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They arrived at the place, full of lights, colors, flavors, and music, and Severus knew that this had all been a bad idea. If he hadn't had Lupin's hand holding him tightly, he would have turned and fled the place faster than if he'd used a spell.
But Lupin was holding him. He held him tightly as he looked around, eyes bright and full of wonder. His gaze finally settled on Severus, and his open, beautiful smile made him forget why he wanted to leave in the first place.
-All right, gentlemen, ladies, and big noses, it's time to get the fun started ! –
Oh.
Yep. He remembered now.
The pained sound Lily drew from her boyfriend, James, didn't make his annoyance go away. The squeeze on his hand and Remus' sincere look of apology helped just a little. But only minimally.
—We'll start having fun when you stop being a piece of shit, Potter. Seriously... read the atmosphere —
But there wasn't much to read in the atmosphere besides audible excitement escaping in the form of giggles and vibrations from Charity's body.
—This is so amazing, I've never seen Muggle stuff so close up. It all looks so much fun! —
Severus glanced at one of the sizzling controls of the rides.
—No doubt...— he murmured, moving closer to Remus as a boy with his hands covered in candy walked past him.
—Alright, alright. I´m sorry, old habits die hard. Anyway, where are we going first? —
The girls started talking over each other about which one looked more interesting while Severus wondered how they had convinced him to agree to this.
—Come on, I'll carry you on my back if you get tired— he heard in the distance, that voice that apparently wouldn't stop reminding him of that day. Damn it, Potter.
James Potter and he had entered into a truce. Not because Severus believed in his written apology for all the damage he'd caused him since his first year, but because this idiot made Lily laugh as hard as she had before her father died. He had been by her side when she became distant and cold, distant in her grief. He had sat beside her, silently, and comforted her when she cried herself to sleep.
He had also apologized to her. Openly, accepting all his mistakes. He was an idiot, and to Severus, he would always be the most annoying person in the universe. But he loved her. He loved her as much, if not more than he did. But he would never admit this out loud, because James Potter was a complete idiot.
And that idiot had stood in front of his room to ask him to attend the meeting.
—Lily has missed you lately. She's missed everyone, really. And I wanted to know if you wanted to join us because I know that you miss her too and I really want her to be happy and-
Severus had slammed the door in his face before he completed his sentence.
Not that she and Severus had stopped talking. They had fought during the fifth year. By then, they'd both been having a bad time. They had both said and done things they would later regret.
If Remus hadn't intervened, forcing the two of them to have a long talk locked in a classroom that prevented them from attending their own graduation ceremony, they probably would have gone years without speaking to each other. But thank god Remus was a stubborn bastard.
—We should go— Remus said, eating a chocolate tart in his underwear and a large woolen jumper from the kitchen, where he had watched the whole exchange with an amused expression.
—Go on your own, then— Severus mumbled, furious as he turned away from the door, where James was still speaking louder so that it could be heard through the door.
Remus left his plate in the sink and walked over to Severus, who was aggressively starting to make himself a sandwich. Remus put his chin on his shoulder, uncovered because the collar of the big T-shirt didn't want to stay still. Stupid Remus, and his stupid big clothes.
—What's the matter? — he asked with his lips against his bare skin. Severus ignored the shiver that ran through his body and answered with a stern look that communicated all the problems he had with the idea of Potter.
—I thought you'd been talking to each other? —
—We are! Sometimes... not every day... —
Remus returned the look, which communicated how little he believed his excuses. Severus looked away and went back to concentrating on chopping lettuce and bacon.
—I'm trying... it’s just, I don't want to spend more time than necessary with him, and I don't want to ask her to see me alone, it would be strange... —
—Why? I see James and Sirius alone with me all the time— Severus frowned, chopping more aggressively at the ingredients for his sandwich. He couldn't lie to this man. He could always find a way to make him spit out the whole truth.
When Remus's expectant gaze finally became too much to bear, Severus set the knife and the pulverized vegetables aside as he sighed in defeat. Stupid Remus and his stupid insight.
