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Stan blankly stared at the ceiling as he lay on the floor. From time to time he’d glance at his bed thinking it be much more comfortable if he could just pull himself up and lay there but his arms would refuse to move. If he could, he’d fuse with the carpet. Maybe that would stop the slight headache starting to form. Didn’t help the sun had started to set and was now filling his room with overwhelming orange light.
So there he was. His mind was so numbed to anything. He had tried to fill his time with YouTube or one of the old games he had on his phone but they all felt dull. He tried to sleep the time away but that didn’t work either. His body was the only part of him that was tired.
Guess it’s just one of those days.
He knew this feeling well. It was like a deep pit in himself that truly was insatiable. Almost nothing in this town was ever enough for him. It needed to be more. But the old town was just too bleak for anyone to try.
The blonde cracked a smile knowing that pit would turn on him at this rate. It wouldn't be so hard. His father's gun collection was never locked after all.
Stan flopped his hand to his neck to check for his pulse, and sure enough there was one.
Don’t know what I expected.
Self-pitying jackass.
Buzz buzz
Stan rolled his neck to look at the screen, not expecting anything more than a notification from a random app he swore he had uninstantiated.
Spam likely texted:
The body of the message was hidden until Stan typed in his password. It wasn’t anything more than just a map emoji but it was enough. Stan swiped his finger and deleted the chat again.
Good timing as always Xe.
Stan threw his arms up to get the momentum to sit up. “Nggk,” Stan groaned realizing he had sat up too quick. “But you couldn’t ‘ve texted earlier?”
Stan picked up his phone and took his jacket from his bed.
His legs felt a bit shaky from not using them for a while but after a few stumbles, he gained his footing.
Stan was careful to open with enough force so as not to make the damn hinges squeak. His shoes were already by the front door so he just needed to slip them on and-
“Hold it Stan,” His mom called from the living room. “Where are you going?”
Stan exhaled. He had hoped he could’ve just skipped this step. “Just going out for a walk,”
“Are you going to meet someone?” She questioned more, looking her son up and down as if she was looking for a big sign that just said delinquent. “It better not be-,”
“Nope, just me mom,” Stan didn’t care to hear the rest.
She frowned before a sigh softened her features. “Alright alright. Do you have your phone on you?”
“Yes mom,” Stan flashed the phone above his head to show off.
“Hmmm…. Okay but leave your jacket here,” She pointed to the jacket rack that might as well have been exclusively his at this point,
“You’re kidding? It’s like 60 out there,” Stan protested.
“Your mother asked you to leave it. Leave it Stanley,” Stan’s dad added.
“Fine,” Stan groaned, slipping the jacket off to put on the rack. “Just know I’m blaming yall when I get a cold tomorrow,”
“Just don’t catch one then,” Stan’s snark was thrown right back at him. “And make sure to be back for your dinner,”
“Ya ya old man,” Stan dismissed before clicking open the lock and stepping out.
As he closed the door behind him, the chill of the breeze caught up to him. “Aww crap,” Stan muttered to himself. “Should’ve thought this through,”
Despite the less-than-perfect weather, Stan started his trek. The destination, on paper, wasn’t too far, but it was avoiding coming too close to a certain house that was the issue. It used to be as easy as following the trail that went behind Xeno’s house but when an app tracks your movements, best not to go near the local outcast.
Long way behind the old church it was.
He tried to ignore the pounding in his head as his foot would crunch the old autumn leaves. They had basically covered the path by that point and stepping around them was too much hassle for the blonde going through withdrawals. As unreasonable as his parents were, they were right about the jacket with a bunch of hidden pockets for keeping cigarettes.
Point, them.
Stan came to an almost fork in the path. The live oak tree was right between the two “paths”.
Trees’ definitely seen better days.
Stan thought, noting the crude heart engravings. It was a pity since it really did stand out against the rest in Stan’s eyes. It helped that it hadn't changed much over the years compared to the other trees that had been cut and pruned.
Stan noticed the fresh boot prints on the newly laid leaves. Stan smirked a bit noticing how wide the strides were. The other of the pair was definitely excited about something.
