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Gaku is sure he's never been good at using knives.
Sharp objects are definitely not his favorites, and his clumsy ass often get him some cuts here and there when he has to use them. Recently, it has come to the point that Uzuki prohibits him from the kitchen, saying he doesn't need to cook even though people in their share house always take turn to make dinner.
Despite all that being said, there he is — holding a knife and a pumpkin in his hands in the Halloween evening, sitting in the midst of people he barely knows.
For the first time in forever, Uzuki lets him use the knife, but not in any ways he's ever imagined before. Of course, not the request for him to help carving the pumpkins for Halloween night to create the vibes these people have been talking about.
They run out of people and they need a helping hand, that's what Uzuki said, so Gaku is dragged along to meet the other’s classmates for a small Halloween party held at one of his friends’ house. Most of the decorations are already put up by the time he arrived, leaving only pumpkins scattered on the floor waiting for someone to do something.
Well, that someone might be him, and he guesses this is the only time he'll be doing this thing. The first and also the last time.
"Have you ever done this before?" One of Uzuki's classmates, Nagumo, pops his head next to him just when he starts cutting the pumpkin. The fancy glasses he wears looks so silly Gaku almost doesn't recognize him at first.
"No."
"Not a party animal?"
He shrugs, "never been."
Gaku isn’t sure why, but Nagumo looks clearly amused when his eyes move from his face, to the pumpkin he’s holding, to the knife in his hand. It makes him uneasy being stared at and not knowing what on the other’s mind is. And this person is always like this, he always wears a smile on his face, but it’s almost impossible to read his true intentions.
It’s the type he finds hard to handle.
Uzuki often tells him not to take it serious because Nagumo is just like this, like it’s his nature, but Gaku still finds it annoying to have him around, and to have to listen to nonsense shit he likes to talk about.
Those eyes still look right into his although he glares back, and after satisfying himself by staring at him for long enough, Nagumo pats his shoulder.
"Watch closely, then." The other takes a seat on the floor next to him and picks up one of the pumpkins, placing it on his lap. The knife movement after that is too fast Gaku barely sees anything.
Shortly, after a whole minute of staring blankly at it and having no clues what’s going on, the Jack-o’-lanterns appears before his eyes.
"What the fuck?"
His month moves fast than his mind when the other drops the finished product on the floor in front of him, a classic shape he sees everywhere looking back as he gazes at it.
Nagumo laughs despite his glare.
"Eh, is it too fast? I think I did it very slowly though."
Gaku snorts, "right, excuse me for being a slow learner."
"Well, since I'm a kind gentleman, I'll give you the second chance." The other singsongs and picks up another pumpkin. He moves closer this time to let Gaku takes a proper look at it.
Their knees overlaps when he leans forward to watch the way Nagumo skillfully uses a small knife to cut open the pumpkin, observing how those large bony hands turning it around and grabbing the large spoon to scoop out the seeds inside the fruit. His hands are moving slower this time, but then, he stops.
The Jack-o’-lantern doesn’t even look like the usual ones he sees on TV, or the one that is already finished, when the other puts the pumpkin on his thigh.
"Why don't you try doing the rest?"
Staring at the pumpkin without its stem and half of the seeds removed, Gaku looks up to meet Nagumo’s eyes, "me?"
"I've already done the hard part. Now, it's your turn," the other gestures to the pumpkin. "Get all the seeds out and give it a face.”
He grabs his hand, takes the knife he’s holding out, and replaces it with the spoon. A large bow is dragged to sit on the floor in front of them when he begins to scoop out everything that has left in the pumpkin.
Nagumo seems way too satisfied that Gaku wants to describe the look on his face as him acting like a proud instructor, but that still isn’t it. The thing on his lips looks more like a smirk, and he isn’t even sure why this guy is making this face while looking at him trying to do his job.
He’s always like this.
Uzuki’s voice echoes in his ears.
Just ignore him.
The voice in his head also says.
Scooping the seeds out of the pumpkin, Gaku takes a deep breath, trying his best to not look back at Nagumo who is now searching for something on the floor.
The other hands him a permanent marker when he finishes cleaning the inside of the pumpkin.
“It’s easier to draw this guy a face before you stab him to death.”
“What?”
Nagumo laughs when he stares at him wide eyes. He takes the spoon out of his grip and put the marker in instead, gesturing with his chin to tell him to continue with the process.
