re dying, Mori. At least let me make sure you’re comfortable.”
I couldn’t argue with that. I was too exhausted. Instead, I shuffled back to the couch, letting myself collapse onto the cushions with a sigh.
Hirotsu followed, sitting beside me and handing me a piece of chocolate from the bag. I accepted it wordlessly, biting into it as I leaned my head back.
“You didn’t have to bring all this,” I muttered after a moment. “But... thank you.”
“It’s nothing,” he said, watching me closely. “You shouldn’t be embarrassed about this.”
“I’m not embarrassed,” I lied, though my flushed cheeks gave me away.
He raised an eyebrow, clearly not believing me. “If you say so. Now, rest.”
I sighed, trying to bury my embarrassment under the cushions as I leaned back, taking another bite of chocolate. The cramps twisted painfully in my abdomen again, and I winced, clutching my stomach reflexively.
Hirotsu’s eyes flicked down to my hand. “Do you have any heat pads?”
I shook my head, keeping my gaze fixed on the ceiling. “No, I don’t usually need them. I just... deal with it.”
Hirotsu didn’t respond right away, but I heard him moving around. When I finally glanced over, I saw him grabbing a towel and heading to the kitchen. The sound of running water filled the apartment, and I blinked, watching him in confusion.
“What are you doing?” I asked, forcing myself to sit up.
“Since you don’t have heat pads, I’m improvising,” he said calmly, wringing out the towel before returning with it. “This should help.”
I stared at the damp towel in his hands, feeling my face heat up for the second time today. “You don’t have to—”
“I want to help,” he interrupted, his tone firm but gentle as he sat beside me again. “Lie down.”
I hesitated. This wasn’t something I ever let anyone see—this weakness, this pain. Especially not someone like Hirotsu, someone who respected me, who followed me without question. What if he saw me differently after this? What if—
“Mori.”
His voice cut through my spiraling thoughts, and I looked at him. He wasn’t impatient or irritated. He just... waited.
With a sigh, I lay back down on the couch, feeling my stomach twist—not from the cramps, but from the sudden rawness of being seen like this. As he placed the warm towel over my abdomen, I felt the heat slowly seep through my skin, easing the tension a little.
“You don’t have to do this,” I mumbled again, more to myself than to him.
“I know,” Hirotsu said softly.
I didn’t know how to respond to that, so I just stayed quiet, staring up at the ceiling while the warmth from the towel settled into my body. It helped—more than I wanted to admit. The pain was still there, but the sharp edge of it dulled slightly, and I exhaled slowly.
But the minutes passed, and I couldn't stop thinking about what this could be.
What if this was too much? What if he looked at me now and didn’t see the person he used to see? What if—
“Mori,” Hirotsu said again, his voice pulling me out of my thoughts. His gaze was steady, unwavering, as if he could read exactly what was going through my mind. “You don’t have to worry about how I see you. This doesn’t change anything.”
I swallowed hard, my chest tightening. He knew. Maybe he didn’t know everything, but he knew enough. Enough to see through me.
“But... what if you don’t...” I trailed off, unable to finish the sentence.
“What if I don't know what?” he asked gently.
I shifted uncomfortably, my hands fidgeting in my lap. “But what if you don’t look at me the same after this?”
“hm,” he said quietly, “I’ve never looked at you any differently than the person you are. And I never will.”
A lump formed in my throat, and I quickly turned my head away, blinking back the sudden sting in my eyes. I didn’t know why his words hit me so hard, but they did. Maybe it was a relief. Maybe it was the fact that, for once, I didn’t have to explain myself. He just... understood.
I stayed silent, letting the warmth of the towel wash over me.
“Forgive my boldness,” Hirotsu murmured, his voice soft but laced with hesitation. His fingers brushed against my hair, tentative at first, as if waiting for me to stop him. I didn’t. I couldn’t. I was too exhausted—too drained from the pain and the weight of my own thoughts to push him away.
Instead, I let myself lean into it, curling up tighter on the couch, the warmth of his hand a welcome distraction from everything else. His touch was gentle, rhythmic, as he caressed my hair, and before I realized what I was doing, I shifted, moving my head onto his lap.
I care how it look but I just... needed this. Needed him.
I closed my eyes, trying to focus on the soothing sensation of his hand in my hair, but my mind kept racing. The pain, the embarrassment, the constant stress—it all swirled together, pressing down on me until I couldn’t breathe.
A small whine escaped my throat, surprising even me, and I immediately felt heat rush to my cheeks. But I didn’t move. I stayed there, burying my face deeper into Hirotsu’s lap as if I could hide from the world in this small space.
He didn’t say anything at first, just continued stroking my hair with that same gentle touch, as if he understood exactly what I needed without me having to say a word.
“Sir,” he said quietly after a few minutes, his voice calm but probing. “Do you want to go to bed? You might feel more comfortable there.”
His words grated against the growing frustration inside me, and I felt a flare of annoyance rise up, even though I knew he didn’t deserve it. “No,” I muttered, my voice sharper than I intended. “I don’t know. I just... I don’t know.”
