Chapter Text
Tecchou’s hands were shaking where he had them stuck in the pockets of his itchy dress pants. The hunting dogs were expected to attend some kind of government mixer, and it had been so loud all day. Tecchou rarely had problems getting sensory overload anymore. It used to bother him a lot as a child, but war doesn’t let anyone get away just because they can’t handle the sound of gunfire. Tecchou was forced to learn to cope with his previous issues. He found that if he stared at something hard enough, he could usually tune out the entire world, including whatever sounds and sensations were bothering him.
It didn’t seem to matter how much he stared this time, though. He couldn’t tune anything out. He could hear a million different conversations happening at once, words clashing with each other as the people spoke. He could see the lights, way too bright and also cool in tone, giving him a headache. He could feel every place his ill-fitting suit was touching his skin. It was too much.
His breathing picked up. They’d been at this god-forsaken party for almost four hours now. Fukuchi was already well on his way to drunk, somehow still making friends, while Teruko kept him out of trouble as best as she could (they could not have a repeat of the time he pissed into an official’s plant, and ruined the Hunting Dogs relationship with them forever). Tachihara hadn’t been able to get away from the Mafia for the night, and Jouno was standing next to Tecchou in his corner, people watching (or well people listening). Tecchou had no doubt Jouno could pick out every individual conversation happening in the room, and was using that ability to gather information on all the government officers that were present.
Tecchou was hoping that no one noticed the panic that had been building in his chest for the last two hours. He was always a quieter person, not often caring to share his thoughts, so he hoped no one questioned the fact that he hadn’t said a single word since the party began. He was trying to make sure not a single person picked up on the way his heart was beating out of his chest and his breathing had become increasingly unsteady. If the way Jouno had tilted his head towards him, eyebrows drawn together was anything to go off of, Tecchou had not done a very good job of hiding it. Although it’s probably not fair to consider the man that could hear his heartbeat as proof of his failure to hide his suffering.
The crowd suddenly got louder, probably a reaction to something that had happened, or perhaps it was all in Tecchou’s head, but it made him wince all the same. He couldn’t breathe anymore, vision swimming, and tears building in his eyes, as he decided he couldn’t stand another minute there and made a break for his room.
This party had been unique because it was held in the Hunting Dogs’ building. Most of the time these government mixers were held at fancy venues or on occasion, officials houses, but Fukuchi had offered to hold this one at the Hunting Dogs’ headquarters. This was a small mercy because Tecchou was able to run straight to his room. Although it was part of the problem because it was the only reason Tecchou had been expected to stay the whole time. Tecchou didn’t think too hard about it as he sprinted to the one place he knew would be quiet. All of the Hunting Dogs’ apartments were several floors up, and Tecchou’s was on the other side of the building, so he hoped he wouldn’t be able to hear the party from there. He rushed up the stairs before bursting into his room and slamming the door behind him.
His room was much quieter, but he was still gasping for air. He started stripping the suit off, basically clawing the itchy fabric from his skin as he did. He felt the tears that had been building in his eyes start to slip down his face as he failed to unbutton his button-down, eventually giving up and ripping the shirt open, breaking all of the buttons. Left in just his boxers, somehow he still didn’t feel okay.
He could still hear murmurs from the party, but now he could also hear the air-conditioning, his clock, and cars driving by outside. He was starting to get dizzy from the lack of air, so he leaned against the closest wall, letting gravity drag him to the ground. He was crying harder, and the sound and sensation of his own tears were making it worse. Tecchou’s ears were ringing, and he could still see too much in the dark room. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out the sight of anything.
He hit his head trying to get the ringing to stop. It didn’t help, but the pain was mildly grounding, so he did it again. And again.
Time slowed, as he lost track of where he was or how long he’d been there. He had a splitting headache, but he couldn’t stop pulling at his hair and driving the base of his palms into his temples. Everything was buzzing, and he couldn’t stop crying, as he begged the universe to just let him pass out already. He needed this to be over.
Suddenly there were hands on his wrists, trying to pull his hands from his head. They were covered in some kind of scratchy fabric, so Tecchou yelped, and shook his hands around, trying to escape the sensation. The hands retreated, before returning without their gloves. Tecchou allowed the soft skin of this person to soothe him as they tugged his hands away from where they had buried themselves in his hair.
Then something was placed on his head, and the world went blissfully silent. The hands gently stroked his face, hair, and shoulders slowly pulling him from the ball he’d curled himself into.
