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Fiddleford Hadron McGucket.
The local crazy old man.
When Stan first came to Gravity Falls, he mostly thought nothing of this nut job. He was just another odd thing in this already insane town. It’s no wonder his brother moved here in the first place, it was definitely somewhere Ford would belong.
That was, until one day the old man had stumbled across the Mystery Shack. Stan greeted him with the same shtick he always greeted tourists with when the old man looked at him and screamed. Stan tried to get him to calm down so he wouldn’t scare the customers away, but he just kept screaming and rambling.
“You ain’t him! What- where- who-?!” the old man screamed, his gaze darting all over the place.
Stan’s heart sank. Whoever this man was clearly knew Ford. Stan couldn’t have that.
So, Stan chased him out of the shack and brushed it off to the customers as another one of his crazy antics.
Stan made sure to never interact with him again unless necessary.
But then Stan got Ford back.
Then Stan learned that not only did this man know Ford, but he was Ford’s assistant who erased all his memories and went mad after working on the portal.
Great.
Then the apocalypse happened.
Somehow, this old guy who had been nothing but a town nuisance for 30 years got Stanford Filbrick Pines to not only apologize for what he had done, but also managed to get a hug from him.
A hug.
Anger and jealousy burned throughout Stan’s body as he watched their reunion. How the fuck did this guy who literally did nothing to help get Ford back, get a hug and apology from him?! Why did Ford look at him like he was the most precious thing on this Earth next to maybe the twins?! What did he do to deserve this?!
And then Stan saved the universe.
Ford finally thanked him for everything he did for him and apologized.
It finally felt like things were going his way.
But then Ford started hanging out with Fiddleford again.
Because of course he did.
Stan wasn’t jealous. Why would he be jealous?
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It was a pleasant Sunday evening. The kids were hanging out in their room, Soos and Melody were having dinner in the kitchen, and Stan somehow managed to get Ford to watch Duchess Approves with him. He will not explain how that happened, he was just pleased with the results.
When the commercial break came on, Ford chuckled, “Y’know Stanley, at first I was skeptical, but this is a really entertaining show. It reminds me of the old dramas Ma used to watch when we were kids.”
Stanley felt pride well in his chest and chuckled as well, “Huh, yeah I guess you’re right, I don’t think I realized that before.”
Before they could go further into their conversation, there was a knock at the door. Of course there was…
Stan sighed and stood up to go open the door when he was greeted with none other than Fiddleford Hadron McGucket.
Great.
He was standing there nervously with his hat in his hand and asked, “Oh, pardon me, but is Ford in there?”
Why was he being so polite? Just a few months ago he was rummaging through Lazy Susan’s trash.
Stan frowned, “Uh, yeah. Let me get him.”
Of course, why couldn’t he just enjoy an afternoon watching Duchess Approves with his brother? Why did he have to ruin this?
“Stanford, Fiddleford is at the door,” Stan announced coldly.
Ford looked up, smiled and practically bounced to the door, “Oh really?! That’s great! Let me just-” he pushed past Stan and greeted Fiddleford.
Of course.
Stan didn’t really bother to listen to their conversation. Why would he? It wasn’t like either of them wanted him there.
But then he heard Fiddleford ask, “So, I was thinking, could ya potentially help me find some parts for this machine do-dad I’m working on? It shouldn’t take too long, we’d just be searching through the dump.”
Stan froze.
Ford smiled and exclaimed, “Of course I could help with that!”, still bouncing a bit.
Stan frowned, “Wait, what about watching Duchess Approves? There’s still a few hours left,” he asked. Was Ford seriously blowing him off again?!
Ford froze, then stuttered a bit, glancing all over the room. Looks like the genius forgot all about his brother, again.
Fiddleford answered for Ford, “Oh, well, you don’t have to help me. I can probably figure it out myself,” then paused and offered with a smile, “though, y’know, Stanley, if you want to, you can come with us. I could use another hand.”
Stan immediately bristled at that idea. There’s no way-
Until Ford looked at him with puppy eyes and practically begged him with the single words, “Please, Stanley! It’d be really fun!”
Damn it.
Stan sighed, “Alright sure, I can help you with whatever this nerd thing is,”
Ford beamed at him.
This was going to be uncomfortable.
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At the dump, Fiddleford stood up as tall as he could manage, and gave them their orders, “Alright boys, for my machine we’re going to need the following items: an old car motor, a large metal barrel, some old scrap metal from them broken arcade games, and…”
Stan started zoning out. Why did he agree to come to this? He was already sick of the horrid smell here, garbage mixed with the summer heat was an ungodly combination.