I wasn’t making any sense, and I hated it. I hated how out of control I felt—how everything seemed to be slipping away from me, and I couldn’t do anything to stop it.
He didn’t react to my tone. Instead, he shifted slightly, his hand never leaving my hair. “It’s okay if you don’t know,” he said gently, as if my frustration didn’t faze him. “You don’t have to decide anything right now.”
I didn’t respond, too wrapped up in my own emotions to say anything else. The cramps were still there, twisting painfully in my stomach, but the worst part was the overwhelming sense of helplessness. I wanted to snap, to yell, to do something to release the tension building inside me—but I couldn’t.
I was stuck.
Another whine escaped me, and this time, I didn’t try to hold it back. I just pressed my face harder against Hirotsu’s lap, seeking some kind of relief, some kind of comfort in the only place I had right now.
“I’ve got you,” Hirotsu murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. “Let’s get you to bed, alright? You need to rest.”
I didn’t argue this time. I didn’t have the energy. So, when he carefully helped me sit up and guided me toward the bedroom, I let him. I let him pull me to my feet, his arm steady around my shoulders, as we made our way to the bed.
The second I lay down, I felt the exhaustion wash over me. The pain, the stress—it all caught up to me at once, and I felt my eyes burn with unshed tears. I hated feeling this way. I hated being so weak, so needy.
Hirotsu knelt beside the bed, his gaze soft as he looked at me. “Do you want me to stay?”
I hesitated for a moment, but the answer was already there, buried beneath the layers of pride. “Yes,” I whispered, my voice small. “Please.”
Without another word, he slid into the bed beside me, pulling me gently into his arms. The warmth of his body, the steady rhythm of his breathing—it was enough to make the tension in my chest loosen just a little.
I curled up against him, pressing my face into his chest, and let out a shaky breath. “I’m sorry,” I mumbled, the words muffled against his shirt. “I don’t... I don’t usually get like this.”
Hirotsu’s hand found its way back to my hair, and he stroked it soothingly, his voice a calm, steady anchor in the storm of my emotions. “You don’t have to apologize for needing comfort. I’m here.”
I closed my eyes, letting myself sink into the warmth of his embrace. The vulnerability still lingered, but it wasn’t as sharp now. It didn’t hurt as much.
Because, for once, I wasn’t alone.
And that, more than anything, was what I needed.
╭────────────────────────────────────╮
I woke up feeling disoriented, my body heavy and warm, wrapped in something solid and comforting. For a moment, I couldn’t remember where I was, or why my head felt so much clearer than before. Then I realized I wasn’t alone.
Hirotsu.
I blinked, slowly becoming aware of the fact that I was still nestled against him, my head resting on his chest, our legs tangled together under the blankets. His arm was still around me, holding me close, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
But the first thing I noticed—after the warmth, after the calm that seemed to have settled over me—was the drool. A lot of it.
I’d somehow managed to drool all over his shirt in my sleep, leaving a damp patch on his chest that now stared up at me like a cruel reminder of my unconscious state. My face flushed immediately, heat crawling up my neck as I pulled back slightly, my hand reflexively reaching up to wipe my mouth.
Great. Just great.
I groaned inwardly, my embarrassment flaring to life again, making my heart race. It wasn’t enough that I’d spent the night whining and clinging to him like a child—I’d also had to go and drool all over him.
It was also already morning. I haven't done anything I should have done at late night.
Hirotsu shifted slightly, his arm tightening around me as he woke up. I froze, my mind scrambling for some kind of explanation, something to cover up the fact that I’d made a mess of myself—and him.
Before I could even say a word, his eyes fluttered open, and he looked down at me with a sleepy, soft expression that made my heart skip a beat. There was no irritation, no discomfort—just calm. And then, without saying a word, he reached down and pulled me closer, his arm slipping under my neck as he cradled me against his chest again.
Like it was nothing. Like it was completely normal.
My throat tightened with somethingI couldn’t name, and I found myself instinctively pressing my face into his chest, my embarrassment still there, but... somehow less important now.
“You’re awake,” he murmured, his voice still thick with sleep, his breath warm against my hair. His hand moved slowly to stroke my back, a lazy, soothing rhythm that made my body relax despite myself.
I didn’t know what to say. I felt better—much better than before—but the vulnerability still lingered, and now this... this intimacy between us. It felt like something a partner would do, not just someone who was here out of obligation. But the thought was too much for me. Is not the time to think about my subordinate.
“Sorry,” I muttered, my voice muffled against his chest. “I... I drooled on you.”
His chest rumbled with a quiet chuckle, and I felt his hand pause for a second before resuming its gentle caress. “It’s alright. You needed the rest.”
I felt my face heat up again, and I was grateful he couldn’t see how flustered I was. “Still... it’s….”
He didn’t say anything, just continued to hold me like it was the most natural thing in the world, his fingers tracing slow circles against my back. It was comforting in a way I hadn’t expected—a way I hadn’t allowed myself to feel in... a long time.
