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There is a transfer student from Korea .
That was what Sakuya had been hearing the past few days. On his way to school, during lessons, during breaks, on his way home from school. Honestly, Sakuya was sick of hearing about this Korean transfer student.
"Don't talk to me about that Korean transfer student." Sakuya said unceremoniously when Ryo, his best friend, sat beside him.
Ryo giggled. He knew his best friend was curious, he was just shy about it, “I was just about to say that the Korean transfer student is here.”
Sakuya looked at Ryo with wide eyes.
They were currently at the school’s indoor basketball court. Ryo had basketball club practice today and Sakuya stayed behind so they could walk home together.
The Korean transfer student walked inside the building. He was wearing his school uniform instead of a basketball uniform like Ryo did. His friend then ran to the court and greeted the Korean transfer student. He smiled and chatted with Ryo and other students.
Sakuya's first impression of the Korean transfer student was: Tall. The other students looked tiny beside him. He looked like a tall grass in a meadow
Sakuya could tell he was forced to be here from the way he kept scratching his neck and looking clueless when the other student explained the rules. He also seemed a bit awkward when he dribbled the ball and passed it to someone on his team. Unlike Ryo, who was relaxed and confident in his movement, it was obvious he was an amateur.
Sakuya giggled. Is it because he's tall so everyone thinks he’d be good at playing basketball? He mused.
Later when they walked home, Ryo talked about the Korean transfer student.
His name was Kim Daeyoung. But he said it was okay to call him Daeng or Den-kun. The reason he moved to Japan in his last year of high school was because of his father’s job.
Ryo said that he didn't know how to play basketball but his classmates thought it would be fun to try (apparently he was 185cm tall, Ryo added) and he agreed.
Ryo said he was friendly and laughed a lot. Sakuya noticed that, too. Even during the game, the Korean transfer student was laughing so hard he fell to his knees in the middle of the court. Sakuya thought it was funny.
When Ryo asked Sakuya what he thought about Daeyoung, he just repeated what he said to him earlier, “don't talk to me about that Korean transfer student.”
For some unknown reason, Sakuya kept seeing Daeyoung a lot lately. It wasn’t like he was looking for him, but somehow he was just there . Sakuya saw him at the basketball court, at the teacher’s office, in the hallways, even in the library.
Sakuya brought up the topic about him seeing Daeyoung frequently when he was playing futsal with Ryo during lunch break.
“It’s just your imagination,” Ryo answered after thinking for 3 seconds. He slapped Sakuya’s back all of a sudden and ran away. Sakuya chased him around the soccer field.
Sakuya saw something long and slender in his peripheral vision. He stopped running immediately to confirm what he saw.
“Ryo!” Sakuya called, still not looking at his friend. Ryo stopped running and looked at what Sakuya was so focused on; it was Daeyoung exiting the school building with his friend.
“See? He’s everywhere!” Sakuya exclaimed, “he’s in the cafetaria, in the basketball court, in the teacher’s office, and now he’s here!” He looked like he just witnessed a paranormal activity and was trying to convince Ryo it was real.
Ryo looked at Sakuya and then at Daeyoung who was now out of their sight, “I think you just started to pay attention to him. So it’s not him who was everywhere but rather it's you who noticed him more,” Ryo finished his statement with a shrug.
Sakuya’s round eyes just got rounder, “how could you not notice him when he’s like two meters tall??”
“He’s 185 centimeters.”
“He’s literally a tree.”
“That’s right. You’d never notice how many trees are around you until you start paying attention to them.”
Sakuya was flabbergasted. He looked around and…he never knew there were so many trees in the school grounds. Still, he was about to express his disagreement to Ryo’s observation until he saw a smirk on his friend’s face.
Was Ryo just messing with him?
Sakuya’s face morphed into multiple different emotions in a span of 1 second.
Ryo ran away cackling before Sakuya could say or do anything.
The talk about The Korean Transfer Student had died down and Daeyoung had become a regular high school student.
Sakuya thought that was not true, though. Nothing about Daeyoung was regular.
