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Sam Winchester loved a night off, that much he can tell you. There's something easy about rolling out of bed late, eating whatever greasy, unhealthy thing his brother has cooked up, and then going out to a bar for the evening. It's easy, simple. It's a far cry from the life he was always so desperate to lead, but it's the fun part of hunting. The part that doesn't end up with you covered in vampire guts or trying to save yet another person from their own stupid decisions and inability to leave well enough alone.
“I swear to you, she was putting the moves on!” Sam rolls his eyes as Dean drinks down his beer as he recounts yesterday's case to Castiel. “I think Sam's just impervious to womanly charm if it isn't a monster.”
Sam almost spits his beer out at that. “Wait. Wait. Wait. Dean?” He questions. It's wildly unfair to say, he thinks. He had a several years long relationship with Jess who was obviously not a monster and any of the short lived relationships he's had on the road have been human too. Well, mostly. He chooses not to think about Ruby too often, the betrayal still hurts even so many years later. Sure, he’d had a few hookups or vague romances that turned out to be less than human, but he isn’t ashamed of it.
“I mean,” Dean just shrugs, beer bottle halfway to his mouth. “You don't have a great track record.”
“Oh come on!” He looks over at Cas. “Dude, help me out here?”
Cas just tilts his head in that weird way of his and sighs. “He is correct, Sam. You do have a strange interest in at least sleeping with the monsters you are supposed to hunt.”
“And here I thought you were my friend.” He sighs, taking a drink from his own beer on the table. He knows that Dean is at least a little bit right, he has had a lot of…sexual experiences with women who turned out to be the very thing they're supposed to hunt. But, Dean isn't exactly innocent in that either.
He wants to bring up the Amazon, but he knows that's still a sensitive topic. Even all these years later, Sam knows that the situation broke his brother's heart and there had been no signs, no indication that she was a monster at the time. So, he bites his tongue and sits quietly while his brother jokes at his expense.
He’s not a stranger to this type of banter, especially from Dean. Being a hunter wasn’t exactly a glamorous lifestyle and they’ve ALL had their share of horror stories in the romance department, Cas had literally been murdered by one of his one night stands and Dean… Sam doesn’t even have the energy to go through all of his long, dark nights. But, there’s something about this type of joking that really makes Sam angry. Because he’s not the only one in this family who’d slept with a “monster.” He’s not the only one who’s made bad sex and romance choices. And, he thinks Dean should be reminded of his own too.
“Face it Sam, you’re absolutely what we all call a monster-fucker.”
“Dean,” Cas challenges him a bit and Dean holds his hands up in mock surrender, his beer dangling from his thumb and index finger. “You should be kinder to Sam. We have all done things we’re not proud of.”
They all go silent for a moment. Because Cas is right. Cas is usually right, and Sam thinks they don’t acknowledge that nearly enough. Right now, he’s happy to have Cas on his side even a little bit.
“Yea Dean,” he leans back in his chair and waits until his brother has the beer bottle to his lips, taking a large sip. “If I’m a monster fucker then what does that make you?” He takes in the way Dean’s eyebrows knit together and Sam pulls out the ace up his sleeve, the only thing that’s sure to make Dean and Cas squirm in some sort of discomfort.
“I’m not the one who slept with an angel.”
The table goes silent, Dean coughs and sputters, beer flying everywhere. Cas’s eyes go incredibly wide and his own beer gets knocked over by the force of which he jumps, jamming his knee against the underside of the flimsy bar table. Sam just leans back further and smirks, lifting his beer in victory. It’s not very often he gets the best of Dean or makes his brother speechless Honestly, he’s surprised he remembered this bit of information to pull out, but it’s been super helpful. Afterall, Anna has been gone for a long while so it shouldn’t impact anything they’re currently working on, but it’ll be enough of an embarrassing memory that Dean and Cas should stop harassing him.
What Sam doesn’t expect is the silence to be broken by his brother’s hoarse voice as he turns to Cas. “You told him? Dude?!” His voice cracks on the last word and he looks betrayed, eyes clouded in sadness.
“No,” Cas says slowly as he turns from Dean to Sam. “I didn’t tell him anything, Dean. I was unaware that Sam was in possession of such knowledge. I thought I was extremely discreet after you explained that him knowing of our intimacy could be a problem for you and your family. I’m unsure how he discovered this.”
And–woah wait a second. That is not what he was expecting to hear. ‘Dude, uncool’ or ‘That was a million years ago!’ were what he was expecting. He figured a little joke about Anna wouldn’t hurt anything, but… well… Sam thinks he just found out something he wasn’t supposed to be privy to. He’s also not sure he ever wanted to be privy to it.
