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"Taka, we need to break up."
Mitsuya was silent for a while. He didn't look surprised.
In fact, his face didn't show any emotion. He took a deep breath, then responded quietly.
"Okay."
Draken whipped his head. And there had to be something weird in his expression because Mitsuya chuckled.
"Just," Draken gulped down. "like that?"
"What do you want me to say?"
"You're not—you're not gonna ask why?" He didn't expect such a reaction, he didn't anticipate this. Draken had thought Mitsuya would be enraged, he would be shocked, he would react badly, but what was presented in front of him, was just his calm, collected Takashi Mitsuya, the usual.
"You," he fidgeted. "don't wanna know why?"
Mitsuya stared at Draken for a while, his amethyst eyes didn't deter, as if he was psychoanalyzing him. And after an excruciating silence, he opened his mouth.
"Do you want me to?"
"I—" Draken sighed. "I guess, yes. Partly I want you to."
Mitsuya shifted his body so that he fully faced Draken. "Okay, I'll bite. Why?"
Draken looked away, watching the sun go down. The golden reflected on the vastness of the blue. The memory flashed before his eyes. And with all the determination he could muster he said,
"Takemichi asked me to be his advisor. He's making a new gang, a rival gang to challenge Kantou Manji. And, I said, yes."
Mitsuya wasn't stupid.
He might come off as dense sometimes, but he was quite intuitive. When Draken asked him for a little ride this afternoon, Mitsuya knew something was up.
His boyfriend wasn't fully healed, he still suffered the pain from the gunshot wounds at random times. Of course, Mitsuya didn't let him go out, except for the short trip to the hospital for his weekly check-up, or occasional visit to the shop. He hadn't gone back to work yet, but he liked to bothersupervise Inui and remind him who was the boss. Mitsuya knew Draken wouldn't do anything stupid, so after a while, he didn't accompany him anymore.
And that was it.
Draken wasn't interested in going elsewhere. He even refused Masaway's offer to come home, reasoning that he was still bedridden. (The girls visited them instead, and they had a good laugh at how easily tricked Masaway was.)
But today was different.
Mitsuya knew it.
As if Draken was adamant about feeling bored. It was Mitsuya's day off and he actually wanted to spend it lazing around with Draken in their apartment.
It went smoothly at first, but when noon approached, Draken started acting relentlessly.
And Mitsuya knew him long enough to understand that Draken was aching to do something.
Whatever that is.
So after deciding he was having enough of Draken pacing around the house and being grumpy, Mitsuya sighed and gave in.
"Ken, do you want to go somewhere?"
It surprised no one that they ended up on the beach.
Mitsuya didn't need to ask for an elaborative answer when Draken merely responded to his offer to go out with, "Anywhere, I don't care."
The beach was his safest option and obviously, a smart pick.
It had been a while since the last time they went there. The memories of seas and sands brought back all the sweetness of the past times when they were younger and had no care for the world. The times when they believed they could do everything, and achieve anything.
Mitsuya looked at Draken and he knew what he was thinking instantly.
He thought about Tokyo Manji.
Their gang.
There were so many memories regarding Toman on this beach. Their first trip as founding members, the following trips when Toman slowly gained members, another one when they were reminiscing the early days, another one to celebrate Toman's victory, and so many more.
Just like the shrine, the beach was a special place for both Draken and Mitsuya.
Mitsuya had tons of scenarios of their short visitation to this beach.
None had even come closer to what was actually happening.
Mitsuya was aware, his relationship with Draken was not perfect, but he would say, and rather believed, their bond was strong enough, even stronger after they were dating.
It would be too presumptuous of him to imagine a future where they could further their relationship, but it was way unrealistic of him to ever think that they would break up.
Without any preamble.
Mitsuya didn't see it coming, and yet, he somehow knew, if everything ever went downhill, it would eventually come to this.
Draken's fatal flaws were that he cared too much and he was loyal at fault.
Weird, how Mitsuya didn't even try to think that any of this, of course, had to do with what had caused Draken's injury in the first place.
"What do you want me to do, Ken?" After some time, Mitsuya asked, but not really asking. "You want me to stay away from everything? After breaking up with me, will you ask me to stop following you, too? And to follow my dreams, instead? Is that what you want from me? For us to part ways, to walk on our paths separately? Turning my head and for me to pretend that I know nothing? Nothing, like I was never a part of any of this?"
Draken didn't respond. He stared at his feet, dipped in the salt water, avoiding Mitsuya's eyes.
Mitsuya sighed, half-relieved because he genuinely didn't know what to do if he happened to exchange glances with Draken at this very moment.
"Because if that's what you want me to do," he didn't know whether it was serenity or numbness that stopped his brain from thinking. Either way, it worked to help him spit out words. "I'll do it. I will do it all for you."
Draken turned his head at that, catching him off guard.
"Taka, it's not—" he started, then trailing off like he changed his mind midway, before adding very quietly. "Don't do it for my sake."