First of all, he was tall. Sakuya had been thinking of him as a tree in his head. And for someone that tall, he didn’t look intimidating. He was big, but not a “brick house” kind of big but rather a “giant teddy bear” kind of big.
Sakuya also noticed that Daeyoung was loud. His voice, his laugh, his reaction. His presence itself was loud. One couldn’t miss him even if they wanted to.
Many students and teachers had said good things about him. He studies well. He helped me do my math homework. He laughs at everything I say! Those were some of the things Sakuya’d heard in passing.
The only “bad” thing about Daeyoung was he sometimes would fall asleep during lessons. He would apologize to the teacher and promised to not do it again, but he still did it again the next day.
And from what Sakuya’d gathered (He wasn’t stalking, he was just very observant (Damn you, Ryo)), Daeyoung was also very friendly. In the few months since he transferred here, he befriended almost everyone in school. He could strike up a conversation with anyone and BAM! they were friends.
Another thing about Daeyoung that intrigued Sakuya was that he smelled good. Like really good. He knew he wasn't the best person to be talking about scents because he liked the smell of tires and gunpowder, but even Ryo agreed with him.
The reason for that statement was because of that one time Sakuya was running from the cafetaria after snatching the last yakisoba bread, he smelled an unbelievably good scent. He’d stopped in his tracks and turned around to see Daeyoung standing in the cafetaria’s doorway while looking at the yakisoba bread in Sakuya’s hand with sad eyes. He was literally making :( face.
He looked like a kicked puppy. Unbelievable.
Sakuya stepped closer to confirm the source of that scent.
It smelled like fabric softener, clean and sweet, kinda fruity, like if someone squeezed peaches and berries in his face.
Sakuya ended up giving his precious yakisoba bread to Daeyoung. He didn't even know why. But seeing Daeyoung's face lit up, smiling widely revealing his snaggletooth (Sakuya didn't even know he had one) suddenly he didn't mind at all. He couldn't resist cute things after all.
After he gave his bread, Sakuya took off without saying a word.
After the yakisoba bread incident. Sakuya tried so hard to avoid daeyoung.
Keyword: tried.
This time, instead of randomly appearing in his peripheral vision, Daeyoung was actively looking for Sakuya. It was like they were playing a game of hide and seek and Daeyoung was ‘it’ forever.
Daeyoung would ask around, went to Sakuya’s class, even went to his soccer practice.
Kim Daeyoung was proven to be very ambitious. Or, in Sakuya's opinion, he was stubborn.
It got to the point that Sakuya didn't even go to the cafetaria to get his favorite yakisoba bread in fear of meeting Daeyoung.
“I have enough of this,” Ryo sighed.
“What?” Sakuya snapped. He was inhaling his bento at record speed, which was an unusual sight because; 1. Sakuya preferred bread over rice, and 2. Sakuya ate at a snail’s pace. Ryo was both disturbed and worried for his best friend.
They were currently at the rooftop because Daeyoung was once again looking for Sakuya. He seemed to have developed a 6th sense for Daeyoung; he ran as soon as his Daeyoung Radar tingled, bringing his bento and Ryo to the rooftop with him.
“What what? Sakuya, you should just talk to Den-kun. It's frustrating me,” Ryo snapped back.
“What’s there to talk about?” Sakuya looked away from Ryo. He looked down to the field where other students were playing futsal. He saw Daeyoung wandering around at the side of the field, probably looking for him.
“Just say you have a crush on him,” Ryo said with ease.
Sakuya whipped his head so fast that Ryo jumped.
“Are you crazy?? Do you think that would solve this problem? What if he thought I was crazy? What if he remembers me as the first year who had a one-sided crush on him forever? What if…”
“Sakuya!” Ryo cried out.
Sakuya snapped his mouth shut. His face turned crimson.
Ryo needed to calm his friend down before he exploded, but he couldn't hold it anymore, he let out a peal of laughter.
“Sakuya, you actually have a crush on Den-kun?” Ryo was still in disbelief. He was half-joking earlier, he didn’t expect this reaction.
