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A genius, far beyond anybody else’s capabilities, with all the power such a naturally talented mind could bring - that was how Doctor was known, and it was that clever mind that Rebecca had dedicated each breath they had left to protecting. It was a shared goal, uniting HOTFIX as much as any other task, but the desire to stand by their side went far beyond responsibility or obligation. A bond so long-standing and unbreakable could never end there.
It felt like a secret for her to know they weren’t indomitable as so many others looked up to them with starry eyes and high expectations. The genius Mindhacker, after all, seemed so far above them at times, able to do the undoable in their duties. Rebecca knew better, though she held no less respect for them, regardless of how much of them she knew.
Doctor was, after all, human, and, in that vein, fragile beyond their skill, irreplaceably so. The most recent BUG incident was a reminder of that. How easily they could be lost, and how easily they could be broken, in more ways than one. After all, her eye was keen to notice when something worrying had appeared within others, and with Doctor, it was especially easy, as a Captain, friend and whatever else their bond could be called, for them to know when something was off. They weren’t oblivious to what seeing horrors like the latest incident for the first time could do to somebody, after all, and they could see it well within them.
“Doctor? It’s me,” they called, knocking at their door. There was no response, not even the faintest sound of them stirring. Seconds went by before they realised what they’d forgotten, and they clarified, with another knock, “Rebecca. Captain of the Security Force.”
Still, there was nothing to greet the sound but the quiet that settled in its absence.
“Doctor,” they repeated, taking the door’s handle and pressing it down until they could peer into the flower-lined room. They almost expected it to be empty, but, dark suit standing out enough to immediately grab their eye, Doctor sat at their desk. Their computer was on, but hardly seemed to be holding their attention. Instead, they only fidgeted with another flower, gloved hands hesitating as they brushed against the white petals before setting the flower head in the palm of their hand. One more time, Rebecca knocked, and this time, Doctor spared them a glance, sitting up straight as they stepped further into the room.
“I do hope I’m not disturbing you, Doctor. I know it’s rare for you to have this much time to yourself,” Rebecca noted.
Doctor didn’t say anything, but waved off the notion with a shake of their head, turning towards them to give them more of their attention.
“...It’s odd, isn’t it? I haven’t heard much of FORMAT today, either. I can hardly remember the last time she’s been quiet for so long,” Rebecca commented, looking up to where they could imagine her voice calling from at any moment. It didn’t.
Doctor got somewhat fidgety at that, the pause they took and the way their hands tensed up before they started to tap a finger against the back of their other hand in subtle anxiety speaking more for them than any words they held back could. It didn’t last long, but she knew them well enough to get the message.
“Doctor, whatever happened yesterday, and if this is related… I won’t pry, I assure you. If you choose to leave the matter, I trust that you have your reasons,” Rebecca told them. As Doctor slowly nodded, she continued, “But I do hope you know you can trust me if you ever change your mind. As captain, and as your friend.”
Doctor remained quiet, averting their gaze from Rebecca’s own. It bothered her, but they did their best to brush it aside. No prying, as hard as it was to step back.
“Now, it’s another pleasant day out. Surely as wonderful as yesterday. Perhaps I could show you where I found those flowers you have with you now,” Rebecca proposed, feeling her hopes rise higher than what was sure to be their answer.
“No, Captain. I’m sure FORMAT would prefer to know where I am, and my aid could always be needed here,” Doctor explained, finally speaking up. It was certainly disappointing, but far from surprising. It was a familiar explanation, after all.
“I see. Then I could at least take you for a short walk, just through the facility. Perhaps there’s a part of the building you haven’t seen in a while?” Rebecca offered.
“...No, Captain,” Doctor repeated with some hesitance, turning more towards the computer, gaze averted. Their gloved hand once more reached out, settling on the stem of what was sure to be one of the flowers Rebecca had given them before. Looking back up, they simply told them, “There’s still work to be done.”
“I see,” Rebecca sighed, finally feeling herself relent. “Then I’ll leave you to it, if you wish.”
They stepped towards the exit, looking back at Doctor. Doctor only watched quietly, almost curiously.
“I do mean it when I say it’s a pleasant day, even within the facility itself,” Rebecca clarified, placing a hand on the door’s edge. Doctor hardly reacted. Holding in a sigh, they told them, “If you change your mind, you can always find me.”
With no parting words from Doctor, Rebecca stepped out and closed the door.
Somehow, Rebecca didn’t see Doctor again that day. Perhaps it wasn’t so surprising - a lack of FORMAT seemed to correlate with their absence easily, though usually there wasn’t a day without both. Still, as light stopped seeping in through the entrance, it grew concerning.