Stan took the left ‘path’ if you could still call it that. It had once been a pretty maintained trail with it being to the church’s former sport shed. However, over the years of neglect, it wasn’t uncommon to have to duck a few branches or step around some poison oak.
Stan kept glancing between the ground to the area in front of him until he came upon a familiar shed. One of those finds you find as a kid and you joke it’s your base. Only they hadn’t grown out of the joke. It was behind the church so didn’t have to worry about people stealing his cigarettes to smoke. Plus a bit of a venture to find with all the overgrowth.
“Yo Xe,” Stan knocked on the front door.
“Finally,” The click of the lock sounded before Xeno opened the door. “Took you a while,” Xeno pointed out. Stan was a little surprised to see Xeno had traded his normal lab coat for a black hoodie.
Of course Xeno had been counting. “Ehh parents on my ass,” Stan shrugged, stepping into the little space.
“Can you blame them?” Xeno hummed “You are sneaking to the woods to meet the local lunatic,”
“Lunatic?” Stan raised a brow.
“It’s what everyone in the town refers to me as” Xeno explained so nonchalantly it felt like any other science fact he’d rattle on about. His expression just as even as his tone.
“What do they know?” Stan pulled out the half used packet of cigarettes from the table’s drawer. “We live in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of jackasses who’ll probably never leave this town,” Stan stood by the windowless pane before lighting the cigarette. He took a quick drag to relieve some of the pressure in his head. “So who cares what they think,”
“Agreed,” Xeno hummed. “Though there is no need to get worked up on my behalf Stan,” Xeno reached up for a tarp on a higher shelf.
“Tck,” Stan clicked his tongue. “Just pisses me off. Not saying it just for you,” Stan groaned. “Almost nothing about this town makes sense,”
“Science makes sense,” Xeno argued, finally getting the tarp down.
Whatever Xeno was holding was not only hidden under a tarp, but also tied up in a rope. Not to mention the sound of clinking metal as it shifted. Xeno also looked away too excited for it to be just another collection of parts he had found in the local junkyard.
Stan smirked. “Tell them that,”
“I’ve tried,” Xeno started to undo the knot. “But there’s no point trying to teach the willfully ignorant,”
“I like the way I described them better,” Stan stated playfully.
“Yes, very elegant Stan,” Xeno sarcastically remarked with a deadpan look on his face.
“Am I wrong?” Stan took the last inhale of smoke,
“No, but decorum Stanley,” Xeno remarked. “Plus people often understand what they choose to believe. Especially in a town like this,”
“Guess that makes sense,” Stan shrugged, putting out the cigarette “You’re what I believe in after all”
“And science,” Xeno reminded glancing over at Stan.
“Nope, just you,” Stan embraced Xeno from behind.
“Come now Stan, I know you understand science,” Xeno put his hand over Stan’s around him.
“I do, but you are what I choose to believe in,” Stan restated. “Kinda gotta believe in science with you,”
“You better,” Xeno huffed. The two let the silence hang in the air for a second. Xeno ran his hand over the chilled skin so gingerly- “And you promise?”
Xeno was a pretty arrogant person. Even since they were kids, Xeno saw others who didn’t bother with science as below him. Even mouthing off to those bigger than him. It’s how he had got his reputation as the town’s outcast. Other kids, teachers, priests, didn’t matter who. Xeno was right because science told him he was. And Stan was fine with that. Stan was pretty sure even Xeno would agree with that assessment. All that mattered to Xeno was his way and if you did not believe in his ways, you were wrong.
And that part about him never changed. He was just as arrogant as always.
“Promise,” Stan answered, hiding his face in his partner’s neck “You know I need you right? Just like this. Just the way you are,”
Xeno felt like the only warm thing against the chill edge of the breeze. Stan nuzzled his face in more trying to bask in that warmth.
“I know my dear,”
“You promise?” Stan parroted back.
“I promise,”
“Good,” Stan lifted his head from where it hid. “I love you,”
“I love you too,” Xeno cradled Stan’s face in his hand. Stan had long known the effect Xeno could have on him. As if he was made of clay under Xeno’s hands. “Never forsake what you need ,” Never being sent to a kiln to let him take any one shape. Forever not quite solid for as long as he was with the scientist. Xeno shifted in Stan's hold to face him. “Do you understand me Stan?”
