Work Text:
" Hi dad" Artemis said
" Oh hi Artemis, you seen happy today" Zeus said on his throne
" Yeah, one of my huntress told me, that there sister child said there first words, isn't it amazing" Artemis said
" First word, what do you mean first word, don't they know how to speak since birth" Zeus said
" Oh no, human babies don't know how to speak or talk when there born, and it takes months before the baby says word and it is usually small simple words, like ', Mama' or ' Dada's " Artemis said
" What no way, " Zeus said shocked
_____
" Poseidon, did you know that human babies can't walk or talk when they are born" Zeus said
" What no way, really, even demigod?" Poseidon said shocked
" Apparently yeah even demigod, Artemis told me" Zeus said
" Well know that you mention it, I heard Athena talking about human babies having no Brain Development " Poseidon said
" WHAT, HUMAN BABIES DON'T HAVE BRAIN DEVELOPMENT" Zeus said shocked
" Yeah, i didn't think much of it but know when you said about human babies can't talk or walk, reminded me of it" Poseidon said
" But how can they function, without a Brain being fully developed" Zeus said
" I mean you don't have one have and you function somehow" Poseidon said
_____
" So your saying that human babies can't do anything when they are born, they have to be taught" Hermes said
" Apparently" Apollo said
" Wait, your telling me my children are traumatized by war" Ares said
" Yeah, they are not supposed to deal with that even a adult had difficult dealing with war, let alone 12 year old children" Athena said
" But war, really " Ares said
" Yeah, and since there brains are still being developed and especially since they are also going through puberty as well" Athena said
__________
" YOU SEND MONSTERS TO MY CHILDREN WHO DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO READ" Demeter said
" I DIDN'T KNOW THEY COULDN'T READ" Hecate said
" Our children are dyslexic " Athena said
" Your child ran away when she was seven, I don't wanna hear it from you" Demeter said
"Oh, i already knew about human development and plus she had my protection" Athena said
" Yeah but my son said that females go through something called period, where they bleed every month and go through pain that is equivalent to dying" Apollo said
" What no way, your son's lying" Athena said
" I am the GOD of TRUTH" Apollo said
" Oh yeah the period thing is very much real, we even have codes and protocol for that for each cabin, and also they are forbidden from doing quests when they are on their periods" Dionysus said
Athena shocked and concerned at the fact
______
Wait, so humans need 8 hours of sleep, Nico is not getting that much at all" Hades said
" Oh yeah, males need 8 hours of sleep while females need 10 with a extra 2 hours when they are on their period and no one is getting that much in camp" Dionysus said
" Oh no you said they also need to eat and drink water to live too" Persephone said concerned
" Yeah they need that" Dionysus said
" Wait so what happened if they don't get that, do they become ugly, will my kids be UGLY!!?!" Aphrodite said
" Relax, no they don't, best case scenario they just faint, worst case they die" Dionysus said
" THEY DIE" all Olympians said expect Artemis who knew that
" Yeah" Dionysus said surprised at them yelling
"they are so weak, why are they allowed to go outside of camp" Zeus said
" Because you make them do stuff for you" Dionysus said
* Every Olympian concerned and panicked expect Artemis and Dionysus
" What's happening" Hephaestus said since he was hearing so much noise
