Work Text:
Hey, I think we should have a talk about our relationship.
Nothing is wrong with how things are going, but…I think we do need to address the elephant in the room.
Well, more like the 6 foot tall cutout in the room.
No, I’m not saying that you can’t have it, I’m more concerned with what it represents in our relationship and also in how you perceive me. Last night, when we were being intimate, you insisted on having it in the room. And then as soon as we were done, you logged into Glory to continue running the fan club guild you have for him. It just kind of seems like you aren’t really there for us in the relationship, just you.
I’m not jealous of him, I’m missing you, and it seems like you just aren’t there for us.
What?
You don’t think you’re that far removed and this shouldn’t be affecting the relationship? How can you say that after this past month?
What did you do?
Let me pull out my credit card history…ah here it is.
You spent half of my paycheck last week on scalped Excellent Era merch, claiming that it was necessary to preserve his legacy. And then when the merch got here, you put it next to the 5 other copies of that player’s merch in the shrine that takes up half our living room, claiming that the good chi from the shrine would ensure that his team would win this Season’s finals.
Oh, you’re saying he will? He hasn’t won a season in three years, what delusions do you have to be under in order to believe that your shrine will make a difference.
Ok, you know what, I’m moving away from the shrine, let’s talk about the thirty BiliBili gifts that wiped out your savings and caused you to ask me for food money.
Yeah I saw that, cause I have to watch his stream to make sure you aren’t spending ludicrous amounts of money for his monthly quota streams.
No, I don’t care if he’s in dire need, I had to work 30 more hours this week to make up for that money, because it was supposed to be for our bills, not some pro player’s extra allowance from his fans.
Hey, you don’t get to pout at that! If I’m not allowed to send superchats to my favourite streamer, you don’t get to drop thirty fireworks on his “Sleeping while logged into Glory” streams.
And don’t get me started on our day to day conversations. Every day you go on about how he would have done something like that, or how he really liked eating this. You had us travel three and a half hours by train last week to go eat the spicy noodles by the old Excellent Era building.
What’s the issue with that? Wha-I can’t eve-YOU CAN’T EAT ANYTHING WITH BLACK PEPPER IN IT WITHOUT CRYING, WHAT DO YOU MEAN? I had to apologise to the owner of the stall after you burst out crying and started swearing at him for not giving you the “right order”, even though all you said was “Give me what the old Excellent Era players had”. Even then, we almost got the police called on us, and for what? So you could feel a little closer to your favourite pro player?
Actually, you know what, I wouldn’t even be this mad, if you actually had good taste in your star pro. Zhou Zekai, Ye Xiu, Zhang Jiale, hell, I wouldn’t even be mad if you thought Han Wenqing was hotter than me, I’d agree. Screw it, let’s just narrow the pool by class. Jiang Botao, that one reserve player from Tiny Herb, they look decent and have pretty good attitudes.
BUT LIU HAO?
Don’t you look at me as if I’m speaking gibberish. You chose one of the worst looking, worst performing, and worst attitude pro players in the scene right now to be your fav, and you’re out here acting like he’s an innocent little kitten that can do no wrong. I’ve seen the QQ message logs leaked on the forums, he’s a rat bastard who doesn’t deserve his career and most certainly doesn’t deserve his vice-captain position on Wind Howl. Shit, I’d rather you be drooling over Tang Hao’s abs over his ugly, big nose face.
Yeah, yell at me all you want, you know I’m right. And don’t think I can’t see all of the fan messages and stories you write for him. Catboys? Him with Ye Xiu? I turned my eye to that stuff because I thought you were being ironic at first. But getting into a physical fight with that one Wind Howl fight because they said that Tang Hao performed better than your precious Liu Hao? I lost season stadium tickets for that, and we got a lifetime ban from any official Wind Howl events, even the simple meet and greets!
What? No no, repeat what you just said.
I can’t even believe…no wait I can believe what you’re saying, but only because I’ve had to live with this for three years! His redemption arc is coming? He’s almost there and he needs your support?
YOU HAVE A RESTRAINING ORDER FROM HIM! WHAT SUPPORT CAN YOU GIVE FROM YOUR COURT MANDATED FIVE HUNDRED METRES? TELEPATHIC VIBES?
Oh, yeah I’m sure the police simply misunderstood your intentions when you SNUCK ONTO THE PLAYER’S BUS AND HID ALL THE WAY BACK TO THEIR PLAYER DORMS. Do you know how worried I was when I couldn’t find you after you said you “went to the bathroom”? Only to get called by the police all the way in N City about you trespassing and stealing clothing from Liu Hao’s room?
What’s the big deal? What’s the bi-WE LIVE IN Q CITY, YOU WERE MISSING FOR THREE DAYS. I don’t even know how you managed to stay in that dorm for so long, but honestly, I don’t even want to know.
Huh? What happens to us now? Well, are you going to try to focus on us instead of Liu Hao? Wait, where are your eyes looking towards, it’s like they’re looking beh-
…
Really? I’m spilling my heart out, and you’re still staring at his stupid face on the cutout behind me?
Alright, I’m done, you can have the apartment, I’m moving back with my parents.