“You don’t have to be embarrassed,” he said finally, his voice soft. “I don’t mind.”
I didn’t know how to respond to that, so I stayed quiet, letting myself melt into the warmth of his embrace. For the first time in a long while, I felt... safe. Safe enough to let my guard down completely, even if only for a little while.
But I love to ruin things for myself.
As the silence stretched between us, I knew I couldn’t let it go unaddressed. This... closeness—it wasn’t professional. It wasn’t what colleagues did. I should’ve said something earlier, but now, lying here in Hirotsu’s arms, it felt too late. Too comfortable.
I shifted slightly, just enough to look up at him. “You know... this isn’t exactly... professional,” I started awkwardly, my voice quieter than I intended. “Us... like this. I mean, it’s not that I mind. It’s just—if you feel uncomfortable or think we should—”
He was staring at me, eyes soft but with a certain intensity I couldn’t quite place. It made me feel self-conscious, like I’d said something incredibly stupid or—god forbid—I still had drool on my face.
I quickly reached up to wipe at my mouth, my stomach twisting with embarrassment. “Do I have...?” I trailed off, my fingers brushing over my lips just in case.
But Hirotsu didn’t move. He didn’t break his gaze or let go of me. Instead, he just kept looking at me like... like I was missing something obvious.
“I don’t—” I cleared my throat, trying to gather my thoughts. “If this is weird for you, you can... you know, go back to the office. I’ll be fine. I’m not saying I don’t like... this. But if you think we’re crossing a line—”
“Mori,” Hirotsu interrupted, his voice calm and steady, but his expression... something shifted in it.
He was still looking at me like an idiot, like I was completely clueless. And it was starting to make me feel like I was missing something obvious. My stomach knotted up with a strange tension as I stared back at him, trying to figure out what I’d said wrong.
“What?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. “Do I... have something on my face?”
He sighed, but it wasn’t an exasperated sigh—it was something softer, something almost... affectionate. His hand came up to cup my cheek, and for a brief second, I thought I might’ve stopped breathing altogether.
“You don’t have anything on your face,” he said gently, his thumb brushing lightly against my skin. “I’m just wondering when you’re going to realize.”
Realize what?
I blinked up at him, my heart doing this weird, uncomfortable thing in my chest. “hm?”
He didn’t answer immediately, just kept looking at me with that same patient, affectionate gaze that was making my stomach twist in ways I couldn’t fully explain. The silence between us stretched again, heavy but not uncomfortable.
Then, finally, he spoke.
“Mori,” he said softly, his thumb still gently stroking my cheek, “I’ve wanted to be this close to you for a long time.”
My brain short-circuited. My first instinct was to laugh it off, to make some flippant remark about how this was obviously just him being nice, taking care of his boss while I was down for the count.
But the way he looked at me... it wasn’t just kindness. It wasn’t just professionalism or duty.
It was something else entirely.
“I...” I started, then stopped, my mouth going dry. I tried again. “You... have?”
He nodded, his expression steady, as if this was the most obvious thing in the world. “But you’re my superior. It’s not my place to say anything.”
My head spun. I didn’t know what to say, how to react. The logical part of my mind told me I should push him away, tell him we were crossing a boundary we couldn’t afford to cross. That this was unprofessional, and we both knew better.
But the part of me that was still pressed against his chest, still cradled in his arms, was quiet. Calm.
I didn’t want to move. I didn’t want to push him away.
“I... I didn’t know,” I admitted, my voice sounding small to my own ears. “I thought you... didn’t see me that way.”
“Then you’re not as observant as you think, at least if we are talking about feelings” he replied, his lips quirking up into the slightest smile. It wasn’t mocking—just... fond.
I opened my mouth to respond, but no words came out. I was still too stunned to process what was happening.
He liked me. He had liked me—wanted me like this for a while. And I... I’d never even noticed.
For a moment, I wondered if I was still dreaming, but the warmth of his hand on my cheek, the steady rhythm of his breathing, and the way my own heart thudded in response to his closeness told me this was real.
“I... don’t know what to say,” I finally managed to mutter, feeling the heat rise to my cheeks again. “I’m not exactly good at this.”
“I don’t expect you to be,” he said, his voice still calm, still steady. “I just want you to know... that this is where I want to be. With you.”
There was a vulnerability in his words, in the way he held me now, and I realized I wasn’t the only one feeling exposed. Hirotsu— calm, composed Hirotsu—was putting himself out there, showing me a side of him I hadn’t seen before.
I swallowed hard, but I knew one thing for certain—I didn’t want to push him away.
So, instead of speaking, I just leaned back into him, resting my head against his chest once more, letting his steady heartbeat calm the whirlwind of emotions in my mind.
Maybe this wasn’t as unprofessional as I thought. Maybe... maybe I needed this too.
“I’m not good at this,” I admitted again quietly. “But... I don’t mind you staying.”
Hirotsu’s hand stroked my hair gently, and I felt the tension in my body melt away.
“Then I’ll stay,”
He pulled me closer. And we just stayed like that.
I wish I could stay like this forever.