Clenching onto the thing in his hand, Gaku hesitantly stares at the half-done Jack-o’-lantern. He’s seen it so many times before, it isn’t going to be that hard to just draw it by just the memory.
Just as Gaku uncaps the marker and is about to draw the first stroke, Nagumo chuckles, and grabs his hand.
"You're too stiff," he shakes his hand softly, trying to loosen him up, "even if you mess it up, we can still make new ones."
The tone of his voice sounds so neutral as if he’s speaking something random, but it makes Gaku still for a moment. It’s weird to hear Nagumo says that. This is the man who likes to get on his nerves for fun after all, but his words are surprisingly kind this time. The soft touch on the back of his hand also feels so unusual as it's now guiding him through the drawing steps quite awkwardly because of their positions.
Nagumo shifts closer to hold his hand more firmly, half of his body is basically behind him as the other looks over his shoulder to get the clear look of the pumpkin on his thighs. The soft breath blowing softly against his skins sends a shiver down his spine, and he's trapped there unable to move, too afraid that it would ruin the thing the other’s trying to draw.
After a mere minute, the face of the Jack-o'-lantern starts to come into shape. And with the one final stroke, Nagumo lets go of his hand.
"It's like this."
He moves away, replacing the marker in his hand with a small knife, and beams him a bright smile.
"Now, carve it."
.
—
It takes a couple of hours for him to finish carving the pumpkins to the numbers these party people want. Everyone comes to help here and there at times, but it’s mostly him and Nagumo who have done the work. Luckily, the other stops teasing him after seeing how much effort he has to put into making just one silly Jack-o’-lantern, and decides to join him silently after that.
The sky is already dark when Gaku puts the Halloween pumpkins around the living room along with other decorations. Fairy lights are used to provide lights to them instead of candles, and when he tries switching the lights on to see if they work well, it turns out prettier than he thinks.
His work is finally done here. The party’s also starting in a few hours, and it’s time to go home.
That’s what he thinks. And that’s what he wants to do.
But two pairs of arms are grabbing him from behind right after he turns off the fairy lights he puts on the last pumpkin, pulling him back harshly with inhuman strength that he almost loses his balance and falls to the floor.
When Gaku stables himself enough to be able to scan the room and process what has been going on, cheerful voices yell in his ears.
"Let's dress you up!"
Akao Rion, also Uzuki’s classmate, and Nagumo hold onto each of his arms as the former shouts lively. Their strengths when they team up are unmatched, making it impossible to break free although he tries, so Gaku lets them drag him to the corner of the room where a dozen of bags scattered on the floor. Uzuki gives him an awkward smile from afar when he looks back to ask for help with his eyes, as if to say there’s no escape, just go with it.
Akao seems excited as she crouches down to search through the bags for something, in which Gaku supposes it might be a costume they want him to wear, while Nagumo studies him from head to toe with mischievous glints reflected in his eyes.
"How about the Olaf costume? It'd suit you."
A silly Olaf costume is pulled out of one of the bags and held in front of him, large eyes of the famous snowman looking at him with its mouth open wide because that’s where his face were supposed to be if he wore it. Yes, that’s one ugly costume.
"Fuck off."
Nagumo laughs openly when he snaps. And the next moment he knows, the other is moving to stand right behind him at the speed of light. Fluffy cat ears are put on his head before he can even protest.
“How about a cat?”
Gaku grabs the headband from his head and shoves it into Nagumo’s hands. He accidentally puts in more strength than he intended to, making the other furrow those brows, but whatever. He doesn’t even budge anyway, and an amused smile is still plastered on his face as he puts away the headband.
Seeing him getting frustrated, Nagumo’s expression softens this time.
"Let's go with the prince costume, then." He pulls the costume out of nowhere and holds it in front of him, inspecting how the clothes will look on him.
After a while, Nagumo nods. "Yeah, it will suit you."
Before Gaku can say anything to stop these people trying to get him to dress up, the prince costume that looks exactly like what he has seen in those fairy tales movies when he was young is thrown at him, and he grabs it by pure reflex. Nagumo then turns him around by the shoulder and pushes him to Akao's directions, making him stumble a bit on his feet.
When Gaku looks up, Akao is grinning. A strong hand grabs onto his wrist before he can say anything, and she drags him along the hallway to the other room.