—I don't want to see her after all this time and find out I'm not her best friend anymore. I left her alone, Remus... Even if we're ‘fine’ now, nothing will ever be the same again...—
Remus hugged him from behind, making an up-and-down motion on the left side of his torso as if trying to soothe a phantom pain. Remus knew how difficult it was for Severus to talk about his emotions, so he left a kiss on his cheek to convey how proud he was of him.
—You're an idiot, Severus— he said loudly because he really was. Severus protested as Remus lifted him off the floor and set him on the kitchen counter. Remus somehow managed to fix Severus's sandwich and serve it to him with some orange juice.
Then he opened the door again, where James Potter was still waiting with folded arms and a tired expression.
—Well see you on Tuesday at the bus station near the square— he said.
James's face immediately lit up, and he opened his mouth to either thank or mock the heart-shaped pants Remus was wearing.
—And if you knock on the door at 7:00 in the morning like that again, I'm going to curse you— he interrupted him before he had a chance to do either, —I'm serious, Prongs— he said.
And then she slammed the door in his face. On her way back to the room, she gave another kiss to Severus, who still couldn't properly process what had happened.
Only now, in the middle of an endless line to ride the roller coaster, did he understand the level of control he had allowed Remus Lupin over his person. Stupid Remus, stupid Potter, stupid emotions.
—Are you telling me that Muggles ride these mechanical beasts of death for fun? —
Aurora's voice caught the attention of the group. —Well, we have a sport that is played thousands of feet above the ground. And we think it's a lot of fun— Lily replied, always ready to defend the honor of Muggle customs.
—And these parks usually give you a lot of money if you die in one of their games. You know, for the inconvenience and so on...— completed Severus, always ready to plant more seeds of chaos in the atmosphere.
Lily let out a giggle, and Severus smiled. He had missed that sound. Remus tapped him on the shoulder, giving him a look that told him to behave. He only grinned wider, promising more trouble in the future.
—Oh, dear— Charity murmured, clutching her bright ink pen with pens and the park logo she'd bought at the gift shop as soon as they entered the park, —I hadn't thought about how similar this was to fly. I hate flying. That wouldn't be a problem, would it? —
Charity was a treasure of the magical world , she was extremely curious and had an obsession with Muggle objects that he sometimes took her to study on his days off. But probably what Severus liked most about her was how much she looked like a hamster when she was frightened.
—Don't worry, no one rides the roller coaster to feel like they're flying— Severus commented in a reassuring voice as the line moved forward, —It's the fall that's most interesting—
Charity squealed as Remus squeezed Severus' waist and Aurora slapped him in the back of the head with her open palm.
Severus felt a little bad. But Charity forgot her fear pretty quickly, sitting in the first line of the game, so her lapse of consciousness didn't last long. Anyway, karma came to him very quickly after the ride.
Charity was jumping up and down as she tried to convince them to get on again, but more than half of the group was trying to keep their internal organs inside their bodies, so Lily had to be the one to tell her that they'd better find something else to do.
—Not a Word— Severus warned with shaky legs and tousled hair, not seeing the redhead who was shaking with laughter while helping her boyfriend put on his glasses and walk in a straight line.
—I remember why I never played Quidich— Remus muttered, one hand cradling his head and his face a greenish hue, —I don't remember Quidich feeling like this— Potter added, leaning a little to the side of a tent, with Lily very kindly rubbing his back and still laughing uproariously.
—Why don't we try a less extreme game now? One that doesn't require so many turns, preferably? —
And so Lily, being the only one who had been to an amusement park before, became the guide and decided on the next ride.
And you see one of the things one must know about Lily before giving her any position of power is that, behind all that innocent and friendly lady-like appearance, there lurked a mischievous, mad, unhinged witch. So, naturally, the next game was bumper cars.
The only good thing about this experience was that he got to watch James Potter go round and round the track without being able to hit any trolleys, but getting the combined attack of him, Aurora, and a couple of kids who simply decided to join in the fun of attacking the strange adult who was shouting ‘No fair! You're cheating!’ as he turned the wrong way from the person he was trying to hit. Again.
Lily was laughing the whole ride but ended up being revoked of her guiding privileges, and they all decided to try their luck by getting on all the rides at the fair.
