Work Text:
I. Cold
It’s cold, and Hiyori is seriously regretting thinking that maybe it would be warmer and putting on lighter clothes, because now all she is doing its trembling while those tiny drops of rain fall over the corners of her elbow, once the umbrella is not big enough for both of them.
She sighs, glancing at the dark gray sky while they both walk wordless, as it had been for the last few weeks, for reasons neither of them understand.
Hiyori shivers, shrinking her body in the process. Yato, by her side with less than one inch of distance notices this for sure. She can read his expression as the god wanders what he should do to help her, and all Hiyori can think is that she doesn’t want him to, but wants as well.
She couldn’t even explain her feelings to herself.
“Do you want my coat?” he asks, looking away embarrassed. It was clear to Hiyori the god was in those rare moments of lucidness when he wanted desperately to please her, but was unsure if his endeavor was acceptable. The uneasiness of the last few weeks hadn’t affected the god’s feelings about her, but clearly increased his insecurity.
She inbreathed slowly. Both parts of her screamed yes and no, but the embarrassed look in the god’s face made it clear to Hiyori that if she refused he would feel even worse, as she predicted he would feel after those uneasy weeks. Yato, as she knew him, was probably wondering to himself if he did anything wrong for the past feel weeks.
And he hadn’t, it was her fault this time, to let things get this weird between them. And the next shiver in her body made it clear that the stubbornness of not wanting his coat was only it – stubbornness.
“Yes, thank you.” She said. Yato smiled awkwardly to her and passed the umbrella back to her hands (he was the one holding it, once he was the tallest between them) and strip the upper part of his jersey, hesitating for a moment holding the tissue in his hands, but gently placing it in her shivering hands and taking back the umbrella.
Carefully, Hiyori dresses the coat above her own shirt and zips until her collarbones. The warmth of the attire embraces her softly being welcome by the shivering body. She instantly feels comfy in the bigger clothing.
“…thank you.” She says again, unsure. Yato mumbles a reply clearly less uneasy, but keeps the unnatural distance of half inch between them under the umbrella while they keep walking to Kofuku’s. The same part of Hiyori that wanted Yato to help her not only for the cold desperately begged Hiyori to close that distance and lock her arms with his, bathing in the skin of the god beside her.
That. The feeling of so desperately wanting him, simply wanting him in whatever way the situation would provide took her by the collar and drowned in itself. Hiyori bit her lip, zipping the coat all the way through it and inhaling deeply (but silently) in the god’s scent as if she was trying to appease the urge inside her. It badly worked, making her heart race at effect the scent had on her.
She glanced again to him, who seemed to be immersed in his own thoughts. It was so weird to be in this awkward situation with him – the god himself said he always felt so comfortable in her presence he wouldn’t watch himself and do things without thinking through. Hiyori herself always felt like being with Yato was easy, as if she was simply being led by the stream. Now, it was inverted – Hiyori felt like she should stop the rush of feelings threatening to drag her down the waterfall, and Yato was so reluctant to do anything he was barely speaking to her.
During her glance, the half-phantom noticed how he was already being affected by the warmth, and about that she hadn’t thought – Hiyori was feeling cold for a reason, why on earth wouldn’t Yato be affected as well as long as he lend her his coat?
“You are cold now.” She observed.
“Nothing I can’t endure until we get there”
“I could endure as well.”
“I lent you my coat. You can keep it.” She groaned.
“Fine.”
In a second, they were there simply walking with the half inch distance between their arms. In the other, Hiyori had already embraced the god’s torso with her arm and rested her head in his shoulder.
“I’m not letting you getting cold.” She explained, embarrassed. The god hesitated for a moment, surprised with the sudden change in behavior, but rested his hand that was closer to her in the girl’s hips, as he held the umbrella with the other.
“Thank you.” He said, flustered. It was suddenly way warmer for both.
“You are welcome.”
Hiyori discretely inhaled in Yato’s shoulder, letting herself be caught by the stream of feelings the proximity caused in her for a second. It was easy, huh? Letting herself be caught by the tide. She wondered why it was so hard to resist.
Embraced, both walked in the rain.
II. Late
“Hiyori, would you like to crash in?” asked Kofuku, sleepy, as she leaned back in her kotatsu. The half-phantom smiled and leaned back, lying in the cushioned floor by the side of the goddess.
“I couldn’t” she replied, letting her eyelids fall for a moment of weakness “my mother would have a stroke.”
Kofuku giggled tiredly, turning to her side to get comfier. Hiyori stared at the ceiling as her thoughts mingled with the sound of falling rain. She blinked once, twice, her eyelids heavier at each time she did. When she opened her eyes again, Yato was by her side with a concerned expression in his eyes.
“Hey” he said “you were asleep.”
Hiyori sat up, moving dangerously close to Yato in the process. She blinked twice, trying to awake her heavy eyes and fixating them again in the god’s stare.
The deep hue of his eyes pierced her, speeding up her heart for no reason again. That feeling, the sudden urge of him. Hiyori did not understand what was going on with her, why her thoughts were so clouded by his mere presence or why her hands instinctively went to his, feeling the warmth of the calloused hands of a swordsman.
“I…” she tried, the sleep, the tiring, him, it all was making harder to process her thoughts “…I need to go home.”
