Work Text:
It was currently 1:20 am, the clock in the corner of their room was ticking slowly but going just a bit faster than Luo Binghe could finish the rest of the papers he needed to sign. With a deep sigh, he looked back at the pile of files that were calling his name and just as he picked up another sheet to fill, the door to his office creaked open, breaking him from the zone he was trying to submerge himself in.
Startled, he glanced over quickly but calmed down once he saw it was just his husband. "Phew.. you scared me for a second there." Luo Binghe coughed out, relieved to see a familiar face through everything. The night was what usually shrouded everything in darkness, it could serve as a catalyst to hide from his fears but also heighten them even more. "Anyways, you don't have to worry about me, I'll be in bed soon." He said reassuringly, knowing already what Shen Qingqiu was in here for before the latter even mentioned anything.
Shen Qingqiu nodded, knowing how easily startled Luo Binghe could get at night. The nightmares were what usually kept him from having a good night's rest, this was something he'd let him know when they first got together but lately it's been becoming a more reoccurring problem. He'd been blaming it on the amount of work that the company was producing but Shen Qingqiu knew better than to believe anything that rolled off that silver tongue of his.
Crossing his arms, Shen Qingqiu sighed, not budging from where he leaned against the doorway until Luo Binghe would go to bed. This kind of treatment reminded him of his childhood, the way that his "friends" or abusive parents would stare at him with disappointment, waiting for him to do something that would please them. The memory forced Luo Binghe to harden his resolve, trying to fight back at whoever threatened him the only way he knew how. To show that he was the one in control.
Yet his love for his husband ran so deep that even when his fight or flight response was triggered, he could still tell the difference between what was reality or a figment of his imagination. He could never bring himself to hurt him no matter what. Instead, Luo Binghe just opted to put his face into his hands, elbows propped up on the table as he pleaded with Shen Qingqiu to just leave for now. "Please, just let me be, I'll be there in 10."
Even though Shen Qingqiu was skeptical about this promise, he didn't want to hold him back from his work either so he nodded, and left, the train of the floor-length, fur-trimmed sleeping robe following suit before he closed the door behind himself.
Once his husband had left, Luo Binghe returned to finishing as much work as he could before he had to actually head to bed this time. The time ticked by once more and before he knew it, Shen Qingqiu was back in his doorway, this time much less pleased than before.
Luo Binghe knew he couldn't fight it anymore, he couldn't keep running away from his problems anymore. Knowing that the rest of the papers weren't even due within a few months, he grabbed the completed pile and made sure they were kept in a straight-edged, neat tower before following Shen Qingqiu to their bedroom.
Although it didn't seem so at first glance, Shen Qingqiu was actually the older, and much wiser one of the relationship. He knew that they both couldn't just let this go and pretend like it won't escalate. The best way was to face the situation at hand.
When they got to the bed and Luo Binghe began to change into his night clothes, Shen Qingqiu facing away, was thinking of how to talk to his husband about such a deep, sensitive topic. He found that just like how they should be facing the problem is how he should begin the talk about it. "Hey.. Binghe, I think tonight is the night that we finally face the demon plaguing your dreams." Shen Qingqiu said vaguely, Luo Binghe was also turned away from him but he could hear him clearly. He knew Shen Qingqiu was right.
With a deep sigh and a nod, Luo Binghe turned around and the both sat in the middle of their large bed, the layers of the canopy above and around them providing a comfortable air of secrecy and sentimentality. Looking down at his hands as he sat cross-legged, Luo Binghe avoided Shen Qingqiu's eyes as he finally spilled out what was on his mind, what was preventing him from being able to sleep. "You're right.. it's time I tell you about everything." He admitted, finally ready to tell Shen Qingqiu the whole truth.
"When I was a child, I did not have the best childhood, abused and hurt at every turn and it was only through working like a dog 24/7 and pure luck that I managed to escape it. But now it seems like my past is catching up to me again, every night for the last few months I've been having nightmares of my past." He didn't want to elaborate any further but luckily, Shen Qingqiu found the details to be sufficient.
Pondering about it for a moment, his hand propped beneath his chin as he thought about what could trigger the nightmares, what he should avoid and if possible, find a way to rid them completely. "Is anything different from before? Was there a drastic change that might have reminded you of it during the day? Usually things that plague our thoughts during the day that aren't addressed, comes back to haunt us in the evening."
Luo Binghe's eyes lit up as soon as Shen Qingqiu mentioned that it may be caused by something that reminded him of his past problems. He nodded, his mind coming back to a new employee they'd hired. "Yes, I just remembered.. I think it started since we've gotten a new financial advisor, his name is Liu Qingge. It's just... he acts so similar to the way my bullies used to, the way he's so sassy and acts like such a smartass just completely reminds me of Ming Fan, the leader of the class who was instructed by the teacher to pick on me. Even though I was the smartest kid in the whole class, possibly in the entire grade, that teacher, Shen Jiu, hated my guts for some reason. But at least I made him pay in the end."
The way Luo Binghe ended his rant sent a shiver up Shen Qingqiu's spine. What could he mean by that? "What? How?" He had a bad feeling in his guts, maybe the problem laid in how Luo Binghe 'got rid' of his past troubles instead of facing the issue at hand.
"Well, you know.. using the power I've accumulated now to just basically ruin his life I guess. Same for Ming Fan too." He rubbed the back of his neck, the action actually seeming a bit more douchey than he'd previously expected.
With this, Shen Qingqiu massaged the bridge of his nose out of annoyance. It was way too late now to do anything currently, but in the morning, they'd definitely be having a long talk about how acceptable certain ways of taking revenge were. "Right.. well, let's go to bed tonight, in the morning you can think over the ways you can make amends with your tormentors, not for them, but for yourself." This whole situation was born of Luo Binghe digging his own grave, but the relieving thing was now they'd found a way to get him out