“Who told you that?” Sakuya pouted.
You said it yourself, dummy. Ryo wanted to say that but he chose to be a good friend this time and listened to Sakuya ramble about Daeyoung.
One sunny Tuesday, the teachers decided to have an emergency meeting after lunch and let the students have self-study time. Ryo hollered out of happiness. The rest of his classmates were shoving their books in their bags, some actually studied, some already out of the class.
Sakuya’s Daeyoung Radar tingled all of a sudden. He decided to go outside alone before Daeyoung caught him.
Sakuya looked out the window to the soccer field. He suddenly wanted to play futsal but he thought it would be too hot to play outside in the ridiculously hot summer weather, so he walked through the long hallways to the other side of the building to the sports hall.
Once he reached his destination, he opened the door and immediately took a few steps back.
Daeyoung was standing in the doorway holding the door open.
Sakuya was too startled to do anything and just stared. He had to look up to meet Daeyoung in the eye, something he rarely did as he was friends with Ryo.
“You want to come in? We are playing futsal,” Daeyoung said, his eyes full of hope.
Sakuya peeked inside, some students were already playing futsal while some sat in the benches.
Sakuya nodded, and it earned a smile from Daeyoung. It was like he was enchanted; whatever Daeyoung wanted, Sakuya granted.
Daeyoung walked ahead of Sakuya. He realized late that they were walking to the benches instead of the court.
Sakuya was doomed. He had to talk with Daeyoung!
“You’re Sakuya right? Ryo’s friend?” Daeyoung opened the conversation when they were seated.
“Yes,” Sakuya murmured. He tended to speak softly or not speak at all when nervous.
“I’m Daeyoung. You can call me Daeng. Nice to finally meet you!” Daeyoung reached his hand out for Sakuya to shake.
I know, Sakuya wanted to answer, but instead, he just shook the offered hand timidly.
Daeyoung’s warm hand woke him up. He was in a trance this whole time, he didn’t think all of this was really happening. Sakuya let go of Daeyoung’s hand right away. Too late, Daeyoung’s handprint was molded into Sakuya’s bones and he would remember the shape of his hand for the rest of his life.
Sakuya was lowkey freaking out, but still, they watched other students play futsal quietly. At least Sakuya was; he was sitting with his back straight, stretching and clenching his right hand while Daeyoung was cheering loudly by his side. He didn’t even know which team he was cheering for. Seemed like he cheered for anyone who got close to the goal.
Sakuya was watching the game with something else plaguing his mind. There was something wrong with his Radar. His Daeyoung Radar was supposed to help him avoid Daeyoung, not lead him to Daeyoung. He continued watching the game mindlessly. When some student got close to the goal and actually scored, everyone, including Daeyoung, cheered.
Sakuya gasped.
The realization just hit him; his Daeyoung Radar was just telling him where Daeyoung was, the decision whether to avoid or seek him out was on him. So did he go all the way to the sports hall because he actually wanted to see Daeyoung? Preposterous, absurd, ridiculous.
“You okay?” Daeyoung looked at Sakuya in concern. He didn’t realize he’d been staring aimlessly for too long.
“I’m fine,” Sakuya got up from his seat, he needed to…fix his radar, or something.
“Wait!” Daeyoung grabbed Sakuya’s wrist, and let it go a moment later. “I just wanted to thank you for the bread the other day. I’ve been looking for you for weeks, but you’re very hard to find, so I’m glad I got to meet you today,” Daeyoung finished his speech with a smile.
“It’s nothing. You looked like a kicked puppy, I couldn’t help it.” Sakuya said while looking at his own wrist, touching it.
“What?”
“Nothing!” Sakuya looked up to see Daeyoung’s confused face. He suddenly had the urge to tease him. “As a senior, giving the last yakisoba bread to his junior is nothing,” he added.
“But I’m older than you?” There was a genuine frown on Daeyoung’s face. He tilted his head in confusion, a behavior mainly done by puppies, Sakuya thought.