The experience was fun. He didn't really expect anything from it, he thought it would be harder to reconnect with her friend. The guilt and complex feelings were still there, deep and embedded in his memory. But Lily's presence (mature, confident, grown-up Lily) made it seem like the years hadn't passed at all.
They sat at one of the little tables in the center of the fair. They had passed the carousel, the booths with games of strength and aim to win gifts, and even the spinning cups. James was trying to hit one of the moving ducks to win a big lion teddy bear for Lily . He wasn't doing very well, but the fact that he was trying when he knew full well that his pompous fingers had never even grazed a water gun gave him all the extra points he needed.
Lily kissed him on the cheek when he lost again, and then kissed him on the lips as they circled around in celebration when he finally brought the duck down.
Severus would never let anyone know that he had slightly helped correct the direction of the water jet to the correct target. When he turned his gaze to Remus and found him smiling with a combination of love, pride, and pure smugness, he knew he had been found out.
When Remus dragged him into an alley behind the food stall and slammed him against the wall to kiss him hard, he discovered that he didn't really care that much. Their kisses were uncoordinated and demanding. There was no room to breathe or hesitate, they always promised more.
It was exciting, kissing like this. The evening air, the background sounds of people talking, the lights of the fair, and the music of the food stalls. They knew that anyone could find them at any moment, and that made the taste of each other's lips feel that much more dangerous, the heat in the pit of their stomachs that much more intense and uncontrollable.
Severus had to pull away for a moment, jerking his head back to get his lips out of Remus' reach, who was still trying to chase them by leaning forward.
—We have to go back, the rest...—
Severus swallowed his words, Remus' lips had found their way to his Adam's apple. Severus let out a deep, shuddering sigh, Remus had a very effective way of making his mind go blank that involved sucking in his skin, biting it, and then kissing it lightly to do the same again on every other inch of exposed skin.
—Later —
He murmured before pressing another kiss on Severus’ now exposed shoulder.
—Just a little while longer...—
He finished with a bite that elicited a soft moan from Severus. His feet were no longer touching the ground, Remus was holding him by the legs, one of his hands massaging his thigh and pretending to go higher when...
—Hey, Mooney, did you know that Muggles eat cotton wool? They're so extra- AH! BY GODRIC!
Potter's voice had never sounded so unpleasant as it did at this moment. Seriously, how was he expected to make peace with him if things like this happened when he was trying to be nice to him?
Remus stopped kissing him, and if he hadn't been holding him so tightly, Severus would have jumped six feet in the air in shock.
—James!— Remus exclaimed, hugging Severus tighter as he hid his hot, red face on his shoulder, out of Potter's sight. Even with his heart beating a mile a minute (Severus could feel it under his clothes, so close they were) he didn't let him go at any point, instead pulled him closer to himself to conceal the partial nudity of his torso and stood there while the other rearranged his clothes.
—Always such good timing, Prongs— he muttered in frustration. Severus could feel his ears taking on a pinkish hue. Had he been alone, Remus would have kissed them.
—I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I don't mean it in a bad way! Good for you, Moony, I'm so happy for you both! Y-you guys go on, I'll go get a bottle of bleach to wash my eyes out with—
Remus began to laugh, his body vibrating against Severus with each laugh. Severus hugged him tighter, not because he enjoyed the firm feeling his body offered, but because he wanted to hang him and this was the perfect opportunity to do so . Yes, that was the reason he still wouldn't let go and his legs were still wrapped around his waist.
—Well, at least he knows how uncomfortable it is— Remus muttered, pressing his forehead to Severus’ and standing there with his eyes closed.
—Wait, how does he know what bleach is? I'm pretty sure he's never touched a cleaning product in his life —
This made Remus laugh harder. Severus hugged him for a while longer, and then they had to leave with the others.
Severus started writing more frequently to Lily and had the chance to be the first to find out about her pregnancy a few months later. Remus was reading over his shoulder as usual, so technically he was the third to know.
Keeping the secret until Lily had her ultrasound and watching James Potter cry his eyes out over the news was a wonderful experience. If he cried a little when he was told that they had both ( both ) decided to make him the godfather of their second baby, no one but him and Remus were to know. Stupid Remus and his stupid knowing grin.