Fiddleford finished explaining their tasks and gave Stan and Ford a list of things to look for. Ford practically soluted him and ran off to start finding his items.
Stan internally groaned and looked over his list. All the items seemed to be things that were rather easy to find. Maybe if he just found everything quick they’d be done before the sun sets. Maybe he and Ford would be able to finish Duchess Approves.
So, Stan set off to find his items.
The first 5 things were rather easy. Stan quickly gathered them up and put them in the old wheelbarrow that Fiddleford brought over.
The next 3 were more of a challenge.
Stan had to dig through the mountain of trash. He could only bring himself to be distantly grateful for the work gloves that Fiddleford got for him. The rest of his clothes quickly got messy as he trudged through mud, got trash all over his pants and his shirt. While he didn’t mind getting dirty, he definitely had other things he wanted to do.
That’s not even to mention the god awful heat. Ford was still wearing his turtleneck sweater and Stan had no idea on how he wasn’t passing out from heat stroke.
Stan’s body quickly began to protest this activity. His joints were aching, he was covered in sweat, his skin decided to be very itchy as if he were back to being a teenager, and his muscles ached.
Stan strongly considered throwing in the towel and going home when suddenly, he heard Ford call out.
“Stanley! Fiddleford! Check this out! I think this is some kind of-” Ford continued to ramble about whatever this thing was.
Stan sighed, got up from the trash pile he was searching, stretched a bit and headed over to see what Ford was all excited about.
Ford was sitting cross legged, staring intently at some… Stan couldn’t even begin to try and understand what he was looking at. It was some kind of walking mushroom with bat wings and a mouth??? At this point Stan knew better than to try and understand these things.
Ford beamed at him and Fiddleford and began to ramble excitedly about whatever this was.
Stan didn’t bother trying to keep up with what he was saying. So, he let his attention wander a bit then noticed something odd.
Fiddleford wasn’t excited about this. Instead, he was just looking at Ford with a fond and exasperated expression.
Stan furrowed his brows and elbowed Fiddleford a bit. Ford stopped paying attention to what they were doing despite continuing his rambles.
“Hey, why aren’t you excited about this? Aren’t you all into this nerdy crap?” Stan whispered.
Fiddleford gave a quiet chuckle and shook his head, “Oh no, I’m not. I’ve always been more into the mechanics side of things while Ford was more into the ‘anomalies’, as he puts it. It was kinda our thing,” he explained, still holding onto his fond expression.
‘Our thing’
Of course.
Before Stan could retort back with anything, Fiddleford continued, “Even though we’re not into the same things, I still love to see his excitement with these things. He gets so pulled into things, like the rest of the world goes away and the thing he’s interested in is the only thing that exists that is important,” he huffed a bit, “It can get easy to feel like you’re not important when he does that, but you can tell it’s not on purpose. He shows that he thinks your important by showin’ the thing to you. You may not get it, but you know that he’s excited and that he wants you to experience the same excitement. He sorta reminds me of a child in that way,” Fiddleford chuckled.
“Yes, a child. I remember my lil’ Tatertot used to get like that. He loved dinosaurs as a kid. He’d read so many books, draw so many pictures, and would talk nonstop about them. I still remember him going up to me and excitedly saying, ‘Daddy! Daddy! Did you know that chickens are dinosaurs! This book says…’ and he’d go on like that for many minutes,” Fiddleford finished, still smiling at it all.
Stan froze a bit, then looked at Ford again. Ford stopped rambling and seemed to be poking at the mushroom thing with some kind of stick. The mushroom mostly ignored it and went to eat some moss nearby. Stan thought about what Fiddleford just said and… he could see it. In the past, Stan mostly excused his antics as just weird nerd stuff that he didn’t understand because Stan wasn’t a nerd. But… yeah he did seem to have the energy of a child, but instead of being obsessed with dinosaurs, he was obsessed with weird nerd stuff.
Stan wasn’t sure how to feel about this revelation.
“Huh, you don’t say…” Stan responded, flatly.
Fiddleford then seemed to realize something, and turned to him.
“Y’know, I was thinking. I don’t think we’ve actually formally met,” Fiddleford announced.
Stan raised an eyebrow, “Excuse me?”
“I mean, you as Stanley and me as Fiddleford. We knew of each other before this, but you were ‘Stanford’ and I was Old Man McGucket. Y’know, before I forgot everything, I really wanted to meet you, Stanley,” Fiddleford explained with a smile, this time directed at him.
Stan bristled a bit, “What- me? You wanted to meet me? Did Ford even talk about me?! Did he even say anything good about me?!” Stan demanded.
