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She started noticing, she thought, during Area Zero. It wasn't surprising the four of them had grown so close — that experience had been nothing short of life-changing. Particularly for Arven.
So maybe it made some sense, then, that he started to think about her differently. Juliana had been the one there for him more than anyone else, had been the one to see his journey before Area Zero and to learn bit by bit about who he was and what he'd gone through. To then see his dreams of maybe having a relationship with his father crumble into dust right in front of her had hurt, but Juliana had done her best to be there for him.
He was, first and foremost, one of her best friends.
At first, she'd been honestly terrified that he only latched on because she had been there. Both Nemona and Penny had given her the most impressive deadpan stares to ever grace her vision, but she thought it had been a genuine concern. After all, that was a lot to discover in one day — especially with other people around to see it, and almost dying in the process.
It had been a few years since then, though, and Juliana was beginning to understand the depth of Arven's feelings. Things between them hadn't changed. He was still one of her closest friends, they still spent a lot of time together on adventures or battling or cooking. She still felt like she could lean on him when she needed to, and he still felt comfortable talking to her late into the night about his regrets regarding his father.
There wasn't much left in the world she found herself afraid of. She had become a Champion-rank Trainer, she trusted her Pokemon implicitly, and she'd been through the depths of Area Zero among other near-disasters and come out on the other side to tell the tale. Juliana prided herself, even, on being a resilient kind of girl. She may only have been fifteen, but she could keep up with the best of the best.
Terrified did not even begin to cover the way she felt about potentially confessing her own feelings to Arven.
It was stupid, really. The feelings were clearly requited — Nemona would laugh loud enough to alert the entire academy if Juliana were to even pretend otherwise — but Arven was… he was important, and he'd been through enough. To her, he deserved time to sort things out after the catastrophe that was his father's death.
But Juliana, Penny would stress, rolling her eyes so far back they disappeared completely, it's been years. Shouldn't that be enough time?
Probably, she could concede, but then she would see Arven smiling brightly at her and only her when she walked into a shared class, or when he'd pack her a lunch during exam season because he knew she was always too frazzled to remember to eat if not reminded, or when they'd just go traversing Paldea together in search of new Pokemon or good battles.
Her heart would feel like it was going to beat so hard it would fall out of her rib cage, and she'd do her best to school her expression into something decidedly platonic and not bright red, and she'd tell herself that she never wanted to lose this — that she would never want to push him before he was ready. She'd wait until he was.
After all, if he was ready now, he would've said something. Definitely.
"You look tired," Arven said in lieu of a greeting, surveying Juliana carefully. "Are you sure you're up for this?"
He wasn't wrong. She'd cringed at herself in the morning while getting dressed. Her hair had been a right mess, the braided style she'd been wearing since her first year at Naranja was sloppily done as she'd been rushing out the door. While she didn't normally care much about her appearance — especially when it was around someone as close to her as Arven — she mentally cursed herself anyway for making him worry.
It was so hard to pretend everything was normal between them when he looked at her like that.
So, Juliana gave him a wan smile. For some reason, sleep had not come very well to her the night before — that seemed to be happening to her a lot, when she had plans with Arven the next day. "I'm just fine! A little sleepiness won't stop me," she reassured him, trying to brighten her smile.
His expression softened in an instant, and her heart fluttered in her chest. "If you're sure," he agreed, only the slightest touch of hesitance in his tone. "But if you need to rest—"
She laughed, patting his upper arm lightly. As usual, her touch lingered for a second too long to be just friendly, but Arven didn't seem to notice. "I know, I know. I'll make sure to tell you, I promise."
Without waiting for him to reply, Juliana set out to grab them a taxi.
Arven was really starting to wonder how much more obvious he could possibly get before Juliana caught on. She laughed as she always did, smiled in that bright way that he'd come to love so much, and did not even flinch when he was positive his gaze stayed on her for way more than a platonic look-over.
It was, without a doubt, frustrating, but he couldn't find it in himself to just… say something.
Back when they'd been going through Area Zero, trying to figure out the mystery his father had left out for him to solve, he'd been grateful for Juliana's presence. He'd realized it then, maybe — how he was always angling himself towards her, always watching out of the corner of his eye. He'd just been a bit too preoccupied to unpack it at the time.