While past the hours of HOTFIX’s usual operations, she wouldn’t call it late enough to interfere with her own rest when she knocked on Doctor’s door once more, gentler than before, holding onto what remained of her own meal in the same hand. She waited, sure to keep the tall glass of water she held onto with her other hand steady, sure to not displace the delicate daisies placed in it.
With no response, Rebecca stepped inside once more, careful not to let the flickering lights of the general facility overtake the barely moonlit dark of Doctor’s quarters. After all, while their sleeping quarters weren’t quite reached by the light, just around the corner in their office, it was still nonetheless visible, and it was important not to take the slightest risk. A brilliant mind needed rest, regardless of how much they seemed to know it themself.
Some part of her regretted the choice to bring her armor, though she’d hardly ever catch herself inside the facility without it. She’d stepped foot in their room before, many times over many years, all with warm acceptance, so her presence hardly felt wrong, but she certainly walked with more care than usual, faint noises from Doctor helping to guide her away from them and towards the nearest window.
The windows where Doctor rested tended to take security and privacy more in mind than others, making it a hard reach, but certainly doable, even with Rebecca’s shoulder plates weighing her arms down. It also meant a distinct lack of flowers on the windowsill, save for some seemingly there for the sole purpose of adding some colour. The single flower resting there almost seemed lonely. She made sure the daisies she’d brought would be there to sit alongside it.
That, by all technicality, concluded what Rebecca had to do there. Their remaining meal had been intended for Doctor, of course, but there was hardly a receiver for that offering.
Still, it was certainly odd for their sleep to seem so restless. Not that Rebecca was especially familiar with their resting habits, only having occasional, distant moments reaching back years to turn to, but the occasional snores they’d heard from them before hardly compared to the sounds of their quick, unsteady breaths and barely audible whimpers as they shuffled about unconsciously under the covers they had practically cocooned themself within.
Quiet as she could manage, Rebecca moved to their side, sure to set aside what they’d brought for them, leaving it within their reach. They reached a hand out towards them, but paused before it could rest upon them, and for a moment, they simply stood there, looming over them. Eventually, keeping their voice soft yet no less driven with duty than usual, they called, “Doctor?”
Of course, they hardly reacted, and Rebecca moved to take a seat on the edge of their bed, watching intently. It wouldn’t be an unfamiliar sight with anybody else, though thankfully not in some time. BUG incidents, especially of a scale able to take lives of more than just the holder, were events that could easily burn themselves into the minds of anybody but the most steeled, and Doctor was hardly that. In others during her days fighting BUGs on the frontlines and in what she knew as she stained her own hands, there were many more familiar with the sights who suffered easily from them. For her own warnings of not letting those memories linger, to not let the faces of those who fell burn into their mind, she knew well that it was hardly ever that simple.
That was with whatever they'd seen in other's minds set aside. They liked to imagine there was peace in it, that only flowers and success lingered on their mind after each hack, but there was no way to see the same scenery.
“Doctor,” she repeated, with no expectation for a reaction. After all, it wasn’t the sort of issue she could truly protect them from, as much as the thought pained her. Perhaps she could have protected them better in the past, and shielded them from everything which haunted them now, but that failure was one of the past. All they could do now was stay by their side, with all the helplessness that conclusion brought.
So, they remained, right at their side, right where they belonged. It didn’t feel like enough. Still, there was nothing but time to let pass. They remembered when what they'd seen carved into their own thoughts at night, after all, and while their own training certainly made their own reactions to the odd stray noise waking them stronger, they still refrained from disturbing them. Doctor’s hand, gloved even in sleep, poked out from under the covers, and Rebecca slid their own towards it until they were just barely apart.
It was only a matter of time before their heavy breaths calmed and Doctor grew quiet. That, at least, reassured Rebecca, the concerns she couldn’t confront herself fading before her. She couldn’t help but continue to watch over them, and before the thought to leave could even enter her mind, Doctor’s hand began to feel around the bed, soon finding its way right against her. She made sure to adjust her arm, keeping her cold armour away. For a moment, when she looked over, she could see Doctor looking back with a surprised gaze before they calmed and closed their eyes again.
“Doctor?” Rebecca called once more, and, with half-open, clearly tired eyes, their attention returned to them. Slumping down to look at them better, they told them, “I apologise for intruding.”
Doctor hardly seemed bothered, gaze soft as they simply watched them. Their hand held onto theirs tighter, Rebecca noted, if only from the revelation of it being there setting in. They were sure to return the gesture, holding on gently.
“I brought you something to eat, if you haven’t already,” she told them, glancing to where she placed what she brought. It was unlikely that Doctor would have any need for it, of course, seeming to have planned out every meal long before Rebecca could worry over them, but, if their meticulous planning from well before ever failed them, she could hardly leave them alone.
