Work Text:
2013.09.05
It’s a little over a year now.
Jungkook thought.
He took a sip of cappuccino as he watched the raindrops silently fell down onto the beautiful, foreign city from the coffee shop’s window. His gaze then fell on the camera that was sitting on the table, the one thing that had been with him since the beginning of his journey and held all of his memories.
Jungkook was born in a wealthy family and that probably made him luckier than a lot of other kids. It was true that he never had to worry about not having enough food to eat or not having clothes to wear, but he had never received any love in that so called home.
His mother died when he was five and he spent more time with the maids than his father. His older brother had never even spared him a smile; he grew up surrounded by loneliness. When he finally finished university with a business degree that was useless to him because from the beginning, it was decided that his brother was going to carry on his father’s business; he left his home with the camera to travel the world. Fortunately, he had been saving and he was working part-time the whole time during university, he was able to finally do something that he wanted to do.
He didn’t decide to travel around just for the purpose of getting away from his family, he was trying to look for answers. He was trying to find his true passion, he was trying to look for the meaning of his life.
He was trying to find himself.
And it was already a few months over a year, he still didn’t find what he was looking for and now, he was in Toronto, hoping that at least he was closer to the answer.
———-
Jungkook was sitting cross-legged on the hotel bed with his laptop carefully balanced on his legs. He was uploading the pictures he took that day to his laptop, so he could post them onto his blog. He started the blog when he began his travel and he posted all his favourite photos on it.
Under the photo, he typed a sentence:
I’m here, in Toronto, still trying to find the answers.
His phone vibrated almost immediately after he posted the photo, it was a kakaotalk message from Jimin:
YOU ARE IN TORONTO! I can’t believe it, I really want to meet you and show you around, but I’m not in the city right now, I will be back after two days. Will you still be here?
The message brought a smile to Jungkook’s face and he messaged back.
Jungkook:
I will be here, I won’t miss the opportunity to finally meet you.
Jimin:
Good!
Jimin also sent a very stupid sticker, something that he really liked to do.
Jungkook closed his laptop, put down his phone and lied down. He couldn’t really describe his relationship with Jimin, he didn’t know what they were. Maybe best friends would be a nice term to describe them, despite the fact that they had never met each other, they were super close.
Jimin was the person that was with him since the beginning of his journey.
It all started when he posted his first photo on his blog, Jimin was the first one to comment, to compliment. It surprised Jungkook, it really did and since then, Jimin alway complimented on Jungkook’s photo and it made Jungkook curious and wanting to get to know Jimin. Soon, they started to talk and it didn’t even take long for Jungkook to trust Jimin. He told Jimin almost everything about him.
He learned that Jimin was two years older than him, a watercolour painter and he was quite famous. Jungkook had searched him up and his painting was everywhere on the internet; he saw them on Tv as well. However, Jimin had never put himself in the public, the reason he gave Jungkook was that he wanted to live like a normal person.
The fact that he started to trust Jimin in rather a short amount of time was quite shocking to Jungkook himself, but Jimin was special.
Really special to Jungkook.
Jimin was always there for him, he was there to cheer him up when he was feeling down; he was there to accompany Jungkook when he was feeling lonely; he was there to support him when he was in doubt; he was there to talk and comfort him when he was stressed.
Jimin was his rock.
———-
Jungkook was in white shirt and black suit, standing in an art exhibition, to be more specific, it was Jimin’s art exhibition. Jungkook hadn’t wear something so formal for so long, it made him a little uncomfortable. Jungkook was there because Jimin decided that it was the perfect place for their first meeting and he sent Jungkook the invitation.
Jungkook had seen pictures of Jimin’s paintings from the internet before, but from up close, the real ones just looked unbelievably stunning. He was too busy to admire the paintings that he almost forgot he came to meet Jimin.
He had never seen any pictures of Jimin before, all he knew about Jimin’s appearance was he had orange hair. Jimin simply told Jungkook to not worry, he would find him.
Jungkook glanced around, seeing those rich people in the suit, talking to each other with fake smiles reminded him his family. Those people disguised Jungkook; they were just hiding their ugly faces under the masks.
He spotted an orange haired male in a black suit, holding a glass of wine, talking to a middle-aged man. From where he was standing, Jungkook could only see the orange haired male’s back, but the looked well built, even though he appeared slim, he definitely had some muscles. Jungkook also noticed that he was a little shorter than him.
Just when Jungkook was contemplating whether he should go talk to the orange haired male who he assumed was Jimin or he should just wait for Jimin to find him, the orange haired male turned around and looked around the place.
Their eyes met for the first time and Jungkook felt his heart skip a beat before it started to accelerate.
The orange haired male smiled, eyes turning into crescents, dazzling like sunshine.
His smile is breathtaking.
The orange haired male walked toward him, one hand in his pocket, another hand still holding the glass of wine and looking stunning as fuck. Jungkook couldn’t tear his eyes off of him and it felt as if the world stopped around him.
The orange haired male stopped in front of him and the smile on his face never faded away, “You must be Jungkook, I’m Jimin. Nice to meet you.” Jimin’s voice was a little high pitched but Jungkook liked it, it sounded melodic and angelic.
“I’m happy to finally get to meet you, Jimin.” Jungkook tried to sound as calm as he could, even though his heart was beating faster than normal.
“You look even more handsome than the pictures.” Jungkook felt his face heat up at the words.
Why do I blush so easily?
Jungkook muttered a thanks and Jimin’s smile widened, “Have you look around?” Jimin asked.