Now, it had been so long, he wasn't sure if he even should. Juliana had never shown interest in another person, despite how sociable she was, but that didn't necessarily mean anything. Even if there wasn't someone else she was interested in, Arven cherished her too much. The idea of pushing her away was terrifying.
Looking at her, his heart clenched painfully in his chest. The idea of suddenly not having Juliana in his life made him queasy.
Bright sunshine caught her hair just right from the taxi, illuminating it a bit, to almost look like some kind of halo. Her eyes sparkled as she kept talking, excited about the expedition they were going on. Exam season had kept her cooped up too much, she was saying, and she was thankful to him for giving her a reason to get some fresh air again.
It was so easy. Things between them were natural. Would he really risk ruining it?
"Oh, we're almost there," she said, snapping him out of his reverie. He always forgot how quick taxis were, since he was so used to traveling by foot.
Arven nodded. The air was already colder, even from inside the protection of the taxi carriage. Glaseado Mountain was freezing on a good day, and he found himself hoping they'd dressed well enough. Juliana tended to get cold.
Once they were on solid ground, he looked around, trying to gather his bearings. "There's a cave somewhere," he said slowly, trying to map the route in his head. "I hear there's a rare Dragon-type that lives there, so I wanted to try observing it. Figuring out what kind of food it likes."
He didn't want to be a professor — after everything, who could blame him — but part of catching up on humanities credits was learning the ins and outs of relationships and communication. He couldn't become a master chef if he didn't know the tastes of every kind of Pokemon, in his own opinion. So Pokemon that people rarely saw was a topic of fascination, one that he knew Juliana enjoyed just as much. Enough to tolerate the snow of Glaseado Mountain, anyway.
Plus, the research side of things was fun. The Violet Book was full of so many mysteries, so many of them sounding completely ludicrous. They'd lived through some of them, but they were still hard to believe. There was something satisfying about proving something in the book right or wrong, and since he was still on his own treasure hunt, to become something he could be proud of, he was trying to take Juliana's encouragement and chase after it.
He was, after all, the only one out of them who wasn't amazing. Nemona, top of their school, Champion rank her very first year, much like Juliana, and always going about to get stronger. Penny was so smart she was hired by the Pokemon League, of all places. And Juliana?
Well, he certainly didn't need to try and figure out what she had going for her. One of the best Trainers he knew, studied hard and got grades good enough to give Nemona a run for her money, and had almost completed the PokeDex already. What couldn't she do?
"That sounds good," the object of his thoughts agreed, nodding. She gestured at him to lead the way. The snow crunched under their feet as they walked in comfortable silence.
Arven had always liked the mountains. The snow gave the world a quiet blanket, and back before Area Zero, it was the easiest time to collect his thoughts. The one thing he didn't like was the lack of plants to study for their health benefits, but the ones that did exist in cold climates were interesting enough on their own, he supposed.
Survival, it seemed, was ingrained into every living creature. He looked at Juliana, a few steps behind him, looking at the side of the mountain intensely trying to find the cave he wanted to go to. He wondered what the plants that lived there wanted so badly to survive for, or if it was just natural instinct — living, without really living.
He'd been like that, once. Struggling to go through the motions to search for a cure for his Mabostiff, who once upon a time had been his everything. And thanks to Mabostiff, he'd met his best friends. He'd met Juliana. He'd even gotten closure on his father.
It was easy to get lost in sentimental thought in the snow, too — another reason he liked being up there.
"Oh!" Juliana exclaimed, pointing over towards the wall. "That's it, right?"
Blinking, Arven strained his eyes trying to see. "Probably," he said with a shrug. It had been the only cave they'd seen since they arrived, so he figured they should take their chances.
The smile she gave him was as blinding as the sun. "Great! Let's head in!" Without waiting for him to reply, she bounded off, full of energy despite how tired she'd seemed when they'd met up earlier.
Following her, he couldn't help but smile.
The cave was smaller than she'd expected it to be. When Arven had said cave, she'd assumed he'd meant, well, a cave system. The ones she'd been through were on Glaseado Mountain, anyway — it was weird to see a cave just by itself on the same mountain. Still, it was at least a good protection from the chilly wind that had started picking up by the time she'd pointed this out, and there was a small Frigibax, as Arven had thought.