Nagumo's voice follows them from behind, his words clearly mixed with laughter.
"Please make him spooky, Akao!"
And Akao really does as she was told.
When Gaku looks at himself in a mirror after having to sit still for an hour or so, a reflection of someone that looks like him but in a has-been-dead-for-a-week version is looking back. He looks so pale to the level of a person who is about to faint anytime, but maybe this is how ghosts supposed to look like. Not that he has ever seen one though.
Akao does his hair too. She ruffled it so hard he thought his scalp was going to come off to get this messy hair look she was going for. Gaku thinks he now looks like someone who is extremely sick that has just woken up after a whole week of sleep, but in a prince costume.
He looks weird, but isn't really in a bad way. For the thing he might be doing for only once in his life, he would consider it as a pretty great result.
After having him standing and turning him around multiple times to get the full look for the last time, Akao nods and pushes him out of the room.
"Now, go back. I have to get dress too."
And the door closes immediately after her words, so Gaku just blinks and walks back to the living room. Everyone seems to already get dressed, and Uzuki is wearing weird clothes he's never thought he'd ever wear, but it's Halloween after all.
Walking up to join his friend, a hand taps on his shoulder before he reaches Uzuki. Nagumo is there behind him when he turns around.
"Oh."
And that’s the first thing the other says when their eyes meet. The voice leaving his lips is soft that it comes out quite hard to hear. Those eyes go wide for a mere second before Nagumo's expression is back to that playful smile he always wears. His gaze fixes on him in a beat of silence between them, and after a long stare that Gaku doesn't really know what it means, the other lets out a low laugh.
"Looks like you’ve just became a dead prince."
"Isn't that what you're going for?"
Nagumo grins, "spooky."
Gaku eyes the other. Nagumo is wearing clothes that looks like a school uniform with green striped tie, a black robe, and green scarf that goes with his tie. He feels like he's seen it somewhere, but the memory about the said outfit is too vague.
"What are you?"
When he asks, the other opens his arms wide, grinning.
"I'm a Slytherin student."
"What?"
There is a pause that makes Gaku feel like everything has stopped moving, and they are stuck in this dead silence. The raven hair’s eyes go wide and his mouth hangs open as he stares at him.
"From Harry potter?"
When he doesn't say anything, Nagumo adds, "Hogwarts? These things are in the USJ too?"
Gaku shrugs.
"Never heard of it."
The other looks at him as if he has just heard the most absurd thing in the world. It somehow makes his face burn in embarrassment, so he pushes past Nagumo and heads towards the kitchen to grab something to drink.
Luckily, the raven hair doesn't follow to mock him for not knowing this harry potter thing.
—
Gaku finally finds the peace he wants in the corner of the living room where they are holding the party. All the decorations they’ve prepared are up by now and the Jack-o’-lantern he carved with Nagumo are put around the area. The difference between their skills is too obvious just by a quick glance at those pumpkins, and it hurts his soul just by looking at it.
He takes a seat on the sofa, a drink in one of his hands and the manga in the other. The music Akao picks is so loud and Gaku won’t really describe it as Halloween music, but whatever. He’s just here because they force him to join anyway.
Looking up from the volume he’s almost done reading, he sees Uzuki dancing with Rion. Or to be more precise, Rion is trying to get his friend to dance to the upbeat music he’s never heard before. It’s a funny sight to look at because just like him, Uzuki has never been a fan of parties, but Gaku guesses he opens up more after hanging out with her.
A tall figure approaches him when he shifts his attention from his book to the surroundings. And by a couple of long strides, Nagumo pops up beside him with a long stick in his hand.
When he stares at it, the other moves the stick around and eventually points it at his face.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m casting a spell on you. I’m a wizard after all.”
So, that long stick is a wand.
Gaku huffs, “bullshit.”
Nagumo hums, obviously doesn’t care about his harsh word. He waves the wand around, creating weird sounds of that long stick sharply cut through the air with each movement. Those eyes also follow the movement of it, and Gaku somehow feels like he’s watching him dance in weird styles.
“Aren’t you going to ask what kinds of spell I’m trying to use on you?” The voice asks. Nagumo’s eyes evade from the thing in his hand to him, his hand still moving, whipping the wand and creating an imaginary curve line above his head.