“Not really,” Jungkook answered, his eyes wandered past Jimin because he was pretty sure that his brain would not function properly if he kept looking at Jimin straight in the eyes. Then he froze when he saw the painting behind Jimin.
Jungkook was drew to the painting, he couldn’t recognize what Jimin was saying as he walked towards the painting subconsciously and didn’t notice the knowing smile on Jimin’s face.
The painting was based on one of his photographs, the one he took in Vienna. The photo captured an empty street in the city, right after the rain, the wet street was glistening with a shine of rain. The atmosphere was calm and relaxing. Jungkook remembered that day clearly: when he was walking on the empty street with the intention of enjoying the beautiful view, he cried, probably for the first time ever since he left home. No, it wasn’t because he regretted his decision, he never did and never will. He didn’t know why, he just suddenly felt a wave of loneliness and sadness hit him; his emotions overflowed and tears just fell uncontrollably. But after he wiped away his tears, he was never so sure about his decision, he had never so firmly wanted to continue his path.
Jimin expressed the photo with his own style of drawing, the photograph was turned into black and white watercolour painting and the only pop of color in the painting was the red leaves not he tree on the side of the street.
Beautiful, stunning.
“Le Cadeau.” Jungkook read out the name of the painting.
“Yes, it is a gift for you. Do you like it?” Jimin asked. Jungkook remembered that he mentioned to Jimin on the day he posted this photo that this was his favourite photo and he thought it would always remain to be his favourite.
He remembers.
“I love it.” Jungkook’s voice was light and soft, as if the three words didn’t weight anything, but it did. Even though it was light as a feather, it brushed over Jimin’s heart and made him flutter.
Jimin never knew just one person’s recognition could mean the whole world to him and the smile on the younger’s face was the most precious thing ever.
Jungkook gazed at the painting for another few moments, entranced and reluctant to leave.
———-
Jungkook was sitting on the rooftop of a tall building, legs dangling off the edge. He was a little startled when a cold object was suddenly pressed to his cheek. He turned his head and met with Jimin’s warm smile, he returned the smile. Jimin handed him the can of beer and settled down beside him.
“Thank you, Jiminie.” Since the first day they started talking, Jungkook had never called Jimin hyung, at first, it was simply because he didn’t know that Jimin was older than him, but afterwards, they were just used to it and Jimin grew up in Toronto, so he didn’t care about it so much. To speck the truth, Jimin actually loved when Jungkook called him “Jiminie”, and when he heard it in person, it gave him butterflies.
“Welcome to my “get away place”, my friend.” Jimin said as he threw an arm over Jungkook’s shoulder. Jimin had suggested to go to somewhere quiet, so they could talk and that was why they ended up on the rooftop.
“You really don't need to stay at your art show?” Jungkook asked after he took a sip of the beer.
“It doesn’t make a difference if I stay or not.” Jimin said casually, “That’s why I don’t make my identity public, I won’t be trapped there.”
“Don’t you want to see people’s reaction to your painting?”
“You saw those people in my art show, probably only 10% of them were actually there for the purpose of art. Those rich people were just trying to show off that they are high class people. They don't understand my art, no one does.” the last few words were barely a whisper, but Jungkook caught it. The faint bitter smile on Jimin’s face tugged his heart, and he sighed softly.
They were the same, they were both lonely people who wanted to be understood.
Jungkook stared at Jimin’s side-face, a ray of moonlight rested on his face and Jimin was glowing in the dark night.
Jungkook didn’t answer, he didn’t know what to say. After a moment of silence, he found himself asking, “Jiminie, are you happy?”
“Why?” Jimin looked at Jungkook in confusion.
Instead of answering, Jungkook asked another question, “Are you lonely?”Jimin frowned as he continued to look at the younger in bewilderment.
Jungkook sighed again, “I don’t know, it was probably simply because of the colour, but I just felt loneliness from looking at your painting.”
“Are you happy?” Jimin asked, “Are you lonely? You are by yourself all the time.”
“Jiminie, you forgot one thing, I was never alone, you were always there with me.” Jungkook smiled widely at Jimin, happiness twinkling in his eyes like stars.
“You are right, I was always with you.”
“And I’m happy, because I’m doing what I love.” Jungkook said, sounded too innocent and simpleminded to Jimin because if being in the society only taught Jimin one thing that would be doing what you love doesn't necessarily make you happy. But it did for Jungkook.
“Then I guess I’m happy.” Jimin said.
———-
Jimin didn’t broke his promise of being Jungkook’s tourist guide and for the next two weeks, they met almost everyday. Jimin took Jungkook to a lot of different places and Jimin was fascinated by how Jungkook could always capture the unique beauty in things. They got along really well and they found comfort in the each other’s presence.
The first time Jungkook went in Jimin’s house because Jimin woke up late and Jungkook was already waiting for him outside. He felt bad that Jungkook had to stand outside and wait for him so he invited Jungkook in.
When Jimin opened the door, bleary-eyed and fluffy orange hair was messy, strings sticked out here and there, Jungkook’s heart skipped a beat because of how cute the elder looked. He had to physically restrain himself from touching Jimin’s soft hair.
“Morning.” Jimin’s voice was hoarse and thick with sleepiness, very different from his normal voice but it was quite attractive.
“Morning, Jiminie.” Jungkook said with a smile. Jimin let Jungkook in and told him that he could sit or look around while waiting for him to get ready.
Jimin’s house was spacious and modern-styled with grey as the dominant hue. Jungkook frowned slightly, because even though it was indeed a nice decorated place but it just didn't feel cozy, it felt cold, it was lacking the feeling of home.
