Chapter Text
Regulus Black is so done.
The last thing he needs after cramming his entire ten parchment length potions essay within the evening is Argus Filch and that god-forsaken cat giving him a row past midnight.
“My sweet, lead me to the little rulebreaker.”
Distantly, he can hear Filch cooing and a cat’s meow followed by footsteps coming closer to his direction. Regulus internally cringes at Filch’s syrup sweet tone as he shuffles quicker towards the direction of the Astronomy Tower. He keeps his footsteps light like he was taught during waltz classes with the purebloods, and silently thinks that maybe he didn’t waste four hours of his life in a ballroom with a scratchy suit for no reason.
Filch, being actually permitted to roam the halls, makes no attempt whatsoever in covering the sound of his impending footsteps. Regulus can hear them growing closer and closer, mixed with the occasional pieces of praise he offers to Mrs Norris. He takes a turn to the left and almost trips in his haste, scowling as Filch covers more ground within the dark hallways behind him. Regulus makes his way past an old broom closet before doing a double take as he grits his teeth, deciding to try his luck on whether the closet was unlocked. He clumsily reaches for the handle and, to his surprise, it gives easily, opening the door for him as he immediately ducks in.
What surprises him even more is that there happens to be another figure in the closet.
It is none other than an extremely dishevelled James Potter with both eyebrows raised comically high, attention trained on Regulus himself.
Regulus wonders if this day can get any worse.
James looks embarrassingly handsome even in the dim lighting of the broom closet, the only source of illumination being the moonlight coming from the small cracks in the door. His glasses are skewed and hair fluffed up, as if James had run his hand through it countless times whilst biding time in the closet. He was still adorned in Gryffindor robes, despite it being so late. He’s grown from the boy Regulus blamed and cursed under muffled tones in the dead of night for taking away his brother. He thinks he’s done a pretty good job of moving on.
“Baby Black?” James whispers in hushed tones, a cheeky smirk creeping up on his face, “Didn’t know you inherited some of Sirius’s genes.” Regulus is torn between hexing James into oblivion and hexing himself into a puddle of goo to melt and die on the spot. He compromises on pulling his face into a deep scowl as he watches James open his mouth; most likely in a futile attempt for small talk.
“Close your mouth, Filch is coming this way.” Regulus hisses, shooting a look of warning to the boy opposite him. James falls quiet at Regulus’s words and listens closely to realise that indeed, there are another pair of footsteps heading towards them. Regulus drops his focus to the floor in a very good attempt—mind you—in distracting himself from the sunshine boy leaning on the opposite wall of the closet. In retaliation to this, James drops his gaze to Regulus in a not very good attempt to get a read on the younger boy.
Filch’s footsteps grow closer with lantern light beginning to seep through the door’s cracks, “They couldn’t have gone far.” Regulus stiffens automatically as Filch’s voice floods through the thin walls of the closet, “Lead me to them, my sweet.” Regulus hears a loud meow in response to this as the footsteps start up again, this time leading away from the closet.
Regulus waits until the steps can no longer be heard before letting out a bated breath, gaze still trained on the ground, as he dusts himself off and straightens. “If you don’t mind, I’ll be off now.” He allows himself a proper glance at James Potter who still looks slightly shocked at the prospect of meeting his best friend’s ‘perfect’ little brother in a broom closet, hiding from Filch nonetheless, before reaching a hand out for the door. This movement of Regulus’s hand seems to have broken James’s brain stun spell as he reverts to the James Potter everybody knows and loves (not even with the exception of Regulus himself).
“Woah there, Baby Black,” James catches Regulus’s wrist and Regulus feels a tinge of electricity at where their skin touches, “What kind of friend of Sirius’s would I be if I didn’t interrogate you on why you’re here?” James’s cheeky smile makes a full-on comeback as Regulus pulls his wrist away from the older boy’s hand.
The black haired boy glares daggers as best as he can at the sun and crosses his arms, “Not a word to my brother, Potter, or else he’d boil both of us alive.”