Frigibax was so cute, Juliana couldn't help but think. It was wary, of course, but when they didn't approach it and continued to talk quietly amongst themselves, it started coming a bit closer every so often to check them out.
Of course, it being a cave also meant that every sound was a tad… amplified. When her stomach growled, it reverberated off the walls in an embarrassingly loud fashion. She laughed, sheepish, even as Arven didn't appear fazed at all.
"Good thing I always come prepared," he said dryly, pulling off his backpack to begin digging out sandwich-making ingredients.
Juliana knew her mouth was watering just looking at the unprepared food. Perhaps she should've eaten a bit more before she rushed out the door. Even the Frigibax, who had still been keeping itself an arm's reach away, came up a little closer at the smell of food.
She turned to it, smiling in a way she hoped was gentle. "Arven's cooking is the best," she whispered to it, laughing quietly when it did a little jump at being directly addressed.
Arven rolled his eyes good-naturedly. "You think you're getting food for free?" He raised an eyebrow, and Juliana laughed a bit louder. "Nope, you've gotta get better at making lunches eventually with how much traveling you do. Let's make some together."
On the cold ground of the cave, he'd spread out his thick blanket, opening containers with various ingredients and laying them out so they were ready to go. The only thing on the plates he'd set so far was bread.
And, well, he had a bit of a point. She really needed to stop relying on others — mostly him — when it came to keeping herself well-nourished on her travels. She was decent at making sandwiches, at least enough that Miraidon always seemed excited, but they weren't very good. Arven's always had good flavor, the right amount of everything. Hers were…
Well, her latest go-to was simply mayonnaise and cheese on bread. Meanwhile, Arven had laid out various vegetables and even some eggs, alongside a few different bottles of sauces and condiments. How was he always five steps ahead when it came to food?
"Alright, alright," she said, pushing herself up off the ground. She walked over to him slowly, so as to not scare Frigibax off, sitting herself back down next to Arven and his impressive spread. "What's class on today?"
He grinned cheekily. "Construction," he told her, picking up the bottle of mayonnaise he had laid out. "You like this best, right?" At her nod, and mild blush, and continued. "I promise it's pretty easy to make a nice-looking sandwich. I know Miraidon will appreciate it," he said, leveling a pointed look towards her own bag, lying on the ground with her PokeBalls inside for the time being. Without waiting for any other reply, he began putting the mayo on his bread, getting a perfect spread first try.
When he handed off the bottle to Juliana next, their fingers brushed. Neither of them pulled back right away. Juliana could only hope Arven knew why she was letting it sit for a moment — maybe then she would know for sure where they stood. Maybe then he'd actually want to tell her.
Was she any better? Not really, but she thought she was doing the right thing by keeping it to herself. But perhaps it was a bit of an unfair ask; expecting Arven to break the tension that always seemed to fall over them when they were alone all by himself.
It felt like they held the bottle for an eternity, letting their fingers gently ghost against the other. He was always so warm. Even in a place like this, even somewhere like his fingers. Juliana had always thought it was a good representation of who he was as a person. Warm, and comforting, just like the sun. One could always be sure it was going to come up the next morning, even if it was behind clouds or rainy skies.
Eventually, Arven dropped his hand back to his side, and she began — poorly — pouring out the mayonnaise onto her own bread. She could practically hear him wincing as she did so in a large glob, and then wincing again when she tried to spread it around evenly only to have the left be completely covered and the right barely having any to go around.
"You're hopeless," he said, shaking his head. If it had been anyone else, she might've been offended. Unfortunately for her, he was right.
With the base layer on, she watched and mimicked him to put the rest of the ingredients on, trying to balance it properly so nothing would fall. "Making sandwiches should not be this hard," she whined under her breath, placing the last tomato too far off to the side, making it look like it would fall at a moment's hesitation.
Arven, of course, could only chuckle. "It's not," he told her, but not before placing a toothpick perfectly in the center of his own. "You just don't practice enough."
His sandwich, obviously, looked like something out of a magazine. He'd always been like that, since the first day they'd met — when it came to food, Arven was no doubt a bit of a perfectionist.