While walking around in Jimin’s house, a piano attracted Jungkook’s attention. He hadn’t played piano for a long time. He opened the lid carefully and his fingers gently touched the keys.
“You know how to play the piano?” Jimin’s voice made Jungkook look up and he saw the orange head was leaning on the wall, in light washed ripped jeans and a simple white tee, hair being pulled back with a snapback.
“Yea, I started since I was four.” Jungkook looked at the piano for a moment before asking, “Do you want to hear me play?”
“Sure.” Jimin walked over and stood in front of the piano as Jungkook sat down and started playing.
It was Chopin’s Nocturne op.9 No.2. A popular piece of music that was played by many people. Jimin watched Jungkook’s long and slim fingers danced on the piano keys and the beautiful music flooded in the room. Jimin fell into the enchanting tune and melancholy melody and he could sense the sadness as Jungkook played the piece.
“That was amazing.” Jimin commented after Jungkook finished the piece.
Jungkook offered a small smile, “This is the only piece that I still remember how to play.” he said as he closed the lid of the piano, Jimin sat down beside him.
“It has a special meaning to you?”
“It was my mother’s favourite piece.” Jungkook said with a small voice, to him, that piece of music was a symbol of his mother.
“Do you still remember anything about her?” Jimin asked. Jungkook didn’t know why but Jimin’s voice just had the ability to make him feel comfortable and relaxed.
“Not really. But she was a beautiful woman, loving, and warm-hearted.” Jungkook was staring at the piano, sadness obvious in his eyes, “I wish she is here.”
They were the same, they both desired to be loved.
Jimin didn’t know how to comfort him, he just simply rubbed Jungkook’s back soothingly in the attempt to tell the younger that he was there for him and Jungkook flashed him a small smile, “Let’s go, Jiminie.”
———-
After spending another day exploring the city, Jimin took Jungkook to one of his favourite book store. There was a small coffee shop inside, so they got themselves a cup of coffee and sat down on the sofa.
The book store had a vintage feeling to it and it had a warm atmosphere. Both of them enjoyed the tranquility in the store and Jungkook took a lot of photography of the place.
They were just talking when Jimin spotted someone he knew. Jimin walked up to him and greeted him, they seemed to know each other very well. Jungkook watched them from where he was sitting, more like admired Jimin.
Jungkook felt that something is different when Jimin was talking to other people. He couldn't quite catch it but then he suddenly realized that unlike when Jimin was with him, Jimin’s smile never reached his eyes when he was with others.
Jungkook’s next thought surprised himself.
Does that make me special?
———-
Yes, Jungkook was special to Jimin.
Jimin never thought about making friends on the internet but he did, Jungkook was the first one and probably he would be the last one.
At first, it was just his photographs that attracted his attention and he simply wanted to compliment Jungkook to give him some support because he knew how hard it was to do what you love without any support.
Then, when the younger contacted him, according to his personality, he would’ve just ignored him. But he didn’t, something was urging him to get to know about Jungkook.
Jimin was surprised how quick they became close and how quick he opened up to Jungkook. However, he always considered the younger as his best friend.
It wasn’t until one time, when he was with Taehyung, his best friend since high school, he got a kakaotalk message from Jungkook and he smiled unconsciously. Taehyung almost spited out his water when he saw the smile on Jimin’s face.
Jimin always appeared as a positive, happy person in front of everyone, but if they watch closely, they can see that he wasn’t truly happy, but no one did. He was someone who doesn’t open up to people easily and even though he smiled a lot in front of people, those smiles were fake. Taehyung was the only one Jimin opened up to mostly because they had known each other forever, so he could tell the difference.
That was why Taehyung couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw Park Jimin was smiling at his phone with a true smile.
“You are so in love.” Taehyung commented.
Taehyung said that as a joke but it got Jimin thinking about his relationship about Jungkook.
Jimin thought he might like Jungkook more than just a friend, and when he knew Jungkook was at Toronto, he wanted to meet the younger and to confirm his feelings.
After spending all those time with Jungkook, Jimin was sure that he liked Jungkook.
In fact, he might be falling in love with Jungkook.
———-
I like Jimin
That was the conclusion that Jungkook reached after lying on his hotel bed for an hour, listening to some instrumental music that he hated before. He couldn’t get the image of Jimin’s breathtaking eye-smile out of his mind. He started thinking back to the past week with Jimin, he didn’t know when he started to like Jimin or why he liked Jimin.
Maybe it was because Jimin gave him the support that he never received before.
Maybe it was because Jimin gave him the feeling of home.
Maybe it was because Jimin made him feel special.
Maybe it was because in a week, Jimin made him smile more than he ever did in the first 24 years of his life.
No matter what the reason was, Jungkook was sure that he like Jimin.
Maybe, maybe it’s not a bad idea to settle down in Toronto.
———-
Jimin had never panicked so much in the 25 years of his life, he was always a calm person, but just thinking back about that small accident while sitting on the bench in the hospital waiting for Jungkook almost put him into a panic attack.
Rewind 3 hours.
Jungkook was able to find an empty abandoned factory and convinced Jimin to go with him to check it out. Jimin had to admit that it was pretty impressive, the structure was around three stories high and it was made out of brick. It had a sense of history; there were broken windows here and there with some graffitis outside which were simply amazing art to Jimin.
“It’s pretty fabulous, huh?” Jungkook said while taking some photos.
“It would look even better in your photos.” Jungkook gave Jimin a toothy grin and then said: “Let’s go inside.”
“What? Are we even allowed to go inside?”
Jungkook shrugged, “There’s no sign saying that we can’t go inside and we are already here, so why not checking out the inside as well.”
