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“Who are you?” Anna raised her voice as she pointed her gun at me.
Trying to avoid flinching, I gently activated my TK to pull it away, trying to look as harmless as possible. Relief slowly formed on her face as soon as I showed her my lighter, causing her to sigh.
It’s funny. We first showed a connection from a broken window, its shards barely missing my clothes as I covered my face. A shattered window due to a bullet, its source I can’t even remember anymore.
And now we’re here, with me sneaking into her window, careful not to shatter any glass just in case.
“You. What are you doing here?” She came to me and questioned my presence. My shoulders were slumped as I felt the scrapes from my escape. My voice was caught in my throat, trying hard not to wince in pain as I tried to control my trembling.
“Anna, how do you leave this life behind?” I met her in the eye as I tried hard to remain conscious, my battered body slowly collapsing from the injuries I’ve sustained back at the elevator.
I chased after my breath as soon as my body made its choice to take me out of whatever void my soul had been floating in. However, a gentle hand stopped me from getting up, the stern warning in her eyes enchanting me to yield immediately.
“You said you want to leave this life behind?” Her voice was as regal as ever, eyes ever so sharp, as if looking for any deception.
But she will not find any. I really do want to quit.
Upon my nod, she gently put some ice over my arms, the cold biting causing me to flinch. However, I stayed quiet and gritted my teeth, knowing that it was better for me to endure for the sake of the bruises I sustained. I’m sure she gave me something to numb the pain while I was unconscious but it wasn’t enough to block all of it.
“The Phoenix is dead.” I mumbled as fatigue caught up to me once again, leading me into the voice once again.
It was like any ordinary day. Anna was practicing for her next recital in the other room while I listened in on the agency radio. A hint of warmth filled my cheeks as the image of her sitting on the chair I’m currently occupying filled my mind.
She’d been keeping an eye on my progress, each mission, each success–she’d been silently watching in the background, a radio being the only bridge between us. She’d been waiting for the future where I would come find her.
“I’m free… I would tell you to come find me someday, but I get the impression you couldn’t leave this life behind, so instead I will just say… Thank you…”
I tried to hide my tears yet I came running to her for comfort. I can’t… she was right. I couldn’t leave that life behind, not when…
The music stopped when we made eye contact, yet I made sure to remember every part of her. I want to take it all in, preserve it in my memory. Her eyes furrowed in concern but there was a hint of accusation and pain in them.
Ever since I heard that gunshot, I had been reminded that my actions as a spy didn’t affect just me, Zoraxis, and the agency. There are people who do not fit into the categories, turncoats and defectors exist on both sides.
And that there are people who want to leave this life behind, unwilling to fall into the categories of either side.
I thought I was one of them, only for reality to slap me hard in the face that I am not, forever bound to one side.
There was an unspoken conversation between us, only spoken with our hands as she caressed my cheeks and I carded her hair. I don’t want to ever let her go, but what can we actually do?
If I hold on, we could lose each other without a fight.