Regulus has no idea why he’s still entertaining James in his chatter.
James’s smile grows bigger at his words, retracting his hand and huffing what Regulus can assume is a small laugh. Regulus’s eyes widen a fraction at the sound.
Oh.
Oh.
That’s why. Regulus feels his face redden just a little. He prays it’s not discernable with the lack of Filch’s lantern light. He was foolish to think he could bury a childhood crush beneath layers upon layers of hatred, which Regulus has recently learnt wasn’t even warranted.
“Sirius would never. He loves us too much,” James brags with a crooked smile, eyes shaping more into crescents. Then, he leans more into Regulus’s personal space as he opens the closet door a crack, looking left and right to check the coast. Regulus snorts at the other boy’s comment, “Yeah, sure, but he loves Lupin more.” James peeks his head in from outside the closet, pupils blown wide into saucers.
“You knew?!” James gasps, fully shutting the closet door with a soft bang that makes Regulus wince.
“It was kind of obvious, was it not?” Regulus shrugs, watching as James straightens back into leaning on the wall of the other side.
“Well, yeah,” the sun adjusts his glasses, “But I didn’t think that Padfoot would actually get his shit together to ask Moony out.”
Regulus didn’t know where they could have possibly gotten the nicknames Padfoot and Moony from, however he’d heard it thrown around the castle enough times to know who they were referring to.
“He’s been pining after him for years,” Regulus scoffs, fully aware that Sirius used to gush about the most awesome brown hair boy in his year with the coolest looking scars and even cooler music taste. Regulus listened to David Bowie for the first time after that conversation.
James sighs wistfully, “It’s like watching a movie, the two of them,” the brown hair boy runs a hand through his messy locks, and Regulus resists the urge to relocate a lost strand. “Oblivious idiots, glad they got it together in the end.”
Regulus can’t help but agree. Sirius seems much happier these days, although Regulus can’t seem to soothe that knot in his stomach that says, ‘you couldn’t give him even a fraction of what Lupin is giving in double the time’.
“So, Baby Black,” James drawls, the confidence returning to his stance with a grin, “Now that we’ve gotten small talk out of the way, wanna tell me why you’re here?”
Regulus clears his throat, “I was going to stargaze, at the Astronomy Tower.” He clarifies. The stars are bright at this time of year, but how could they compare to the brilliance of the sun? “If you’re done interrogating me about my brother’s love life, I take it I can leave without you snitching?” A small, tiny, unimportant part of him longs to stay.
To Regulus’s surprise, James shrugs and nods, “Sure, if there’s one thing you and Sirius have in common it’s how stubborn you both are.” Regulus internally agrees to that comment.
The two boys climb out of the closet together, James making sure the coast is fully clear before leaving. Regulus dusts his sleeves off and clasps his hands together in front of him as James straightens his robes.
“See you around then, Potter.” Regulus nods, feeling slightly awkward. James seems somewhat far away, not meeting his gaze fully and a little more submerged in his head, the last embers of a smile still remaining on his face. James hums, waving a hand, “See you.”
Regulus gives him a two finger salute before turning on his heel, back in the direction of the Astronomy Tower, his lips giving way to a small smile once he’s sure James can’t see him anymore.
His mind replays the entire interaction like a broken record as he walks down the path, keeping his footsteps light and agile to not attract any unwanted attention. Regulus didn’t particularly feel like hiding in another broom closet that night. He thinks of his brother, and silently sends a prayer to whatever god was responsible for this because he was so done with hearing about ‘Moony’, ‘Moonshine’, ‘My Moonage Daydream’, and a whole collection of terrible nicknames Sirius has for the one and only Remus Lupin.
He wonders what could have been between him and the rest of Sirius’s friends if he had agreed to leave with Sirius that one fateful day in fifth year. Sirius had quietly opened the door to his room without the courtesy of knocking, and before Regulus could lecture him, young Sirius opened his mouth with blue eyes filled with tears and whispered, “I’m leaving, Reg. I can’t do this anymore.”
