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The sound of gravel under the woman’s boots seemed to bore into her head, the crunch of stone rattling somewhere deep in her skull but also just behind her teeth. Her steps were slow and heavy, but it was obvious she knew where she was going, with a clear destination in mind and a simple candle in her hand.
Her fingers gripped it tightly; knuckles turning white and long nails struggling not to scratch its surface and sink into the soft wax. It was as if the candle was her only source of light in the omnipresent darkness, which was only occasionally broken by the faint glow of the lamps illuminating the cemetery.
This was despite the fact that the candle in Sarah Alder’s hands wasn’t even lit yet, which didn’t seem to stop the woman from finding solace in it.
She walked past the rows of graves, paying no attention to any of them, her blue eyes staring straight ahead at the empty, dark space before her. It was only when she reached the intersection and turned toward the row of newest, recently placed gravestones that her step faltered.
A small puff of air escaped her lips, creating a mist that dissipated into the air as quickly as her hesitation. She covered the last few meters with long strides, finally stopping in front of a simple tombstone made of white slab.
Like many of the graves in this particular valley, it was clearly well cared for and frequently visited. Fresh flowers decorated the ground around it, and colorful cards, not yet damaged by rain or moisture from the damp earth, were carefully placed just beneath the cold stone.
Alder looked down at the grave, taking in the image before her but carefully avoiding the headstone itself. There seemed to be a barrier that kept her eyes from resting on the gold-painted letters, forcing her eyes to go anywhere but to the name of the person that was resting there.
No.
No, it was not true.
There was no magical barrier, no spell or work that kept her from looking at the gravestone. It was only her own burning feelings of regret, denial, and remorse that kept her from doing so. Despite the passage of time, the woman’s death had left a hole that could not be easily ignored and cast a heavy shadow over everyone without exception; her sisters, her coven, the entire Army, and Alder herself.
Still, she knew that acknowledging it would be like admitting to one mistake too many. And in recent months, she had been forced to admit to committing a lot.
Sarah lowered her eyes to the candle she was holding. Her fingers ran over its smooth surface, turning it slowly, thoughtfully. Her free hand reached into her pocket, where the familiar weight had been a constant reminder of its presence since she had left her quarters. She closed her eyes, clenching her fist, digging her nails into the soft flesh of her palm, before she unclenched it and reached further inside to grab—
She stopped and turned her head sharply to look to her right, where she heard the sound of crunching gravel.
It didn’t take long for her eyes to adjust, to find the familiar chestnut hair, and then settle on two large brown irises looking straight at her, lit dimly by the two candles the approaching woman held in front of her. Sarah felt the blood start to rush to her ears and the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end.
Her hands clenched tightly again, the left around nothing, the right around her own candle that adamantly resisted the pressure.
“You shouldn’t be here.” Sarah’s voice was quiet and raspy as she finally forced the words out through clenched teeth.
The sound of her voice seemed to snap Tally out of her own stupor. The woman blinked and took the remaining steps towards the grave where Sarah stood. The flickering flames of her candles danced wildly, threatening to go out.
“It’s Samhain,” Tally replied as if that explained everything. Her gaze shifted away from Sarah. “My sisters suggested I take the longer route out.”
She lifted the candles she was holding, adding to the unspoken. The irregular flame illuminated her more fully, deepening the lines of her face and making her look sharper, older. Sarah flinched as her eyes took in the woman’s face completely, her blood-red hair, the dark lines under her even darker eyes, and—
And she quickly averted her gaze, shrugging dismissively to mask the unwanted reaction.
“Nevertheless, I didn’t expect to see you here,” Sarah swallowed and added, “on Fort Salem grounds.”
There was a moment of silence, during which Alder felt the woman’s gaze bore into the back of her head, and then a sudden bark of laughter filled the night air. It was forced and unpleasant to the ears, and Sarah gritted her teeth much harder than she should have, making the vein in her jaw twitch.
“Why, it’s not like you can court-martial me for this anymore, can you?” There was a hint of amusement in Tally’s words that Sarah knew was fake and bitter.
The unpleasant response died on Sarah’s tongue as she heard movement to her right and the woman’s figure came back into her field of vision. Tally crouched down next to her and carefully placed the burning candles on the grave.
Sarah shivered as new light fell on the golden letters, luring her eyes.
“No,” she said as Tally straightened and looked at her. She held her gaze, refusing to back down under the dark glare she gave her. “Not anymore.”
