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Two figures emerged from the Zeta tube into the Batcave, one wearing the Batman costume and the other wearing a tuxedo; they were otherwise identical. “Did Jaylad get home ok? And our friends? Did that magic doohickey hurt anyone?”
“Red Hood and Jason arrived safely, as have Kal-el and Clark. Diana was unaffected.”
“Well, she doesn’t do the secret identity thing, does she? Her loss.” Brucie slung his arm across Batman’s shoulders; Batman leaned into it, just a little. “Oh hey, we should get some photos while we have the chance.”
Batman sat in the Batcomputer’s chair and ran some calculations on the readings he’d taken from the artifact. “Twelve hours.”
“Plenty of time, then.” Brucie leaned against the back of the chair, and rested his chin between the horns of his counterpart’s mask. “It would sure keep the press guessing – Vicky’s been pestering me for an interview, you know. I bet she’s fishing for scandals again.”
“Hn.”
“Right?! I’m gonna talk about Damien entering Titus in the dog show instead, that’s much more fun.”
“Good cover,” Batman grunted.
“You can count on me,” Brucie murmured.
“Always.” Batman’s fingers flew across the keyboard, completing the report on the incident.
“Love you too, B.” Brucie ran his thumbs along the edge of Batman’s cowl, and got a rumbling noise in return. “Does Selina know you can make a noise like that?”
“No.” Batman purred again. “Can you?”
“Hmm, we should investigate that. I’m supposed to be the sugar daddy here, I bet I could show you some sugar – ”
With two keystrokes, Batman saved his file and shut down the computer. He spun around and pounced on Brucie.
***
Clark was taking off his tie as soon as the apartment door closed. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking, Kal?”
“Probably, since we’re aspects of the same person.”
“Ha! Score one for Team Threesome.”
“What did Lois have to say?”
Clark checked his phone. “To get pictures. And that it’s too bad she won’t be back from Prague before this wears off.”
Kal-El smiled and shed his suit. “I suspect the makers of that artefact weren’t expecting this result.”
“What, like they meant us to fight each other?” Clark’s outfit was taking longer to remove. “Joke’s on them, they could never guess how much we support each other.”
“And appreciate each other, eh?” They took a moment to nuzzle into each other. “How are we going to do this? From what I’m sensing, you have human-normal strength.”
“Yes, and it’s weird. People live like this?” Clark snorted. “I’m sure we can figure something out, with a little ingenuity.” He pushed Kal-El onto the couch and straddled him. “A reporter has to have a sense of adventure, after all.”
“And I can promise you an experience that’s out of this world.”
***
Elsewhere, Jason and Red Hood were sitting together on a ratty couch. Jason’s head was leaning on Hood’s shoulder, and Hood’s helmet rested on Jason’s hair. The only sound was the turning of pages.