Juliana's, on the other hand, looked like a very, very poor interpretation of his. She'd never been very neat, and it certainly showed. That didn't mean it didn't taste good, she reminded herself. She'd just have to wait and see if fancy ingredients made any difference at all.
As they were bringing up their concoctions to finally eat after all their hard work, a sudden gust of wind blew in strongly from the opening of the cave. Juliana and Arven both looked up, alarmed, nodding at each other on who would take which side. Her PokeBalls sat comfortably in her bag, but she knew they'd let themselves out if something dangerous were to happen. Miraidon especially, the overprotective baby that he was.
It turned out to be absolutely, positively nothing. Nothing but snow, of course.
Somehow, in the time they'd been studying Frigibax, talking between themselves, and making themselves lunch, the light flurries they'd walked through on the way further up the mountain had turned into a full-blown snowstorm.
"That doesn't look great," Juliana remarked, watching the outside with great interest. The wind was fully howling, by that point. The snow itself seemed to be flying in all directions with its intensity.
Arven sat back down, reluctant. "We probably shouldn't leave in this," he said, weariness setting in almost immediately.
For some reason, the idea that he was upset by this turn of events made Juliana's heart clench painfully in her chest. Had she really been reading him wrong this whole time…? Her laugh was a bit stilted and awkward, and he gave her a curious look.
"After we eat, we can make ourselves comfortable," she said, trying hard to keep her normal, chipper mood in place. She'd certainly been in worse situations before out in the wild — her entire descent into Area Zero and everything that happened after was a testament to that.
She'd never been stuck like this with an Arven who she had fallen in love with, though. Who she was now not sure felt the same, despite her usual confidence on the matter. Would he have sounded so upset if he was happy to be trapped with her?
Shaking herself, both physically and mentally, Juliana nodded before taking a bite out of her sandwich. It wasn't constructed as well as Arven's, obviously, but the flavor combination he'd chosen was well suited to her as it always was.
"Thanks for your help," Juliana said in between bites. Arven nodded, giving her a small and tired smile.
Once she was nearing the end of her sandwich, she broke off some, holding it out for the small Frigibax. Both she and Arven kept themselves quiet, watching as it gingerly took the offering from her hand before turning away to eat it.
"You're always so good with Pokemon," Arven said, sounding almost wistful. "No wonder you made it to Champion rank so easily. You're gonna leave us all behind in the dust, at the rate you're going." He dusted off invisible crumbs before putting the various tupperwares he'd had back in the cooling bag.
She couldn't help but snort at that sentiment. She'd reached Champion rank what felt like eons ago, but she hadn't cared to truly leave Paldea. Not yet, anyway. "Not a chance," she told him, the words falling a bit flatter than the joke tinged with honesty she'd hoped for.
Arven gave her a smile, but it didn't meet his eyes. He shook out the blanket for any remaining crumbs, before heading over to the wall furthest from the entrance. "You've always been too good for us," he murmured, almost too quiet for her to hear.
Still, Juliana followed his lead, sitting down next to him close enough that their arms were touching. He was as stiff as a board, and she had a feeling she was faring no better.
Maybe she really should say something.
Things had never felt quite so stilted between them before. Awkward, maybe a few times — maybe more than a few times — but not this odd, out-of-sync feeling she was having. Was it because she wasn't being honest with him? Could he tell that she was holding something back, and that's why he was worried she'd go off without them.
Even if she wasn't in love with Arven. Juliana couldn't imagine doing that. Not forever, anyway. Traveling was something she loved, finding Pokemon and battling were things that she never wanted to stop experiencing, but not without her friends. They'd been through so much together, going off to a new region without Arven, Nemona, and Penny seemed wrong, somehow. Even if they weren't all taking on a Gym Challenge, even if they were off doing their own things, being in the same region felt better. More together.
She sighed a bit, lost in thought, and Arven went completely rigid before relaxing again. Why had he…
Oh. Juliana felt her cheeks warm, but couldn't find it in her to move. In her thoughts, she'd ended up leaning her head against his shoulder. It shouldn't be weird to do that with a friend, she told herself, but she knew that most friends didn't feel this sort of way about each other. She certainly didn't feel that way towards Nemona or Penny.