“But I’ve been a student here longer than you do,” Sakuya responded.
Sakuya didn’t understand where he got the confidence to talk all this nonsense to Daeyoung from, but he would take advantage of it before it ran out.
Daeyoung laughed out loud. Sakuya laughed too. This situation was so absurd.
Daeyoung’s big laugh echoed in the court. Sakuya liked how Daeyoung laughed freely without a care in the world.
Sakuya was openly staring at Daeyoung’s face, I made Daeyoung laugh! He cheered secretly.
Not long after that, Sakuya and Ryo started hanging out with Daeyoung.
The three of them would hang out after school, going to places Daeyoung never visited before; basically giving him a tour around the city. They also would teach Daeyoung Japanese since he was still learning.
When teaching Daeyoung Japanese, Sakuya realized he didn’t like the way Daeyoung talked. What was this guy? Why was he talking in pout? And with that sweet voice? Was all 185 cm of him actually made out of a bunch of cotton candy stuffed in a school uniform? Sakuya wanted to bite him.
Ryo was a bit confused with this development but was happy for his friend. And as a “good friend,” Ryo would sometimes bail out of their plan to hang out so Sakuya could be alone with Daeyoung.
Sakuya was conflicted between being grateful for how thoughtful Ryo was or wanting to kiss his friend with his fist. Especially that time when they were supposed to watch a horror movie that Ryo recommended, but only Sakuya and Daeyoung ended up watching it because Ryo had to go with his sister to an idol concert (lies).
Sakuya was scared of horror stuff and Daeyoung, despite being a little bit better at handling scary stuff, was easily startled.
For the whole duration of the movie, Sakuya would scream in terror and Daeyoung would fly out of his seat because of jumpscares. 0 out of 10 experience for scaredy-cat Sakuya, but he’d give an extra 10 points because it was with Daeyoung.
Through hanging out with Daeyoung, Sakuya found out how easy it was to be with him. How funny and affectionate he was. How Daeyoung took care of Sakuya like he would a younger brother; Daeyoung bought him food, played futsal with him, laughed at his jokes, poked his cheeks, hugged him, patted his head with affection.
Sakuya hated all of it.
He wanted Daeyoung to stop seeing him as a baby and start acknowledging him as a potential lover. If this continued, he could not move past the younger brother zone.
Sakuya whined at Ryo about Daeyoung when they were playing games in Ryo's bedroom.
“He’s so attentive, but a bit oblivious sometimes. How does that make sense?” Sakuya wondered outloud.
“Den-kun will never understand unless you say you like him to his face, just kiss him next time,” Ryo said, blunt as ever. His eyes focused on the game on his TV.
Sakuya was unfazed, he was even considering actually doing it. His brain already simulating at least 15 different scenarios that all ended up in Sakuya embarrassing himself.
Sakuya suddenly thought of something better.
He shot up from Ryo’s bed, grabbed his belongings, and bid him farewell.
Sakuya thought of his parents’ story of when they were younger where they would give each other hand-made gifts as a romantic gesture. Inspired by that story, Sakuya wanted to give Daeyoung something special, something memorable and he knew just the perfect gift for that.
He went to a local market near his house where they sold beads and charms for accessories. He decided to do this himself because it would be embarrassing if Ryo were to see him having a mental breakdown over what gift he should pick for his crush.
Sakuya ended up picking a clover charm and a makkurokurosuke charm. He would make a keyring for Daeyoung using those charms.
He especially picked a four-leaf clover because he already associated Daeyoung with the color green and he hoped it would bring Daeyoung good luck. As for the makkurokurosuke, it reminded him of Daeyoung’s frightened expression when he was watching a horror movie.
Sakuya learned how to make keyrings and earrings from his parents. They used to make earrings for each other and then they taught Sakuya how to make something that they loved. Sakuya cherished that experience and he came to love it, too.
Just thinking about giving a hand-made gift to his crush made Sakuya giddy. He hoped his feelings would be delivered through it.