So, Draken expected him to back down on his own?
Like Mitsuya would just comply because, oh wow, he didn't realize that everything that had happened was dangerous and he should just stop before getting involved too deep?
Draken wouldn't mind throwing away everything, but he drew a line when Mitsuya did it for him?
"Then, don't push me away for my sake too," Mitsuya responded as quietly.
A rare, heavy silence befell them. It was not a strange occurrence for them to have no words to say, but this time, everything seemed so tense.
There were so many things that should have been said, that should have been vocalized, but they couldn't find the right words for them.
Mitsuya wanted nothing more for Draken to stay away from everything that might put him in danger. He wanted him to stick with his bike shop, living the life he deserved like a normal people would.
But telling Draken to stay away would be unfair.
Because that wasn't who he was.
Draken wouldn't stop unless he could bring Mikey back.
"Mikey is my friend too, Ken," Mitsuya added almost too quietly.
He knew Draken's intention was good, he wanted to help Takemichi do the impossible, bringing Mikey back.
Mitsuya knew, Draken wanted nothing but his safety and future, but how could Mitsuya accept that, if he had to lose Draken in the process?
"Do you remember that horrible day when Baji died for us?"
Draken stiffened at his words.
"You remember what Takemichi said?"
Draken didn't answer, but his silence was more than a loud yes. Of course, they both still remembered.
"Baji was fighting all by himself this whole time," Mitsuya quoted, hoping that he could disguise the cracking in his voice. "I think, everyone in Toman always had that sense of protecting others. The urge to shield the others from any harm. The instinct to keep the others safe. Just like Baji. Just like Mikey. Just like Takemichi."
Mitsuya sighed.
"And, just like you."
Draken looked away.
"You're not the only one who wants to save Mikey, Ken," Mitsuya continued. "I am his friend too, I want that as much as you do. So does Kazutora, and so does Pah-chin. It would be unfair to not give them the chance to do the same thing too."
It would be unfair to not give me the same opportunity, went unsaid.
"Taka, your dreams are big," Draken opened his mouth, still not looking at him. "It would be cruel of me to rip them apart from you. You have so much to—"
"And you don't?" Mitsuya interrupted. "You don't think you deserve to have that kind of dream too? If you think you don't because you still have to save Mikey to deserve that, then what's the point? It'll be the same for me."
He braced himself for rejection when he reached for Draken's cheek to redirect his gaze on him.
But Draken didn't.
"They had attempted to kill me, Taka, what if it's you, next time?" Mitsuya hated to see so much pain in Draken's eyes when he wasn't the one with three bullet wounds.
What if you aren't so lucky like me when the time comes? His eyes spoke.
"Then you have to know, that I choose my own way and you aren't responsible for any of it," Mitsuya said. "I choose this, and I'm prepared for what's coming. It's the risk I'm willing to take, just like it's the risk you're willing to take," Mitsuya rubbed his thumb over Draken's skin.
"I don't think I can't take it if something happens to you." Draken leaned to his touch.
"I know, I can't take it if something happens to you, Ken, that's why I can't just stay away, knowing the worse could have happened."
Draken finally let his guard down, when he fully fell forward, resting his head on Mitsuya's collarbone.
"I just want to keep you safe," the words were muffled against Mitsuya's hoodie.
"I want the same thing for you, too."
"You can never be safe if you keep following me, Taka."
"Following implies that I do it blindly like I didn't know better. I don't follow you, Ken, I want to walk by your side, to fight alongside you. With you, with Takemichi," Mitsuya cradled Draken's head so gently, carding his fingers among his hair. "If you want to keep me safe, you have to let me keep you safe too."
They stayed in each other embrace for a while.
Mitsuya knew Draken had wanted nothing but his safety, but pushing him away was not it.
How could Mitsuya go on with his life, knowing that he could be the one save Draken but he didn't? How could Mitsuya stay on his life path, knowing that drifting apart from Draken would be his greatest regret?
Mitsuya made a mistake once, by believing that Draken would settle for a normal, mundane life, not knowing that he had been doing his best to bring Mikey back.
Mitsuya should know better, that it wasn't Draken's nature to abandon his friend—his best friend.
Mitsuya made a mistake once to let Draken do everything alone.
He would never repeat the same error, the same horror.
Mitsuya wanted to be there, to help.
Mitsuya wanted to be there when Draken needed him the most
"I guess, you're in for the long ride, then?" Draken pulled back slowly.
Mitsuya grinned. "Hell yeah, I am. You think, Takemichi would need someone to design the uniform? Tell him, I know a—"
He didn't finish his sentence when Draken leaned forward to capture his lips for a slow kiss.
Mitsuya melted into the touch, learning the words that went unsaid between them. Even if they weren't vocalized, Mitsuya heard them just the same.
Thank you, Takashi.
You don't have to thank me, Ken.