Of course, it only mattered so much, with how little mind Doctor seemed to give the matter, only looking away for a moment before their eyes began to close again and they returned to hiding their face under the blankets. Rebecca hardly minded, watching quietly, expecting their hand to slip away. It never did.
Rebecca’s concern didn’t fade.
“...Doctor, if you’ve refrained from telling me anything, I won’t insist you do. I know what it’s like, to have somebody attempt to divert your path, and if you take your own path, and there’s parts you wish to keep from me, I won’t ask you to say a word. Not unless you wish,” Rebecca told them, their thumb brushing the side of their hand.
Doctor took in a breath, just sharply enough to be notable.
“Still, if you ever wish to confide in me, about anything at all, I hope I have your trust. However you change, you don't need to feel alone on your path. Although, I suppose FORMAT would make truly being alone rather difficult within the facility,” Rebecca continued, watching Doctor closely.
Doctor breathed out slowly, shifting themself more in Rebecca’s direction. Under the covers, their arms brushed against the metal on hers in a half-embrace. She nearly pulled away, to keep them from their armour’s chill, but, with no desire of the Doctor’s own to separate, she paused and remained.
“And if you ever need someone to shoulder your troubles, or to simply listen, I’ll be there for you,” Rebecca assured, reaching out their free hand to place it on their side. “Even a genius Mindhacker needs support, after all.”
They couldn’t be entirely sure their words reached them, of course, as they returned to rest comfortably, but they could only hope, as they moved a little closer until they were pressed against Rebecca, that they understood, if or not from their own words.
Eventually, though, they were near sure that they’d drifted off once more, only a lack of the snores they’d heard from them before as evidence against it. They lightly stroked their back, and when it didn’t earn much of a reaction, they simply gave them a light pat on the back before slipping away. As soon as their hand had left theirs, they couldn’t help but miss their warmth.
Before they stood up, their gaze wandered upwards once more, to where their flowers stood. Only then did Rebecca remember.
“It was another pleasant day out. If you’d seen it, I’m sure even you might’ve forgotten why you stay inside at all,” she informed the presumably unhearing Doctor. Hardly able to even see the moonlight now, it was hard to imagine they’d gotten to experience much of the day gone past save for what would have poured into their office during the day. “I know you don't pay the most mind to wildflowers like these, Doctor, but I found you some daisies while I was outside. I hope they help to brighten up your room.”
Rebecca got to their feet, hand pushing down on the mattress to help them up, glancing towards them one more time to be sure they hadn't been disturbed. It was almost amusing how peacefully they seemed to have returned to rest in contrast. If it would remain that way was unanswered, but Rebecca could hardly stay the night to know.
There were words left unsaid. Rebecca knew it, feeling them all weigh on their mind. There was, of course, a way to help that feeling fade, but there wasn’t a way to speak their thoughts into words that did them justice. However, in the quiet of night, likely without a word reaching their recipient, words began to flow.
“...I’m sorry, for not protecting you well enough when it mattered, or if I’ve tried to shield you from change. But, I assure you, for as long as I can stand by your side, I’ll continue to protect you. As the HOTFIX Captain, as a friend…” they told them. As so much more , rang true in their mind, but no word could truly encapsulate what they were to them, summarising decades of irreplaceable connection. “And, wherever your path leads, whoever you become… I look forward to seeing it. I truly do.”
Some part of her hoped that her words were able to reach them, as unbefitting as they felt for every little thing she truly felt.
“Sleep well, Doctor,” Rebecca told them in departure. Even if small, for somebody so unmistakably human yet so seemingly dismissive of that fact, it was a sincere wish.
They shut the door as they exited, slow and careful not to make a sound. They were sure as before to not let the lights outside reach them, keeping the facility’s reach from them if only in rest.
They said their goodbye to the day’s Doctor as they stepped away, surprised to hear the faint sound of the door’s locking activating. Their departure was on the reluctant side, but they could feel themself start to tire. They'd be back at the facility early the next day, and they knew just how hypocritical they’d be if they disregarded their own rest.
Besides, Rebecca knew they'd see them again. Whether they wished to confide in them, to explain the troubles they’d seen from them that night, or if they'd simply move on with their day as usual. Whether they’d meet in the duty of the debug room or in the comfort of their office. If they'd be reuniting with the same Doctor they’d left.
It hardly mattered, ultimately, because the next day looked the same. They’d see Doctor again, without falter or fail. Even if they’d found a way to change overnight, they knew in their heart that they’d be right there to protect them.
After all, Rebecca had long since devoted themself to them, and, as long as they could, they'd stay exactly where they belonged - right by their side, as Captain, as a friend and as the one who knew them best.