Without the sound of the world around him, Tecchou was finally able to ground himself a little. He kept his eyes shut and took several deep breaths. The phantom hands kept softly caressing him, drawing his head to rest on a warm chest. Whoever the person was, they were wearing an incredibly soft t-shirt, and Tecchou let himself nuzzle into the soft texture. He felt the chest shake with soft laughter, but he chose not to think about it.
He knew he should open his eyes and figure out who the phantom hands belonged to, but he was mildly frightened that they’d leave if he did, and he really didn’t want to be alone again. Tecchou let the person’s heartbeat and gentle petting soothe him without knowing who it was.
He got a hold of himself, breathing deeply and slowly, as he gradually stopped panicking. He finally opened his eyes when he finally felt okay enough to look at the shapes in his room without freaking out.
His breath stuttered when he finally looked up at his savior to be met with pure white hair with blood red tips. Of the few people he thought may have come to comfort him, Jouno had not once crossed his mind. As far as Tecchou was aware, Jouno hated his guts. He was always reminding him how annoying his breathing was, distracting his heartbeat could be, and rancid the smells of all Tecchou’s favorite foods were. The idea that the man would go out of his way to help him was unthinkable. But as Jouno’s head tilted towards him, indicating that he’d heard the change in Tecchou’s breathing, he didn’t cease to be real.
“Jouno?”
Jouno raised an eyebrow in the way that Tecchou had learned to associate with being told he’d said something stupid, kind of Jouno’s own personal eye roll. Then Tecchou saw his mouth move as though he was saying something, but he couldn’t hear him.
Before Tecchou could panic, Jouno made an exasperated face, and tapped on his left ear. Tecchou followed Jouno’s move and tapped his own ear, being met with the hard plastic of headphones covering his ears. Noise canceling headphones! Of course! That's why he couldn't hear anything.
He slipped them off, and left them resting around his neck. All at once the sounds of his room came back in, but this time they felt the way they always do, rather than overwhelming. “Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”
“No genuinely, tha-”
“Do not mention it. It’s awful enough to have happened. Please don’t talk about it.”
Tecchou suddenly became aware that he was still leaning on Jouno’s chest, and pushed himself off abruptly, startling Jouno slightly, if the way his eyebrows raised was anything to go off of. Tecchou never could read Jouno all that well.
Tecchou couldn’t tell exactly how put off Jouno was, or how genuine his distaste was (Jouno had a tendency to be mean without sincerely feeling that way), but Tecchou felt bad that Jouno had to deal with his breakdown, either way. He’d forced Jouno to hold him for what could’ve been hours because he couldn’t deal with a little bit of sound.
Tecchou felt a flick on his forehead and startled, realizing he’d been zoning out.
“Stop thinking. It’s not good for your little pea brain.”
“Sorry.” Jouno just raised a single eyebrow at him again, and Tecchou sighed. “Sorry for making you deal with this.”
Jouno’s eyebrow got higher if that was possible, disbelief clear on his usually unemotive face. “You can’t make me do anything.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, ‘oh’.” Jouno said it like it was an insult, as though Tecchou was the stupidest person he knew.
Jouno reached over to a small stack of clothing that Tecchou just noticed on the floor, and started sorting through it. It looked like Jouno’s button-up, suit jacket, tie, and gloves. Tecchou felt the heat rise to his face, as he realized that Jouno had taken all of his clothing made of uncomfortable fabric off, so Tecchou could lay on him.
Tecchou also suddenly realized that he was nearly naked, and was nearly naked the entire time he was laying on Jouno. He stood up and walked to the closet, but when his hands brushed the fabric of his usual undershirt, he pulled back immediately. It was too scratchy. He felt around his closet, realizing that he didn’t have any clothes he felt comfortable wearing right now. His usually soft clothing was still too much for this specific moment. Tecchou felt like an exposed nerve ending.
He sighed in resignation, and decided that he wasn’t going to mess with it right now. When he looked back at Jouno, the man had his button down and gloves back on, holding his suit and tie.
“I think this is my sign to take my leave.”
Tecchou sat down on his bed, and watched Jouno turn to leave wistfully. He wished he would stay. Tecchou loved his company, and after such a terrible day, winding down with Jouno sounded lovely.
His wishes must’ve reflected in his heart or breathing because Jouno turned around at the door, body angled towards Tecchou again.
“If you have something to say, say it.”
“Would you stay?”
Jouno scoffed. “Why would I want to do that?”
Tecchou sighed. “Saigiku...” Jouno’s eyebrows shot up at the use of his given name, “...please.”