“But…there might be ghost inside.” Jimin regretted immediately after he said it, when did he become a scaredy cat.
Jungkook gave him a “are you kidding me” look before pushing the rusty door open and went in, Jimin followed him. The factory was empty and dusty which was perfect for Jungkook. He loved those old, weird places, they appeared more interesting in photos.
After walking around for a while, Jungkook found a ladder that could lead to the roof of the factory and he urged Jimin to go up there with him.
Jimin refused Jungkook’s offer, “The ladder looks dangerous, I’m not going up there. You shouldn’t either.”
“Come on, Jiminie.” Jungkook whined.
“You might hurt yourself.” Jimin said warily.
“I won’t, you can stay here if you want to. I will go by myself.” Jungkook sounded like a stubborn kid. Without even hearing an answer, Jungkook was already climbing up the ladder. Jimin debated whether to go up with the younger or stay there as he watched Jungkook disappeared from his sight.
“Jiminie, I’m just going to take some pictures, I will be down soon. You don’t have to come up.” Jungkook said from the rooftop.
Jungkook appeared again in less than ten minutes and Jimin smiled at him from the bottom.
“Jiminie~ I wish you came up with me, the view was spectacular from up there. But it’s okay, I took some pictures, so I could share the view with you.” Jungkook muttered as he was climbing down the ladder, Jimin chuckled. “Honestly, it would be better for you to see it in person though, you should’ve… AH!” Jungkook suddenly slipped when he was still three steps away from the ground and he let out a loud yelp.
It happened so quick that Jimin didn’t even had the chance to react. The boy who was still muttering cutely at him a minute ago, now was on the ground, hissing out of pain. Jimin rushed to Jungkook’s side and wanted to check where he got hurt but he was scared to touch him.
Jimin was panicking, hands shaking and on the verge of crying. He was scared, worried and he was blaming himself. He should’ve stand beside Jungkook; he should’ve protected him; he should’ve…
Jungkook hissed and Jimin snapped out of his thoughts, “Where did you hurt yourself?”
“I didn’t fall from really high, I should be fine.” the younger mumbled and tried to move his arms and legs. When he was trying to move his left ankle, a sudden pain caused him to hiss out loud.
Jimin rolled up the bottom of Jungkook’s jeans and saw that his ankle was already a little red. “You probably sprained your ankle.” he touched the younger’s ankle slightly and the younger immediately flinched, Jimin’s heart ached at the pained look on Jungkook’s face.
Jimin didn’t want to put more pressure on Jungkook’s already injured ankle, so he piggybacked the younger outside. Jungkook was insisting that he could walk, but he immediately shut his mouth and obeyed Jimin after the elder gave him a hard stare.
Jungkook didn’t say anything the whole time on Jimin’s back, Jimin had never give him a stare like that before, he could tell that Jimin was a little angry at him because he didn’t listen to him and hurt himself. But he knew Jimin was angrier at himself and he was blaming himself which made Jungkook regret his action even more.
“Does it hurt a lot?” Jimin asked gently.
“Not really.” Jungkook mumbled. No one had ever cared about him so much and treated him with so much love. Tears forming in his eyes and he subconsciously tightened his hold on Jimin’s neck, buried his face against Jimin’s back. Jimin’s scent was reassuring and comforting.
“Sorry, Jiminie.” Jungkook’s voice was muffled by Jimin’s T-shirt, “I should’ve listened to you.”
Jimin sighed softly, “Just try to not injure yourself again, it hurts me to see you in pain.”
Fortunately, they weren’t in some isolated village, it was only a ten minute walk for them to get to a major road. Jimin called a cab and they went to the hospital. Even though, the injury didn’t seem serious, Jimin still wanted to make sure that Jungkook didn’t hurt any bone.
“Jiminie.” Jungkook’s voice pulled Jimin out of his thoughts.
Jimin stood up and looked at Jungkook for a moment, “What did the doctor say?”
“I sprained my ankle but it would heal soon.” Jungkook said.
After hearing that, Jimin could finally stop worrying, “Let’s go home.” Jimin started to walk away but Jungkook held his wrist to stop him.
“Stop being mad, Jiminie.” Jimin turned around and saw Jungkook’s head was hanging low looked like a child who did something wrong.
Jimin’s eyes softened, “I wasn’t mad at you, Jungkook-ah.”
“Stop being mad at yourself, it wasn’t your fault.”
“Okay.” Jimin was surprised that Jungkook could read him so well, “Let’s go.”
Even though Jimin agreed, Jungkook knew Jimin probably wouldn’t stop blaming himself. Ah, he really made a wrong decision. Jungkook had never regret something so much in his life.
Jimin wanted to carry Jungkook again, but the younger insisted to walk since it wasn’t a long walk. Jimin didn’t argue, just let Jungkook hold on his shoulder as support and walked slowly.
Jimin insisted on letting Jungkook stay at his place so he could take care of him. Jungkook didn’t fight with Jimin, he knew that was the only way could help Jimin to stop feeling guilty about the whole incident.
Jimin let Jungkook stayed at the room downstairs so he didn’t need to walk stairs, “I will go to the hotel to get your luggages tomorrow and check out the room for you.” Jimin told Jungkook as he took out the blanket from the closet for the younger.
Jungkook was sitting on the bed, hugging a pillow to his chest as Jimin applied the cream on his sprained ankle. It was nice to be take cared of for once and it was nice to be with Jimin.
Jungkook didn’t make a sound the whole time, but Jimin knew that it probably hurt a lot. He got the younger an ice bag for the swelling after finishing applying the cream.