Gaku stares back and shrugs.
“I don’t wanna know.”
“I’m telling you anyway,” the other draws a circle in the air in front of him with the wand, “it’s a spell to make you get up and dance.”
“If that’s so, you better focus on your study more because your magic clearly doesn’t work.”
Nagumo chuckles, eyeing the long stick he’s holding, “that’s so weird. It works on everyone though.”
He proceeds to touch his chin with his fingers, acting like he’s considering something important, and Gaku somehow finds it surprisingly amusing to see which excuses he will be coming up with next.
But after a silent oh that is used to exaggerate the moment he finally gets an idea of something, Nagumo puts his wand away on the coffee table nearby.
The upbeat music playing in the background begins to fade before it is replaced with the soft ones as the other stands in front of him, his expression shifts from a playful smile to absolute calm that Gaku almost thinks something wrong might happen, and he looks into his eyes.
The sudden change in the atmosphere confuses him. The air, too, get tense, making him unintentionally holds his breath.
As the brief moment of silence goes on, soft music is the only thing echoing in the space between them. And after a beat of too long eye contact that draws him into those black round eyes, Nagumo bows gracefully and holds out a hand.
"Dance with me, Your Highness."
Somehow, those words make his face burn, but Gaku isn't sure if it's the embarrassment or the words themselves that catches him off guard. Nagumo looks right into his eyes, the sparkle in those round eyes mixed between amuse and something he can't put into words.
It's quite tempting, as if he's playing truth or dare, but he decides to not give in.
"No."
Nagumo tilts his head to the side a little and smiles.
"If you dance, I'll let you go home right after this."
That’s obviously a lie he’s using to make him join, but Gaku finds himself letting out a long sigh and stands up without taking the offered hand anyway.
Even if he gave in, it'd be just one time — just this time and it wouldn't hurt, right?
“Fine.”
Although he agreed to do this, he completely doesn't know how to dance, so he just bobs his head to the music and taps his foot to the beat. The songs playing from the tiny speakers in the middle of the room are slow, and Gaku finds it hard to match his moves to their rhythms.
And amidst this disaster he’s got himself into, Nagumo keeps looking at him with those eyes clearly amused.
"Woah, you're a great dancer!"
Gaku huffs, "shut up."
The other steps closer, his voice still hinted with laughter, as he takes both of his hand and holds them loosely. Those round eyes look into his as Nagumo guides him to move to the soft music.
"Just mirror my steps, and even you will be able to dance like a pro."
"Even me?"
The raven hair exaggerates the painful expression when he intentionally steps on his foot, a playful smile curling on his lips as he moves his lower body away as far as he can without letting go of Gaku's hands.
"That hurts!"
"No, it doesn't."
"It does!"
When he doesn’t play along and just stares blankly at the other, Nagumo shamelessly chuckles.
His cheerful laugh still echoes in the air as he holds Gaku’s hands a little tighter and guides him to move to the slow beat. Their feet tangle at the first few steps when Gaku’s attempt to match the other’s move turns out too clumsy. Somehow, Nagumo is more patient than he expected, and not even a single complaint ever leaves his lips even though he almost steps on him way too many times.
Gaku looks down to carefully watch his steps, trying to synchronize his move with Nagumo. He steps forward when the other’s leg moves back, and steps back when Nagumo is about to move towards him. It’s a basic move for the dance, Gaku can tell, and it’s easy enough even for someone inexperience like him to follow along and get better at it in a short time.
Seeing him make quite a good process, Nagumo leans forward, bending down enough for him to catch a glimpse of Gaku’s lowering gaze. The angle is awkward and their eyes don’t really meet, but Gaku can still see the other approaching him from the corner of his eyes.
When he lifts his gaze from their feet, Nagumo’s face is a few inches away from him. Those round eyes are looking into his, soft smile curling on the other’s lips.
“What?”
The raven hair’s voice is unusually quiet, but it still holds a hint of playfulness as he speaks.
“Look at me, not the floor.”
Somehow, Gaku can feel his face burn hearing those words, and he isn’t sure if Nagumo can notice how his expression slightly shifts by them. Their eyes still lock on each other’s as the other straightens himself up, also taking his gaze with him.
And Nagumo smiles, his eyes sparkling in the dim light.