When Sakuya gave the keyring to Daeyoung and explained its meaning, Daeyoung looked amused. He kept exclaiming ‘Whoa! Wow! It’s so cute!’ while touching and holding it over his head to see it clearly.
Sakuya stole glances at Daeyoung’s face. Cute , Sakuya smiled to himself.
“Sakuya. Thank you,” Daeyoung smiled sweetly.
Ah, this is really the right gift , Sakuya thought. He didn’t know what Daeyoung was actually thinking, but Sakuya could tell he liked his gift when he saw Daeyoung put the keyring on his school bag the next day.
After receiving a good reaction to his gift, Sakuya started to step up his game.
Sakuya would spend more time with Daeyoung. They still did what they usually do, but just the two of them. Ryo said it was like they were going on dates. Sakuya declined with a red face.
When Sakuya was with Daeyoung, he always felt pleasant and comfortable. Daeyoung loved telling stories. He would talk about everything and anything and Sakuya enjoyed listening to him. Especially when he talked with a low voice, his deep voice always captivated Sakuya.
Daeyoung also always had something nice to say. He would compliment Sakuya’s new earrings and his growing collection of keyrings. He often say how cute Sakuya was, but when Sakuya replied Daeyoung’s Why are you so cute? with Why are you so handsome? He was rendered speechless.
Daeyoung did that thing when he was embarrassed; scratching his neck and laughing nervously. Sakuya giggled, he again and again thought Daeyoung was really cute.
One weekend, Sakuya and Daeyoung were playing a kart racing game at Ryo’s. Daeyoung and Ryo sat on the floor playing Mario Kart while Sakuya sat behind Daeyoung on the bed.
This close, Sakuya smelled that unbelievably good scent again. Not that Sakuya smelled bad or anything, it was just that Daeyoung’s scent was somehow more appealing.
Sakuya then put his hand around Daeyoung’s shoulders from behind.
Sakuya didn’t think much of it before hugging Daeyoung since he was an affectionate person who didn’t mind skinship. But it was never Sakuya who initiated it.
Daeyoung was so surprised his kart ran into a wall and ended up losing to Ryo.
Ryo hollered and laughed at Daeyoung. Sakuya tightened his hug and laughed along with his friend. Daeyoung just smiled bashfully while holding Sakuya’s arm.
Daeyoung said he wanted to visit a festival before final exams. So Sakuya, Ryo, Daeyoung, and some other friends went to the festival. They ate snacks, played festival games, and watched performances.
They got separated when looking for a place to watch the fireworks show, so it was just him and Daeyoung alone. They didn’t want to miss out as it was the highlight of the festival, so they looked for the best spot to watch without the others.
Sakuya and Daeyoung finally found a perfect spot to watch the fireworks near the hills. When the show started, the sounds startled Daeyoung so bad he jumped. They both laughed so hard that Daeyoung had to hold onto Sakuya for support. A moment later they focused back on the sky where fireworks sparkled, bringing lights and colors in the dark night.
Daeyoung looked at the sky in wonder, a smile never leaving his handsome face.
They stood so close their shoulders were touching. Daeyoung would glance at Sakuya a few times and every time he did, he made eye-contact with Sakuya because he just stared at Daeyoung’s face the whole time.
Fireworks were pouring down vibrant colors in this bleak world but Sakuya preferred to look at the reflections of it in Daeyoung’s eyes.
If Sakuya was a bit more brave he would’ve kissed him.
Ryo asked Sakuya if he regretted his decision of not doing anything during the festival. Sakuya shrugged and said that he didn’t.
“Time is precious, and I never regret the time I spent with the people I love.”
Their dynamics changed after the festival. The festival made Sakuya realize he didn’t mind that Daeyoung wouldn’t reciprocate his feelings. He already made precious memories with him and he would remember this feeling for the rest of his life, even if it hurt.
Sakuya just wished he was given more time.
Daeyoung couldn’t spend as much time with him as he used to because he had to graduate soon and prepare for the university entrance exam. Sakuya was also busy preparing for final exams.