They looked at each other in the sudden, pregnant silence that fell between them. It was as if the world around had narrowed down to them in that strange moment of something more than simple understanding, when their thoughts converged and their minds obviously wandered in the same direction. After what seemed like an eternity, Tally nodded and looked away.
“I’m surprised I decided to come here, too.” There was something distant in her voice as her eyes panned over the horizon, darting across it as if she could make out the silhouettes of Fort Salem’s buildings through the darkness.
Sarah, on the other hand, seemed unable to tear her eyes away from the woman’s profile. Tally’s skin seemed paler than she remembered, her cheeks and jawline more defined, the last traces of youthful softness gone, turning her into an adult. It seemed like much longer had passed since that fateful day when—
“I was trying to keep track of what was happening after… after I left,” Tally said, swallowing past the moment where she faltered in her words. “I know, though you hid it well, that the Camarilla attacked the base that same day, and I know you managed to fight them off. And I know that’s why Wade let you keep your position.”
The words spoken in that quiet, strangely faded tone sent Alder’s hand reaching into her pocket, where her fingers finally found the cool surface of the golden gasoline lighter. They closed around it, hard, almost burning the boxy shape into her palm.
But the pounding of her heart was more noticeable than the pain radiating from her hand.
She cleared her throat again, angry with herself for this obvious, pathetic display of discomfort on her part.
“I wish I could tell you, Craven, that I regret the way things turned out, but everything that happened that day—”
“I know.” Tally cut her off sharply, the suddenly colder tone of her voice making Sarah’s spine involuntarily straighten. “At first I couldn’t understand it, I couldn’t believe it, that you… But now I get it.” Dark eyes bored straight into Sarah’s blue ones. “I really do.”
The ringing in Sarah’s ears mixed with the stronger rustle of the wind, which swayed the few trees around the cemetery and blew out one of the candles Tally had brought with her. The younger woman moved toward it, reaching out as if she could outrun the wind and save the flame from becoming a wisp of smoke, but then she stopped just as abruptly and pulled her hand back.
Seeing this, Sarah didn’t think twice. She crouched down, pulled a lighter from her pocket, and with one fluid movement of her finger, she flicked it open, creating a new source of fire and placing it against the still smoldering candle wick. The wick ignited immediately, quickly growing stronger.
Only then did she seem to remember that she was still holding her own candle in the other hand. After a barely perceptible moment of hesitation, she placed it next to the two already burning and lit it with the same golden lighter.
In this new, stronger candlelight, the golden letters on the tombstone shimmered with new energy, once again attempting to lure her eyes and force her to read the words they formed.
She squeezed her eyes shut, feeling her throat tighten in an instant, an invisible, cold hand gripping her insides. She couldn’t bring herself to look at the words she knew all too well, but had never read; not at the funeral, nor during the numerous visits to the cemetery she has made since then.
She simply wasn’t able to. She just couldn’t—
“I was devastated, angry, furious, I hated you.” Tally’s words pierced through the strange bubble of noise that drowned out Sarah’s thoughts and brought her back to reality. “But I couldn’t just turn away from Fort Salem, from my sisters… even from you. I needed to know what was going to happen next. And I watched. And I saw.”
At that, Sarah straightened and looked at Tally, whose eyes were boring into her again, right into her soul, as if she could see it better than anyone else who ever had the right to do so. But no words could escape through her still closed throat and painfully clenched teeth, and Tally seemed to read it in her face, because she shook her head as if to comfort her, and her features softened.
“I finally saw that Nicte’s execution was only the first step in getting rid of the Spree, and later the Camarilla. We couldn’t afford to be divided back then, but I, a clueless first-year cadet, felt I had every right to stand in your way and question your choices.” Tally’s lips formed again into that bitter smile that seemed so unnatural on her face. She shook her head, letting strands of red hair fall over her face. “I… it’s not easy to accept how it ended. But I know now that what happened that night was crucial for you to stay in control and end it once and for all.”
Sarah felt something twist in her stomach, threatening to make her sick.
“Tally, it wasn’t your fault.” Somehow she managed to regain her voice, but she couldn’t stop it from cracking a little. “I… I should have prevented this. It was my duty to make you understand better, to make you see before—”
“I see it now, Sarah. I was in your way, and you did what you had to do."
A sudden, rasping sound escaped Sarah’s throat, and she took a sharp step back, shaking her head. Was she choking on a sob? Gasping for air? She couldn’t tell, because the next moment she felt a cool hand wrap around hers and a rush of air across her face as Tally practically invaded her personal space, causing every coherent thought to leave Sarah’s mind as if none had ever been there.
