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There they both sat, on top of the tardis their fingers intertwined with eachother. After being hit with an actual beam straight through her and having to be carried by them back inside the tardis,she still somehow got back up and after making sure the fam was safe with little to no difficulties, they could see how hard the doctor was holding back on regenerating and how it looked so painful for her to do so.
A tear slid down their face as they watched her stare at the stars infront of her while next to them, they won't get to see this face ever again and they had loved it oh so much.Their hand gripping hers slightly harder at the thought, maybe if they hold hard enough she wont go, maybe she wont leave them and everything will be okay. The doctor was trying to hold herself together both emotionally and from regenerating, her eyes already getting watery.
They couldn't handle this, they wished so deeply and hopefully that this was all a sick nightmare and the doctor would just wake them up, wake them up and it would just turn out that this was just a fever dream because this didn't feel real. It felt like their whole world was crumbling infront of them. They hated this so much.
"I'm.. going to miss you, doctor"
They finally muttered with an unsteady tone, their tears weren't helping them with speaking any clearer, they wished their tears could help her, heal her so she wouldn't have to regenerate, to change.. to die. She won't literally die but it feels like it, she won't be the same like her now and they know that all too well, they know the doctor changes their face it's old news by now but they can never get used to it.
The doctor looked at her lover with a soft and understanding smile, her hand moving to hold their crying face, they sobbed as they rested their head on her hand, her eyes lovingly looking at them. Taking in every perfect flaw on their face, remembering every place she's kissed them,their eyes that sparkled at her compliments, their beautiful smile whenever they went out on adventure with her before all this had to happen. Her eyes saddened aswell.
"Not as much as I'm going to miss you, sunshine."
She achingly replied even more sadder than them, she blinked once and could feel the double tears falling down onto her cheeks, her thumb softly caressing their face, she smiled tiredly.
She then pulled them into one last meaningful kiss, they closed their eyes, accepting her kiss instantly, afraid it'll never last long enough and it didn't, they kissed back giving up on any last bits of hope that there was to try and save her, they knew there was no possible way of stopping her from changing that would just lead her to actually die and they'd much rather let the doctor live on with a new face and with someone else.
They pulled away not by choice but they knew it couldn't last long, the doctor knew already and understood them, the longer they stayed like this the harder it's going to be to let go.
"I love you."
It felt right to say, the last words together deserved to be that. They had always meant it and the doctor never thought anything else of it, she regretted not admitting it enough to them that she loved them just as much back too, they knew she had difficulties confessing her love meaningfully but she had her own ways of showing that so they didn't expect her to say it back.
"I'll always love you,sunny."
She confessed deeply from both of her hearts, it made their eyes widen slightly which led to their eyebrows furrowing as more tears drowned their eyes, their head quickly fell onto her chest, she had no choice but to wrap her arms around them for one last time, whispering softly in their ear.
"And you'll always be in my hearts as long as I live."
The sound of their sobs drowned out the last few words but they got it, atleast assumed they got it since they cried harder after she said it.
She has decided that she was going to bring sunny home, put them back to a place where they feel safe, they had relented at first and asked,no they downright pleaded and begged if they couldn't just stay with her since they'd still love her no matter her new face but she rejected that and there was no luck in arguing with her, they knew all too well that she was being dead serious about their safety and maybe.. just maybe they'll both meet again someday.
They said their last goodbyes, they waved at her while the tardis dematerialized, dropping their head and having no choice in walking home, maybe phone their friend to ask him to help them out.