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Miya Atsumu is like an all-consuming fire.
He’s snarky, and too confident for his own good. Not to mention a total jerk.
But all Sakusa Kiyoomi can do is want him for his own.
Because despite everything, Atsumu can also be kind. He’s barely got a filter, but he’s considerate and thoughtful of his friends. He’s annoying, but he also knows what he wants, and he won’t stop until he gets it.
That’s one thing Kiyoomi can’t stand about him, though.
As much as Kiyoomi admires Atsumu’s steadfast and determined attitude, and the way he doesn’t take shit from anyone, it also kills him sometimes.
It kills him to watch Atsumu saunter up to other people, chat them up like Kiyoomi isn’t right there. Like Kiyoomi hasn't been pining over him since he was emotionally intelligent enough to make sense of the way his brain shut off whenever Atsumu was around, or the way his limbs seemed to lock up when he got a hair too close.
He just can’t stand it.
It’s not like he could ever do anything about it, though. They’re not even together, never have been together. Kiyoomi doesn’t want to seem like a possessive creep.
Especially to Atsumu, who’s been the unknowing object of his affections ever since Kiyoomi first saw him.
The thing Kiyoomi regrets most is never making a move on Atsumu. Now he’s stuck in college, slaving away over papers and labs while Atsumu is gallivanting about with his fancy pro-league team. Miles and miles away from each other, without Kiyoomi ever saying a word about his feelings.
Kiyoomi feels like after the years have gone by after high school, his incredibly pathetic crush on Atsumu has died down.
Until he wakes up one day to a post of Atsumu announcing his newest relationship.
Not a great way to start his day, especially not at 7:43AM.
It’s a silly thing to be upset about, but it makes Kiyoomi’s blood boil all the same. He pulls at curls, sighing through his nose as he tries to reign in the ugly, green monster lurking in his belly.
He always was a jealous person after all.
“I wish I could go back in time…” He mutters to himself, the rest of his sentence swimming in his head.
…And grow a pair.
The air seems to still for a moment, a faint ripple through the space in the room, before everything resumes as normal.
It doesn’t go unnoticed by Kiyoomi, and he’s a little weirded out, but maybe he’s just tired.
He moves to lay back down in his bed, picking his phone up to stare at Atsumu’s newest post for the nth time.
His gaze drifts to the corner of the screen lazily, and he blinks.
Once. Twice. Then three times.
7:37AM.
Wasn’t it just…
Kiyoomi jolts up, blinking down at his phone as he tries to make sense of it. He’s worried his phone is broken. He doesn’t really have the time or energy to replace it.
Taking a glance at the clock on his wall only makes his stomach sink further.
Maybe today was the start of daylight savings and he forgot all about it?
But that puts you a whole hour back. Not a measly six minutes.
Ah, right. It’s just six minutes. Nothing to worry about.
Except Kiyoomi is definitely worrying about it. It’s one thing for his phone to be malfunctioning, but another for his (seemingly) still-working clock to be broken as well.
Maybe it was time to replace his things…
Kiyoomi sighed again, running his hands down his face, almost agonized. This was going to bug him for the rest of the day, maybe even the rest of the week.
His thoughts drift back to Atsumu once more as he stares up at his bumpy ceiling.
I wish I just told him how I felt back then.
Kiyoomi’s thoughts feel too loud for his own head, and he turns on his side to glare holes into the wall. He really did want to go back in time at this very moment.
The air around him ripples again, and it feels awfully off to Kiyoomi. He takes another glance at his phone, unease curling in his gut.
7:26AM.
All Kiyoomi can do is stare.
But then he gets an idea. A stupid, reckless idea, but an idea nonetheless.
And so he wishes a little harder to go back in time.
Call him selfish. He doesn’t care.
Now that he knows he can do this, he can stop Atsumu from getting with anyone but him. It’s a great idea.
ー
Kiyoomi keeps his eyes closed until he’s satisfied with how much wishing he’s done, and the air around him feels different, the chatter of conversations filling his ears.