All she could see and understand were the large, amber eyes staring straight into her very being.
“You did what you had to do, Sarah,” Tally repeated forcefully, before her face softened. “And so did I. The rest…” Tally moved closer, but still the only way she touched Sarah was by holding her hand tightly. “The rest doesn’t matter now, does it?”
Air returned to Sarah’s lungs, only to be forced out again immediately.
“No… No, you can’t just say that and expect— It matters, it still matters, I…” She shook her head violently, trying to pull away from Tally again, feeling the need to create space between them so she could gather her thoughts.
But the hand holding her own refused to give way, and before she could fully realize what was happening, a completely real and solid physical body slammed into her own, pulling her into a tight embrace.
At first Sarah didn’t know how to react, what was left of her heart sinking into her stomach. In the stunned silence, somewhere in the back of her mind, she could hear her Biddies’ worried murmurs, trying to reach her and check if she was okay, but she couldn’t form any coherent response through the silent shock that paralyzed her body.
All she felt was Tally’s arms wrap around her body, holding her tight, and her jaw moving against her right shoulder as she spoke.
“It’s done, Sarah. It’s done, and it’s over.” She didn’t know if she heard the words murmured straight into her ear, or if they seeped down her body and vibrated through her soul. “I’ve come to terms with that, and so should you. Camarilla is gone, my sisters are safe, all the witches are safe. What happened that day doesn’t matter anymore.”
Sarah squeezed her eyes shut, trying to get rid of the burning sensation, and let out a shuddering breath. She forced her body to finally move, to sink into the one that held her. She let her hands wander, to feel Tally’s shape, to wrap around her, to get lost in the shock of her fiery red hair. She felt so thin in her arms, unnaturally small, and yet so very present. So very here, with Sarah.
She moved her hand further, sinking her fingers into Tally’s hair, tangling it as if it would allow her to never let go, pressing her closer. She turned her head, burying her nose in the copper hair and exhaling deeply again.
“I always knew you were special, Tally Craven.” She breathed into her temple, her lips almost brushing against the pale skin. “I felt it when you first stepped onto these grounds, and I had it confirmed when you became mine and our minds touched…”
Her voice threatened to break as Tally responded by nuzzling her face deeper into Sarah’s neck and sighing quietly. Sarah swallowed hard.
“It was all there, in your bright, curious mind, shining for me, begging me to let you in. To accept what you meant.” Sarah’s voice was barely audible. “But standing at the head of the Army, knowing that the lives of all these witches depended on me, on my choices… It was easier to push you away and—”
Her voice finally broke, a sob tearing from her throat, drowning out all other words. She felt Tally’s hands close around her impossibly tighter, effectively grounding her, before Tally very gently, very slowly pulled away from Sarah to look at her.
The flickering flames of the candles illuminated their faces from below and danced in Tally’s amber eyes. Sarah couldn’t help but reach out, catch a stray strand of hair between her fingers, and gently place it behind Tally’s ear.
Tally covered her hand with her own, pressing it hard against her cheek and burying her face in it before she could pull it away.
“It was the only way, Sarah,” Tally said, her tone strong and unwavering, as if there was some work woven into her words.
Sarah swallowed another sob and felt the first tears run down her cheeks. Her thumb brushed against Tally’s cheek, moving to trace the outline of her lips, but she stopped herself.
“I regret that I never had the courage to try, to give us— you a chance— And then… When they took you away from that hangar—”
A cool finger landed on Sarah’s lips, stopping her from finishing her sentence. Her gaze refocused, snapping back to the present from the memory that had haunted her every day for the past year. She looked straight into amber eyes that were shining with tears, the candle light making them alive.
“We parted ways not in the way I wished for us.” Sarah whispered around her finger, her lips moving against the cool skin. The touch disappeared a moment later. “I can only hope that one day, soon, you’ll let us try again.”
It took Tally a moment for Sarah’s words to sink in and for her eyes to widen in silent shock.
“Wait… No, no, do not say that.” Tally’s face was full of conflicting emotions, but Sarah knew that the most obvious one was disbelief. “Don’t say things that can’t happen, that are impossible, don’t—”
Sarah saw the tears threatening to spill from those big, doe eyes and knew she just couldn’t let that happen. She moved, and before Tally could finish her sentence, she caught the rest of the words with her mouth, covering the trembling lips with her own.
A soft gasp escaped Tally’s lungs and filled Sarah’s entire being, charging every single fiber of her body.