Sakuya thought it was the perfect opportunity to finally let go of his growing crush.
Graduation day was in March. Cherry blossoms had bloomed creating a scenery that Sakuya had never gotten tired of seeing, it always lifted his mood up. But this time…he didn’t know how to feel.
Sakuya was standing outside the school building. Looking around at everything and nothing at all. Fidgeting with a box he held tightly in his hand, a graduation gift for Daeyoung, while he waited for him to congratulate him on his graduation.
He heard Daeyoung first before he saw him. He was laughing and chatting with his friends before his eyes landed on Sakuya.
As Daeyoung was walking towards him, Sakuya looked at his uniform and his heart sank.
The second button of his uniform was missing.
Sakuya never thought Daeyoung would know about that tradition.
He wondered who he gave it to. Was it his classmate? Did he have a crush that Sakuya wasn’t aware of? Or did he give it to whoever asked for it without knowing its meaning?
He felt his heart strings getting taut.
Sakuya sighed. It was just a button. It didn’t matter to Sakuya anyway.
Sakuya put on his best smile and congratulated him. He gave the box to Daeyoung. Another hand-made gift, a beaded necklace in the color of the night sky with a silver star charm in the middle, representing a falling star.
Sakuya told Daeyoung that sometimes he saw him praying before doing something important and he wanted all of his wishes and prayers to come true, so Sakuya made a personal falling star for him.
Daeyoung hugged Sakuya and thanked him. Sakuya caught a glimpse of Daeyoung’s eyes, they were sparkly. Was he crying? But when he faced Sakuya again, his eyes weren’t wet anymore.
He put on the necklace. It looked really good on his long neck, Sakuya thought.
Daeyoung touched the star charm and closed his eyes for a moment.
When Daeyoung opened his eyes, he looked resolved, “Sakuya, I have something to tell you,” he said in a low voice.
Sakuya’s heart started beating faster. It was like that time in the sports hall again when he didn’t know it was real or not.
“I…I have to go back to Korea.”
“Oh.”
“I’ll go to a university in Korea and live with my brother, and I…”
Sakuya’s heart hammered in his chest, making it hard to breathe. He never expected a goodbye like this.
He was having a hard time processing all of this feelings knotted in his chest. Surely, there was a limit of how many heartbreaks someone could take in a day, right?
“And, Sakuya, I want you to have this,” Daeyoung held Sakuya’s open hand and put a button with their school’s insignia on it.
Sakuya looked at it in disbelief. He was silent for a long time. It felt like his chest was about to burst.
Daeyoung started fidgeting, “umm is this not right? My friend told me to give the second button to someone I like and it’s like a tradition, or something like that, so I – Do you not want it?” He looked panicked.
“Cute.”
“What?”
“I said I like you too.”
“Oh!” Daeyoung’s face turned crimson. He rubbed his neck and smiled shyly at Sakuya.
“I’ve realized since the festival, or maybe even way before that, that I like you. I thought I liked you because you’re cute – I mean, you are cute – but the more time I spent with you made me realize that I want to share all my days with you.
I like that you are so unapologetically you, I like the way you express yourself and how witty and sensible you are…and the way you look at me. You don’t need to say anything, but I know…I think,” he rubbed his neck again.
Sakuya’s smile grew wider by the second. It felt like Daeyoung just pulled free tangled strings in his chest too fast that he got whiplash.
Daeyoung’s confession was both bold and timid at the same time. He was such an interesting person. And even though Sakuya felt like he was supposed to be the one doing the confessing, he didn’t mind this outcome.
“I promise I will come back. So, will you please–”
“I will keep it safe,” Sakuya looked up at Jaehee. He put his hand, the one holding Daeyoung’s button, to his chest. Sakuya grinned, “And just FYI, I’ve liked you longer, you know,” he loved teasing Daeyoung regardless of the situation, it made him laugh every time.
Daeyoung raised his eyebrows and laughed, Sakuya laughed so hard he almost cried.
Sakuya never thought having a crush on a Korean transfer student would end up like this.