Work Text:
Darry didn’t usually have nightmares. He slept fitfully after their parents died and barely slept at all while Ponyboy was missing. But he never had nightmares. And then he watched Dallas Winston be gunned down just feet in front of him.
Darry had seen so much violence in his life. Being a greaser made sure of that. He’d seen broken bones and faces so beaten he couldn’t recognize them. None of it even compared to watching Dally’s body jerk as bullets riddled his chest.
The cops had turned to the five of them and for a split second, Darry was certain that they would open fire on them and there was nothing he could do to protect what remained of his gang, his brothers .
But they hadn’t.
Darry’s dreams weren’t as merciful.
In his nightmares, he watched his boys be shot. He saw Steve lying on the ground, a pool of blood haloing his head. He saw Two-Bit leaning against the curb, trying in vain to stop the blood seeping from his stomach. He saw Soda with bullet wounds in his chest, but alive enough to sob and scream as he cradled Ponyboy’s lifeless body.
Two-Bit and Soda looked at Darry. Their eyes were filled with fear. “Darry-” Soda gasped through a sob. His eyes lifted above Darry’s eyes.
With a trembling hand, Darry reached up and felt a bullet hole in his forehead, hot blood weeping down his nose.
Darry jerked up with a gasp, drenched in sweat. It took him a moment to catch his breath and calm his racing heart. Darry dragged a hand down his face. That nightmare had been plaguing him for the better part of two weeks. Every few days he would wake up with a gasp, the image of his gang full of bullets lingering in his mind.
At this point, he knew there was only one way to get back to sleep. He threw his blankets off and padded into the hallway. Soda and Pony’s bedroom door was cracked open so he nudged it open.
The two boys were sprawled out, legs thrown everywhere in ways that couldn’t possibly be comfortable. Soda was snoring. God, he loved them so much. In the moonlight, he could see Pony’s eyes blink open and find him in the doorway.
“Darry?” He asked, lifting himself onto his elbow.
“Hey, Pone,” Darry sat down on the edge of the bed next to his baby brother. He reached out and pulled the blanket up around Pony’s shoulders as he laid back down. “Just checkin’ on y’all.”
“Nightmare?”
“Yeah.” Darry gave up lying about it a few days ago. All three of them were struggling after losing Dally and Johnny, it didn’t help Soda or Pony if he was hiding how he was feeling. “Just needed to make sure you’re okay.”
“Soda keeps kickin’ me,” Pony mumbled. Darry chuckled. Then Pony met Darry’s eyes sincerely. “Are you okay?”
Darry nodded, “Go back to sleep.” Pony snuggled back down into his blankets, making Darry hold back a laugh as he kicked Soda’s legs off of him. Darry just sat there for a few more moments. He watched Soda and Pony’s chests rise and fall evenly and listened to Soda’s snoring. Whatever tension was left from his nightmare dissipated with each passing moment.
When he finally was able to pull himself from his brothers, he padded into the kitchen for a glass of water. As he extended the cup under the faucet, Darry noticed his hand trembling something awful.
With the glass barely filled, he set it to the side and leaned over the sink. He squeezed his eyes shut and forced deep breaths. But with closed eyes, all he could see was Soda and Pony, lying in their bed, the sheets stained with blood.
“Fuck,” he whispered to himself. He turned on the faucet and splashed some water on his face. He was going fucking crazy, he was losing his mind. He just saw the two of them in bed, he knew they were safe and unharmed. But his racing heart didn’t trust that.
“Darry?”
He turned around to see his brothers standing in the doorway. They were both bleary eyed, but were looking at him with concern. Fuck.
He turned back to the sink and looked down at the water slipping into the drain. “Go back to bed, y’all.” Darry’s hands were clenched on the edge of the counter top, knuckles white. “It’s late.”
“We know,” Soda’s voice was so fucking gentle, as though he was afraid of spooking Darry. He felt his brother’s hand on his back.
“Pone, you didn’t need to wake him up,” Darry told them, still not looking up. “I told you I was okay.”
“No, you didn’t,” the smartass said. “You just told me to go back to sleep.” Darry felt Ponyboy nudge up against him, but he couldn’t bear to look at him. There were tears in his eyes, he couldn’t let his brothers see.
Of course, Soda didn’t like that one bit. He pulled on Darry’s shoulder and turned him around. Darry found his brothers looking up at him with those damn puppy eyes. Soda hugged him tight around the middle, Ponyboy quickly following suit.
There were a lot of things Darry liked about being big, but the best one by far was his ability to hold both his brothers at once. Tears slipped from his eyes.
“You’re okay,” Ponyboy murmured, mimicking Soda’s usual words of comfort.
After a long, long moment, Darry pulled back and looked at the two of them. “The same dream?” Soda asked.
Darry leaned back on the counter and took a drink from his forgotten glass of water. “Yeah.” He’d confessed the contents of the dream when Soda had woken up to find Darry sleeping on the floor of their bedroom. “But like I said, I’m-”
“You’re not fine,” Pony said sharply. For the first time that night, Darry really looked at his little brother. There was more than just worry, there was fear. His lip trembled ever so slightly and then he repeated quietly, “You’re not fine and I’m sick of you pretending that you are. None of us are fine, Darry.”
Soda squeezed Pony’s shoulder in reassurance, “He’s right.” Darry moved to drag a hand down his face, but Soda caught his hand and put it to his chest, right where the bullet holes were in his dream. “We’re not fine, but we’re together and we’re here. And we’ve got nothing if we can’t lean on each other.”
Under his palm, Darry could feel Soda breathing. He could feel his brother’s blood flowing through his veins. And he let out a long breath. “I’m sorry, fuck, I’m sorry.” Tears brimmed in his eyes, he reached out and put a hand on Pony’s chest as well. Pony gripped his wrist, holding his arm in place. “If I were to lose either of you, I-” He cut himself off with a sharp inhale. He hated the waver in his voice.
“It’s my worst nightmare,” Pony said softly. He glanced between Soda and Darry shyly. “The-the worst dreams I have are about losing either of you, both of you.”
Darry pulled Ponyboy into an embrace. He didn’t know how to be comforted, but he had learned how to comfort his brothers, that he could do. So he kissed Ponyboy’s head, “We ain’t going nowhere.”
“Damn right,” Soda agreed, but he was looking at Darry, not Pony.
Darry swallowed thickly, “I love you both, so goddamn much.”
“Enough to go back to sleep?” Soda teased, poking Darry.
Darry chuckled and ran a hand over Pony’s head absentmindedly. “Yeah, alright. You two get back to bed, I just need some air.”
“No.” Soda grabbed Darry’s bicep and Ponyboy’s hand.
The two of them pulled Darry into their bedroom and bullied him onto the bed. They each curled up on one of his sides before he could even try to sit up. The three of them barely fit in the bed together, but none of them cared.
Darry could feel Pony’s breath on his arm. The pulse point on Soda’s wrist was pressed to Darry’s hand, there was no doubt it was intentional. Even though he was already sweating with the two of them in bed and that Pony and Soda definitely needed to clean their room, Darry got the best night sleep he’d had in weeks.