Regulus thinks he lost a part of himself that day.
Before he could dwell upon this any longer, Regulus’s body goes taut as he hears footsteps rushing behind him, drawing nearer by the second. Having been attuned to the sound of Filch’s footsteps, Regulus could easily come to the conclusion that it wasn’t him. This sends a sliver of fear into his veins, his mind running with hypotheticals and possibilities of who could be running towards him.
Regulus sneaks a hand into the front pocket of his robes to pull out his wand with a vice grip. He waited until there was still around ten metres of distance between him and the footsteps before turning around with a flourish, wand raised and a steel gaze in a duelling pose.
And of course. Regulus internally bangs his head against the wall. James Potter was back again after a mere few minutes, screeching to a halt with both hands up and a crooked smile on his face that indicated he was indeed up to no good. Regulus reluctantly pockets his wand again with a small scowl as James opens his mouth, still adorning a Cheshire grin, “Fancy meeting you here, Reg. That duelling position was rather uncalled for, don’t you think?”
“Why are you back?” Regulus asks bluntly, praying that the blush on his cheeks was not as obvious as he felt it to be. He crosses his arms across his chest, pointedly ignoring the staccato rhythm his heart just adapted.
“Would you believe me if I said I just wanted to see you?” James responds, face betraying nothing as he finally lowers his hands and perches them on his hips.
“Not at all,” Regulus feels a discreet smile twitch at the corner of his lips as dips his hand back into the pocket of his robes, “But I won’t hesitate on hexing you if you don’t tell me the truth, and lower your voice.”
James whistles and grins, slowly taking steps to close the metres of distance between them, “Feisty, Reg.” Regulus gives him an unimpressed look, slowly pulling his hand from his pocket as James’s smile vanishes.
“Okay, okay,” James reaches where Regulus stands and steps into his personal space, forcefully grabbing his wrist and making him drop the wand before discarding it at the younger boy’s side, “Filch was patrolling around the Gryffindor common room so I thought I would wait it out with you.”
“Do you mean stargazing with me?” Regulus asks as his brain struggles to comprehend what James was asking.
“If that’s alright with you.” The idiot has the nerve to look sheepish now, a hand going to card through his curly brown locks.
Regulus feels his defences crumbling by the second.
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
Tonight turned out more interesting than anticipated, James thinks as he follows Regulus up the mound of stairs leading to the Astronomy Tower. After Regulus agreed to have James stargaze with him (James isn’t sure if the prospect of that has settled into his brain yet), he’s led James on what feels like a super sneaky and secretive route that Filch doesn’t patrol often to keep them both out of more trouble. Considering how much knowledge Sirius stores about different stars and constellations, James can only assume Regulus follows in this aspect.
After a gruelling flight of stairs to the top of a tower, Regulus pushes a large wooden door open to reveal a small viewing deck blanketed by the vast midnight sky. The sky seemed to adorn scattered flecks of sugar, the stars glancing with wonder upon the two of them. James follows Regulus past the door and situated himself on the ground next to the latter.
“Pretty, isn’t it?” Regulus sighs, head tilted up to admire the sea of stars with his legs hugged to his chest.
“Mm, very.” James replies, eyes not leaving Regulus’s form. He took in the long strokes of the younger boy’s hair, ruffled by the soft wind, and his icey blue-grey eyes that both he and Sirius share. James shakes his head and brings his focus back to the space sugar above, not wanting to get caught staring. “Is your star up there?” He questions.
Regulus nods, pointing at a certain patch of the sky, “It’s the brightest star in the constellation of Leo,” He maps out a vague shape with his fingers, “Regulus is visible in nearly all the months of the year, except for when the sun is too close.”
James hums, “Leo is the lion constellation, right?” He thinks back to the many astrology terms and attributes Sirius had told him months ago, sending a small thanks when Regulus nods and goes back to hugging his knees with both hands.
“Yeah,” Regulus snorts, “And apparently I’m the heart of it.” The piece of information makes James’s heart lose its steady rhythm for a split second.