He squeezed her hands.
“Ok. I’ll take you home.”
-
They walked side by side, their hands never leaving each other’s as they advanced through the falling rain. It wasn’t that late, but Hiyori appreciated the available stars that shined even through the dark cloud above their city.
They were like Yato – she thought – so bright it would burn her if they were too close. Only being seen in the cloak of darkness that was the night, but so bright even the thickest cloud couldn’t hide.
No – she thought again – He is the moon. He is the light among all darkness.
A feeling of tightening held her chest, almost as if it was suffocating her. She couldn’t tell why, but it was strangely pleasant. She squeezed his hand, as if she needed him to balance her.
They were almost at her house, holding each other’s hand so tightly as if they would never see each other again. Hiyori glanced at Yato, whose eyes were tired, but strangely awaken. She felt that urge of being with him, but it wasn’t that unpleasant now – they weren’t in that awkward silence again, but in the silence of wondering in their thoughts and in full company of each other. Hiyori felt, for a moment, that he was thinking about her just as she was thinking about him.
The thought pleased her heart.
They arrived at her gate. He tried to give her umbrella back, but Hiyori insisted that he would take it home. Soon, it was down and closed – both were under the rain, outside her gate.
Hesitantly, she dropped his hand instantly missing the warmth.
Hiyori looked at him – his humid hair touching the pale skin, his eyes already showing the longing he was about to feel, his mouth parted as if he was about to say something. She covered the point of her chest in which her heart should be with her hands, as the increased heartbeat betrayed her saying the words she was too scared to say or think – love you, love you, love you.
“Good night” she said, like she didn’t want to.
“Good night” he replied, as half-hearted.
She smiled weakly, wondering if the god knew the struggle she had in that moment.
Her heartbeat kept betraying her, the intense beat singing the words deep down of her throat.
She entered the gate.
III. Warmth
She looked back at the silhouette behind her, and stopped in her way.
“Yato” she said. She was unsure of how to make clear her thoughts “would you… stay for a bit?’
The god was taken by surprise, but recovered. He quickly opened the umbrella again and put Hiyori and himself under it, stopping the increasing rain of soaking both. Hiyori closed the gate behind her and they both entered the house. They both took their shoes out and entered together.
“Teleport to my room.” She whispered to the god, who nodded. Hiyori entered the living room and greet her family. They did not seem surprised by her retiring quickly to her room, as she still looked very sleepy from napping in Kofuku’s kotatsu.
A feeling of nervousness took over her already fast heartbeat as she climbed the stairs, and she saw herself running to the door of the room.
Yato was there, his hands in his pockets and his hair in his face. Hiyori’s first instinct was to give him a towel to dry his moist hair and shoulders, as she mob her own hair as well. After realizing the jersey’s upper part was a lost cause, he took out his coat and stretched it over a chair to dry.
Hiyori was taken aback by the god’s silhouette. It never seemed as slim or as gracious – she surely was found of Touno’s beefy body, but Yato’s shoulders and the subtle curves of his arms and flat stomach were just as welcoming as the warmth of her blankets. Noticing her stare, he looked away as a tender blush graced his cheeks and scratched the nape of his neck. Hiyori was embarrassed herself, her heartbeat no longer singing, but screaming ‘love you’ as it was being chased down and slain.
She said no words, worried that her heartbeat would resound in her mouth and those scary words would come out. Instead, she walked to her wardrobe and put on her baggiest sweater thinking in what she would say to the god to excuse her sudden invitation. Turning to him again, that watched her with both awe and curiosity, all her words were lost.
“Are you okay?’ he asked her, carefully sitting on her bed and watching her with those oh so blue eyes, ready to listen to whatever she had to say.
“What are you thinking about?”
“Heh?”
“Right now, before asking me this?”
“That you are acting as if was about to bite you, instead of the opposite.” A playful smirk graced his lips as she looked away embarrassed.
“I already apologized for that.” He laughed softly.
“Still, what are you afraid of?”
Love you, love you.
“I…”
Do you love me? I love you, love you.
“I mean, you look kind of afraid of something, or just weirdly nervous.” He tried “And you look worse now, would you rather not talk about this?”
She pursued her lips and looked down.
“I would like to talk about this” she said, sincerely “But I am not ready for it yet.”
“Okay” he said “I won’t ask more then.”
When did he get so attentive? He hardly looked like the same guy who took over her body for a day.
“I’m tired” she admitted, sitting by his side in bed and leaning her head in his shoulder. She inhaled as discretely as she could in his smell and appeased her unruly heartbeat “I’m sorry for asking you to come inside, you must be as tired as I’m.” he rested his hands in her back, comforting.
“It’s ok. I can always sleep with you.” She rolled her eyes as he laughed tiredly, fantasying for a moment the comfort it must be to lay in his arms the whole night and sleep embraced in his warmth.
Love you, love you.
She blushed furiously, glad for the fact that he wasn’t able to see her. She embraced his torso softly and just stayed there as he massaged her scalp with his fingertips. Soon, she was almost asleep again, so he guided her confused body to lay in her pillow, covering her with the blankets and placing a soft kiss in her forehead.
Love you, love you – his heart sang.