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You hold onto him like he was precious.
You hold onto him like nothing else matters.
Like no-one else matters. It drives him mad.
Just another person that worshipped the ground he walked on.
Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly Captain Curly CURLY CURLY
FUCKING CURLY
He bites his frail nails until they bleed.
No it wasn't enough that he was perfect curly on earth.
He was also perfect curly in space.
Him and his pristine blond hair that reflected fluorescent light like a false prophet, fair skin that was barely inconvenienced by the lack of natural sunlight and eyes that seemed to shine of their own accord. The complete opposite of Jimmy. Oh how often people loved to point it out! His brown uninteresting eyes only ever shone in anger, he looked sickly even on earth and his hair refused to flatter his shallow face, people would never look at him with that love filled gaze. Eyes only for Curly.
Jealousy grips his throat with icy claws. Curly, captain Curly... He was one lucky bastard. He was born lucky. The stars aligned to spite him, to show him what he would never be, captain Curly, he never had to know what the common mortals like himself had to go though.
Captain Curly was born to a loving happy family. To two married parents. Only child and only recipient for his parent's love. Captain Curly never had to struggle to make friends, no, his mere presence soothed the masses and his easy smiles fooled the simple minded into a sense of security. Gold atop his head like a crown from birth, what was he king of?
Captain Curly was never bullied by snot-faced gremlins and never took part in the bullying. Jimmy tries to remember a time where Curly ever raised his voice and fails to extract a single instance from his twisted thoughts... not even when he first defended him from some mouth breathers, he never dropped that smile. That infuriating smile. He just had to make everyone love him. Adore him. He needed it more than air. Weakness that exposed nooks and cronies from which to latch on.
Twenty-five years of friendship and Jimmy could not remember a single time Curly ever raised his voice. Not to scream at him when he stole his wallet to buy drugs. Not to defend himself when Jimmy made him take the fall for shit he did. Not even when he punched and screamed in frustration at being left behind. Because that brainless bastard had to keep succeeding and being good at everything, because no matter the subject or sport, the great Curly always tried his god-damned best. And everyone applauded.
But what about him?! What about poor old Jimmy?! Failed brat, parents who couldn't give less of a shit, mother that loved booze more than her child. Taken pity upon by his lordship. Nothing was handed to him. NOTHING. He had to cling to Curly's legs to keep his head above water.
The world was cruel to those who were not born lucky. Cruel to the ones that were not born talented and gifted. He was blonde Jesus and what was Jimmy? Judas, if he were to believe those slit tongued admirers.
So he admits it. He was jealous. Who wouldn't? Most think being Curly's best friend has to be amazing... but they are wrong! They don't know how miserable it is to walk in his shadow. To always be a second though for everyone. And to top it all off.
You... He remembers the first time he saw you.
Pretty little thing.
College student with a gentle smile. Even for him. He remembers you laughing at his jokes while serving his coffee. Cutest barista in the city, and with a nice rack.
He remembers thinking 'Finally! Someone that saw me before him'
How wrong he was. He came back so often, just to see you. Just to joke with you! Just to get a fucking chance. But when he asked for your number, you refused. Didn't dissuade him though... But.
As soon as Curly entered that forsaken Caffè. Your doe eyes widened and he bets your fucking panties soaked right through. Because at the end of his meet-up with his old pal, when they were about to drive to his place.
Curly stayed behind, to politely ask for your number.
And you gave it to him.
Timid and blushing like a bitch in heat.
He begged to have it. Was about to extort it from those closed lips, keeping him at bay out of spite he bets. Because he wasn't the tall, blonde, blue eyed future pilot with a Listerine smile.
And when he explained to Curly that he had tried for weeks to get that number.
Curly kept it from him.
Of course all sort of excuses rained! Somehow Curly had been going to that Caffè quite often, since it was near his pilot school! Suddenly he had had a crush on you since he first went to order a coffee! Why wouldn't he tell his supposed 'best friend' then???
"You always make fun of me when I tell you..." He says. Bullshit. All just stupid excuses. Just like your own.
"I was doing my job... I have to be nice to customers Jimmy."
Bullshit. You were flirting with him. He knows. You were.
If Curly had never showed up that day he is sure he would be the one holding you close on the ship's sofa. He would've been the one that brought his partner on the trip, not him. He only needed you to give him a damned chance! But as soon as you began to meet Curly... it was over. You only had eyes for Curly, only had time for Curly, only talked to Curly, only kissed Curly, only FUCKED Curly! Curly this, Curly that. He couldn't stand that bastard anymore. That so called 'best-friend' didn't even let him have you.
"It's not my choice Jimmy. They are their own person..."
"I saw them first!" He would retort.
"It doesn't work like that!" Even then, he didn't raise his voice, only sounded frustrated "Listen I didn't know you liked them... I would've backed off if you told me to... but you told me way too late! We love each other now... Can't you be happy for us?"
Bastard.
He didn't raise his voice, not even when he punched that 'better than thou' frown, he only stopped him from punching him a second time.
So he hated. Hated and hated and hated. Hated the way you laughed, the way you seemed so in love with each other. Hated how jealous he felt when he walked in on you fucking. Hated how sheepish and happy Curly would become when talking about you. Hated when he saw his dear old friend pull up his pants in a hurry when he broke into his place for booze one night, when he saw you hide under the covers.
Hated that you looked at him, at his dark lackluster eyes like you knew. Like you would rather die than be left alone in a room with him. Jimmy is lucky that Curly is loyal to a fault. Because no matter how often you voiced your displeasure with his presence. Curly never kicked him out, never pushed him away. Oblivious to the burning want and hate animating his resentful soul.
And now.
Stuck in space for a year.
The only place where he thought he would be freed from you....
He sees you laughing and loving the captain. Ring on your finger. He has to stand seeing Curly being the perfect captain, perfect friend who never abandoned him, perfect newlywed husband to the perfect little spouse. Captain Curly who couldn't stand being apart from his dear beloved.
How he ached to break it all apart.
How he ached to have what he has.
To be him.
If he can't.
Then why should Curly be able to be?
It's simple unfair.