With Arven, she felt safe. She felt, almost more importantly, understood. Seen. He was her best friend, first and foremost, and there was nobody else who knew her quite this well. She liked to think she knew him just as well, after everything, and that meant something to her. To be so trusted, to have been witness and a deep part of so many breakthroughs and realizations, it was important to her. Their relationship was important to her, which was why she was so nervous about bringing it up.
But she needed to, she realized. She really had to tell him. Letting this fester anymore wasn't something she wanted to do — not if he was worried about her up and leaving. She almost scoffed to herself, the idea completely preposterous.
"You cold?" Arven asked quietly, though with the silence of the cave it seemed to be the loudest thing in the world.
She shook her head, pretending she wasn't also nuzzling her cheek into his shoulder as she did so. "Not anymore," she said. "Not when I'm with you."
It was probably the most forward she'd ever been, but maybe, maybe he'd get the hint on his own. That would be ideal. Arven brought his unoccupied arm up to cough awkwardly into his hand, clearing his throat, and then they were quiet again. The storm outside continued, and Juliana could barely see which way the snow was falling from anymore.
They'd be there for a while, then.
"Hey."
"I really—"
They both started at the same time, cutting each other off. Arven chuckled, and the light movement of his shoulder made Juliana laugh with him. She didn't want him to think she wanted to lose this. She didn't want him to worry that she was waiting for the day to go and make something else of herself, when she had everything she needed in Paldea already.
"You first," Juliana told him after a moment. Maybe, she hoped, she could assuage his fears a bit and she wouldn't have to tell him that she knew how he felt before he was ready.
Arven let out a withering sigh. "I need to be honest with you," he said, words coming out slowly. For a moment, she considered pushing up off of him to look at him while he spoke, but she was a bit too comfortable — and uncomfortable, mentally — to want to do that. "Uh, there's something that's been on my mind. For a really long time."
Juliana held her breath.
"I love you," he said so quickly the words blurred together. "I've felt that way for a while, but I know you don't feel the same, and that's okay. I don't want you to respond because you feel you have to—"
Wait, what? Juliana did move off of him, at that, to stare at him incredulously. "What, do you think I don't feel the same? You aren't serious, right?" She asked bluntly, completely forgetting her own reservations. The sheer idea that he didn't think she cared about him in that way was so ridiculous, she almost couldn't believe her ears.
Arven looked at her blankly, now, though there was red on his cheeks as he continued. "You would've said something," he said, matter of fact. "If you did, you would've said something, but you haven't, and that's okay. Holding it in was just getting hard."
Never had she wanted to shake someone so badly. "You're joking," she said, wide-eyed. "You were supposed to say something first! You had all that," she flapped her hand vigorously, "at Area Zero happen! I was waiting for you! I thought you knew."
It occurred to her, then, what exactly they were discussing, and she looked down at the blanket to pick at it with her nails.
Similarly, out of the corner of her eye, she saw Arven's hand go behind his neck in awkwardness. "No," he replied stiffly. "I really… you love me?"
Juliana couldn't help it, she snorted. The way he asked made it sound like she was doing him a favor by giving him the time of day, or something. "Who else?" She finally asked in return, looking back up at him. "You're my best friend, after all. Of course it's you."
And really, that's all there was to it. In her mind, Arven was incredible — to come back from the shock of Area Zero and decide to do something completely his own with his life? She didn't think she could be that strong. She didn't think she would've survived that, on her own. Yet there he was, doing what he felt was best for himself, and never turning away from it. Even if he thought he might, or got scared, he still kept going.
He'd always been like that. When they'd first met, going through and finding the Herba Mystica for his Mabostiff, he'd been the same. She'd always, always admired that about him.
Without warning, Arven pulled her into his arms, crushing her against him. Almost on instinct, she wrapped her arms around him, sighing happily.
"This doesn't have to change anything," he said quietly. "I just… really wanted you to know."
She laughed, a little breathless. "Of course it doesn't change anything," she agreed. "Both our feelings are still the same." She paused for a moment, before squeezing him a little tighter. "Well. This can change, I think. We can do this more. If that's okay, I mean."
Juliana was aware she was babbling, but Arven didn't seem to mind. "Yeah," he said, nodding into her hair. "Yeah, that sounds good."
The storm was still going, but neither of them seemed to mind. Sitting shoulder to shoulder again, she laced their hands together, smiling contently to herself.