“You?” He’s unable to think of anything else to say. He just sits there, with both Cas and Dean’s eyes on him, all 3 unwilling to speak first.
“How’d you find out?” Dean’s finally the one to break the tense silence.
Sam just barks a laugh that he knows is strained. “I uh–well–right now? I was talking about Anna?” Dean pales as he realizes it and Sam wants to laugh at the expense of his older brother, but he really can’t.
“I mean,” Sam tries to make it better, he wants to make it better for the two men across from him. “We’ve all done things we regret, things we’d rather no one know about. You hooked up, so what? You’ve obviously moved past it!” He’s struggling to keep it together. He has so many questions, but he knows that Dean is his priority right now. Because Sam knows when his brother is about to jump off the deep end, and this looks like one of those times.
“Sam,” Cas says, careful and deliberate. He shoots Dean a look and the other man just nods with eyes still wide, still with a bit of terror behind them. “This was not a ‘one time thing.’” He puts the air quotes around it and everything. Sam would normally laugh at that, because it’s such a Cas thing to do. But he can’t right now. Because he’s still reeling from finding out, but now he’s reeling once again from the idea of it not being a once and done kind of thing.
“It wasn’t?”
Dean shakes his head. “No, Sammy.”
“Okay, okay, so.” Sam takes a long slow sip from his beer bottle while he thinks about all the information he has. “You guys have a like friends with benefits thing going on? Hookup when you’re lonely type of stuff? I mean, I wouldn’t do it but if it works it works.” He tries for levity, but one look at the other mens’ faces and he thinks maybe that wasn’t the best joke.
Dean sighs deeply, running a hand down his face and mouthing something the Sam assume is “fuck.” Cas is just still sitting there, but now his head is down and eyes trained to the tabletop. He appears to be following the trail of sticky beer that’s running from the table top down to the floor with an easy drip.
“Sammy,” Dean just shakes his head before reaching down to guide Cas’s hand up to the table top. They make a thunk as their fingers wind together and Sam suddenly feels like the world’s biggest idiot. “It’s less friends with benefits and more… actual relationship kind of things.”
Sam blinks once, twice and he hears Dean saying his name. “Sorry, sorry. I just– it's a lot.”
“Yea,” Dean rubs at the back of his neck with his free hand, keeping his left linked with Cas on the tabletop. Sam can't help but let his eyes wander there as he recontextualizes so many experiences he's had with them, how he now has to reorient himself to who his brother really is. It's not a bad thing, not by any means. There's been times over the years where he's wondered about them, where he's thought their relationship might be something more.
“So,” he taps on the table top. “Is it uh– guys or just…” he trails off. It's an awkward question, one he's not sure he even wants an answer to. Dean is still Dean, regardless. Sam's just surprised that if Dean is into guys that he never picked up on it.
His brother just shrugs. “Not really sure. Cas isn't even really a dude, just dude shaped.” He sighs.
“I offered to obtain a new vessel but your brother declined.”
Sam watches a blush climb up Dean's neck. He's never seen him like this, never seen him embarrassed this way. It's…sweet. He told Dean a long time ago that he should look at settling down with someone who understood the life. He can't help but think there's no better match than Cas.
“I mean, “ Dean just shrugs again, tapping on his now empty beer bottle. “Another vessel wouldn't be you, Cas.”
It's with stunning clarity that Sam realizes that this is the real deal, the thing that makes Dean happy, the thing that might be the very last for him. He can't help it, he grins as he brings the beer bottle to his lips again. The thing is empty by now but he needs the crutch.
“So I think there's a rugaru out in Topeka. It isn't that far. Figured we could head out tomorrow if that's okay?”
He watches as Dean takes a breath and then nods, obviously thrilled by the change in conversation.
It's later when they're loading the car, Dean nestling the last of a bottle of holy oil into the corner of the trunk that Sam tries to broach the subject again.
“Cas not coming?”
Dean only shakes his head, eyes trained on the knife in his hand. “Yea uh–not this time. Figured it's an easy case, fine for the two of us to do it ourselves.”
“sounds great,” Sam smiles. “Just so you know,” Dean glances at him. “I'm happy for you.”
Dean's looking down again, eyes never leaving the contents of the trunk when he finally speaks again. “Thanks, Sammy. I'm real happy like this.”
Sam can't help it, he smiles as he rounds the corner to get in the passenger side of the impala. They don't speak about it again, but Sam knows now. He knows why Dean rushes home after a case, why Dean suddenly smiles more, how Dean's gotten softer over time.
Sam just rolls his eyes to himself as he pulls up the first article related to their case. This is his family and he wouldn't trade it for anything.