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At first, it was a fleeting thought.
‘How was Aqua doing? What’s he doing now?’
Melt stared into those eyes, feeling the darkness seep through his clothes and skin, leaving him with a bone-chilling sensation he couldn’t quite name. It wasn’t the rain, nor the gloominess of the location. It was him .
He couldn’t see his face too well at first, too focused on his own untameable ego. Out of everything, filming was the last thing on his mind. He worried over his hair and the rain droplets, the leaking of the roofs messing his makeup or his belongings. Oh, how he hated his past self so much.
Aqua reeked of darkness and obscurity, hatred and jealousy dripping from every orifice as he acted, and for the first time… for the first time, Melt faced his own ineptitude—the inadequacy of his own acting. He watched as the blond’s face loosened and all those emotions drained away with a flick of a switch, leaving someone, still somewhat shrouded in darkness, but with a tinge of melancholy that escaped his wall of inscrutability.
There was something about him that jump-started Melt’s heart. Something inside him soared, yet the very same thing ached, because why did he look so sad?
Whatever thought he had came to a full stop when Aqua looked up, their eyes meeting for the first time.
Pretty , he thought.
Pretty , he thought again.
Seeing Aqua’s face properly was like being run over by a car. Long blond hair, loosely, if at all styled, but it was perfection, giving the kind of effortlessness that Melt aspired toward. The strands curled at the ends, perhaps due to the weather, or maybe the hoodie. But more than anything, it were those eyes that stood out to him the most.
Blue like the ocean , like the underwater documentaries his teachers used to show when he still went to school properly. They sparkled like the stars in the skies, shining brighter against the darkness that curled deep inside.
Melt was drawn to them.
But he was an asshole first and foremost and a terrible actor second. By the end of Sweet ToDay and the celebratory party, he couldn’t find it in himself to approach Aqua, too deep inside his own shame and his inadequacy to even think of the other, even though his heart yearned for it.
Things happened like a blur, and Melt couldn’t remember most of it.
He remembered thinking of him more and more. ‘How’s he doing? What’s he doing?’
A dating show. Tokyo Blade.
Aqua, who seemed so infallible and unapproachable at first, looked more like someone who desperately needed someone to hold onto him.
There was tension during rehearsals—everyone knew but they didn’t dare to speak them out loud, much less around him. And Melt understood. To them, he was just a face, a guy who got his role because of his looks and far from his ability, but even though they didn’t say anything to him , it didn’t mean that he didn’t hear it around him .
Aqua and his stilted acting, the dullness of his eyes, the clammy pallor of his skin. The way he collapsed, breaking down during rehearsals like something went terribly wrong.
Melt didn’t understand, but he wanted to .
‘Are you okay? What happened?’
And then Tokyo Blade ended with impressive reviews—the audience raving over the set, the immersion, and the actors. Melt’s connection to Aqua ended, just like that.
He thought of Aqua more and more, wishing desperately to learn more about the enigmatic teenager, who was almost like twilight personified. He shone like the brightest star in the galaxy when he wanted to, capturing everyone’s attention with a wave of his hand, yet there was something obscured in the shadows that had everyone wanting for more . Melt was no different.
He kept up with Aqua’s content, every show, theater production, movie, and TV appearance he kept up with. He consumed them all with a fervor he didn’t know he had, like a sponge to water…
Like a moth to flame .
Just like that, Aqua became more and more of a distant and far away figure. And Melt, just to come close, had to run and claw his way through. It wasn’t enough. Aqua was getting better and better, his eyes shining brighter with every acting job. And Melt…
Melt felt like he was still stuck in Sweet Today, even if he knew that he had gotten somewhat better since then. He felt like there was a wall keeping him from reaching Aqua, and with every day, every week, Aqua was walking further and further away, and it wouldn’t be long before he was too far like the stars in the skies for Melt to ever catch up. For him to ever come close.
‘Aqua, Aqua, Aqua ,’ he thought, again and again.
Aqua and Ruby were the children of the late idol, Hoshino Ai, and everything just made sense . The darkness… sorrow…
Melt couldn’t do anything. What could he even do? I’m sorry for your loss? It’s been a decade since, and it wasn’t like he cared about idols when he was a kid. But Melt wanted to say something— anything .
‘Are you okay?’ He thought when he saw Aqua the next time in person. His eyes were different from the movies. More vivid. More… dangerous .
‘Tell me something… anything .’
…
‘Is this how you felt?’
The hatred reeking from the script, the sheer vitriol and venom. Melt held something incomprehensible in his hands, and he wasn’t quite sure what to even say. Under all that darkness, was this what Aqua hid, deep inside himself?
The script was a weapon, but Melt couldn’t help but want more . Having a taste of the darkness, he wanted to see more of Aqua because he was hopelessly drawn to him, even despite the obvious dangers. He wanted nothing more than to be by Aqua’s side, to be with him no matter what.
‘Really… you’re so good.’ He thought to himself during the screening.
Everyone was so good, their faces almost unrecognizable. Yet, his eyes were drawn toward Aqua, who seemed like a completely different person. Blue deceitful eyes, so much more youthful than the weary ones on the actor himself.
Melt would crawl and claw if he needed to. He wanted to get closer—close enough that he could form a bond with him.