“Yes,” Stan lamented.
“Good,” Xeno snuck his fingers to the back of Stan’s head and pulled him in for a kiss.
Stan didn’t care if he’d forever be formless, as long as he could keep his faith.
If Xeno pulled him closer then his form would be whatever fit. Fitting the shape Xeno made while he ran his hand down to Stan’s sternum. Like he too was trying to find a pulse. Stan leaning his hands on the edge of the desk to keep himself up. The sudden movement shifted the tarp on the desk.
Clink.
Xeno broke the kiss. “Oh yes, the surprise!”
Stan frowned a bit from the loss of contact but he was curious what Xeno had called him out here for.
Xeno quickly un-did the last knot and pulled it out. “You know one of my favorite things about science is how it levels the playing field in wars , combat, or even hunting. Didn’t matter how strong your opponent was, or how many men they’d killed. A well aimed small piece of metal going 1000 miles an hour would win,” Xeno moved so Stan could see what looked to be a homemade hunting rifle. “That said I never got to appeal behind guns when there’s much more interesting methods but it’s not a gift for myself,”
Stan pushed the rifle over to the other side. “Heh, you engraved it too,” Stan turned it back.
“It is a habit,” Xeno pointed out.
“I noticed,” Stan smirked. “But damn Xe, you actually made me a rifle,” Stan said, careful not to put his finger anywhere near the trigger as he picked it up. “No way this is legal,” Stan took a second to feel how it was pressed to his shoulder. Unsurprisingly it fit him pretty well.
“It’s not,” Xeno added, rather coyly. “Here’s to hoping I’m not on any watch lists again,”
“Oh you’re for sure still on there,” Stan playfully scoffed. “And now you’re dragging me into as well,”
“Sounds right,” Xeno replied, his arms folded against his chest. He looked rather pleased with himself.
“God man, still can’t believe you made this,” Stan ducked his head to the gun’s level to get a look through the scope. The view was crystal clear though the lines on the scope were clearly not as sharp as a professional one. “You really made all of this huh?”
“Yes, so forgive any mistakes. Weaponry isn’t my forte,” Xeno added.
“Could’ve fooled me,” Stan snickered, putting it back down.
“Yes- well in any case, happy birthday Stan,” Xeno hid his hands in his jacket’s pockets.
“Oh yeah, that’s today huh?” Stan thought out loud.
“Don’t tell me you forgot,” Xeno raised a brow.
“Whaaa~? I would never,” Stan sang like he cared to hide that fact. “Had a countdown and all that jazz,”
“I guess I’ll have to take your word for that,” Xeno didn’t bother to hide his exasperation either. “Now if it’s not too forward, I’d like to see you use it,”
“Sounds fine to me,” Stan took the rifle from the table. “I’m assuming you already have a target in mind,”
“Very astute,” Xeno praised, starting to step out of the shed.
Stan pocked two cigarettes into his pockets for the road. “Nah just know ya too well,” Stan replied, catching up behind him. “Probably also why you’re not wearing your lab coat,”
“Even so,” Xeno locked the door behind them.
The two of them started the trek of hunched backs and walking as if on a minefield until they reached the fork in the path. Stan unhunched his back and once again noticed the tree from before.
“Yo Xe,”
“Hmh?” Xeno paused his hike for a second to look back to see what Stan was looking at.
“You think this tree has changed any?” Stan asked. “You know, besides the graffiti,”
“I mean assuming it’s been here for a couple of decades-,”
“No, I mean like since we found this place. I noticed it while I passed by. Looks the same to me,”
“Ahhh I see,” Xeno took a second to study the tree. “It’s changed,” Xeno turned to start his hike again. “The top branch used to be thinner,”
Stan gave it a quick look trying to see if that sparked anything. “How can you tell?”
“You used to tease me about how I couldn’t reach it,” Xeno called behind him.
“Oh yeah…,” Stan believed Xeno but he didn’t remember that. Come to think of it -how did they find this place again? Stan turned to ask Xeno but he was too far ahead of him. “Geez hold up will ya!?”