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Early December days are sometimes the coldest ones in a year, anyone who spends most of their days outside can tell you that. There might be no snow yet, but the ground is frozen solid and the sun is hiding behind dark clouds. Kaiser never really paid much attention to the sky, but it seemed to be fitting his current position.
He didn't know for how long he'd been laying down on the ground next to the wall where he usually went to kick his ball. His most precious belonging, his only belonging, which is placed somewhere near his feet. Cold started seeping through his bones, but the ache in his muscles made him not want to move.
Dad's beating was more awful than usual, his stomach was so bruised that every breath hurt, the marks on his neck stung, his legs were swollen. Kaiser didn't want to stay home, but getting to the playground was a difficult journey.
His breath was coming out in puffs, that lingered due to the cold air. Cold helped to ignore the pain in his body. All Kaiser was hearing was the sound of the wind and cars passing the park. Not surprising that nobody wanted to be outside, he also would prefer to curl up in a warm bed, but life didn't grant him this privilege.
Actually everything in his life was unfair, his mom leaving him with his awful father, the way his house looked, the fact that he is forced to steal to stay alive. He huffed a frustrated sigh when he felt tears welling up in his eyes. Blinking his eyes he tried to stretch his feet only to find out that he could barely feel his toes. Not a good sign.
He barely had any clothes on him, just an old hoodie from some shitty material and worn out pants with holes. That was an easy gateway into getting sick. Trying to not think about his state he tried to recall today's date. After pondering for a bit he was left confused with how slow his mind worked and no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t remember what day it was. Clearly it wasn’t his birthday yet, but at this point Kaiser wasn’t too sure anymore. Due to all his thinking he didn’t notice that he started shivering. Ah, how he just wanted to live a normal life. Away from pain, his dad, stealing. All the things that made him want to disappear from this world. The most prominent thought and the last clear one in his mind seemed to be that he misses everything that didn’t happen and that he will never get any of it back.
Kaiser turned to his side which took some time, even his limbs don’t seem to want to cooperate with him. Feeling more useless than ever he just looked at the car that was passing nearby. It has already grown cold so when the vehicle made a turn his eyes were hit with light.
He closed his eyes due to this sudden flash of light. He slowly peeled them open only to be stunned with the view in front of him. He wanted to shield himself from the sight, but his hands were unable to move. He was flooded by intense panic, breathing was a chore so he surrendered and cast his gaze towards the source of his perturbation.
Surrounded by warm light that was creating a welcoming atmosphere stood floated an outworldly being. A soft material covered its body, everything except white cloth and hair? was motionless. The breath that Kaiser was trying to desperately grasp seemed even more out of reach. This individual was gorgeous. He moved his eyes towards the face. A deep magenta stared back, trying to manage eye contact was difficult. He switched his focus towards other parts, soft skin with a light blush, an open expression, plum lips curved into a soft smile. Breathing. It was breathing,but he wasn’t. It was enough to make him stop his admiration.
Kaiser decided to break the silence, but found himself unable to speak. Slowly the individual started to approach him. He was bringing warmth with his being and Kaiser wanted nothing more than to be held very close and very soft by this stranger. To feel how tight is the grasp and how somehow everything's going to be alright. After all this chaos he for the first time feels calm and safe.
He finally was able to take a breath, the first thing he noticed was a faint smell of Pflaumenkuchenit, which made him a bit more relaxed. Laying his head on this angel's chest, he started feeling more cozy. It’s Ness’s hair shifted to shield him from whatever was going around them and in this moment he decided to start appreciating its color brown mixing with magenta.
Soft hand started caressing his arm and he couldn’t help curling up further into the figure. It was just like they said: Human beings ate the bread of angels; he sent them all the food they could eat. He suddenly felt selfish for taking more than he was offered, but moving away seemed impossible. Ness wanted him as much as he wanted the safety that he greedily took from him. It started to bring tears to his eyes, they were not falling, but his vision was getting more blurry so they must have been there.
Kaiser felt the urge to ask Ness if he saw him before, not all the hideous acts he did, but times where he was trying to be good. Is he no good? Was kindness something he just wasn’t blessed with? Was he born rotten? Like a fruit that looks good on the outside, but as soon as you cut it in half bugs start to crawl out. Would Ness understand if he told him that he felt like a bad person ever since he was born? That he was unwanted? Why did Ness want him? It’s not possible that Ness knew him, if he did he would never touch him and never bless him with this sweet plum aroma.
He thinks back to the time when he passed by the bakery and saw all the cakes he wanted to try, but couldn’t. He didn’t steal them. This must be the reason Ness smells like cake. Ness who is warm and doesn't feel the coldness deep inside him. Ness has a good heart and he has a bad one, that’s why they complement each other. Still Ness might not be as nice as he seems. He didn’t say a word to Kaiser, yet he isn’t ignoring him.
Wishing he could see his face again Kaiser tried tilting his head, but it stayed rotted in its place. That’s okay, the soft smile he saw was clear as day in his head. It felt like heaven.
All of a sudden it was cold again, wind picked up, cars were loud, some sirens blared in the distance, muffled voice of someone talking through a phone came from the closebay. Ness put a head over his ear and it was quiet again. Kaiser preferred this stillness from life.
Last rational thing Kaiser managed to come up with in his mind was that he loved Ness. He didn’t know him, but he knew his gentleness, warmth and softness. The comfortable life he thought he didn’t deserve came to him at last.
And it was how it ended for him:
Wrapped in the gentlest hands that dared to hold him and with all this burning pain in his body and mind going quiet.