“Heart of the lion, hey?” James chuckles, “Very fitting for you.” Regulus rolls his eyes so high James thinks they’re quite literally reaching for the stars.
They fall into a comfortable silence as Regulus didn’t bother replying to James’s comment, both of them gazing up and admiring the stars as James racks his brain for any astrology knowledge he picked up over the years. He vaguely remembers something about Ursa Major and Minor, the two being some sort of animal James just cannot remember. He feels the need to ask the question that’s been eating away at his happiness for the past few minutes, not allowing him to fully enjoy the stargazing.
“How come you agreed for me to come with you?” James finally questions, tilting his head away from the sky to meet Regulus’s gaze, which was already fixed upon him. “I mean, no offence, but I didn’t take you for the person who would allow anybody to intrude on their personal time.”
But you’re not just anybody, Regulus doesn’t say.
“None taken,” he does say. Regulus chooses his next words carefully, scared of the fact he was lowering barbed shields and opening a sheltered heart to a boy he hated for an embarrassingly long time due to petty jealousy and misdirected anger.
What scared him even more was that he wanted said boy to saunter right through the gates of his heart without a second thought, and that Regulus would let him in without question.
“I wanted to see what kind of person James Potter was,” Regulus begins honestly, eyes dropping to the floor between them, “What kind of person could win over the key to Sirius’s heart so easily?”
James feels his own heart crack a little at the question. He had known that Sirius was leaving Regulus behind when he showed up at the Potter household, eyes dull and brimming with unshed tears, however he had never allowed himself to dwell upon it. He never brought up the topic with Sirius, either, because he knew that so much as speaking his little brother’s name would have Sirius falling silent and drowning in his own misery and regret.
It got better throughout the years, though. It was James and Sirius’s last year at Hogwarts this year, and the brothers have been able to slowly mend their friendship as time went on. He knows they exchange letters frequently through the Black family’s house elf, Kreacher, and that Regulus plans on leaving the house immediately after turning eighteen.
“Regulus,” James murmurs with a sad frown, not sure how to respond to what the younger boy just said. He feels guilt eating away on his insides as he shuffles somewhat awkwardly. James turns his head a little and sees Regulus’s expression is still carefully blank as he blinks up at the night sky.
Regulus tilts his head and seems to refocus on the scenery above them. “Sorry if I made it weird. I wasn’t trying to do that.”
“No, no, don’t worry about it.” James shakes his head immediately, however he can’t bring himself to comment on Regulus’s confession.
Regulus hums, still without a trace of any emotion on his features. James sorts through his mind in search of anything that may cheer Regulus up a little more and get rid of the awkward atmosphere. He pauses for a few seconds, unsure of what to say until he gets an idea.
James reaches into his robe pockets and digs around until he finds his wand. Then, under Regulus’s careful gaze, picks up a stray pebble from the ground and holds it in the palm of one of his hands. He uses the other to wave his wand in small motions, murmuring a spell under his breath.
He breaks out into a huge smile of satisfaction as he watches the pebble contort and start to tremble. James sees Regulus’s eyes blow wide from the corner of his eye as the pebble bursts into a small, origami lion with an exhibit of different shades of greens and silvers.
“Where did you learn how to do that?” Regulus gasps, eyes darting between the newly conjured lion and James like he can’t decide on what to focus on for the time being.
“McGonagall taught Sirius and I, isn’t it cool?” James praises as he runs a gentle finger along the spine of the lion’s back.
He only feels his smile grow even greater if possible as he holds out his palm to Regulus, allowing for the younger boy to reach out and take it before watching Regulus cradle it to his chest like something precious.
“For you,” James watches with distinct interest as Regulus stares at the little lion by his chest like it’s the best thing he’s ever received. “It seems like something you would like.”
Regulus looks like he might cry. James pretends not to notice. “Thank you, Potter.”
Needless to say, Regulus never returned it before calling it a night and retreating back to his dorms. James makes a mental note to make those for him more often.