Work Text:
Rakel glided into the parlor and seated herself beside her husband. He sat reading a parchment, tears glistening in his eyes. She was unsure whether the tears were from the information he read or the funeral they had just attended. Today had been yet another in a long parade of funerals for friends they both counted dear. It was difficult not to be sorrowful after losing so many. “What are you reading, Love?”
Farrin handed the paper to her. “Halvor’s son gave it to me after the funeral.”
“You don’t mind if I read it?”
“No. I think he would have wanted you to read it.”
Rakel focused on the parchment that already had a few tear stains though she did not know if they were from Halvor or her husband.
To My Friend:
There are some things I have needed to say for a long time, but circumstance and propriety have made it difficult to say them. You’ll have to excuse an old man’s rambles because I refuse to go to my final resting place without saying these things that my friend needs to hear.
Farrin, when I first met you, you were closed, nearly dead inside, and—although you hid it well—terrified. Not of your enemy. No. We could never frighten you. You were terrified of what you thought you had become. Even after the war ended, even after the princess awoke, even after the two of you married, you hid, seeing nothing in yourself worth bringing into the light.
But I began to see glimpses of the man underneath the fear as we kept each other sharp with our practices. (Something I deeply regret not being able to continue, but at sixty or seventy years old, I was not able to keep up with a thirty year old. By the way, don’t think I didn’t notice that you took it easy on me for the last few years of our sparring, even if my pride wouldn’t allow me to admit it.)
Thinking back on it now, I think the turning point was the day that the Sunshiners first arrived in Verglas. You became their leader, their example, their mentor, and in convincing them that they were worthy of a second chance, you began to convince yourself. I was glad to see your beginning to grow into your role as a leader of the mages, as an advisor to King Steinar and your wife, and as a family man and friend.
Occasionally, through the years, however, I’ve seen that confidence slip. I’ve seen the “Shadow Man” that Phile often called you reemerge and try to swallow you, but you’ve battled through it. Don’t ever let Shadow Man become your reality, Farrin. Don’t let anyone tell you that your past defines you. Don’t let anyone make you out to be less than you are.
Even as your staunchest supporters are forced to leave you behind, we leave behind us people who have been raised believing in the values we fought for so long ago. You already have some. Princess Helene would politically crush anyone who disparaged either you or Rakel, though she would be so gentle about it they’d hardly realize it was happening until after it was done. She’s got fire under that soft-spoken exterior.
The elves are so fond of you and Rakel that they put a statue of her in their Forest. And don’t you dare say that they are only fond of Rakel. I happen to know that Prince Aranor makes time in his schedule specifically for you each time you visit. Before he died, Ragnar told me that Aranor enjoys sparring with you. Your magic feels quite different from elf magic, apparently.
I digress. The children and grandchildren of the mages and many of the families of the regular soldiers are thorough-going supporters of the Snow Queen, the mages, and you. And of course now you have the Zancaran royalty firmly in your camp.
I know it’s going to be difficult for you and Rakel as you live through the sorrow of losing loved ones. I’m sorry. I’m glad you’ll have each other. But selfishly, I’m comforted to know that the two of you will be here to protect what we’ve tried to build.
Farrin, promise me that the next time someone makes you think you’re unworthy, you’ll remember my words. You are one of the finest, most upstanding men I’ve ever known. I count it an honor to call you friend.
Henrik Halvor
When Rakel finished reading, the room had chilled and frozen tears sparkled on her cheeks. “He was a good man.”
Farrin sighed, wrapping an arm around his wife and snuggling her close to his side. “I will miss him.”
“So will I. I will miss all of them.”