She didn’t have a chance to think about what she had just done as Tally responded immediately, her lips parting and inviting her as the woman melted against Sarah as if she was made of wax. But for Sarah it wasn’t enough, so her arms wrapped around the woman, seeking support within her, needing her, pressing her chest and lips against Tally’s, melding them into one.
She felt Tally’s hands respond eagerly, finding their way behind her neck and pulling her closer, closer, closer. She also felt wet streaks running down her cheeks and into the gap between their lips, staining the kiss with a salty taste.
Sarah felt her heart clench painfully in her chest, but Tally, as if sensing it, deepened the kiss. Her tongue caught the tears from their lips and wiped away their traces, taking Sarah’s breath away and forcing her back to the present.
When they finally broke apart and Sarah opened her eyes to look at the woman in her arms, her eyes took a moment to adjust to her surroundings. The grayness that suddenly enveloped the world around them made her realize that the night was coming to an end, giving way to the dawn that was slowly breaking on the horizon.
And Tally finally noticed it too, her eyes slowly blinking away the dazed, dreamy haze, replacing it with something else, something distant and melancholic again. Despite the slight blush on her cheeks, tears returned to her eyes.
Sarah shook her head and pulled her closer, cupping her cheeks and pressing their foreheads together.
“I’m done with the Army, Tally. It’s been over since Nicte was executed,” she said, letting her thumbs brush against those soft cheeks. “Wade shut down the Biddy program that day, and from then on I just followed my final order from her; fix this mess, whatever the means.”
Sarah didn’t dare draw a breath as she looked straight into those amber eyes. She could clearly see the moment everything clicked into place in Tally’s head, the way her face fell and her lips parted.
“And so you did.” Tally’s throat moved visibly as she swallowed.
Despite herself, a small, watery smile tugged at Sarah’s lips as she nodded.
“I did.” Her next words were spoken almost breathlessly; “After so many centuries, my service has come to an end. And I can finally join you, if you still have me… If you will forgive me.”
Brown eyes darted between blue ones, and the gray tones of dawn made them look even darker, standing out against the pale skin of Tally’s face.
There was a heartbeat that Sarah wasn’t sure was her own, and then those soft lips covered hers again, making her almost whine with relief. This kiss was shorter, but the desperation with which Tally took her mouth spoke volumes.
When they parted, Tally didn’t let her pull away right away. She pressed their foreheads together again, taking a moment to immerse them both in the sound of their quickened breathing, waiting for it to even out.
“I forgave you a long time ago,” Tally whispered, and her voice, though so close, seemed to blend and drift away with the first sounds of the new day. “But have you forgiven yourself?”
And then her hands let go.
As Sarah pulled away, she realized that the light from the candles placed on the grave was gone. They stood in the middle of the cemetery, the gray sky slowly catching the first rays of sunlight and gaining color as the night behind them lost its fight.
Tally’s eyes no longer flickered with warm flame, now dark and hidden, so different from a moment ago, when they had looked at Sarah. Her smile, however, had not lost its charm, dimples sinking into the pale skin of her cheeks and making Sarah’s heart flutter again.
She felt something twist in her chest and couldn’t stop herself from closing her eyes again. Even if she didn’t want to, even if she wanted to fight and stare into those fading but still amber eyes, the darkness wrapped around her, closing her throat and squeezing tightly.
She felt Tally move next to her, freeing herself from her grip, from her arms, slipping through her fingers.
Once again cool, oh so cool, hands cupped her face, caressing her gently.
“I’ll be there, Sarah. I will always wait for you.”
She felt Tally’s lips on her temple, the softest touch of a silent goodbye.
And she knew, without opening her eyes, that even though the touch lingered, the sweet memory of it caressing her skin, Tally was gone.
Sarah’s head fell to her chest and a stronger gust of wind swayed the trees around her.
She opened her eyes, unclenching the fists that hung tense at her sides. She lifted them, opening her hands and straightening her fingers, covered in dark stains that looked black in the gray morning light but were actually dark red.
Red with blood that was never completely washed from them.
The same blood that pooled on the concrete floor of the hangar, the same blood that decorated her scorching whip before she raised it again to carry on with the execution.
She took a shuddering breath, feeling thousands of needles pierce her lungs and heart as the last smoldering candle, the one she had brought here, flickered one last time before its flame faded into a wisp of smoke.
However, the golden letters on the white slab no longer had to catch the candle’s light, as the first rays of the morning sun enveloped them with their warm glow. The words danced in the light of new day, successfully catching her eye for the first time.
She took them whole, allowing herself to fully embrace their meaning.
Tally Craven
1990 - 2015
Here lies the truth.