Jungkook was still hugging the pillows, brows furrowed together, probably due to the pain before and held the ice bag on his swelling angle. Jimin ruffled Jungkook’s hair affectionately.
I want to keep you forever, Jungkook.
———-
Jimin and Jungkook started their lives living together since then, After a week, Jungkook’s ankle was almost healed but either of them talked about Jungkook moving out of Jimin’s house.
Jimin went back home with bags of grocery and saw Jungkook sitting on the ground in the living room in an oversized white t-shirt and grey sweatpants, legs spread out, doing a puzzle . Jimin couldn't contain the smile that was creeping on his face.
Having someone waiting for you at home is such a nice feeling.
Jimin felt warmth spread in his heart just seeing Jungkook quietly sitting there,; his house didn’t feel that cold anymore. His place was now occupied by Jungkook’s stuff, he learned that Jungkook didn’t really like organizing and cleaning. But it didn’t bother Jimin so much. His house finally had the feeling of home.
“Can’t you see that I’m carrying a lot of groceries? You are not even going to help me? ” Jimin yelled.
“Jiminie~ my ankle is not healed yet.” Jungkook said with a whiney tone, eyes still focused on his fascinating puzzle.
“Lies, you can walk perfectly by this point. You are just being lazy, brat.” Jimin said, still smiling while putting away all the groceries.
He sat across Jungkook on the floor and just took a moment to look at the younger. Jungkook hadn’t get a haircut for a while, bangs already reached his beautiful dark brown eyes which made him appear younger than he was. Sometimes, Jimin couldn’t even believe how handsome Jungkook can be just in simple t-shirt.
“You should get a haircut.” Jimin said softly.
Jungkook just hummed as response.
“I can’t believe you care about the puzzle more than me.” Jimin said, sounding a little angry that the younger wasn’t talking to him. Wait, is he getting jealous over puzzles?!
Jungkook chuckled, “You are so childish, Jiminie.”
“Who are you calling me childish, you are the one doing ironman puzzles.” Jimin teased Jungkook.
Jungkook sticked his tongue out at Jimin, “Ah, you brat.” Jimin tackled the younger down and started tickling the younger which made Jungkook laugh and squirm on the floor and accidentally messed up the puzzles.
“Ahhh, Jiminie!!!! I worked so hard on it, it’s all your fault.”
———-
Jimin always spent his birthday with Taehyung since he didn’t really have any other close friends. However, this year, Jungkook suggested to have a birthday party for Jimin, just the two of them, so Jimin abandoned his best friend without any hesitation.
Jungkook wanted to eat hot pot for dinner, so Jimin took Jungkook to supermarket to buy some food. It wasn’t until they were at the supermarket, Jimin suddenly realized that something was wrong; Wait, it was his birthday why was Jungkook deciding what they eat.
Jungkook was really a kid that never grew up, that was the thought Jimin had when they were in the supermarket. Jungkook was literally wanting to get all the candies and chips that appeared in his sight and when Jimin refused, Jungkook would whine and pout like a little kid. But Jimin had to admit the younger was super adorable.
Jimin and Jungkook had a very nice dinner; the younger sang happy birthday to Jimin and ate cake together. Afterwards, Jungkook and Jimin opened a can of beers and started drinking in the living room.
Jimin didn’t like drinking that much but Jungkook convinced him this time by saying that he only have birthday once every year, so he should take the opportunity and just let it all out.
They were just talking about random things, sharing stories of their childhood, after few rounds, Jungkook was only a little tipsy, on the other hand, Jimin was already drunk, giggling uncontrollably. Oh my gosh, so damn cute. Jimin’s high pitched giggles were songs to Jungkook’s ear; Jungkook decided that drunk Jimin might be his favourite Jimin.
Jimin was in a half lying down position, head resting against the sofa handle, legs on Jungkook’s thighs. Jungkook watched Jimin laugh with a smile on his own face. The smiley eyes and the sound of his laughter made Jungkook feel lightheaded.
“Jiminie.” Jungkook took another sip of beer, “What am I to you?” Jungkook would never have the courage to ask that if he was sober.
“You?” Jimin stopped laughing and sat up from his position, legs still on Jungkook’s thighs, looked at Jungkook in the eyes. Jungkook lost himself in Jimin’s gorgeous eyes.
Jimin thought about the answer for a moment, “You, you are my inspiration. I mean you probably won't believe it, but I got a lot of my art inspirations from your photographs. No, no, no, it weren’t just your photographs. It’s you, you gave me a lot of inspirations in life. You also bought happiness in my life, you….” Jimin’s calm explanation turned into adorable rumbling and Jungkook stared at him for a moment, he couldn’t believe he was so important to Jimin. Jimin’s rambling was cut off by a pair of warm lips that pressed onto his. The kiss only lasted a second.
“Jungkook.” Jimin looked at Jungkook with wide eyes. Jungkook stared at Jimin, so beautiful. Maybe it was because of the alcohol in his system, or maybe it was simply because that he didn’t want to hold back anymore. He pressed his lips on to Jimin’s plump ones again, his heart was pounding in his chest so fast. Jimin yelped in surprise and Jungkook took the chance to press his tongue into Jimin’s mouth. He explored the inside of Jimin’s mouth, every inch of it. The taste of alcohol was strong but there was still a sense of sweetness mixed with it, Jimin’s sweetness.
Jimin kissed back after a moment of shock, their tongues danced together in sync. The kiss was slow and passionate; it was like all the feelings that they were holding back all this time exploded. Jungkook gently pushed Jimin back without cutting off the kiss and he hovered over Jimin when the elder was completely lying down on the sofa. Jimin moaned into the kiss and wrapped his arms around Jungkook’s neck. They pulled away reluctantly when they were running out of breath.