He blinks open his eyes to the very last time he saw Atsumu in person before they went their separate ways.
Kiyoomi remembers this day like it was yesterday, and he can feel the crisp air around him as he nuzzles further into his scarf.
A couple yards away stands Miya Atsumu, in all of his glorious glory.
Kiyoomi almost forgot how beautiful he really was (is).
He’s laughing and smiling with his teammates, waiting by the curb for their bus to arrive. It was right after the last game they had played against each other.
Kiyoomi’s throat feels dry all over again, just like that day.
He won’t let himself run away again though.
“Miya.” Kiyoomi calls, stepping forward a bit, his hands shoved into his pockets.
He watches as a few heads turn in his direction, but he doesn't care about them. All he cares about is the way Atsumu turns to look at him, eyes round and curious. He finally seems to notice Kiyoomi standing there, and his lips quirk up into a half-smirk.
“Heya, Omi-kun.”
Suddenly his hands feel a little sweaty, and he grimaces behind his mask at the feeling.
“Can we talk?” Kiyoomi says, nearly croaks, as he nods his head in a direction away from all the watching eyes.
He feels like his heart is about to leap out of his throat.
Atsumu stares at him for a moment, as if he isn’t quite sure what to make of Kiyoomi’s request. He glances to his side at Osamu for a moment, before nodding and shoving his own hands into his pockets.
“Yeah, sure. We can talk.”
Kiyoomi nods stiffly in return, turning on his heels to lead them to a quieter area, one where they’d have a little more privacy.
He can only hope that Atsumu is following him.
He takes a deep breath, mustering up the courage to speak.
Even after letting his feelings fester for so long, he’s still unsure of what to say when faced with Atsumu.
“Miya.” He starts, but cringes at the sound of it, clearing his throat awkwardly.
“Atsumu.“ He amends, turning around to meet Atsumu’s gaze, the setter's pupils dilated.
Kiyoomi isn't sure if it's a trick of the light, but before he can question it, Atsumu is breaking eye-contact and turning his gaze to the floor.
"What did ya wanna talk about, Omi-kun?" Atsumu asks, and Kiyoomi is sure he can see a slight rosy pink biting at Atsumu's ears. He can't tell if it's from the cold, or from something else.
Kiyoomi clears his throat again, feeling like his words are stuck at the back of it. He desperately wants to just spit them out.
And so he does.
"I like you, Atsumu." He says, as blunt and straightforward as ever. It's the understatement of the century, but he says it anyways.
And apparently, Kiyoomi should've said this a long time ago.
Atsumu's head snaps up to meet his gaze, his eyes wide and unblinking. It doesn’t take long for his cheeks to flush visibly with color, and Kiyoomi knows it isn’t just from the cold this time. He starts sputtering in shock for a moment, trying to find his own words.
Kiyoomi just watches him look like a deer in headlights. Surprise looks cute on him.
"I- Ya do?" Atsumu finally says after he manages to compose himself, his fingers grasping onto the collar of his zip-up jacket.
Kiyoomi just nods, his eyes sweeping over Atsumu's lovely face, and he feels himself falling all over again. "I do."
Atsumu's eyes look like they're positively shining, and Kiyoomi swears he can see every star swimming in those honeyed hazel pools.
"I... I like ya, too, Omi-kun."
Atsumu isn’t good for his heart. Kiyoomi can feel it bursting in his chest as he stares back at the blond in front of him.
It only takes Kiyoomi a moment for him to close the distance between them, his hands rising and cradling Atsumu's face delicately.
A moment later, he leans in to press his lips against Atsumu's, forgetting all about his mask in his excitement and recoiling in surprise when he doesn't feel the soft warmth of Atsumu's lips against his.
And even as Atsumu giggles and makes fun of him, moving to pull his mask down himself and leaning in to try again, it feels like everything he's ever wanted as he wraps Atsumu up in his arms.
I've waited for this, he thinks.