It is a stunning sight to see, and it takes his breath away for a mere moment. His legs wobbles, tangling with Nagumo's as he loses his rhythms. The other's hands grabs onto his tightly to keep him steady, chuckling ever so slightly at his clumsy steps.
The next moment Gaku knows, he is lowering his gaze to the floor again. Their steps are back to perfectly match each other’s rhythm this time as he silently observes them, and every single move of it performs exactly right to the beat of the music.
When he finally stops worrying about stepping on the other’s feet and look up, Nagumo meets his eyes.
“That’s right,” the other speaks quietly. It makes him feel weird that Nagumo obviously tries too hard to keep his voice calm and low, “you’re doing great, Your Highness. Now, keep your gaze upon me, your humble dance partner for this evening.”
Huh?
Those words make him pause, and suddenly it clicks in his head. The reason why the other tries hard to appear too graceful, too calm.
So, this is what he’s been trying to say.
Even the person himself can barely bite back his laugh as he says the cringiest shit Gaku has ever heard his entire life. And although Nagumo is able to keep his expression soft and serene, his clearly amused eyes are observing him in clear interests, as if he dares him to say or do something about it.
When Gaku pretends to ignore it, the other quirks his brow. And he’s obviously having too much fun.
“What is it, Your Highness?”
“Stop it.”
Nagumo let out a soft chuckle when he demands through grinding teeth.
“But you’re a prince today.”
With frown, Gaku retreats both of his hands from the other’s grip, but the raven hair is still fast enough to reach and grasp him again before he can completely back away, his features immediately soften and plaster with a smile.
“I’m just joking, don’t go.”
Just as he’s about to say something, soft and sweet melody interrupts them. It’s a song he has heard somewhere before, maybe from those times Uzuki plays it for them when they hang out, but he can’t recall it exactly.
The other’s voice is soft as it cuts through the sound of music hanging in the air, but firm enough to shake him out of his daze. The touch on his hands loosens up a little as if to see if he would pull back again.
When Gaku just lets those hands hold onto his without trying to get away, Nagumo gives him a soft squeeze on the back of his hands and asks, “can I have the final dance, then?”
He gives a shrug as an answer.
The other shrugs too, obviously mimicking him, but Gaku surprisingly doesn’t find it frustrating this time.
Soft music is echoing in the room, but it sounds to him as if it’s been played from faraway, as Nagumo holds his hands loosely to guide him through the dance as he always does. Everything seems to go slow, even much slower than ever before this time — from the way they move to the way those eyes linger on him. So slow that it feels like time might be able to stop if their eyes ever meet.
It feels weird to hold hands and dance to a song like this with Nagumo. The soft melody sounds too personal and too affectionate in his ears in a way he finds himself trying not to think much of it, of how he supposes to feel. The other’s hands are warm, it’s one of the things he has come to notice as they move slowly to the music, and Nagumo’s slowing his steps even more just to match Gaku’s clumsy ones.
Another thing he also has come to notice is how they rarely look at each other now, although he catches Nagumo stealing glances at him from the corner of his eyes. But Gaku doesn’t think he will be able to look straight into those eyes at times like this too. Everything just feels so weird, and so tense, as if one wrong move could ruin whatever they are having right now in a mere second.
Nagumo slows them down as the song begins to fade. The grip on his hands is still there even after they already stop when the new song is being played. The similar sweet melody as the last one surrounds them as it begins to fill the room.
The other looks at him for the first time in a while, the unreadable glints visible in those eyes that linger for a brief moment of silence between them, before he leans in closer. Those round eyes are still on him, the sparkle in them already vanished, turning into the usual dark void Gaku can’t make of.
And Nagumo smiles, looking as cheerful as usual as he swings their intertwined hands around.
"Do you enjoy tonight?"
Gaku stiffens his arms to stop the swing and, "no," is the first thing he bursts out, but he later corrects himself. "Well, it's not that bad."
The other chuckles.
"Am I going to see you again at the Christmas party?"
He shrugs, "maybe."
A soft smile curls on Nagumo's lips, and his eyes sparkle with something Gaku can't quite describe. His expression softens as he lets go of his hands, but those eyes linger on him for a beat too long before evading to the other side of the room.
"I'll take that as a promise then."
"What?"
When the other smiles and shrugs, Gaku just knows he won't take no as an answer — and all these aren't going to be the one time thing he wants them to be at all.