Jungkook caressed Jimin’s cheeks tenderly with his thumb and he was looking at Jimin with so much love and affection that made Jimin feel dizzy. This time Jimin was the one who initiated the kiss.
“Bed..bedroom.” was all Jimin was able to say during the heated kiss.
They didn’t fuck that night, they made love. “I love you, Jiminie.” Jungkook whispered as he thrusted into Jimin slowly, deeply, passionately, fingers interwind with Jimin’s.
———-
Jimin woke up first in the morning with a major headache. He hates hangover. He turned his face to see Jungkook sleeping beside him peacefully and one of his arm wrapped around Jimin's waist securely. He remembered everything happened the previous night. He remembered their kiss; he remembered how Jungkook looked at him; he remembered how Jungkook whispered “I love you” to him.
Was it true feeling? or.. just alcohol?
Jimin didn’t want to think about it too much, it would just make his head hurt even more. He decided to take shower first, they fell asleep immediately after the sex that they didn’t even clean up; he felt so disgusting. He carefully removed Jungkook’s arm, didn't want to wake up the younger.
When Jimin came back after shower, Jungkook was sitting on the bed, rubbing his sleepy eyes.
“You are up.” Jimin said.
“Jiminie.” Jungkook’s voice was hoarse from sleep and he was using a whiney tone.
Jimin sat down on the bed and asked warily, “Are you okay? Does your head hurt?”
“I’m fine, I wasn’t as drunk as you.” Jungkook chuckled.
“Do you still remember what happened yesterday…” Jimin avoided Jungkook’s eyes, not knowing how to confront the younger.
“Of course I remember, I literally still have your dried cum sticking on my stomach, how could I forget.”
Jimin blushed a deep shade of red, “Are you regretting it?” he asked carefully.
Jungkook held Jimin’s hands into his, thumb caressing the back of Jimin’s hands. “Jiminie, look at me.” Jimin looked into Jungkook’s eyes, “Do you really think I did it out of impulsion? I said it yesterday, you might think it was all because of alcohol. So I’m going to say it again, when I’m sober, I love you Jiminie.”
Jimin kissed Jungkook slowly and sweetly.
“Be my boyfriend.”
———-
Jimin was sitting on the sofa, scrolling through his phone, Jungkook rested his head on Jimin’s lap and played with one of Jimin’s hand. Jungkook seemed to like Jimin’s chubby, soft hands a lot.
Jimin was unusually quiet that day, Jungkook knew that Jimin was bothered by something and he tried to ask, but the elder just told him there was nothing going on.
“Jiminie.” Jimin just hummed. “Are you sure there is nothing wrong?”
“Yea, everything is fine.”
“Lie.” Jungkook took away Jimin’s phone, “Come on, talk to me now.”
Jimin sighed, it was actually not something serious. It was just that day, he suddenly remembered why Jungkook was in Toronto in the first place. Jungkook was trying to look for answers, look for himself and did that mean Jungkook would leave again. What if he leaves him, what if he doesn’t come back, what if…. Jimin didn’t want to think about the worse scenario.
“When are you leaving?” Jimin’s voice was small.
Jungkook sat up and tilted his head to the side and looked at Jimin in confusion. He almost forgot about his travel since he started being with Jimin.
“When are you…are you going back to your travelling?” Jimin asked.
Jungkook understood immediately, Jimin was scared that he would leave. “I’m not going anywhere, Jiminie.”
“But..” Jimin looked at Jungkook, surprised written on his face, “But didn’t you want to find the answer, wasn’t it the reason why you are here?”
Jungkook shook his head, “I’m not going anywhere without you. Can you stop worrying now?”
Jimin smiled, eyes turning into half moons and Jungkook leaned in to peck on Jimin’s lips, he kept placing light kisses on Jimin’s face, from his pump lips to his cheeks to his beautiful eyes until Jimin was giggling.
“Yah, you are disgusting, you got your slaver all over my face.” But Jimin showed no intention of pushing Jungkook away.
“You are mine, Jiminie.” Jungkook whispered. Jimin’s heart fluttered, he likes how it sound.
Jimin suddenly remembered something and pushed Jungkook away a bit, “Hey, last time, I told you what you are to me. But you never told me what am I to you.”
“You are my rock, Jiminie. You were there when I was weak and vulnerable; you were there when I needed someone to hold on; you were there when I was doubting everything in my life. Even though, you were never physically beside me but you gave me support and encouraged me to continue my journey. And you are here now, giving me a reason to be happy; teaching me how to love someone and…” Jungkook’s sweet voice and those sincere words gave Jimin butterflies feelings and Jimin couldn’t believe that he could become someone’s reason to smile. Tears forming in his eyes because he was touched, and he felt so loved, “And you gave me a home.” Jungkook kissed away the single tear that escaped Jimin’s eyes and continued, “Is that a good answer?”
Jimin nodded and wraps his arms around the younger’s waist to hug him, he rested his head against Jungkook’s chest and listened to his heartbeat.
“I love you.”
———
2014.11.20
Jungkook yawned as he walked into the kitchen. A smile blossom on his face when he saw Jimin cooking lunch. He quietly walked toward Jimin and hugged him from the back, nuzzled his face into the crook of his neck, breathed in Jimin’s fresh scent.
“You finally woke up.” Jimin said, the affectionate is obvious in his voice.