Fiddleford chuckled a bit, “Of course I wanted to meet you. You are right in that Ford didn’t talk about you much, but he did talk about you sometimes, usually after gettin’ a few drinks into him. You’re also right in that he didn’t always have very kind things to say about you, but I could tell he still cared about you, even if he pretended otherwise,” Fiddleford explained.
Stan rolled his eyes, of course Ford shit-talked him to his friend, “Right…” he responded flatly.
“Plus, I figured he probably wasn’t telling the full story. I remember meeting your fella’s dad and I could tell he was probably a big part of why Ford was so… unhappy,” Fiddleford finished with a solemn look in his eyes, “I hoped that one day you two would make up and I’d be able to meet you. From his happy stories, you definitely seemed like quite a character. It appears that I was right,” Fiddleford finished with a chuckle.
Why was he being nice to him? No one was ever nice to him ever. Did this guy think he was better than him or something?
Fiddleford then turned to him with his hand extended, “So, with that said, it is a pleasure to meet you Stanley Pines. My name is Fiddleford Hadron McGucket, I’ve heard a lot of good things about you,” he greeted with a smile.
Stan stared at the hand for a good moment, then internally groaned again. This guy was such a sap, but Stan wouldn’t leave anyone hanging like that.
So, Stan took his hand and shaked it, “Um, nice to meet you too Fiddleford. I’ve heard a lot of good things about you too,” Stan greeted.
Fiddleford gave him another smile and they broke apart.
Suddenly Ford looked back at them, still very excited, “Stanley! Fiddleford! I think this thing is a strict herbivore! It will eat moss and leaves, but it refuses to eat bugs and worms! I wonder if this thing is the plant equivalent of a carnivore like a tiger! I don’t think I’ve ever heard of a mushroom that only eats plants, how curious!” he exclaimed.
Fiddleford smiled, “That’s great!”
Stan and Fiddleford then shared a look of fondness and chuckled together.
Maybe Fiddleford wasn’t that bad afterall.
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After around 3 hours the trio finally finished gathering all the materials for this robot (Fiddleford insisted it was just a machine, but Stan knew it was going to be some kind of dangerous robot).
The sun was setting and the trio was about to part.
Fiddleford looked at the two of them with a fond expression, “Thanks again you two! Your help means a lot and it was great hanging out with y’all,” he explained.
Ford smiled back, finally looking tired after all the energy he spent, “No problem Fiddleford. If you ever need help with anything, you can always come to me,” Ford promised. Wait, was he blushing? Was Stanford Pines blushing at someone?! Stan couldn’t believe his eyes.
Fiddleford and Ford then hugged again, they seemed to hug a lot now that Stan was thinking about it.
Stan huffed, “Yeah, whatever,” Stan responded simply.
Fiddleford chuckled at that and set off to catch the bus to his mansion.
With that, Stan and Ford set back to the shack.
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Turns out they did have time to finish watching Duchess Approves.
Stan and Ford were back in the living room and they just got to the point where the duchess was pining after this duke from Austria when the commercial break hit again.
Which reminded Stan. There was no way he was going to miss out on making fun of his brother for having a proper crush.
“Hey, Poindexter,” Stan began.
“Yes, Stanley?”
“Y’know, I was thinking, do you have a thing for McGucket?” Stan asked bluntly.
Ford bristled a bit, “I- uh, I don’t know what you are talking about,” he coughed, blushing a bit.
Stan rolled his eyes, “Oh please, you think you were being subtle out there?” he asked.
Ford practically pleaded at him to drop it.
“Honestly, I’m surprised I didn’t realize it sooner. At the very least I should have known you were gay-”
Ford groaned, “Oh my god, Stanley!” he exclaimed.
Stan ignored that and continued, “You never really were that interested in girls after all. I think you only really tried to get a girlfriend because I was… and you never really seemed to care that much when you got rejected outside of the normal ‘everyone hates me’ thing you always have.”
Ford covered his face, “Why are you like this?”
“I mean, don’t think I have a problem with that. Love is love after all, I’m pretty sure Mabel would also have my head if I tried to think otherwise,” Stan continued, he also internally made sure to try and avoid telling Mabel about this. He’d spare Ford that whole confrontation at the very least. Man, wasn’t he the best brother ever?
This time Ford had nothing to say and just curled into himself, face burning red.
It made so much sense in retrospect. Stan should have known something was off when Ford never reacted like this when Stan asked about a crush. Instead he’d always just chuckle and say something along the lines of, ‘Oh no, you’ve caught me.’ There really should have been a stronger reaction.
Stan felt a pang of pride. He still couldn’t believe this was his life now. He finally had his brother back. He was finally able to tease him for his crushes.
It felt great.