Jungkook let go of Jimin after a while and walked away to the fridge, “What are you doing?” Jimin asked when he saw Jungkook opened the fridge.
“Getting some milk.” Jungkook answered with his face almost buried into the fridge.
Jimin pulled Jungkook away from the fridge and closed the fridge, “No, you are going to eat lunch soon, so no milk for you now. And you are already tall enough, why do you need milk anyways?”
“Meanie.” Jungkook pouted and puffed his cheeks as he went to sit down at the table.
Jimin giggled, “You are such a kid.”
“I’m not!! Hey, I’m taller than you.”
“Don’t you use your height on me.” Jimin was too busy cooking that he didn’t see Jungkook sticking his tongue out at him.
The door bell rang and both Jimin and Jungkook looked toward the door surprisingly. They didn’t usually get visitor.
Jungkook went to open the door and was faced with a familiar face, “What are you doing here?” Jungkook asked after a moment of shock, his face was blank.
“Who’s at the door, Kookie?” Jimin came to the door because Jungkook didn’t return for a while.
Jimin saw a man in a suit, looking like he was around Jimin’s age.
“Hi, I’m Seokjin. Jungkook’s brother.” the man greeted Jimin politely and stretched out a hand.
Jimin shook Seokjin’s hand, “I’m Jimin.” Jungkook was quiet the whole time and he wasn’t showing any sort of emotion but Jimin could sense the cold aura around him which indicated that he wasn’t happy to see Seokjin at all.
“Can I come in?” Seokjin asked, breaking the awkward silence.
“Yes.”, “No” Jimin and Jungkook almost answered at the same time.
“You are not welcomed here.” Jungkook said, Jimin had never seen Jungkook looked so serious before.
“Please give us a moment.” Jimin said to Seokjin politely before pulling Jungkook inside to talk to him privately.
“Just let him in, he’s your brother, Kookie.” Jimin tried to convince Jungkook.
“Brother? He never acted like one before.” the bitterness sipped through the words.
“Don’t be so difficult, Kookie.” Jimin regretted it almost immediately, Jungkook looked like he would snap at him any moment and Jimin did not want to fight with him on this. Plus, he knew how sensitive Jungkook was when it came to the subject of his family.
“I’m sorry.” Jimin interwind their fingers and said softly, “Just let him in and hear him out, can you at least do that for me?”
Jungkook’s eyes softened, “Fine.” Jimin invited Seokjin in and they sat down on the sofa.
“How did you know that I’m here?” Jungkook asked, “Don’t bullshit to me.” Jungkook warned Seokjin. When Seokjin didn't answer, Jungkook was more sure about his assumption, “You sent people to follow me! When did it all start?”
“As soon as you left home.” Seokjin sounded calm, too calm for this situation.
Jungkook laughed bitterly, “And here I am, being so naive, and thought that I could actually escape your watch.”
“I was just trying to make sure your safety.” there were no sign of affection in Seokjin’s tone despite how caring the words were.
“Do you even care?” Jimin squeezed jungkook hand, he didn't want this to turn into a fight.
“I’m your brother, Jungkook.”
“Brother? You really think you qualified as a brother. You never cared about me before.”
“Jungkook, enough.” Jimin warned Jungkook under his breath.
“I’m not here to fight with you. Our father is in the hospital, the doctors said that he wouldn’t have a long time to live. He wants to see you.”
“I’m not going back.” Jungkook stated.
“Jeon Jungkook,” Seokjin raised his voice, “I don’t care if you want to play around, experience with relationship. Even if you want to fuck around, that’s none of my business, you are young, you can do those things, it doesn’t matter. But you have to remember where you belong.” Seokjin looked at Jungkook angrily.
“I belong here, where Jimin is.” Jungkook answered.
“You really want to marry Jimin and be a faggot like him?!” that apparently enraged Jungkook.
“Get out.” there was no emotion in Jungkook’s voice but he was obvious angry. Jimin squeezed Jungkook’s hand again and muttered, “It’s okay, Jungkook, I’m fine.”
However, Jungkook ignored Jimin, it’s not okay, this is not okay, “You can insult me, but I’m not going to allow you insult Jimin.”
“You actually chose to take his side?!” Seokjin looked at Jungkook unbelievably.
“I said get out.” when Seokjin made no sign of leaving, Jungkook yelled, “GET OUT!” the loud words echoed in the room. Jimin had never seen Jungkook so furious before, it actually scared him a bit.
Seokjin calmed himself down and stood up. He took out an envelope and put it on the table, “I apologize for what I said earlier, Jimin.” Then he turned his attention to Jungkook, “Here is the plane ticket for tomorrow, if you changed your mind, you know how to get home.” he left the house when the door closed with a loud pang, the room was uncomfortably silent.
“You really didn’t need to..” Jimin started but Jungkook cut him off, “I couldn’t just sit there and listen to him insult the person that I valued the most in my life.”
Jimin smiled and tugged Jungkook into a side hug, “Am I suppose to be touched right now?” Jimin attempted to lighten up the mood, it only brought a faint smile to Jungkook’s face.
“Come on, let’s eat first, then you can think about it.” Jimin literally had to drag Jungkook away from the sofa to the dinning table. To be honest, Jungkook had already lost his appetite completely because of the previous event, but he knew Jimin spent time cooking, and he didn’t want to let Jimin down, so he ate anyways.
Jungkook grabbed his jacket after they finished lunch and walked toward the door, “Where are you going?” Jimin asked.
“Just going for a walk.”
“I will go with you.”
“No, it’s okay, Jimine. I’m going by myself.” Jimin simply nodded, he didn’t want to push it because he knew that Jungkook needed some time to think and to decide.
“I will be back.” that was the last sentence Jungkook said before he left the house.
———-
Jimin was pacing around the living room and biting his nails nervously. Jungkook left the house around one and it was almost six already, Jimin tried to call the younger but his phone was turned off. Jimin realized that he lost all the contact with Jungkook and he was in the state of being worry, scared and nervous.
He rushed to the door instantly when he heard the click of the lock, “Oh my gosh, you are finally back.” Jimin hurried towards Jungkook.
Jungkook hung up his coat and Jimin went to hold his hand, feeling the need to make sure that the younger was actually there, “Why are you so cold?” Jimin frowned when he got a hold of Jungkook.
He led his boyfriend to the living room and got a cup of hot water to Jungkook, “I was so worried about you.”
“Sorry, Jiminie.”
“I understand that you needed time alone, but promise me next time at least keep your phone on so I could contact you. Or else I would started to think about all the bad scenarios.”
“Sorry.” Jungkook was so quiet that scared Jimin even more.
“Did you make a decision?” Jimin asked.
“I’m not going.”
“Jungkook-ah, he’s your father, even if he never acted like a father. And you will regret it if you don't go. Don’t do anything that you will regret.”
Jungkook looked up at Jimin and Jimin noticed that Jungkook’s eyes were slightly red and puffy, did he cried by himself ? Just thinking about Jungkook crying to himself broke Jimin’s heart.
“Jiminie, if I go back, I might be trapped there and I don’t even know when I will be able to come back.” Jungkook’s eyes were getting teary.
“It’s okay…”
“No, Jiminie, I promised you I’m not going anywhere without you. Maybe, maybe you can go with me and…” Jungkook’s voice got lower and faded into nothing. He knew it was a terrible idea to take Jimin with him. His brother already humiliated Jimin and he didn’t need Jimin to be exposed to more judgement from his family. And Jimin had all of his career and friends in Toronto, he couldn’t just take him away from there. Jungkook stared at the floor, head hung low, shoulders slumped as if the weight on his shoulder was too heavy. It was, but Jungkook had to carry all the weight by himself and it was too cruel for him. Tears rolled down Jungkook’s cheeks, dropped on to the floor and disappeared.
Jimin cupped Jungkook’s face and forced his boyfriend to look at him, “Hey, don’t cry baby. Seeing you cry breaks my heart.” he kissed away Jungkook’s tears “I’ll wait for you. No matter how long it takes, I will wait for you.”
Jungkook hugged Jimin by the waist, and cried into Jimin’s shoulder, tears soaked through the thin material of Jimin’s and also soaked through Jimin’s heart. Jungkook kept murmuring “I’m sorry” and “I love you, Jiminie” into Jimin’s ears and Jimin patted Jungkook’s back soothingly and breathed in Jungkook’s scent, it might be the last time he will be surrounded by Jungkook’s scent; Jimin felt himself was tearing up as well. It felt like forever when they finally broke away from the hug.
“I promise I will come back.”
———-
2015. 05.06
It’s a little over five months since Jungkook left.
Jimin’s house was cold again, when Jungkook left, he took away the the warmth of home. His pillow didn’t smell like Jungkook anymore and it felt like Jungkook was never there.
At first, they were able to talk through phone almost everyday, they video chatted each other too and they texted each other whenever they were free. But after a while, because Jungkook and Jimin both got busy and the time differences made it really difficult for them to talk to each other.
Jimin hadn’t see Jungkook’s face or hear Jungkook’s voice for almost a week now. They still texted each other to gave each other updates on their lives but Jimin wanted to see Jungkook and hear Jungkook so badly, even if it was just through the computer screen it was better than nothing. Jimin remembered the last time he saw Jungkook on the screen, he looked so tired and drained which pained his heart. He wanted nothing but to hug and kiss Jungkook, he should've just dropped everything and went with Jungkook.
He wondered how was Jungkook doing.
The next morning, Jimin woke up surrounded by a familiar scent and the familiar warmth.
“Kookie.” Jimin called out unconsciously and tightened his hold on the person beside him.
Jungkook.. Jungkook?!
Jimin’s eyes snapped open, and moved away to stare the familiar handsome face in front of him, “Jung..Jungkook! Wait, what, how?! I must be dreaming.”
Jungkook opened one eye and flicked Jimin’s forehead, Jimin felt a sharp pain, he wasn’t dreaming. Jungkook was actually there, beside him. Jimin was actually so happy that he wanted to jump up and down on the bed, “I’m not dreaming, you are here! You are back!”
“Stop yelling, it’s so early in the morning.” Jungkook murmured.
“Sorry.” Jimin couldn’t even control his smile.
Jungkook seemed to fell in sleep again, Jimin just stared at him, fingers gently traced Jungkook’s face features. He looked more matured than five months ago and he looked thiner, Jimin wondered if he had eaten well or it was due to stress. His jaw line was sharper.
“Stop moving and let me sleep.” Jungkook said, “I came back at four in the morning for you.”
Jimin’s smile widened and he snuggled closer to Jungkook, “I miss you.”
“Me too, I could finally have a good sleep now that I have you in my arms.” Jungkook said softly and kissed Jimin’s forehead tenderly.
Jimin was about to drift into sleep when he heard Jungkook’s voice again, “Jiminie.”
“Hmm?”
“I love you.”
Jimin smiled warmly, “I love you too.”
Jungkook still didn’t find the answers that he was looking for but it didn’t matter to him that much anymore. And he was certain that as long as he had Jimin with him, it was just a matter of time for him to find the answers.